#perceptor // ic

[rifleseye]

@for-the-better-and-worse said.

"Something for you, if you could do me the favor of looking it over. Spoils of the meeting."

— He had only watched from a distance, but something about the politician's demeanor put him on edge. He's just glad it's over, and if he notices Prowl seems equally disturbed he doesn't say anything about it. Perceptor regards the tablet for a moment before he takes it into hand.

"Of course..." he does not wait for Prowl to leave before he starts skimming over it. Lines of formulas and math and... (something nags at him, the way this is laid out. The way it keeps drawing him in.)

After a moment his brows furrow and he worries his bottom lip. "Is this... This is reminiscent of the technology that was thought to be lost with Alchemist Prime. How did... hold on there's something here..."

He continues to stare at it, there's something wrong in one of the equations, a string of letters and numbers that doesn't make sense. He freezes when he sees it. His hands don't shake anymore but his brain supplies him with the fact that they should be. He feels sick.

SAV0551250.

[stinglikeame]

If Percy was the size of a human microscope, I think I’d carry him around on my shoulder. Like a cybird.

[ask-tfa-ministry-of-science]

Perceptor may not often offer a wager, but far be it from he to reject one.

A bit of gambling is always good fun. Even if he doesn’t experience fun quite like others do.

[rodismancave]

For “christmas” I’m drinking my ass into oblivion then getting lost at sea

[captainseamech]

.... not sure if he should ask.

[iacon-daily]

Okay you know what, here’s what every major MTMTE character smells like (that I can think of, and not counting villains atm)

Rodimus - Burnt Orange Crush soda

Thunderclash - Think of any cologne. That’s what he smells like.

Drift - Vinegar covered up with so much incense that it gives you a headache

Ultra Magnus - Pear with hints of “”unscented”” lotion chemicals

Megatron - Gunpowder or lemongrass. I can’t decide.

Ravage - That new toy smell and cardboard

Ratchet - Very light juniper, burnt rubber, and WD-40

First Aid - Sour pink lemonade (On the job, just smells like lemon cleaner)

Velocity - Passionfruit with a bit of mango

Ambulon - Root beer or Dr. Pepper

Chromedome - Orange cleaner

Perceptor - The inside of an empty freezer besides ice cubes

Brainstorm - Sour green apple

Nautica - Berries and cream

Riptide - Silicone

Red Alert - Pine Sol

Blaster - Faint tootsie-Roll

Trailcutter - Fireball whisky

Rewind - Copper and maraschino cherries

Pipes - Vintage toy store / comic book store

Skids - Bratwurst with copious toppings

Anode and Lug - Distant smoke and wet rocks

Roller - Fruit punch caprisun

Cyclonus - Mothballs and cyprus

Tailgate - Overly sweet, stale, strawberry marshmallows

Whirl - Gunpowder and margaritas

Swerve - Gasoline

Ten - Alcohol markers being applied to paper

Nightbeat - Black coffee with hints of mocha

Sunstreaker - Boys locker room, AXE smell included

Bob - Basil

Fortress Maximus - Excessively strong catnip and herbs

Rung - Old. Just. Old. Musty.

Misfire - Every Mountain Dew flavor combined

Fulcrum - Bike shop

Krok - You know that smell when you go to a friend’s place? It’s that.

Crankcase - Smoke and rain

Spinister - Artificial lavender

Grimlock - Hot cooking oil

Nickel - Leather

[tinydefector]

Transformers Energy fluid AU

Request are open

Original taste au is by @callsign-relic

There's alot of stuff over transformers loving the taste of humans, from the sweat of their skin and arousal and this got me thing and I went down a rabbit hole of transformers transfluid taste like Energy drinks. And humans can't get enough of it,

Imagine you're going down on your favourite bot and getting a mouthful, and instead of it tasting God awful, you're just there like. 'Why does that taste like monster Mango loco?' The bots don't really take much notice to it until they realise their partner seems alot more interested in oral with them.

And on that thought, imagine both sides of it, humans tasting amazing to Cybertronians and vice versa.

With that out of the way I present to you my chart of what I believe different bots taste like.

Bulkhead: monster ultra paradise

Megatron: monster Zero Ultra

Rodimus: Ultra peachy keen

Ironhide: monster mule (ginger brew)

Ratchet: Mother Original

Ultra Magnus: monster Zero sugar

Tailgate: monster punch mango loco

Cyclonus: mother Lava guava

Drift, Rung: monster Ultra Gold

Optimus prime, Breakdown: Blue V

Starscream: monster Juiced Khaotic

Pharma: monster Juiced Monarch

Bumblebee: Mother Passion

Prowl: monster Juiced Pipeline punch

Knockout: monster ultra strawberry dreams

Whirl: Mother Epic swell

Swerve: V raspberry lemonade

Soundwave: mother original, zero sugar

Shockwave, Tarn: Mother frosty berry

First-aid: V original

Brainstorm: mother Rainbow Sherbee

Skids: red bull

Mirage: Rockstar Jucied El mango

Perceptor: Rockstar Recovery

Red alert: rockstar Refresh summer fruits

Thundercracker, astrotrain: Rockstar Punched

Thunderclash: rockstar original

Getaway: C4 original

Arcee: Mother Razzle berry

Blitzing: monster ultra violet

Jazz: rockstar Silver Ice

Thank you for coming to my Ted talk and enjoy, use how you wish.

