#rick's hairstyle in this episode troubles me

[geetimesthree]

"possession is nine tenths of my ass!"

Bonus: Memory Rick and his sculptures

[claudia1829things]

"ONCE UPON A TIME . . . IN HOLLYWOOD" (2019) Review

"ONCE UPON A TIME . . . IN HOLLYWOOD" (2019) Review When I had first learned that producer-director Quentin Tarantino had plans to make a movie about "Old Hollywood", I assumed that it would be set during the early 20th century - at least sometime between the 1920s and the 1940s. I had no idea that the movie would be set near the end of the 1960s.

The reason behind my initial assumption was that I have never considered the 1960s decade to be a part of . . . "Old Hollywood". For me, that era in film history had ended by the late 1950s. I eventually learned that a good number of movie stars - Rock Hudson being one of them - had retained contracts with the industries movie studios even during the Sixties. Even those who had transferred from movie to television productions. Then . . . I heard that the movie would be about the LaBianca-Tate Murders from August 1969. Familiar with the level of violence featured in past Tarantino movies, I was pretty determined to avoid this movie. I am used to the violence featured in the director's past movies. But I really could not see myself sitting in a movie theater and watching a re-creation of the murder of actress Sharon Tate, Hollywood hairdresser Jay Sebring and a few other friends at the hands of Charles Manson's Family. I had seen the 1976 movie, "HELTER SKELTER" when I was a kid. Once was enough and that was only a two-part television movie. But when I had eventually learned that "ONCE UPON A TIME . . . IN HOLLYWOOD" was a revisionist movie like his 2009 film, "INGLORIOUS BASTERDS", I decided to give it a chance. "ONCE UPON A TIME . . . IN HOLLYWOOD" covered a six month period near the end of the 1960s - from February to August 1969. To be honest, the movie is divided into two time periods. Two-thirds of the movie is set during a 36-hour period in early Februrary 1969. The last third of the film is set during the afternoon and evening hours of August 8-9, 1969. The movie is about the experiences of two men - Hollywood television actor Rick Dalton and his friend/stunt man/chauffeur Cliff Booth. Following the cancellation of his television series, "Bounty Law", Rick had been making guest appearances in various television shows as villains. Casting agent Marvin Schwarz warns Rick that the longer he continues appearing in television episodes as the villain, his career will eventually die and no one will remember him from "Bounty Law". The agent suggests that Rick consider going to Europe to star in an Italian western or two. And Cliff find his career as a Hollywood stuntman over due to rumors that he may have killed his wife and an altercation with Bruce Lee on the set of "THE GREEN HORNET". Only his job as Rick's chauffeur/handyman has allowed Cliff to earn any cash, thanks to the actor's alcoholism and collection of DUIs that led to the removal his driver's license. Rick has also acquired new neighbors - Polish-born director Roman Polanski and his actress wife Sharon Tate - both with Hollywood careers that seemed to be on the upswing. The couple had just began leasing the home of music producer Terry Melcher. Rick has dreams of befriending them as a means to revive his career. Meanwhile, he contemplates accepting Marvin's suggestion, while he begins work on his current job - a guest appearance as another villain in the pilot episode of the TV western called "LANCER". As for Cliff, he becomes acquainted with a beautiful hitchhiker named Pussycat. She turns out to be a member of the Manson Family, who are staying at Spahn Ranch, where he and Rick used to film "Bounty Law". Cliff's encounter with the ranch's owner, the blind and aging George Spahn and members of the Manson Family foreshadows a later encounter on that infamous night, six months later. While contemplating his career, I noticed all of the four movies made by Quentin Tarantino in the past ten years were period pieces. All of them . . . from "INGLORIOUS BASTERDS" to this current film, "ONCE UPON A TIME . . . IN HOLLYWOOD". I would never consider the other three films as nostalgic, but a part of me cannot help but wonder if I could say the same about this latest one. The pacing for "ONCE UPON A TIME . . . IN HOLLYWOOD" struck me as a lot more detailed, relaxed and reflective than any of his previous movies. It almost seemed as if Tarantino was paying some kind of loving tribute to the end of the old Hollywood studio system. For me, this seemed like both a good thing and a bad one. Tarantino always had a reputation for scenes that featured long stretches of dialogue or detailed action sequences. And yes, the pacing in his films - with the exception of scenes featuring action or revelations of previous mysteries - can be a tad slow upon first viewing. But "ONCE UPON A TIME . . . IN HOLLYWOOD" marked the first time I can recall such a small amount of violence or action. Tarantino seemed more evoking a sense of the past than in any other of his period films. For "ONCE UPON A TIME . . . IN HOLLYWOOD", it was a good thing for the film managed to permeate the end of the 1960s in Los Angeles and the Hollywood Studio system thanks to Tarantino's direction, Barbara Ling's superb production designs, Arianne Phillips' costume designs and the art direction led by Richard L. Johnson. On the other hand, Tarantino's in-depth peek into Los Angeles 1969 also had a negative impact . . . a minor one, if I must be honest. This slow exploration also included a look into actress Sharon Tate's life . . . at least in the first two-thirds of the film. Basically, the movie reflected a peek into the daily life of the actress - attending a party at Hugh Hefner's Playboy mansion, visiting a bookstore in the Westwood Village, and watching her latest film ("THE WRECKING CREW") at the theater. I realize that Tarantino was trying to pay some kind of homage to Tate, but I found this . . . homage rather dragged the film's pacing. There were two other aspects of "ONCE UPON A TIME . . . IN HOLLYWOOD" that I found troubling. One brief scene early in the film featured an appearance by Charles Manson at the Polanski-Tate home, searching for music producer Terry Melcher, who owned it. In real life, Manson had visited the house on several occasions, searching for the music producer. These visits had led to the Tate-LaBianca murders. But the movie only featured one visit by Manson and it happened early in the film . . . six months before the night of August 8-9. I believe this is where Tarantino's narrative structure for the film had failed. I belief the film's second act, which is set during that very night, should have began at least a few days or a week or two earlier, allowing one or two more visits by Manson to 10050 Cielo Drive and setting up his plan to send some of his followers to kill its inhabitants. And there was Cliff's infamous fight with Bruce Lee that outraged a good number of critics and moviegoers and led them to accuse Tarantino of disrespct toward the actor/martial artist and racism. Many took umbrage at Tarantino's portrayal of Lee as a braggadocio who needed to be taken down by a white man in a fight - namely Cliff. If I must honest, I felt the same. I still do . . . somewhat. I recently discovered that one of the production companies backing the film is Bona Film Group, a Chinese organization controlled by Yu Dong and Jeffrey Chan. As producers and co-financiers of the film, why did Bona Film Group fail to protest against the Booth-Lee encounter? Did the company's executives have a personal grudge against the late martial artist? Was this lack of protest due to some unpopularity of Lee in mainland