#perturbed lmn

[sourle]

Perturbed

YE I SAID THIS WEEK IS OUT SO YEH, it's only the intro. But this is just for a test and I am learning how to write a good story with this. Idk if i will make it a series. And yes it is called Perturbed. This is for a test!

The cold blew around the atmosphere, nipping at your already cold skins. Small snow particles hit your slightly cracked snow goggles, making it even more difficult to see.

“Why does it have to be this way?” you thought, lifting up your mask warming up your cold nose.

Being forced at the frontline at a young age takes a toll on your mental health. Your body is worn and tired out from the stress given on you. Hence why you're slow and fall behind from the group that's accompanying you.

“Yo, [Name]! C'mon dude, the gang is going to first base.” Hearing the uplifting voice pulled you out of your daze. Their bright horns stood out amongst the dull attires given to the forces alongside the iconic cocky grins. The dirty fluff around their neck is a part of the blackrock coat that's given to us after we're sent out to patrol.

“Comin’!” You shout back as you begin to run up to the group, Slowing down your pace to match with the demon before.

The snow lightly scrunches under your boots as you walk side to side with them.

“What were you thinking back there? You look really lost.” He spoke, glancing at you. “I'm just thinking about the war, Cila. Nothing much.”

He hums, nodding his head in understanding. “The war eh? Don't think about it much tho.. it could stress you out further." His kind reassuring voice always warms you up. The way he spoke is like he's giving advice to his little siblings.

“Alright, I.. I won't think much of it.” You're glad to have Cila as your friend. Closest friend even. Maybe because he's the only one you ever stuck around with. The others never linger long enough.

Soon enough the crew arrived at the first base. Parking the D7E23 snowcat into the garage reserved for the vehicle. One of the main soldiers in the base greets and guides the crew to a room with many bunk beds.

The room looks a bit dusty, it seems like no one has used it for a month or so. Some of the bunk beds even lack a mattress.

Not wanting to sleep on the floor this time. You quickly rush to a bunk bed that only has the top bed and a mattress so you won't bother with a teammate who would get annoyed at you.

“Looks like we'll be sleeping uncomfortably here..”

“Yeah dude, that guy is really creepy.. like crazy creepy!” You overheard one of your teammates cutting out your thoughts of complaining. You're not one to eavesdrop, but this one seems to pique your interest.

“I heard he uses people as an experiment.” The other one replied to their fellow friend. “And he usually buries himself in his room.” “I even heard someone scream from his room and he actually was laughing maniacally!”

A third buts into the conversation. You wander off to yourself, watching as the group continues to talk about this mysterious scientist. From their story, you assume this person is insane. Thinking of the man laughing crazily as someone is in pain shivers you.

“Alright all of you! Time to rest, I want all of you to wake up early at 3 tomorrow!” you were pulled out of your terance of thoughts to the sound of the one in charge of the team.

Some groans could be heard and instantly got dismissed by the supervisor. As the supervisor left, everyone began to get on their bed. Time passed and the soldiers fell into slumber.

Turning and flipping on your sleep didn't help to calm your mind. Jolting up, your breath is heavy and quick as your eyes scan through the room. The sound of a bed creak was heard from your side as you snapped your head towards the source. It was one of your teammates. Not just teammates.. best friend.

“[Name]?” Their tired voices call you out, catching your attention. “Why are you still up late?” They question, yawning quietly.

Your breath shallows as Cila turns to you. “N.. nothing.. I just woke up from a nightmare.” You whispered, rubbing your left arm as you down at the rough fabrics of the blanket.

“..If you say so.

“... [Name]?” The sound of the creaking bed frame reaches your ear as Cila lets their legs hang on the edge of the bed facing you. “Yeah?”

“do you.. have any dreams or… life goals if this war is over?” The question caught you off guard. Never have you thought about the future, fearing things won't end well for you and everyone.

“.. I don't know.. what about you?”

You responded, your voice sounded unsure. You can't help but feel scared to even think about the end of the war. Will it even end?

“i.. would dream to have a nice life, maybe a family as an extra.” they sighed dreamily, resting their face in their hands. “No shot, you can't even get a partner.” you chuckled quietly at him.

“hey! Maybe one day, I'll show you and rub it all over your face!” he whispered shouts with glare at you. “Whatever,”

Silence overtook the cold night air. You never noticed how cold it is until now. Cila shivers as he goes back under the blanket, settling in to stop himself from freezing.