Let me know if you would like to be added to tag list (tagged for every fic)

[yan-shann]

Perceptor and Brainstorm are so much mischaracterized... Like, guys, Brainstorm is a cold dude with one or two emotions [:3] and Chrome is literally his only friend (he have Nautica later, but still). And Perceptor is a very emotional bro who just does what he wants and is in his comfort zone, plus have a netural-good with almost ALL of crew of lost light. PERCEPTOR LITERALLY TOOK THE FIRST STEPS TOWARDS THEIR FRIENDSHIP (after Brainstorm's "Simpatico", he offered him to become partners in the laboratory and Brainstorm was very exited), no, of course, Brainstorm clearly cares either, but it was Percy who was the drama queen here, and not Brainstorm, why did you mix them up??? Like stop making Perceptor a block of ice, I beg you. Both of them have more deep character, not just ice-cube Percy and silly Brainstorm

Im tired of mischaracterized fanficsnaoa((

But maybe i just don't understand them clear.

[icypolargirl78]

sharing a small snippet of my fic, "Dead and Melting Ice" for the @tf-bigbang! It follows Ravage and Minimus as they follow a distress beacon on a planet shrouded in ice and snow. They find a lot more than they bargained for~ I'm partner with the lovely @pricklybruin whose piece is just so lovely <3

[ Image ID: A picture of a google docs screenshot set to dark mode. The text reads as such:

“Ravage?” Minimus’ field brushed against his plating. There was an odd assortment of worry/excitement/fear mixed into the signals. “Are you alright?” 

“I’m fine.” Ravage dumped as much confidence into his tone, pushing his EM field as far as he could to fully blanket Minimus in his feelings. “I’m merely concerned about all the snow.” 

“Ah yes…” Minimus shifted uncomfortably, slowing to keep pace besides Ravage. “You did tell me about your time on Earth.” 

Ravage knew that Minimus had a far more favourable time on the planet than he, and much like their different upbringings, he didn’t hold a grudge for that. They were on opposite sides of a pointless war and neither were even aware of the other at the time outside of the occasional mention in a field report. 

“It’s not that.” Ravage wrapped his tail around Minimus’. “I only worry that your armour will not withstand the snow should it come crashing down on us.” 

Minimus’ audials perked up. “I can assure you, Ravage,” the turbofox said softly, “that you have my full trust should anything happen. But Perceptor made it clear that the snow on this particular planet is not prone to collapsing suddenly like the kind on Earth.” 

End ID ]

[rifleseye]

Anonymous asked:

Impactor, Kup, Rodimus, Springer- Maaaybe one of the other Wreckers? ..... Driiiiiift?

Anonymous asked:

I'm gonna list a handful off, go ahead and pick and choose 🤔Springer, Rodimus, Optimus, Ratchet

Anonymous asked:

Springer or whirl maybe? Any of the wreckers

Anonymous asked:

It's definitely Drift, isn't it? 🤔

" I will start with the ones that do not require any further explanations. Impactor: no. Kup: no. Whirl: no... As for the others...

Optimus — No. He is decent and, I must admit, fairly handsome. However we were never close. He has always been an... untouchable figure to me. Forgive me for the turn of phrase but: A living legend.

Ratchet — Yes. Though... I feel... conflicted about this one at present. It was prior to my recruitment into the Wreckers. And it was an infatuation born of respect for his work as a medic and scientist. I no longer feel this way.

Springer — Yes. This one was a passing infatuation as well... His moral code and resolution in it was admirable, especially given his position as a Wrecker. And I admired that... But I had other problems to focus on at the time.

Rodimus — Yes. I— well, I'm not entirely sure where it came from... And I'm not sure if it is infatuation or not at the moment. I suppose part of it is the fact he's treated me with respect and understanding... That he would give me such an important role on the Lost Light and listen to what I discover... It might sound strange but it feels, at times, that he is one of the few who understands me and the way I think.

Drift — Yes... Ah... I am not entirely sure I would call this one a passing interest, however... I think sometimes I wonder what might have been were things... different. Had it not been for the war. For my... personal hangups. Where we were in life when we met... We haven't been as close as I would like for us to be anymore... "

[mychlapci]

cannibalism can be a love language if i try hard enough

thinking about sparkeater perceptor slowly consuming brainstorm over a period of time, being so careful to keep his beloved scientist alive because he doesn't want the energon or plating to curdle and rust

i want him to lick along brainstorm's plating, long tongue snaking so tenderly between the microtransformation seams as the jet below him writhes in both pain and pleasure; nerve endings and pleasure centre conflicting over whether or not he should be aroused over the fangs dancing over his exposed protoform

perceptor rips open his cockpit at some point, basking in the beauty of brainstorm's spark as he slowly consumes every part of his partner until all that's left is the spark casing and helm

thinking about a satisfied perceptor, cradling the last bits of brainstorm as his fuel tank rumbles happily as the new spark joins his

-burnt ice anon

Ouohh... Perceptor cannot help wanting, needing to eat Brainstorm. But what little of his processor remains, unclouded by the desire to consume, can only slow down the process. He'll keep him alive for as long as he can, chipping away at Brainstorm's frame slowly, until there is nothing left but a spark-case and his helm.

