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glemmerdash-piecesof8 · 8 days

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, surfacing only for food and ablutions. As they lay tangled before sleep on Sunday night, Roo remembered Curtis talking about water, and smiled to herself before falling into a deep sweet sleep.

Because every man is an island

Shane woke up wishing he had a hangover. He had spent the night before drinking whiskey with Carl from the record shop after inviting him around to talk, knowing Carl on this pittance of a salary would endure his thought processes on absolutely anything if at least one bottle of Isle of Jura was in the offering.

Shane had gotten three just be sure and as he woke up and realised he should insist on Carl taking the bottle and a half left home after his confessions. He knew when he stood up there would be no woolly headedness to speak of but the idea of Carl asleep on his couch made him a little slower to test his self-knowledge.

Carl, named after Carl Jung by his mother, was an avid record collector who lived with his grandmother at the ripe age of 33. He also had a tummy. He never had girlfriends really because he was incredibly shy around girls but had gotten on with Roo surprisingly though not too surprisingly considering Roo could be interested in anyone long enough to get through most people’s defences.

Shane had confessed to Carl that he was seriously considering going ahead with the experiment but not just because he had realised he was still in love with Roo. He wanted to do something really useful with the show.

Last year he had done the Presencing Institute’s online course and now he was itching to do something which really helped rehabilitate society. He had knocked around ideas at his closest hub with people who seem more interested in discussing politics or getting a date then actually really using the material properly.

Maybe he should have changed hubs. Oh well, it was too late now. He could always do the course again he supposed. The people had been an incredibly good bunch. It was his favourite MOOC so far, and the only one he had completed so far except for the one on Carl Sagan.

Coffee time though. That would cheer up and you remember the plan they had come up with, which had pretty much floored him. It had been so ambitious. He looked at the time. Shit! He thought, it’s already 4 PM! The coffee place closes in an hour!

They had only gone to bed at 7 AM, and suddenly Luke remembered Carl had work so he better go wake him. Shane always gave himself Mondays off as he often ended up teaching or playing shows on the weekend. He needed one day a week where he could be a proper person and he knew he was lucky but he also knew his time was worth protecting.

Woolly hat on, wallet, keys, might as well pack my gym bag to. Wonder out to the studio. Carl is gone, blankets neatly folded with the extra pillow from Shane’s bed on top . Note.

Hi Shane

Gone to work. Been thinking we must finish the jura . Thursday?

Carl

Shane smiled. All right! He texted Carl after checking his day planner, show in Oxford next Saturday class at five on friday, show round the corner.

“Let’s do it”.

Out the door, and eyes open in delight – it’s just started snowing!

Robert started his journey home in a terrible mood. Today he had been working with the stand-in anchor who did his job perfectly well, but Robert was convinced he was just in it to expose his cheekbones. He was hating the dullness of his job.

The snow falling outside the bus as it stood stuck in traffic was soothing him though. He decided to check his emails. Nothing interesting or urgent but what was this? Phil? Open? Scan scan scan. Climate change.

Phil had gotten funding to do two years worth of filming for a series on anthropogenic threats to wild species which were greater than climate change.

Robert faltered. He made himself look at the snow. He hated anything to do with climate change because it was something he knew even less to do with then war, or nukes, or world hunger.

This was interesting though. He made himself read the supporting documents, glad that he had accepted the upgrade to his phone. It looked all right. The science was there and Phil was an amazing director.

But what about the experiment? Scan scan scan. Starting four months with meetings before in… London. He paused. Four months? Look at your bank account a voice dared him, that same voice which he knew was his real creative self.

He logged in.4 months. Password. Loading. He smiled. He could do that.

He replied to Phil – “it sounds like a project I would love to do. I need to get a grip on climate change but I don’t know how. Available to start in June.”

Letter to work “I regret to inform you that I have received an offer I cannot refuse. Please accept this as my resignation letter and I hope to discuss the terms of my resignation with you at the soonest possible opportunity.

Yours sincerely,

Robert Lowell.”

He got home and sat in the lounge and wished he had a cigar. He knew Luke had King Crimson though so put on Court of the Crimson King and poured himself a big glass of wine.

To be on the road again! And at least three months to dedicate to the experiment! He wrote Curtis an email saying if it all went well on Wednesday that he would be able to help with the selection process.

All was well. He might as well cook, he felt like aubergine for some reason. It must be because he never seemed to have them when filming. Were there any? Two-excellent. Melanzane it was, done slowly with salt.

Luke was driving again. It seemed he was always driving, but this time he was enjoying the long journey to pronounce someone else dead because he was thinking.

He was thinking about a discussion he had last night after getting home and finding Robert all cheerful with supper done and then climbing into bed with Roo.

She had been talking about the experiment and how all of them would need to find something they were passionate about. She had done some searching over the weeks before and decided she would be a stuck record about growing her own food and find a course where they would let her be filmed for bits of it.

Then she asked him what he had always dreamed of doing and he said he’d always wanted to be a paramedic and she had stared at him. And? She had asked. Just a paramedic he had said.

There had been a long pause. What about sustainable building? She asked. Luke shook his head and said that was just a phase.

What about nukes? She had asked. Luke had shook his head again and said he was out of the loop. She had said he’d get back in the loop. He had said no.

She had turned around and turned the light off saying softly – you have to think of your message- you can’t just be a husband who saves lives, you need an unrequited passion which you can explore. Then she had quickly kissed him and turned over, pretending to sleep until she actually was.

It had been quite strange. She had never shut him out before but he also knew she was not nagging him. It had been disquieting but it had made him realise, especially after listening to Robert say he was going to dedicate three months to setting it up, that the experiment was actually going to probably happen.

So what did he stand for? Clean water for everyone they all need to stand for that. Good quality food for everyone -likewise.

He thought back to the war zones he had worked in. What had bothered him the most? The buildings? No. The agriculture? A little but no.

He tried to remember crying. It was difficult – he had blacked it out, but he was stuck at a red light so he waited.

He remembered crying when he was helping his first amputation. He remembered crying after seeing chemical burns from an explosion.

His heart started to ache and he knew. The shrapnel. Some kids had survived their parents after one of those terrible bombs which let go metal shards. They stayed in the hospital for a month as they had no adult to take them home but had refused to leave.

He started thinking of numbers and why Robert had said they all needed vasectomies. It’s the orphans! He thought I want all the worlds orphans to be adopted! His heart was still tender as he pulled over as they had arrived.

Rhian woke up from his dozing at the back and started collecting the things they needed. Luke sat perfectly still for a moment and then fished around his backpack for his phone to text Roo.

Roo woke up the next morning with Luke lying next to her sleeping. She picked up the phone and turned the alarm off. She tried to wake up herself mornings after Luke was working, as she didn’t like waking him up.

Today they would find out about the location. Then she would have to text Shane. Maybe he had some alternatives if things don’t work out. She hoped they would – she liked Curtis.He was interesting and he would help her with presenting herself as he would help her know how to have downtime.

She looked at her phone. Message from Luke. She looked across at him and realised she could read it in the kitchen. Stumbling around in the dark, she found clothes and shoes and underwear for the day. Then she quietly left and closed the door behind her.

She got dressed and did her hair and got ready for work, putting her pyjamas in the laundry basket. She really liked the systems in this house, things seems to work, she wondered if things were scalable, they must be.

She put the coffee on the stove and remembered the text. She sat down and read “love, I want all the orphans adopted to good parents.”

She smiled. She knew he had forgotten to specify the world. She looked at her phone- there was time to make him some apple and cinnamon muffins. She was glad she was working today otherwise she would spend the whole day fidgeting. Luke’s got his thing. That was great. She put the muffins in the oven- now to find an introductory food growing course she could do.

Robert had a message from Curtis but he had decided to read it with Roo and Luke. Now he sat in the waiting room in south London, waiting to see his psychotherapist. He had decided to go through with his therapy until he left as it felt manageable to do for four months.

He had asked Sasha for advice again and she had told them about all the different therapies and then when she had finished had asked – so what is most important to you about therapist?

That they don’t tell me what to do he had said, distrusting that any of the complicated modalities would be able to provide that. There’s a few she had said, but if you actually wanted to sort yourself out I’d recommend Patricia Toynbee or anyone she recommends. Then she looked at him and passed him her phone which was ringing and he had asked some questions and eventually booked this appointment.

So here he was. He was glad Sasha had kind of sprung the actual calling on him and he’d had her to nod too while he asked questions and got asked far more.

The door opened and a woman in a purple dress, purple coat and purple shoes stepped out. She had red hair. She looked at him smiling “Robert?” She asked.

Robert nodded and stood up. So this was someone who knew his name. “I’m Janice. Come in. Patricia referred you to me as I like having clients for shorter times and understand if you want to take things gently but then you need to commit to a longer course of therapy.” They were in a comfortable white room- so much for being able to get distracted by trees.

Robert faltered and then said “I will be filming about anthropogenic threats to endangered species that all climate change for two years So only have until June to do therapy”.

Janice picked up a notebook and a pen and then her diary. “Until June you say? Could you do three times a week?” Robert smiled “ yes am flexible with time from the week after next”.

Janice nodded and made a note in her diary. She looked at Robert with a bit of a squint. “Do you want to do that many sessions a week? Some people believe in doing therapy five days a week but I find three or four times to work just as well and it gives a bit more time to processing whats come up. I’m quite extensive and demanding as a therapist.

Robert nodded “how do you mean?”

Janice smiled. “I expect people to take the therapy seriously. If you spend more than five sessions moaning, and don’t do the reflective work, I will ask you to stop coming to see me.”

Robert smiled. “So you want me to do homework and do what you say?” He might get out of this after all even though there was something he liked about this colourful woman in a bland room.

“Homework yes, tell you what to do no. I do expect that you listen to me but I try not to make any suggestions though I do set experimental tasks sometimes. Which you can not do if you do not feel comfortable or ready to do them. I’ll push you – from the very beginning, but you will have a week to think about things and do the first introductory essay. I know writing doesn’t work for everyone though – do you feel comfortable writing? 750 to 2000 words Robert? Just for me to read- I destroy all information on a client after they have stopped seeing me. I have strict confidentiality. So I promise I will never turn you into an example client.”

