#since in this universe quinn wants to move the fuck away from the whole pregnancy stuff

[forabeatofadrum]

Question for fic readers and I guess also writers:

In the upcoming chapter of Ljubili se (yes, I am writing something), I am introducing a "plot point" that might potentially never be brought up again. Should I include it in the first place, or is it fine to just never bring it up again? Or at least, it won't be resolved. And that's because it has absolutely nothing to do with the actual story of Ljubili se.

Then why is it there in the first place? Well, because other characters still have a life of their own, and even though Kurt and Blaine don't know it, that doesn't mean it isn't there. Does that make sense? So it's more to show that people in this universe are people with their own lives and stories and thoughts and what not, completely separately from their connection to Kurt and Blaine. But then again, if I do bring it up, even if it's mostly up to interpretation, do people want a pay-off?

[peytonhudson]

The One Where Puck Breaks Her Heart || Peychuck

tagging: @thepuckrmn & @peytonhudson

location: peyton’s house

time frame: december 10, 3am

notes: the one after puck finds out about sarah’s pregnancy. 

warnings: i mean, there’s crying?

puck

Puck stood outside of the door, staring at it for who knows how long. After Sarah told him the news, he ended up wandering the dark streets of Doveport for a while before finding himself in front of the familiar house. It was 3 in the morning and he wasn’t even sure what he was doing there. His head was already messed up from the trip to Wisconsin and now Sarah’s news threatened to send him over the edge. Twins. Two new Puckermans were coming into the world. Two new reminders that he had a daughter somewhere in Wisconsin that he already missed out on 10 years of her life. Puck reached out and knocked on the door, figuring Peyton was probably asleep and unlikely to answer. To his surprise, he heard footsteps on the other side and a few moments later, the door swung open to reveal the person he needed to see the most. He immediately was at a loss for words. “I…uh…” he muttered as he stepped through the door and made a beeline to her couch. Sitting down, he stared at the wall in front of him. The same wall he stared at when she told him she knew about his daughter. This time was different. The wall wasn’t enough. Sensing her sit next to him, he leaned over and laid his head in her lap. He couldn’t find the right words to say so he just squeezed her legs tightly and shut his eyes.

peyton

“Puck?” Peyton hadn’t meant to sound so confused when she opened the door and saw the man on the other side. It wasn’t as though this was the first time he had showed up late at night — they had spent most nights together at this stage — but tonight the look on his face told her it wasn’t with the intention to take off their clothes. She stands to the side to let him come in, watching concerned as he made his way to the couch without saying a word. This had only really happened once when Peyton had made the mistake of telling him she knew about his daughter with Quinn, but at least that night she knew he was coming over, and back then he didn’t look so... lost. It was easy for her to ramble about cats for a few hours, but when he sat on the couch and her heart sank to her stomach, it didn’t feel like listing off pet trivia was entirely appropriate right now. She sits next to him and rests a hand on his shoulder gently, not saying anything. As much as she wanted to, as much as she always wants to say something, it wasn’t the time. She was taken back for only a second when his head fell to her lap, and as he squeezes her legs, Peyton’s heart broke just a little bit. “It’s okay.” She says quietly, running her hand softly through his hair. She lets him lay there for a while, she’s not even sure how long, playing idly with his black hair and trailing her hand down his side before finally speaking. “What’s wrong, babe? ... Do you need anything? Food, water, beer, hedgehog facts?”

puck

He refused to let go of her legs, as if he was afraid that she was run away. Her fingers in his hair was soothing and over time he could feel himself slowly relax. His eyes opened when he heard her voice. “I just need you,” he muttered to himself mostly. He sighed deeply and stared at the wall in front of him. 10 years of bottled up emotions were threatening to explode if he didn’t release some of the pressure. “Her name is Lily,” he said softly. “My daughter...her name is Lily.” Puck reached up and took her hand in his and squeezed it softly. “They wouldn’t let us meet her. They wouldn’t even show us a picture. Pretty much told us to fuck off. My daughter is 10 and I have no idea what she looks like.” Puck paused and focused on her hand in his to keep himself from crying. “Sarah is pregnant. And now I have to do the responsible fucking big brother thing and be there for her when it’s just going to kill me inside.” He knew he wasn’t doing a good job at explaining what was bothering him, but it was more than he was used to sharing. “My daughter is 10 and I don’t even know what she looks like,” he repeated.

