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olivia091108 · 4 months

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how to be a jackass Introduction

Word count:1.k

Tonight I’m going out with my sister and her boyfriend because apparently ‘I need to get a a life’ which I think is kinda rude but the only reason she’s saying that is because her and her boyfriend are thinking of moving out together but I don’t know anyone around town and she doesn’t think I’m responsible. She’s right

“Are you kidding me we need to leave in a half hour and your still in your pyjama’s chop chop”she claps her hands in my face.

She can get quite stressed when it comes to me I wasn’t the easiest to grow up with I was a bit of a hothead we both have a few stories from tell of our fights which she still has a scar form that she never shuts up about

“Alright calm down I have loads of time” I push myself off the sofa and just as I walk past her I barge her against the wall and quickly scurry to the bathroom and lock the door before she gets crazy.

I walk into my room with a towel wrapped round my body and one in my hair and flick the tv on just to have some noise in the background it was an alright show jackass that I would watch when I get back late and nothing else is on except teleshoping. I don’t have anything against it but they need to step it up cos I know give me 10 or 20 bucks I’ll do anything they do.

I find an old shirt from when I was like 15 or something and picked up some jeans that were laying on the floor before slipping on some shoes.

“See I’m ready in what 5 minutes you need to take some Xanax I swear”

“Your hair is literally dripping” I flip my head back and forth no doubt getting it on her. And walk down to her boyfriend Oliver who was gonna drive us.

Once we get their it’s already kicking off and walk towards the bar but some grown men are standing there ignoring me while I ask them to move so I manage to budge my way through them and get a rum and coke.

I start to sweat being surrounded by 15 people who clearly know nothing about personal space. I see my sister and Oliver talking to some dude and my sister starts pointing me out and calling me over.

Y/n come here so you know that show you love jackas-

Love? No I don’t love it I don’t even like it that much but what does that have to do with anything?

“Y/n”she says my name like my mum used to when I would break something she jerked her head to the man just standing there and at first I’m confused but then I realise who he is Oh shit

you don’t like the show sweetheart?the leader of the show asks

“I mean It’s alright but you could do better.” He laughs a bit at my words “oh yeah what then?”

“Nah I didn’t mean to be rud- no I’m serious what do you think”

“Do more nasty shit or more extreme stuff and more painful stunts all in saying is anything you lot do I could do if I knew I was getting paid or just for a laugh”

Ill buy you a drunk if you make out with that man at the bar he points to a fat man who is drenached with sweat and is missing a tooth at the bottom

“Easy.”

I walk over to him and straight up grab his face and kiss him slipping my tongue and feel him grab a handful of my ass and a few seconds later pull away and walk back over to Johnny using the bottom of my shirt to try and wipe my tongue

“Ok your’e turn Pants that biker playing pool” Johnny looks at him and he looks like he will smash his face in. He walks over there and waits till he has his back to him and as hard as he can yanks his jeans down with his boxers coming as well exposing his bare crack Johnny turns round and ores tends to be in a conversation with some random lady.

The man pulls Johnny to face him and holds him by the colour getting redder and redder. His friends start crowding him and they look like they’re gonna jump him so I walk over and tell him.

“Sir they ran into the bathroom he didn’t do it.”

He lets go of Johnny and storms towards the bathroom with his friends following hot on his heals. I burst out laughing making my eyes water.

“I was about to get my ass kicked”Johnny said joining in on your’e laugh.

The night progressed like this having a couple drinks doing some dares. I didn’t even know that Olivier and my sister left. Some of his fiends joined in.

Running along the bar naked then getting pushed off -Chris

I poured salt in my eye

Ehren getting pool balls thrown at him.

And obviously Steve o lit himself on fire spreading it onto my hair

And so on by the end we were all drunk as fuck and had been kicked out.

I wake up with a throbbing head ache and open my eyes but getting blinded by the lights once they adjust I’m in the bath but I don’t recognise it. I get out and try and find out where I am I hear voices so I walk towards it and then it clicks.

We got kicked out and went back to Steve os apartment carrying on the night everything else’s is a bit hazy right now.

I see all of them in the living room chatting and I also see Steve o wearing my shirt that is 4 sizes too small and some boxers.

Hey Steve o can I have my shirt back I groggily ask making them look towards me probably forgetting I was here.

Yeah dude. He takes it off and throws it at me and I take off the one in wearing and give it to him.I turn around and change

“Dude that bruise is gnarly” I look down at my hip bone and see it decorated with a purple bruise from when I tried to break the door down.

“Y/n you weren’t bullshitting last night we’re you? Johnny asks

“What about?”

“Well we were thinking you were right we gotta be more exciting and you seemed pretty into it would you wanna join.”

“No offence babe but Johnny she was drunk as shit she won’t do any of it sobre”

“Try me.”

Time skip

“Im y/n y/l/n and this is electric mouse trap.”

I stick out my tongue and let Chris clip it on to my tongue and immediately feel the electricity. I Jump around in pain trying to keep it in as long as I can to prove to them I can do it. I Shake my head and rip It off my tongue and It feels numb. I try to speak but all that’s coming out is jibberish and everyone including myslef laugh.

“Welcome to jackass y/n”

Guys I’m baaaack

This will be a slower burn series of bam x reader and jackass girl don’t know how often I will post but I’ve planned at least 3 chapters and I’m so excited message me any headcannons you wnat in this

Ik bam wasn’t in this but just you wait

My requests are still open

-liv

#liv’s writing #jackass x reader #bam margera x reader #steve o x reader #steve o #bam margera #johnny knoxville #jackass imagine #jackass #chris pontius #dave england #danger ehren #ryan dunn #wee man #preston lacy

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stratossphere · 2 years

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the bonfire. | j.k

the tension between you and knoxville builds. a lot. set in mid-2003.

word count: 5.6k

warnings: a lot of drinking and smoking (reader is described as a stoner), mentions of age gap, smut, oral (fem. receiving), fingering, p in v sex, unprotected sex, slight breeding kink, knoxville’s dirty mouth in general

"I'm telling you, I don't want to fuck him." You said, an amused expression on your face as you passed the spliff you were smoking over to Bam. You had been on this topic for almost an hour now on and off, and for some reason you just couldn't seem convincing.

"Dude, we all know you do. Just get it over with and tell us if it was good or not." He scoffed, taking a second to suck in a hit before he continued. "The dude has a huge hard-on for you anyway, so might as well shoot your shot."

"I know he has a huge hard-on for me. I'm just...too lazy to deal with that." You groaned as you sunk down in your camp chair. You’d all been sitting at a bonfire outside of someone's friend's house for over two hours now, and you were getting kind of bored. Bam and Ryan had flown in from Pennsylvania the day before, so you were trying to get as much time as possible in with them before they had to leave again, but sometimes they made it hard.

"You're just scared you can't pull him." Bam scoffed, handing the joint back and then dramatically turning in his chair to glance over to where Johnny was. "Although, he's pretty old compared to us."

"I could absolutely pull him. All I'd have to do is bend over in front of him and he'd be barking like a dog." You scoffed, elbowing him not-so-gently. "And who cares if he's older? He acts like he's fucking five."

