#so i figured i'd wait to share til it came back online

[glitteringconstellations]

Beacon Chapter 6: so eden sank to grief

“We should have never left the island.”

In any other situation, Masina thought, the familiar mutterings of her father would have comforted her. In any other situation, she would have rolled her eyes, a fond smile crossing her lips as her mother scolded him for being such a stubborn old man.

Now, it only served to frighten her more, because she could hear the tremor in her father’s voice.

She clung to her father’s hand as they were marched along, her mother’s arm tight around her shoulder from the other side. Even sheltered between them, Masina felt so terribly small. The alien soldiers towered over them, guns trained on the group at large. They even dwarfed her father, an imposing man of impressive height and girth by any other standard. They moved so mechanically that Masina wasn’t sure if they weren’t actually robots. That didn’t make them any less terrifying.

They’d been walking—shuffling, more like—for hours, as the aliens rounded up more and more people at gunpoint without a word. The town wasn’t very big, so Masina recognized most of the people in the crowd. Classmates, neighbors. All looking equally as scared as she felt.

“Where are they taking us?” Masina whispered, peering above the heads of the crowd in front of her. A massive purple ship loomed over the horizon, and as far as she could tell, the path they marched on led right to it. The crowd wasn’t silent, but everyone kept their voices down. No one wanted to be noticed.

“I don’t know,” her mother replied, her voice just as hushed. “It’ll be alright, darling. We just have to stick together.” She tightened her hold around Masina’s shoulders, offering a strained smile. It brought Masina a small amount of comfort.

Read on AO3

“We should have never left the island,” her father muttered again, his eyes flickering to the alien sentries that lined either side of the crowd. Masina looked up at him, and even she could see the fear beneath the mutinous rage on his face. “I told you moving to the mainland was a bad idea.”

And he had. It was an old argument, but one of the only times she’d ever heard her brother fight with their father. The thought made tears sting at the corners of Masina’s eyes now, hearing his impassioned voice in her ears as though the words had been said yesterday.

Hunk—laid-back, friendly, nervous Hunk—had never once raised his voice at his father, until that day. The day he’d dropped the manila envelope on the table like he’d dropped a bomb on all of them.

“I’m going to study engineering at the Garrison, Dad!”

Masina missed her brother something awful. Despite herself, she wondered what Hunk would do, if he were here now. Probably throw up all over the place. The thought might have made her laugh, once. Now, she just thought perhaps it was more merciful that he was spared all this.

“Life was simple on the island. Safe. None of this space invader alien business. But no,” her father continued. Masina whimpered as he squeezed her hand tighter, pulled her closer, to the point where it hurt. “My son had to go and complicate things for all of us, had to go and uproot the entire family—”

“Dear, this isn’t the time,” her mother chided softly, yet there was a tense edge to her voice. Her father kept on as though he hadn’t heard her interruption.

“—just had to go to that fancy school, and then what happened? He and his buddies went and got themselves blown up—”

“That’s enough, Sefa!” her mother hissed.

Masina winced in between them, drawing her shoulders in as though she could curl in on herself. It was bad enough that they’d lost Hunk, but she hated hearing her father blame him like the aliens invading were his fault. Her father drew his lips together in a tight line and said nothing more.

A hush fell over the crowd as they’d drawn closer to the great ship. Masina could see, now that they stood in the looming shadow the monstrosity cast, that the aliens intended to load them all onto it. There were different kinds of soldiers here, and Masina couldn’t stifle the gasp when she realized she’d been right about the sentries being robots. These new soldiers were flesh and blood aliens, tall and menacing with wicked yellow eyes, surveying the group like a farmer might his crops.

She couldn’t help it—she started trembling.

It started at the base of her spine and radiated out until she could feel it down to her fingertips. Her breath started coming in ragged spurts and her heart lurched unpleasantly somewhere in her throat. Fear pulsed in her veins and her feet stuttered beneath her.

Not now, not now… she thought fruitlessly. Now was not the time for a panic attack. Her mother whispered soothing words in her ear, keeping a wary eye on the soldiers they passed and a steady arm around Masina’s shoulder as they made the first ascent up the ramp into the ship.