“Hey, can you promise me something?” you finally broke the ringing in your ears, looking up at Cila with a down expression.

“What's up?” He looks back at you, holding that same warm gaze he Always carries.

“Never leave me.”

“.. i promise, i would never leave my best friends.”

The same gaze has turned cold, the expressionless face stares back at your Perturbed one. Small sniffles escape your lips as you hold close to half of your friend's body.

The sounds of explosions and guns fire have gone closer to a silent ringing. A scream rings in before you get pulled by someone. you gasped as you let go of the body in reflex.

You didn't care who had just pulled you away from them, just watched as the cold body slowly got buried by the snow, slowly fading in the distance. And slowly you closed your eyes, succumbing to the cold.

[oohfluffy]

LMN Ch.21 | OSH

Group: EXO

Member: Oh Sehun

Theme: Angst | Fluff | Writer!AU | Neighbor!AU

Word Count: 2,061

✎ Chapter 21: Promise ✎

"Why are you still up so late?"

You opened your window and asked him. Sehun leaned his chin on his palm and shamelessly gazed at you, making you a little bit flustered. Just a few seconds ago, you realized that you feel the same for this young man but you know this won't work.

"I just can't stop thinking of you, noona."

You slightly gulped at his sweet words, thinking that shouldn't you be used to his tactics now.

Why is it making me blush all of a sudden?

You almost face-palmed yourself literally for asking that to yourself when the answer is clear and you know it.

"Uhm. That's not good. You should sleep now, it's 12:36—"

"Why are you still up then, noona?" Sehun asked as he stared into your eyes, unconsciously melting you on the spot. You chewed your lower lip in perturbation, thinking of an excuse.

I can just say that I was working—

"Your laptop's off, meaning you weren't working late this time." Sehun's eyes were on your laptop that's just beside you, completely closed and unused.

Your shoulders slumped in defeat as Sehun read what was in your mind.

Is he a mindreader?!

"Were you thinking about me too much that you couldn't sleep, noona?"

"I-I wasn't!" You almost shrieked, making Sehun grin as if he caught you. "I-I was just thinking of random things, yeah."

"Like what?"

"You don't need to know that, little boy. Let's talk about you then. Why weren't you visiting Chanyeol these days?"

"Were you worried, noona?" Sehun bit his lower lip as he stared expectantly at you. You can feel yourself melting already.

"I-I wasn't! Maybe you were just studying or playing around that's why you didn't get to visit." You almost cursed at yourself for sounding so much like a girlfriend that has been left by her lover for a week.

"I wasn't playing around, noona. I study all the time while thinking of you, that's it." And here he is, the boyfriend who patiently explains why.

You shook your head with your unbelievable thoughts.

Why were you even thinking of him as a boyfriend?!

"Okay, I'll go to sleep now." You were about to close the window, thinking that you won't even blink an eye later now that you saw him and with the words he said.

"Noona, wait."

Your eyes widen as Sehun leaned both of his arms on his window's frame and got closer to yours. You quickly opened your window that was half-closed and pushed his shoulders back on his room.

"Yah! That was dangerous! If you got off balance, you would have—"

"I love you."

Your lips parted as he spoke in a low voice, his eyes boring his eyes into yours. You can see how his brown orbs glimmer under the moonlight, how his lips part as he stared at yours, how his long eyelashes flap as it slightly touches the under of his eyes.

The sky was dark, everything was, except the lamps that illuminated your room and his. Even though the light wasn't that bright, you can see his handsome face as it comes closer to yours.

"Did you hear that, noona?" Sehun grabbed your hands on his shoulders and brought them up to his cheeks, nuzzling on them.

"Sehun loves you."

You felt your eyes water as you heard his pleading voice. You just want to say it back but your mind was preventing you to.

You're just gonna make this young gentleman cry when the time comes.

You just smiled at him and gently caressed his cheeks, gaining a beautiful smile from the young man.

"I know and I'm grateful for you, Sehun-ah." You said before slowly pulling your hands away from his hold. Sehun slightly frowned as your warmth escaped his grasp. "But you can't let your feelings go deeper than this. I can't—"

"It's already at the deepest pit of everything, noona. I can't dig them back up." Sehun curled his lips into a smile but a hint of sadness shadows it. Being an observant person, you saw through it and knew he was crestfallen.

It broke your already broken heart.