"So you do want to fuck him." Bam called you out like it wasn't already obvious. "Dude, I'm serious. Go pull your little bend over routine and get out of here. It's physically hurting me to watch you guys anymore."

"Watch us? We barely even talk!" You protested, downing the last of your can of beer before turning back to Bam. "He's not that hard to pull. Remember when that girl kissed his neck and he was blushing like a girl and had to put a pillow in his lap? Easy money."

"Yo! Dunn! C'mere!" Great. Now Bam was bringing another person into this. And, of course, Ryan looked more than happy to drop down in the camp chair across from you. Bam smacked your arm. "We're debating whether or not Y/n’s got enough game to fuck Knoxville."

"Dude, totally. He's like, rock hard for you already." Ryan scoffed, cracking open another beer as he spoke. "You got the guts, though?"

"You know what? You two are assholes." You scoffed, crushing your beer can and tossing it at Ryan's feet. "Watch this shit."

You turned in your chair, looking around and trying to find Johnny again. He'd disappeared from his position next to the ping pong table that Ehren and Steve-O were destroying, and it took you a second to locate him crouched down in front of one of the beer coolers. Perfect.

"Knoxville!" You shouted loudly enough to draw his attention, watching his head crane back in your direction with his sunglasses still sat perfectly on top of his head. It had gotten too dark for him to be able to see properly with them on, so he'd ditched them about half an hour ago. "Can you grab me one?"

"What kind you want?" He shouted back, holding up both Budweiser and PBR. Steve-O had definitely been in charge of beer supply, because all there seemed to be was pisswater for choices. You motioned to his left hand that held the Budweiser, and watched him chuck the other can back into the cooler before kicking it back shut.

"If you two say anything, I'm gonna tell Tremaine to have you shot with paintballs for weeks." You warned quickly as Johnny started his way over, jabbing a finger at each of them individually. You were really praying they didn't mess up your game, because Johnny was going to make it into a huge thing if they did.

"Who? We're not even here." Ryan said dramatically, pretending to zip his lips and throw the key in the fire seconds before Johnny was behind your chair holding the beer over your shoulder.

"You three sharing secrets and braiding each other's hair over here?" He cajoled as he pressed the cold can into your neck, making you wince as he came around the side of your chair and plopped into the empty one that was to your right. "I feel left out."

"Thanks, J." The little nickname lingered on your lips as you took the can from his offering hand, your fingers brushing his as you did so. You watched his eyes stick to yours momentarily, and you could tell that what you were doing was so easily working. Like picking up sticks.

"Fuck off, Knoxville. You don't have enough hair to braid." Bam scoffed, extending his foot across you to kick his friend in the leg. You pushed him away, shooting him a look to kill as you leaned back in your chair slightly.

"We're smoking, if you want some." You offered, motioning to the new joint that Ryan was rolling as we spoke. Johnny shook his head, cracking his beer tab and letting out a gentle sigh.

"On a break right now. I'm sticking to...other things." He said vaguely, putting his feet up on the same empty chair that you currently had yours on. Oh yeah. Easy money.

"Ooh. Other things. My favorite." Bam snorted, as if this conversation was hilarious to him. You shot him another dirty look, and he seemed to take the hint, standing up and wiping his hands off on the legs of his black jeans. "Well, I'm gonna go do something more fucking interesting. Dunn, care to join?"

"Sure, man. I've been hanging out with Y/n way too fucking long, anyway." Ryan scoffed, getting up with the joint still in his hand. You glared at him and held your hand out.

"Leave the weed, fuckhead." You ordered, watching him sigh before dropping the perfectly-rolled joint in the palm of your hand. You then watched them walk away to where they could still watch both of you before turning your attention back to Johnny. "Well? What does 'other things' entail?"

"Nothing heavier than cigs and beer. The way god intended." He sighed, reaching down to grab your lighter off the ground and then handing it over to you.

"What're you taking a break for?" He was kind of making you feel guilty for smoking in front of him, but he was the one that had chosen to drop down right next to the world's biggest stoner.

"Recovery. I feel like I haven't slept for days." He sighed, letting out a slight chuckle as he reached into his back pocket to retrieve a pack of cigarettes. "So. After this, you think you'll be willing to do more stunts?" Huh. Maybe not easy money.

"You want me to do stunts? For what?" You were genuinely surprised. Sure, you'd let Steve-O convince you to do the whole skateboard-into-the-water thing, but that had only been because Bam got food poisoning and needed a stand in.

"Just in case we make another movie! Filming never stops, Y/n/n." He explained, his arm moving to rest on your armrest as he spoke. You frowned at the nickname, moving your arm to rest next to his as you looked out at the fire pit.

"Probably. I liked the money." You said thoughtfully, lighting up the joint and making a point to blow the smoke to your left instead of your right so that it wasn't directly in his face. "I thought you said you were banning women from stunts."

"I did. You're different." He said simply, and you watched him attempt and fail to hide the fact that he was looking directly at your tits in your low-cut tank top. You raised an eyebrow at him in question at calling you 'different'. He quickly spluttered at the look on your face. "Because you're—you're badass. You're different."

"I'm taking that as a compliment." While you talked, you had been slowly inching your feet closer to his, and your shoes were now touching. If he noticed, he didn't say anything about it. "So? What would the next stunt be?"

"Well, we were playing with the idea of...naked barrel racing...across a tarp of lube." It was clear by his face that he was proud of his idea, but you could also tell that he was embarrassed to have to tell you what it was. It actually made you laugh out loud at the ridiculousness of that plan.

"You just want to see me naked." You accused, narrowing your eyes at him. He chuckled, looking unbothered by your accusation before taking another drag from his cigarette.

"What makes you think that? All the guys would be naked, same as you." He said, raising one eyebrow quizzically. You shrugged, a coy smile dragging onto your face.

"Hey. I don't know what you're into. Could be both." You said, hitting your joint as you studied his face. For someone who currently had your foot brushing purposely against his leg, he looked pretty at ease.

"Oh, not me. I'm a tits man, myself." He chuckled, his eyes moving back down to where you were now definitely moving your foot up his leg before looking back to you. "I'm just playing, doll. I'm planning on shooting them with paintball guns once they get out there, so you can't do the stunt."

With those words, a leg dropped down on yours, and you looked down towards your feet to see that he'd trapped the leg moving against his with his own.

"But, I'm sure I can get what I want in a different setting." He concluded, eyes flitting back up to yours. His fingers had now inched over your hand where his arm was next to yours on the arm rest, and you could feel the bandaid that was around his ring finger from picking up a broken bottle on set a couple of days prior.

"Oh yeah? And what exactly is that?" You were so thankful that it took a lot of weed to get you high, because you were afraid that you didn't sound as put-together as you thought you did. He seemed completely sober, and you could help but feel nervous about his hand on yours.

"Come on. I thought that was obvious." He drawled with a wide grin, leaning in close to your ear so that his breath tickled your skin. "I wanna see you bent over and spread in every pretty position I can think of."

"Whew. You pick up fast. I was afraid I was gonna have to get drunk and show you my tits." You laughed, turning slightly in your seat and setting your joint on top of your beer can so that your hands were free.

"Offer's still on the table." He teased, winking at you as he slowly brought your hand up before pressing a kiss to your knuckles.