China? Or did the production company simply not cared? One minor nitpick . . . actor Mike Moh's hairstyle for Lee was a bit too long for that 1966 or 1967 flashback. Personally, I think Tarantino should have never added that scene in the first place. It was not that relevant to the film's overall narrative. Or he could have easily allowed Cliff to have a fight with a fictional character, instead of Lee . . . anything to avoid the unnecessary controversy that followed. Despite these flaws, I really enjoyed "ONCE UPON A TIME . . . IN HOLLYWOOD". As I had stated earlier, I really enjoyed the film's atmospheric setting of the Hollywood community at the end of the 1960s. The movie also did an excellent job in conveying Tarantino's talent for creating a narrative structure for his films. The director allowed moviegoers a peak into a Hollywood industry that was in the process of change from the old studio system to the industry's American New Wave era between the mid-1960s and the early 1980s. This transistion was conveyed in the film not only marked by Rick Dalton's anxiety over his foundering career, but also capped by the Manson Family's attack upon Cielo Drive. However, Rick was not the only one anxious about his future. Cliff Booth faced professional oblivion following Rick's marriage to an Italian actress in the film's second half. Despite their close relationship, Rick made it obvious that he could not afford to keep Cliff in his employ. The night of August 8-9 was supposed to be his last night in Rick's employ. What is also interesting about this film is that like "THE HATEFUL EIGHT", it ended on an ambiguous note. Was Rick's career ever salvaged? Also, many have forgotten that on the following evening, Charles Manson himself led a second attack upon Leno and Rosemary LaBianca in Los Angeles' Los Feliz neighborhood. Did the revisionist ending of "ONCE UPON A TIME . . . IN HOLLYWOOD" prevent these murders? I wonder. The movie also featured many sequences that I found very enjoyable to watch. They also help set up and maintain the film's narrative. These scenes included Marvin Schwarz's frank assessment of Rick's career, Polanski and Tate's appearance at a Playboy Mansion party, Rick's delightful interactions with an eight year-old actress named Trudi Fraser on the "LANCER" set that helped him turn in a memorable performance, Rick's breakdown in a trailer after flubbing his lines, and Cliff's meeting with Pussycat. But there were two scenes that really stood out for me. One of those scenes were Cliff's encounter with the Manson family at Spahn's Ranch seemed like Tarantino's take on what happened between "the family" and a stuntman named Donald Shea in late August 1969. I thought Tarantino did a superb job with this scene. It was well-paced, filled with a great deal of tension. I can say the same about the movie's last sequence that featured the Manson Family's attack upon Cielo Drive during the night of August 8-9. This is where Tarantino' use of historical revision came into play. The director-writer used Rick's constant complaints about "hippies", his celebrity as a former television star and Cliff's previous encounter with the Manson Family to re-direct the latter's attack from the Polanski-Tate household to the Dalton household. And what unfolded was chaotic, occasionally funny and yes, very scary. It truly was a well shot and well-acted sequence. "ONCE UPON A TIME . . . IN HOLLYWOOD" featured a good deal of cameos - probably a lot more than any previous Tarantino film (I could be wrong, since I have not seen all of his films). Making solid cameos were Damian Lewis, Michael Madsen, Timothy Olyphant (as actor James Stacy), Luke Perry (as actor Wayne Maunder), Damon Herriman (as Charles Manson), Ramón Franco, Lena Durnham, Rumer Willis, Martin Kove, Clu Galagher, Rebecca Gayheart, Brenda Vaccaro, Scoot McNairy, Clifton Collins, Jr., James Remar, and Toni Basil. The movie also featured some very memorable supporting performances - especially from the likes of Al Pacino, who delightfully portrayed casting agent Marvin Schwarz; an entertaining Kurt Russell who not only portrayed stunt gaffer Randy Miller, but also served as the film's narrator; Zoë Bell, who was equally entertaining as Randy's stunt gaffer wife Janet; Mike Moh, who gave a colorful performance as Bruce Lee; Lorenza Izzo, as Rick's wife Francesca Capucci; a rather frightening Dakota Fanning as Lynette "Squeaky" Fromme, Manson family member; Maya Hawke as "Flower Child"; Nicholas Hammond as actor-director Sam Wanamaker; Rafał Zawierucha as Roman Polanski; Julia Butters as the delightful child actor Trudi Fraser; a very charming Emile Hirsch as Jay Sebring; the always entertaining Bruce Dern as George Spahn; and Margaret Qualley, who was very memorable as Manson Family member "Pussycat". I will be the first admit that Tarantino made little use of Sharon Tate in this film. It was quite clear that her presence really served as a catalyst for Tarantino's story and possibly a muse. But I cannot deny that Margot Robbie gave a very charming and ellubient performance as the late actress. Brad Pitt, on the other hand, gave a very subtle yet memorable performance as former stuntman Cliff Booth, whose career had seen better days. This was due to the mysterious circumstances behind the death of Cliff's wife. Many believe he may have killed her and got away with the crime. And Pitt managed to reflect this ambiguity in his performance and in his eyes. There were times when it seemed there was a bit of a "cool superhero" element in the character that at times, made it a bit difficult for me to relate to him. But thanks to Pitt's natural screen persona and a very subtle performance, I was able to do so in the end. If I had to choose the most complex character in the entire movie, it would have to be former television star Rick Dalton. And I cannot deny that Leonardo DiCaprio did an exceptional job of conveying this character to the movie screen. Thanks to DiCaprio's performance and Tarantino, Rick is such a conumdrum. One could label him as one of those actors from the late 1950s and early 1960s, who became television stars and later tried to make the transition to film. I have read many comments that Rick has a conservative outlook on his tastes and acting skills that will forever limit him from becoming a star in Hollywood's New Age in films. This is very apparent in Rick's pompadour hairstyle in the film's first half, his occasional rants against hippies and his reluctant to adapt to the new Hollywood. And yet . . . Rick eventually concedes to Schwarz's suggestion that he try Italian westerns, he changes his hairstyle and wardrobe to reflect the fashions of the late 1960s and early 1970s, and he seeks to make social connections with Polanski and Tate to further his career. Rick is also an alcoholic and might be bipolar. DiCaprio did an excellent job in conveying Rick's emotional state that reflect these traits. "ONCE UPON A TIME . . . IN HOLLYWOOD" is not my favorite Quentin Tarantino film, it has became my favorite film of 2019. I do not think it has a chance of winning any of the big prizes during the awards season of 2019-2020. I have a deep suspicion that the media and the Hollywood community is not as enamoured of it as I am. Which is okay . . . to each his or her own. But damn it, the movie was superb. I have heard rumors that Tarantino plans to retire from filmmaking. Personally, I think this is a mistake on his part. Perhaps he wants to end his career on a high note. And "ONCE UPON A TIME . . . IN HOLLYWOOD" is certainly a reflection of it, thanks to Tarantino's direction, his screenplay, the movie's production values and especially the cast led by Leonardo DiCaprio and Brad Pitt. But I hope that Tarantino continues to make movies.