Robert looked at the ground. He thought about what she had been saying and then looked up, realising this was a real process. “Can we see how it goes?”

Janice smiled “of course we can. That’s the best approach to take. I will try press your buttons though. Are you ready for that?” Robert folded his arms and look at her shoes and then nodded and put his arms down again.

Janice started talking about money, which was in his budget and then started asking him questions. Her demeanour changed when she started asking questions. She became softer and more still. He felt no pressure to answer quickly which he was grateful for. Time passed and then he said he was asexual. She nodded “is something you would like to explore?” She asked quietly. There was silence for a long time. “I don’t know. I’m quite happy being asexual but recently I found myself thinking how it would be to be in love with someone if I wasn’t.”

Janice poured herself a glass of water and had a sip. “I’m going to be honest with you. Most people I see have a life that has them overwhelmed. After you finish this notice period, you will be doing work you like. You also have good friends who you are doing what you call the experiment with, which is interesting as it does seem like something you would expect professional artists to do - not a primary school teacher and two people who worked in war zones. But your asexuality is interesting. It seems the experiment is dredging up your unconscious. I am still going to go over the basics with you though. So your first challenge is to write on your first 10 years of life. A lot can go into it but just see what’s on the surface and then if there is more just make bullet points. You can email it to me or bring it 15 minutes early and I will read it before I see you. Either is all right.” She took another sip of water. “How does that sound Robert?”

Robert nodded “all right.” He said.

Janice looked at her watch and smiled and stood up “pleasure to meet you. I will see you next Wednesday the same time then.”

Robert smiled “thank you.” He said and then let himself out.

He found himself in a bit of a daze for a while but eventually realised he was on the underground going in the right direction. He took his phone out and read the message from Curtis. They had it! Wow! That was such great news. He drafted a text as soon as he was out of the station and sent it to Luke and Roo. The suspense must be killing them too. What a great day! Luke texted back that he was making the chicken and Robert smiled. Things really are alright in my life on the whole He thought and wondered again if he should get cigars and realised champagne or cava would be better.

Shane sat waiting for Carl, with burgers on the go. He had received a voicemail from Roo, and it seemed the experiment was actually becoming a reality.

Carl buzzed and Shane went to let him in. He had a vinyl bag with him and so he knew he was in for a session of sorts, even though there was only one turntable. Carl seemed to be taking this all quite seriously.

He made the burgers as Carl put on some smooth but somehow jagged jazz Shane had never heard. They ate listening and then Carl turned the record over and it was just nature sounds blended with some hints of synths.

“Is it really the same band?”

“No it’s a split, but just done so well and the production is great. I looked up the people that run this company and these days they seem to spend their life making cheese.”

“Did we talk about a record label?”

“Yes, an artist led record label with trustees. I would like the cheesemakers as trustees. And these artists do the tours when they can.”

“ It really is an as they can kind of thing with music now. Only the big artists make any money from the music, the rest of us just tour, which sometimes is a gamble if you don’t presale tickets. The venues are demanding that a lot now though.”

“Do you remember about the tour?”

“Sort of -doing community building and music at the same time. Maybe even having screenings of interesting films. I wanted to set up presencing hubs.”

“That’s right. You will have to explain to me how it works.”

“I will. I can make a presentation when I talk to Roo, Luke, and Robert about this with the mysterious Curtis.”

“So you are seriously thinking of joining. Let’s have some whiskey shall we?”

“Good idea. Yes. I’m considering it. They have gotten the use of building which they are looking at on Saturday – when I would have to present. I think they’re starting to look for people – so I don’t have much time to consider.”

“We don’t have much time to consider.”

“We? Are you thinking of joining too?”

“If she’ll have me and we can do the label and the tour. It will be good for her to have one husband that doesn’t need sex from her.”

“But you would like to make love to her.”

Carl blushed through his brown skin. “I, well, I really just want her to lie on my bed and listen to records with her. And maybe have a cuddle every now and then.”

Shane smiled gently “you love her to.”

Carl nodded. “I would like to help her relax. I could learn massage if there was money to do that.”

Shane laughed, “yes, and so she’ll spend all our time with you!”

“You know I can play records for everyone sometimes too. But I really think it’s important. I can stay with my nan for two nights a week just to check on her. I will still want to work in the shop at least part-time.”

“We’ll have to see how things go. If you want to do it, I’ll definitely will do it because I know that two of us can work well together.”

“Do you remember the name of the record label?”

“No it’s gone.”

“It’s of the birds.”

“Blimey, this is serious then. Let me phone Roo about Saturday then.”

Luke lay on the bed in their room and was concentrating on his body. It was a weird technique someone had taught him to see if there was trapped or unprocessed emotion.

Roo had been so happy after talking to Shane, and then Carl, who he had only met in passing. She said they had a music -related scheme they wanted to present and that they both wanted to be with her in the experiment, if she was happy with the fact they were straight.

Luke had suddenly realised it was real and soon they would be more people that transcended the role of suiter or friend. He was scanning his body for signs of jealousy but the only thing he could find was relief.

If they had really come up with the project to use the experiment for it sounded like it might actually be interesting. He has been thinking about the orphans and he had no idea how you talk about the whole time without starting a charity. The problem with the charity is what exactly would it do?

He was realising that he had to shift his mind from being a worker to something else. It wasn’t an artist but that’s more how it was. He was going to be creating not just being productive.

He concentrated on his heart for a moment, and it seemed less tense than the last time he had done this exercise a month before. That suspension had really helped change gears. Gears, he suddenly thought – do I think of myself as a machine?

That was troubling. He was listening to his heart beating and realised a cat would never think it was changing gears when the seasons changed. He would have to explore this a little. Maybe he needed to change the words he used to describe what he did and thought from that of the man-made world to that of the rest of the world. He could assimilate and metabolise and grow and age.

Roo finished the dishes. Luke had disappeared since she had talked to Shane and Carl. She felt a whirlwind of emotions but when she was done she sat down at the computer and booked the nearest food growing course. She would have to learn about the styles and pretensions of growing and make sure they covered stuff it didn’t explicitly say or talk about.

She started reading her emails and then instead of going into a daze she turned it off and went to find Luke. Opened the door and realised he had been doing a body scan again as he was spreadeagled. He seemed to do that when he was stressed.

“Busy?” She asked.

“Well I’m thinking about how I use language which describes me as a machine.”

Roo smiled and closed the door and started slowly taking her clothes off.

“And you are thinking you don’t want to self identify as a machine.”

“No, I want to be a human being in all senses of the word.”

She stood there naked before him and continued. “With this human thinking disappear at the idea of being enclosed by this human feeling?”

“Not if you keep talking love.”

She took off his shoes and then climbed on top of him to undo his belt buckle, slowly easing his jeans off while she hummed.

“You are no longer a producing machine.” She said as she helped and take his shirt off and now they were both bare. She kissed him and he held her pulling up the bed from sitting until she was lying on top of him. “You need to tell me what you want to do as a human creature.” She slid down and then felt between his legs delighted to find he was hard. She slid him inside and then started slowly rocking. “I need you to tell me because I just want to make babies with you and we’re not going to. We are going to be completely impractical in our lovemaking, so tell me.” She said placing his hands on her bum, moving delicately now.

“I want to breathe with your nipples in my mouth and eat and shit and age and explore.”

“And.”

“I want to try love many people and have sex with men again but still sleep with you at least half the time. I want to learn how to create instead of produce and to live rather than function. Oh you feel so good!”

“So you don’t want to be my master, or my king, or my operating system.”

“And I don’t want you to be my slave, my Queen, or my remote control.”

They were both breathless now, and stayed breathless for a long time, though talking less and less until the moon shone in and they realise they had forgotten to close the curtains.

Carl and Shane had spent the whole of Thursday working out how to present their plan. After a shift at the shop on Friday he had caught a bus after nearly slipping when he tried to catch it.

His grandmother was out with her friends playing whist, or bridge, or something else – he could never remember what Friday was for. He sat in the sitting room with a cup of tea, soaking in the silence.

He loved this house even though it should really have more than two people living in it. His grandmother had inherited it from her parents as she was the youngest by far after everyone else had passed away during or after World War II.

She had been born near impossibly and never lived anywhere else except a Hopi Reservation in Arizona where she was doing her anthropology degree.

She had definitely been spoiled but she expected very little of him except someone to talk to in the dark of winter and to check on her when she got ill. In winters she rattled round the house in frustration at the weather and would cook opulent meals quite often out of boredom.

He had recently been asking about his grandfather who he knew had been seduced by or had seduced his grandmother while she was there for what ended up being two years before her mother had gotten ill she had come home. So Carl’s mother was born out of ‘proper’ wedlock but his mother had fared all right in London growing up because she had gotten letters from her father so she had felt all right.

She had had him out of wedlock too, though but she had never really told much about his father, except that he needed to be careful about drinking too much. He followed this advice by not really drinking but going overboard every now and then, though he knew binge drinking really wasn’t actually a good idea.

He had been asking about his grandad, because he was a loved male even though he had stopped writing as often and after his mother’s death in a car crash. He had since begun to get strange dreams with chanting and fires in them and his grandmother said it was his ancestors.

Since then she been single-mindedly teaching him about the Hopi and kept bringing him books she bought, photocopied from some or other university library. She had become an expert on the sacred and but hardly touched anything about the Hopi past her PhD.

She had fallen in love with a jazz musician who was very jealous – who she had eventually broken it off with because he was pawning things from her parents’ home. By the end of that symbolism was very much in vogue, but she felt more comfortable not cheapening symbolism which wasn’t part of her culture. So she was enjoying this re-examining with the same passionate fervour she normally reserved these days for birthday cakes, which she made so beautiful someone had actually cried when they cut it.

Now Carl sat in the kitchen eating leftovers and then he went to bed, surrounded by books, and photocopies and records and he waited for strange dreams at night but instead it was deep, dark dreamless, refreshing sleep and woke up in the morning ready to see a building it seemed he might live in.

Shane woke up to the piercing sound of the alarm. All his work reflexes started to quiver and he realised with the start that it was the day they would see the new building. He stopped the alarm and found his dressing gown. Time for a shave in the shower and a trip to get coffee. There was time to go over his notes on the bus.

