#sexypersonhq

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I love jesters

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Someone added Bitchergiggle to the sexypedia so I guess he's here now

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Bestowing my asexualness onto Jevil and Spamton because I can (more HQ time yay)

They've been dating for a while and decided they want to share a room so staff builder people whoever tf works there do some remodeling and combine both their rooms and they go to see the result and the Wardens there and he's like "Heehee I had them make it soundproof so you can have some fun ;)" and Jevils like "Oh we will have some fun! Fun! Fun! ;)" and then they stay up all night singing karaoke

Goals

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The Addisons not seeing Spamton for years and then he's on TV in some competition called the Tumblr Sexyman Poll and he goes up against a fucking God and wins

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Get Spamton'd idiot

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first time drawing Jevil and Sans yee

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I have decided that Tumblr Sexyperson HQ is a physical building. Here's some crap I made up about it

Because Sans and Cecil both won tournaments they are now presidents of the HQ, below them is the Sexyman Council (Onceler, Warden, Tony, Bill, Black Hat, Alastor

Members get free therapy because most of them need it, also sometimes they Google themselves and are traumatised

Because of how many members are scientists there's a lab area where they can do experiments and talk nerd shit, some members that use this floor are: Dr Eggman, Jimbotnik, Dr Doofenshmirtz and Flurg

There's also clown and skeleton hang out areas because of how many there are, the skeleton area was designed by Jack Skellington so is very Halloween themed, the clown area is very colourful, has lots of balloons and a ball pit which may or may not have something hiding in there

Some who use the skeleton area are: Sans, Papyrus, Jack Skellington, Lewis Pepper, The Phantom, Itward and the Grim Reaper

Some who use the clown area are: Pennywise, Jevil, Dimentio, Fizzarolli, Ronald McDonald, Buggy and Moon (Sun doesn't like going in cus he's scared of everyone so the room is mostly kept in the dark)

There is a bar and restaurant floor which is also used for parties, any member can get on stage and perform by singing, dancing or doing a comedy routine (Bittergiggle has been banned because every time he tells a joke and no one laughs he has a mental breakdown)

For the ones who either don't have a home or do but it's shit, membership also offers living quarters which are basically small apartments (the more popular they are they bigger and nicer their rooms are) some people who live in the building are: Onceler, Bendy, Spamton, Jevil, Warren (tho he probably lives in a closet)

Sans and Cecil don't decide who's a member and who get's kicked out, it's up to the fans. Sans and Cecil get to decide things to do with the building and events

Alastor refuses to appear at any fan meet n greets because he hates his fans

Baldi and Purple Guy are best friends cus they both really fuckin hate kids

Ban Ban is a member for some reason but he doesn't visit a lot due to the fact no one likes him

Bendy follows Alastor around like a lost puppy because he thinks he's cool (Charlie thinks he's adorable)

Dancing Banana hosts quiz shows where sexymen compete, it's very popular, he also hosts interviews

Sun and Papyrus get along very well and hang out a lot, Sans always stays close by incase the lights go out because Moon is a bitch

Dimentio takes full advantage on how strong Jevil is and has mind controlled him several times, Jevil does not remember any of it other than suddenly appearing in a different location feeling dazed

Duck thinks he's the best sexyman, Sans just goes along with it, he doesn't care enough to argue

Red Guy is like a royal British guard as in people like to do weird shit in front of him to get him to react…no one has gotten one yet

Itward is the Dad friend to everyone, he's good at comforting and lends an ear for venting

The Phantom speaks perfect English but he often pretends he only knows French so he can avoid people

King Dice will sometimes co-host Dancing Bananas shows unless he's busy

Zim, Peepers and Marvin will fight constantly and once they enter a room people will start to leave

Mettaton hates how both Sans and Spamton are so much more popular than him since one is lazy and the other lives in the trash (and has tiny legs)

Onceler and Warden are best friends and share one brain cell (their friendship is similar to Arin and Dans from Game Grumps)

Papi will often bring Popee with him which no one is happy with because he is very explosive (literally) except Moon he encourages the chaos and has pretty much adopted him

Everyone has collectively made a rule that no one may upset Papyrus, anyone who does is shunned and excluded

There is an ongoing war between Ronald McDonald and Colonel Sanders where they both try to put up the most ads for their food places

Sans has a fancy penthouse apartment he only uses for naps, there's toys in it for when Frisk is over as well

Even after everything that happened, Jevil is still good with kids and won't hurt them, one time he found Frisk sitting alone as Sans was in a meeting so he played with them and showed them magic tricks until it was done

Every so often Shrignold will show up and ship everyone with everyone, no one likes him and Tony will have to search the whole building to catch him and kick him out

Larry sees everyone's dreams, he has seen some shit and isn't sure whether Spamton or Jevil have the weirder ones

Slenderman is like a sim, he will walk over to people and join their conversations although he doesn't speak, he just stands there menacingly

The Smiler is there sometimes, no one knows why but they've just accepted it, the people at Alton Towers are still trying to figure out why is keeps disappearing tho