“Just breathe, darling, breathe…”

Masina clenched her eyes shut tight, both to clear the frustrated tears that burned her eyes and so that she didn’t have to see the ship. She focused on her mother’s words, on steadying the inhale and exhale of her breath, letting her father’s grip on her hand ground her and guide her.

“Oho, what have we here?”

The voice was cold and gravely, and Masina’s eyes snapped open in terror. One of the alien soldiers was peering down at her, all eight feet and some odd inches with a terrifying grin on his face. He held a hefty weapon with ease, tossed carelessly over his shoulder. Masina could have sworn she felt her heart stop dead in her chest at the predatory look he focused directly down at her.

“Look, Arzok, the whelp is so scared it can’t breathe straight,” the soldier called over his shoulder.

She felt her father take a step in front of her and her mother, throwing an arm out protectively. “Stay away from my daughter,” he snarled with all the rage he could muster.

The laugh the soldier barked out made Masina’s blood run cold. “Or what? You intend to fight me, Earthling?” In a blink, the solider reached an arm out and backhanded her father with what seemed merely a flick of his wrist. Her father cried out in pain, the force of it sending him crashing to the floor yards away from them, taking several people down with him.

“Dad!” Masina cried, at the same time her mother shouted, “Joseph!” They both made to move to his side, but the soldier called Arzok moved swiftly, aiming his weapon directly at her father’s head. The people around the small family flinched away, clearing a wide berth around them.

The first soldier chuckled. “Pathetic.” Masina only saw him moving toward her out of the corner of her eye, and by then it was too late. She drew in a sharp inhale as the soldier knelt in front of her and took her face in one of his massive hands, claws digging painfully into her cheeks.

“You Earthlings are so fearful. It’s delicious,” the soldier said, turning her head side to side as though he were examining a particularly interesting specimen. Masina knew she was whimpering, but she couldn’t hear it over the rush of her own heart pounding in ears. She stared into those wicked eyes, wide-eyed herself and terrified, and she cringed back into her mother as far as the soldier’s grip allowed her.

“P-please don’t hurt her,” her mother begged behind her. Masina could feel her mother’s arm still on her shoulder, trying to pull her away from the threat. The soldier snorted derisively.

“You’re of no use to us dead. Can’t exactly use the quintessence of a corpse.” The soldier brought Masina’s face back to center, that wicked grin never leaving his face. “Though, it’s a pity we can’t use you for arena fodder.”

The soldier clapped his leathery hand against her face once, before he finally, finally let go. Masina sagged against her mother, her legs not having the strength to hold her up. The solider straightened and turned to Arzok.

“Separate the men and women from the whelps. If they resist, subdue them, but under no circumstances are you allowed to kill. We need to get them to the Druids alive. Am I understood?” Arzok saluted and uttered something in another language.

“Yes, Commander Korok.”

Masina looked up just in time to see one of the sentry robots grab her mother under each arm, dragging her away. She scrambled to her feet, reaching out for her as her mom writhed and screamed in the robot’s grasp. “Let her go, you creep!” Adrenaline fueled her as he pounded at the sentry’s arms, tugging and yanking.

“No! Masina! Natia!”

Masina wheeled around to see another sentry gripping her father by both arms, easily restraining him as he struggled. Desperate tears filled her eyes as the robots dragged her parents in opposite directions. A third sentry grabbed Masina around her midsection and she shrieked in panic and fear, thrashing as hard as she could as she was lifted off her feet.

“Let me go! Mom, Dad!” Her mother’s words from earlier echoed hollowly in her ears—they needed to stay together! It would be alright if they just stayed together!

Screams quickly filled the air as sentry robots filed in, dragging children from their parents and spouses from each other. Masina could feel the panic overwhelming her, but still she struggled, kicking and screaming and biting.

Something hard cuffed her over the head, and the cacophony was suddenly muted as darkness curled in around the edges of her eyes.

---

Three days.

It’d been three days since Julio found his mother in the mess of people that had gathered in the bunker beneath the military base in Havana. Cell phone reception had been all but annihilated, and the last message he’d gotten from his mother was that she was at the base and had gotten his little siblings on an evac shuttle.

