Celebrate The End Of Things With Cheap Champagne
Pairing: Frank Iero x Reader
Genre: Angst
Summary: @sirloin-steaks requested a Frank story based on the song “New Year’s Day” by Taylor Swift.
It’s December 31st, 2006, and My Chemical Romance are ringing in the New Year, performing live in Times Square. Frank invites you to come out, and see the show. But, an after-party at the band’s hotel, takes a turn, that nobody saw coming.
Trigger warning for substance abuse.
You stood on the deck of the ferry boat, watching the bright lights of New York City draw closer and closer. You used to take this ferry every day, from your hometown in New Jersey, to your job in Manhattan. But, that seemed like so long ago now.
Once upon a time, your friend and former coworker, Gerard, would catch the morning ferry with you. But, after the September 11th attacks, he’d quit his job at your company, and started a band. His decision had puzzled you at first. But, the first time you saw My Chemical Romance perform live, you had understood.
That was also the night that you met Frank. His guitar playing was electric, and you told him as much, after the band finished their set. It had been at some shitty dive bar - the only venues that would take them at the time. But, he’d told you that night, that he, and Gee, and the guys, were going to make it to the big time. You’d admired his ambition, and the two of you became fast friends. And he’d been right.
Now, four years later, My Chemical Romance was one of the biggest bands in the country. Their album, The Black Parade, had just dropped two months ago, debuting at #2 on the Billboard charts. They had gotten popular enough, to receive a prestigious offer. Ryan Seacrest had asked them to play New Year’s Rockin’ Eve, tonight, in Times Square!
Millions of Americans tuned in every New Year’s Eve, to see the concert broadcast, and watch the ball drop at midnight. It was crazy to you, that your dorky friends from back home in New Jersey, had gotten “big” enough to perform alongside glitzy pop stars, like Christina Aguilera.
You were so psyched for them. It would also be the first time you had seen them in a while. Frank was the only one of the guys who still technically lived in New Jersey. When he was home, and off the road, he would come over to your house all the time, to watch movies, or play video games, just like in the old days. But, the last time that had happened, had been months ago. He, and the rest of the band, had been traveling around nonstop, doing radio and TV interviews, to promote the new album. In February, they were supposed to embark on a world tour.
“But after tonight’s show, we’ll have a little bit of time off, before the tour starts,” Frank had told you excitedly on the phone, yesterday afternoon, when he’d invited you to the gig. “I really hope we get to spend more time together, Y/N. I missed you.”
You had missed him, too - more than words could describe. Your heart ached whenever you drove past his house, knowing that he wasn’t in it. You had things you wanted to say to him tonight - things you’d been waiting to tell him for a long time.
Your heart hammered as you stepped off the ferry, and began walking towards Time Square. The streets were packed with people, all rushing towards the same place you were. You knew some New Yorkers had started camping out at three o’clock in the afternoon, to get the best seats. If Frank hadn’t sent you a VIP pass in the mail, you’d surely have ended up in the way back of the crowd, nowhere close to the stage.
You showed your pass to the security personnel, who were looking through peoples’ bags at a checkpoint, near the entrance to the Square. They waved you through to a special designated area, in the front row, for friends and family of the performers. You were pretty sure the kid on your left was the fourth Jonas Brother. You felt remarkably out of place.
But, then your phone beeped, alerting you that you had a text. A smile crossed your face, when you realized it was from Frank.
We r about 2 head onstage, he said. I will see you after our set, I promise! There’s nobody I’d rather ring in 2007 with :)
You heard the crowd start screaming, and your head whipped around, as you watched the announcer stroll onto the stage.
“Please welcome our next musical guest - My! Chemical! Romaaaaance!”
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
Their performance was amazing. They were one of a dozen artists performing tonight, so they only got to do three songs, before they had to get offstage and make room for the next act (Gwen Stefani, apparently). But, they put their whole hearts into those three tracks. Frank was jumping around like a maniac with his guitar, despite the freezing cold. Ray even had a pair of “2007” sunglasses on.
You screamed for them, like every other girl in the crowd. At this point, you thought with a frown, there’s probably ten thousand people, with a crush on the same man, that I’ve been pining for since 2002.
...Then again, you considered, the ten thousand other girls, don’t have backstage passes.
Your frown disappeared, when you walked backstage, and a pair of arms immediately circled you.
“Y/N!” Frank grinned. “Thank you so much for coming out and seeing us tonight!”
“Wouldn’t have missed it for the world,” you grinned, hugging your friend back. “You were amazing.”
“Thank you,” Frank said sincerely, releasing you from his grip. “Are you ready to get out of this cold?”
“Where are we going?” you asked.
“Back to the hotel,” he explained. “Ray’s not feeling so good.”
“Oh, no,” you frowned. “I’m sorry to hear that.”
“Hi, Y/N!” Ray greeted, waving at you with one hand, while he pulled a tissue from his pocket, with the other. He blew his nose loudly. “....Sorry,” he muttered. “How are you?”