At the coffee shop it was quite quiet still and as he sat waiting for Carl his phone rang. It was Roo. “Hello darling.”

“Hi, we’re just checking everything is fine, didn’t know if you’re playing last night.”

“Yes we did but it was local and I could excuse myself. Just waiting for Carl – his bus stops around the corner so I’m just having my coffee fix. Its still at 12?”

“Yes – you will be in plenty of time. Curtis is having a picnic for us in the building and the owner wants to meet us on video chat though he said should be happy just to know what we think and meet her if we were happy with everything.”

“Yes that’s a lot for one day”.

Carl walked in, waved and then went to get a coffee. “Oh good Carls just arrived, will be on our way shortly .”

“Grand. Looking forward to seeing you again and while we’re on the phone. Luke is working next weekend and suggested I spend it with you two. What do you think?”

Shane felt his pulse rise a little and then laughed . “You’d have to go back on Monday and we haven’t had vasectomies and tests yet so it really would be like old times. We have a show in Sheffield on Saturday. Would you be happy to come along on the train? There won’t be space in the bus for you to but I can happily travel with you.”

“Isn’t that expensive?”

“I can book it before we go if you’re keen.”

“I would love that.”

“Oh good, well lets do it then. Will talk to Carl. I don’t think he’ll stay the night but he can probably get off work if he is on.”

“It will be lovely. I got your new album- its really good.”

“Better you mean.” Shane said laughing. “Yes we found our sound now and the new guitarist really knows what he’s doing.”

“But if you happy to book the tickets.”

“Yes I am. See you at 12. I am nervous about presentation but maybe the boss lady should see it too.”

“I think Curtis has it all set up.”

“All right. Lights camera action all that.”

“See you soon. I’m looking forward to what you come up with.”

“You two. Bye darling Roo.”

“Bye.”

Carl was sitting watching him. “So what’s this about Sheffield and Roo?”

“She’s spending next weekend with us!”

Carl nodded smiled and then blushed, but it was so imperceptible Shane didn’t even notice as he was just smiling and smiling while looking out of the front of the cafe.

Robert, Roo and Luke arrived at the In and Out [RvS1] at 11:55 exactly. Robert was carrying his camera after Roo had told him about Shane and Carl being happy to have the presentation filmed. His plan was to make a good little film of today to show their benefactor and the new recruits once they appeared.

They looked at the building and Robert realised he needed to start filming straight away. He turned to Roo and Luke and said “I need to film the whole of today?” They looked at each other, shrugged and then nodded to Robert. They knew it was right so they took out their phones and texted Curtis and Shane. When they looked up Robert was already filming the building in the cold early March light. He turned and they both smiled and waved and then walked up to the building’s entrance, through the drive way and up to the front door.

“It really is a big pile of stone,” Luke said and Roo nodded and before they had time to knock Shane had the door open for them and was smiling, giving Roo a kiss on the cheek and Luke a hug.

Curtis had led them through into a beautiful big white room with a bevelled ceiling. There were chairs stacked but on the floor were a whole bunch of embroidered[RvS2] beanbags on top of the most magnificent orange carpet and Chinese turning tables full of steaming food. Carl passed around some plates and Robert sat down after wondering around filming people dish up and turned off the camera.

They all ate in silence. Curtis had obviously organised for the heating to be put on because it was a lovely mellow temperature and they were all comfortable and the food was that type of deliciousness Curtis seemed to specialise in, but even more subtle and honest [RvS3] than what they had eaten before. They had all finished when Curtis asked “And, would you like to meet the chef?”

They all nodded and smiled and Curtis went off for a moment. He came back in with a svelte 6 foot 4 African man who’s skin was so dark it shone.

“This is Luther everybody and while you don’t know him he has something to say to you.”

“Good afternoon. “ And he went around introducing himself. Curtis magically found him a beanbag to sit on. “My name is Luther.I come from the Congo DRC. I trained as a doctor in Cuba but now I live looking after Mrs Godolphin as she gives me time to write and a visa. She told me of the experiment and asked me to cook for you. I thought about it for a few days and then asked if she would mind if I asked to join the experiment. I know you are looking for couples but I see you have accepted two straight men so I thought it was alright to try. I want to speak of colonialism but not just that of the state, that of the multinational corporations that rule so many countries in Africa, but also in the rest of the world. I want to write books and organise for a system where the corporations are not subsidized by the government. I would also like to work part time in an A and E department again. I like Mrs Godolphin but I have done my research now and I can see that creating new media is important. I would like to publish books and while I know we will have to be delicate with the programming, it would be possible to invite authors to talk to us. I know you are making a spectacle. We know all about the French in my country! It will be delicate but I would like to be part of it.”

He looked at Roo. “I can understand why you would want couples, so it would not be too much pressure on you. I had a wife in Cuba but since then I haven’t found a woman I could love as she passed away from Ovarian cancer. I know I could learn to love you however and I will be busy working much of the time. To share a bed with you a night a week would be all I could ask for and so I can remember how miners live at least a little. I am happy to have no children but this house is big and there will be many fathers so I ask that if you accept me that you will not only adopt 2 children from Syria but another 2 from my country which has seen war. I do not know how it can be done but I think you would have to marry one of us and adopt the children before the show began. I would be happy to look after the two from my country if anything went wrong so I would ask to be their guardian from the beginning. I have much else to say but I have spoken for now. Please consider me.”

He stood up and left.

There was silence but Roo was crying softly. She looked at Curtis and struggled to speak, and then slowly opened her mouth. “He will have to marry one of you so the children know he is their father and so he has a visa.

Carl lifted his hand, “I will do that if he is comfortable with that”.

Roo rushed up and hugged Carl. She turned around and looked at Luke and Shane. They nodded. “It is right,” Luke said, his voice a little gravely.

Shane looked at his hands and smiled. “Four children! It was just incredible. It would be an interesting house to live in!” He looked up and smiled when he realised everyone was looking at him. “Oh Roo! You know I love kids! I can play music with them in the afternoons!”

Roo wiped her eyes and then Robert swooped in with a tissue to tidy up her mascara and she smiled. “Should we tell him?”

Curtis nodded. “It’s time for the presentation and he should see it.” He walked out smiling and came back with a beaming Luther. They all got up and took turns hugging him now. They chatted for a while and Luther said he didn’t mind sharing a bed with Carl as long as he had a study he could sleep in too. And they all laughed.

Luther asked if they wanted some mint tea while Shane and Carl set up for the presentation and disappeared to the kitchen with Roo to prepare it. She was delighted at the kitchen and Luther told her how the whole property was completely off grid and they would get delivered wood once a month from Mrs Godolphin’s coppiced woodland.

While they were waiting for the kettle to boil he motioned for her to smooth her hair and Roo did and then found herself reaching out and putting her hand on his cheek.

“Can I kiss you to check?” Roo asked hesitantly. Luther smiled and nodded and as there was no self-consciousness between them they gathered together and slowly dissolved into each other.

When they came out 10 minutes later Roo was glowing and her hair was neat.

I don’t want your revolution if I can’t dance

Luke looked at her and smiled and then ever so slightly nodded at Luther, who nodded back sheepishly. Robert was talking to Shane with Carl fiddling on the side. They all looked at Roo when she brought them tea and smiled.

“Ready then?” she asked.

They nodded and then moved the beanbags no one was sitting on to make it easier to see. Curtis said to Luther when he brought his tea. “Are you sure about this?” Luther nodded and smiled. “It will make a change and it will be good to be back in A and E.[RvS4] I don’t have any more books to write for a while. Shane said, “All right everyone. Has everyone got tea?”

They all chimed yes and went to sit down. Robert set up the camera at the back with his tea on the floor and then gave the thumbs up before returning to it. Carl had set up the video projector while Roo and Luther had gotten the tea and now sat right at the back with his finger hovering above the mousepad of his laptop.

Shane looked at him and nodded and the screen turned into three huge icebergs visible above and below water. Shane took a deep breath, looked at Roo who smiled wholeheartedly at him and then started “There are three main icebergs to today’s problems. The Eco, social and spiritual divide. The problems that are at their roots, that which is the bulk of the iceberg overlap, but they include things like bubbles, finite resources, real needs and economy, collective paralysis and so on.[RvS5] The bubbles include the infinite growth bubble, income, financial, technology, leadership, consumerism, governance and ownership bubbles. The Ecological divide is best explained by Earth Overshoot Day which gets closer to summer solstice every year and the fact that we are losing agricultural land because of overuse. The social divide is also obvious - 2 ½ billion people live on less than $2 a day while the top 1% has a greater worth than the bottom 90%.

The spiritual cultural divide is more about the discontent most people feel about their work and what they do and best exemplified by the World Health Organisation statistic that in the year 2000 more people died of suicide than war. In this country we know that suicide is the biggest killer of under 35 year old men.

So what do we do to solve these problems? Move from Ego economies to Eco economies and start listening to people. There is more of this theory and I suggest that we all do their free MOOCas I find theory U Lab very inspiring and after getting Carl to do it too we have come up with what will be the bulk of our presentation.”

The slide changed. It was a picture of a festival. Carl smiled at Shane and walked to the front to start with Shane after getting Roo to take over on the laptop.

“So we were talking,” Carl said, “and drinking. Because I was overwhelmed by the experiment.”

“And we started to throw some ideas around. I work in a record store and Shane is the vocalist for a blues band so naturally we started talking about music”

“Yeah, so we were talking about distribution and how difficult it is to know what is good and then Carl says - what if you had a record label that was a cooperative of musicians with really good but unknown artists as its trustees?”

“So Shane starts going on about how that is not really interesting enough. Because by this stage he wants to change the world.”

Shane laughed self-consciously and Carl continued “So Shane says - I want people to learn theory U in groups and then change their communities. So I say why stop there - teach them about the media, and other interesting things too and then we both stopped and looked at each other and said - a tour!”

“Then we talked rubbish for a while and went to bed.”

“But I know Shane was and is actually serious about this and I always liked Roo so I left him a message in the morning to say we should meet up on Thursday.”

