#please ignore all my many perspective crimes and my badly planned buildings no I did not use references this was meant to be a quick comic | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ayasachikokeiki13-blog · 7 years

Text

This quote I am rewriting a bit..

In the highest civilization the "book" is still the highest delight. Many who have once seen beyond the sky and beyond this world will understand why I chose a circle. - Ralph Waldo Emerson I do not enjoy people coming around to daily and often analyze, dislike, shame, or threaten me about me or the way I live. Like. Come over cause you like my little world and wanna see what I came up with now and make cool things together and tell me all about your self while I draw impressions in the shade of your spirit as it makes it's expressions through your presence and we enjoy each others company as mutuals. If you got a bad word for me, get in line with every other hate figure and leave me alone cause I am not your problem if you don't personally know me in the flesh. I am thrilled and joyous if you do want to know me because I would love to have a positive person in my life to smile with instead of fight. Where are you best friend... Arrive soon please. Granted my skin gets thicker and I get older and wiser to him getting sicker but I don't want it to be that way so if you wanna be friends with me and go on stoney rolls.. Please, come by with your joy and share your perspective with me because I love learning.. And I'll share yours by enjoying it. And if you want to know me, be straight forward and light hearted. Know when it's personal and dark it's my serious subjects and if I don't wanna break open that latch, let me keep it closed so I can let it cease to exist or have any meaning to me. Verily. World. You may see me. But I may not see you or even understand shit about this weird life of hashtag and anime reference to hide sometimes very bad intentions. Like drugs shots seizures safety nurse some fucker who wants to be my sensei standing over me like a prize deer hunt kill. And I am awake enough to make out your hunger and your shaking hands, clenched teeth, and hard on just hatching as I start getting sleepy. You don't like it when they struggle. I'd rather you actually liked me and we played a game to get that obligation if necessary over with and I wanna be awake. And I want you to feel every rip and tear and see it all in live action pain and serious personal will power as you pass me to no. 2 or whoever decides to join you and you defile me at my own school in my own Hood, in my own city, for no legitimate reason other than revenge because I don't count colours as things that can command me in anyway. I will let you see the real me get your vengeance.. Thats my parting gift cause if you drug me. Or shoot me or gang rape me or beat me or use me as your status puppet ever again, you will get what you never got before. Your 'illuminated rights' of manhood by defiling a random girl for her disowned fathers crimes who she is not even related to either syndicate. K I'm a whole other fate that would have happened if Bryan wasn't such a. Freak about my not liking him cause I loved a girl... Like. Woah. Big fucking deal. Rape me straight? Cool. Rape me gay. Already did that. Rape me nonbinary? I have a kill switch. And I will used it if I feel like it. And if you smile or laugh or thrust violently with pleasure at my pain, we're going full connect and k. O. Buddy here's where you dumped all your feelings. Thus here's what you we're lacking with your no. 9 mask hiding an 11 personality. Andrew is why I think there is even a chance for you to get better.. He's your worst enemy And you should be mine.. But we relate and andrew doesn't. Suffer together in hate and despair and we can leave this world whole or die happy. Turn your persona roboto which is sociopathy defense mechanism that hides the real you like Alice. And the real you is scary.. But understood and caring in your sadism cause you like hurting me. You could have just said that out loud and when. I would have adapted. Cause I like blood and blades and bites and play fights and ferocity with mellow controlled power trip tortuous turn ons that escalate and build. But that's cause I Enjoy challenges and skilled manipulators that will kill people to keep you to themselves. Lmfao except seriously. Read this baked asf and happy and warm and relaxed like you just xxxdreampt your wish for your unspoken side with me. That's happy. You don't Yet know. . But you are learning. You are lazy and arrogant and a cocky prideful fuck. Your temper with me is instaflame and I like it hot so turn it up. But you better be in your good place when you burn me cause it should be a willing submission to be marked by someone and a willing submission to change to half spirit so I feel not only empathy and your pleasure in harm, but also my pleasure in curing and refining my body to someone I love. I learn to fit you and that's ssomething we never got to share. Mind to mind or otherwise. We we're mirrors to each other online always, and still are. But when you punish pleasure with pleasure you win. And so do I. Give into the sickness of insanity in psychopathy that you