“It’s okay!” you assured him. “I’m fine...I’m sorry you’re not doing so well, though. You sound awful.”
“It’s this East Coast weather,” he shrugged, throwing the tissue in a nearby wastebasket. “I hate doing outdoor shows, in the wintertime.”
“You sounded great onstage,” you reassured him. “Nobody could even tell you were sick.”
“The dorky sunglasses conceal how puffy his eyes are,” Frank confessed. “Poor guy didn’t sleep at all last night.”
“Well, hopefully, I’ll sleep better tonight,” Ray chucked. “We’ve got two rooms at the Knickerbocker Hotel - one for me and Mikey, and one for Frank and Gerard.”
“Speaking of which,” you asked, “where is Gerard?”
“Here I am!” chuckled a voice behind you, and you turned and saw your old friend Gerard, beaming at you. “Sorry, I was busy calling our cab. It’s so good to see you, Y/N! Thank you for coming.”
“Thank you for inviting me!” you smiled back. “I’m really proud of you guys, getting to be part of such a major event.”
“Oh, it’s surreal,” Gerard confessed. “I used to come up here with my mom and dad, and Mikey, every New Year’s Eve, to watch the show live. I never thought I’d be in the show.”
“We’re really lucky,” Mikey smiled, appearing beside Gerard, with a glass of champagne in his hand.
“Ooh, where’d you get that?” Frank asked.
“They’re giving them out to all the VIPs,” Mikey explained. “Would you like one, Y/N?”
“I don’t think I qualify as a Very Important Person,” you confessed.
“Nonsense,” Frank shook his head. “You’re very important to me.”
“Yeah,” Mikey nodded. “You’ve been good friends with all of us for a long time. You can have whatever you want.”
“No time for that,” Gerard shook his head. “Our cab’s here.”
“C’mon,” Frank said, lacing his fingers with yours. “We have to go out through a secret exit, so that the fans don’t mob us.”
“Oh, shit, really?” you chuckled. “I feel like a secret agent.”
“Our lives have gotten so weird, honestly,” Gerard confessed. “I’m kinda glad that we’re gonna put some distance, between us and these crowds.”
“Yeah, it’ll just be five of us, once we get to the hotel,” Mikey nodded. “Well...four. Ray is gonna go to sleep in our room, as soon we get there. But, the rest of us can party in Frankie and Gee’s room til midnight.”
“Or later,” Frank grinned mischievously.
You smiled at your four oldest friends. “I can’t wait.”
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
“Ok, question,” you asked uncertainly, staring at the yellow cab in front of you. “How are we gonna fit five people in there?”
“It’s gonna be a tight squeeze,” Frank chuckled.
“Well, hey, we’ve managed to fit in smaller places before, right?” Gerard pointed out.
“True,” Ray laughed. “Remember when we were traveling around New Jersey, in our shitty little van?”
“We were all practically right on top of each other,” Mikey recalled.
When the band had first started, you had gone with them, on weekend trips, to play a gig, in the next town over. You’d squished between the boys, somehow, and helped them carry their equipment into the venue. Watching them rock the faces off the local kids, had been so much fun.
But, as time went on, they started getting offers to play at clubs across state lines. Day trips turned into months-long tours. You couldn’t commit to that - unlike Gerard, you still had a day job. And so, you started seeing the guys less and less. Then they’d gotten a record deal - and everything had gotten even more complicated.
“That was….a long time ago,” you frowned.
“Yeah,” Frank said wistfully. “I wish we had the chance to do that again.”
“Well, now, most of the time, we don’t have to squish,” Ray pointed out. “We have a nice, roomy tour bus, with bunks and everything.”
“You’ve come a long way,” you smiled weakly.
You were quiet as you piled into the car. As the taxi started driving down the street, you stared out at the night sky, and the city lights flying by. Suddenly, Frank gently touched your hand, making you turn, and face him.
“Hey,” he said quietly, giving your hand a squeeze, “are you alright, Y/N?”
“Yeah,” you shrugged. “I’m fine. Don’t worry.”
“Tonight’s supposed to be a party, remember?” he teased. “So, try and smile for me, okay?”
“I’ll try,” you promised. It was far easier to smile, with him around.
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
You could tell as soon as you walked into the lobby, that this was a five star hotel. A crystal chandelier, cast a soft glow over the pristine decor.
“We already got our room keys earlier,” Gerard explained. “So, we can go ahead up.”
You nodded, and followed him and the guys to the elevator.
“I think I’m gonna crash as soon as we get upstairs,” Ray confessed, sniffling into his tissue again.
“I don’t blame you,” you said sympathetically. The elevator dinged, as you arrived at your floor.
“Since I won’t see you guys until tomorrow,” Ray sighed, “Happy New Year, alright?”
“Happy New Year, Ray,” you waved, as you watched him unlock his hotel room door, and head inside. “Feel better soon!”
“Thanks, Y/N,” Ray wheezed, closing the door behind him.
“Alright, let’s head into our room,” Frank grinned, opening the door to the adjoining room. “What do you want to do first?”