“So we did. With the rest of the whiskey and worked it out. We would have street teams like people did and still do have for shows. The street teams would have to do training and get people involved through a battle of the bands. The winner of the battle of the bands would get to play the home show on the tour and get their demo listened to by the record label and the tour would be more like a festival for a week in a town with films and workshops. We would do 6 weeks a year of the tour and that’s good because it will be so fun people could volunteer for a lot of it.

“And that’s what we want to do.”

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saganlife · 7 months

Text

Backpacking is a thrilling outdoor activity that allows you to connect with nature, explore remote wilderness areas, and challenge your physical and mental limits. Whether you’re an experienced backpacker or just starting, one crucial aspect of your adventure is ensuring a safe and reliable source of clean water. Water is essential for hydration and survival. Natural water sources, such as rivers, streams, and lakes, can be contaminated with bacteria, parasites, viruses, and other impurities. Consuming untreated water in the wild can lead to serious health issues like gastrointestinal infections, diarrhea, or worse. Therefore, ensuring a safe and reliable source of drinking water is paramount.

Reasons why proper water purification is essential for backpackers:

Health and Safety: Contaminated water can contain harmful microorganisms like Giardia, E. coli, and Cryptosporidium, which can lead to severe illnesses. Clean water is essential for staying healthy and safe while out on the trail.

Convenience: Carrying large quantities of water from home can be heavy and impractical, especially for longer backpacking trips. Having access to water sources on the trail and purifying them as needed is more convenient and efficient.

Environmental Impact: By purifying water from natural sources, you reduce the need for disposable plastic water bottles and minimize your environmental footprint. Backpacking responsibly means leaving a minimal trace on the environment.

Cost-Efficiency: Reusable water purification methods can save you money in the long run, as you won’t have to continuously buy bottled water or pre-treated water.

Versatility: With the right water purification system, you can confidently explore remote and less-traveled areas where clean water sources may not be readily available.

Choosing the Right Water Purification Method

Boiling Water: Boiling is one of the oldest and most effective methods for purifying water. It kills bacteria, parasites, and viruses by raising the water’s temperature to a boiling point (212°F or 100°C) and maintaining it for at least one minute. In high-altitude areas, you may need to boil the water for longer due to lower boiling points at higher altitudes.

Pros:

– Effectively eliminates all harmful pathogens. – Requires only basic equipment (a stove and pot). – No chemical taste or odors in the purified water.

Cons:

– Time-consuming. – Requires a reliable heat source and fuel. – Heavier and bulkier compared to some other methods. – Not ideal for large quantities of water.

Water Filters: Water filters are mechanical devices that physically remove bacteria, protozoa, and larger particles from water. They work by forcing water through a porous material or a filter media, such as ceramic, glass fiber, or a hollow-fiber membrane. The filtered water is then safe to drink. The Sagan Life® XStream Straw Water Purifier product uses the popular and effective Journey™ Filter to purify water from any non-salt water source.

Pros:

– Efficient and quick purification. – Lightweight and portable. – Suitable for larger quantities of water. – Many options available, from pump filters to gravity filters™ (such as the DuraFlo Filter).

Cons:

– May not remove viruses (unless specifically called out. In the interests of full disclosure, the Journey™ Filter DOES remove 99.99 percent of virus, plus other contaminants). – Filter cartridges require occasional replacement. – Prone to clogging in turbid water sources. – Initial investment and maintenance costs.

Water Purification Tablets and Drops: Water purification tablets and drops contain chemical agents, such as chlorine dioxide or iodine, which kill or neutralize harmful microorganisms in water. You add the tablets or drops to the water, wait a specified amount of time, and the water becomes safe to drink.

Pros:

– Lightweight and extremely portable. – Effective against a wide range of pathogens. – No special equipment required. – Long shelf life.

Cons:

– Chemical taste or odor in treated water. – Some people may be sensitive to chemical treatments. – Ineffective against certain impurities like heavy metals. – Requires waiting time for purification.

UV Water Purifiers: UV (ultraviolet) water purifiers use UV light to disrupt the DNA of microorganisms in water, rendering them harmless. These devices are often compact and battery powered.

Pros:

– Fast and effective water purification. – No chemical taste or odor. – Lightweight and portable. – Can be used with clear water sources.

Cons:

– Requires a power source (usually batteries). – Ineffective in murky or turbid water. – May not remove particulate matter or chemicals. – Initial investment and battery replacement costs.

Chemical Filtration: Chemical filtration combines a filter with a chemical element, such as activated carbon. These filters physically remove large particles, while the chemical component absorbs contaminants like chlorine, pesticides, and heavy metals.

Pros:

– Effective against a wide range of impurities. – Reduces chemical taste and odors in water. – Lightweight and portable. – Suitable for various water sources.

Cons:

– Limited in removing microorganisms (unless specified). – Filter cartridges may require replacement. – Slower filtration compared to standard water filters. – Some models can be relatively expensive.

Factors to Consider When Choosing a Water Purification Method

Now that you’re familiar with the various water purification methods available, it’s essential to consider several factors when deciding which one is best for your backpacking adventure. Here are the key factors to keep in mind:

Water Source and Quality:

– Consider the types of water sources you’ll encounter on your trip (rivers, lakes, streams, etc.). – Assess the water quality and potential contaminants in the area you plan to explore.

Trip Duration:

– Shorter trips may require less water purification than longer ones. – Consider the number of days you’ll be in the wilderness and the quantity of water you’ll need to purify daily.

Weight and Portability:

– Evaluate the weight and bulkiness of the purification method. – Decide if you need a lightweight and compact solution for ultralight backpacking or if you can carry a slightly heavier system for added features. Be aware that the Sagan Life® XStream Straw Deluxe and Basic models, plus the new RapidFlo Survival Straw Filter are all extremely lightweight and easy to pack into a backpack, bike pack or rucksack without issues.

Ease of Use:

– Determine your comfort level with each purification method. – Consider how straightforward the method is to use in various weather conditions and terrains.

Effectiveness:

– Review the method’s ability to eliminate the specific pathogens and impurities you may encounter in your chosen destination. – Ensure the method is suitable for your needs and the water quality you expect.

Speed of Purification:

– Think about how quickly you need access to clean water. – Some methods may require longer processing times than others.

Taste and Odor:

– Consider your preference for the taste and odor of purified water. – Some methods, like chemical treatments, may impart a noticeable taste or smell to the water.

Maintenance and Durability:

– Research the maintenance requirements of the chosen purification method. – Assess the durability and longevity of the equipment, including the need for filter replacements or battery changes.

Cost:

– Set a budget for your water purification system. – Account for any ongoing costs, such as replacement filters or chemical treatments.

Versatility:

– Determine whether the method is suitable for various water sources and conditions. – Think about the adaptability of the system to different trip scenarios.

Maintenance and Safety Tips

Regardless of the water purification method you choose, it’s crucial to follow proper maintenance and safety guidelines to ensure the effectiveness of your system and safeguard your health:

Read the Instructions: Familiarize yourself with the manufacturer’s instructions for your chosen water purification method. Understanding how to use the equipment correctly is essential for your safety.

Regular Maintenance: If your purification method involves replaceable filters or cartridges, be diligent about replacing them according to the manufacturer’s recommendations. Neglecting maintenance can compromise the system’s effectiveness.

Clean Water Sources: Whenever possible, choose clear and running water sources for purification. Murky or stagnant water can clog filters and reduce the effectiveness of the method.

Carry Backup Purification: For longer trips or in areas with unreliable water sources, it’s a good idea to carry a backup purification method. This ensures you always have a reliable way to treat water.

Practice Proper Hygiene: Wash your hands before handling water purification equipment and after handling potentially contaminated water sources to prevent cross-contamination.

Store Equipment Properly: After your trip, clean and store your water purification equipment as per the manufacturer’s instructions. Storing it properly helps maintain its effectiveness and longevity.

Conclusion

Choosing the best water purification method for backpacking is a critical decision that can greatly impact the safety and enjoyment of your outdoor adventure. By considering factors such as water source, trip duration, weight, and personal preferences, you can select the method that suits your needs best.

As you embark on your backpacking adventure, stay hydrated, respect the environment, and enjoy the beauty of the great outdoors with the confidence that you can rely on your chosen water purification system to provide you with safe and refreshing water throughout your journey. Happy trails!

#backpacking water filter #camping water filter #portable water filters and purifiers #xstream water filter #portable water purifier for camping

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verodicia · 7 months

Text

Dream

I was in a diner with stackmates, Jack and Abel. Jeremy is running late. We were in a big comfy booth with an American style pot of coffee to share.

Abel had marshmallows and toast, and was stuffing his face. He's a werewolf, and has a ravenous appetite. Jack is drinking coffee, black, and eyeing my cup as I pour what he considers to be disgusting amounts of "cream" into it.

Abel is like Lycan, crossed with the Diablo 2 druid. Jack is like Silas (Neil Gaiman's The Graveyard Book) crossed with Nightstalker and Phantom Assassin, but at the same time bears a lightness, like Skywrath Mage. Jeremy is able to transform like Undying, and cast tombstone, but also does expert chemical, explosive things, like Alchemist, Ogre Magi and Techies.

I'm writing up a list of ingredients i'll need for a summoning spell and Abel offers to get some leaves off a plant I'll neeed, as he knows where some grows. Jeremy is bringing a bag of rock salt and a bottle of tequila, I suppose thats why he's late.

Abel chats and seems relaxed enough - I can tell he's excited for drama to come. Jack is looking sort of bored, but also concerned and trying to keep it to himself. He doesn't like to lose.

Several hours later, I'm standing in a massive shallow pool of water, manmade, with thin fountaining jets shooting up here and there, obscuring vision. At some points it's only between ankle and calf-deep, but in some places it comes to my waist. Risky terrain to manoeuvre in, but I hope it will give others a similar disadvantages. It's night time now, and I dont know where the guys are - we all got separated.

I can't see very far, and the fountain noise covers the splashes that enemies might make, wading toward me. I have an iron golem, but he's somewhere out there too. At least, I think to myself, its helping the guys.

I feel something watching me and I turn 360 degrees, scanning the area and squinting to try to see through the fountain spray, into the darkness. Lights in the lake floor here and there make the water glow but don't provide much in the way of extending visibility.

