#so on the bar about censoring the name miles. im so paranoid I will call him miles here and someone will think i mean from spiderverse

[microwavetoaster-selfships]

This was supposed to be a paragraph long shitpost, but it somehow turned into a full blown drabble, which is mind boggling to me how that happened, haha!

It's unedited, so if there's any punctuation or any other sorts of errors it's cause all I did was write it and post it. I normally only ever write from third person so this was quite interesting!

Sitting with A.xlerod in his car after a drive out to who knows where, maybe there wasn't even a destination, and it's dark outside and really late at night and we're parked outside the building to his flat/apartment and I'm sitting there and he knows something is on my mind and the hum of the car still running is audible and he doesn't say anything he just kinda looks over at me concerned and questioning and I know he's looking over at me and I sigh trying to get the sudden weight off my chest but the more I think about it I can just feel it twist and get a bit worse and there's a sudden straining pain the back of my throat for a few split seconds.

I reach my hand over to the side of the seat and pull back on the lever that leans the seat back and I sit there for a few moments laid back a bit. I know he's still looking at me with a concerned look and I take a deep breath as I'm about to say something, just to have all the words taken right back out of me again. I know this feeling, I feel it time and time again, and I know exactly how it makes me feel and yet there's still no label for it. It's too complex.

"Kane?" He quietly calls my name, trying to bring me back to the present. He looks like he wants to ask what's wrong, but he doesn't need to.

I take another deep breath, and end up holding it. Every time I want to speak it just gets lodged up. I can't help but shake my head and ponder at if something happened that made me like this. If somethings happened.

"Miles..?" Was just about all I could get out. I normally don't call him Miles often. I don't know why, I had just gotten into the habit of calling him A.xlerod for some reason.

"Kane?" He said in response.

"Do you..." I had to fight for my words, "Do you ever feel like you can't talk?...Like you can't...speak?"

He was only quiet for a moment, "In what sense?" He asked.

"Like... It's all just nothingness. Weightless." I was trying to analyze the visuals my brain created and communicate it into sensible words, "Like, it just doesn't matter. That it holds the importance of..." I kept having to pause for several moments, my brain just couldn't fathom forming words at the moment.

But he waited. He didn't interrupt and he let me finish my statement, even if it was an empty one.

"Do you think anyone ever thinks about the factory that their T-shirt comes from?" I finally asked.

He looked a little confused at first. But the longer the short silence went on I could see him start to understand.

"Like.. do you think anyone ever really listens to the different noises their oven makes? Thst anyone really cares about hearing their stove turn on? Do you think anyone enjoys hearing their alarms go off?"

He wrapped his arms around his stearing wheel and leaned up against it, looking off into the distance, "I listen."

I don't know why it was surprising for me to hear. I didn't know my eyebrows were furrowed and my lips were tense until my expression loosened and dropped. Do you really? I wanted to ask. But I felt like I'd come off wrong if I said it outloud.

"How many people do you think enjoys hearing their kettle shout at them?" He questioned in response, and I couldn't help but giggle, "I'll always listen, Kane. I'd give you the microphone any day and listen. I want to hear about things that make you jump up and down from excitement and how you don't like the texture of one particular thing. I want to know every little thought that goes on inside your head. And I'll listen to it forever. Everything you say is worthwhile, Kane."

And I couldn't help but feel the corner of my mouth twitch, and the pain in my throat come back, and my breathing get all funny for a moment. And maybe, just maybe, for a moment, my bottom lip trembles and my eyes water up for a moment and I get all solemn. But it was better. It wasn't accompanied by any weight on my chest or like something was gripping at my heart. It felt so much more reliving and fresher, like I could breath easier.

"Miles?"

"Yes, Kane?"

I didn't say anything. Words evaded me once more. But I didn't need words to communicate what I wanted. I reach my hand over to the door and I knew for a fact, that the second I got out this car and he got out and I walked over to him, I was going to squeeze the living daylights out of him. And if it means we topple over and are laying on the pavement, then I'm not getting up until it's all out of my system. And, I think the worst part is, I know he wouldn't mind. I can already picture his iconic smile across his face and him laughing wholeheartedly. He'll probably wrap his arms around me, one in my hair and the other on my back rubbing it, all joyously while he does it.

I don't mind him one bit.