"Well, how's this?" You then leaned in to kiss him, and were satisfied to see that he met you halfway there, your hand immediately pulling out of his to cup his cheek instead. Kissing Johnny Knoxville. Cross that off the old bucket list.

When you broke away, you were out of breath, and you could feel the way your heartbeat was going a million miles a minute as he leaned away to take another drag of his cigarette without a care in the world.

"You know, I hate it when you call me Knoxville. Sounds better when you're saying my real name." He said, brown eyes on yours as he spoke. The party was loud, and everyone was drunk and shouting at each other, but he spoke so calmly and quietly you almost didn't hear him.

"PJ Clapp. That's so much sexier." You said with a grin, waiting until he wasn't 100% paying attention to lean over your chair and mouth you owe me money to Bam and Ryan, who had just watched that entire exchange. He chuckled.

"Yeah, that's why I don't use it." He sighed, looking up at you once again after he had ashed his cigarette onto the grass between his feet. "You know, I'm a little old for you. I have gray hairs."

"They should call you Silver Foxville." You said dryly, rolling your eyes as you glanced to the limited space between your lips. You’d kissed him once, and now you really wanted it again. And again. "Your dick still works, doesn't it?"

"Thank you for proving that I'm not just a pretty face." He poked fun at your attention to that one certain thing, and he just proved his point with his wide grin. You shrugged, pushing your boldness to the highest level you could stand.

"Pretty face means nothing if you don't have a pretty dick." You said coyly, leaning away from him again to take another hit off of your joint and blow it away from him. You felt a surge of satisfaction as you saw the shaken look on his face. Considering the people he was friends with, you’d assumed he'd heard worse.

"Shit. You're making me fuckin' harder than Portland cement." He muttered, tilting your chin fully towards himself just as you were exhaling another cloud of smoke and pressing his lips to yours as you basically transferred your smoke right into his lungs. "Wanna feel?"

When you gave your hum of approval, you felt his hand on your wrist, and then he was pressing your palm into the bulge of his Dickies, a low groan escaping his lips as your fingers cupped his hard cock through his pants. You were thanking god that your chairs were facing away from everyone else in the group, because you were not a fan of the idea of pictures of what you and Johnny were doing at the moment.

"Fuck. Let's go somewhere else." You mumbled against his mouth, slowly pulling your hand away from him as your eyes darted towards the house that barely anyone else was in. You knew he would've been perfectly fine with you feeling him up to completion right there in the yard, but you were really trying to preserve your dignity, high or not.

"Come on. I know the house." He breathed, breaking away from you and dropping his cigarette under the toe of his close-to-destroyed converse before his eyes zeroed in on the spliff still between your fingers. There wasn't much left, but still enough to where you felt guilty about abandoning it. "And let me see that."

You handed it over hesitantly, half worried that he was going to give the joint the same treatment as his cigarette, but then let out a sigh of relief when he took a hit that had his eyes watering and smoke pouring out of his nose as he coughed. Wow. He really hadn’t been lying about taking a break.

Once he was satisfied with his hit, he handed it back over to you before taking your hand and beginning the walk through the sliding back door and into the house. You prayed for your tomorrow self's sake that no one was paying attention to you both, hoping that somehow the only two people going inside instead of coming out were going magically unnoticed.

"I should really be taking you back to my house. I feel bad." Johnny said as he closed the door behind you, his hand tightening in yours as he dodged expertly around the table and chairs that were moved messily all around the room. You scoffed.

"I don't give a fuck. We could be in a club bathroom for all I care." You said honestly, taking one last hit of your joint before setting the butt down on the kitchen counter as you passed by. His strides were much longer than yours, and you were hurrying to keep pace with him.

"Just how I like it." Just as he spoke, he gently nudged you into an open door, revealing a small bedroom which was quickly determined to be Star Wars themed. You frowned at him, to which he waved it off. "Scott's an eccentric decorator. He's got all themed bedrooms."

"Glad you picked the good one." You muttered as you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling his sunglasses from the top of his head and discarding them on the opposite edge of the bed. His fingers immediately danced over the bottom hem of your decently-short shorts (which you’d actually repeatedly caught him staring at throughout the day of both shooting and partying), pulling them up further over your ass before his hands were kneading your exposed skin.

"Take 'em off." He spoke into your mouth, his hands moving back upwards until his fingers laced their way into your hair so that he could hold you tighter against his kiss. You did as he requested easier than you were willing to admit, yanking them down your hips to reveal your black and white cotton thong. Kind of cheesy, but you didn't miss the way his eyes lit up when he noticed it.

There was a moment where he just studied you, and just as you was going to move in and try to shield yourself from his sharp gaze, his hand was on your lower back and he was gingerly knocking you back onto the bed. He was on you seconds after your head hit the galaxy-print pillows, his hands roughly rucking your legs up over his hips as his lips pressed back onto yours.

You knew you were fucked. You could tell by both the way your whole body shook from just his hungry kisses and the fact that you were already missing his presence when he was still on top of you. But you didn't even care enough to think about it. All you could think about was the fact that he was pulling your tank top over your head, and then his hands were on your tits. He broke your kiss to look down at you, one hand using his thumb to brush over your sensitive nipple as the other held your jaw so that you couldn't look away from him.

"Listen to me, sweetheart." He said breathlessly, biting his bottom lip as he looked down at you in a way that you had never once seen from him in the past four years of knowing him. It was making every part of you that craved him throb even more. "I'm gonna eat your pussy, and you're gonna be a good girl and let me, understand?"

That almost killed you right then and there. You had been pretty sure you were going to be screwed before, but now you were positive. Your legs were tightening around his hips with every word, and you could barely get yourself under control enough to give him a nod. He smiled in satisfaction, then gave you one last kiss before he was pulling out of your grasp, lips leaving a trail of soft kisses down your arm as he slid himself down further towards the edge of the bed.

"So fuckin' hot. Smell so fuckin' delicious." He said as he moved, his fingers nimbly dragging the waistband of your underwear right down your legs as he went along. It was ridiculously smooth, and it made you even wetter for him as you waited less-than-patiently for him to get his mouth on you.

"Please, PJ." You whimpered, legs jello in his hold as he trailed his tongue up your inner thigh. You weren’t someone who usually allowed yourself to be teased, but something about the way he was touching you had you so transfixed that you couldn't even be bothered to complain. He chuckled.

"Oh, I like it when you whine for me. Say my name one more time and I'll let you have what you want." He crooned, sinking his teeth gently into your sensitive skin. You arched your hips up in the direction of his mouth, eager to get some form of release in any way you could manage.

"PJ. Need you so bad." You whined again, lip drawn harshly between your teeth as you watched him with desperate eyes. There was a glint in his gaze that made your heart pound, and you practically saw stars when his lips finally moved to where you needed him, his tongue laving around your clit and down over your entrance in one smooth motion. "Holy shit."

"Shh. Be a good girl for me and keep your mouth shut." He muttered, only taking that split second to remove his mouth before it was back at full force, his lips sucking adamantly at your clit as his tongue weaved intricate symbols that had you rolling your hips against his mouth. Despite his telling you to shut up, you couldn't stifle the moans that welled their way into your throat, your voice high-pitched and strung-out on pleasure.