For that, Julio thought, God was merciful.

Those who didn’t get a spot on a shuttle had been hastened into the nuclear bunker. Julio counted himself lucky, that his fishing vessel couldn’t set sail due to choppy seas that fateful day what seemed like ages ago. Luck and luck alone had him run into his father and sister, when they’d come to find him at the docks, that they had made it into the bunker before the bombs started falling and they had to close the doors.

Luck alone, that he’d found his mother at all, before the military had called for volunteers.

“Mijo, please, don’t do this,” his mother pleaded. She sat on the cot she’d been given, Isabel’s arm around her shoulder as she murmured comforting words. In her lap, she clutched a broken picture frame, the glass having fallen out in the chaos when Isabel grabbed it from their home. Julio had reamed her for risking her life for it, but in the end, he was grateful, if only because of the way their mother had latched on to it. “Luis, tell him not to do this.”

His father sat quietly on the cot opposite them, and his silence spoke more than Julio thought he had words for. The man had always been one of few words, and Julio knew without him saying that were it not for his age, he’d have taken up a gun himself to join Julio and the others.

“Mamá, I have to,” Julio said solemnly. The rifle they’d given him sat propped against the cot, a heavy elephant between them all. “We can’t just sit here and wait for… for them to come find us. We have to fight.”

Julio’s eyes flickered down to the photo in her hands, the ever-grinning face of his kid brother staring up at them from the broken frame. Julio was a terrible hypocrite—he knew Lance would be the first to take up arms against a planetary takeover, and yet if he was here, Julio would do the same thing to him that his mother was doing now.

If Lance was here… Julio shuddered. Even in his grief, he recognized small mercies when he saw them. He thanked God Lance hadn’t lived to see the fall of Earth. Lance would have been devastated.

“It’s a suicide mission! You don’t stand a chance against these things!” his mother cried, her fingers tightening around the frame so much so that her knuckles turned white. “I can’t… I can’t lose another child, mijo.”

Julio’s eyes softened. “Oh, Mamá…” He reached out across the space between them, pulling her into an embrace. Isabel kept rubbing circles on her back, looking dangerously near tears herself.

She knew that if they didn’t try, they were all doomed anyway, Julio was aware of this. He knew she knew that no matter how slim their odds were, they had to take the chance. He knew, in truth, she meant I can’t see another child die before me.

“I have to try,” Julio murmured into his mother’s hair. She wept quietly into his broad shoulder, tears staining his already ruined shirt. “We don’t know where Abuelo and Abuelita and Tía Alma are. Sissy and Al and the babies are somewhere out in space. We can’t find them and bring them all home if we don’t try.”

“Jules is right, Mamá,” Isabel said, her voice a watery shadow of her usual confident self. “And he’s strong. If anyone will come back, it’s him.” She managed a smile up at him, reaching her other arm up to draw him in for a half-hug. “If you don’t, I’ll find you and kill you myself.”

Julio huffed out a weak chuckle at that. Ever the firecracker, his sister.

There was an announcement over the PA, then, calling for all volunteers to rendezvous at the northernmost end of the bunker. His mother let out an aborted sob, clinging tighter to Julio. It broke his heart to pull away from her after one last hug, and one more for Isabel.

His father stood with him, placing a weathered, darkened hand firmly on his shoulder. “Vaya con Dios, mijo,” his father said. There was a telltale brightness in his eyes, and Julio couldn’t take it—he pulled his father in for a tight embrace, as well.

“Si muero antes de regresar, le pido al Dios que se lleve mi alma,” Julio whispered in his father’s ear. His father only whispered Amen in return, before pulling away, reaching down, and pressing the rifle in Julio’s hands. Julio took a bracing breath, squared his shoulders, and turned to leave.

“Give ‘em hell, Jules,” Isabel called out after him. Her voice was stronger, familiar. Grounding.

Give ‘em hell? Oh, he could do that.

---

In the days since she and Florence had been plucked from her storm cellar, Colleen had come to realize a couple of things.