[andrewmoocow]

Fooly Falls 2 Ride on Shooting Star chapter 3: Beach Episodes for the Win! (originally posted on March 28, 2019)

AN: Now this is where things will get pretty deep. We already got hints of Haruko's past last chapter, plus the confirmation that she ran into Rick Sanchez at some point in that past. But that leaves the question: will there be an adaptation of FLCL Alternative set in the Rick and Morty multiverse? Who knows? ZKDW ZDV VXSSRVHG WR EH D VXQQB EHDFK GDB VRRQ EHJDQ WR ORVH LWV ZDB. RQ DQ LVODQG LW OLHV KLGGHQ VHFUHWV WKDW ZHUH PHDQW WR EH IRUELGGHQ.

Gwen's next nightmare began when she found herself walking in a single file line with tons of other unfamiliar people in an even more unfamiliar place. "M-Mama, Daddy, Tyrone?!" she asked while quietly panicking over her current situation before her location changed from the crowd to a cruddy apartment. That was when she began to hear voices. "Do you realize what you have done Haruha?!" "Who said that?" Gwen wondered in response to the invisible male's stern voice. "Look at your father when he's talking to you Haruha!" A smacking sound soon followed. "Your slacking off and playing that infernal music nearly got us all in trouble! Either behave like every other girl on this godforsaken planet or never show your face around me again!" The moment Gwen closed her eyes in fear, she next found herself on a stage with various pitch black people clearly resembling shadows with an orange head glaring at her before it began to bellow "PLANET WASPRUS, SHOW ME WHAT YOU GOT!" Gwen winced for a moment while the audience watched patiently, begging her to get on with it as if they were fearing for their lives before she noticed her shadow in the spotlight. It was still the shape of a girl, yet her facial structure and hairstyle gave away who's eyes Gwen was viewing from. "Haruko?!" She then began to hear more voices, the three present sounding even more unfamiliar. "Aw shitballs you guys, we gotta run!" the first voice belched loudly as color-coded silhouettes of a human man, a birdlike creature and a bipedal feline became more opaque. "Running from what? The Galactic Space Patrol Brotherhood, the Cromulons or Medical Mechanica?!" a second more high-pitched voice responded that sounded like a character from one of the old cartoons Soos loved. "All of the above!" "And it's not just them. Look." the final voice stoically added pointing to the sky. A gigantic red phoenix with a wingspan that encompassed the entire planet of Wasprus suddenly appeared, startling the large head. "IT SEEMS WE HAVE A SPECIAL GUEST DISQUALIFIER THIS EPISODE!" it boomed. "LEGENDARY PIRATE KING ATOMSK, SHOW US WHAT YOU GOT!" The Pirate King flapped its wings, slowly tearing the planet apart as Gwen continued staring at it. There was something majestic about the bird's appearance that made her slowly step forward. Her hair began turning pink and she started reaching out to the bird while the belching man's voice sounded once more. "Don't do it babe, that's Atomsk! His power will seriously screw with your head!" Suddenly, a chibi version of Jinyu landed right in front of her. "I tried to warn you!" she scolded in a squeaky voice. As more chibi Jinyus fell from the sky, Gwen came closer to Atomsk as it looked down on her and screeched loudly. That was what caused the girl to finally awaken with a jerk. Gwen panted quietly clinging onto her bedsheets as she looked around her and Tyrone's room. "What's with these dreams lately?" she pondered before another voice was heard, this one she could recognize from miles away. "BEACH DAY, BEACH DAY, BEACH DAY, BEACH DAY!" Tyrone excitedly burst into their room and ran around for a bit before pouncing his older sister while she continued to lay in bed. "Come on Gwen, beach day!" "Oh right." his older sister muttered. "Beach day."

"So Ezra, what do you think of my new bikini?" Leia asked Ezra showing off her school swimsuit themed two-piece. "Please just stop with this." Ezra responded turning away in embarrassment. "I have far more important things to do, like stare out into the distance." "I think that blue is really your color!" Tyrone complimented the older girl. "Though I don't see the point of the big nametag on the top." The Pines and Ramirez familes have decided on a day at Lake Gravity Falls's beach with Haruko, Jinyu and the Chius along for the ride. However Ford was not present on account on having someone over while they were having some fun in the sun. "Okay Arnold, today marks your first day of manhood!" Juan announced rubbing Arnold's shoulders while Jorge stood by with a bottle of sunscreen in hand. "One of the most important aspects of being a man is being brave around total jalapenas like Haruko over there!" As he set the stage for the lesson, Haruko laid down in a beach chair with a cold drink in hand catching some rays in a rather skimpy bikini. "Or maybe baes like Jinyu!" Jorge added pointing to the other guitar player building sandcastles with Melody, Imelda and Abby. Arnold just blinked for a bit before asking "Okay, what did you just say?" "We're workshopping new slang that I'm sure will become the talk of the town within a few days." Juan answered taking the sunscreen away from his brother to hand to the Northwest boy. "Anyway, the best way to get a girl on the beach to have the hots for you is to give them a very good applying of the good ol' sunscreen. But it's your choice bro." "You could either go for them or maybe a certain other duo." Jorge added. "Grin grin, wink wink, nudge nudge, say no more!" "I know you two have a crush on both my moms! Can you two not creep me out like that?!" Arnold yelped fumbling with the sunblock. "Hey, who's at fault for making Pacifica so extra thicc?" Juan argued before Haruko called the three boys over. "Yoo-hoo, young male friends! Does one of you want to help this jalapena put on sunscreen?" "This is your chance young grasshopper. Go to her." Jorge beckoned their student in manliness. As the two boys proudly watched him awkwardly step forward, Stan on the other hand was stewing in his wheelchair. "Don't get a nosebleed Stanley, don't be like those old anime men who lust after any female that moves!" he commanded himself. "Don't do it, don't do it! Aw, here it comes." Thankfully for Stan, blood didn't fly out his nose. But instead, his own heart started acting up and made him fall out of the chair onto the sand. "Still better than a nosebleed." "Oh my God, Stan!" Dipper cried as he and Mabel raced to their great-uncle's side. "Are you alright?" he asked. "I'm fine Dipper, simply failed to resist looking like a horny senior." Stan answered while his speech was muffled by the sand. "Think I might need to get outta the sun for a while." "Here Grunkle Stan, just sit down with Gwen and you'll be just fine." Mabel stated guiding the con-man to a table where Gwen was sitting in the shade. "Women. Am I right Gwen?" Stan snarked to his great-great niece. "By the way, where's Ford at?" "Stanford said he'll catch up with us later." Jinyu answered appearing from behind. "He just has some business to attend to."

