#sir... sir u can have ur snacks back its ok

[tahthetrickster]

went 2 get my daily solved-the-altador-quest prize thing and i think king altador forgot to grab anything for me today and just panicked and handed me his lunch

[adoringhaikyuu]

hello!! i have a bit of a request! could i get oikawa bokuto and kuroo w a s/o who absolutely loves to cook and bake and does so a lot, but always always always shares the food they make? n they kinda slowed down in making food bc ppl arent accepting or wanting the food they make and its making them really down :(

ive been having this issue w my roommates bc i always cook for them w lots of love and they never eat what i make and its,, draining on me,,,,

but yea!! i just want oikawa bokuto n kuroo to make me feel a lil better :( thank u so so so much!!!! i love ur blog n ur writing so much 🖤

THEY AREN'T EATING YOUR FOOD SO YOU STOP COOKING FOR THEM

CHARACTERS: bokuto + kuroo + oikawa + (gn!reader)

WARNINGS: none

NOTES: i hope everything is ok and if not i hope it gets better!! <3 + i tried to make these a little happier ! they all take place over a week + i tried a new format with this we'll see if i stick w it sfkjhg

bokuto:

bokuto honestly didn't not want to eat your food

it's just that he had to go on a new diet for the upcoming season, his trainer and nutritionist told him to try it out to see how it works with him

and the things you cooked and baked were on the no eating list

he just loved when you made food for him, it tasted amazing and he could feel the love you put into it

he was planning on waiting the diet out and stockpiling all the food you made for afterwards as a treat

but he may or may not have failed to tell you that

so when you noticed he wasn't eating the food you left for him when he came home late after practice, you were disheartened and not to be dramatic, but heartbroken as well

deciding not to waste anymore, you simply stopped

turns out, the diet wasn't really working with bokuto, his nutritionist decided it was unecessary since he was getting the same results when he wasn't on it––thanks to his genetics, metabolism and workout routine. if anything he was glad, he was beyond excited to come home and finally eat your cooking again.

he practically ran home with a skip in his step, shouting out cheerfully as soon as he stepped past the front door. "baby i'm home!" he put his things down and took his shoes off, before gliding in front of the fridge to open it. "what's for dinner?––" he trailed off when he noticed there was nothing cooking, maybe you were starting later? he looked through the shelves in the fridge, looking for something to snack on in the mean time and gasped abruptly when he couldn't find the containers of food he'd been saving over the past week.

he closed the doors and frantically looked around the kitchen, opening random cupboards that couldn't possibly keep any refrigerated food fresh.

you walked in to find him searching around like a madman and you paused. "kou? what's wrong?"

he looked up at the sound of your voice and ran over to you, placing his hands on your waist. he kissed your forehead to say hello, despite the pout on his face and the clearly pressing matter on his mind. "hi baby doll. i was looking for all the food that was in the fridge, did you move them?"

you paused, "well i––i threw them out?"

his eyes almost bulged out of his head, "what?! why??"

you were confused by his sudden outburst, it's not like he was eating any of it. "i mean you weren't eating, kou...it's been a week since you've stopped eating my food, i just didn't see the point in keeping it all in there...that's also why i'm not making dinner right now."

he stared at you, shocked and disappointed in himself, he had no idea you were feeling this upset. "oh my god...did i forget to tell you?" your brows furrowed curiously but he simply pulled you into his arms for a tight hug. "i'm so sorry bub––they wanted me to try out this new diet, that's why i wasn't eating! i didn't mean to make you upset! i was even planning on eating all of the dinners i missed afterwards...but the diet wasn't for me so i can go back to eating normally now!"

you pulled back slightly to look at him, not knowing what to say. "oh..."

he gave you a sad smile, "yeah," he brought a hand up to hold your cheek, "you know i love your food––it honestly hurt my heart when they told me i couldn't eat it!"

you cracked a smile and he gave you one right back, "i'm serious!"

you sighed happily, "okay...so i guess i should start making dinner then?––"

he was pulling you over to the fridge before you could finish your sentence, "absolutely! and i'm helping!"

you laughed and started getting the ingredients together, "how about i make your favorite tonight?"