Brainstorm's procesor is fuzzy, the frayed wiring sliding down his exposed spine buzzing with energy, trying to control limbs that aren't there anymore, struggling to squirm when there is no body for him to move. Brainstorm will cry slowly as Perceptor licks at him, muttering out sorry, sorry, sorry, he has to do this, he has to do this. Perceptor cannot help it. He'll have to eat his spark. He's sorry. Once he's swallowed Brainstorm's spark, at least it will remain with him. For now, forever.

[galvatream]

Info dump time, maybe art dump for Lloyd or Harumi next, anyway, this info dump is for Jay and Zane, so let’s begin with Zane.

Zane hailed from the high class and worked as an medical professional in Iacon, working in the same medical clinic as individuals such as Ratchet and Pharma, he was well respected for his work but was also viewed with suspicion for his mysterious origins. In truth, Zane hailed from the era of Nova Prime and was created as part of a long-abandoned project to expand the Cybertronian population.

This project would be terminated, and all of its subjects would be killed, that is, but Zane who was hidden away by one of the projects scientists, Dr. Julien. Dr. Julien would lock his memories away at some point before Nova Prime left the planet to begin his “enlightenment of the universe.”

Anyway, at some point, Zane would tend to a fatally injured Cybertronian who just so happened to be the previous Master of Ice and as he lay dying, passed his powers on to the amnesiac Cybertronian. Shortly after this encounter, Zane would meet Wu who trained him in the arts of spinjitzu and taught him to harness his Elemental Powers, joining the Elemental Masters in the process.

He befriend Jay and Cole as well as Lloyd and during a mission in Kaon to find the Masters of Fire and at the time, Liquid Helium, met and fell in love with Pixal, skip forward a few years and Zane would become Lloyd’s chief medical officer amongst his Autobot forces in Ninjago, he also happened to be the only one besides Wu, Garmadon and Skylor who initially knew who Kai and Nya were largely because he was the one who replaced their Decepticon insignias with Autobot ones.

He would be present alongside the other Elemental Masters for many conflicts in the war such as the Siege of Stixx, the Battle of Ninjago City, the Battle aboard the Destiny’s Bounty and participated in the fight against The Overlord at Kalis and fought against him again on Caminus. He would remain on Caminus following The Overlord’s final defeat to enjoy life away from The Great War.

As for Jay, he enjoyed life as a scientist who dwelled in Crystal City, he invented many gadgets and devices and even worked alongside the likes of Perceptor and Shockwave, the latter of the two creeping him out considerably. Anyway, Wu would eventually seek him out to train him as an Elemental Master.

Now, when it came to the outbreak of The Great War, Jay would be Lloyd’s chief scientist, helping advance Autobot technology in Ninjago City alongside the likes of Cyrus Borg. So, when Kai and Nya joined, he befriended the two due to their shared interest in inventing, however different it was, he did eventually develop feelings for Nya and when the truth of Kai and Nya’s history got out, he, alongside Cole, vouched for them.

Anyway, like Zane above, he participated in the same battles and stayed behind on Caminus with Nya following The Overlord’s final defeat, helping the people of Caminus advance their technology to a state where they could provide refuge to neutrals and other Cybertronian’s seeking to escape the war.

[noodleblade]

another idea if you want, the Lost Light makes a detour to visit a cold planet and the crew gets to play with the snow, snow fight!

AHHH THIS WAS CUTE ;--; i hope you don't mind the rodimags/rodimims 👉👈 i love them dearly. Also because this got very self indulgent, there's some various other implied pairings:3 I just want everyone happy and having a good time. ok, ive also given up on this 500 word max challenge i cant do it

Rodimus grinned widely as he stared out across the snow fields of Chioni V. The tiny outpost planet was always a frozen wasteland but it was rare for its harsh winds to die and its dark, violent clouds to part for the local system’s two suns to shine through. It truly was good fortune for land for a restock on the planet’s one nice day every 2000 years or so. Or whatever Perceptor’s prediction models had declared. 

It didn’t matter to Rodimus. As soon as he’d seen the opening, there was little his Second in Command or his “Co-Captain” could do to stop him from declaring a shipwide snow day. By the time his announcement had echoed through the intercom system of the Lost Light, it was too late to turn down the crowd of mechs disembarking the ship to see one of the many delights of the universe.

It was especially hard to deny them now when, for once, everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves. 

Close to the ship, several mechs had begun construction of snowmen. Rung seemed to be leading the operation, helping Fort Max’s large servos apply the right amount of pressure to form the balls without crushing them with his strength. In a very short amount of time, the two of them had made eerily realistic figures of various crew members out of the dusty white snow. 

By the icy shore of a small lake, Cyclonus stood watchful guard as Whirl spun lazy circles around a stumbling Tailgate. Even across the distance, Rodimus could hear Whirl’s delighted laughter as he goaded Cyclonus to join them. Tailgate’s own giggles cross the distance. Rodimus wondered how long it would actually take Cyclonus to dare the slippery terrain. Judging by the way Cyclonus inched towards the ice, it would not be long.