"I'm sorry, Sehun. You just made a mistake that you'll probably regret later." You mumbled as you slowly closed your window and brought down your blinds but Sehun stayed still and stared at you behind those. You stood in front of the window and saw that he didn't move nor did he get back in. Your heart clenched agonizingly as you walked away from the window and back to your bed.

"If you knew about my condition, you'll just get hurt more than this." You whispered, closing your eyes as you laid on the bed.

Sehun blinked away his tears as he closed his window. He leaned his forehead on it, his breath fogging up the glass as his hands rest on the frame.

"Loving you is not a mistake that I'll regret for the rest of my life, noona." Sehun whispered as he smiled, tears finally set free from his eyes.

"It's the only right thing that I've ever made that I won't ever lament that I did until the day I die."

✗ ❥ ✗ ❥ ✗ ❥ ✗ ❥ ✗

"Noona, I've talked to Sehun already and he's fine. Uhm— It's just because his parents came back and he got pressured in school." Chanyeol explained, his feet tapping, making me raise an eyebrow at him. "Ah, you know things that students make fuss about."

"Okay then, I'm glad."

Chanyeol grinned in triumph as he got out of your room and closed the door, thinking that he successfully made a good excuse.

Not knowing you already talked to his best friend last night.

"Unnie." A knock stopped you from working and Chanhee peeked on your door.

"Yes, Chanhee?"

"Dasom unnie is here."

The said woman came in with a smile and opened her arms for you to hug. You grinned as you stood up and got inside of her comforting hug.

"I missed you, Dasom."

"I missed you too. Sorry I didn't visit you on the holidays. Mom got badly sick, so we just celebrated our Christmas and New Year in the hospital. I got too busy with work too." Dasom sighed as she nuzzled her head on your neck. You rubbed her back as she relaxed in your arms.

"You did well. Take a break first then." You smiled as you tugged her to your bed.

"Shouldn't I be saying that to you? You work endlessly, sweetie." Dasom whined as she laid on your bed as if she was home. You laughed at her before replying.

"I'm sending my reviewed book tomorrow, so I'll be resting and doing whatever I want after."

That made Dasom sit up straight in surprise.

"YOU'RE FINALLY FREE?!"

"The next day, I will."

"WE CAN FINALLY HAVE GIRLS TIME?!"

"The next day, we can."

"OH MY GHAD! THIS IS THE BEST NEWS I'VE EVER HEARD!"

Dasom engulfed you in her bear hug, making you giggle as you missed her warmth.

"It's not like I haven't rested in the middle of working. I rest whenever I have free time."

"You don't have free time, Yeoreum. Stop fooling me. You’ve been like this since we’re in college.”

"Yeah, you caught me."

Dasom pulled away and held your hand excitedly.

"What should we do the next day then? Should we go to the salon? The cinema? Or shopping? Should we tag our siblings with us?!"

"That won't be girls time then. If you're forgetting, Chanyeol's not a girl."

Dasom looked shocked but laughed.

"Oh right, I forgot."

The both of you chatted as if you've never seen each other for years. She told you about the Spring festival that will be happening in two weeks, planning to buy hanboks and other accessories. She invited you to come and you tried rejecting when Chanyeol's voice echoed your mind.

"Noona, let yourself live for a while."

"I'll go!" You squealed as Dasom tickled your waist. She grinned triumphantly and moved away from you before turning her head on your window, where the sunlight shines on your desk.

"How's your hottie neighbor?"

You almost choked on your saliva when you heard the word 'neighbor', maybe the 'hottie' word too.

"W-What are you talking about?" You slightly wetted your lips as Dasom stared at you.

"I mean, how is he as a neighbor? Is he being a jerk to you or hitting on you? What?"

"He's not a jerk nor he's..." You glanced at your window, remembering how he stared at you last night as he said those three words. "...hitting on me."

"He's a good boy then?"

"He is." You nodded as you smiled unconsciously, making Dasom smirk.

"You like him."

"Yeah, I do— What?!"

"Caught you." Dasom giggled as she poked on your cheek, causing you to blush like you're on fire.

You thought of denying it but what would that do to you? Nothing. You're just gonna lie to yourself.

"Alright, you caught me." You surrendered as you bit her finger that was poking you. She shrieked as she pulled away, making you laugh.

"You!" Dasom huffed as she crossed her arms before smiling again. "Tell me everything then."

"Uhm. Where do I start?" You mumbled to yourself as you felt uncomfortable telling your newly found feelings.

"I'll just ask then. When did you know that you like him?"