he nodded like a child excited for ice cream and kissed you on the cheek. he wasn't really a chef himself, that's why he left it to you––he didn't want to burn down the kitchen. so he'd mostly be staying by your side, maybe handing you things or mixing things, but you enjoyed his company nonetheless.

you had started seasoning the food when he slid his arms around you from behind, leaning down to rest his head on your shoulder. "hey baby?" you hummed in response and his hold on you tightened a bit. "would you...mind making my favorite dessert tonight too? i've been craving it for a while now..."

you smiled to yourself and nodded, "i'd love to."

he squeezed you and kissed your cheek loudly, "yes! thank you i love you so much!–"

kuroo:

almost every day you sent kuroo off to work with a baked good you made him

he loved them and you loved making them so it was a win-win

you'd put them in a little container with a cute note

and though he knew what to expect each time, they never failed to brighten his day

but earlier this week you stopped by kuroo's office to drop off the treat he'd forgotten to take with him today in his rush out the door

he was in a meeting so his assistant let you into his office

and you felt an ache in your chest when you noticed four of the treats you'd given him this past week all on his desk, unopened

that day, you went back home with all the uneaten sweets and unshed tears aching to fall from your eyes

did he just take them to please you? did he not really want them this whole time? was he just trying to be a good husband?

all these questions flooded your mind, only confusing and hurting you further

but one thing was for certain, you'd stop baking them for him

it didn't make sense for you to if you knew it'd be going to waste

kuroo was beyond done with his day and it wasn't even halfway over. he sighed, loosening his tie as he shut the door to his office, drained from the two hour meeting he'd been in.

thankfully, he had no more meetings today so he could sit and relax while he worked in his office. he sat down at his desk and shut his eyes for a moment, needing to calm down and regenerate himself. he reached over to his left blindly, knowing he'd left the treats you baked him there––things had been getting so hectic lately, he barely had time to eat them, but he was saving them for when he did have the time.

his hand smacked down on the desk three times as he tried to reach for the containers before he finally opened his eyes. his brows furrowed slightly, "what the..." he looked around the desk, opening the drawers and everything before giving up and calling his assistant in.

she knocked on the door and he signaled for her to come in.

"yes sir?"

"hi, do you know where the sweets i had on my desk are? i thought i left them here."

his assistant thought for a moment before perking up, "oh i believe your partner came and collected them while you were in your meeting, sir."

he frowned, "y/n was here? why didn't you tell me?"

"they asked me not to disturb you."

kuroo nodded, "oh alright...well, thank you, that'll be all."

he immediately pulled his personal phone out and called your number, you must have been back home by now.

you saw his name pop up on your screen as you were about to throw out the baked goods and hesitated for a good while before sighing and picking up. "yes?"

you could practically hear the smirk on his face as he spoke through the phone.

kuroo leaned back in his chair, looking up at the ceiling as he spoke. "you stole my sweets from me? where'd you hide them? or did you eat them?"

he didn't even feel bad that he'd just left them there?––"well you clearly weren't eating them kuroo," the smirk dropped from his face and he sat up, alert. woah––kuroo? why did you sound upset? "they were just sitting on your desk––anyway, i was about to throw them out."

"woah, what?? why would you do that?!"

he was speaking to you but you honestly weren't listening, too annoyed and too hurt to pay attention. "look if you didn't like them, you could have just told me so i wouldn't have to waste hours every day busting my ass to make them for you––were you just throwing them out this whole time, is that it?––"

he shook his head with each word you uttered before realizing you couldn't see him, he was just in complete shock. "what? no no, kitten listen to me, hey listen, okay?" you paused, mostly to catch your breath, but he took that opportunity to speak up. "i love when you bake for me, everything you make tastes amazing. i love eating the sweets you make when i'm at work because they remind me of you and of how much you love me––this week's just been a complete pain in my ass and i haven't had the time to sit down, eat and enjoy your treats, i love them and you too much to just scarf them down in a minute. i need to savor them, you know?" despite the adrenaline running in your body, you cracked a smile. "i finally had some time to myself and i was gonna eat them just now when i realized they were missing so i called you..."

he trailed off and you took that as your cue to speak up. "oh..."

you could hear his smirk again, "yeah, oh."