He brushed his tongue across your clit over and over again, occasionally licking down to push his tongue into your entrance, his fingers replacing his tongue on your clit each time he did so. It felt so good that you felt like you couldn’t see what was in front of you, your senses blinded and heavy with pleasure as he ate you out like no man had ever done before.

"You like everyone hearing how good I'm making you feel? 'S that why you can't control yourself?" He cooed as he removed his lips from my clit, a single finger pushing into you as a replacement as he gazed up at you with sly lust. You let out a disappointed gasp at the change in sensation, your clit aching in his absence. When he saw your face, a second finger followed his first, leaving his index and middle fingers curled inside you fully. "Who knew Y/n Y/l/n was such a pretty little slut."

"Please. Need more." Your voice was airy and distraught, fingers laced in the comforter on either side of you as you urged him to finish what he had originally started. You felt so close, yet so far.

"Don't you worry your pretty little head. You’re gonna get what you want." He promised, curling his fingers forward and pushing them upwards in a slow but precise movement that had your hips involuntarily jerking forward and the air rushing from your lungs. Jesus, he really was good.

He started to push his fingers against that sweet little spot inside of you slowly, his cheek pressed against your inner thigh as he watched his digits disappear into you over and over again. And then, just as you were beginning to think that it wasn't going to be enough, his dipped his mouth back to your pussy, his tongue pressing back against your clit as his fingers worked in and out of you.

Your eyes slammed shut as your head pushed back against the pillow, your chest heaving as you took in the obscene slurping sounds he was making with his tongue mixed with the wet sounds caused by his fingers. He shouldered your legs even further apart, a mischievous glint in his eyes as he stared up at you the entire time.

Your climax was approaching almost embarrassingly fast. Your late night fantasies of Johnny Knoxville's head between your legs was even hotter than you had imagined many times before, and the sight of him grinding his hips down into the bed with every swirl of his tongue was making your entire body thrum with heat.

"I can feel you squeezin' my fingers, dollface. Let me feel you cum on my tongue." Johnny encouraged as he continued to push his fingers into you, his free hand pushing on your hip to keep you from pushing up into his mouth as aggressively as you wanted to. Your moans and gasps were now way beyond your control, and your voice only got louder as your back arched up, your climax hitting you hard enough to make you see stars as your eyes fell back open.

You had half a mind to clap your hand over your mouth as you panted and whined through your orgasm, your free hand taking a handful of his dark brown hair and pulling as you came. He didn't stop his tongue and fingers until your voice gave out and you were forcibly gasping for air, your grip in his hair going lax as you came back down to earth.

"Holy fuck." You breathed, wincing when he pulled his fingers out of you and accepting him with open arms as he moved back up to look at you with gleeful eyes and a spit-soaked chin. You reached out and used the collar of his shirt to pull up and wipe his mouth off, only to have him immediately suck his equally-wet fingers into his mouth once you had dropped the fabric back down to his throat.

"Damn. Can't get you to shut your mouth no matter if you're gettin' finger-fucked or not." He said cockily as he pulled his fingers from his mouth and wiped them off on his shirt. When you gave him a dirty look, he leaned his head to the side to suck gently at your neck, the rumble of his baritone laugh tickling your skin. "Although, haven't fucked you yet. We'll see."

"I can't cum again so fast." You said in surprise as he began to undo the buckle of his KNOXVILLE belt, a hand moving to his chest as you looked up at him with wide eyes. Your legs were still shaking, and if you had been loud before, it was only going to get worse if he fucked you while you were so sensitive. He kissed you gently, his eyes locked on yours.

"You can take it. Look, you've already got your legs spread nice and wide for me." He reassured, his hand gripping your thigh as he ripped his belt from his belt loops. You weren’t quite reassured, but you fumbled to get the zipper of his pants down regardless, his lips on yours encouraging you to let him do whatever the hell he wanted with you.

Once he had completely gotten his pants undone with your help, he stood up to quickly shuffle them off along with his boxers, leaving him bare from the waist down in front of you. Your mouth practically watered at the sight of his cock, hard and leaking against the hem of his t-shirt. You barely gave him any time to stand there, pulling him back in with your fingers around his wrist before he was kneeling in front of your spread legs with his mouth half-open.

"You got a condom somewhere?" He asked suddenly, eyes unable to pull away from between your legs as he spoke to you. You mentally slapped myself, because of course you didn't have one, and since he was asking, he obviously didn't either. Unsafe sex was called unsafe sex for a reason.

However, you were too impatient to think rationally.

"No. You can just pull out." You said impatiently, watching as he gently pulled your legs back over his thighs. His gaze was so searing and yet his hands were more than careful with you, his touch so light it almost felt as if you were moving on your own.

"I like the way you think." He teased, pumping himself a few times as his eyes finally dragged their way back up to yours. "Be as loud as you want, gorgeous. I don't give a fuck."

You nodded as if you even had a choice, holding your breath as you felt the tip of his cock swipe through your pussy before he was slowly pushing himself into you. If there were any lingering thoughts in your head of anyone else you had ever even considered having sex with in the past, each and every one was erased with the drag of his cock inside of you. You both let out heated gasps, his hand tightening on your leg just above your knee and your head falling back once again. You were still a little sensitive from your last orgasm, and every touch felt like electricity as he slowly pushed his way completely inside of you.

"Fuck, you feel so good." He groaned, his hips stilling momentarily as you tensed at his length. As his tip brushed against your cervix with just his entering thrust, you knew you were in for it. You had seen him naked more times than you had previously been a fan of whilst working for Jackass, and at the time you had assumed he was a shower, but holy fuck was he a grower. It made another shudder of pleasure race up your stomach. "So fucking tight."

He didn't seem to be able to stand much time waiting, and before you knew it, he was slowly rolling his hips into you, his cock hitting every still-sensitive nerve as he fucked into you. You watched in ecstasy as he pulled the hem of his shirt up his muscled torso, biting it between his teeth so that he had both hands free to pull you forward on his cock.

"Oh. Right there. Right there." You gasped, moaning languidly as he picked up the pace of his hips and fucked right against the spot that he'd had his fingers against not three minutes before. He groaned in agreement, his head falling back and pulling his shirt further up his chest as he put all his movement into his hips.

You were really hoping that rubbing against the mattress while he'd been eating you out had gotten him at least a little close to cumming, because your second orgasm was quickly edging its way through your nerves as he fucked you hard enough to make the bed creak painfully loud. If anyone walked in through the unlocked door by that point, it was going to be their own fault.

"You look so good, takin' my cock like such a pretty little slut." Johnny purred, holding your legs open hard enough to make your muscles ache as he slammed into you over and over again. The pleasure was so good and so intense that your eyes were watering, and you could feel tears starting to track down the side of my face as you gripped helplessly at the sheets in a failed attempt to ground yourself with something. "You'd look so good with my cum dripping out of you."

You tried to mouth not funny, but all you could do was moan, his filthy words making you teeter dangerously on the edge of cumming before you were ready. You weren’t on birth control, but you weren’t exactly a big fan of making good decisions anyway, so you decided that if you weren’t able to get the words out, that you really didn't need to say them.

"Fuck, you want me to fill you up?" He questioned, his voice muffled by his t-shirt still between his teeth and his words followed by a low groan. "Fill you up like the good little slut that you are?"