The first thing was that the aliens clearly wanted them alive and able, for the most part. They’d let her leave out some food and water for Rover before forcing her to abandon him there, as long as she didn’t put up a fuss. And of course she wouldn’t—Florence couldn’t handle any roughing up, and she didn’t want to risk it.

Besides, she’d seen what’d happened to the ones who resisted. They’d live, she was sure, but perhaps it’d be more merciful to put them out of their misery by that point.

The second thing she’d gathered was that the aliens were waiting. For what, or who, she didn’t know. But she and Florence had been herded along onto some kind of massive ship, forced to strip, and given prison garments to wear. Indignant, Colleen had done her best to try and preserve as much of Florence’s modesty as possible, the poor thing. But then they’d been shoved in a cell and… nothing. For days, if she had to hazard a guess, but she couldn’t keep track of time with no light from the outside.

They were given water at regular intervals, and what had to be some kind of nutrient bar, if she could manage to stomach the taste of what had to be rancid garbage and roaches. They were allowed from the cell one at a time, once every three water cycles, to relieve themselves. And she didn’t think they’d left Earth, unless the ship was so large that she couldn’t feel it moving. There were about fifteen other people crammed into the cell with them, but no one seemed willing to make friends with strangers. She couldn’t exactly blame them.

“How are you holding up, Florence?” she asked quietly, shortly after the twelfth time they’d been given water.

“Oh, I’m an old woman. You don’t have to worry about me,” Florence replied, her eyes crinkling up in a small smile. Her voice betrayed her weariness, though, and it hadn’t escaped Colleen’s notice that she hadn’t been able to keep any nutrient bars down, either.

Colleen reached over and took one of Florence’s hand in both of hers. “I’m so sorry, Florence. You shouldn’t have gotten stuck in this mess with me.”

At this, Florence chuckled, squeezing Colleen’s fingers between her own gnarled ones. “I can think of no one I’d rather be stuck with in this mess, dear, except perhaps my late husband. You and Samuel always took good care of me.”

Colleen’s heart ached in her chest at the mention of her own late husband. But she was touched, truly, by the old woman’s words. She managed a smile of her own, feeling for the first time in a long, long while like she wasn’t truly alone.

But as the hours stretched into hours, the tension between the prisoners in their cell seemed to mount. No one dared asked the guards what was happening, when they appeared briefly to give them water. Until finally, after the twenty-sixth time they were given water, they received orders, as well.

“Form a queue,” a deep voice barked, and Colleen nearly leapt out of her skin. She wasn't the only one. Warily, the other prisoners formed a line, her and Florence somewhere near the center, and they were led to what seemed to be a courtroom.

At the center of the room was a single chair, behind which stood five tall, cloaked figures, their faces obscured by white, bird-like masks. Something about them sent ice coursing through Colleen’s veins, and her arms came up to hug herself unconsciously. They were just standing there, and yet she already feared them more than the alien soldiers.

“One at a time; sit,” the soldier ordered. The boy at the front of the line—Colleen’s heart ached again, seeing how young he was, thinking he looked like he might have been around Matt’s age—flinched back into the person behind him. The soldier grabbed the boy by the meat of his upper arm and dragged him across the room.

“No, no, no, please, no,” the boy stammered. He didn’t resist when thrown into the chair; instead, he shrank into it, like it would protect him from whatever was coming. The rest of them were lined up along the far wall opposite the hooded figures.

The soldier gave the remaining prisoners a menacing glare for good measure, a threat without words to stay put. He then turned back to the boy in the chair, procuring a data tablet.

“This is a gauge that will tell me if you are lying,” the soldier said, giving the tablet a brief wave. “You are to answer the questions honestly.”

The boy didn’t move. The soldier took it as acknowledgement, anyway.

“State your name.”

“…Aaron,” the boy whispered, at length. The data tablet buzzed loudly, and the boy sat up ramrod straight, fear in his eyes.

“Do not lie,” the soldier warned.

“I-I’m not lying! My name is Aaron! Aaron Michael Cox!” When the data tablet didn’t buzz this time, the boy sagged in relief bag into the chair. The soldier paused, considering the boy, before continuing his questioning.

“What do you know about Voltron?”