"So Mr. Kanda, what is your history with Raharu?" Ford asked his new friend Tsukata Kanda in his laboratory. "I remember her quite well from when I was a boy." Kanda stated. "She quite literally crashed into my life and pulled a variety of things outta me, but the only one I kept was this." The agent reached into his jacket and out of it came a small squirt gun. "A water gun? How quaint." Ford commented examining the toy. "My great-nephew and great-great niece had giant robots and guitars come out of their noggins." "Then they must be lucky. Their heads must be ripe with N.O energy for her to use." Tsukata explained. "Use to become strong enough to find the Pirate King and take him back from Medical Mechanica." "That's what I've always wondered about her ever since she first met my family." Ford added. "What's her deal with Atomsk and where did she come from? Is she even from this dimension?" "Dimension?" Kanda wondered before Ford pulled out that old photo of him with Rick. "As it turns out, she may have encountered one Rick Sanchez at some point in her life which would explain her sociopathic behavior; as Rick here is a wanted criminal across multiple universes." "So you're implying she might not be of this world?" the Department of Interstellar Immigration agent continued. "I have no idea either." Ford answered with his shoulders slumping in confusion. "But from what I've gathered, she's become more villainous since we last met. We need to keep the kids on high alert should she ever try anything funny."

"Wow, Arnie sure is taking his sweet time." Jorge commented gazing at his watch as Arnold pretty much started slowly crawling on the sand before he realized what time it was. "Hey Juan, don't you have a girlfriend coming to see us?" "Wait, when did Juan get a girlfriend?" Tyrone asked catching the twins' attention as Juan began panicking. "Beneath all that silliness, you're a sweet guy but when did that ever become a thing?" "I am terribly sorry my brotherhood of man!" Juan exclaimed nervously. "I've just nearly lost track of the time!" He then proceeded to run away from the beach at high speeds. "This way fellow knights of masculinity, follow me!" With the three boys running away followed by Arnold deciding to just give up and cower under the shade, Haruko simply shrugged. "Talk about toast not being good in milk." the Vespa Woman snarked. "Hey Gwen, wanna do it for Shaggy over there?" Dipper and Jinyu were quick to defend the younger girl from the former housekeeper's advances. "I'm fine with either you or Jinyu doing it as well, Pine Tree." the orange-haired woman added smiling, causing Dipper to turn redder than blood. Meanwhile the bus had dropped off a young girl around Juan & Jorge's age who had blue hair, a white knee-length dress, a red jewel pendant, green diamond earrings, matching hair-bow and a flower pot in her hands. "Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet my girlfriend!" Juan declared. "This is Aiko." He then lowered his voice for Aiko. "Come on sweetie, say something." "Uh, hello there. My name's Aiko and I'm dating your friend Juan here." Aiko muttered nervously before she hid her face behind her flower pot. "Haha, she's perfect!" Juan laughed pridefully. "What a beautiful lady! She doesn't drink, swear or sweat! A perfect cinnamon roll as they once referred to people like her!" "My name's Tyrone, a friend of your boyfriend. Hey, nice flower pot you got there." Tyrone introduced himself and complimented Aiko's pot. "You like gardening? I kinda like gardening too." he stated trying to find some common ground between the two. "Uh, yeah." Aiko answered. "So tell us Aiko, what made you want to date my brother?" Juan asked her as the four began walking back to the beach. "What qualities do you find attractive?" "Well I just really like him, that's all!" Aiko responded with a squeak. "Oh, I'm so embarrassed!" She hid herself behind the flower pot again making Juan laugh. "So why did you bring that flower pot here?" Tyrone asked again. "It's my emotional support plant." the flower girl answered shyly. "It may not look like it, but this was very expensive." "See, what did I tell you?! So precious!" Juan cackled loudly. "Oh don't say that Juannie, it's embarrassing!" Aiko blushed with a giggle.

