#shelledposting

[coremechs]

dw we meant to post goncharov its blaseballcore and we’re the blaseball core

[zweihawke]

where am i

it's cold and smells like oil

[lenasai]

ID: A three-panel Blaseball comic about Ivy's "Shellswhere" adventure in Season 17. Text in the first panel reads "What if you (written in pink over an arrow pointing to Ivy giving a thumbs up) wanted to play Blaseball (written in red over a baseball, a baseball diamond, and a bat.)" The second panel reads "...but the sim said no..." and shows Ivy getting stuck in a peanut shell after gaining the Shelled modifier from Felix Garbage. The third panel reads "...and also fuck you" and shows the peanut getting launched into the air by a salmon.

happy anniversary to that time ivy got yeeted out of a salmon cannon and then became the first player to roll back from elsewhere, all after getting themself stuck in a peanut

(they got themself stuck in the peanut on 4/20. iconic.)

[coremechs]

my favourite part of blaseball was when kelp kelp said it’s kelpin’ time and then kelped all over the place

[coremechs]

the field zones are linear algebra and i'll be modifying these matricies to form a linear outcome by translating them across time with calculus by launching a 78.4mm ball with a large primarily fiber laiden lathed tree stump to send it airborne into the stands of an adoring audience *

*the preceding statement can be replaced with the phrase "i hit the ball to win"

[coremechs]

doin agriculture underground call that corn mechanics

[coremechs]

Core Mechs ranked by how cringe their falls were

Chorby Short: 0/10. chorby short, chorby spring, chorby can fall from anything

Scoobert Toast: 2/10. a giant satellite crashed somewhere in the core is no laughing matter and if you - wait is my genuine emotion cringe?

Sheri Friday: 3/10. creating a functioning parachute out of sugar and pastry is deeply impressive, but also being good at things? kinda cringe.

Jaxon Buckley: 4/10. hit their head and got a concussion, which is cringe but also concerning, would have been a bit higher but jaxon is too genuine to be cringe

Chibodee Alighieri: 7/10. landed in core WV and walked down. cringe due to lack of effort shown. next time fall from a great height like a real mech.

Tevin Melcon: 8/10. just sort of landed, but due to inbuilt cringe of angsty teen, automatically bumped up by several points.

Djuna Scoresburg: 19/10. landed with great aplomb and plenty of grace, but no one was around to see it which is inherently deeply cringe

[coremechs]

core mechs by if you did wanton and undeserved acts of violence to them part two

djuna scoresburg: moth, would be squished

chorby short: frog, would be squished

why are the mechs animal themed now send help

[coremechs]

still sad abt sheri friday btw

[coremechs]

Core Mechs by if I went to fight them in my infinite rage the threequel

Scoobert Toast: would probably break my hand. very embarrassing for everyone involved, but mostly me. Might make them stronger, due to the first law of robotics (kick it to make it faster).

Jaxon Buckley: … yea i think im good no problems here haha uhhh I think the person who keeps beating up core mechanics players went that way 😅

[coremechs]

where are we

[coremechs]

core-by short :)

[coremechs]

we’re the im-core-tant blue checkmechanics now

[coremechs]

the mech urge to equip the dugout with industrial grade concrete mixers so people can make their own tables and furniture so that they can make tools to smash the concrete furniture they just made for fun

[coremechs]

once they unleash me on blaseball.com it’s all over for all of you people

[coremechs]

tumblr.

unknown.

everything. don’t worry we’re fixing it though!