“I…” the boy looked wildly to the person who stood behind him in line. “I don’t know what that is.” The data tablet was blissfully silent, and Colleen let out a breath she didn’t know she’d been holding. A hand brushed hers and she flinched, whirling around. But it was just Florence, behind her, reaching out a hand to hold. Colleen took it gratefully.

The line of questioning continued, something about “the Resistance” and different planets Colleen had never heard the names of. When, after ten minutes, the data pad remained silent, the soldier waved an arm and two sentries appeared.

“Take him to the arena. No sense wasting an able body. We’ll reap the quintessence from him later.”

The boy looked like he might faint. “Wait, please, I answered all your questions! I didn’t lie to you, why are you doing this? Please, stop!” His voice trailed off as he was dragged away, desperate pleas echoing until they faded to silence. Colleen has to swallow past a lump in her throat.

The interrogations continued, some being dragged off to the arena, and some being dismissed to a work camp, if the soldier’s commands were anything to go by. A handful were led into the next room by the hooded figures themselves. Colleen felt her heart racing faster and faster as the queue dwindled before her until at last, she found herself walking on unsteady legs to the chair.

From this angle, the soldier looked even taller and even more intimidating, and Colleen had to resist the urge to shrink into it like Aaron did. She still had some pride left in her, after all. So despite how she trembled, she sat up tall, her shoulders squared. From across the room, Florence gave her a reassuring smile.

“State your name.”

“Colleen Renee Holt,” Colleen replied, her voice as steady as she could manage.

The data tablet was silent, but the soldier was not. “Tch, another Holt,” he muttered, but Colleen heard it loud and clear. “Pains in my ass, the lot of them.”

The words left her lips before she could stop them. “You’ve met other Holts before?” Her heart still raced, but now it was for a different reason. She sat up straighter in her chair, gripping the arms so tightly she felt her fingers might break.

The soldier leveled her with a narrow gaze. “You were not permitted to speak outside of the questioning.”

“Please, I have to know! Where have you met other—”

“Silence!” the soldier barked, and Colleen recoiled like she’d been slapped.

“A moment,” said a quiet voice from behind her, and Colleen’s stomach lurched uncomfortably. She didn’t know how else to describe the voice but terrifying, the mere tone of it making her hair at the back of her neck stand on end. One of the hooded figures moved to stand before her, and if she believed in magic she would have been sure it’d cast a hex on her, so paralyzed by fear she felt.

The figure laid a spindly, clammy hand down on her forehead, fingers splayed open. Colleen sucked in a sharp breath as she felt the figure pulling at her mind, memories summoned forth like a slideshow. She felt her eyes rolling into the back of her head and she was helpless to stop it.

Calling Katie and Matt down from the roof well past their bedtime. Supper with her family on the eve of the big day. Meeting Takashi and his protégé, the day she sent Samuel and Matt off on the Kerberos mission. The memories seemed to pause on that last memory, her inner eye lingering on their faces against her will.

The memories flashed forward. News of the Kerberos mission failing catastrophically. Katie insisting she could find proof that it didn’t go awry. Her and Katie fighting about sending her to a girls’ school, that it was for her own good.

Seeing the missing cadets’ faces flash on the news, seeing her daughter’s picture there with the name Matt had given her beside her own maiden name. Seeing the footage of the explosions. There was a humming noise, like the figure found something curious, and the images shifted.

There was her boy, and her husband, and Takashi, forced to their knees before the same kind of aliens, still in their spacesuits. Her Matt, dressed in the very same prison garb she now wore, a knife presented to him. Takashi attacking him, a wild look upon his face. Matt, a gash clear from his temple and down his cheek as he writhed on the ground before a looming enemy. A poster of Matt, labeled enemy combatant, kill on sight.

When the hand withdrew at last, Colleen sucked in a gasp of air like she’d been drowning. Tears she didn’t know she’d shed streaked down her face. What little was on her stomach roiled, and with a heave she leaned over the side of the chair and retched.

“Curious,” the hooded figure said, no inflection in its voice whatsoever. It turned to the soldier, who scowled at it. “We may desire to use her.”

The soldier scoffed. “You Druids do as you please, regardless. Take her.”