"I didn't know. It's just last night that I realized that I like him." You shrugged as your cheeks flamed up again.

"So, you must have started liking him unconsciously that you didn't notice it?"

"Yeah, like that."

"Have you felt your heart running faster for him? Or feeling nervous when he's around?"

You didn't need to think twice about it.

"Yes, I did. A lot of times actually. I just thought it was because of my sickness." You mumbled as you played with the blanket under you.

"Did you tell him about it?"

"No."

"Why?"

"You know why I can't tell him, Dasom." You turned to her and her eyes dimmed as she realized why. "He'll just get hurt at the end. We can never work."

"You're leaving something out."

"What?"

"What do you think he feels for you?"

You stopped moving your hands and stayed still as Dasom watched your eyes well up. She grabbed your hands and made you look back at her.

"Does he like you back, Yeoreum-ah?”

Your tears streamed down your face as you stared at her in sadness. You nodded as you tried gulping down the cry that's trying to come out from your throat.

"S-Sehun loves me, Dasom..." You sobbed as Dasom pulled you closer to her, rubbing your back as you spoke. "He fucking loves me."

Chanyeol backed away from your door as he heard your words as you sobbed. His hand fell on his side and he stared at your door.

"It hurts to know that I'll hurt him in the future."

Chanyeol's tears flowed down on his cheeks as he heard you crying and your sad tone.

"Noona likes him too?" He whispered.

He went back to his room and texted his best friend.

1:56 pm

To: My Best Friend Sehun

What the fuck is your plan now? Noona's crying!

After minute, Sehun replied.

1:57 pm

From: My Best Friend Sehun

She is?! Oh my god. Should I go there?!

Chanyeol almost threw his phone at his best friend's reply.

1:59 pm

To: My Best Friend Sehun

Just fucking tell me you planned something for her! You told her your feelings, take responsibility of it!

On the other side, Sehun leaned his back on the headboard and smiled as he replied to his best friend.

2:00 pm

To: Yeol the Giant

I'll make her happy. That's my plan.

Sehun put down his phone and stood up to walk to his table. He flipped the calendar and grabbed his pen on his side. He encircled a date with a smile.

January 20

It's a Saturday, one week from now.

"Our first date will be next week, noona." Sehun mumbled as he touched the number.

"I swear I will make you the happiest person."

Indeed, he will.

That's a promise he made not only to you but to himself also.

—

Fluffy’s note: 4 chapters and an epilogue left. 🤞

— 

❥ Ch.22 

[arxt1]

Determination of new coefficients in the angular momentum and energy fluxes at infinity to 9PN for eccentric Schwarzschild extreme-mass-ratio inspirals using mode-by-mode fitting. (arXiv:2005.03044v1 [gr-qc])

We present an extension of work in an earlier paper showing high precision comparisons between black hole perturbation theory and post-Newtonian (PN) theory in their region of overlapping validity for bound, eccentric-orbit, Schwarzschild extreme-mass-ratio inspirals. As before we apply a numerical fitting scheme to extract eccentricity coefficients in the PN expansion of the gravitational wave fluxes, which are then converted to exact analytic form using an integer-relation algorithm. In this work, however, we fit to individual $lmn$ modes to exploit simplifying factorizations that lie therein. Since the previous paper focused solely on the energy flux, here we concentrate initially on analyzing the angular momentum flux to infinity. A first step involves finding convenient forms for hereditary contributions to the flux at low-PN order, analogous to similar terms worked out previously for the energy flux. We then apply the upgraded techniques to find new PN terms through 9PN order and (at many PN orders) to $e^{30}$ in the power series in eccentricity. With the new approach applied to angular momentum fluxes, we return to the energy fluxes at infinity to extend those previous results. Like before, the underlying method uses a \textsc{Mathematica} code based on use of the Mano-Suzuki-Takasugi (MST) function expansion formalism to represent gravitational perturbations and spectral source integration (SSI) to find numerical results at arbitrarily high precision.

from gr-qc updates on arXiv.org https://ift.tt/3drViFr

[sourle]

[sourle]

Should I take down the Perturbed prologue post?

I'm writing in chap 1 and editing the prologue since it's not that perfect.

[sourle]

The book is out now!

Alright imma head my self out to another months of hiatus

[sourle]

I didn't think this week i would have many stuff to do.

I may not have a date but if i can, I'll upload the book at the end of the week, no promises.

[sourle]

Life updates!

Hello everyone! VSourle here. (Vsauce reference).