Back at the beach, Jinyu had been nominated to put sunscreen on Haruko. Or so she thought, as the Vespa Woman recoiled upon feeling the solution on her back. "So oily! What SPF is this?!" she cried frantically rubbing herself. Jinyu just gazed at the bottle in her hands and read the label. "Oh, it's tanning oil." "It's what?!" Raharu shouted as her skin suddenly turned a golden tan. "Haha, oldest trick in the book!" Stan applauded with a booming laugh. "Up top!" He held up his hand for Jinyu to give him a high-five, but didn't receive any. "Come on, I just want to feel like I accomplished something with someone as a team!" Jinyu rolled her eyes and returned the high-five. "Yes!" "You're all still holding a grudge I see." Haruko commented. "Just for the past three weeks." Dipper stated scowling. "You were stalking us at Greasy's where we went out to lunch, in the streets and even in Gwen's room! This is nothing!" "You've already gotten what you wanted once before." Jinyu added. "It's time you just gave it all up. Quit it already." "No way." the Vespa Woman declared. "I need to fulfill my wish in order to fulfill my-" She was suddenly interrupted by a volleyball to the face thrown by Aiko jumping for joy while the Ramirez children, Candy, Ezra, Wendy and Mabel stood by. "How embarrassing!" The ball was tossed into the air and Haruko jumped high preparing for a spike. "ATTACK NUMBER...ichi." she shouted smacking the ball downward and crashing it into the sand, blinding everyone. "So, why don't we all call it a truce now?" she offered to Jinyu, Dipper and the Stans before joining the game. "Ready or not, I'm gonna come at you all!" "Yeesh, talk about unsubtle." Dipper snarked before the two heard Gwen approach. "That woman over there, what does she want?" Gwen wondered as they watched Haruko toss volleyballs from above at rapid fire speed. Jinyu gave her answer, as stoic as ever. "That woman's the same as me." "Who wants to go next?!" Jinyu's other half challenged making funny noises into a megaphone. "Uh Jinyu. What is it that you want?" the daughter of Dipper asked the Bel-Air driver. "I was once with someone amazing." the older woman answered. "He was big, strong, and simply amazing. With him, one could simply fly around anywhere in space and live forever. But then, he suddenly disappeared; he abandoned me." "We're talking about the bird guy, right?" Stan interjected. "I said it once, and I'll say it again: dead bird reproductive organs taste terrible!" "Not now Stan." Dipper cringed at the thought of it. "Aw come on kid, you really think I was expecting it to taste like frozen peas?!" his great-uncle complained before Jinyu cut them both off. "As I was saying, it turns out in the end I just wasn't his equal." she continued. "I'm not enough for him. At least, not by myself. And yet we still continue to look for him." "We?" Gwen asked as her father put a hand on her head. "She means Haruko sweetie." Mason stated. "Right Dipper. You chase something because you simply can't catch it. Want to touch it, but you know you can't." Jinyu responded before she turned to Gwen. "You must've experienced something like that in your life, correct?" "You're asking what I really want?" Gwen muttered in surprise. She pondered for a moment before Arnold gave an impressive receive to Tyrone, who retaliated with a spike. "All I want is for me and my family to be safe." she muttered picking up the ball after it rolled to her feet.

Throughout the rest of the day, everybody spent their fun in the sun playing volleyball, eating barbecue, smashing watermelons, surfing and building sandcastles. Even Ford joined in when he finally arrived. "The blue spring of adolescence." Haruko remarked burying Jinyu in the sand with a shovel. "Perhaps this is an extension of our friendship, delayed adolescence if you will." "I'm content with you changing your mind about our relationship." Jinyu replied barely reacting to her other half plotting to get rid of her, even as Haruko began mixing cement. "But regardless, this still doesn't mean I'll let you use any of the children for your schemes. No point in fighting anymore." "Is that so?" Haruhara wondered. "Brainwashing suppression mechanism. They took extra measures ahead of time." Julia replied. "And she's got quite the geniuses to defend her when those fail." "You mean the nerd herd?" Haruko snipped before the two women turned their attention to most of the kids and adults working together on a particularly big sandcastle. Everyone was talking about how tall they can make it, except for Gwen who was perfectly silent as she picked up a crab fawning over a gold coin in its free claw. "By the way," Jinyu spoke again as she was now trapped in a concrete cocoon. "I fail to see the fun in this." "Oop, potty emergency!" Haruko chirped leaving the Jazzmaster woman encased in stone. "When you gotta go, you gotta go! AND I'M GOING!" "You need a lift there Jinyu?" Ford asked towering over the woman, and she quietly replied with "I am perfectly fine Stanford, but thanks anyway." As the kids continued working on the sandcastle, Gwen sat under the shade with Aiko and Ezra. "So, you not gonna swim in the ocean?" Aiko asked cheerfully to the dour girl. "No, no I'm not." Gwen moaned. "Then why even go to the beach if you're not going in the water? Do you have aquaphobia or something?" Ezra commented kicking his feet up on the table. "Better question is, what about you?" the younger girl in the cap replied. "Is it because of Leia?" "W-what gave you that idea you aesaekki?!" Ezra screeched in embarrassment as his face turned redder than Gwen's hair. "I don't know, you just seemed to blush at her swimsuit." Gwen remarked with a barely visible smirk. "Speaking of which, why didn't you bring yours Aiko?" "'Scuse me? That's just what Juan and I didn't agree to." Aiko grinned much to the two's confusion.

As the sun began to set, Juan & Jorge taught Arnold how to make a campfire while Aiko watched, Ian, Leia & Tyrone skipped stones, Ezra sat on a rock by himself and Imelda was getting ready to put Abby to bed. Meanwhile the adults chatted while Jinyu remained trapped in dry cement, with the waves gently taking her off the sand. "So now I have to use these sticks?" Arnold asked trying to light a fire with a pair of twigs. "Exactly my boy! You've been paying attention!" Juan exclaimed as their student in manliness rigorously rubbed the wood together to create a few sparks. "Hey, I'm doing it!" "You're doing amazing sweetie." Jorge congratulated Arnold before the sparks became a full ember. "Woohoo! Hey Aiko, over here!" Juan called to his girlfriend. "Do you think it's cool how much we've taught him?!" The flower pot girl beamed brightly before Dipper stepped toward the three boys. "Hey kids, have you seen Gwen anywhere?" "Beats me. And Haruko is gone too." Jorge responded. "Well, what are we waiting for? Let's go find her!" Arnold shouted racing up and down the shore in search of his cousin. "Wait, Gwen is gone?!" Tyrone added just as concerned for his older sister. "We have to find her before nightfall. I'm getting worried sick." Dipper announced alerting everyone on the beach to the current situation. After an hour of searching, they regrouped at the table with no success. "Where could Gwen be?" Candy asked. "She couldn't have gone far, but we combed every last centimeter of the beach." Ford stated. "Then there's only one place left on this lake that we haven't touched yet," Stan theorized. "And that's Scuttlebutt Island." "Or as Mabel and I call it, Butt Island!" Soos interjected. "Oh you scallywag!" Mabel giggled. "Uh, excuse me." Aiko squeaked. "I still need to get home. Can someone walk me to the bus?" "Why I'd be Patrick Stewart to milady!" Juan politely exclaimed taking his girlfriend by the hand. "Aw, that's my little gentleman." Melody said grinning. "But on an unrelated note, how are we going to get there?" "I think I've got a plan guys." Jorge announced adjusting his sunglasses. "It's time to set sail on the SS Cool Dude II!" At the bus station, Aiko dropped her timid facade for a more harsh and stingy one as she said goodbye to Juan. "Just so we're clear, I'm being charged overtime! Are we clear?" she demanded. "I am terribly sorry." Juan moaned, which earned him a scoff. "Give it." "Uh, here." Juan whimpered handing Aiko a wad of dollar bills. When she snatched it, all the Ramirez boy got in return was her flower pot. "So, was the character I created to your liking?" Aiko asked examining her earnings. "Oh yes, positively adorable!" Juan answered excitedly before the driver announced the bus's oncoming departure. "Okay, all there." the girl stated hopping onboard. "You boys think girls who're only shy and timid are just so precious. And by the way, the pot is yours." "Oh, uh..." Juan stuttered at the thought before Aiko switched back to her character. "A present for you!" she chirped gleefully. "Thanks Aiko! I'm gonna take good care of this-" Juan responded gratefully when he was cut off. "No. No it wasn't. Let's just say that you exchanged the envelope for that. Wouldn't want people finding out that I'm a rent-a-date." "So I bought this from you!" Juan realized as the bus began to leave. "Bye or whatever." Aiko bluntly said farewell before the vehicle drove away, leaving her fake date in the dust. The boy's train of thought went off the rails when Jorge snuck up from behind him to his shock. "Hey bro, you wanna be pirates?"