Matt was alive. Her son was alive. They wanted to kill him, and they wanted to use her to do it.

“No,” she croaked, wiping the corner of her mouth with her sleeve. The soldier and the Druid turned to her, slightly startled. “I won’t do it. You won’t use me to kill my son. You might as well kill me now.”

The soldier merely quirked an eyebrow, exchanged a glance with the Druid. “You ought to be careful what you wish for, Earthling.”

Then there was excruciating pain. It was unlike anything Colleen had ever felt before—like every nerve in her body was simultaneously on fire and being electrified. A scream tore from her throat and she pitched forward, falling out of the chair to writhe on the floor in pain.

As soon as the pain had started, it ceased. Colleen was left panting on the floor, clenching her eyes shut. The Druid had scarcely lifted a finger.

Colleen gritted her teeth and fought for breath, summoning the energy to glare at both of them. “Come on,” she gasped. “Kill me. Do it, because I won’t help you.”

The pain came again, for longer this time, but Colleen was ready. She bit down on her lip, snapped her eyes shut, and clenched her fists so hard the nails dug into her palms. The Druid didn’t seem to let up this time, though, and the thought flit across her mind that maybe it would actually kill her.

“Stop it!”

In an instant, the pain stopped. Colleen could barely hear past the buzzing in her ears, but there was a muffled shout, followed by what could only be horrified screams from the few people left lined up along the far wall.

A thump came only a few feet away from her, so close that Colleen felt the whoosh of air as something hit the ground. Steeling herself, she braced herself up on both forearms and managed to lift herself a few inches from the ground before she opened her eyes.

A low moan escaped her lips. “No, God… please…” Tears sprung anew as she reached a trembling hand out.

Florence laid spread eagle on the ground between her and the Druid, her eyes wide-open and glassy. She was dead.

[borathae]

~Chapter 26~ I just want to say I LOVED this chapter so much. Them making up and all the fluff 😚👌💕 My heart really needed that. Also how you describe Namjoon in your story is exactly how i think he is in real life. Like always having some really well worded advice that sounds so well thought out but he didn't even have to think about it that hard, it just comes naturally to him. Where does one find a Namjoon? And the tea part? Excuse me? That was a whole movie moment. 😭 Eternity biiitch 😭 I had literally so many song options for this chapter but at some point I had to stop myself lol

🖤 My Everything - Ariana Grande

In this chapter or rather in the time between this & the last chapter oc accepts that she wants jungkook back in her life and said let's work on what we have bc it's far too powerful & special to just dismiss it because someone made a mistake which can be worked out. I think she always knew this but now she accepted it. "I've cried enough tears to see my own reflection in them and then it was clear, I can't deny I really miss it." I think oc realised this especially once jk revealed he needs time to think and that's when it hit oc that he might not come back and that she actually can't live without him. "To think that I was wrong, I guess you don't know what you got 'til it's gone. Pain is just a consequence of love. I'm saying sorry for the sake of us. He wasn't my everything 'til we were nothing. And it's taken me a lot to say. And now that he's gone, my heart is missing something so it's time to push my pride away 'cause you are, you are, you are my everything."

🖤 It's Gotta Be You - Isaiah Firebrace

I actually think this song represents both their povs. "I hear a million voices in my head telling me the things I should have said. I don't know why I let you go, oh I learned the hard way. Tell me it's not too late. Now my arms are open wide, they're hanging forever there, waiting forever, for you. I won't give up on you this time cause I ain't holding up, for nobody else. It's gotta be you."

🖤 Blind (Acoustic) - PRETTYMUCH

I can just see jungkookie laying alone in a motel bed pretending this is seriously over, crying himself to sleep and when he closes his eyes all he sees is oc. "I lose my mind before I see you and I separated, no I'm so scared to lose you, never choosing to let go. Love's so fragile, anything could happen, and we know. Hearts made of glass, but somehow we last. Yeah we made it, no I would rather be without vision 'fore I ever watch you leave. [...] I'd be better off blind. [...] When I close my eyes all I think about is you."