So I've been healing myself behind the screen, trying to get over personal stuff.

Besides that I bring some good news! Perturbed story book will be out next week on my wattpad, better check that out!

So stay tuned! On the next post!

[sourle]

Cries in wtf am i doing//

The cold blew around the atmosphere, nipping at your already cold skins. It carries small snow particles that hit your slightly cracked snow goggles.

Forced into the war stressed and drains out your body. It's nothing new, but being put to the Frontline at such a young age hurts your mental health.

[oohfluffy]

LMN Ch.24 | OSH

Group: EXO

Member: Oh Sehun

Theme: Angst | Fluff | Writer!AU | Neighbor!AU

Word Count: 3,254

✎ Chapter 24: Breathe ✎

"I told you they'll start dating!"

"You already knew it before you even said it to me! You're a cheater!"

"Hey, I'm not!"

You groaned as you turned to your siblings who were fighting in your room. You already told your family about you and Sehun, of course, telling them won't be easy. Your dad still wants to have the talk with Sehun.

"Were you two betting about me and—"

"Oppa started it! He said those two will start dating this week, pay me 10000 won if they do! I didn't believe him, so I said fine! He probably tricked me because he knew Sehun oppa and you already likes each other!"

"You—"

"Will you two just take your quarrel outside?" You mumbled as you closed your little notebook.

Chanyeol pouted as he poked Chanhee's nose, causing the other to poke his tummy back.

It will never end.

"Ah!" Chanhee exclaimed as she walked towards you. "Do you have your hanbok for the Spring Festival already? Bora and Soyu are excited about it! It's on Sunday."

"Oh right, I think mine's still at the storage." You groaned in frustration as you remembered the festival.

"That's okay! I'll find yours if you want, unnie."

"No, I'll do it." You smiled at her as you stood up and ruffled her hair. "What about you, Yeol? Are you gonna wear your—"

"Nah. I don't like wearing those. They're itchy and uncomfortable." Chanyeol shook his head as he went to your window. "Is Sehun up? It's 12 in the afternoon already."

"He's taking a shower." You answered as you went to your laptop and opened it.

"How'd you know?! Did you already go past the third base?!" Chanyeol panicked as he opened your window, ready to curse at his best friend, making you shake your head in annoyance.

"What's the connection, Yeol? Will you please stop shouting all of a sudden? You're gonna give me a heart attack." You mumbled as you checked your mails, scrolling the page up.

"That playboy. He didn't do anything to you, did he?" Your brother asked and your cheeks instantly got tinted in red.

"W-Why are you asking me that?"

"I'm asking because I'm your brother and he's my best friend, noona!" Chanyeol shook your shoulders, his wide eyes staring into yours intensely.

"H-He didn't do anything!"

"Promise?!"

You looked away from his gaze and bit your lower lip in perturbation, your hands kept on clenching and unclenching, and your eyes keeps on blinking.

"You're nervous! That means you're totally lying, noona! Ha! You can't fool me!" Chanyeol exclaimed as he pinched both of your cheeks as if you're younger than him. "I'll just ask Sehun instead!"

After that he walked out of your room with a triumphant smile, leaving you flustered and Chanhee gapping.

"Oh my gosh." She mumbled as she stare expectantly at you.

"What now?" You said in a bored tone. Chanhee grinned at you and sat on your bed.

"Tell me, unnie."

"No way."

"Aww. Come on! This is a girl talk!"

"It's embarrassing!"

"You shouldn't be embarrassed! It was Oh Sehun who asked you on a date and made a move on you! You should be proud of it, unnie!" Chanhee pumped a fist on the air as she spoke, encouraging you to tell her what happened.

You glanced at the opened window of yours and saw that Sehun's still not finished. You cleared your throat before looking back at your sister, who's sitting pretty on your bed, waiting for you to speak.

"Well, he brought me to this place where you can see the whole city. It's like a huge garden on top of a hill, the nature surrounding us and it's calming there. He packed lunch for us and we had a picnic under a tree." You happily explained as you remembered the memorable day for the two of you. "It was simple but romantic. I loved it."

"I knew you're a sucker for simple romantic dates, unnie." Chanhee sighed as she smiled at your happy expression. "I'm glad he makes you happy."

"Yeah, he does."

"Who does?"

Your head quickly turned towards your favorite voice and found him—

"YAH!" You covered your eyes with your hands in panic as you saw Sehun dripping wet, a towel loosely hanging around his waist. "W-Why would you come out with just that?!"