Then, I get a feeling from Jack, in my head. He knows where I am and is monitoring my situation: a Templar Assassin is melded, gradually sneaking up to me in the cover. He's also scouted that Abel is fighting - wrestling a giant cat beast, like Mirana's Sagan, in a large grassy lawn area half a block away. Jeremy is preparing Techies sort of shit, working my Iron Golem to assist him, over two separate cross roads of the block. He is going to make sure everything comes down, down to rubble.

Dust wont work here, because the mists from these fountaining jets of water dampen and disperse it. I have to learn to blink? or meld? right now? to stay safe long enough for Jack to finish his fight and turn off power system driving the pumps. The lights will go out too, though, he reminds me mentally, so I'll need to take that into account.

I hate expending supplies but it does feel necessary as I drink a cat potion from my inventory. My pupils turn to slivers. I can see further into the dark, and see sparkles dancing the outline of TA's meld now, luckily, too. Every time I glance away and back she is a little closer, melded again, no opportunity wasted. The team is concerned. I can feel through our mental connection that Abel has killed Mirana, and her cat, and is running toward me. Time is running out.

I'm glancing at his direction instinctively, then back in alarm but it's already too late. TA's eyes are glimmering directly into mine, face to face and less than a breath away. I see her conviction, her absolute will. I know then I'm going to die, and her blade is going to tear through my stomach. I see it like a replay that never happens, as somehow, time is slow, and I feel myself.. something like blinking, backward. Did I do that?

It not far enough though, and she follows, angry.

Then consecutively I am Forced, and plucked out of the water at the same time, teleported onto grass, TA is locked by an Atos and I know it's my old best friend, Ben, somewhere else. He's Invoker. He doesn't really care or get involved in my fights, causes, dalliances, but noted my situation and decided he could do that, since he is capable.

TA is regaining her bearings. Seeing me, she takes half a step forward, then seems to lunge in a monstrous, sinister puppetlike manner toward me. It sparks a jolt of fear, that there is something very much deeper wrong with the enemy we are facing, and I have a gravelly feeling in my stomach that there's something we've overlooked. It only lasts a splitsecond, as she flies forward and I realise Abel is here. With an inhuman leap he's barrelled into her from behind, teeth sunk deep down over her shoulder and through her back, crushing into her spine. She's still alive and conscious but helpless, in agonising, useless, torment as he begins to shake her like a wet dog toy.

Jack and I are standing on the grass at the edge of the pool, now, just sort of watching while Abel rips her to pieces. Jack is a type of amused, entertained, as Abel makes a giant corpsey mess in the water. Jack holds TA's will there in her body, so she's still alive and feeling herself in pieces.

I'm feeling a rush, but it's in more a Yuck than Fun way.. Admittedly I can be a horror in casual pubs, I'm usually by far the worst of the lot, and they'll criticise my behaviour. But when it comes to Ranked Dota, theres a subset of people - normally so chill, the absolute good guys - who become something else, when its "real competition". Were we the villains here, and was TA part of a mission to take out our party, at any cost?

#old stack #im the bad guy #ignore this dumb shit my dream diary pages are falling out so i transfer this here

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saganlifellc · 3 years

Photo

Journey Water Purifier Bottle – Blue

Drink pure water anywhere & anytime with our simple fill-and-drink, Journey water purifier bottle. Removes 99.9999% of bacteria, 99.99% virus and pathogens from any non-salt water source, for up to 250 gallons. Perfect for everyday use & outdoor trips, and isnow available at $44.99 only.

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midmorning-bomb · 3 years

Text

Play Out (day seven, free day)

Stiles barely restrains a sigh. He is actually too old for this shit.

“Yeah, Alpha Hale, that’s really not how this works. Prestige doesn’t pay the bills and my fees aren’t negotiable. They’re clearly laid out, in my fancy brochure.” He’s less successful restraining a sarcastic wave toward the colourful pamphlet.

He looks over at Derek, who is attempting to melt into the wallpaper away from his mother, embarrassed but resigned (which like, the poor dude tried to warn Stiles. Mostly with his eyebrows, but still). Leaning against the bookshelves that line the back of the office is the impassive (and hot) uncle Peter, and whether this job pans out or not, Stiles is going to be wheedling his number out of Derek.

“I’m not sure you appreciate what an affiliation with our pack means for a fledgling such as yourself. It can be very difficult to be... unknown in our world. Someone as young as you are might not understand, but we Hales have been in Beacon Hills for generations, our reputation means something here.” As much as his mother is puffing herself up, Derek is doing his best to shrink into himself.

It would be unprofessional to laugh, which typically wouldn’t stop Stiles, but it looks like Derek already has enough to deal with, and Stiles is a loyal bro, if nothing else.

“Uh huh. I’m sure I’ll stumble along somehow. But I’m busy with clients willing to pay me in actual material goods. I’m only here today as a favour to Derek, so... call me if you change your mind, I guess? Or don’t.”

He feels the wards creak and fragment as he leaves, trembling like saplings struggling in weak sun and no rain and faced with a force much greater. Rolling his eyes, he shrugs and keeps walking and doesn’t look back. He really is busy. And hungry.

Weeks later Stiles is reading The Demon-Haunted World in the overstuffed, navy velvet chair that sits in the back corner of his shop. He’s technically open, but not in the mood for company, so a gentle Go Away charm encourages all but the most determined to keep on walking. Some soul must be desperate, when the nailhead trim on the chair shimmers a flash of gold, then deep red. The front door opens, with seashell chimes tinkling overhead.

Before Derek met Stiles, he’d always been uncomfortable with the cloying skim of magic over his skin, like an intrusive shiver, too familiar. It’s a comfort now, though. He trusts Stiles and needs the tether more than ever. His hands shake as he drops into the opposite green leather chair.

“It makes weird sense that you’re a Sagan fan.”

Stiles closes his book and looks up, “You make weird sense. And I think it’s probably more ironic, given the title. I’d ask why so sour, wolf, but I guess it’s obvious.” His eyes search Derek’s until the other man closes them with a shuddering breath. “How’d it happen?”

Derek huffs a mirthless laugh, “Alpha pack. Ambushed Peter and I during a run in the preserve.”

Stiles lets out a long breath, “Well, shit. Shit that sucks. ...Where’s Peter?”

Eyes open once more, now beseeching, Derek leans forward and it’s clear he’s barely holding himself together. “I can, you know I can pay you? We just, we’re together in this now but we’re alone and I can’t—”

“Hey, hey, man, no. The fancy brochure fees are for strangers and assholes. Come on, I’ll drive us to... wherever you’re stashing your now-an-alpha-maybe-feral uncle and we’ll figure this out.”

Quickly locking up the shop with an incantation that leaves the windows dull and opaque, all magic faded, Stiles ushers Derek into his jeep, pressing a bottle of water and granola bar into his hands. “Breathe, drink, eat, drink again, and then tell me where we’re going.”

They drive in near silence, nothing but the faint haunting of the chimes that sometimes sound around Stiles. As they turn down the barely-road leading to the cottage, he turns to Derek: “So I guess it’s safe to say your mom never did get those wards fixed?”

Derek’s jaw clenches, “No. She never did.”

As much as Derek’s barely holding it together, Peter isn’t as bad as Stiles would’ve thought. No one’s died yet (aside from at least two members of an alpha pack), which is always a big plus in Stiles’ book. Well, not always.

Peter is shivering, back to the far corner, against the aged stone walls. His panicked stare wild and flickering blue and red and back again, settling into a sickly lavender. He twitches forward when they enter, lifts his head to scent and a touch of clarity returns.

“Mine?”

Stiles smiles sharply, showing more teeth than Derek thinks humans typically have, “I think I wanna get to know you first, Petey-pie.”

He loses the train of thought quickly at the pet name and turns a look part-betrayed, part-grossed out (part grateful) at Stiles.

Peter tilts his head as he studies them both, eyes being drawn more and more to Stiles’ bright gaze. It’s almost glowing. Or is it a black hole?

“You,” he shakes, trying to clear his mind and grasp his slippery thoughts as his nephew pauses his cautious step forward to look at Stiles, “you’re not a fledgling. What are you?”

The smile widens, fingers twitching at Stiles’ sides. Time to let go a little, time to shine for his wolves. The gentle chimes shift to the sound of scraping ice, the screaming howl of winter wind.

“Oh, alpha. I’m old, and I’m hungry, and I’ve been waiting a long time for the two of you to come along.”

Play Out | @haleweek

#haleofaweek #teen wolf #stiles stilinski #derek hale #peter hale #talia hale #steter #ficlet

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joonclouds · 4 years

Text

A space situation

You sigh heavily and shut your eyes. The man was so intelligent, but days like this you wonder if sometimes his brain took unpaid leave.

“My house is literally a third the size of your closet.”

If this wasn’t your house you might have found it a little bit funny. But it is your house.

Joon is your very rich very endearing sugar daddy but also very clumsy and sometimes rash in buying you whatever what he sees fit but it’s not very practical all the time.

Namjoon x Reader

Genre: It’s a fluff party guys

Word Count: 3k

Note: Quarantine can be inspiring lol

You don’t know you’re smiling, but it’s there. A tiny little smile lingering on your face as you watch the man in your kitchen from your crummy two-seater couch that barely fits into your living room.

It’s not a sight you’ll ever get used to seeing, you think, Namjoon with his designer suits and perfectly swept back hair, fumbling around in the drawers. He was wearing that new Dior shirt you had picked out for him last week.

When he’d came in to your dingy apartment, he’d removed his (probably very expensive) cufflinks and tossed them in your countertop dish.

“You shouldn’t treat your things so carelessly,” you chastised, taking them from the dish and moving them somewhere safer. Even in the cheap incandescent light, the large stones twinkle softly and you wondered how much they cost.

“They’re very pretty.”

‘What?” He’d glanced up briefly from his phone to see what you were holding. “Oh you like those? I can send them to my jeweler and get them set into earrings for you if you want.”

You nearly drop the cufflinks.

When he stands he bumps his head on an open cabinet.