Several mechs had coupled off to wander the frozen wonderland. Brainstorm was dragging Perceptor around to look at the frozen vegetation, almost appearing crystalized beneath the layers of ice. If Perceptor was bothered by Brainstorm’s tugging, he never showed it, never making an attempt to pull from the warm hand hold.

Rodimus even spied Ratchet trudging through the snow. He looked cold, but his scowl was difficult to hide as Drift pressed against him, holding the medic’s sensitive hands close to his chest for warmth. Their smiles were soft but warm. 

Out in the flats of the snowy plains, Rodimus could see a group of mechs playing in the snow. It looked as if teams had formed, Chromedome leading one with Rewind taking the opposition. While Chromedome had built a versatile team of mechs all across the different fields of the Lost Light, it paled in comparison to the absolute powerhouse that was Rewind’s team. Rodimus wasn’t sure how Rewind had convinced Megatron to join his team, let alone play, but Rewind looked smug as he sat on Megatron’s broad shoulder, directing his army of mechs with startling ease. If Chromedome was scared, he didn’t show it. He did, however, seem to be building his team in a more defensive formation, building thick walls to protect them from what would be a pure onslaught of snowballs once the fighting began. 

Rodimus wanted to join, eager to get in the fight. He was about to race across the plans when it hit him that there was someone missing. He stopped, scanning the fields again and checking it with the ship’s manifest. Sure enough, one mech was missing. Really two.

Ultra Magnus, and therefore Minimus Ambus, was absent from the crew-wide excursion. 

Rodimus swept the grounds once more, seeing no sign of blue and white plating or the even more elusive green and white. He sent a ping request and was unsurprised when his Second answered almost immediately. Even in his avoidance, Ultra Magnus was prompt as always. His ping came from the bridge and as much as Rodimus wanted to join the festivities, he was not going to allow his companion to hole up. So with great reluctance, Rodimus walked the gangplank back to the ship and made a beeline for the bridge.

Sure enough, Rodimus found his second seated at his station, helm bowed as he reviewed one of the many datapads stacked on his desk. Admittedly, he was a little surprised to see Minimus rather than Magnus, but that surprise was pushed aside by knowledge that Minimus was growing more comfortable forgoing the armor.

“Whatcha doing, Mims?” Rodimus asked as he approached the mech. He grinned deviously as Minimus’s mustache twitched with annoyance at the nickname.

“Someone needs to monitor the bridge.”

Rodimus rolled his optics as he crossed the distance to push the datapad away from Minimus’s reach, using the empty space to lean in, helm just a tad above the smaller mech’s.

“No. She’s fine for a few hours. Besides, you can bring the remote observation meters with you if you must.”

Minimus avoided his gaze as he reached over to grab another datapad. “That’s okay. I’m quite fine working.” Before the datapad could be set in front of him, Rodimus snatched it out of his hands and set it right back on the stack. “Rodimus.”

“Minimus,” the Captain countered right back. “Today is a shipwide snow day. For everyone. Including you.”

Minimus sighed as he pinched the bridge of his nose, optics narrowed. “This is pointless.”

“Megatron is even out there. He’s in a snowball fight,” Rodimus groaned, just as exasperated. “Decepticon Warlord Megatron is having a snowball fight and you are sitting here reading the newspaper-”

“They are valuable reports-”

“Oh, whatever,” Rodimus cut right through. “Come on, Mims, you have to come out. That’s an order from your Captain. Your favorite Captain.”

Minimus didn’t appear to be wholly amused but he still pushed his chair away from the desk, climbing to his pedes with a small huff. 

“Fine.”

“Really?” Rodimus perked up, rounding the desk quick to fall in step with his Second. 

“If I must.”

“And you must,” Rodimus was quick to assure, lest he give Minimus an out to be a bigger stick in the mud. “And you must join me in the snowball fight.”

Minimus stopped in his tracks and narrowed his optics at Rodimus. “Absolutely not.”

“Awwww,” Rodimus groaned, reaching to grab Minimus by the shoulder. “Come on, we’d be unstoppable. I was to destroy Megatron and I need you.”

Minimus looked from Rodimus over to where his hand rested against Minimus’s shoulders. Slowly, the smaller mech reached up and laid his hand over Rodimus’s. 

“I’m sure you can defeat Megatron without me.”

“Obviously,” Rodimus grinned, cocksure and bright. “But I want to see the look of horror on his face as you help me. Please? One game, and you can go back to the bridge if you want.”

Minimus contemplated the request for a long moment, his fingers shifting against the back of Rodimus’s hand before he slowly nodded his helm.

“Okay,” Minimus said slowly. Before Rodimus could cheer, Minimus added, “On one stipulation.”

“Mims, if you are asking me to do paperwork with you-”

“No, no,” Minimus quickly assured, squeezing Rodimus’s hand gently. “No, not that this time. I just…would like you to join me later. On the bridge. We can share a cube of warmed energon. If you’d like.”

Rodimus blinked, the words rolling across his processor for a moment before a grin sprang to his face growing bigger and bigger by the second. “Aw, shucks Mims, asking me out on a date? That’s cute.”

“No,” Minimus yelped, stepping away from Rodimus and quickly walking towards the exit of the ship. “Forget it, actually. We’ll play your silly game and be done.”