[callmethehunter]

Hey everyone!! New Chapter of Robert Fan Fic!! Thanks @firethatgrewsolow for help with edits and for just being so incredibly giving of your time and talent and as always, thanks to @brownskinsugarplum76 for her encouragement to keep at it! This is a continuation of Part I from a few weeks ago. I am pasting the very last paragraph of Part I in italics for a smoother transition. RECAP: So basically, its 1968, the girl had spotted Robert walking towards a group of people at the beach, and was just starting to feel the effects of the acid she had taken earlier. There’s lots of flirting and some sensual moments but the real NSFW is soon to come as Part III. Previously… Ending of Part 1: The same breeze that now caressed her skin also danced among his ringlets . We are all interconnected, she marveled. He brushed the hair away from his forehead, tucking a few golden wisps behind his ear, as his eyes roamed the gathering, coming to rest on hers. A bolt of lightning lit the darkest corners of her mind. Her tanned face flushing, she instinctively dropped her gaze and looked down at her feet, still buried in the sand where the white foamy waves pursued and retreated. She swallowed hard, as she looked up to find him still studying her. And smiling. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Part II Why did his gaze and his smile cause a visceral reaction, speeding up her heartbeat and making it difficult to breathe? Trying to appear nonchalant, she looked up in his general direction, afraid that she would find his eyes lingering, but he was deep in conversation. She looked away again, flustered, only to find his beautiful face imprinted on her brain. Damn, she murmured to herself, get yourself together girl, or this acid trip’s gonna take you off on a wild ride for sure… You want to be the captain of this trip, she thought. With his afterimage still floating on her retinas, she mustered all her courage and tried to stand on legs that felt numb and rubbery. She bent down to grab her sandals, almost lost her balance, turned, and began the trek back to the picnic tables. Through the shadows she tried to calculate how long she would have to walk unobscured and visible to the group. She suddenly felt conspicuous and a little paranoid, as if everyone would stop and stare. But why should I care? She wondered…and answered herself under her breath, singing: “Actin’ funny but I don’t know why, ‘scuse me while I kiss the sky- ta dah da da dar” she air guitared Jimi’s solo with gusto, playing the imaginary Stratocaster left handed, like Jimi. She realized just how absurd she must appear, but that only made her collapse into peals of laughter. The more she tried to stop, the more out of control she became. “Pero que chevere! How groovy is this!” If only she could save this moment of complete abandon and take it out to relive whenever she wanted…wouldn’t that be sweet? For a brief moment, she was literally on all fours, as she tried to resume a respectable upright posture, hoping no one had noticed her momentary insanity….But someone had seen, and it was then she realized that the blonde stranger was emerging from the shadows, taking on shape and substance…the stars flickered on and off, the universe held its breath, time and distance were distorted by the acid so that he bridged the gap between them as if in an instant…She was just getting up when she felt large, strong hands encase her, helping her to stand. She smelled the ocean breeze and the tradewinds in his hair, intermingled with an alluring manly scent; she felt the golden rays of light emanating from his blue eyes. Eyes that were as blue as bluebirds flying over the mountains; blue like the limitless sky above them. Her mouth and face felt numb, her tongue was stuck to the roof of her mouth, barring her speech. “Are you allright?” the tall stranger asked with genuine concern, in an accent that almost caused her absurd giggles to return. She had to bite the tip of her tongue so as to ground herself in the moment and not fly away like a hot air balloon or a feather in the wind. She heard herself, a disembodied voice miles away, replying “Yea, Im fine!” and before she could censor herself, blurted out, “I’m just tripping - Hard. From a purple microdot I did earlier…” she added, with a telltale giggle. “Ahh, I thought as much!” he said in a bright, melodious voice and timbre, as he stifled his own laughter, blue eyes sparkling mischievously like diamonds and sapphires. Holy Shit!, a voice shouted in her brain, This guy is good looking!! And that IS a dimple on his cheek! Her eyes glided over his face and body, surveying his strong chin, the broad shoulders, and toned torso that tapered to a slim waist. Further down, she couldn’t help but notice his bulging crotch - his jeans bursting at the seams in the best way… it was unmistakable, evoking within her a primal longing as old as time; a yearning to feel his body and his hardening manhood pressed against her… “Get a grip,” she admonished herself. Her mind registered all of these impressions in a split second, and the moment was suspended in the stillness of time. When she met his gaze, a lopsided smirk deepened his dimple. Her perusal of his body had not gone unnoticed. In fact, he seemed to