He’s a bit befuddled for a moment and sends the cabinet door a look, but it quickly melts into a grin when he hears you giggle.

“Hey, don’t laugh. I’m six foot and this kitchen is literally made for someone who’s like five-nothing.”

God, you wanted to take a swim in those dimples.

You get off the couch and walk over, opening the second drawer to pull out a whisk and offer it to him.

“You’re the one who wanted to come to the dump which is my apartment, Joon.” It’s a matter-of-fact tone, but you can’t hide the twinkle in your eyes.

“I wanted to make you that dalgona coffee thing. But I don't have instant coffee at home. I didn’t know if it works with normal espresso.”

“You’re telling me you have a thirteen thousand dollar coffee machine at your place, and no instant coffee.”

Namjoon makes a face. “Instant coffee tastes like dishwater.”

You grab the bottle of instant coffee and shove it in his face.

“I love it.”

Namjoon shakes his head and grabs the glass jar from you, delivering a swift peck on your cheek.

“I love you.”

You blush, one hand going up to cup your face. To hell with butterflies in your stomach, this man truly gave the zoo a run for its money.

You’d met him while waitressing at one of those fancy fundraiser gala dinners. It paid the best, and between struggling to feed yourself and those overdue college bills, you were ready to swallow your pride and deal with the pompous crowd for a little while.

Namjoon had always thought it was a blessing he’d survived thirty three years not having broken a bone (well, he’s caused other people to break their bones, but that doesn’t count.) But that night, accidentally spilling his wine on you was the one time Namjoon ever felt truly lucky that he was a clumsy oaf.

You looked like a little deer, flustered and apologising, reaching for the nearest stack of napkins to fuss over the cuff of his jacket, when he should have been the one apologising to you. The two of you at a later point have recounted this first meeting and you still can’t believe he finds it hilarious that you were horrified, on the verge of tears because you thought he’d expect you to pay for his jacket.

Though you later understand why he’d find that funny. One thing more genuinely beautiful than his face was Namjoon’s heart. He’d insisted he book you a cab home (after understanding you didn’t have a spare shirt), and settled with your manager that you’d be taking the rest of the night off.

The next day he caught you by surprise, showing up on your doorstep in a cream cable knit sweater, and a black gift box adorned with a white camellia in hand (half out of apology, but also because he needed an excuse to see you). You’d opened the door, let out a strangled squeak and promptly slammed the door shut in his face. Later, he did get invited in when you didn’t so closely resemble a drenched version of Dobby, but it was unlikely you’d ever forget the horror of that moment.

Of course at first, your relationship was merely transactional - he paid you for your company, mostly at more of these fancy galas where he needed someone to distract the crowd while he really talked shop with the important people, and you.. well who were you, a mere mortal, to say no to that? It would get your bills paid, put food on the table, and Namjoon was kind, intelligent and not bad to look at.

Okay fine, he was great to look at.

Sure he’d been divorced once, but everyone has skeletons in their closets, right? Namjoon’s closet was three times the size of your apartment so there’d be plenty space to hide them. (Later, much later, you also become privy to the information that the guy could fuck you six ways from Sunday, but that’s besides the point… you think.)

After the parties on the way home you’d started to linger in his car. He’d walk you up the stairs of your dingy apartment complex. You hold hands, his large one dwarfing yours as the both of you walk as slowly as possible up the entire ten flights.

It was dangerous for you to walk alone, he said, but really, Namjoon wanted to talk to you a little while longer. You were nothing like he’d ever known. You were quiet. Listening. But really listening, not just waiting for your turn to talk. So different to the ditzy socialites in his circle who wanted only to talk about themselves.

Its not long before you're inviting him in for coffee - he drank your dishwater coffee quietly for the next three months before he suggested going to his place where the ‘real coffee’ was.

You fell fast, and you fell hard.

Not that you didn’t have your share of heated romances with people your age, but none of them really got you, listened to you as intently as he did when you rambled on about the inequality and hegemony of this world. You chalk it up to the fact that you’ve always been more mature than others - a result of circumstance. Not by choice, really, but it was what it was.

Namjoon always carried an air of introspection around him. Not intentionally. Many people took that for pride, but you realised quickly it was quiet confidence. He liked to listen and learn and observe.

On your coffee nights he begins to give you a glimpse of who he really is. Undoubtedly, he’s a Kim. That cool, nonchalant disposition was his battle armor. But beneath that you come to see the man who when you ask him about the telescope in the corner of his study, tells you he still entertains his childhood dream of being an astronaut. That on clear nights he likes to read Carl Sagan and look at the stars, wondering about the kind of lives they lead.

You learn he’s a great big klutz that breaks the handles off his cabinets ‘by accident’. You see the soft side that sometimes likes to read children’s books because ‘some of the best lessons in life are simple and humble ones’. And eventually the side that suddenly pulls you in closer in his sleep to his chest on rainy nights because he hates thunder. You always wake because you’re a light sleeper, but you’re glad you are, reaching up to smooth the furrow between his brows gently with a thumb before cuddling deeper into his embrace.

It’s also the first time he smiled at you. It was the week before his birthday, you’d given him a little resin keychain with little pressed wildflowers. He’d gone silent for quite a while and you didn’t know if he hated it or loved it.

“It’s a keychain.”

“Yeah.. It’s not much but I made it in a resin art workshop I went to, you have everything already and I hadn’t any idea what I could afford that you’d need-“

“You made this?” He interrupts, looking up at you.

You feel your gut shrivel. Jesus Christ. He hates it.

Immediately you move toward him to remove your offending gift. You were a Tiny Bit Hurt, but what had you been expecting with a cheap thing like that?

“If you don’t like it, it’s okay. You don’t have to use it! I just thought because you call me your little wildflower you’d like - “

You can’t finish your sentence because your face is smushed into Namjoon’s (very nice, very broad) chest as he pulls you into a crushing hug.

Horror takes over slightly and you struggle to move away. “Namjoon, I’m wearing so much foundation, and you’re in a cream Givenchy sweater - “

“I love it.”

You stop struggling. His warm breath tickles your ear, one large hand cradling the back of your head.

“You do?”

“I do. I love that you put in all this effort. You are my little wildflower. Always blooming in surprising places.’

You hug him back, nuzzling into his scent. The Givenchy sweater could wait. There was always drycleaning.

“And now I’ll have something to remind me of you wherever I go.”

When he pulls back to look at you he’s sporting not just one of those polite half smiles, but a full on beaming grin that make his eyes into smiling crescents. You get to see how deep his dimples actually are.

You swooned so hard you thought you might’ve given yourself an aneurysm.

Well, fast forward a year and here you are.

Watching the owner of a global business conglomerate make you some silly whipped coffee drink in the kitchen of your tiny apartment with water stains on the wallpaper, his diamond cufflinks sitting in a repurposed butter spread tray that held coins and keys on your countertop.

Watching your klutz boyfriends, ad he jerks the whisk at an odd angle and gets foamy coffee splattered all over the front of his white shirt.

'Joon, that’s Dior.” Your face crumples. Grabbing a towel out of the drawer, you wet it and try to dab the coffee stains off. That shirt was so expensive, it could pay your rent for three months.

You knew and had come to terms with the fact that money would always worry him far, far less than it worried you, but seeing such an expensive item go to waste would never stop making you a little bit unhappy. Well, there was more to it, but you shoved those thoughts away.

Namjoon sets the bowl down on the counter.

“It’s okay, love. I’ll just get a new one if the stains don't come off.”

You scrub harder.

After a silent moment, Namjoon puts his hands over yours to still them. “It’s not just about the shirt, is it?”

He waits for you, like he always does because he knows you need a little time. He’d wormed his way into the deepest parts of your heart, but there would always be a final little fence you had to decide to take down. He was okay with that.

After a minute, you nod. Gently, he takes the dishcloth from you and sets it aside so he can hold your hands properly. Times like these he just wants to hug you and hope that would be enough to protect you from the world. You taught him that money, as much as it solved problems, was not everything.

He puts a finger under your chin and tips it up so he can see your face.

“I just..”

“Go on.” He encourages.

“I know we’ve been through this before, but I can’t help but feel like I’m a… I’m a burden.”

Funny, considering how you two started out. The sugar baby/parent lifestyle just wasn’t for you. You were a Bad Ass Bitch who didn't need anyone, and it was important to stay on brand.

“Like, I keep being on the receiving end and sometimes I just feel like I can’t do anything for you. You spend so much money on me. The other day after we went shopping you bought me such lovely fruits to stock my fridge, and even got me a new heater for my room when it’s cold, and now you’re making me coffee because I sent you that post on Instagram and I just….

“If you didn’t have to come to my stupid old apartment you shirt would still be clean and I …“ You gesture vaguely at him and then at yourself.

“You give me so much. And well, I’m… just me.” You say finally.

Namjoon’s just been listening as you ramble, face unreadable. He;s got his business face on and you can’t tell if he’s angry with you or not.

“So you feel like you can’t do anything for me.”

You nod.

“Is that why you’ve been avoiding the topic every time I ask you to move in with me?”

You nod again.

“Look, _____. I want you to listen to me. Like really listen.” His hands move to cup your face, eyes now staring intently into yours.

“You give me something in this world no amount of money can buy. You make me feel whole. You make me feel excited that I get to do life’s most mundane things with you. Even if it involves drinking dishwater coffee.”

That last part gets a small smile out of you, so he knows you’re in the clear.

“I know you’re not used to receiving nice things, because the world hasn’t given you much of it. I hate that. What I do for you, I do with my whole heart. I will continue to want to do these things for you for as long as you’ll let me.

“And maybe if I keep doing them one day you will see how everything, everything I do for you pales terribly in comparison to what you give to me by just existing.”

You’re so overwhelmed with emotion so you just respond lamely “o..okay.”

In your head, your two braincells clap enthusiastically as they crown you honorary president of the Idiot Club.

Namjoon sighs and rests his hands on the countertop on either side of you so he can look at you eye to eye. You look so pretty like this, he thinks. Eyes vulnerable and lips soft, just like you should be. He hates the world for treating you so cruelly.

“And for the record, I insist on spending time here I noticed you’re more… yourself than at my place. I want you to feel comfortable.”