“And then we’ll share energon together,” Rodimus called after him, racing to fall back into step. He dropped his voice to a softer whisper, reaching out once again to grasp Minimus’s shoulder. “At night, the skies form an aurora. You usually can’t see it ‘cause of the clouds but we should be able to see them tonight. Together. If you dig it.”

Minimus did not shrug off Rodimus’s touch, quietly reaching up to grab his hand once more. Hesitantly, the smaller mech nodded. “I think I would…I would dig that.”

[cozzzynook]

When Hot Rod is like I don't know six or seven in human years. They go to Earth and meet up with the other Autobots and everyone is surprised to find out Perceptor had a sparkling. Then they have high expectations of him that he's supposed to be really smart. When all Hot Rod wants to do is race because they have race tracks and someone makes a comment about Hot Rod being dumb and Perceptor overhears and punches them in the face.

Perceptor angry is a threat level they rarely use but when it happens they clear out the base faster than a decepticon invasion and hope to hide long enough that his wrath clears up.

Only the wreckers are able to handle it and just barely because they are not used to angry perceptor themselves and they do not want him gunning after them.

Hot rod is completely oblivious to the danger the bot has caused. All he knows is that his carrier is upset and just punched a bots optics out and that he now gets to be held in his carriers arms as he coos at him and goes to get him cyber ice yogurt with the sprinkles he likes so much.

[sroloc--elbisivni]

Something from the Transformers Band AU or Regency AU? Those were super fun.

Five times Drift’s new bandmates were weird and one time he embraced the chaos

The first time Drift realized how weird his new bandmates were, he hadn’t even joined the band yet. They weren’t his bandmates. They were just Arcee and Rod’s friends he was meeting at a diner because they were about to go on tour without a bassist and one of them had heard him practicing on the couch. Drift was kind of expecting to get about five questions in before they figured out he wasn’t worth it and moved on.

What he got instead was the guy he was pretty sure he hadn’t met going, “So you’ve done tours before, right? You know you can handle it?”

“Yes,” Drift said, and got ready for it to fall apart as soon as they asked him about those tours.

“And double checking—you’re not using anything, right?’ the guy he was pretty sure he had met said. “Like, no shade, no harm, it’s not a problem, we just gotta know.”

“Using…?” Drift said, carefully.

“Drugs,” Rod elaborated from where he was playing games on his phone and stealing fries from the guy who must have been the one Drift had already met.

“No. No, I’m not.”

“Do you snore?” the guy he hadn’t met before asked.

“I don’t know.”

“Yeah,” Rod said. Drift tried not to wince. That didn’t seem like an answer they’d want to hear.

“Okay, you’ll bunk with Percy,” the guy he’d met before said. “So how this is gonna work is, we’ll run you through the schedule and the set basics and if it all sounds good, we’ll get you in to talk with our lawyer and—do you have an agent?”

Not anymore. Drift just shook his head, cautiously.

“—that’s fine, you can borrow ours. You can talk to them two and get the contract shit straightened out and call the first tour leg a trial run. Doesn’t work out, that’s fine, we can track down someone else and you can get back to your life?”

It went up at the end like a question. Drift was still trying to figure out what was going on. They hadn’t told him to leave yet.

“He’s in,” said Rod, who had managed to figure out how to interpret Drift’s blanking face in the past two months. “Hey, you should let me be your agent.”

“Don’t do that.” The guy Drift had just met today, whose name he would learn in short order was Impactor, pulled out a pen and grabbed a napkin out of the dispenser. “So here’s what the first few shows are going to look like—”

===

Drift had actually learned what band he was gigging for by the time the publicity circuit started. Seemed like the ‘Wreckers’ were pretty well known in the States. They had pretty regular radio interviews, and after they’d wrapped a very successful first leg of the tour and were starting to talk about him sticking around, they had him come along to one of them.

Drift hadn’t absorbed much of Springer’s rundown besides “Are you kidding me, that’s fucking hilarious, please say that,” when he checked if it would be okay for him to say that he’d never heard of the band before he joined if the interviewer asked. About the only other thing he’d tracked was “Oh, and if we all stand up, that’s a signal that the lady asked a walkout question and we’re getting the hell out of there.”

He’d assumed this was them trying to fuck with him and nodded accordingly. As such, it took him a couple seconds to notice when the rest of the group went silent in response to a question to Springer about some kind of anniversary.

“Welp,” Impactor said, and slapped his hands against his thighs. They were all standing now, and Drift scrambled to his feet to follow them out. The radio host was staring at them with baffled offense, but none of the rest of them even looked at her.

Whirl led the way out of the radio station at a confident saunter, losing his helmet that he wore for all official band business into his backpack in a quick slight of hand Drift couldn’t catch. That plus Perceptor’s sunglasses rendered them just about invisible, as a group.

“So, ice cream?” Whirl asked. “I’m feeling ice cream.”

“What was that?” Drift asked, still glancing back. No one was coming out of the station after them, not even Kup. Were they in trouble?

“I told you about walkout questions, right?” Springer asked. “Stuff about my dad who’s in jail qualifies.”

“...I thought you were joking.”

“Oh, super not joking.”