"so i...maybe...overreacted a bit."

he chuckled, the sound warm even through the phone. "no kitten you didn't, i get why you were upset––but, you should have asked me about it first."

you sighed, "yeah, yeah..." you looked at the open containers in front of you, only now noticing the notes you put in them were gone––he must have taken them out to read them even though he didn't have time to eat––"wait a minute, if you haven't had time to eat..." you could hear him clear his throat awkwardly, "kuroo you haven't been eating lunch?!"

he laughed awkwardly, "um, i mean, i eat after work––"

"that's not the same!" you rolled your eyes, "i'm coming back over there and i'm bringing you lunch and you're going to eat it, understand?"

he poked his tongue to the side of his cheek. "okay, kitten."

you sighed, "you're lucky i love you."

he leaned back in his chair again, "oh could you bring one of the––"

you cut him off, putting one of the already closed containers back in your bag. "already on it."

he grinned, "god, i love you."

oikawa:

oikawa loves your cooking

and normally he scrambles home after practice to eat it

but this past week training was grueling and tiring, so by the time he came out every day, he was drained mentally and physically

and he was starving

he couldn't wait any longer as soon as he stepped foot out of the gym

so he went to the nearest takeout place, bodega, whatever to get something to eat quickly,, for the whole week

he thought nothing of it

but when he came home every night for a week straight saying he'd already eaten when you tried to offer him the food you spent hours making?

it hurt, a lot

so you decided you'd stop cooking

oikawa was aching to go home––he was exhausted and all he thought about to get him through the day was you, your cooking and your cuddles. he needed all three immediately. when his coach said they were all free to go home, he could almost feel a weight lifting off his shoulders.

he sighed loudly as he stepped into your home, peeling his sneakers off and setting his things aside. he padded into the house, going straight to the kitchen and frowned when you were nowhere in sight. he'd come home a bit early today, around the time you were usually making dinner.

he looked around and walked to the living room, smiling to himself when he found you sitting on the couch, looking for something to watch on tv.

you smiled up at him and greeted him, the sound of your voice making him feel warm inside. "hi baby, how was your day?"

he huffed and slid onto the couch, lying down so his head was in your lap. "don't even talk to me about the day i've had––i was thinking about you the whole time." he took your hand in his and brought it up to his lips to give it a soft kiss. "you got me through it."

he placed one of your hands on his cheek and the other in his hair, mumbling a thank you when you started playing with the slightly damp mess on his head. "mm that feels good baby." he closed his eyes and sighed contently, settling in comfortably to your touch.

after a few moments, he spoke up softly, trying his best not to fall asleep. "what's for dinner?"

"um i'm not sure," your eyes were focused back on the tv as you thought for a moment. "what do you wanna order?"

he paused and cracked one eye open, opening the other when he realized you weren't joking. "wha––order?"

you looked down at him and nodded hesitantly, "yeah? like takeout?"

he sat up abruptly and turned to face you, "what? why?"

you paused this time, unsure of how to respond. "well...every night for the past week you haven't been eating my food. i think it's fair for me to assume you don't want my food anymore."

he felt a piece of himself break on the inside, "oh angel..." he grabbed your hands, "no no––i love your food, you know that––i've just been so tired this week, i couldn't even wait to get home to eat, so i stopped by the nearest places with the boys." he scooted closer to you. "i'm so sorry i made you feel like i didn't appreciate what you do for me––i promise from now on i'll drag myself on my hands and knees if i have to to come home to you and eat––"

you laughed and shook your head, "tooru there's no need for that––"

he cut you off, almost offended. "of course there is! i hurt your feelings baby, i never want to do that again!"

you smiled and pulled him in for a sweet kiss that he quickly melted into. you pulled away to look at him earnestly. "it's okay babe. just...maybe tell me next time? i was just worried you were tired of my food, that's all."

he pulled you into his lap and held you tight. "i could never and will never be tired of anything you do for me, i promise." he kissed your cheek. "though it is my fault, i did miss your cooking this week––but if you're not in the mood to make anything i understand and we can still order––"

you shook your head, "i'll make your favorite, okay?"

he pulled you in for another kiss, "i really don't deserve you."