“Let’s turn the TV on,” Mikey suggested, immediately looking for the remote. “I wanna see the other performances. They’re still broadcasting live right now.”
“Oh, true,” you nodded. “We can still watch the ball drop tonight, on this flat screen!”
“I wanna look at the room service menu,” Gerard grinned. “Y/N, you can have anything you want. Just let me know.”
“Thanks, Gee,” you grinned. “Should we get champagne to toast with, at midnight?”
“I’ll get it for you three,” Gerard shrugged. “For me? I guess I’ll order a club soda. If they put it in a fancy glass, I can still clink it with yours when the clock strikes twelve.”
“Yeah, that works,” Frank agreed. “Looks almost the same.”
You frowned. That’s right, you remembered. Gerard is about two and a half years sober now.
You remembered going to see them, at their Englishtown show, during Warped Tour ‘04. Gerard had been a mess. You hadn’t seen him in two or three months, and you were shocked how much he’d deteriorated. You’d felt helpless. If you’d had more time, maybe you could have talked some sense into him. But, the very next day, he had to get back on his bus, and head to another gig, in Pennsylvania.
Frank had called you on the phone, maybe a week later, and told you Gerard had decided to get clean, on his own. You didn’t know how, or why. You didn’t know fifty percent, of what went on in your friends’ heads anymore.
“.....Y/N?” Frank called, his voice stunning you out of your thoughts.
“Sorry,” you blinked. “Did you say something?”
“Yeah, I said I’m going out to the balcony, to have a smoke,” Frank replied. “I asked you if you wanted to come with me?”
“Oh….yeah, sure,” you nodded, and followed him out. “Got a light?”
“Here,” Frank said, pulling a lighter out of his pocket, and handing it to you.
You took a pack of Marlboros out of your purse, and lit one. “Thanks,” you said, handing it back.
Frank lit his own cigarette, and took a drag. You glanced over at him as you inhaled the nicotine, watching how the cool night breeze tousled his hair.
“I thought you said on the phone, that you were trying to quit,” Frank raised an eyebrow.
“I should,” you sighed, exhaling smoke. “I know it’s bad for me.”
“Sorry for being a bad influence,” Frank laughed. “I know I got no room to talk.”
“It’s not your fault,” you shrugged, taking another puff. “I guess I’m just stressed tonight.”
“About what?” Frank asked, looking at you curiously.
“It’s stupid,” you mumbled.
“Tell me,” Frank insisted, taking his free hand in yours again. Your heart raced at his casual touch.
“I just…,” you sighed, unsure how to begin. “I never see you guys anymore.”
“I’m sorry,” Frank frowned.
“No, don’t be,” you shook your head. “I’m being selfish. I should be happy for you, right? It’s a good thing, that the band has gotten so successful, that you have fans in practically every city in the world, that want to see you.”
“Yeah, they get to see me,” Frank groaned. “But, I don’t get to see my friends, or family - any of the people I love most - for months at a time.”
The people he loves most. Your face reddened. Did you really fit into that category?
“After tonight,” you asked, “how long will you be in town?”
“The first night of the tour is February 22nd,” Frank explained. “The gig’s in New Hampshire, so we’ll be flying out the night before.”
“So we have….slightly less than two months, to spend time together,” you calculated. “And after that, the next time you’ll be in my neck of the woods is…?”
“Bamboozle Festival,” Frank replied. “That’s in May.”
“Wow,” you frowned. “Are you playing all three days of the festival, or…?”
“Nah, just one,” Frank said sheepishly. “We’ll be in Jersey for a night….the very next day, we’ll be playing a gig in fuckin’ Maine.”
“The fun never stops, I guess,” you deadpanned.
“I mean, it is fun,” Frank admitted. “I love being a musician. Playing my guitar, onstage, is all I’ve wanted to do, my entire life.”
“Yeah, it’s your dream,” you said quickly, “that’s why I should just shut up, and let you…”
“You don’t have to shut up,” Frank interrupted. “Y/N, I want you to tell me how you feel.”
“How do I feel, Frank?” you repeated, your emotions starting to get the best of you. “I feel like I don’t even know my friends at all anymore! I don’t want you to turn into a stranger, whose laugh I could recognize anywhere. I’m still working the same dead end job I had the day I met you….but your life has completely changed. You’re gone 80% of the year, and yeah, I know you text or call me whenever you can, but when I’m not there face to face, I still miss so much of your life! You used to be just….a guy next door, that I could listen to records and smoke with. Now you’re some….millionaire rock star. That coat you’ve got on right now is probably worth more than my first car, and you’ve probably got girls in every town, throwing their panties at you…”
“Yeah, but I wouldn’t look twice at any of those girls,” Frank said, looking you in the eye, “if a certain someone, told me, that she wanted me to be hers, and hers alone.”
A certain someone….? you gasped. Did he mean…?
“Hey!” a voice interrupted, and you jumped, as the sliding glass door slid open, and Gerard stepped onto the balcony. “There you guys are!”
