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#so upset and i dunno why
nippoisalien · 11 days
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Chapter 6 😾
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sparklingchim · 3 months
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#can i yap for a moment#im extremely sleepy but im feeling very upset and mad and confused#also lowkey questioning whether me feeling all that is justified or if i am overreacting#anyway#made out w a boy tonight#and he wanted to go to his place#and i was like no i wanna stay and dance with my girlies#and he gets upset??#asking why i'd kiss him if i don't wanna hook up and i said i just wanna have fun?#made me feel so stupid#that anger in me led to a little fight with another boy (who was unfortunately very cute) and i just wanted to punch him#i just hate when boys think they're so superior#so i argued with this stupid but hot man#until an ex? friend shows up and he was pretty drunk just yapping about things#anyway he basically told me he'd like to rekindle our friendship#but not in a heyy haven't talked in so long let's meet up again#it was in a heyy let's hang out again got a new big car and moved out of my parent's house 😋#which gave me the ick bc that's why we aren't friends anymore and i told him no multiple times#and got sad bc he was one of my closest friends#anyway and then we left the party#this guy pulls me aside the parking lot#and i was so embarrassed bc there were so many people and they were all looking and i could already see people gossiping about it#and i just wanted to die#and then he just CONFESSES??#gives me flowers and all which is saur saur cute#but i legit have zero feelings for him </3#and have commitment issues and have never been in a relationship and don't wanna be in one#actually grosses me out thinking about relationships </3#the confession was so random and i kinda lost another friendship? even tho i wouldn't rlly consider him a friend we just share sum classes#but yeah boys are so stupid and confusing and i dunno how and why i get myself into these situations :') m sorry just needed to rant </3
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edarfly · 3 months
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Here's a cursed concept for you what if serirei but reigen is taller
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opens-up-4-nobody · 2 months
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#i never really thought about a person being a finite thing. you can see the effects of a person after they die. in the unfinished projects.#in the rooms of clutter. in abandoned closets. in pictures and in mermered phrases. and you can see time#chipping away at those things. eroding away the evidance that a person existed. clothes move into other people's closets. projects are boxed#away. and a person becomes confined to photos and memories. and thats existentially terrifying but its not a bad thing. time erodes away all#things. that's how life works. matter and energy transforms.#we arent made to last forever. i dunno. i guess im still just rattled from being home even tho ive been back a week and a half.#and my brain tends to fixate on the wrong things. nearly 27 years of knowing someone eclipsed by a visual sequence lasting less than a day.#bc i just cant get over how scary it would be to die like that. to start losing control of your body. to not be able to feed yourself or get#to the bathroom. to have your mind be overcome by the toxins building up in your mangled and broken body.#and it could have been worse. it could have been a lot worse. but its still not fair. theres no good way to die. i dunno. i guess i just#miss my mom in some abstract way but i find it more viscerally upsetting to think about the people that have to deal with her absence.#it makes me sad that my dad is alone now. i dunno. grief doesnt feel like i thought it would. most of the time i dont even know what im#crying about. its undirected. it doesnt feel like: i miss you. it feels like: youre gone. how can you be gone? why does everything feel the#same? and its not that it doesnt make sense. its that nothings changed. the terror of that.#and im walking around in an acumulation of my dead mother's clothes. and no one knows. theyll never know.#and there's nothing to be done about it. so it goes.#i guess im just sad. and its hard to breathe at the thought of returning to school at the end of August.#unrelated
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hollow-keys · 9 months
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New reaction image just dropped!
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hinakyuu · 3 months
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gonna have to start watermarking everything i make
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dreamcast-official · 1 month
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my most controversial take is i dont even mind seeing nsfw/suggestive art of characters sometimes (obviously depends on a lot of things) but what REALLY bothers me is when the artists misrepresent the character's body type to make them "sexier". like im sorry if that lady has a small chest and you insist on drawing her with huge tits in your porn you dont actually love her. same goes for male characters if that guy is flat as a board and you draw him with a six pack for the sake of tittilation (no pun intended) i dont think you like him. grow up.