“It’s in the contract,” Perceptor said. “All of us have things we’d rather not discuss publicly. Some of the press don’t read it, or think that the ‘right to terminate immediately’ isn’t something we’ll actually exercise.” He adjusted his sunglasses. “Kup will take care of it. We haven’t had to show we’re not bluffing in a while.”

“Sorry, dude,” Impactor said, clapping Springer on the back.

“It’s whatever. Drift, you wanna put anything on the list? Shit people absolutely cannot ask about?”

He did. Might as well start big and let them help him figure out what was unreasonable, right? “My entire career before this.”

“Fuck yes,” Whirl said. “I love it. Walking enigma of a man number two. Do you want help making up a fake backstory or are we just calling it a void?”

Drift’s new bandmates were very weird, but he couldn’t say he minded.

===

They were through the second of three tour legs and taking a night to celebrate—both making it this far and that Drift had decided he’d be joining the band. They’d crammed into the same room, along with Rod and Arcee and a bunch of things from the game shop down the road that looked fun. Everyone except Impactor was drunk and Arcee had her head in Springer’s lap while he petted her buzzcut. Drift was pleasantly buzzed for the first time in a while

“Hey,” Arcee said, reaching out to pat Drift on the arm. “Hey. Hey Drift. If you’re with the band now. What’s your carsona.”

“What?”

“OH FUCK YES,” Whirl said, sitting up so fast he fell off the bed. Perceptor dropped a pillow on top of his face. It didn’t dampen the effect. “Did I tell you guys, I had the coolest fucking idea for the next one. First off, I’m going to need a bunch of guns—”

“What are you fucking talking about,” Drift said, because he’d learned that Whirl explaining one of his ideas could take an entire conversation’s worth of words and he didn’t want to move on without an answer. “Impactor?”

Impactor was already scrolling on his phone, and five seconds later he shoved it in front of Drift’s face. Drift could recognize the opening notes of Wreck and Rule before it even got four bars in, playing over an animated shot of a tank rolling down a deserted road. The song built to the opening fermata, and as the saxophone held out the note, the tank started to break into pieces and reform into a helicopter.

“What,” Drift repeated.

The helicopter launched into the sky as the bass dropped and the drums kicked in, and two cars shot off a ramp in the background to come crashing into frame as another helicopter dive-bombed the camera. An unsupported microscope flew through the air to keep up.

“What.”

The next three minutes featured car chases, helicopter acrobatics, and absolutely no concern for the laws of physics. It came to the end and Drift immediately dragged the video back to the beginning to watch it again, this time complete with commentary as everyone had to tell him which vehicle they were and why and the cool effects.

“What,” Drift said, helplessly, again, when it had finished. “Why is this a thing.”

“Percy’s idea,” Whirl said. “Because he’s a weeb.”

“Revolutionary Girl Utena is a masterpiece,” Perceptor said to no one in particular.

Drift hit replay on the video again, because he could. This was so weird. It was so cool.

“I wanna be a racecar,” he said, when it had finished again.

“ONE OF US,” Hot Rod cheered, and tried to wrestle him into a noogie. He failed, of course. Springer helped pin him down while Drift got his revenge.

===

“Hey,” Whirl said, somewhere during a long overnight drive on the bus when he and Drift were the only ones awake. “Do you like instrumental stuff?”

Drift looked up from his book. “Sure?”

Whirl waggled a pair of headphones at him. “Wanna give something a listen for me?”

“Sure.”

Drift knew Whirl did a lot of the band’s instrumentations, and that he got bored easy, so he was expecting this to be a new riff on one of the songs they’d been playing so far, or maybe a completely unknown song for the album that was scheduled for work when they were done with the tour. Instead, he got a string quartet.

Even with the tinny, unvarying tones of automated transcription software, it flowed. It was elegant, all the notes interlocking like clockwork, the instruments passing around the melody and making it their own. It cut off abruptly enough that Drift could feel how much he wanted more.

“Okay, this bit. Is the cello doing enough?” Whirl asked, and played the last thirty seconds again.

Drift hadn’t done instrumental music in years, but he had a pretty good understanding of bass parts thanks to this tour. “It’s kind of boring. Syncopate it, maybe?”

“Well, fuck you too,” Whirl said, and snatched the headphones back. He clicked something and scowled at his screen. “Fuck. You’re right.”

“You’re writing this?” Drift asked, instead of going back to his book.

“Side gig. Cyclonus listens to the classical music station all the time. I will get something on there. He can’t escape from me.”

Every time Whirl mentioned either of his housemates Drift wasn’t sure if he was dating them or not, and at this point Drift was honestly kind of scared to ask.

===

Drift was already nervous on the first day of recording for the new album. It was going to be the first time he’d been in a recording booth in almost a year. He might completely fail at this, and not know how to work with them, or not be able to adapt, and just stick to being a touring backup. Which he liked, it was great, but it wasn’t like he could live on that, and it was pretty damn unlikely that he was going to trip into gigging for any other bands the way he had for this one.

So his nerves were running high even before he let himself in with the code and wandered down a hallway towards the sound of raised voices and found Perceptor, of all people, having a shouting match with a stranger in the production booth. The rest of the band was in the recording booth, all doing things completely unrelated to music. Drift snuck in to join them.

