Cut to Sarge, Simmons and Donut roaming the vast underground cave
Simmons: Come on, Grif should be right over here.
Donut: Don't listen to him Sarge, he's just tryin' to score more drugs to keep his habit alive! Remember last month when he asked for more money? It was for drugs!
Sarge: That was part of a budgetary meeting, Donut! He needed more funds for vehicle maintenance.
Donut: Enabler!
Simmons: I see something.
Sarge: Ah! There's my shotgun! Mission accomplished, excellent work men!
Sarge picks up his shotgun.
Sarge: Let's hang up a banner.
Donut: There's Grif.
Sarge: Oh right, and Grif. Excellent- somethinerother, you... peopl- why do I even bother.
Grif: (moans) What happened? What'd you do to me?
Simmons: We got knocked the fuck out, and the people who did it must have taken you.
Grif: Oh, right. Uh, they kept askin' me questions. They wanted information.
Sarge: Information- what did they-
Simmons: Whoa, whoa, whoa, they wanted information and they took you? Why wouldn't they take me?
Sarge: What did they look like?
Simmons: Sarge, please! I was right there next to you. If they needed information, why would they take you instead of me?
Grif: What're you, jealous? Geez!
Simmons: No, I just think if you're gonna drug and torture people, you don't need to insult their intelligence too. That's just mean.
Grif: Yeah, you're jealous.
Sarge: Besides, takin' all the fun outta interrogating.
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Monochrome Magic: Rawdah Mohammed Dazzles in Red at the 77th Cannes Film Festival
Monochrome Magic: Rawdah Mohammed Dazzles in Red at the 77th Cannes Film Festival
Only the brave and uber-stylish can successfully pull off an all-red look on the red carpet. Norwegian-Somali model, blogger, healthcare professional, and activist Rawdah Mohammed proved she’s one such fashion icon as she rocked a fiery red ensemble for the premiere of “Marcello Mio” at the 77th annual Cannes Film Festival.
A Bold Monochrome Statement
Rawdah’s striking outfit, crafted by…
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brings out red & mutes everything else. looks best with images where red is not the primary color.
made in photoshop cc - results may be slightly different on photopea/etc. make your own adjustments as necessary.
♡ / ↺ to use, credit appreciated.
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imagine being the ferris wheel attendant in the carnival job. like you're an underpaid college student working minimum wage and there's this angry-looking russian guy manspreading all over the bench that looks kind of like jesse eisenburg in the first now you see me movie that just keeps riding the wheel. like he's being really fucking intense about it. it's been ten times already and he doesn't look like he's getting off any time soon and frankly you're not getting paid enough for this so to hell with it just send him around again.
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Cut to Sarge in front of the ship
Sarge: Quit yer yammerin'. Let's see if we can get this thing movin'. I was thinkin' about our discussion earlier, and a-
Simmons: And you decided to use one of my ideas?
Sarge: Course not! I've got a new much more realistic plan for lifting the ship. If Donut is underneath, all we need to do is enrage him to the point where he can lift the ship and our work is done. Now quick, help me think. What would make Donut furious?
Grif: I don't know, have you tried sharing your plan with him? That'd probably do it.
Sarge: Hey Donut! I was back at the base reading some of your fashion mags - they said that pink is no longer the new black! Turns out black is the new black, and pink is the old black. Which is now white! And it's after Labor Day, you know what that means -
Grif: Oh dear God.
Sarge: Also we needed to do some minor rust repairs on the Warthog's drive train. The bad news is that the only lubricants I could find were your imported hand creams! The good news is, the jeep now smells like lilacs. Rusty metal lilacs.
Grif: This has got to be th-
Sarge: This doesn't seem to be working. Alright, time for Plan B.
Simmons: Break in to the ship, and see if we can raise it-
Sarge: No, Plan B is to try to induce super powers in Grif. Simmons, get my jar of radioactive spiders out of the Warthog. Come here Grif, I need to borrow your neck.
A loud metallic creaking comes from the ship
Grif: Did you just hear that?
Sarge: Mayor of Burbank! Plan A is working! Quick Grif - get me a list of the latst celebrity break-ups! Simmons, help me out!
Simmons: Hey Donut! I hear they cancelled daytime television.
Sarge: Hey Donut! Command called. They rejected your new definition for fire in the hole. They're gonna stick with the old one.
Simmons: Oh Donut! I heard that the Winter Olympics is gonna focus even more on snowboarding next time.
Grif: I can't take this. I'm gonna go watch some football.
Sarge: Grif's been using your paisley thong as a slingshot!
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