"Yo-ho, yo-ho. A pirate's life for me." Tyrone, Juan, Jorge and Leia sang onboard the SS Cool Dude II that was now captained by Ford as it left Melody, Imelda, Abby and Candy on the beach. "An insect took our friend away from her hut, look out me hearties yo-ho. And whisked her away to the island of butts, look out me hearties yo-ho." "We've just set sail and I'm already feeling seasick." Ezra groaned growing tired of the singing while he and Arnold leaned over the back of the vessel. "But we still have to find Gwen." Arnold declared trying to be bold as he was suddenly cut off. "When you were a kid, did you ever draw pictures of fireworks while watching them with your family, only for it to be too late?" "W-who's there?" Arnold yipped in shock. "Wait, Jinyu?! Where are you?" he said looking around for the woman. "Do you know where Gwen is?" "You'd try to draw every last colored speck of light. But the only way to color the night sky itself was with just a black pencil." Jinyu continued monologuing. "They lit up the dark sky so beautifully with all the colors." "What does fireworks have to do with finding Gwen?!" Ezra shouted. "All beautiful things eventually fade away." That was when Arnold reminisced on the sandcastle they all built together. Turns out Gwen put on a small smile at that time. "LAND HO! LAND HO!" Ian roared when the Cool Dude II finally reached Scuttlebutt Island. "Weigh anchor everyone!" "Well, this is it." Dipper declared dropping the boat's anchor as the crew disembarked. "Everyone needs to stay sharp. There's no telling what awaits us here." As they marched onward toward the depths of the island, Jinyu washed up on shore just as a shooting star glimmered over her. "Oh, the first star."

"So why do they say three square meals a day anyway?" Tyrone asked while the group continued exploring the Scuttlebutt woods. "A square only has four sides and I have no idea where the meal part came from?" "Last I remember, it means eating well." Pacifica replied. "That makes sense, but what do squares have to do with it?" Tyrone continued. "Quiet everyone, I hear noises!" Ford alerted putting a stop to their sojourn. The noises in question were quite unusual, ranging from beavers chittering while chainsaws roared and dinosaurs snarled. "Dinosaurs, here?" "Oh no. How hot is it today?" Mabel groaned in wonder. The dinosaur stomped closer and closer until it revealed itself as a cute little T-rex that seemed around Tyrone's height with a peculiar red plate on its back, orange boots and a large snout. "Aw! Hey there little guy!" Juan said becoming amazed at how cute the little dinosaur was before it revealed its frog-like tongue that grabbed the boy by his ankle and swallowed him whole. "HELP ME!" "Oh my God, Juan!" Soos cried out shaking the dinosaur by its torso trying to free his son. The creature relented and laid an egg with green spots patterning it that hatched to reveal a traumatized Juan. "You okay there little dude?" "I think I learned what it's like to be reincarnated. And I also learned what flavor the universe is." Juan stuttered utterly astounded at the experience as the dinosaur walked away. "Really, what was it?" Jorge asked. "It was black licorice. Yeah, we're utterly doomed." his twin brother stated. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm just gonna lie down here and contemplate on how the platypus came to be. You all go on ahead." "Where did that thing come from?" Tyrone asked. "I think I know what." Ford stated taking a knee towards a toxic waste spill. "Radioactive ooze, classic!" Stan exclaimed. "And it's not just that. Look over there!" Dipper added as a colony of beavers with chainsaws for tails emerged chittering cutely. "Sweet, chainsaw-tailed beavers!" Leia cheered becoming distracted by the little critters. "Oop, stay back sis! They do have chainsaws for tails." Ian cautioned his younger sister. "Now let's not get too distracted, cause I feel all these freaks of nature must mean we're close." "Yep, I can definitely see a Medical Mechanica factory from here." Pacifica noted turning her gaze to a giant iron nearby. "When did that show up?" Wendy asked. "I honestly have no idea. Weren't they supposed to be done with Gravity Falls when Atomsk first showed up here?" Ezra wondered. "Though I have a strong feeling we'll be proven wrong soon enough." "No turning back now. Gwen is nearby." Dipper declared stepping further into the dark island forest. "Come on guys." While the others followed, Ford stayed behind to examine the waste before putting on some protective gloves to scoop it up in a beaker. "This should be useful." he muttered.