“H-hey,” you stammered, taken aback.
“Everything alright?” Gerard asked, raising a quizzical eyebrow.
“Yeah, yeah, everything’s cool,” Frank mumbled, not looking at you at all, as he stubbed his cigarette out in the ashtray. “What did you need?”
“We’ve got about five minutes til midnight,” Gerard smiled. “Figured you guys would want to come back inside, so we can count down the last seconds of 2006 together.”
“Oh, right, of course,” you blinked. “Did room service already bring up the champagne flutes?”
“Yeah, they’re ready to go,” Gerard nodded. “....Wait. Where’s Mikey?”
“We thought he was with you,” Frank said, looking confused.
“No,” Gerard shook his head. “I went to the bathroom, and when I came back out, he was gone. If he’s not on the balcony with you guys, where did he go?”
“I don’t know,” you shrugged. “Maybe he went to his and Ray’s room?”
“Oh, yeah, that would make sense,” Gerard nodded. “Let’s go get him.”
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
Gerard knocked loudly on the hotel room door.
“Come on, Mikey!” he called. “We got three minutes til midnight, you’re gonna miss the ball drop, dude!”
The door swung open, but instead of Mikey, a sleepy-looking Ray answered.
“Mikey’s not in here,” Ray said with a yawn. “It’s just me.”
“Oh, sorry for waking you up, man,” Gerard apologized.
“Wait,” Frank realized. “If he’s not in either hotel room, then, where is he?”
“Maybe he went to go get ice?” Ray suggested.
“Or maybe he went downstairs, to ask the front desk guy something,” you guessed.
“Let’s split up,” Frank suggested. “You guys go down the hall and see if he’s by the ice machine. Y/N and I will look for him downstairs.”
“Yeah, we can do that,” Gerard agreed. “Hopefully we’ll find him before the end of the year!”
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
“This elevator’s taking too long to get up here,” Frank said impatiently, hitting the down-arrow button a second time.
“Wanna just take the stairs?” you suggested.
“Works for me,” Frank shrugged.
You followed him into the stairwell, your heart still pounding from the conversation on the balcony. What would have happened, you wondered, if Gerard hadn’t walked in when he did?
Frank kept his eyes on the flight of stairs in front of you, not saying a word, as you walked past the sign, indicating that you were now on the second floor.
“Maybe he didn’t go this wa...oh, fuck,” Frank gasped, coming to a sudden stop.
Your blood froze, when you saw what he was looking at. Mikey’s unconscious body, lay sprawled across the bottom steps. He was face down….he didn’t even look like he was breathing.
“Mikey, oh my god!” You ran to his side, flipping him over, so that you could see his face. “Frank, we have to help him!”
The bassist looked deathly pale, and his lips had turned a horrifying shade of blue. You felt for a pulse. It was there, but it was disturbingly weak.
“Come on, Mikey, wake up!” you pleaded, shaking his shoulders. “Oh my god, what’s wrong with him?!”
“I think he’s overdosing,” Frank realized, kneeling by your side.
“On what?!” you gasped.
“On whatever he went downstairs, to pick up from his dealer,” Frank growled. “Goddamnit! We need to call 911.”
“Mikey!” a familiar voice called, and Gerard and Ray burst into the stairwell.
“Oh, god!” Gerard gasped, when he saw his brother, lying eerily still in your arms.
“I’m trying to wake him up!” you explained. “It’s not working...fuck, what do I do?”
“He needs a doctor,” Ray realized, whipping out his cell phone. “....Hello? Yes, we’re having an emergency…...the Knickerbocker Hotel….umm, Six Times Square….please hurry….my friend isn’t breathing…”
You shook Mikey’s shoulders again. His eyes fluttered open, but his pupils were like pinpricks. He gasped and choked, like he couldn’t get air into his lungs.
“Come on, Mikey, hang in there!” you begged. Oh god, what if he died?!
You could see the headlines now. World Tour Canceled After Bassist’s Hospitalization. You’d wanted more time with Frank….but not like this, damnit!
Since when did your oldest friend’s kid brother do smack?!
I really don’t know anything about them anymore, you realized, tears clouding your vision as you listened to him wheeze. Minutes felt like hours.
“Out of the way!” called an unfamiliar voice, and you gaped as two paramedics dragged a stretcher down the stairs.
“Ma’am, we need to move him,” a uniformed woman barked. “Time is of the essence.”
You let the EMT scoop Mikey up, and load him onto the gurney.
“What did he take?” the second paramedic asked.
“I….I don’t know,” you stammered. “We just found him like this.”
“Ma’am,” the man pressed, “we’re not here to judge anybody. But, any information you have, can help us figure out what antidote he needs…”
“Here,” Frank said. “I found this next to his body.”
He handed the paramedic a needle. Oh, god.
“I see,” the paramedic nodded grimly. “Judith! Get this man two milligrams of naloxone, stat!”
“Is….is he gonna be okay?!” Gerard gasped, tears in his eyes. “That’s my baby brother….”