be amused by it and amused by her embarrassment at having been caught! She realized they were still hand in hand but that it was she who had sustained the contact far longer than was necessary. Hurriedly, she released her hold, continuing the movement in one fluid motion as she brushed the gritty sand off her cutoffs…God, she was acting like a complete spazz, and the acid wasn’t helping matters one bit. In those moments, it was his turn to survey the landscape of her body, the tanned skin, the swelling of her breasts, her perky nipples that protruded proudly…the small waist and curve of her hips. She would fit right in my hands, he thought, her soft flesh would be the warmth of hearth and home after a long voyage; her full lips like the petals of a velvety rose. He felt a stirring in his loins, the tell tale hardening of his cock beneath the denim. Good God, she was beautiful! He wanted nothing more at that moment than for her to lay down in sweet surrender as her long black wavy hair spilled all around her… Snapping out of his carnal revery, he realized he was standing there like a fool, smirking at this gem of a girl. To fill the charged silence between them, he said. “I’m Robert…and who might you be?” “I’m Maggie,” she replied as she looked up at him. He had to be at least a foot taller, and she found that incredibly attractive. She immediately envisioned him being her shelter against the storms, keeping her safe and warm. “Pleasure to meet you…Maggie.” he savored the taste of her name on his tongue and hoped that by the end of the night he’d be tasting a lot more. “May I ask, where are you from Robert? I detect an accent and I’m sure I haven’t seen you around these parts before… I would remember that,” she said, meeting his steady gaze. Was that the tip of his tongue flicking out and licking his lips?! Lord have mercy, She sensed he was just as attracted to her as she was to him, for his eyes traveled up and down her frame, pausing at certain points of interest. He smiled at her, his tongue back in place, “Of course, darlin’… ask away, I’m an open book!” “Well, then, answer my question, Mr. Open Book… “ she stated as she looked up at him, “or better yet, let me guess!!” she added excitedly. Her exuberance was contagious! “You’re ….Australian, am I right?! “ “Guess again..” he said as he began to walk, not toward the group, but away from it toward the shore. As she joined him, she remained quiet for a second, studying him intently, then suddenly stopped in her tracks and practically shouted, “Wait a minute, I got it! You’re from England?” “Yes, I am actually! Just in Florida for a few gigs. My band is playing at Tugboat Annie’s on Thursday and Friday, before we have to head back to England Saturday afternoon. Would love to see you there if you can make it.” “That depends,” she answered coyly. “Depends on what?” he queried, grinning from ear to ear. “On what happens tonight,” she answered, uncensored once again by the acid, feeling wild and carefree as she took a step closer to him. “And what do you want to happen tonight… pray tell.” She looked into his eyes and answered his question by going up to him and kissing his cheek, right on that irresistible dimple, then she brushed her lips against his and pulled away. He smelled even better up close, and she was filled with desire for him, this perfect stranger who had walked out of the shadows. “I like a girl who knows what she wants,” he replied, encircling her waist with his large hands and reeling her in. “You do?” she replied pushing up against his growing erection. Good God, she was liking this turn of events for sure. “Well, it’s easy for me to know what I want right now” she continued “you’ve got the most amazing, positive vibe. I could tell from the minute I saw you that there was something special about you… something different.” “Oh Yea? That may be the acid talking..although I won’t argue with it” he answered, laughing as he pulled a joint out of his pocket and placed it between his lips, lighting it with his Bic. He inhaled deeply, blew out the smoke and passed it to her as they continued walking down the beach, to a cluster of large rocks that protruded out into the ocean. The locals called this section of the beach “the Jetties.” “So, tell me about yourself, Maggie,” he said to her. “You know where I’m from but I don’t know anything about you…” “Well what do you wanna know?” she replied. “That’s such a broad question.” “For starters, I want to know if that’s a tan or if you were born with such luscious brown skin?” he ventured as he took in the contrast against the white of her top. “Oh, you and your silver tongue,” she rolled her eyes at him but inside she was loving it. “I’m Dominican but I grew up in Puerto Rico…family came over here when I was 10 and we’ve been here ever since” “Really? And do you still speak Spanish?” his eyes expressed genuine interest. She was used to guys playing that game but Robert seemed so authentic. “Actually, I do! My family speaks only Spanish at home.” “So you’re fluent are you?” he exclaimed. “We could have used you last night in Calle Ocho! We almost got ourselves arrested!” he laughed and passed the joint to her which she declined this time. No need pushing her buzz to the max, she needed to be sharp, or