[babymilkawa]

HI ITS ME CAN YOU PRETTY PLEASE WRITE SOME HCS FOR SUGAWARA IF HIS GF IS SICK. ALSO I DUNNO HOW MANY OTHER CHARACTERS YOU DO FOR EACH HC POST CAUSS I FORGOT TO CHECK, but if you need like three i’d really love hinata and daichi as well :D REMINDER OF SUGAWARA SUPREMACYYYYYY

HERE ARE SOME THINGS I MADE AS A BRIBE

ILL TAKE IT// but yea I didn’t rly put a limit cos ppl are decent enuf to not request like 10 at a time right?? 😅 here ya go swaglorddd

sick s/o headcanons with:

sugawara koushi, hinata shoyo, sawamura daichi, kenma kozume

gn!reader :)

sugawara koushi

if you show up to his practice wrapped in layers of clothing and a red nose, he’ll excuse himself immediately and force you to sit down on the bench while he goes to coach ukai’s store to get some meds for you

when he comes back, both his hands are carrying two plastic bags

one of them has your stuff, warm food that isn’t greasy and cough drops too

the others are cold drinks for his teammates aww karasuno’s mom

you are forBiddEn to have the drinks too except for the warm water he put in your water bottle

rly wished you’d go home first instead of waiting for his practice to end but it doesn’t seem like you want to

he’ll look to the benches every few minutes to see your sleeping form

during break, he’ll gently move your head onto his lap so you don’t have to lay on the hard bench

as soon as they’re dismissed he’s giving you his jacket cos “it gets cold in the night time” and warms up ur hands

if you try to keep ur distance so he doesn’t get sick too, he’ll joke that you prolly already got the whole team sick

making you pout and him pinching ur cheeks 😖

once you reach your place, he’ll linger outside of your door,,,unwilling to let go of your hands SOB

“I’ll come back tomorrow morning ok? I’ll also bring porridge but you still need to eat something else and don’t forget to drink hot wat-”

“yes, yes I know koushi...now go home so you don’t catch a cold too”

but even when you’re standing by your window, you’ll see him looking around your house, tryna figure out which window belongs to your bedroom

and as promised, he comes back the next day with hot porridge and makes sure that your water bottle is full with warm water

and that your backpack has extra cough drops

he’ll still hold your hand and kiss ur forehead

maybe part of him wants to get sick so u can take care of him djhfjdhf

hinata shoyo

he’ll pout a little once he finds out your sick but he’ll still stay by your side!

he’s still overflowing with energy but doesn’t wanna tire you out too much

you’ll hear him stop by your house in the mornings with a volleyball in his hands and maybe kageyama behind him, eating

he’ll bring random snacks from coach ukai’s store and place them at ur door

you’ll sit by ur window and he’ll sit outside of it, telling you about his day, what he did, how practice was

“y/n no one clapped for me T-T”

cos ur usually clapping for him after every successful hit

“kageyama was just yelling at me saying how my spike wasn’t even that great but I know you would’ve said it was good :((“

“aww shoyo, I’m sure it was! Don’t listen to him, ur trying ur best:))”

pet his hair

yes ur the one who’s sick but he misses u

will stop by ur house everyday

I mean he already does that

u usually help him with hw but he doesn’t think he shud ask u when u sleep

all his energy will just go p o o f when he sees u sleeping

he’ll prolly hear windchimes or smthing hahahah

but he’ll be able to sit quietly until you wake up

kageyama’s like HaaH???