🖤 Here To Stay - Josh Devine

Jungkookie is here to stay 😭 "My heart on the line, so you'll never doubt the mountains I'd climb for us now. It's all about us now. I fooled my heart, let it break. I know this time we won't fade cause all my love's here to stay. [...] Through the dark fight our way. I know this time I can change. [...] I'm giving up everything for this, we'll figure it out I promise."

🖤 Call You Mine - The Chainsmokers & Bebe Reha

I'm sorry but that's literally their story if you replace bar with diner. "When we thought that we couldn't get higher things started looking down. I look at you and you look at me like nothing but strangers now. Two kids with their hearts on fire, don't let it burn us out. Think about what you believe in now, am I someone you cannot live without? 'Cause I know I don't wanna live without you, yeah come on, let's turn this all around. Bring it all back to that bar downtown when you wouldn't let me walk out on you, yeah. You said, 'Hey, what you doing for the rest of your life?' and I said, 'I don't even know what I'm doing tonight'. Went from one conversation to your lips on mine and you said, 'I never regretted the day that I called you mine'."

🖤 Fire Meet Gasoline - Sia

This is what I imagine playing when oc just can't take it anymore and literally throws herself at jk and they hug so tight he can't breathe 😭💖 "I ache for love, ache for us, why don't you come, don't you come a little closer. So come on now, strike the match, strike the match now. We're a perfect match, perfect somehow, we were meant for one another, come a little closer. Flame you came from me, fire meet gasoline. [...] I'm burning alive. I can barely breathe, when you're here loving me." Also "I got all I need, when you came after me"

🖤 Can't Help Falling in Love - Haley Reinhart / Kina Grannis

Those are two separate covers but I just can't decide between them. You know just the whole 'so you really want me to stay?' 'yes we complete each other' vibe. "Shall I stay? Would it be a sin if I can't help falling in love with you? Like a river flows surely to the sea. Darling, so it goes, some things are meant to be. Take my hand, take my whole life too. For I can't help falling in love with you."

🖤 Best Years - 5 Seconds of Summer

This relates to the last chapter where jk realised he wants to build a life with oc. And this just sounds exactly like something he would say to her when they're sitting together on the couch 😢 "You've got a million reasons to hesitate but darling, the future's better than yesterday. [...] Gave you a million reasons to walk away. But I'll build a house out of the mess and all the broken pieces. I'll make up for all of your tears. I'll give you the best years. [...] I promise, darling, you won't regret the best years."

🖤 Black And White - Niall Horan

Same as the previous song and also this is literally their story. "That first night we were standing at your door fumbling for your keys, then I kissed you, ask me if I want to come inside 'cause we didn't want to end the night. [...] Yeah, I see us in black and white, crystal clear on a star lit night in all your gorgeous colors. I promise that I'll love you for the rest of my life. See you standing in your dress, swear in front of all our friends there'll never be another. I promise that I'll love you for the rest of my life. Now, we're sitting here in your living room telling stories while we share a drink or two. And there's a vision I've been holding in my mind, we're 65 and you ask 'When did I first know?' I always knew."

Okay, okay so I gotta go on and hurry up with replying to your messages fjsdfjas. Excuse my lazy ass, but I really want to take my time with your messages and saDLY online classes didn’t let me until now 😔🤧

Honestly I totally agree with you, this is highkey how I imagine Namjoon to be in real life as well. Also no joke, working on Namjoon was always so much. I really loved his parts in the story. They were so healing for me to write hahfhads 💜 

Also I am literally so happy that you enjoyed Chapter 26 so much, it is one of my favourite chapters from the story as well. It is just so healing and cute. Like that part when Kook makes her all laugh and Namjoon is all like “damn that bitch laughs really weirdly” but Kook is all like heart eyes for her. do yOU HEAR ME CRYING IN MY ROOM?? 😔😭💜

Imma put the rest under “read more” because your bitch has a lot to say hahHAH

My Everything - Ariana Grande

Your description just hIT me like a truck. HAHAHHA BYE I am laughing in pain 😭😭 Oh god I don’t even know what to add because you described it just so perfectly well 😭😭 I caN’t here I am cryIng at the first song you recommended 😔