"Unnie? What's wrong?" Chanhee stood up and made a move to look at the window but you covered the window with your body.

"Sehun, wear your clothes before I make you!"

"Make me, noona."

Your cheeks were burning as you quickly brought down the blinds, leaving Chanhee confused beside you.

"I'm telling you!" You shrieked as you left the window open but the blinds down. You heard his annoying but sweet laugh, making you smile.

"Okay, okay. Wouldn't want Changee see her sister's boyfriend naked, would you?" He said followed by a sexy chuckle, causing Chanhee to blush. You glared at her as you pushed her out of your room.

"Unnie—"

"Just go back to your room." You mumbled, pinching her cheek as she pouted.

"You just want oppa to yourself." Chanhee stuck a tongue out to you before running back to her room. You chuckled at her before going back to your room. You turned around and went to your desk when the blinds made a sound.

You stepped back in surprise as the familiar long legs hopped out of your window. You breathe out as you reached your hands to the blinds, adjusting it up so he can enter easily. When the blinds went up, his smiling handsome face greeted you.

"Hi, babe."

You almost squealed as he spoke. Your eyes drifted to his top, your lips gapping at his exposed biceps.

"A-Aren't you cold? You're just wearing a sleeveless shirt..." You stuttered as you slightly gulped at your closeness, your feet feeling like they turned into ice. Sehun curled up into a smirk as he stretched his arms on his sides, looking around as he observed your room.

"I'm not cold, noona. I'm perfectly fine. But..." The remaining distance was closed as Sehun took a step towards you, instantly just a breath away from you. "...you can make me warm too, if you want."

"You're still a pervert, I see."

You chuckled nervously as you tugged the swivel chair beside you, moving to sit on it when Sehun beat you to it. You stared at him incredulously as he started checking your laptop out, scrolling the sensory mouse seriously as if you're not glaring daggers at him.

"Excuse me—"

Sehun just leaned his back on the chair, presenting his lap to you as he continued reading your mails. You scoffed at the young man, trying to push him away from your desk when his arms snaked around your waist and pulled you down to him.

"Mmm." Sehun hummed as he nuzzled his nose on your neck, his fingers making shapes on your stomach.

You stared at your laptop in front of you, not knowing how to react with what's happening. You felt waves of pleasure and satisfaction under his gentle touch that you just don't want to move and let him do whatever.

"Uhm." You cleared your throat as you felt it dry, feeling his biceps under your arms.

Oh my god.

"You're not working, right? Play with Sehunnie, noona."

You're not weak, Yeoreum. Come on, you can avoid this living temptation!

"W-What game?" You stuttered as you wetted your suddenly dried lips. You felt his chest vibrate, his breathy laugh tickling your neck. His lips collided with the skin connecting your neck and shoulder, giving shivers to your nerves. "Y-Yah."

"You're gonna play with me then?"

You gulped as his kisses went up to your ear, his tongue slightly licking the skin under it.

Where are you my strength when I need you?!

"I-It depends on what game are we gonna play." You managed to chuckle even though you're having a breakdown inside.

"Let's—"

"NOONA!"

You sighed in relief as your younger brother entered your room, jaw dropping at the sight. You quickly stood up despite the tight grip Sehun has on you, causing him to whine at the lack of warmth from you.

"W-WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!" Chanyeol started panicking as he stomped his way towards his best friend. "YOU WERE SEDUCING MY SISTER!" He accused, pointing at Sehun, who just stared at him with a frown.

"I hate you." Sehun mumbled, feeling disappointed that he got disturbed with his time with you.

"YOU HEARD THAT, NOONA?! SEHUN SAID—"

You laughed at the amusing scene as you went to your door, waving your brother off.

"I'm gonna get my hanbok in the storage. Behave, you two."

Sehun smiled at you before mouthing at you.

"I love you."

Your cheeks flushed as you saw Chanyeol turning to you with a frown.

"I love you too." You said before walking fast to the storage downstairs.

Chanyeol groaned in annoyance as he saw Sehun ginning in victory. He hit his best friend on his shoulder, pinching his cheek after.

"Yah! What?!" Sehun complained as Chanyeol crossed his arms.

"You didn't do anything sensual, did you?!"

Sehun smirked as he leaned his back on your swivel chair, turning around and around, completely annoying the hell out of your brother.

"YAH!"