peyton

Peyton listened, squeezing his hand tightly, almost willing the universe to transfer some of his pain to her. She leaned down and kissed the top of his head, lingering her lips against him for a few moments. “I’m so sorry, Puck.” It didn’t feel like enough, but nothing she could say would feel like enough here.  “Lily is a beautiful name.” She whispers, looking down at the man in her lap, a man who was far braver than anyone ever gave him credit for. “A beautiful name, for a beautiful girl... Because she is beautiful, you don’t need to see a photo to know that. You don’t need to see her to know that lily is the strongest ten year old the world has ever seen. She’s intelligent and kind like her parents, but I genuinely pity any child who tries to go up against her, because no one stands a chance. And like her dad, when she smiles everyone notices, the room stops... every time, and there’s not a thing she could ask for and not get in a second. But when she’s mad, she’s Quinn. For sure. One look and everyone knows they’re done for. That ten year old could destroy someone with her words alone.” Peyton knew she was rambling, but it’s what she did. What they did. Puck looked at walls, she rambled. But biting down on her lip, she stopped herself, and let her thumb brush over the skin on the back of his hand. “You’re not alone, Puck.”

puck

His eyes closed once more as Peyton started describing who his daughter could be. It was all too much for him. It felt like he lost a part of himself that day in the hospital 10 years ago and he stupidly thought that maybe being able to see her would help him heal. As hard as he fought the emotions bubbling to the surface, he came up short as a couple of tears finally fell from his eyes onto Peyton’s lap. Puck took a shaky breath and placed a soft kiss on her hand. “How am I supposed to help Sarah? I just…I love Lexi. I really do. But every time I see you or Ben interact with her…it feels like I’m being stabbed a little on the inside. Every time I look at her I ask if that’s what my daughter would’ve been like at 5. I know it’s selfish. I know I’m a dick for even saying anything like this. It’s just not fucking fair. Now I have to do this whole thing with Sarah because she doesn’t even know who the dad is and I can’t let her deal with twins alone.” Puck groaned and let go of Peyton’s hand so he could cover his face. His heart hurt and all he really wanted to do was rewind time and pretend none of this was actually happening. “Twins. Two of them. Two more fucking Puckermans in this world. Baby…I don’t know what I’m going to do. I feel like I’m fucking losing it.”

peyton

Peyton’s eyes shut for a minute and her whole body is breaking for him. She swallows thickly as he talks about his feelings towards Lexi, and even as the little girls mom... she gets it. “No, babe, no... that doesn’t make you a dick. That makes you human, and it’s so not selfish. Because you’re right, it’s not fair... none of it’s fair.”  When he let’s go of her hand, runs her fingers again though his hair. “Hey... Look at me?” She says gently, turning him on her lap — partly to see him, mostly so she could hold him closer. “Sarah is going to be okay. She’s a puckerman, it’s in her blood. And she has you... You would move the world for her. I can’t promise it won’t hurt, but when those twins come, you’ll move the world for them too. And babe... I’m not going to let you lose it.”

puck

Puck reluctantly allowed her to turn him on her lap. His bloodshot eyes looking up at her brown ones. This was the first time he allowed anyone who wasn’t related to him see him in such a vulnerable state since Quinn in high school. Puck took a deep breath and tried to calm himself down. Put himself back in the walls he was used to hiding behind. It was nearly impossible to do as he listened to Peyton talk, seeing the sincerity and caring in her eyes. A sad smile played on his lips. “What did I do to deserve someone like you?” he said quietly. Leaning up and cupping her face, Puck pressed his lips against hers. Softly at first, and then building as he allowed everything he felt about the girl pour into the kiss. Everything he wasn’t ready to say out loud yet. Pulling away, he stared into her eyes and brushed his thumb against her cheek. “Thank you.”

peyton

It’s what she had wanted. She had all but begged him to let her in (honestly she probably even did that), but there wasn’t anything that could prepare her for how much her heart would hurt for him when she saw the pain in his eyes. “It was the puns.” Peyton joked softly, wrapping her arms around him and letting the kiss speak for him. Maybe they never needed to have a label on their relationship if he kissed her like that for the rest of her life? It takes her breath away for a second, and when he pulls away her lips are tingling and instantly missing him . “Of course,” She whispers and leans forward to let her forehead rest on his. “I love you, Puck. I’m not going anywhere.” Peyton knew he wasn’t at the love stage, but that didn’t bother her. She was still going to say it because if anyone deserved to be loved, it was him. “Do you want to keep looking at my wall, or do you want to go to bed?”