You whined in agreement, nodding your head as best you could as you arched your back up further with every slam of his cock against your cervix. It was a pleasured pain, one that you knew you’d be feeling for the next couple of days.

"I'm gonna cum, princess." He whined, seconds before his hips stuttered and you felt him cum inside of you, warmth painting your insides as you let out a porno-style moan and came right there on the spot with him. That had to be a good sign for the both of you, right? "So goddamn good."

Your second orgasm was even more blinding, and your vision went white as your back arched up painfully, your fingers helplessly pulling at the bed as you whimpered and gasped with every wave of pleasure that coursed through your body. His hands stayed on your hips the entire time until you were verbally begging him to stop thrusting his cock into you, the wet sound of him pushing his cum back inside reaching your ears as he slowly moved to a stop.

"You sounded so good, baby. Did so good." He babbled, immediately falling forward to press his lips sloppily to your throat as his hips moved lazily as he thrusted his last bit of energy out. Your head was spinning and your legs and pussy were already aching in the sweetest way possible as you wrapped your arm around his neck.

"God, you're fucking good at that." You breathed, letting out a strangled gasp when he finally pulled out of you. Whoever used the Star Wars comforter next was going to notice a suspicious looking stain right in the middle of it next time they got into bed.

"I can't believe it took us this long." He said, his breath coming out in pants as he steadied himself with one hand on the mattress next to your head. You realized with the increased quiet inside the room that you could hear multiple people talking and shouting at each other from outside of the door, and you mentally cringed because you knew that were was no way that you hadn't been overheard.

"Everyone's gonna know." You mumbled, carding your fingers through his hair as you finally felt your breathing beginning to calm again. You could feel his heartbeat against yours, and it still hadn't slowed down either. It made you feel a little bit better about yourself. He pressed a kiss to your temple, then your cheek, then your lips.

"Good. Then everyone will know that I'm the one who's giving it to you good, and I won't have any competition."

Oh yeah. You were done for.

#johnny knoxville #johnny knoxville x reader #johnny knoxville smut #jackass #jackass imagine #jackass mtv #jackass movie #bam margera #ryan dunn #sorry if this looks a little fucked tumblr mobile is hell

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knoxvilleaura · 2 years

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Convinced he was born to be a dilf

#johnny knoxville #bam margera #jackass #jeff tremaine #ryan dunn #steve o #jackass forever #jackass fanfic #johnny knoxville fanfic #pj clapp #johnny knoxville x reader #johnny knoxville smut #johnny knoxville oneshot #johnny knoxville headcannons #johnny knoxville imagine

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knoxvillesjackass · 1 year

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hello! I had an idea of No Nut November with Johnny x female reader. The jackass guys all dare each other to do it and the winner couple is who lasts the longest. When his girlfriend finds out, she keeps teasing him and it all ends in smut!! Love your stories!! ❤️

𝐧𝐨 𝐧𝐮𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 - 𝐣.𝐤

im so happy to finally see a smut request!! pls, send some more, because i want to get better at writing it! also, do you guys enjoy reading it or do you like fluff and/or angst better?

warnings! edging, oral sex dom!johnny x sub!reader? ( reader receiving and giving), dirty talk, very dirty hihi

words; 3.375

It was bizarre. Annoying, really. You’d given him every opportunity in the world to rail you, blow your back out and make you incapable of walking for the day…All of your attempts were shut down, which was new for you.

Usually, all you had to do was send the smallest signal to Johnny, and he would be ready at any time, but the past two weeks had been different.

He’d been avoiding you, it seemed. He only kissed you when he left for work, and he’d even slept on the couch for some nights.

You’d been left confused and a little hurt by it all. Had you done something wrong, or was he perhaps just not attracted to you anymore?

The thoughts killed you, but it killed him even more. If it hadn’t been for that stupid bet….

“A month without sex? You’ve gotta be shitting me,” Johnny shook his head as the room erupted in laughter, but he was totally serious.

He couldn’t believe that he was the only one objecting to this nonsense. The concept was idiotic and frankly childish.

Steve-O had been the one to bring it up during lunch break. Everyone had shrugged it off, but as the tension grew thicker throughout the day, everyone suddenly began to take it very seriously, Johnny included.

So, as stupid as he thought it was, Johnny was knee-deep in the ‘No Nut November’ phenomenon, even though he hated the idea.

You and Johnny had sex a lot. No shame in that. Just two adults, who loved each other very much. What Johnny did feel off about, was that all of his friends knew just how much sex you had. How? Well, at every given chance to escape the craziness of the crew, the two of you did. And you didn’t do it to have conversations and drink tea. No, you did it to fuck.

Johnny had been labelled as the guy to fail the quickest, and it didn’t sit right with him one bit.

Luckily for him, his self-control was a different ball game. He had more control than all of the jackass guys combined. If there was a will, there was a way, and Johnny never let himself down once he had a goal.

“Oh, y-you’re participating?” Steve-O asked Johnny, who shrugged and nodded. “Yeah,” he huffed, and the room once again erupted in laughter, this time, it sounded more ridiculing than anything.

“What?” He asked confused and scoffed as he stared back at his wide-eyed friends. “Dude, you’re not going to last for two days,” Pontius grinned, Johnny returning a simple growl. “Let’s just fucking see, shall we?”

“Hi, baby!”

You grinned excitedly as Johnny entered your shared apartment. You wrapped your arms around him tightly, furrowing your eyebrows at once when you didn’t feel him embracing you.

“Are you okay?” You asked and unwrapped your arms around his waist, looking up at him innocently. “Y-Yeah, I’m fine, Y/N, I’m just tired. Think I’m gonna go take a shower,” he commented, his eyes focused straight ahead and not down at you.

“Oh, okay. Well, I could join,” you smirked and winked at him, but he merely shook his head and smiled politely before disappearing to the bathroom.

Well, that sucked, you thought.

He was probably just tired. He’d been working long hours, and maybe all the man needed was some space.

You’d attempted to be the understanding girlfriend, even when you felt ignored by Johnny.

The first few days went by okay, although the hours seemed to get longer as the days went by. The week overall was manageable but when the second week struck, Johnny was beginning to struggle.

The day of your anniversary, you'd made everything really special for Johnny. Dressed up nice, cooked some good food, and made the bathtub the perfect place to end the night, together.

When he'd come home, he'd acted just as you'd feared.

Distant and seemingly blind to the effort you'd put into making your fourth anniversary a special one.

The dinner was awkward and you hated the tension. You broke the silence every minute, asking him questions to which he answered with simple and short sentences.

"I have a surprise for you," you smirked. Maybe what he needed was some extra spice, and that was what you were going to give him.

"A surprise?" He asked as he was washing the dishes. He jumped when he felt your arms snake around his waist. Johnny moved away and coughed. His boxers were starting to feel tight, uncomfortably tight.

You grabbed his hand and dragged him to the bathroom. You'd scattered rose petals on the floor and lit some candles. It was the most romantic bathroom you'd ever seen, but Johnny didn't seem to agree.

"O-Oh, Y/N," Johnny coughed nervously and slowly backed out of the bathroom.