When they finally reached the Medical Mechanica plant stationed on Scuttlebutt Island, the factory was horrendously dilapidated and a small hole was there to serve as their makeshift entrance. "Okay, here's the plan everyone." Ian announced. "Me, Leia, Dipper, Mabel, Ford, Arnold, Pacifica & Wendy are gonna go in first while the rest of you serve as lookout. This could be a bumpy ride ahead of us." "Aw come on Ian, why can't Ford be lookout while I join you guys?" Stan complained. "If you switch us, I'll let you become your dad's successor!" he tried to barter with the eldest Ramirez son, but his offer fell on deaf ears as Ian snuck in first. "Time for me to put that fencing club practice to good use. And Leia, now might be a good time to whip out all you learned from the kickboxing class Stan signed you up for." "I came prepared." Leia grinned determinedly preparing to use her sarong as a whip. "Wish us luck Grunkle Stan." Mabel said to Stan before she joined her group in exploring the factory. "Oh just you all wait, I'm gonna maim her the hardest by the story's end." he grumbled. Ian's group tiptoed into the Medical Mechanica factory watching out for any sign of Gwen. "Just gotta be quiet everyone. No sudden movements." Dipper whispered just as he began hearing the voices of two familiar girls. One voice was struggling to escape while another must've been her captor. Upon hearing the voices, Dipper scooted to the source hiding behind a pair of large doors. "Let's get to know each other better." he listened in on Haruko as his daughter continued to struggle. The father yipped in fear for her safety and began to peer through the doors to get a closer look. "Everyone, over here." he signaled for the others to group up with him. "Oh no." "Let's get to know each other better." Haruko remarked towering over Gwen in a nurse's uniform. "Please stop." the younger girl whimpered before the Vespa Woman unbuttoned the Hawaiian shirt and the shorts she had on to reveal a pink, purple and white striped one piece underneath. "Oh my, looks like someone was planning on having fun today. Now tell me, where can I hit you so you can overflow?" "Overflow? What kinda hot garbage is she on about?" Leia wondered incredulously as they felt an enraged Dipper about to break down the doors. "Oh dammit, someone help me stop Mr. Pines before he makes a huge mistake and blows our cover!" she ordered trying to hold the father back from barging in, but was too late as he kicked down the doors screaming "WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO HER RAHARU?!" Arnold on the other hand got one good look at his captive cousin and made a bright green blob creature emerge from his forehead to everyone's shock. "What, it came outta him?" Haruhara muttered as the creature slithered for a bit before it faced Arnold. "I have no idea what you're supposed to be, but let me give you one command." he said. "Go save Gwen!" Back outside the factory, the rest of the Cool Dude crew awaited their teammates' return when a loopy Juan came wobbling towards them carrying a flower pot in his hands and a strange stone shape on his back. "Oh hey bro, you're back!" Jorge cheerfully greeted his twin. "How did contemplating the universe go?" "I just paid a visit to the Garden of Eden. And the apples were terrible!" Juan exclaimed shaking his head to relieve himself of his daze while planting the stone on the ground, revealing itself to be the same one that Jinyu was trapped in. "Where'd the flower pot come from? Was it a gift from your girlfriend when she dumped you?" Stan asked the pompadour boy, who then screamed at his brother "YOU TOLD THEM YOU IDIOT?!" "I cannot tell a lie!" Jorge quoted George Washington before bringing his brother close. "But I didn't tell them she was basically a callgirl." he whispered into his ear. "That's between you and me. We can Tony Hawk about it later." "Where are the kids?" Jinyu asked Soos. "Oh yeah dude, they just ran in there after Haruko to save Gwen." the former handyman replied brightly. "I'm sure things will be all hunky-dory by sunrise."

Meanwhile in a small house back at Gravity Falls, Aiko had arrived home to her father who was reading the papers. "Hey Aiko." Masurao asked the girl. "Do you know what happened to the flower pot that was in this room?" "No clue." Aiko fibbed going upstairs, prompting suspicion from her father before he put down his tabloids & shut the door behind him, and the room gave way to reveal various machinery hooked up to a screen with the eyepatched man on it. "This is codename Eyepatch." Eyepatch said. "Do you have an update?" "Actually, I have a slight problem." Masurao proclaimed. "What is it?" Eyepatch asked. "The flower pot seems to have gone missing. What about you and the others?" the capped male replied. "Tonkichi and I are waiting for the right moment to strike. But Kanda on the other hand was able to fish info from Stanford about that motorbike chick." Eyepatch explained making a picture of Haruko mindlessly picking her nose while giving a peace sign. "If what he says is true, she's not of this world and we got an interdimensional apocalypse on the horizon."