puck

He would happily sit there staring into her eyes all night if he could. “Really though. How did I get so lucky? You’re so fucking caring. And so beautiful. I mean like…so beautiful. Inside and out. You’re patient with me. You actually listen to me when I talk. And did I mention how beautiful you are?” He let out a small sigh and kissed her once more. Pulling away again, he smirked at her question. “I kinda would rather keep looking at you, to be honest,” he muttered, “but I guess I could do that in bed.” Puck placed a kiss on her forehead before swinging his long legs to the floor to stand up. Leaning down, he scooped her up into his arms. “Just practicing for our wedding night,” he joked as he made the familiar walk to her room.

peyton

Peyton shakes her head, “You might be biased, Puck Puckerman. Sex goggles and all that.” She told him with a half shrug. “Besides, you’re so much more than you give yourself credit for.  You’re more than a distraction, a hot body, and an insanely talented tattoo artist.” She adds looking down at the P on her finger briefly. “You have this crazy huge heart, and anyone that knows you -- that really knows you -- is lucky to have you. And that, Sarah and I both agreed on. So it’s two against one. You can’t even argue it.” She smirks slightly and kisses at the tip of his nose. “Have I finally outranked the wall? Because if so this might be the greatest accomplishment of my life.” Peyton joked, her arms shifting to his shoulders when he picks her up. “My fiance is the cutest” She smiles warmly, her eyes not leaving his face as they move to the bedroom. For as much Puck told her she was beautiful, he really was the most beautiful man she’d ever met. After placing her on the bed, she pulls him down with her to kiss him.  “Thank you for letting me in.” She murmurs quietly as she pulls away. “I know it wasn’t easy for you, and I know you didn’t have to.”

puck

“You and Sarah are already teaming up against me? I am fucked. And I am not cute,” he jokingly responded. Puck carefully placed her on the bed before working to kick his shoes off. He easily allowed her to pull him down to her level and happily returned her kiss. Climbing onto the bed next to her, he placed his hand on her waist as he laid down. “Thank you for being patient with me. I know my question dodging and just general lack of emotion has been tough to deal with. I’m not saying this is gonna be a regular thing...because honestly it probably won’t...but I think this was good. I’m happy I came over. And I’m really happy you accidentally texted me that day.” His eyes lock onto hers as he pulled her closer to his body. “I am sorry for keeping you up this late though,” he added as he glanced at her illuminated alarm clock.

peyton

“I promised I’d be patient.” She reminds him of the morning after their first not-date date “I keep my promises, and I have no intention to stop being patient with you, so it’s okay... I’m not expecting you to change who you are, Puck. The question dodging is umm...” She laughs quietly and her fingers started to play with the fabric of his shirt. “But I wouldn’t take any of it back, y’know? Not a second.” Peyton honestly hadn’t noticed the time, she’d already been awake when Puck had come over and once he showed up at her door the time really didn’t matter, she just wanted to be there for him. It possibly helped that Lexi was at her mom’s house for the night so there was going to be no little knocks on the door in two hours wondering what’s happening. “Babe... This isn’t the first time you’ve kept me up this late, and you know I’m always open 24/7 for you. Which sounds dirty, but it’s... actually, yeah, it’s dirty.” Yawning, Peyton curls up into Puck’s side, her eyes heavy as she listens to the sound of his chest beneath her, her long legs tangling into his even longer legs. “But I may have a final in two days so I should probably get some sleep to study for that tomorrow.” She adds tiredly, not able to keep her eyes open any longer. “You’re going to be okay, Puck.” She whispers tiredly, kissing at his chest. “I promise.”

puck

Puck wrapped his arms around her as she curled into his side. He couldn’t help but chuckle at her 24/7 comment. “You can’t make comments like that without expecting me to eventually test out the dirty version of always being open for me,” he joked before pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “Get some sleep so you can ace the final and be a fancy pants vet and be my sugar mama.” He settled further into the bed with her in his arms, softly running his fingers over her back as he listened to her breathing even out. Puck stared at the dark ceiling above him as his busy mind replayed everything that had gone on in the last month of his life. Sleep wasn’t going to come anytime soon. But with Peyton in his arms, he didn’t seem to mind much.