"Did I do something wrong? Are you trying to punish me or something? Please, tell me what's going on!"

"No, Y/N-"

"Then why won't you FUCK ME?" You shouted and sniffled. Johnny's heart tore a bit. He wanted to tell you, he really did, but with the mood and how you were feeling, it didn't seem as if it would've been a massive help in his eyes.

The next days were rough. You were upset, understandably. Johnny continued his odd behaviour and you were just about done with it all.

“Just tell me now; when did you give in and how was it?”

Bam stood like a little child next to Johnny and giggled, but Johnny rolled his eyes underneath his sunglasses and sighed.

“I haven’t given in yet, and I’m not going to, so you might as well quit bothering me.”

Bam scoffed at the answer he got from Johnny, but he hadn’t expected much else, considering Johnny’s recent behaviour.

He was in a pissy mood. He was at conflict with himself at all times. The whole dare had transformed into something beyond his control. He was so competitive, sometimes it scared people.

Johnny sat down in the conference room, where the crew held their weekly meetings. He cursed to himself and looked around. Pontius, Steve-O and Jeff sat and looked at him with smug grins.

“How’re you holding up over there, Knoxville?” Jeff asked, to which he received a middle finger from Knoxville.

“It’s been a long time since I've seen Y/N around? When is she coming by again?" Pontius pouted. Just the thought of your name at this point, could get Johnny hot and bothered.

"I-She's not," Johnny mumbled and rubbed his sweaty forehead. Was it just him, or was it starting to get super hot?

"That's weird. I talked to her this morning. She said, she's dropping by to say hello," Jeff said and immediately, Johnny tensed up.

"What?" He asked. He hated to even think it, but you were the last person he needed to see now.

"Y/N!" Wee-man yelled as soon as he saw your figure in the doorway.

Johnny hid his face in his hands as soon as he heard your voice. He imagined you saying his name, moaning it, screaming it.

"Hi, guys," you smiled and entered the conference room, greeting all of the guys with a hug, moving your way around the table until you reached Johnny. "Hi, babe," you smiled and leaned down to plant a kiss on his lips, although he moved away almost immediately.

You scoffed and stood up. What had you expected? He'd only been treating you like that for the last two weeks.

"Well, I can see that I'm not wanted here," you mumbled but were quickly met with reassurance from everyone but Johnny.

"Why would you think that?" Jeff asked, "we love having you here, Y/N."

"You might, but I think Johnny feels a bit different," you hissed and glared at Johnny, who slapped his forehead.

Suddenly, Ehren began laughing hysterically, to everyone's surprise. "Wait, you haven't told her yet?" He grinned and the boys slowly caught on and joined Ehren's laughing fit.

Johnny was so not having it. His fists were curled and his jaw was clenched. And you, you were utterly confused as to what was going on.

"Told me what?"

You raised your eyebrow and looked down at Johnny, who refused eye contact at all costs, the guilt weighing him down like uranium.

"We dared each other do the no nut Novem-"

"Don't even finish that sentence," you said and cut Ehren off. You were quiet for a few moments, trying to assemble yourself before speaking up.

"You wanna explain yourself, asshole?" You spat and looked down at Johnny, who sighed and looked up at you.

"Y/N, I'm so so-"

"Do you guys know how long it's been since I've had sex with my boyfriend?" I asked into the room and the guys all chuckled.

Of course, they knew. They were a part of it too, after all.

"Two weeks!"

It didn't sound like a lot, but anyone who knew you and Johnny understood that this was totally out of the ordinary.

"You're telling me I have to wait two weeks before he can bang me? How many of you guys are still in this bullshit?" You asked loudly to which Pontius, Jeff, Ehren and Wee-Man's hands went up.

"Fuck this," you sighed. You knew just how competitive Johnny was. Nothing could get in his way. Literally nothing, but then again, if anyone had the slightest chance, it was most definitely you.

"Y/N?"

You sighed at the sound of Johnny's voice.

Your fingers were curled inside of yourself as you lay spread across the bed.

You continued, although the sound of Johnny's footsteps came closer and closer.

You closed your eyes and began rubbing your clit, letting out a quiet moan.

"Y/N-fuck," Johnny breathed out when he walked in on you pleasuring yourself. His cock was throbbing at the sight of your naked body, but he denied all of those feelings and shuffled out of the room. The sight had made him hard as a rock.

"Johnny!" You called out. An idea had popped into your head.

He opened the door and peeked in. Your legs were spread open and they were trembling with anticipation.

"Huh?" He asked you. His eyes were almost closed. He couldn't bare to see more.

"Look, I know you're not allowed to cum or whatever, but I'm horny and I need your help," you stated and Johnny's eyes opened wide. You might be on to something, he thought.

Pleasuring you always brought Johnny pleasure, he didn't even have to pull his dick out for this one.

He smiled and rushed over to you.

He wasted no time digging his two fingers into your cunt, plunging them in and out of your wet entrance. His head rested between your legs as his tongue made contact with your clit. You reached down and grabbed a handful of his hair. God, he loved it when you did that.

What he loved, even more, was the way his name sounded when you screamed it out of pure pleasure. "Fuck, Johnny!" You cried and grabbed his one hand that wasn't fucking your cunt and pulling it up to your breast, signalling for him to massage it, which he did, gladly.

Johnny smiled against your folds and licked them up and down, ever so often pinching your sensitive clit between his lips, which drove you crazy.

"I-I think I'm g-"

"Look at me, babydoll," he ordered and you followed, looking directly into his dark brown eyes. You couldn't contain the eye contact for long though, because your eyes rolled into the back of your head and you let out a loud cry as you reached your awaited orgasm.

You tugged at Johnny's hair and breathed in loudly, trying to gather yourself.

"J-Johnny, just fuck me already, please," you sobbed and looked at Johnny.

The offer was so tempting, but he just couldn't. He snapped out of his thoughts when he felt his jeans tightening to the point of it being uncomfortable.

"O-Oh, shi-" he hissed and suddenly flew away from his position. You looked him up and down, eyes landing on the massive boner, he had packed. You held back an evil laugh as Johnny stormed out of the room. "Where are you going?" You yelled as you stood up from the bed.

"I-I'm just gonna go for a drive!" he yelled back and slammed the door. He wasn't angry with you, and you knew that. He was angry with himself. This bet was starting to get really fucking old.

The next days were seriously awful for Johnny. After helping you out, he realised that it might've been a bad idea.

The only thing on his mind was the feeling of your pretty cunt against his fingers and the sound of your screams still rang in his ears every now and then.

And you'd, of course, been making his life a living hell. Walking around naked in the apartment or dressing up in your sexiest lingerie.

Johnny kept himself together, though, and you had to give him credit. He'd handled it all very well, better than you ever could.

(random a/n; this same-ish story, but where the reader is dared?)

The end of November was just around the corner, thankfully. Sure, Johnny's hands were equivalent to magic, but nothing beat the feeling of his cock ramming into you.

You couldn't wait, quite literally. Johnny was so much better at staying committed to a dare than you. You needed him. Like, really needed him.

"Johnnyyyy," you whined and threw yourself at him like a little toddler,

He wasn't as sensitive as before. It seemed that the roles had taken a 180 because you were hornier than ever.

