#rational feelings & doesn’t turn into a jealous idiot over an unrequited crush
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I don’t want to have to start a whole new journal because of this man but genuinely there’s no other way to get these thoughts out
#like i can talk about some of it on here but not without destroying my credibility or my image of somebody who is an adult with somewhat#rational feelings & doesn’t turn into a jealous idiot over an unrequited crush#i also can’t go into all the details because some of it is too insane. not concerning as such. but insane#and i can’t tell my friends because they don’t want to hear about it#like it would take way too many paragraphs to get all that shit out#and i can’t tell my mom because she has no feelings or sentimentality so she just wouldn’t get it and would outright tell me i was stupid#and hurt my feelings#so. i was hoping to use this new notebook for a novel i’m plotting. but fuck it#i feel like journalling would help me just in general tbh. and who says i can’t also plot stories into it#i did that with the journal i kept in america… i’d occasionally stop narrating my day and just randomly write 2-4 pages of some random wip#so yeah. that.#personal
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