"Why are you so curious? Mind your own business, Yeol." Sehun laughed as his fingers played with his lip.

"Hmph. Just make her happy with simple things, that's enough." Chanyeol huffed as he sat on your bed.

"I know that."

Silence took over the room, creating a heavy and gloomy atmosphere between the two.

"Should I tell her?" Sehun said, almost barely heard by the other.

"Tell her what?"

"That I know everything."

Chanyeol bit her lower lip as he looked down, thinking how you'll take it when you knew Sehun knows about your condition. He ruffled his hair before closing his eyes.

"I don't know, bro." He mumbled. "I really don't know."

Sehun breathed out a long sigh before looking at your calendar.

I hope the days get slower, that way I can have you much longer.

✗ ❥ ✗ ❥ ✗ ❥ ✗ ❥ ✗

"Wahhh! You're so pretty, unnie!"

Bora and Soyu went to you as you and your siblings got out of the house. Dasom was talking on the phone, probably with her boyfriend. You're all dressed in formal hanbok for the festival tonight except Chanyeol. You're just gonna walk to the place since the event will take place near Han River, which is two blocks away from your house.

"Thank you. You're both beautiful as usual." You smiled as they gaze at your outfit. Their eyes widened as they drifted towards the person at your back.

"Omo! Sehun oppa!" Bora squealed as Soyu clapped her hands in surprise.

"You're coming with us too?!" Soyu asked excitedly, seeing the guy dressed in casual attire like Chanyeol.

"Yep. Gotta guard my girl here." Sehun grinned as he swiftly took your hand in his. You blushed at the contact. You're still not used to this public display of affection but you kinda like it.

"Kyaaahhh!" The girls squealed as they move like worms getting fed with salt. Chanyeol frowned, moving towards you to grab your other hand when Chanhee blocked him.

"What?" He huffed.

"Let the couple alone! Don't you know the rules?!" Chanhee exclaimed as you all started walking, you and Sehun on the lead.

"Rules?!"

"Yes! Everyone knows that if you see a couple together, leave them alone because they'll get conscious if they have audience watching how they show their affection towards each other." Chanhee scoffed at her brother's common sense, making her friends giggle at the background.

"That's right, Chanyeol. Let them be." Dasom mumbled with a smile as her sisters held both of her hands, swaying them playfully.

Chanyeol glanced at you and Sehun, seeing how his best friend talk to you with a smile that wouldn't falter even just for a second. You slightly jabbed Sehun's stomach as he told you another dirty joke about something you don't even want to remember.

You look so happy.

Chanyeol can live with that.

"Omo! Look at that bear! I want that!" Bora shouted over the noise, waving at Chanhee and Chanyeol to follow.

You and Sehun were already out of their sights, causing Chanyeol to panic as he looks around.

"Oh come on! Sehun oppa wouldn't do anything bad to unnie! Have some faith on your best friend!" Chanhee laughed as she tugged him towards her friends and Dasom.

Chanyeol reluctantly let his little sister drag him to wherever, his lips pouting as he couldn't see you through the crowd.

On the other side, Sehun led you through the sea of people, an arm protectively around you as the other made way for you two. He mumbles 'excuse me' to the people in your way, slightly bowing in respect. You smiled as he acted like he's the older one between the two of you.

After a few turns, you both finally got a place near the river, escaping the busy crowd surrounding the festival booths. You laughed with Sehun as you leaned on the railings, where a few people were hanging out, waiting for the fireworks display in a few moments.

"Do you want a drink? I'll buy you bubble tea." Sehun said as he wiped the sweat trickling down your chin. You silently observed the water below, the lights from the city illuminating in their reflection on it. The wind blowing your hair, some strands hitting your cheeks and nose, making Sehun chuckle as he watched you flinch.

"You should've tied your hair into a ponytail. Your hair looks messy now." Sehun gently tucked the stray strands of your hair behind your ear, his other arm still around your waist.

"Does it look bad?" You slowly turned to him, blinking your eyes rapidly as he stared at you. Sehun's fingers traced your cheek, barely touching your skin but the tingles under your nerves were conspicuous to you.

"You never look bad, baby." Sehun mumbled as he leaned his forehead on yours, his hot breath fanning your face, causing tints of red spread on your cheeks. He chuckled as he pressed your body closer to his, his hands rubbing your back as they give warmth on your skin.

"Really, huh?" You laughed as you playfully poked his cheek. He smiled, his eyes forming crescents as if they're smiling at you too. "You're too cute."