SHH

but hinata’s tryna figure out his hw without u helping ok

once ur better, he’ll give you the bIGGGEST hug and sway you side to side AWW I MISS THOSE HUGS

and catch you up on evthing that’s happened

meaning everything that’s happened in the last 5 mins cos he already tells u everything 🙄

sawamura daichi

he’ll make sure you have everything for school

brings you your hw, explains to you the concepts

will call u during lunch or smthing cos it’s boring w/o you

dating him means ur automatically good friends with asahi and sugawara so they’ll check up on you too

and sugawara will tell you how daichi won’t stop talking abt how he can’t wait till u get better dhhdjfjdjs

sometimes you’ll catch him having tea with your mom on your front porch and she’s tryna embarrass you hahhsjdf

Ok but that scenario is just,,, so,,, hubby material yk

like he prolly came by to drop some food and ur moms making him stay and gushing abt how handsome he is

“so you’re the one making my y/n all happy”

rare occasions that daichi blushes #1

he’ll softly knock on ur door and u quickly pretend to be asleep

places sthing on ur desk then just leaves the s o f t e s t kiss on ur forehead and whispers sweet dreams GAHSJFOEJ

when he’s gone you look at what’s on ur desk and it’s a flower crown from ur first date 🥺

keep him ok

will prolly do sthing like throw paper airplanes at ur window

and then when he sees you open ur window he’ll hide behind a tree and watch as u go outside to pick them up

inside he’s written little notes like “get better!” Or “i miss you!” or “WHAT ARE U DOING AWAKE GO BACK TO SLEEP”

like sir u woke me up with all that tapping 🙄🤚🏻

once ur better, you walk into the vb gym first and u can hear him yelling at Tanaka and noya then when he sees u walk in he’s all “oh, y/n” 😌

PLS TANAKa and Noya WORSHIP U NOW SJDJSKKS

in the first couple of days you’re back he’ll still keep an eye on you and have his arm around your shoulder

occasionally putting his hand on your forehead and sneaking a kith 😚

kenma kozume

u didn’t tell him at first that u were sick but he still found out 🙄

“ur sick, aren’t you”

“huh?? No I’m not :((“

will look at u like this -_-

and yk if u stay home from school, he’ll find excuses to hang out in ur room

kuroo will be calling like “is freaking kenma there?!”

yea he’s spooning u

since ur sick, hE’ll be the one to pet ur hair

if it helps u fall asleep

won’t play games in ur room like he usually does cos he doesn’t want the sound and light to distract u

he’ll most likely bring u take out bc he can’t cook and will prolly burn down ur kitchen cos he got distrayced by the tv or smthing ahHa

will check ur temp like every 5 min I swear

“no- ko i rly don’t think my temp is gonna change every 5 min”

“but just in case-“

-_-

he’s smart ok so he’ll tutor you with late hw if u need it

will sit next to you and wiggle his toes by ur feet :3

once ur better, y’all go back to ur usual gaming and eat the hell out of junk food 🤪

a/n: rly hope u liked it 🥺💕 daichi’s was my fav hehe and TY @ilauvcoldpizza FOR HELPING ME W KENMA <3

haikyu!! masterlist

[exycuter]

Hey, hey, what are the seating arrangements on the roadtrip. I must know. Do they switch off? Do they stay the same no matter what? Who's in charge of snacks?

*chuckles and opens pandora’s box* 

OK OK SO andrew drives for most of it bc 1) its his car and 2) its His Car (control issues wheremst?). neil will occasionally swap out with him if its been like 10 hours but they don’t actually want to get pulled over and explain neil jostens highly dubious drivers license (’so was this a recent photo sir or…?’) so andrew sits in the drivers a good 80% of the time. kevin cant drive (Pathetic) (once when andrews passed tf out neil’s like ‘haha kev i dare u tho’ and kevin’s like ‘fuck off im not falling for that’ and neils like ‘oh so u CANT?? you’re saying u CANT is that what you’re saying ok sorry i just didnt know that u were UNABLE-’ and andrew jolts awake to screaming as they take a corner on two wheels at 60mph)

but that leaves the passenger seat and if u (andrew) thought for one second that ur 2 grown adult bfs would come to some sort of amicable agreement about who gets to sit shotgun well. you’d be fucking mistaken is what. neil and kevin can literally fight about the colour of the sky it’s absolutely INTOLERABLE and after the 47357293th ‘but its MY TURN’ andrew has a pounding headache and a white-knuckled grip on the wheel and he ends up just YELLING ‘SHUT the fuck up or i will turn this car the FUCK around’ and theres a beat of dead silence then neil snorts and giggles and kevin’s like ‘ok sorry mom’ and andrew swerves violently into a pothole and they all Scream again