“We’re going to try our best to save him, sir,” the female paramedic (Judith) promised. “We need to move him to the hospital, as soon as possible.”
“We’re only going to be able to fit two extra people in the ambulance,” the male paramedic warned. “Who’s going?”
“Me,” Gerard said immediately. “He’s my family!”
“Who else?” the paramedic demanded. “We don’t have time to waste.”
Mikey gasped for air on the gurney, his face growing bluer by the minute.
“I’ll go,” Ray decided. “Frank, you stay here with Y/N, okay?”
“O-okay,” Frank stammered. You clung to him,shaking, as you watched the paramedics drag your friend out of the hallway, to the ambulance waiting outside.
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
“.....Happy New Year!” the oblivious voice of Ryan Seacrest rang out from the television screen, as you walked back into the hotel room, wiping your eyes on your sleeve.
Confetti was falling in Times Square, as the credits rolled. You’d missed the countdown. There had been no toast, no midnight kiss (although perhaps, the latter had been foolish to even hope for.)
“This wasn’t how 2007 was supposed to start,” Frank sobbed, sinking down onto the bed. “Fuck!”
“H-he’s gonna be okay,” you stammered. “The doctors are gonna save his life…”
“You don’t know that!” Frank cried, kicking a bottle of Dom Perignon off the coffee table. It shattered, sending broken glass and alcohol all over the floor.
“Fuck, I’m sorry, Y/N,” Frank apologized, kneeling to pick up the shards. “I shouldn’t have done that…”
“Ssh, stop, you’re gonna cut yourself,” you warned, grabbing his hands. “We can clean that up later, okay? I understand that you’re only lashing out, because you’re scared…”
“Of course I’m scared,” Frank wept, burying his head in your shoulder. “That’s one of my best friends.”
“He’s my friend, too,” you said softly, stroking Frank’s hair. “I’m scared, too, but there’s nothing we can do now, but pray.”
You sat down on the bed, and Frank sat with you, still sobbing into your shirt. You were choking back tears yourself.
“I….I didn’t know he was doing that stuff,” you said guiltily. “I’m never around you guys anymore….I….”
“I didn’t realize the extent of the problem, either,” Frank confessed. “And I’m with the kid almost every day. I should’ve noticed, but I was too self absorbed, doing my own dumb shit…”
“Ssh, it’s not your fault, Frankie,” you soothed. “We got him, to the people that can help him. That’s all we can do.”
“It doesn’t feel like enough,” Frank sniffed, still clinging to you tightly.
“No,” you agreed, your heart aching, “it doesn’t.”
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
You woke the next morning, to the feeling of warmth against your side. Your eyes fluttered open, and you realized that Frank was sleeping next to you. What?!
Your cheeks reddened as you stared at his sleeping face, so close to your own. “...Frank? Why are you…?”
Reality filtered back into your head, slowly, as you recalled the events of the previous night. Oh god….Mikey!
Was he okay? You still didn’t know. You and Frank had sat beside each other on the hotel room bed, crying, clinging to each other for comfort. You supposed you had fallen asleep like that.
“.....Huh?” Frank groaned sleepily. “Y/N…?”
He shot up, jerking away from you, almost as soon as he realized, that your bodies were touching. “I...I’m sorry!”
“N-no, it’s fine…” you stammered.
“Fuck….I need to check my messages,” Frank realized, groping for his cell phone on the bedside table. He sat up,and put his feet on the floor. “Owww!”
“What’s wrong?” you gasped.
“I just stepped on a shard of the bottle I broke last night...fuck!” Frank swore.
“Oh no,” you winced. “Is it bleeding?”
“No, it’s just cut a little,” Frank shook his head.
“Do you want me to call the front desk,” you offered, “and see if they can bring up some Band-Aids?”
“No, it’s not that serious,” Frank insisted, opening his flip phone. His eyes widened, as he clicked through his inbox. “Oh….oh, thank god…”
“What?” you demanded.
“Ray texted me, around like two in the morning,” Frank explained. “He said Mikey’s gonna make it. The doctors were able to reverse the overdose in time, and he’s gonna make a full recovery.”
“Oh, thank goodness!” you cried, tearing up from sheer relief. You had been so scared, that Ray’s text, would say that Mikey hadn’t survived. He’s gonna be okay. He’s alive.
Frank, however, didn’t share your grateful smile.
“What’s wrong?” you asked.
“I’m sorry that you had to see that, last night,” Frank frowned. “We ruined your New Year’s Eve.”
“It’s not your fault,” you shook your head. “I’m glad I was there, to help you find him. I wouldn’t have wanted you to go through this alone.”
“I hate to ask you for even more help,” Frank grimaced, “but, we need to clean this shit up.”
“You’re right,” you nodded, leaning down to help him pick up the glass shards. “It wouldn’t be fair, to leave it for the hotel staff to pick up.”
“Some bands dig trashing hotel rooms,” Frank sighed, grabbing a towel from the bathroom, to mop up the puddle of champagne. “Not me, though. I feel bad, making a mess, that some housekeeper is gonna have to deal with.”