“Uh…” At least it was quiet in here. “Are they…”

Impactor flipped a page in his motorcycle magazine. “They’ll need another couple of minutes.”

Drift decided to take a very long time tuning his bass.

Sure enough, a couple minutes later Percy stormed out of the recording booth and slammed the door open to join them. The stranger, grinning smugly, flipped on the mic to chat with them and waved. “Hey! You must be the new guy. I’m Percy’s ex-boyfriend.”

“I told you to stop telling people that!” Perceptor shouted at the booth. “He’s my husband,” he added in a far calmer aside to Drift.

“Oh,” Drift said. He’d vaguely known Perceptor was married, but he hadn’t really expected...this?

“Mwah!” The guy who must be Brainstorm blew a kiss at the booth. “Oh-kay, if you gentlemen would like to get this show on the road, I need some sound checks.”

“Our regular producer is your husband?” Drift asked Percy, quietly. He was pretty sure this wasn’t standard, even for the American music industry.

“He works for takeout,” Springer said, and played a rimshot.

Well. At least his nerves were gone.

===

The album recording process went...fine? It went fine. It went great, actually, Drift didn’t have to do any singing at all and finally understood enough about how they liked the bass to fit into their songs that he could improv some of his own parts instead of asking Kup for help or trying to follow Impactor’s increasingly incomprehensible whims. The album was coming together, they were creeping towards release and planning the next tour, the paparazzi still hadn’t figured out where he was, and he only slept on Rod and Arcee’s couch when he didn’t feel like going home after movie night.

They were doing their first show in a while, to build hype for the upcoming album, and Drift was wandering around the venue after sound check doing nothing in particular. Springer was nearby, challenging people to dance-offs with the camera guy who was doing a documentary for the upcoming tour and also enabling Springer’s burgeoning social media empire trailing behind him.

“Hey, Drift!” Springer waved at him. “Dance-off?”

Drift thought about it. He was less scared of being found than he had been a year ago. He liked it here, he liked his band mates, his old agency hadn’t tried to get in touch with him at all. He’d found a life after washing out of Kpop. Why not?

“Sure,” he said, and launched into an old routine. Not one of the ones from his last tour, that had ended with him falling off the stage, but one of the ones from before that when his health hadn’t been as bad. It wasn’t one of his flashier ones, but he’d drilled it a lot and it looked good close up.

It ended with him facing his audience, one hand outstretched, so he had a fantastic view of the shocked and delighted awe on Springer’s face two seconds before he tackled Drift into a nearby couch shouting “What the FUCK was THAT?”

Drift was going to assume he’d won.

[wildtige429]

Human Alternates of the Autobots and Decepticons

For @julayla and @neogirlart so you guys can add in your ideas.

So, I have been brainstorming on what Team Arcadia, the human version of Team Prime and the Arcadians will be like. Arcadia is a fantasy land in the human verse where the elf Kinjiru and her family and the elven Commission live. As for where the human verse Decepticons, they live in a very dark continent where demons of Ars Goetia and such dwelled, seeking to claim Arcadia as their own land called Nidhogg.

Human Verse Autobots:

Optimus Prime - Aron (He's a male descendant of the Amazons whose magic amulet turns him into a manticore. Has dragonkin blood)

Ratchet - Rustlen (A tanuki and his amulet helps hide his animal form)

Bumblebee - Beckett (A plains elf whose animal form is a jackalope and has lightning magic)

Bulkhead - Trayne (A minotaur. He avoids beef, cause he feels that its considered cannibalism since a minotaur is part bull)

Prowl - Kitsu (He's a kitsune ninja whose an expert in illusions and controls black fox fire. He can transform at will)

Jazz - Tenko (An arctic fox-type kitsune ninja who controls snow and ice)

Sentinel Prime - Cyrrus (A male descendant of the Amazons and his magic turns him into a tigon)

Ultra Magnus - Leonidas (King of Arcadia, leader of the Elite Knights and friend of Elf Kougato. He has the power of lightning and transforms into a Nemean lion)

Rodimus Prime - Akira (Male descendant of the Amazons, Aron's half-brother whom they share the same dragonkin mother, and animal form is a tiger)

Hotshot - Rammot (Fire elf whose animal form is a fire lizard)

Kup - Copper (A retired war veteran who still stays around to teach cadets and the members of the Elite Knights. He's a mountain elf whose animal form is a mountain goat)

Brawn - Knuckle (A dwarf with Herculean strength. His amulet changes him into a splinter cat, a pangolin-bobcat hybrid beast with a superthick skull capable of powerful headbutts)

Ironhide - Nero (A descendant of the Nemean lion and has the ability to turn his body into indestructible diamonds)

Red Alert - Nikke (A savannah elf, was mentored by Rustlen, and her animal form is a gazelle)

Jetfire and Jetstorm - Orobas and Eligos (Human Phango's mentees who look up to him as their father figure, raised in Arcadia as fellow Arcadians as well as the first demon Elite Knights, and they can fuse together to become Gamigin, a giant winged anthro unicorn with two horns and wings who controls both wind and fire. Orobas' true form is an anthro demon stallion with flames for a mane and tail and Eligos' true form is an anthro unicorn stallion with two horns and glowing blue wings)