at least coherent. They reached the jutting rock formation where the waves incessantly pounded the boulders, spraying salt water everywhere. Droplets came to rest on Robert’s golden curls as well as his arms, and he glistened under the moonlight, his skin almost translucent. In her heightened state, colors seemed more vibrant. “Wanna go up there?” he asked. Mesmerized by the silvery sheen off the moon in his eyes, she nodded absently. “Wait here then, I don’t want you to slip and fall”. As he made his way upwards, she stood on the sand, admiring the view from below. When he had reached the top, he stretched his arm so she could grasp it. She felt his strength as he effortlessly lifted her and set her down beside him. He took her by the hand, leading her to a relatively dry patch. His damp shirt clung to his body and revealed the musculature of his shoulders and back. He’s absolutely beautiful, she thought. She was overwhelmed with the force of his presence as she sat down on the cold hard surface next to him. The smooth rock was not at all welcoming and she looked and felt uncomfortable. He patted his lap, gesturing for her to sit on it, as the joint dangled jauntily from the side of his mouth. What are you getting yourself into?... she thought of Steve, her old man, back at the Bahia Mar, but that wasn’t enough to deter her from the irresistible urge to climb onto Robert’s warm and ample lap. Maggie usually had no trouble striking up a conversation and keeping it going, even with a perfect stranger. With the purple microdot buzzing through her system, she was even more social, more talkative, uninhibited, and carefree. Robert’s sensual and friendly vibe encouraged her natural inclination and she found herself telling him all kinds of things about herself and about having to move from the islands to the United States. He, too, was a great conversationalist, usually interjecting his goofy sense of humor but also listening quietly to her as well. They talked of family, of the U.K,, of his music and his dream to be a singer. As he watched the waves crashing on the rocks around them, he told of his experiences playing the circuit of pubs and bars in the Black Country, where he was from. Recently, his parents had thrown him out of the house, and he was a gypsy, traveling wherever the band was scheduled to play. “That’s too bad about your parents… Does the constant moving from town to town get old after a while?,” Maggie ventured, “There’s a lot to be said about traveling and exploring the world, but to me, there’s no place like home.” “I get it! It’s not that I don’t want to be settled, it’s that I don’t have any interest whatsoever in becoming an accountant and doing people’s taxes for the rest of my life” he groaned. “life’s too short and I’ve got to feel passion about what I’m doing, I’ve got to get off on it, y’know?” he looked up at the silvery moon and stars, gesturing dramatically with his hands he added “Music’s where it’s at for me, Maggie, I live for that…and moments like this when I meet someone I truly click with. It’s cosmic energy at work!” “ Oh my God! “, Maggie exclaimed, “I believe in cosmic energy too! The idea that we are interconnected, that there is something mystical at work in our lives. Like tonight, we are aligned with it!! Can’t you feel it?” “Yes, I can feel it too. But I need more” he answered, leaning in for a kiss which she gave back somewhat distractedly. Her hyperactive mind was full of thoughts, impressions, and random ideas, one of which was the need to hear him sing. “Will you sing me one of your songs…please?” she asked him, in between playful kisses, eager to ascertain for herself if he had talent. He shook his head, his curls bouncing to and fro, and told her she would have to wait till he played Madison Square Garden. She playfully punched him in the arm, saying, “Mean man, I want to hear you sing to me.” Something about the way she looked at him and pouted erased all trepidation and suddenly, in almost a whisper, his voice dropped an octave and he began to sing the blues. It was from a song he and his band recorded just prior to coming to Florida. “I’ve been all around the world, Lord I gotta find my baby ; Yes, I’m going all around the world Yea, I gotta find baby Please mama Please, have you seen my sweet baby ; Oh I’m gonna lose my mind oooh, if I don’t find my baby” She knew she was done for. His voice was …she could not put words to it… his voice did things to her. How he climbed octaves effortlessly, sang with such feeling and passion. He was simply irresistible. Steve was but a distant memory as she adjusted her body to be closer to him, purposely grinding her ass closer to his obviously growing erection. Suddenly a wave pounded on the rocks below, drenching them in an instant and interrupting their moment. They yelped in unison, jumped up and quickly but carefully made their way off the slippery rocks onto the sandy beach below. Dripping wet, they scampered toward the boardwalk, slowing as they spotted a lifeguard tower not too far ahead. They both looked at each other. “Robert! Let’s go there. We can sit on the ramp while we dry off, and you can serenade me.” she teased him as she led him by the hand in the direction of the tower… To be continued with NSFW :D