He’s a kind person, you thought to yourself, as you carefully placed the pieces of bottle into a waste basket. Not everyone would take the time to do this, after the night we had.
“Shit, look at this,” Frank sighed, pointing down at the hardwood floor. “Nobody blew out the stupid scented candle, that Housekeeping lit before we checked in, to make the place smell pretty. Now, there’s dried wax all over the floorboards.”
“You had bigger things to worry about last night,” you reminded. “I’m sorry, I didn’t even notice the candle was still burning, with everything else going on. I would’ve reminded you to put it out.”
“That’s not your job,” Frank said, pulling a guitar pick from his pocket. He tried to use it to scrape some of the wax up, but it didn’t seem to want to budge. “None of this is your job.”
“What do you mean?” you blinked.
“You said last night, that you don’t see us for months at a time,” Frank reasoned, scraping harder with his pick. “And then...last night, you finally see us again, and this happens.”
“You couldn’t have predicted something like that,” you assured him.
“We complicate your life, Y/N,” Frank frowned. “I complicate your life. You don’t need this fucking drama. The best thing I could for you, is probably just leave you alone. Stop inviting you to see us when we’re in town. I’ve grown apart from a lot of friends since I left New Jersey. Why can’t I just let this relationship go, too?”
“I don’t want you to do that!” you protested. “Frank, our friendship is really important to me. I would be miserable if you suddenly stopped inviting me to hang out.”
“I don’t just want to hang out with you,” Frank mumbled. “I want more than that.”
“....Huh?” you cocked your head.
“But it’s not fair, for me to ask you for that,” Frank signed. “Not when I know damn well, that I’m about to spend the majority of 2007, hundreds of miles away from you.”
“Ask me for what?” you demanded. You suddenly remembered the words, he had spoken to you on the balcony, before your night had gone straight to hell.
“I wouldn’t look twice, at any of those girls, if a certain someone, told me, that she wanted me to be hers, and hers alone.”
“Nothing,” Frank murmured, picking fruitlessly at the wax on the floor again. “It’s stupid. Ignore me.”
“I won’t ignore it,” you insisted. “Frank, what were you going to ask me?”
Frank looked at his shoes.
You sat down on the floor next to him, putting a gentle hand on his shoulder. “....Frank?”
“I was going to ask you...to be mine,” Frank confessed.
You gasped, audibly. No way….he really felt the same way about you, that you did about him?!
“But, it’s not right, for me to ask you, to make that commitment to me!” Frank said miserably. “Not when I’m just gonna disappear on you again. And...you saw, last night, what my life has turned into. What my band has turned into. I’m a mess….why would you want to be with someone like me?”
“Frankie, I love you,” you said plainly. Now that you knew he returned your feelings, there was no point in hiding it anymore. “I’ve loved you for years.”
He raised his head to look at you. His hazel eyes, swimming with tears again, stared into yours. “You….you mean that?”
“Yes,” you said emotionally. “I’ve been in love with you for so long….but, you’re a famous rock star now. I’m still just an art school dropout. You can do so much better than me.”
“Funny,” Frank chuckled bitterly, “I was about to say the same thing, about you.”
“Frank, there isn’t anybody better than you,” you sighed, and grabbed him by the collar, pulling him into a searing kiss.
His lips met yours, hesitant at first, but then suddenly you were toppling to the floor, as he pressed himself against you, with four years worth of buried desire.
Life was so short. You realized that now.
His hands tangled into your hair as he kissed you over and over. “Be mine,” he gasped, coming up for air. “Please be mine, Y/N….even if it fucks up everything…”
“Frankie, it’s okay,” you assured him, as you gazed up at him tenderly. “I don’t care if you’re gone a hundred nights. You’re worth waiting for. Just promise me, that when you do finally come home, I can….have you.”
“Oh, you can have me any way you want me,” Frank breathed, leaning down to kiss you passionately again. “I won’t touch anyone else while I’m away on tour….nobody else is as beautiful as you. You’re the only one that I want.”
“You’re the only one that I want, too, Frankie,” you promised him, claiming his mouth once again. “I want you every day. Not just when you’re the toast of the town. Not just when times are good. I want to be there with you, through the bad times, too. I want to help you when you’re scared, or even when something fucked up happens, like last night... because I love you. I’ll stay with you, no matter what….even when it’s hard, or it’s wrong, or you’re making mistakes. I don’t care. I just want to be with you.”
“I want to be with you, too, Y/N,” Frank vowed, kissing your eyes, your nose, your mouth. It was like he couldn’t get enough. “You’re the woman I choose….because, hey, there might be lots of women who’d love to be my New Year’s Eve kiss. But, you’re the only woman I know, who would stick by my side, helping me clean up bottles on New Year’s Day.”
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[Trans] FTISLAND - The last tour before enlistment! During the final, Hongki announces “As 4, we will protect FTISLAND.”