Alpha Trion - Merlin (The one and only Merlin himself. His animal form is a majestic kirin)

Perceptor - Percival (A robot-like golem made of metal but is extremely intelligent despite his robotically monotonous character)

Blurr - Hermes (A storm elf birn with lightning speed and runs as fast as The Flash. His animal form is a cheetah with spots shaped like pluses and minuses and a lightning bolt-shaped tail)

Wreck-Gar - Rumpel (He's a troll who was an old elementary school drawing but was splashed by the waters of the Holy Grail, a very friendly but nit-witted troll who enjoys eating trash which helps the environment)

Grimlock - Sword (Leader of the Dino-Men, cavemen frozen and preserved in ice until they were freed into the modern world. Posesses a pyronite (lava magicked gems only found in prehistoric time) sword and has a pet T-Rex named Grimey)

Swoop - Flail (The smartest yet quiet member of the Dino-Men, wields a pyronite flail and has a pet pterodactyl named Flappy)

Snarl - Club (The strongest yet slowest but good-hearted member of the Dino-Men, wields a pyrobite club and has a pet triceratops named Growly)

Cliffjumper - Clifford (An iron elf whose animal form is a big-horned ox)

Omega Supreme - Zhu Long (A ginormous gold and red Chinese dragon who helped the Elite Knights and the kingdom of Arcadia to defeat Marbas and his army of demons, banishing them to the dark reaches of Nidhogg as well as sealing them away with his own breath. After the war, he transforms into his human form which is a huge dark-skinned man wearing Chinese robes and he only turns into his true form to help carry Team Aron on his back when they want to fly somewhere far and to aid them combating large evil forces)

Arcee - Himari (A light elf who suffered amnesia when she and Rustlen were captured by Sitri during the war. Now recovered, she works as a teacher to teach humans how to use magic now that both fantasy and human worlds are one. Her animal form is a mink)

Human Verse Decepticons:

Megatron - Marbas (His true form is a demonic lion-dragon-lizard hybrid)

Starscream - Astaroth (True form is a winged wolf-eagle humanoid hybrid)

Skywarp - Seir, Astaroth's cowardly brother

Thundercracker - Vassago, Astaroth's arrogant brother

Sunstorm - Vual, Astaroth's over-flattering brother

Ramjet - Valac, Astaroth's pathologically lying brother

Slipstream - Gremory, Astaroth's bitchy sister

Acidstorm - Sabnock, Astaroth's bloodthirsty brother

Novastorm - Flauros, Astaroth's seductive brother

Dirge - Phenex, Astaroth's greedy brother

Thrust - Raum, Astaroth's greedy brother

Lugnut - Dantalion (True form is a six-horned demon minotaur)

Blitzwing - Naberius, Aamon and Marchosias (True forms are demonic werewolves that can fuse together to become a three-headed demon wolfman with four arms and massive wings)

Blackarachnia - Vapula (Was an Amazon woman named Artime but was corrupted by dark magic in when she, Aron and Cyrrus ventured to Tartaros, a very dark land only inhabited by monsters and spirits corrupted by dark magic. Her demon form is a massive lioness with eight eyes with the first two above her original eyes and the second and third pairs on either sides of her torso, four massive spider legs on her back and massive insect-like fangs containing paralytic venom. Her spider legs can fuse together to become insectoid wings when she wants to fly.)

Shockwave - Paimon (True form is a pale humanoid demon with horns taking the top half of his head with the eyes on his palms and wings. His elf form is called Pollux)

Swindle - Mephistopheles (MP for short; true form is a yellow and purple anthro cobra with a fox's face and tail)

Lockdown - Sitri (True form is a winged leopard with horns, claws and tail of a dragon and breathes black smoke that causes blindness, paralysis and causes the victim to fall asleep)

Spittor - Baal (True form is a giant demon toad with an insatiable appetite and three tongues)

Strika - Purson (True form is a bear-lion hybrid beast with a viper for a tail)

Cyclonus - Focalor (True form is an anthro tiger with eagle claws for hands, crocodilian tail, ram horns and feet like a velociraptor's)

Oil Slick - Crocell (True form is a black-winged angel wearing bone and skull trinkets, a leopard skin kilt and has a head of a hyena and a tail and fangs of a snake)

Blackout - Furfur (True form is a demonic anthro stag with metallic horns, dragon-like claws and wings and feet like an elephant's)

Scrapper - Agares (Was a normal construction worker named Igor until he, Sal and Zippo, their mean boss, accidentally drank from the Holy Grail (Human world version of the AllSpark) and turned them into demons. His true form is an muscular anthro crocodile with large boar-like tusks)

Mixmaster - Saleos (Was formerly Sal until the Holy Grail turned him into Saleos. His true form is a big bellied anthro alligator who can project cement-like vomit that quickly hardens to trap opponents)

Dirtboss - Zepar (was formerly Zippo until the Holy Grail turned him into Zepar. His true form is an anthro caiman in red armor and has a spiky tail that shoots quills. When the quills hit someone, they become his puppets)

Soundwave - Tsugumomo (A radio tsukumogami that bears a hatred to humans for how they treat their items and tsukumogami familiars and wishes to liberate all tsukumogamis to rule over them.)