have the ability to rhizome people with, and void walker you fucked up andrew. .. Try me and I'll chop off your fingers. That will be called ichi That's the me in me you left you with. Your own weak or more pure innocence is inside me. You made me care so much you can't handle me anymore cause I am your patchwork faded project that died several times and has since grown flesh n blood and that same fight you taught me long ago. And the codes all broke so it's just unpredictable. The cool part is that I choose to play along or not and usually I enjoy every second. It's so personal it's creepy and kindof wicked. And I enjoy that. Which is why yandere. I like creepy yeha and erotic gore Andrew doesn't like me. He likes his ideal of me. And his Enthronement and worship and adoration as prince king of himself and your heart. I don't like humiliation or segregation or shaming or emotional vampirism.. Or arrogance or Machiavellianism or spoons or hypnotism.. No blending. No blind. no blindness here. I see you clear. I accept you but I don't accept you taking advantage of sleeping women at parties, or black outs.. Or bitches Cause you got issues. Work them out where you are safe and then just be your new self. All self made.. You will then have to stay un rapey for the rest of your life. You are no king by slaughtering lamb in an open field. You only become a true man when you learn self respect and that is what you move to greet people with and you are able to learn and Master a woman who is broken so badly only a master magician could fix her.. Then youd actually have good deed status kingship and it feels good to be a hero for someone who loves you. Because you start to feel again and it's happiness. Like you never felt before. The whole world opens up to you when you can enjoy and are mindfully mindful of every choice you make to be happy and better for yourself and your surprise equal. Sigh. This could be so far.. Anyone I am talking to my past.. And I find madmen of fear to be a waste of energy. And madmen of anger trite and bad for representing your species.. And often repressed and disturbing and at best sly and willing to adventure.. But a man of pain wants gain? And to feel good doing it? Win it. Win your worth by being good and you can make that last forever. Especially with a killer in your bedroom. A woman who can love you freely cause you let her try to please you cause she wants to. For her own enjoyment and yours cause you earned rewards and witches love granting wishes and you return the sensation of fulfillment in only positives as a standard of living to strive for constantly. In every way. Which is why I thought I would be blunt about my sexuality because no one remembers me anymore. And I am not asking for a boy to nurture or pet or spoil like before. I want a man I trust enough to take me to the edge of everything and back with intense and sensitive sensory overload. And a man who enjoys and respects me as a human being enough to be safe with me to the best of their ability.. No more boys though only slightly younger. I was dead before you got to high school. So. Pissy men's moods of disrespect towards me are just ugly. And disagreeable and my temper and tolerance is so short. Damn. You assumed so many false things about me you really did forget so much you forgot into ignorance and spite and paranoia and.. I did that before. It's not interesting. Nor is it worth my time. But if someone had let me love them for real for they were fearless and believed in their own strength and spirit... They werent afraid of love Cause they came with no expectations or assumptions or preconceived thots or biases or socially promoted hate.. Or trickster plans to profit behind my back.. Unacceptable. Being mean to me cause you have a serious unwillingness to help yourself and so I become your anger and distaste outlet for yourself and anything else.. Unacceptable. I give the want to be "tegan with the skeleton key" andrew, three arguments til i ask you to move away. Remember that. Three. Casino is on strike three of living at all Andrew is on his ever last chance of my love which is.. A first. And other people are into me so.. Earn good things for yourself and of we decide to play love making, make it lovely. And make me rapturous. Cause I share highs. And leave it at that.. Enrapture a loyal woman who is happy on her own. You actually win a real life crown. It's called mad. Respect. Across the land for recovering by making ammends to the person you hurt worst in the world and you we're so into being there in that raising high with that warmth all around you called acceptance and adoration... Via your action.. In passion. Erase your guilty mind with heavenly times in the noble pursuit of cleaning that part of your brain with better way better ideas and sensations.. And then your life with yourself will bloom and you will be redeeming yourself as a human being.. Maybe just enough to have a choice to try again or be obliterated instead of still dealing with these long paragraphs filled with physical emotion I cannot summarize with words. And the hell that could await you is not a good one.. And you never get out.

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