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w3ath3r-0f-sw34t3rz · 7 months
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lyric of the day ˚♫⋆。˚ ⋆
"now, now, you need to calm down does she still think of me? say my name in her sleep i thought you knew her better than me"
oh yeah, you gonna cry? lovejoy
**EDIT:** i did not mean to have such horrendous timing considering yesterday's tomfoolery as i had no idea. twas but a cruel cruel coincidence
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#makuhita#so fun fact about makuhita. this was my favorite pokémon when i was a kid#i don't know *why* it was‚ i just know that me as a kid really liked this pokémon. i think it was something about their eyes and their round#shape that just made me think it was cute. they're certainly not my favorite pokémon anymore as my favorite has shifted over and over#recently as i've been figuring everything out but this one i distinctly remember being my favorite when i was a kid#and that was before i even played rt to know abt the makuhita dojo. it was totally in isolation of that. i really just liked the way it look#ed. i'm pretty sure it's 'cause one of the fuckers in pyrite had a shadow makuhita? and that's how i like. came to figure out they existed#i remember not wanting to purify them bc i thought shadow rush was too good and they kept getting boring moves like focus energy#that i thought were useless bc they didn't do damage and so i thought it was gonna get *another* bad move to replace shadow rush#i dunno it was a whole thing. even after i purified them i remember being so upset when they evolved into hariyama#bc i did not like the way hariyama looked at all and thought it was an abomination compared to makuhita#i think i ended up making a new save file and just mashing B every time they tried to evolve. which i figured out you could do#and that's. that's my makuhita story. every time i see this pokémon i think about that story. because it's so rare#no one ever talks about makuhita so i feel like it's rare that i actually get to remember this. so i still do every time
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sepiamestus · 7 months
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Its so weird to see ppl actively posting ab the p/jo show rn especially since theyrea bunch of the people who made a big hubbub ab people reading h/p. Like i dont want to be the morality police it just seems a little. Transparent. idk.
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hellfyre · 8 months
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i want to draw Azazel and Lilith i love her design i think they’d be besties who have a fling at some point. (I just love her design okay she deserves the sapphic stick)
They’d be so upset when she disappears.
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ollies-moving-castle · 4 months
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this is actually so funny……. 😭😭😭
I told you to ignore that….i said please and everything
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daz4i · 11 months
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at the risk of sounding like the "JUST LIKE BIDEO GAME" meme. i did just figure out a great analogy for how i feel abt most health tips
it's really really really really really hard to do things. to the point it feels impossible. and most people would just say "hard is not impossible! that means there's still a chance!" but like. you know how in some games you can speed to the final boss from the start, or start a certain section of them when you're underleveled and have no gear? it's like. technically, you can do it. it's not impossible to do these battles. look how many people finished the game and did it already! yes, they were a higher level, yes, they had all the right gear or they looked up some guides on the perfect build to beat them, but they did it! that means you can too! you being underleveled makes it harder, but it's not impossible!
like. do you see where I'm getting at here. certain disabilities and mental illnesses make it so you're permanently underleveled. and you can't level up. at most you can find some gear (meds, mobility aids, painkillers etc) or party members (loved ones) who can help you, but you can't do much damage yourself, and one hit will make you go down. some people can do it. some people like you can still pull off some perfect combo and beat the boss. but most people, in this state, can't.
and like. you can go do the easier parts, ofc. you can do low level missions and beat low level areas. but you can't level up, so you can't proceed (best way i can put it is. these areas simply don't give enough xp for that. your game has this weird glitch that only goes away after you pass a certain part of the game - that's a way higher level than you are - so just make sure to get through it and you'll be fine!). or maybe you have the perfect build and gear to beat some high level bosses you run into, but none of the others. like. you bought the game and you can play it. you just can't really do much in it and it all becomes very repetitive at some point. every time you try to step out of those missions you're used to, you get decimated, and eventually it just starts being honestly scary to try.
I'm mostly talking about my depression here, tbh. i think the most despair inducing part of it is seeing how some people still manage to proceed, pass that glitched out area, and are able to level up and even finish the game, while you still can't bc you, fuck i dunno, don't have fast enough reflexes to pull off some perfect combo you need to get through it. you go online and see how people keep praising the game and how fun it is but you literally can't see it
and this analogy applies to p much every single task, every single thing you need to do in order to get better. technically, it's possible, but it's so hard it might as well not be. and most people see it as super basic, super easy, even other people who were in your situation don't seem to remember how hard it was now that they're past it, because managing to do it somehow shattered that feeling of impossibleness they may have had (and tbf, they probably had to be very persistent and try time and time again. and. i really don't have that quality in me tbh)
idk it's probably very silly. if you read it then thanks, hope i didn't put you off with that lol. if you relate (not just about depression, but anything that can be disabling you may have going on) then I'm glad you can feel seen by this and also I'm sorry you're going through this 🙏 if you don't relate then I'm happy for you 🫡
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opens-up-4-nobody · 7 months
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...
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aterribleinfluence · 4 months
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ive been the butt end of 2 relatively homophobic/transphobic comments from customers at work this weekend and im feeling weird about it
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spookywriters · 6 months
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Won't name the genre because I don't feel up to dealing with any randos who feel the need to be deliberately obtuse about what I'm saying but:
Sometimes I want to take some people aside and say "Hey, maybe this isn't The Genre for you, that's okay. What isn't okay is you continuing to engage with it and then complaining when it does what its supposed to do, or does something you personally don't care for and calling it bad or Problematic™ for doing so"
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