Johnny was sitting with his computer when you suddenly planted yourself in his lap and hugged him tightly.

"What's going on?" He asked and rubbed your back.

"I want it so badly," you whispered and bit your lip. Johnny stiffened up and shifted uncomfortably around on the couch. "Three days to go, Y/N," he comforted you, but that wasn't good enough. "No, but like, now," you said and reached down to straddle his cock. He let out a yelp and lifted you from his lap to the seat beside him as he stood up and paced around.

He was frustrated. It was really not fun anymore. Actually, it never was.

Johnny hurried to his phone and put the phone to his ear.

"Chris, you tell me now and be honest; who's still a part of this November bullshit?" Johnny asked. You smiled to yourself and crossed your fingers.

No one, please say no one.

You couldn't quite hear the rest of the conversation. You didn't really care either, because when Johnny came out, he had darker eyes and a wicked smirk on his lips.

"Go to the bedroom and take your clothes off. I'll be up in two minutes."

You squealed with excitement and ran up the stairs faster than ever.

You stripped out of your clothes and threw them to the side, feeling a knot in your stomach, waiting to be untied.

Johnny entered the room. He'd taken his shirt off on the way up the stairs.

"Get on your knees," Johnny ordered and you did so immediately and without protest of any sort.

The room was pretty dark, but you could still see Johnny's crooked smirk.

He approached you, stopping when he stood right in front of your kneeled figure.

He brushed some hair out of your face and cupped your cheeks as you stared up at him, batting your eyelashes.

He gathered your hair into a ponytail at the back of your head and tied it with the hair tie he had around his wrist.

"Fuck, I've missed your mouth," he moaned and unbuttoned his pants, not even bothering to pull them all the way down. And you were just as desperate to please him again, so without waiting any longer, you took a hold of his rock-hard length and gave it a few pumps. Johnny threw his head back when you put just the tip into your mouth. Impatient and understandably needy, Johnny skipped your slow tempo and grabbed the back of your head, pushing his cock into your mouth fully.

After four years of dating Johnny, your gag reflex was pretty much non-existent.

He began gently thrusting himself into your mouth and then sped up until you eventually could feel his tip at the end of your throat.

You watched with tears in your ears as your boyfriend had lost himself in you, thrusting himself into your mouth again and again until he was a mumbling, moaning mess, cumming down your throat.

You swallowed and Johnny watched you in admiration as he offered you his hand to help you stand up.

Your lips crashed together for the first time in weeks, and you moaned into the kiss when you reached the bed. Johnny put a hand behind your head and the other one on your back, slowly lowering you on the bed as he hovered over you with a hungry, lust-filled gaze.

You were merely wearing his t-shirt and a pair of old shorts, which Johnny quickly tore away, your underwear following. He pulled the shirt from over your head and admired your naked body for a while, before snapping out of his trance to return to his duty.

He began placing kisses down your chest but you pulled him up when you saw where he was going. You grabbed his hand and forced it down to your dripping cunt. "I don't need anything, I just want you to fuck me," you nodded and Johnny smiled. Foreplay was always a big thing in your relationship. It was a way to ensure that both parts were 100% ready, but there was no doubt in your mind; you were ready.

"You're still on the pill despite this stupid bet, right?" He asked and you nodded. He knew how bad you were at forgetting it, and he often scolded you for it.

"Good girl," he whispered raspily. That made your heart melt.

His tip was at your entrance, and you wondered if the three weeks had changed something within you. Was it going to hurt after that long with no sex?

You shook every thought off when Johnny placed a kiss on your forehead and slowly pushed into you.

"Ah-!"

Johnny looked at you with wide eyes. You apologised quietly.

"It must be because it's been a while," you said and Johnny nodded, understanding what you were feeling.

He continued pushing his member into you and watched you closely as you clenched your eyes shut and dug your nails into his wide shoulders.

He rested for a while, waiting for your sign to move, and when that sign came, he began pumping in and out of you slowly but deeply.

You grasped onto him and pulled him as close as possible while also wrapping your legs around his waist. "F-Faster," you moaned with closed eyes and Johnny grunted as he sped up, fucking you at an impossibly fast pace.

Everything seemed to go dull for a short moment. Your pussy clenched and your belly contracted tightly when a wave of pleasure hit you like a thousand bricks.

"I-Oh, my God!"

Your nails dug deeply into Johnny's back and you scratched them up towards his neck, where they rested, fiddling with the ends of his brown hair.

"Look at me, baby," Johnny ordered and continued his thrusts. You had to collect yourself before even listening to his orders, but Johnny was impatient and close to an orgasm, so he didn't have much time.

"Y/N, I said look at me," he repeated. The tone made you look at him immediately and you bit your lip and moaned loudly as you watched him orgasm for the second time that night.

"Fuuuck-urgh, baby!"

He trembled and with one last thrust, he pulled out of you and fell down beside you with a heavy but satisfied sigh.

"This November has been the best and worst of my life," you sighed and Johnny laughed in agreement as he kissed your forehead and snuggled you closer.

probably my favourite smut i've ever written, but what do you think?

#johnny knoxville fanfic #johnny knoxville jackass #jackass #jackass x reader #johnny knoxville #jackass imagine #chris pontius #dave england #ehren danger #preston lacy #ryan dunn #wee man #johnny knoxville fluff #johnny knoxville smut #johnny knoxville imagine

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johnnyknoxvilleswife · 4 months

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Jackass Clutterboard - potentially inspired by a jackass girl

#jackass #johnny knoxville #bam margera #chris pontius #jackass 4ever #gwendolyn'smoodboards #moodboard #jackass headcanons #jackass outfits #ryan dunn #steve o #jackass fanfic #jackassgirl #stuntgirl #johnny knoxville x reader #johnnyknoxvilleedit #johnny knoxville imagine

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babybammargera · 11 months

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POV you’re the reckless grunge chick of the jackass crew

Always covered in bruises.

Getting scraped up and the boys covering you in cartoon bandaids (which are featured in most of your scenes at this point)

You’re like Steveo in the sense of documenting gnarly slams except you take pics with a Polaroid.

Longish nails that haven’t been broken during filming but are covered in chipped nail polish.

^Bam or Dunn probably painted them one drunk night bc they found a random nail polish at a party.

Nosebleeds from slamming are normal for you but surprisingly you haven’t broken it yet.

(as far as you know anyway)

Somehow always getting hurt in stunts when you’re paired up w Ryan or Steveo.

“Ow Ry your big ass foot went right into my ribs.”

Broke your arm within the same week Ryan did and Jeff was pissed.

He still refuses to let either of you hear the end of it.

He was also mortified seeing the two of you randomly smacking each other with your casts.

You bounce back from said injuries faster than most of the guys would.

And sometimes you pull off stunts the guys couldn’t and never let them live it down.

Annoying Spike Knoxville and Tremaine like it’s your job. Bc technically it is.

To be fair you bully all of them bc they do the same to you.

You’ve definitely tripped Dave before bc he made a sly comment as darf.

Honestly you probably need a shower but you’re still hot so.

Can’t keep up with things to save your life.

Never having clean clothes and ending up raiding all the guys luggage.

Like you’ve definitely stolen a pair of cleanish jeans from Steveo or Bam or Dunn.