It’s Gotta Be You - Isaiah Firebrace

Okay lis t EN I am :( I will literally start sobbing right here and now 😭 like omfg that part when he is all like “When you walked away my heart tried to replace ya with someone like you, but I could never find it. I don't want to find it.” if that isn’t the reader trying to move on with Hoseok but realising just how much she needs Kook. But also at same time it’s Kook all trying to pretend that they have broken up, but ending up crying every night because he misses her so much. I will now cry 😭😭

Blind (Acoustic) - PRETTYMUCH

Okay you just changed my mind, this is IT. This is most definitely Kook being all sad and heartbroken in his motel room. Nooo lisTEN I AM FAR TOO EMOTIONAL I AM SOBBING :( Okay but also this part, listen this part: “I'm so scared to lose you, never choosing to let go [...] When I close my eyes all I think about is you. This is real love.” if that isnt them being all like “I’ll never let go again” later when they are cuddling in bed :( 

Here To Stay - Josh Devine

Okay... why are those lyrics literally so damn accurate?? Help I am scared? They are literally so accurate hgnfgnan bYE 😭😭😭 also omfg I didn’t know this song and I freaking love their voices. They just HIT right 😭 I can’t jajsdj like every song you’ve recommended as of now made me cry (in a good way) 😭 like just that part “We'll figure it out I promise cause all my love's here to stay.“ I will throw myself away 😭

Call You Mine - The Chainsmokers feat. Bebe Rexa

listen anonie I wanna smooch you. I do not know how you always manage to find songs that just F I T so right, I am comBUSTING 😭😭 gosh this is giving me such hardcore memories of how it felt like to start writing this story (lil fun fact for you guys, exactly one year ago I started working on the Cocktail Trilogy 😔) I can’t this would fit so well to a lil flashback, showing all the amazing times they had together. Like them just driving down the coast, the reader has her arms around his waist while Kook is sneaking a glance her way and smiles. Like just imagine 😭

Fire Meet Gasoline - Sia 

Omg the moment you described 😭 this is it. I can imagine it so clearly. How Kooks eyes widen in surprise at first before they flutter closed. How he nuzzles his face into her shoulder and twists her sweater in his fingers so she would never leave again. How she is squeezing her eyes shut and twisting his hair to press him even closer. Now that they are finally together again it feels so right. The world could burst into flames all around them and yet they wouldn’t let go. Nothing matters for them except the other person. 

And now I made myself sOB again  😔😭

Can’t Help Falling in Love - Hayley Reinhart / Kina Grannis

OKAY LISTEN NO JOKE I LISTENED TO THE KINA GRANNIS COVER WHILST WORKING ON THAT CHAPTER! I love that song so much and holy shit the lines you chOSE YES!! 😭😭 this is song is them 100%, I don’t make the rules and I thank you for recommending it 😭😭

Best Years - 5 Seconds of Summer 

Anonie you are out to make me cry 😭😭 (first of all I love 5sos so much) HOLY SHIT LISTEN THIS IS TOO MUCH 😭😭 I can’t, I literally can’t. This just broke me HHAHSH 😭😭 like if that song isn’t the moment when he is all like “you won’t regret it I promise. I’ll make you so happy.” liKE HOLY FUCK MY HEART IS ACHING 😭😭 anonie seriously thANk YOU, you don’t even want to know how often I have listened to this song whilst working on Purple Rain. Good god, this just awoke so many memories 😭

Black and White - Niall Horan

ANOTHER SONG I CONSTANTLY LISTENED TO WHILST WORKING ON PURPLE RAIN 😔 anonie I can’t believe that three songs of my “writing songs” also made you think of Purple Rain. Fuck I can’t, I’m currently listening to it and I am sobbing HAHAHH 😭 like okAY listen, do you want to know which scene I always think about when I listen to that song? The one day when Kook took her to a junkyard and then when they later drove up a mountain to watch the city. And it’s that moment when they are both just like screaming on top of their lungs and then end up falling into each others arms because they are just so goddamn fucking alive when they are together 😔

Honestly anonie thank you. This playlist was such an emotional rollercoaster to listen to (in a good way). Holy shit it awoke so many memories and fuck, you just get me and my story 😔 thank you anonie, I really fucking love you 😔💜