but also: kevin whines about his legs getting cramps and he will not be silenced because kevin day is the ultimate bitch and neil just hasn’t got his true stamina when it comes to complaining. (also he does feel bad when kevin stumbles out of the car for the 4th time bc his legs have gone dead from being in the back. he refuses to lie out over two seats because thats not fucking safe seatbelt procedure neil. so neil lets him sit shotgun but will still obnoxiously take his shoes off and rest his feet on either side of kevin’s headrest #Resist!)

also VERY IMPORTANT: they get fucking lost. so many times. HOW does this happen in between andrew ‘we passed that already’ minyard and neil ‘i dont need a map i know a shortcut’ josten and kevin ‘we need to think about congestion’ day????? a mystery for the ages. so much shouting. neil’s always like ‘we are NOT lost’ and andrew just stalls the car and rolls down the window and dead eye looks at him as several cows from the surrounding field they’re in moo and kevin’s like ‘please….please can we just ASK for direc-’ and neil and andrew both shout ‘NO’

they do eventually always wind up where they’re meant to be (kind of) 

neil: see? all roads lead to rome! 

kevin: that’s not Technically True- 

andrew: slams the brakes and sets off the emergency airbags killing them all instantly

[wangdrew]

Water. Earth. Fire. Air. Long ago, the four nations lived together in harmony. Then, everything changed when the Fire Nation attacked. Only the Avatar, master of all four elements, could stop them, but when the world needed him most, he vanished. A hundred years passed and my brother and I discovered the new Avatar, an airbender named Wang. And although his airbending skills are great, he has a lot to learn before he’s ready to save anyone. But I believe Wang can save the world

my god this has been an emotional roller coaster

andrew rannells could fucking deck me and i would thank him

wangdrew is why god doesnt speak 2 us

cuz i want a tight knit wangily, i want a chat that makes cat jmemes

top ten anime betrayals

onceler pouting his lips and calling you pookie

tag urself i’m the slow decline of our general will to live

how does this gc turn from being pure to being pure sin in the span of 5 seconds im-

“I got flash backs from the Bee movie, which is also beeutiful”

this is why the falsettos proshoot is not on netflix

wangdrew wangells: the wang whisperer

whizzer is a twunk

sometimes i read sentences that make me want to abandon the internet and become amish//

its brandon uranover

bella thorne is my favourite type of pastry

“march of the voresettos” “march of the NOsettos”

maybe the real vore is the friends we made along the way

“NO VORE IN MY LOBBY” “NO NO IN MY NO”

“BACK FROM THE DAD™”

“Welcome back I hate it here”

“i’m just a vore, yeah i’m only a vore, and i’m voring here on capitol vore” chloe

“night guys im done w the vore” aren’t we all

“i’m gonNA MAKE THEM CRY WITH MY FISTS” chloe

“hello mr rannells sir, how lorge is ur wangus?” CJ

“welcome to hell lucy” Elise S

“gounod” chloe

swooty swooty coming for that booty

My mom, *ordering pizza, says it’ll deliver at 6:45*: “What fuck are they doing? Swimming to fucking Italy for the tomatoes?”

it comes with stickers and theres a whole section of the sticker sheet thats just andrew failing to do the jump on the album cover its so funny

cj is mothman???!! nOT clickbait

a vore blog just followed me

THEY FOUND US (chloe is cia)

there’s no way god would let this chat exist in his realm

ok but like am i the only one who hates when you’re in class working on some personal writing and someone leans over like “wHAt R u wRiTING??????” like your eulogy if you don’t back the fuck up you soggy lampshade

people found out christian was straight and were upset

“That you hate this gc?” “that too but mainly that i live in sweden”

are you fucking kidding me?? i was so happy, this endless hell could finally be over, all the supernatural fans who i forgot to unfollow will stop posting and i would be free, i was planning a party for the last day it airs and we would pointedly not watch it, i was going to cry of happiness, and instead,, This