"Am I?" Sehun frowned, his lips just inches from yours. "You haven't seen the other part of me, noona."

"What other part? Your much cuter part?" You giggled as you felt like you're the only ones here, the people becomes blurred and only Sehun was clear in your sight.

"No, babe." Sehun pressed his lips on the corner of your mouth, making you close your eyes as you smiled. "The other part where I can show you more affection than this."

When he pulled back, he nuzzled his nose on yours with a soft smile.

"I'm the happiest whatever part you show me though." You mumbled, your fingers reaching out for his messy hair. The sleeve of your hanbok slightly tickling his cheek, causing you to giggle as he frowned.

"I love every part of you, Sehun."

Sehun met your eyes once again, seeing how happy your eyes were and how beautiful you are to him.

He's so grateful to have you in his arms like this.

"I love you, noona." Sehun said as his eyes welled up. He didn't know why he feels like this but his heart was already crying and breaking.

Why does it hurt to say those words that I've always wanted to say to her?

You smiled as you caressed his face, your eyes never leaving his.

I love this guy.

"I love you too."

As those words left your mouth, a loud bang was heard as the fireworks exploded in the dark sky, welcoming the new season, Spring.

Sehun met your lips as the sounds seem nothing in your ears, your focus was only on him. You didn't care if everyone was watching or someone was filming you two.

All you can feel, see and touch was him.

You were smiling as he gently took your lower lip in between his own, you felt like you're complete.

But everything stopped.

You pulled away from him as you brought your fist on top of your chest, your vision turned blurry as you whimpered in pain.

"Noona."

"Noona! Stay with me, okay?!"

"Unnie!"

"Yeoreum-ah! Breathe in, breathe out! Come on, follow me!"

You heard voices around you, their desperate tones were trying to wake you up as you close your eyes. You felt your cheeks wet but you knew you weren't crying.

Someone was crying for you again.

Your heart was rapidly pumping on your chest, almost knocking the breath out of you.

That's when the darkness took you and pulled you into a deep slumber.

Sehun cried as he hopped inside his car, quickly following your father's car with Chanyeol driving, heading towards the nearest hospital. His vision was slightly blurred as he drove but he didn't care.

He needs to get to you.

"You can't leave me. You can't." Sehun mumbled as he swiftly passed the stoplight, not caring about the laws at the moment. "You'll be okay. You will."

It's too short.

You've only spent 2 months with him, that's unfair.

He wants to spend the rest of his life with you but he knows that's not possible now.

Sehun's heart was aching as he ran towards the emergency room, his fists colliding with the glass as the doctors took you away. Chanyeol grabbed his best friend to refrain him from causing a commotion despite Sehun's struggles.

"Sehun!" Chanyeol shouted as he pushed his best friend away from the glass door. "Stop!"

"She'll be okay, right? She will be, right?!" Sehun panted like he ran for miles when he's just keeping the painful cry come out from his throat. "Tell me!"

Chanyeol's cheeks were tainted with his own tears but he managed to look strong and okay when he's really breaking down inside.

"She will be okay, Sehun. Noona's strong." Chanyeol nodded as if he's convincing himself instead of his best friend. "It's not time yet."

Your mother stood up from her seat and went to the weeping boy.

"Sehun-ah, let's just calm down and sit, okay? Yeoreum won't be happy to see you like this when she gets out of there." Ga-in smiled as if tears weren't flowing down her cheeks. Sehun stared into her eyes and nodded, letting your mother lead him to the bench, where your sister and her friends with Dasom sat, crying as they comforted each other.

Your father was inside the emergency room with the other doctors, checking your condition bravely as if he's not breaking too.

"Now, all we can do is wait and pray." Ga-in clasped her hands together as she closed her eyes. "It's too early for her to leave." She whispered, her voice hoarse and in pain.

Sehun propped his elbows on his knees as he place his hands on his face. Chanyeol sat beside him, leaning his head back on the wall with a sniff.

They were all thinking of the same thing.

Please let her be okay.

—

Fluffy’s note: I don't know if it's heartbreaking enough but well, 😪 I'm saving the best for last. 😏 I really cried when I was writing the last part before, I don't know I'm just emotional, I guess. 😭 I'm sorry if I made your heart flutter in the clouds and dropped it in a second. Don't worry, I'll pay for it. 😭👍🏻

#WillYouLiveOrDie lol 😂

#MyPoorBabySehun 😭

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❥ Ch.25