During this final performance, on this day, in this venue, it was certain that everyone thought, “even with only 4 people, this is FTISLAND.”
The Korean rock band FTISLAND held the finale of its ‘FTISLAND JAPAN LIVE TOUR 2019 FIVE TREASURES’ tour at Hyogo World Memorial Hall on May 5th. Although already announced, this tour was their last before enlistment. Starting from Tokyo’s Toyoso PIT on April 4th, there were 13 performances during their 1-month long tour. From live houses to halls, to Budokan and finishing in an arena.
Before the show started, the fans in the fully sold-out audience naturally clapped along to ‘God Bless You,’ the lead track from their 9th Album ‘Everlasting’ (released on March 27), as they waited impatiently for FTISLAND to make their entrance. To mark the entrance of the members, the SE (Sound Effect) comprised of an edited and rearranged version of ‘FT Island’ from their 1st Korean album ‘Cheerful Sensibility’ (2007).
They announced, “since we can’t do a live next year to celebrate our Japanese Major Debut’s 10th anniversary, this tour will reflect our history, from our indie days to now.”
In line with this, the song ‘FT Island” was a concert staple during their indie days. As the clapping of the fans grew louder to this SE, Minhwan (Dr), Seunghyun (Gt) and Jaejin (Ba) entered. Then, as Minhwan started to drum a tight beat, Hongki (Vo) entered and they surged triumphantly into their major debut song, ‘Flower Rock’. Despite being a fast-paced song, Hongki was impressively able to stitch together a few words. Fans jumped vigorously with Hongki, and there was a sense of unity from the start.
During the section with FTISLAND’s anime and drama compositions, the lyrics to Satisfaction ‘I’ve been searching for the meaning of happiness. I wondered where it was’ were changed to ‘I wondered if it (the meaning of happiness) was in Kobe.’ Hearing the fans sing this loudly, Hongki grinned broadly. During ‘Haruka’, the theme song for a Japanese drama in which Hongki starred, Seunghyun demonstrated his rapping skills for the first time in a while.
As Hongki commanded the crowd to ‘Give me your voice!’, the ‘WOWOWO’ sing-along to ‘Aqua’ was born. Hongki opened his arms wide as if preparing to receive their voices. Then, he added his own voice thunderously to the fans’ singing. During the one Korean composition section, Hongki, Jaejin and Seunghyun head-banged to the heavy rock beats. To the fans riding the momentum of the music, Hongki sang back to them, returning the favour with his voice. During the sing-along hook of ‘Pray’, as the title suggests, Hongki clasped his hands at his chest as if in prayer. Hongki and the fan’s voices became entangled with each other in a whirlpool. As the song finished and the applause sounded, it felt as though they (the fans and FTISLAND) understood each other through the music. In FTISLAND’s lives, the rapport between the stage and the audience during this sort of stage is huge.
After the intense music, they continued on to a ‘cooling down’ acoustic set. Minhwan said, “We were worried about how we should let you hear the music from our indies era.
Seunghyun added, “so the songs we’ll play have been put into ‘blocks’ divided by season. In Japan, it goes spring, rainy season, then summer. However in Korea, the rainy season comes after summer. Without knowing this, we created the order according to Korea.”
To the backing of Seunghyun’s acoustic guitar, Jaejin started singing ‘Soyogi’, the ballad which conjures images of spring. Then, the bass was layered on top, and the vocal baton was passed to Seunghyun. During the hook of the song, Hongki’s vocals and Minhwan’s cajón overlapped, resounding in a beautiful harmony.
The mutual voices of Hongki and the fans in the venue took hold for the summery ‘Brand new Days’. Although it had been performed in this style since the first day at Toyosu PIT, the timing was changed from the original, and fans struggled to align with the new arrangement. However, fans finally succeeded during the final, and in response Hongki’s entire face lit up, and he gave the audience a thumbs up.
‘Raining’, the song coloured with the rainy season, started with Minhwan’s vocals and the fan’s voices layered upon each other. As the fans sang the chorus, Hongki would provide the harmony. He praised the fans, saying “I love hearing you sing. If I compare it to the first day, you’ve gradually gotten better.”
However, it wasn’t just FTISLAND’s main vocal Hongki singing, Jaejin, Seunghyun and Minhwan all took turns at the vocals. It was the addition of the fans’ vocals, creating perfect unity, which made this song so attractive. Sometimes intense, sometimes gentle, FTISLAND do not only push with power, but have also built up songs with varied expressions. Especially during this tour, there were many such scenes. The face of Hongki, who watched the fans singing along with gentle eyes, also created a lasting impression.
“The atmosphere has become sad with only ballads, so we’ll raise your spirits with our favourite songs now,” said Hongki as ‘Hold the Moon’ started. When it was time for ‘Golden’, a song which Hongki professed he loved, he put his foot on the step and yelled ‘C’mon’. Gathering his voice, the excitement in the audience was roused.