“That’s not true.” You raise your chin petulantly, because you’re slightly prideful that way and don't want to acknowledge that Namjoon sees through you clear as day.

“Don’t argue with me.”

Namjoon narrows his eyes fractionally, his gaze darkening, and suddenly you’re very aware that you’re caged in. Not that you were complaining but was it suddenly really hot in here?

“I’m not arguing.”

“Yes you are." He's lowered his voice and its taken on a huskier tone.

“You know that everything I do, I do out of love for you. And I will damn well put up with your apartment with no complaints if it means you will feel more at ease.”

This man was going to give you whiplash with the way he made the most loving words sound like filth.

You lower your gaze, just the way you know he likes, and look up at him through your lashes. Two could play that game. You see a spark ignite in his eyes.

“I know.”

“You know, what?”

“I know, sir.”

“Good. Now why don’t I finish making you that coffee, and then we can go back to my place and we’ll see what you really know.”

With that, he releases you to get the milk from the fridge, and you spin around to place one hand on the countertop and one hand over your chest. You suck in a breath you didn’t know you were holding. A few seconds longer and you’d have -

A sharp cracking noise from behind you quickly sweeps any indecent thoughts clean out of your mind.

You turn to find Namjoon looking at you with an incredibly apologetic expression, holding a black piece of plastic which what seems to be -

“Did you break the handle off my fridge?”

Three days later he’s sporting the same apologetic expression, the only difference is that you two are separated by a towering, stainless steel monstrosity that now sits in the middle of your living room, leaving you two to converse by having to look around the sides of it.

“I’m sorry, ___. I didn’t know it’d be this big.”

“That’s what she said.”

You peer around the corner with a cheeky grin. He gives you a look that’s half withering and half amused. “Mature.”

Reassessing the appliance in front of you, you throw your hands up in the air.

“For the love of sweet god, Namjoon. This fridge is ridiculous. I’m not feeding the entire village. You’ve seen my apartment, how did you think this was going to work?!”

“I dont know, okay? I just called my home decor guys and told them to send you the same fridge I have!”

You sigh heavily and shut your eyes. The man was so intelligent, but days like this you wonder if sometimes his brain took unpaid leave.

“My house is literally a third the size of your closet.”

If this wasn’t your house you might have found it a little bit funny. But it is your house.

You wait, but there’s just silence from his end, so you continue.

“What do you expect me to do with this monstrosity? Take a fucking winter holiday in it?! We can’t even -“ you kick the sofa for emphasis.

Pausing because he’s still unusually quiet, you stretch to look around the fridge again. He’s on his phone, tapping away in furious concentration.

“What are you doing?”

“Give me a minute.”

Oh no.

“What are you doing.”

“Relax, my love, I’m fixing the problem.” He waves you off nonchalantly. “Give me a minute.”

“Are you calling the delivery men to take this back?”

There is a genuinely confused look on his face when he looks up.

“What? No. Don’t be silly. I’m texting my real estate agents. They’re getting you a new house so this fridge will fit.”

#joonclouds #namjoon #bts namjoon #namjoon fluff #namjoon fic #bts fic

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setsailtomorrow · 5 years

Text

i was tagged by @mediawhorefics

rules: answer 17 questions and tag 17 people you want to get to know better (ahaaha, not 17 no)

nickname: don’t really have one, my name is short enough already!

zodiac sign: virgo ✌️

height: 166 cm

hogwarts house: slytherin, though i think it changes depending on the day.

last thing i googled: "sagan om isfolket” the 57-book series i read when i was 14-16, GOOGLE IT

song stuck in my head: nothing at this moment, but various songs from swedish music history have been popping up randomly since i watched a six part documentary on it... “moves like jagger” was written by a swede and it’s annoyingly difficult to shake.

following: 121

followers: just under 1k

amount of sleep i get: probably around 6-7 hours? i like to go to bed early, but then i end up reading fic until late either way.

lucky numbers: people do that?

dream job: pretty much what i’m doing now, produce public art

wearing: sleeveless grey denim dress, black top under, black tights

favorite songs: eh... ever? something stupidly pretentious probably, let’s just go with “Comment te dire adieu” Francoise Hardy

instruments: don’t play no

random fact: i went to the dentist today, had no cavities, felt ridiculously proud.

aesthetics: the smell of wet soil after watering plats / cat purring on a wool blanket / coffee always available / popping bottles of cava to celebrate the smallest thing / cracking the ice of small puddles with the toe of a shoe / silent train rides for hours / natural light or just the dark / dressed up for work dressed down for parties / kindness to a point

tagging: @gaycousinlarry @gloriaandrews @hereforlou @thewindmakesnicewaves @tobeakingbesideyousomehow @statementsue @jlf23tumble @infinitelymint @girlhoodandothercults

#tag game

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didanawisgi · 5 years

Link

Abraham Loeb

`Oumuamua is nothing like we expected or seen before.

By Abraham Loeb on November 18, 2018

On October 19, 2017, the first interstellar object, `Oumuamua, was discovered1 by the Pan-STARRS survey2 within a sixth of the Earth-Sun distance. The experience was similar to having a surprise guest for dinner from another country. By examining this guest we can learn about the culture of that country without the need to travel there. Given the vast distance involved, it would have taken us a hundred thousand years to visit the nearest star using conventional chemical rockets. Surprisingly, our first interstellar guest appeared to be weird and unlike anything we have seen before. By the time we realized it, the guest was already out the door with its image fading into the dark street, so we did not have a chance to get a second look at its mysterious qualities. Below is a list of six peculiarities exhibited by `Oumuamua:

1. Assuming that other planetary systems resemble the Solar System, PanSTARRS should not have discovered any interstellar rock in the first place. In a paper published a decade ago3, we predicted an abundance of interstellar asteroids that is smaller by many (2-8) orders of magnitude than needed to explain the discovery of `Oumuamua as a member of a random population of objects. In other words, the population of interstellar objects is far greater than expected. Each star in the Milky-Way needs to eject4 about 1015 such objects during its lifetime to account for the inferred population, much more than anticipated based on the Solar System. Thus, the nurseries of `Oumuamua-like objects must be different from the familiar ones.

2.`Oumuamua originated from a very special frame of reference5, near the socalled Local Standard of Rest (LSR), which is defined by averaging the random motions of all the stars in the vicinity of the Sun. Only one star in five hundred is as slow as `Oumuamua in that frame. The LSR is the ideal frame for camouflage, namely for hiding the origins of an object and avoiding its association with any particular star - since stars typically move in that frame. The relative motion between `Oumuamua and the Sun reflects the motion of the Sun relative to the LSR. `Oumuamua is like a buoy sitting at rest on the surface of the ocean, with the Solar System running into it like a fast ship. Could there be an array of buoys that serves as a network of relay stations or road posts, defining the average Galactic frame of reference in interstellar space?

3. Most interstellar asteroids are expected to be ripped apart from their parent star in the outskirts of their birth planetary system (such as the Oort cloud in the Solar System which extends to a hundred thousand times the Earth-Sun separation), where they are most loosely bound to the star’s gravity. At these outskirts, they can be removed with a small velocity nudge of less than a kilometer per second, in which case they will inherit the speed of their host star relative to the LSR. If `Oumuamua came from a typical star, it must have been ejected with an unusually large velocity kick. To make things more unusual, its kick should have been equal and opposite to the velocity of its parent star relative to the LSR, which is about twenty kilometers per second for a typical star like the Sun. The dynamical origin of `Oumuamua is extremely rare no matter how you look at it. This is surprising, since the first foreign guest to a dinner party should be statistically common (especially given the larger than usual population inferred in the first point above).

4. We do not have a photo of `Oumuamua but its brightness owing to reflected sunlight varied by a factor of 10 as it rotated periodically every eight hours. This implies6 that `Oumuamua has an extreme shape with its length at least 5- 10 times larger than its projected width. Moreover, an analysis7 of its tumbling motion concluded that it would be at its highest excitation state as expected from its tumultuous journey, if it has a pancake-like geometry. The inferred shape is more extreme than for all asteroid previously seen in the Solar System, which have an axes ratio of at most 3.

5. The Spitzer Space Telescope did not detect8 any heat in the form of infrared radiation from `Oumuamua. Given the surface temperature dictated by `Oumuamua’s trajectory near the Sun, this sets an upper limit of hundreds of meters on its size. Based on this size limit, `Oumuamua must be unusually shiny with a reflectance that is at least ten times higher than exhibited by Solar System asteroids.

6. The trajectory of `Oumuamua deviated9 from that expected based on the Sun’s gravity alone. The deviation is small (a tenth of a percent) but highly statistically significant. Comets exhibit such a behavior when ices on their surface heat up from solar illumination and evaporate, generating thrust through the rocket effect. The extra push for `Oumuamua could have originated by cometary outgassing if at least a tenth of its mass evaporated. This massive evaporation would have naturally led to the appearance of a cometary tail, but none was seen. The Spitzer telescope observations place tight limits on any carbon-based molecules or dust around `Oumuamua, and rule out the possibility that normal cometary outgassing is at play (unless it is composed of pure water). Moreover, cometary outgassing would have changed the rotation period of `Oumuamua10 and no such change was observed. Altogether, `Oumuamua does not appear to be a typical comet nor a typical asteroid, even though it represents a population that is far more abundant than expected.