The Onceler has been woken up on several occasions in the early hours of the morning because Spamton and Jevil decided to have a competition on who can make the most noise and keep the other awake (their rooms are right next to each other)

Jevil and Popee are an awful combination, they have lit many fires, Fizzarolli is afraid

The Warden in in charge of security, he has placed cameras everywhere

As part of the agreement when they were taking Jevil he is not allowed to leave the building on his own and has to wear an ankle monitor which will also shock him if he tries to leave

When Tony first arrived he made sure every room has a clock so everyone always knows the time

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Jevil and Spamton playing video games together would be the funniest shit

Like Jevil would troll CONSTANTLY. He takes nothing seriously and just messes around like he doesnt even care if he wins or not he just lives for the chaos and Spamton would get so mad. Controllers have been thrown at the TV, the wall and also at Jevil when he steals the fucking Mario Party star AGAIN

But then Sans joins and it gets worse and now they're trying to out troll each other, Spamton is crying, God is dead

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Random Spamton and Jevil headcanons in HQ

Spamton has the biggest room out of everyone living there because he's so popular, it's the size of a small apartment but because he's a midget it's practically a mansion

Unfortunately his room ended up being right next to Jevils which neither of them knew about until it was all finished and too late

Spamtons room is mostly black and white with pipis Scattered everywhere, people keep gifting him it and he's running out of places to keep them (but he isnt complaining)

Jevils room is mostly purple but has things in lots of colours everywhere, party hats balloons, confetti etc

Jevil has trouble sleeping because his brain goes a million miles a minute so makes noise with his kazoo or giant rubber chicken to wake up Spamton because he thinks it's funny

As part of the agreement when Jevil was being transferred from prison to the HQ there's strict rules he has to follow like:

No sharp objects

Nothing that emits a flame (because of these he can't cook in his own room and has to have other people make his food)

No leaving the building without armed supervision (if he tries his ankle monitor with shock him)

No getting too close to fans

His ankle monitor also has a tracker so if he's out of view of the cameras, security still knows where he is

Spamton doesn't have many friends because no one knows what tf he's saying but if Sans and/or Papyrus are around he'll just hang out with them, they also don't know what he's saying but they appreciate his company

Jevil mostly hangs out in the clown room with all the evil clowns and jesters. None of them have any idea how strong he is, they just see this tiny jester and think "aww its cute"

Spamton still has some lingering feelings but is in deep denial and the only way he can think of getting his attention is to yell weird insults from across the room

Jevil also has lingering feelings though he's actually accepted his and will occasionally flirt

Neither of them are aware of the others feelings. Spamton thinks the flirting is just Jevils way of making fun of him and Spamton has convinced himself he hates Jevil so much that he's also convinced Jevil. They're both morons

Whenever Jevil sees someone picking on Spamton he will pull a sneaky mean prank on them, not too mean so he doesn't get in trouble but mean enough to be an inconvenience. Spamton doesn't know about this

Spamton sometimes gets love letters from a secret admirer, Papyrus has vowed to help him figure out who it is (tho they're nowhere close), Sans figured it out instantly but isn't that much of an asshole that he would say (gee I wonder who it could be)

Spamton completely adores his fans. (Canon!) He comments on all posts mentioning him, (tho he should probably stop responding to trolls) loves doing meet & greets etc. The fact that he has so many who all love him makes him feel like he's still a big shot, maybe even bigger than he was

Spamton and Jevil have plushies of each other. Spamton will tell people it was a gift from a fan and that he hasn't gotten rid of it yet because he doesn't want to be rude

Jevil has mentioned Spamton so much to his jester friends. Dimentio is sick of hearing about him so will change the subject. Fizzarolli will actually listen and offer advice

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A list of places Bill and Alastor have put Spamton because they were bored:

Microwave

Washing machine

Dryer

Oven

Freezer

Kite

End of a fishing poll

Firework

Hood of a car

Tied to a ceiling fan

Hamster ball

Dishwasher

Cotten Candy machine

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Do you think Spamton would have a twitch? Like because of the donations and subscriptions n stuff like he wouldn't play any games he would just rant about stuff but people would find it so entertaining because of the way he talks

Jevil would show up in the chat a lot to troll and Spamton would get so mad but he doesn't know how to block people and no one wants to tell him because they find it funny

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Bill and Alastor are banned from sitting next to each other in meetings cus they keep making each other laugh and Tony's sick of it

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Christmas at HQ Shrignold sneaks in the night before and hangs mistletoes EVERYWHERE while laughing maniacaly

But then they end up doing mistlefoe instead where you fight the other person underneath it

Christmas is CHAOS

EVERYONE IS DEAD

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Alastor and Bill being friends but would absolutely stab each other in the back if the opportunity presents itself

"Let's be friends :)"

"Best friends :)"

*Already planning the others downfall*

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Alastor and Bill being friends but would absolutely stab each other in the back if the opportunity presents itself

"Let's be friends :)"

"Best friends :)"

*Already planning the others downfall*