Sophie

there were loads of theatre references in shrek too i think that’s bdj’s kink

groff dick pokes your eyes out even with its unimpressive length

i will stab you both with a rusty metal dildo

headline: groffs dick causes world war 3

“CAUSE OF DEATH: DILDO TO THE HEAD”

i sold it for my will to live

hey jess? what the fuck

hold on babes just gotta * loud cracking as he snaps off his velcro dick* ok

you’re in the bedroom with wangdrew. things are getting heated. you’re ready for the dicking down. everything is perfect, and you’re in love. he pauses, and whispers in your ear, “hey babes, just one sec”. he pulls away, leaving you wanting. there is a loud, resounding cracking, tearing noise, and wangdrew is holding his disembodied dick is his hand. he smiles. you smile.

me: why will no one date me also me: dick me down, rannells

moisten my gams kate(legs)

songs include: billy ray broke my achey break heart, wangdrews green coat, crusty june and clangy janet, and our true friend is vore

our new reality tv show, called “sometimes.. wangdrew is worse”

starring:

me as me phoebe as my favorite child chloe as vore queen cj as vorer anjie as sidekick monse as mongoose holli as opponent sophie as foolish mortal geneva as judgemental death bird jess as nutbox lucy as k i n k y kate as kinky kate kev as kinky kev haven as side salad claire as foul, loathsome, evil little cockroach reilly as commondore elise as flagelise grace as covenant kristyn as chicken pot pie amanda as kraken tasha as jigglytata asher as sneaky dorito sel as sergeant cactus cait as mcmuffin jill as diet scooby snack and faith as medalling kid

“Good mother fucking morning I am going to school wtf”

“THE DICKS CAME OUT OF NOWHERE”

“2 inches of nothing”

pe poole

Hey what’s poppin’ my name is Jake Paul I’m here in the *pans up to ‘team 10 house’* Team 10 House, I hope you are having a good day hope you’re smiling hope you’re working hard I hope you *pans out to dab* dabbin’ on them haters

hey what’s up selina reeviers, if you’re new here my name is selina reevie and i’m here in the wangdrew groupchat, i hope you’re having an awesome day, i hope you’re listening to musicals, i hope you’re *whips* whipping on the hetros and let’s GET BACK TO CRYING

Skinny beetles = Skaneateles

the only 2 genders *walks up to a straight couple* so which one of you is the jazz choir and which one is the gospel choir

Chloe: what’s a good free website Jess: google.com Solie: THE SARCASM

my whole brand is made off of andrew memes

rt! the wangdrew blog is basically an archive of all our mistakes

He gad it mumming He gad it mumming He gonly gad gimself to maine

Jizzer Brown

cronch the fucking pickle man

Good Morning Everyone My Only Mood Is Death

cunt nugget

youre on punkd lucy

ok but like am i the only one who hates when you’re in class working on some personal writing and someone leans over like “wHAt R u wRiTING??????” like your eulogy if you don’t back up you soggy lampshade

Happy VORE 🍴 lentine’s day! Hope you’re ready to get some 🍫 chocolate from your special someone ❤💋!! And mayBEE 🐝 you can give them a special 😉 SURPRISE ☝💋 and VORE 😱👅👄 their CANDY 🍭🍬🍭 ASS 🍑! Send this to 10 of your TASTIEST 🍰 friends this VORELENTINE’S DAY 👄👅🙀! Get 🔟 back and you’re the TASTIEST 😋 EVER! Get 5 back and you’re GETTING SOME 👄 MOUTH ACTION 👅 Get 3 back and you’re TOTALLY VOREABLE 😋🐯🍑! Get 1 back and you’re either a VORER 👄🍭😉 or SAD

Hi! 💁😋 I’m so happy 😁😆you’ve applied for the 🎭musical 🎼group chat, we’re over a hundred 💯people who want to make new friends 👯👯‍♂ and that’s so exciting!😜 I saw 👀👀that you were okay 👌 with using Whatsapp 💬as a platform and so I was wondering 🤔if you could give me your number📲 so that I can add you?😘 I’m very excited 😝😊and hope 🙏🙏that this will work out for everyone!!😂😂😍🤳🙌