The extra push exhibited by `Oumuamua’s orbit could not have originated from a breakup into pieces because such an event would have provided an impulsive kick unlike the continuous push that was observed. If cometary outgassing is ruled out and the inferred excess force is real, only one possibility remains - an extra push due to radiation pressure from the Sun11. In order for this push to be effective, `Oumuamua needs to be less than a millimeter thick but with a size of at least twenty meters (for a perfect reflector), resembling a lightsail of artificial origin. In this case `Oumuamua would resemble the solar sail demonstrated by the Japanese mission IKAROS12 or the lightsail contemplated for the Starshot initiative13. An artificial origin offers the startling possibility that we discovered “a message in a bottle”, following years of failed searches for radio signals from alien civilizations. Reassuringly, such a lightsail would survive collisions with interstellar atoms and dust as it travels throughout the Galaxy. In contemplating the possibility of an artificial origin, we should keep in mind what Sherlock Holmes said: “when you have excluded the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth”. The Kepler satellite revealed14 that about a quarter of all the stars in the Milky Way have a habitable planet of the size of the Earth, with the potential to have liquid water on its surface and the chemistry of life as we know it. It is therefore conceivable that interstellar space is full of artificially-made debris, either in the form of devices that serve a purpose on a reconnaissance mission or defunct equipment. However, to validate the exotic artificial origin for `Oumuamua we need more data. As Carl Sagan said “extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence”. Interestingly, the possibility of a targeted mission adds some explanatory power. It is unlikely that 1015 solar sails are launched per star to make up a random population of `Oumuamua-like objects. This would require the unreasonable rate of a launch every five minutes from a planetary system even if all civilizations live as long as the full lifetime of the Milky Way galaxy. Instead, the required numbers could be reduced dramatically if `Oumuamua-like objects do not sample all possible orbits randomly but rather follow special orbits that dive into the innermost, habitable regions of planetary systems like the Solar System. `Oumuamua moves too fast for our chemical rockets to catch up with it now without gravitational assist from planets15. But since it would take `Oumuamua thousands of years to leave the solar system, getting a closer look of it through a flyby remains a possibility even if we were to develop new technologies for faster space travel within a decade or two. Interestingly, some interstellar objects which pass close to Jupiter can lose energy and get captured by the Solar System16. These are dinner guests who bumped into a wall on their way out and stayed around after dinner. The Sun-Jupiter system acts as a fishing net. If we can identify trapped interstellar objects through their unusual bound orbits with unusually high inclinations relative to the Solar System plane, we could design missions to visit them and learn more about their nature. Alternatively, we can wait for the next interstellar guest to show up. Within a few years, the Large Synoptic Survey Telescope (LSST)17 will become operational and be far more sensitive to the detection of `Oumuamua-like objects. It should therefore discover many `Oumuamua-like objects within its first year of operation. If it does not find any, we will know that `Oumuamua was special and that we must chase this guest down the street in order to figure out its origin. Studying interstellar objects resembles my favorite activity when walking along the beach with my daughters. We enjoy picking up sea shells that were swept ashore and learning about their different origins. Every now and then, we find a plastic bottle that indicates an artificial origin. Similarly, astronomers should examine any object that enters the Solar System and study its properties. There is no doubt that the six peculiar features of `Oumuamua usher in a new era of space archaeology. References 1. Meech, K. J. et al. Nature, 552, 378 (2017) 2. https://www.ifa.hawaii.edu/research/Pan-STARRS.shtml 3. Moro-Martin, A., Turner, E.L. & Loeb, A., ApJ, 704, 733 (2009) 4. Do, A., Tucker, M.A. & Tonry, J., ApJL, 855, L10 (2018) 5. Mamajek, E. AAS Research Notes, Nov 23 (2017) 6. Fraser, W.C. et al. Nature Astronomy, 2, 383 (2018) 7. Belton, M.J.S. et al. ApJL, 856, L21 (2018) 8. Trilling, D.E. et al. AJ, 156, 261 (2018) 9. Micheli, M. et al. Nature, 559, 223 (2018) 10. Rafikov, R. arXiv:1809.06389 (2018) 11. Bialy, S. & Loeb, A., ApJL, 868, L1 (2018) 12. http://global.jaxa.jp/projects/sat/ikaros/ 13. http://breakthroughinitiatives.org/concept/3 14. Dressing, C.D. & Charbonneau, D., ApJ, 807, 45 (2015) 15. Hein, A.M. et al. arXiv:1711.03155 (2017) 16. Lingam, M. & Loeb, A. AJ, 156, 193 (2018) 17. https://www.lsst.org/

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Abraham Loeb Abraham (Avi) Loeb is chair of the astronomy department at Harvard University, founding director of Harvard's Black Hole Initiative and director of the Institute for Theory and Computation at the HarvardSmithsonian Center for Astrophysics. He chairs the Board on Physics and Astronomy of the National Academies and the advisory board for the Breakthrough Starshot project.

#Oumuamua #Avi Loeb #Astronomy #controversy #debate #extraterrestrial hypothesis

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the-telescope-times · 6 years

Text

6 Strange Facts about the Interstellar Visitor 'Oumuamua

Artist's impression of 'Oumuamua. Credit: Goddard Space Flight Center Flickr (CC BY 2.0)

On October 19, 2017, the first interstellar object, ‘Oumuamua, was discovered by the Pan-STARRS survey. The experience was similar to having a surprise guest for dinner show up from another country. By examining this guest, we can learn about the culture of that country without the need to travel there—a good thing in this case, given that it would take us a hundred thousand years to visit even the nearest star using conventional chemical rockets.

Surprisingly, our first interstellar guest appeared to be weird and unlike anything we have seen before. By the time we realized it, the guest was already out the door with its image fading into the dark street, so we did not have a chance to get a second look at its mysterious qualities. Below is a list of six peculiarities exhibited by ‘Oumuamua:

Assuming that other planetary systems resemble the solar system, Pan-STARRS should not have discovered this or any other interstellar rock in the first place. In a paper published a decade ago, we predicted an abundance of interstellar asteroids that is smaller by many (two to eight) orders of magnitude than needed to explain the discovery of ‘Oumuamua, assuming it’s a member of a random population of objects. Put another way, ‘Oumuamua implies that the population of interstellar objects is far greater than expected. Each star in the Milky Way needs to eject 1015 such objects during its lifetime to account for a population as large as ‘Oumuamua implies. Thus, the nurseries of ‘Oumuamua-like objects must be different from what we know based on our own solar system.

‘Oumuamua originated from a very special frame of reference, the so-called local standard of rest (LSR), which is defined by averaging the random motions of all the stars in the vicinity of the sun. Only one star in 500 is moving as slowly as ‘Oumuamua in that frame. The LSR is the ideal frame for camouflage, namely for hiding the origins of an object and avoiding its association with any particular star. The relative motion between ‘Oumuamua and the sun reflects the motion of the sun relative to the LSR. ‘Oumuamua is like a buoy sitting at rest on the surface of the ocean, with the solar system running into it like a fast ship. Could there be an array of buoys that serves as a network of relay stations or road posts, defining the average galactic frame of reference in interstellar space?

Most interstellar asteroids are expected to be ripped away from their parent star when they lie in the outskirts of their birth planetary system (such as our solar system’s Oort cloud, which extends to 100,000 times the Earth-sun separation), where they are most loosely bound to the star’s gravity. At these outskirts, they can be removed with a small velocity nudge of less than a kilometer per second, in which case they will maintain the speed of their host star relative to the LSR. If ‘Oumuamua came from a typical star, it must have been ejected with an unusually large velocity kick. To make things more unusual, its kick should have been equal and opposite to the velocity of its parent star relative to the LSR, which is about 20 kilometers per second for a typical star like the sun. The dynamical origin of ‘Oumuamua is extremely rare no matter how you look at it. This is surprising, since the first foreign guest to a dinner party should be statistically common (especially given the larger than usual population inferred in the first point above).

We do not have a photo of ‘Oumuamua, but its brightness owing to reflected sunlight varied by a factor of 10 as it rotated periodically every eight hours. This implies that ‘Oumuamua has an extreme elongated shape with its length at least five to 10 times larger than its projected width. Moreover, an analysis of its tumbling motion concluded that it would be at the highest excitation state expected from its tumultuous journey, if it has a pancake-like geometry. The inferred shape is more extreme than for all asteroids previously seen in the solar system, which have an length-to-width ratio of at most three.

The Spitzer Space Telescope did not detect any heat in the form of infrared radiation from ‘Oumuamua. Given the surface temperature dictated by ‘Oumuamua’s trajectory near the sun, this sets an upper limit on its size of hundreds of meters. Based on this size limit, ‘Oumuamua must be unusually shiny, with a reflectance that is at least 10 times higher than exhibited by solar system asteroids.

The trajectory of ‘Oumuamua deviated from that expected based on the sun’s gravity alone. The deviation is small (a tenth of a percent) but highly statistically significant. Comets exhibit such a behavior when ices on their surface heat up from solar illumination and evaporate, generating thrust through the rocket effect. The extra push for ‘Oumuamua could have originated by cometary outgassing if at least a tenth of its mass evaporated. But such massive evaporation would have naturally led to the appearance of a cometary tail, and none was seen. The Spitzer telescope observations also place tight limits on any carbon-based molecules or dust around ‘Oumuamua and rule out the possibility that normal cometary outgassing is at play (unless it is composed of pure water). Moreover, cometary outgassing would have changed the rotation period of ‘Oumuamua, and no such change was observed. Altogether, ‘Oumuamua does not appear to be a typical comet nor a typical asteroid, even as it represents a population that is far more abundant than expected.

The extra push exhibited by ‘Oumuamua’s orbit could not have originated from a breakup into pieces because such an event would have provided a single, impulsive kick, unlike the continuous push that was observed. If cometary outgassing is ruled out and the inferred excess force is real, only one possibility remains: an extra push due to radiation pressure from the sun. In order for this push to be effective, ‘Oumuamua needs to be less than a millimeter thick but with a size of at least 20 meters (for a perfect reflector), resembling a lightsail of artificial origin.

In this case ‘Oumuamua would resemble the solar sail demonstrated by the Japanese mission IKAROS or the lightsail contemplated for the Starshot initiative. An artificial origin offers the startling possibility that we discovered “a message in a bottle” following years of failed searches for radio signals from alien civilizations. Reassuringly, such a lightsail would survive collisions with interstellar atoms and dust as it travels throughout the galaxy.

In contemplating the possibility of an artificial origin, we should keep in mind what Sherlock Holmes said: “when you have excluded the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.” The Kepler satellite revealed that about a quarter of all the stars in the Milky Way have a habitable planet of the size of the Earth, with the potential to have liquid water on its surface and the chemistry of life as we know it. It is therefore conceivable that interstellar space is full of artificially made debris, either in the form of devices that serve a purpose on a reconnaissance mission or in the form of defunct equipment. However, to validate an exotic artificial origin for ‘Oumuamua, we need more data. As Carl Sagan said, “extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence.”