"So what species of flower is this supposed to be?" Ezra wondered examining the pot. "Doesn't seem like anything I've researched, so I assume it's just a simple weed." Suddenly the factory behind them exploded while Haruko soared high above it with Gwen in hand and Dipper, Mabel, Tyrone & Arnold clinging onto the green creature chasing after her. With a smirk, Haruko tossed the younger girl away to smack the beast with her bass and send it flying with another hit. "Hey, leave my niece alone you creep!" Mabel shrieked clinging onto the biker's front and giving her a hard slap across the face. Haruko returned the slap and it soon devolved into the two women flailing their hands at each other as they kept falling. As for the boys, they continued grabbing hold of the green blob while it continued going after the airborne Gwen. Thankfully they were able to catch her, but she landed face-first into Arnold's chest causing her cap to react and spawn a mass of wires & metals from her forehead that roped her in and absorbed all nearby metal, even the Medical Mechanica factory. "What the hell is going on now?!" Ian shouted while he, Leia, Pacifica, Ford and Wendy evacuated just in time. "More N.O." Ford declared looking up at the giant object above them. "We have to save Gwen quick before it gets any worse!" "G-Gwen." Arnold muttered in shock at the sight before him. "Sis." Tyrone added just as worried sick. Out of complete nowhere, the flower pot made a comeback by landing on Arnold's face and making him lose his grip on the creature. Dipper & Tyrone were sent flying as well due to the shockwave until the three Pines were rescued at the last moment by Jinyu's Bel-Air. "Listen Arnold, you are the only one that can save Gwen." Julia stated from the backseat of the car. "Back here." she called to the trio lying down in her cement confinement. "So that's where you've been!" Dipper exclaimed. "Not even going to ask how you ended up like this." he added before turning to the giant hunk of metal in the sky. "So that thing's got Gwen?" "We've seen some crazy stuff since you and Haruko came into our lives, but this is the last straw!" Arnold added fiercely. "You gotta help us Jinyu, please!" "If you are unable to draw fireworks; well then," Jinyu declared. "Try shooting one in the air!" Her shades twinkled before her limbs burst from the dry concrete and she stepped onto the hood of her car. "Do it again, as many times as you need!" The Bel-Air once more turned into a mech ready for another fight. "On second thought, maybe you should be one instead!" Jinyu exclaimed folding her arms in a similar matter to a certain fusion of a pair of buster machines before tossing Arnold her bass. "Aw yeah, this is amazing!" Raharu cheered mounting onto the green creature while it waved a white flag in defeat. She smacked its butt with her Mustang to make it fly further toward the machine holding Gwen captive before spotting the Bel-Air giving chase with Arnold standing on the hood with guitar in hand. Haruko wordlessly commanded the blob to fire from one of its hoses, but the Bel-Air blocked the energy spheres and the two charged. The nurse gave the transforming car a mighty smack on the arm and chased it once more. "Cream her Arnold, make your mothers proud!" Pacifica cheered her son on before realizing that Mabel was still falling. "Oh my god, Mabel!" she cried politely helping Stan out of his wheelchair so that she can use it to catch her wife. "COMING IN HOOOOOTTTTT!" Mabel hollered descending into the seat of her grunkle's chair. "And she sticks the landing! Thank you, thank you very much!" she declared to an invisible crowd before Pacifica grabbed her face to give her a big kiss. "Knew you'd come through honey." The blob continued firing at the Bel-Air, but thankfully Arnold refused to back down while Dipper was desperate to escape. "I can't take this anymore!" he screamed lighting up three cigarettes to calm his nerves. "Are you kidding dad?! BEST BEACH DAY EVER!" Tyrone shouted excitedly. Haruko on the other hand wasn't feeling the same way as she commanded the creature to once again fire, this time at one of the automobile's rocket boosters giving her an opening. "Hah, got you now!" Then suddenly, the metallic creature roared and whipped the Bel-Air away, ejecting Dipper & Arnold from it and the latter still armed with Jinyu's guitar. This would prove the perfect chance for the son of Mabel & Pacifica to land a fatal blow upon the beast, which led to Gwen finally being revealed. "Are you okay Gwen?! Say something!" Arnold cried for his unconscious cousin. "Oh no no no no! What am I going to do now?!" "Hmph, she doesn't have enough yet." Haruko suggested having already touched down behind the two on the green blob while it deflated. "Enough of what?" Arnold asked the older woman standing over them with her bass. "A tundra? Tsun-dora? Tsundere?" Haruhara muttered to herself before making her findings clear. "She's definitely one of those people." "Just shut up already Raharu!" Dipper snarled dusting himself off after a nasty landing before racing to his daughter's side. "Please wake up Gwennie! Please!" he exclaimed clutching the girl's shoulder which made her moan. "Saying her name ain't gonna help Pine Tree, let an old friend do the heavy lifting." Haruko lifted her guitar skyward ready to bludgeon Gwen, but Arnold had finally had enough. "Leave them alone!" he shouted shoving her away with tears in his eyes. "Aw." Haruko cooed putting down her string instrument and getting close to the boy. "Then take that hat offa her." she whispered into his ear. "Go on, don't be shy. No need to worry. Your voice will reach her." "Don't do it Arnold, it's a trap!" Jinyu called dropping Mabel, Pacifica, the Stans and Tyrone from her car just in time for it to be shot down. "Leave my son alone you maniac!" Pacifica growled, but the five were too late as Haruko sat down with Arnold in her arms. "You can reach it, it's deep inside of her." she continued toying with his arm. "Why don't we do it together, kay?" Arnold gasped, realizing what was happening, and made her back off. "I don't need your help! Let me help her myself!" he shouted defiantly reaching for the bobble of Gwen's cap. "Don't do it Arnold! You have no idea what will happen next!" Dipper cried to his nephew, but his words fell on deaf ears before the cap started whirring violently. Red sparks erupted from the girl's head as it felt like her hat was literally drilling itself into her skull. When all was said and done, Haruko rapidly tip-toed toward Gwen and attempted to remove her beanie from her head with little success. But what was successful was the fall of the metal creature as its pieces began falling into the lake before the eyes of everyone still on Scuttlebutt Island. As the Pines began to get up to see what was happening, they barely had time to react before the beast collapsed underneath them. When all the metal was completely submerged in the ocean, the sun rose and they were saved by Jinyu as she parked her car on the new metallic part of the island. "Come on Gwen, please come back to us!" Dipper cried trying to wake his daughter up one last time. "What is even going on?!" "I told you all not to touch that!" Jinyu cautioned the Pines just as the rest came racing toward them, along with Haruko freeing herself from the scrap. "That was perhaps the best dogfight I had ever seen." Soos commented. "Yeah, you both totally went Red Wedding on each other!" Juan added excitedly. "As in murdering hundreds of innocents, including a few pregnant women and their unborn children?" Ezra bluntly replied adjusting his glasses, prompting the two boys to remain silent. "Yeah, let's just drop the slang thang." Juan announced and Jorge quietly nodded. "The emergency system has been activated." Jinyu informed her other self. "And there's nothing you can do to stop it." "Aw geez!" Haruko complained. "Damn, they're so sneaky. Those schwifty bastards." she remarked staring up at the sky. "This is all because you tried to tempt my son." Pacifica coldly responded. "That's right, Hakama tried to..." Arnold tried to speak up before Gwen finally began to rise from her slumber. "W-where did she come from? H-h-here comes Gwen." "What did Arnold do to her?" Juan asked. "I do not want to know." Jorge replied just as puzzled. "Yeah, let's just keep this an enigma til next time." a raccoon with a strange accent suddenly appeared behind them. "Hehehehe, most of the characters in this story are SOOOO stupid!" "W-what the hell, where did he come from?! We didn't see him at all throughout this entire chapter!" Jorge cried in shock over the raccoon. "Ah yes, I'd like you to meet Bawuu, my new pet raccoon, or so he calls himself." Ezra introduced Bawuu while he perched on his shoulder. "He just showed up to me and declared that we should live together, because he claims most of the animals on the island are imbeciles. And I have a feeling he'll barely add anything to our adventures going forward." "Well, guess we got no other choice everyone." Stan announced. "You're right Stanley, we'll have to search for the makers of the hat. And it's not from some chic fashion joint." Jinyu added. "I suppose I'll just have to bust on in." Haruko remarked knowing what their next objective was. "Right," the white-haired woman replied. "our objectives may be different, but our target is still one in the same." Haruko just stared up at the sky for a moment in silence when she finally revealed the name of that target. "Medical Mechanica."

AN: At long last, chapter 3 is done! Apparently I'm just as talented at procrastinating as I am with everything else I'm good at. Ooh speaking of which, still need to finally get back to work on Gravity Soul! Until we meet again some sunny day everyone!