The last section started with ‘Freedom’. Hongki descended from the stage and sprayed the audience with a water gun. After Seunghyun’s scream, Seunghyun and Jaejin both went from left to right, moving around all over the stage. At Hongki’s command of ‘sit down!’, the audience all sat in their seats at once. Then, at the height of the song, they all stood and shook their towels.
Continuing the excitement, next was the FT-style party tune ‘Puppy’. It was enjoyable experiencing the duet between the fans and FT, and there was also great unity enveloping the room for ‘Mitaiken Future’. With Minhwan’s drums gaining momentum, they brought their story to a close with their latest song ‘God Bless You.’ Its powerful sound enveloped the hall right until the end.
The encore opened with the magnificent ballad ‘Paradise’. On Hongki’s lead, Jaejin and Seunghyun sang solo, and then he pointed to the male fans in the audience and said, “just you (sing)!” Afterward, he said “Everyone!” and the whole hall sang as one.
“The next song is the last song of the tour. Everyone, you’ve worked hard,” Hongki said, while hanging his head low, “It’s been a long tour. We were ok with performing in small venues, because we said we just wanted to perform throughout Japan. To be the only Korean band to have been able to perform in so many different places, we held that sort of pride too.”
“Oh!” he shouted excitedly.
“Soon, we’ll have to head off, but we still have the Hiroshima live in August (replacement live), and my solo fan-meeting in July. We want to hold concerts until the very last moment before we leave. Even if it’s a sudden, surprise announcement, will you come play with us?” he asked the audience.
“This concert held a lot of meaning for us. We wanted to say ‘bye bye’ with smiles on our faces, however instead we made you worry. We will protect FTISLAND as 4. Even when we return (from enlistment), we will continue to be a band, so I ask that you please give us your continued support,” he said, which was met with long applause.
“We still have many things we want to show you, music we want to do, things we want to do. So we want to hold concerts until you all get sick of it,” he conveyed passionately to the fans.
Seunghyun, who became the lone guitarist this tour said, “during this tour, my position changed. Because there was not much time to practice, I considered cancelling the tour. However, I tried my hardest in order to protect our promise to you. You never know where life will lead you next. I received a lot of power from you. Thank you very much.”
On the first day at Toyosu PIT, his performance was filled with uncertainty. However, by the last day he showed us a stable and relaxed performance. There’s no mistaking it, Seunghyun was the one who grew the most during this tour.
“I’ve spent more than half my life with FTISLAND. From now on, we will work hard to protect the precious name of FTISLAND, so please give us your continued support.” (Minhwan)
“I used to worry about things like ‘why do you guys like us?’. Now, I just want to move forward with you all. We were nothing. Thank you so much for giving us the opportunity to shine.” (Jaejin)
One by one, they expressed their gratitude to the fans. Then, Hongki continued.
“Your support has strengthened our bond. You passed it on to us during every live, and I felt myself sigh after it was over. It wasn’t a sigh of worry, but rather a ‘thank goodness.’ I’m grateful,” Hongki said.
As he brought the concert to a close, he said “This is ‘Arigato’, a song that carries many meanings,” and launched into the first line of ‘Arigato’.
“We did it yesterday, so you would be mad if we didn’t do it today, right?” Hongki added as he surged into ‘Stay What You Are’. Hongki showed an amazing smile as he watched fans sing along determinedly. When the song finished, calls for another encore immediately rose. With ‘Orange Days’, this became the first triple encore of the tour. One final time, the sound of fans singing along swelled, bringing the concert to a close.
From now on, FTISLAND has become a 4-person band. On the first day, the fans conveyed their worries, however the 4 members responded one by one to these feelings during their performances. It felt as though the bonds between them and their fans have gradually grown even stronger. During this final performance, on this day, in this venue, it was certain that everyone thought, “even with only 4 people, this is FTISLAND.”
After this, FTISLAND will return to the Hiroshima City Cultural Exchange Hall on August 24 for a make-up performance. The previous performance on April 20 was cancelled due to the poor condition of Hongki’s throat.
Hongki will also be holding his solo fan-meeting ‘Never Ending Story’ on July 12 and 13 at Pacifico Yokohama, National Convention Hall of Yokohama.
Jaejin will be participating as a guest bassist during ‘N.FLYING 2019 Live in Japan Brotherhood’ starting from June 4.
Hongki gave a teaser that “there might be a surprise soon.” It seems that FTISLAND could be preparing chances for concerts right up until the moment they leave.
Credits: Sakamoto Yukari @ Excite News
Setlist:
1. Flower Rock
2. BEAT IT
3. Boom Boom Boom
4. SATISFACTION
5. ハルカ (Haruka)
6. シアワセオリー (Theory of Happiness)
7. AQUA
8. Take Me Now
9. Pray
10. Soyogi
11. Brand-new days
12. Raining
13. いつか (Itsuka)
14. Distance
15. Hold the moon
16. Golden
17. FREEDOM
18. PUPPY
19. 未体験Future (Mitaiken Future)
20. God Bless You
<ENCORE>
1. Paradise
2. アリガト (Arigato)
3. Stay what you are
4. Orange Days
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