#problemnyatic thoughts

[problemnyatic]

"Punishment works!!!" We're drowning in three to four generations of people so pants-shittingly terrified of ever being wrong that half of everyone has constructed a worldview wherein they never even consider the possibility that they could be wrong and the other half behaves like one wrong move will make anything or anyone explode violently into a million irreperable pieces. I don't think it works guys

[snow-chan]

I'm sure OP didn't mean anything bad in writing their post (so this is not an attack on their person), but this framing of the topic seriously rubbed me the wrong way for a handful of reasons.

That said, here are some opposing viewpoint additions that I enjoyed/agreed with:

@junk-food-forever @bimbo-apocalypse @jasperwocky @problemnyatic @miguels-mistress @callie-flower @paradoxspaceheater @keriarentikal 's contributions are more my speed to be honest. Thank you for collectively summing up my thoughts so well!

nothing but respect for our troops (smut writers) but listen. i dont want to be the person to tell you this, but not every character is going to be a dom or a sub. some people. and i know this is hard to hear. but some people do have vanilla sex. and some of those people might even be The Character.

[capacitivemetamorph]

Well I'd hoped there'd have been asks to go along with the interest but I suppose this makes sense. I'll get around to spicing things up and getting you all food for thought. For what it's worth, this blog is all "in character" in that I am literally the one running this blog. If anything, problemnyatic is more of a made up persona than I am ;p

[problemnyatic]

The high's starting to wear off. Someone shoot another billionaire CEO

[problemnyatic]

"I would kill for you. I would die for you" would you take a break for me? Would you sit down and rest? For a day, a week, a year? Would you let others take care of your needs for me? Would you let yourself be held for me? By me?

[problemnyatic]

I don't know who needs to hear this but please please please please please explore the settings. Of your phone, computer, of every app you use. Investigate the UI, toggle some things around and see what happens. You won't break anything irreperably without a confirmation box asking you if you really mean to do that thing. And you can just look up what a setting will do before touching it if you're really worried ok?

Worst case scenario you just have to change the settings back if you don't like what happened but it is so so so important to explore the tools available to you and gain a better understanding for how the stuff you use works.

Even if you already know. Even if you're comfortable with how you use it now. You don't just have to accept whtever experience has been handed to you by default and it's good for you to at least know what's available to you.

[problemnyatic]

so do I send this to photomatt

[problemnyatic]

funny how predstrogen got full-nuked right as a lot of discussions about transmisogyny started getting widespread. trans women start talking about our hurt and it gets us removed from our spaces. goddamn incredible.

[problemnyatic]

"I think this Category of human being is disposable" okay that not only sucks and is fascist but also makes getting you to deem someone to be disposable a simple matter of convincing you they're in The Category regardless of the truth. Also The Category is often misapplied to a vulnerable minority because it makes people like you agree they're disposable.

"Anyone who disagrees with me about The Category of people being disposable is a Category apologist or probably also in The Category themselves" Oh so you're just totally unconcerned with truth or justice or ethics or human rights and just are feeding your bloodlust for the sake of revenge fantasies. got it 👍

[problemnyatic]

Also any words an oppressed group uses to self identify will be made into slurs because the part that makes a word slur material to oppressors is the connotation of being associated with the minority group. Trying to take useful language away from oppressed folks because our oppressors use it as a slur is like saying "Drinking water is an endorsement of hurricanes."

We won't stop our oppressors from oppressing us or using slurs by limiting our words. We stop them by fighting back. Taking away the power of their slurs by reclaiming them is a way we fight back. Stop fighting for their hate to have power over us. Stop fighting to give our words away to our oppressors.

What is or isn’t a slur can be highly contextual, y'all.

“Jonny Sims bummed a fag off my ma” doesn’t contain a slur, but “What are you, some kind of fag?” does.

“Queer studies”, “the queer community” and “I’m queer”? Not a slur. Some bigot calling you a “dirty queer”? Slur.

“Be gay, do crimes” and “He’s gay” ≠ slur, but “Ew, that’s so gay” = slur.

In conclusion, stop buying into this fucking “q slur” bullshit. Queer people talking about the queer community aren’t using it as a slur any more than a gay man calling himself gay is using that term as a slur.

[problemnyatic]

scruffy girls

[problemnyatic]

"xyz DNI" blocking people is YOUR job, sorry. You cannot ask the world to simply move around you, you have to take control of your online experience or you will be fucking miserable forever. Most people don't read your bio/pinned/carrd before touching the posts that cross their dash anyways.

Also maybe worry less about if someone who likes something you hate clicks on your tumblr post. I promise it is not that fucking serious.

Also-also if you have this DNI because your friends/moots said or implied you have to otherwise you're somehow Bad and/or will be punished by them if you don't, that's kind of fucked and maybe you need less controlling friends.

[problemnyatic]

If you can't cope with the reality of having been wrong, done something wrong, or hurt someone without melting down or having a crisis, you're not safe for anyone to be around, btw. Fucking up is an inevitability of being alive. You literally need need to learn to handle situations in which your actions caused someone else to be hurt, because this is never going to be a thing that just stops happening. Being able to just be wrong, or misinformed, or ignorant, or straight up the one who committed an unforced error to others' detriment while maintaining at least a thin veneer of decorum and reasonability is not optional.

You're not owed forgiveness by others, but you need to learn how to forgive yourself for running afoul of your own value system, otherwise you will render yourself incapable of internalizing when you actually have, thus rendering the value system itself utterly useless at guiding your behaviors, and rendering you effectively devoid of one, besides "I'm never wrong, I'm never the bad guy," I guess. And I'm sure you don't need me to explain how that can only go horrifically, catastrophically wrong.

[problemnyatic]

if any tumblr staffer is watching staff tear through the userbase and feels suuuper guilty and complicit now would be an awesome time to anonymously leak what things are like over there to the public. I super mega promise you'll be a better person for it and stuff

[problemnyatic]

executive dysfunction really is a complete fucking nightmare. all the decisions you could make, but you won't. All the things you know you should do, you want to do, but you won't. Yeah yeah we all know it's a symptom but it feels and looks like just.... deciding not to be responsible.

It's easier not to, so i guess I just won't. I promise it's not laziness, I swear. It's not me just giving up on things that affect more than just me, I swear. Maybe if I say it enough I could hope to believe it myself.

[problemnyatic]