And who knows how many shirts from the others.

CLUMSY

Not when it comes to stunts but outside of filming you trip on air or run into walls bc you’re not paying attention.

You’ve punched bam for laughing when it happens on more than one occasion

#jackass #cky #viva la bam #bam margera #ryan dunn #jackass headcanons #jackass imagine #mtv jackass #jackass fic #jackass headcannons #jackass hcs

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missusdunn · 7 months

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Bam Margera X f!reader X Ryan Dunn pt.1

Warnings!! - Smut, Oral f!giving, cussing, 18++++

Dating Bam Margera threw you into a lot of spontaneous adventures. The parties, impulsive trips across the world, dangerous stunts. It became normal to expect the unexpected. The only predictable thing about Bam was his selfishness especially when it came to you. You are his and his only. You couldn’t even have a friendly conversation with another man without Bam going into a bitch fit. However, there is one exception. Ryan Dunn. They’re a two-in-one deal. You can’t get close to one without the other. And Bam trusts Ryan so no reason for jealousy. Just a trio of pals.

One night, Ryan invites the two of you to his apartment to drink and hang out. Anticlimactic but fun nonetheless. You and Bam head over there with a bottle of vodka and let yourselves in. “Oh hey, you two! Thanks for knocking, so considerate!” Ryan greeted. Bam chuckles and says “Don’t act like you don’t walk into my house like that, asswipe.” “Whatever,” Ryan grabs the vodka from Bam “this’ll make up for it.” I roll my eyes, kick off my shoes, and make my way to the couch. Bam follows suit and Ryan goes to the kitchen to get cups. Bam stretches and melts into his seat. “Finally a night to relax with my two favorite people.” He smiles and puts his arm over my shoulder. I playfully roll my eyes “Don’t be sappy just to get into my pants later.” He sarcastically puts his hands up “Sorry, sorry.” He smirks. “I have better tactics anyway.” He cups my face with his right hand and leans in for a kiss. Of course, I kiss back and it doesn’t take long until his tongue is in my mouth. After a few more seconds Ryan is back. “Excuse me but I’d appreciate it if you two didn’t fuck on my couch!” He says playfully. “We’re not fucking, Dunn,” Bam grumbles with a slight pout having cut the make-out short. “Yet. Thank god I stopped it just in time.” Ryan says placing cups on the coffee table. I laugh and pick up my glass to fill with liquor. Ryan stops me from picking up the bottle and pours it for me. “Oh, such a gentleman,” I say sarcastically while taking a sip. “Anything for you, darling.” He playfully winks filling up the other two glasses. “You fuckers know I’m right here right?” Bam rolls his eyes as Ryan and I laugh. Bam grabs the remote and tosses it to Ryan. “Put some shit on, Dunn let’s get fucked up.” As he chugs his first round.

A couple hours later we’re all buzzed. It didn’t take long for the TV to become background noise. After multiple conversations filled with slurs and giggles the topic of Ryan’s love life came up.

“You really haven’t been getting any lately?” Bam laughs. “Dude it’s not a big deal!” Ryan defends himself. “I’ve just been busy!” Bam continues to laugh “Yeah you’re so busy binge drinking on your couch!” Ryan’s brows furrow “fuck you.” I hit Bam on the shoulder and give Ryan a sympathetic look. “Ry, there’s no shame in not having sex! Not everyone can be sexually active twenty-four seven.” I say “Unlike some whores…” I motion to Bam. Ryan lets out a chuckle and Bam rolls his eyes. “If I’m a whore that would make you one too, idiot,” Bam argues. “Oh babe you and I both know that’s not how it works,” I sigh “Your body count is 10x times mine!” “Whatever since you’re fucking me you’re a whore by association.” He snickers. “You’re such an idiot.” I sip my drink. Bam smirks and leans in. “Your idiot.” Kissing me and turning it into a full-on make-out session in less than ten seconds. That’s gotta be a record.

Ryan groans. “Again please do that anywhere else.” Bam pulls away and looks at his friend. “Yknow what just fucking join, Dunn.” Ryan’s eyes go wide and I’m too shocked to say anything. “What?” Ryan asks, thinking it’s a joke. “It’ll help with your blue balls that make you so pissy,” bam smirks “and I know how long you’ve wanted to fuck y/n.” Ryan keeps his eyes on Bam with red coating his cheeks. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Bam chuckles “Yes you do!” He points out “Before we started dating you, I would talk about all the things we’d do to her!” Now I’m the one with cherry-red cheeks. “Come on, Dunn you down or not?” Bam looks at me as if he’s asking with his eyes. “I’m down if Ryan’s down…” I stumbled out. Bam looks back at Ryan “Alright, let’s do it then.” Ryan agrees. Bam smirks in satisfaction and motions Ryan to sit next to me. Now I'm in the middle. Bam goes for my neck kissing and sucking. While I’m left looking into his friend’s eyes. Ryan hesitated a little bit but then kissed me like it was the end of the world. My throat vibrated with moans and Bam’s hands made their way to my chest. Groping me through my top before pulling it over my chest to expose my tits. I gasped into Ryan’s mouth from the sudden movements. Ryan pulls back to look at my breasts, groaning at the sight. He pushes Bam’s hands away and replaces them with his own. Bam immediately starts to kiss me sloppily. As Ryan has begun sucking on my tits making sure both nipples get the same amount of attention. My moans gradually increase the hotter it gets. I push both the boys away from me. They give me a confused and concerned look. Before they could say anything I got down on my knees in front of them. Their eyes widened in realization before slightly scooting closer together so they weren't too far apart. I began to palm them through their jeans, both of them already hard. “I need you both now,” I whine. Immediately the two start fumbling with their belts whipping their dicks out.

I spit onto both of my hands and begin to jerk my boyfriend and his best friend off. Bam’s groaning and Ryan has his eyes closed letting out breathy moans. I wrap my mouth around Bam’s dick and begin to deep throat him. Trying to get his cock covered in as much saliva as possible. As my left hand continues to stroke Ryan’s Bam grabs my hair and pushes me down on his length a bit more. Groaning when he reaches the back of my throat. I push back off his lap and replace my mouth with my hand. I shift my attention to Ryan and I start to suck the tip of his cock, swirling my tongue around it. And jerking off his shaft twisting up and down. Ryan’s heavily breathing with his eyes locked on mine. I continue to switch between the two men with my mouth, whilst jerking the other one off. Bam’s moans get louder letting me know that he's close. I have a hand on each of the men's shafts. I begin to firmly stroke Bam, twisting up and down. My tongue hovers over his tip waiting for his cum. With a final groan, Bam shoots his load onto my face. From the lewd image of my face covered in cum Ryan finishes in my hand. “Shit.” Ryan curses. I move my face towards my cum-covered hand and clean it up with my tongue. Both boys catch their breaths before sharing a chuckle. “I can’t believe we just fucking did that.” Ryan laughs. “I remove my hands from them, cleaning myself up with a nearby throw blanket. “Consider it an early Christmas present.” Bam continues. “You may wanna wash this…” I smirk, tossing the soiled blanket at Ryan. The two laugh as I get up to go to the bathroom. Until Bam interrupts my movements “Hey, where are you going? It’s your turn.”

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