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jahayla-parker · 1 year

Note

hi! I was wondering if you could do Kaz with a tour her sister or something where he doesn’t want her to get hurt but she thinks that he thinks that she’s weak? (That sounded so confusing sorry) if you can’t it’s fine though. Don’t forget to drink water! And maybe take a little walk?

-🍁

Worrier and Warrior : Platonic/Sibling Kaz Brekker x Sister!Reader

Part 1

Desc: Kaz’s little sister is the latest victim of Kaz’s lack of communication and transparency. This results in actions that cause even more tension between them. Will Kaz ever get over his toxic habits and be truthful with his sister or will it be too late?

Warnings: SoC type content and applicable warnings, including mentions of trauma, violence, sickness, injuries, death, etc.

Part Two Can Be Found Here

Both parts can be found here

Y/n groaned to herself as she sat in the chair across from Kaz’s desk. She’d had enough of his behavior lately. He’d been excluding her from heists and even refused to let her work nights at the Crow’s Club. Y/n knew her brother well enough to know there had to be a reason for his behavior. Kaz never did anything without thinking it through.

Kaz limped into the room exuding his annoyance, having had to follow his sister into his office. He did not want to talk. Much less talk about this matter. He had his reasons behind his behaviors and he didn’t feel he needed to explain them to her.

Yet, she’d snapped at her brother moments ago. She hasn’t intended on doing so, but she couldn’t help it. She felt excluded and unwanted thanks to Kaz’s actions. So, when he gave out shift assignments and once again left her off of it, she snapped and called him out on it. Kaz ordered her to head to his office, hence why they were both sitting in the dusty room in the attic.

Y/n stared silently at her brother as he sat down across from her. Kaz copied her and silently shook his head as his eyes glowered at her. Neither sibling spoke for awhile. It was only when y/n huffed and stood up to leave that Kaz elected to speak.

“You have nothing to say?” Kaz remarked, raising his right eyebrow at her.

Turning back to him, she glared, “you’re the one who ordered me to your office”.

“Because you raised your voice at me before my crew” Kaz argued, shifting his jaw.

Y/n laughed sarcastically, “I raised my voice before your crew?”

Kaz steepled his hands as he stared at her silently.

“First, you’re not my parent Kaz! You’re my older brother, but you’re not in charge of me” y/n huffed, crossing her arms over her chest.

Kaz flinched faintly at the mention of their family. Y/n noticed and thought about apologizing. But, she knew that would only make him more mad. Besides, his immediate return to his dismissive body language removed any guilt she felt.

“Second, I am part of your crew! Yet, you treat me like I’m different” y/n pointed out, stepping closer to him.

Kaz tilted his head slightly to the left, “you are different”.

“Why? Because I’m your sister?” She groaned, throwing her head back.

“Younger sister” he corrected stoically.

She squinted at him as she returned to her seat before him, “so?”

“So you need to trust me. I am better equipped to handle these matters” he said confidently, an egotistical glimmer in his eyes. It made y/n want to reach across the table and punch it out.

“Just because you’re older? I can handle myself Kaz. Just last week I handled Guiblan and his crew by myself” y/n pointedly reminded him.

Kaz scoffed, leaning back in his seat dismissively. “Last week as in when you were stabbed during what should’ve been a simple task?” He remarked.

Y/n sank in her seat. She was suddenly weighed down with self-doubt and embarrassment. These weren’t often feelings that her brother made her feel. However, for that exact reason it felt extra heavy.

“Is that what this is about? That’s why I’m no longer assigned tasks or shifts?” She questioned quietly.

Her mind raced as she waited for his reply. It wasn’t like she tried to get hurt last week. Saints, she fought off numerous large men by herself even though no one else was supposed to even be there. She even still successfully completed her task. Yet, that wasn’t enough for him?

Kaz stayed silent. Instead of responding, he looked away from her. His eyes were now staring sharply at one of the cracks in his wall.

Y/n stood up to leave. “For the record, I was out numbered. Besides, there weren’t supposed to be any guards in the first place”.

“Not everything goes according to plan all the time” Kaz acknowledged with a small dismissive shrug.

Y/n bit her lip as her head lowered slightly at his comment. “I’m aware of that, but-“

“But, you weren’t able to handle it without getting injured” Kaz said, his eyes snapping back towards her. He quickly realized he almost revealed the real reason behind keeping y/n from being involved in any Crow or Dreg business. As such, he puffed his chest and added, “and then Nina had to waste her energy taking care of it and couldn’t work her next shift.”

Y/n balked, her already pale skin losing color. “Wasted her energy? Fuck you Kaz. I never asked for her to take care of my injury-“ y/n defended.

“You didn’t have to,” he snapped, slamming his gloved hands on table as he rose from his seat. “I take care of my Crows. This whole business doesn’t work without my investments operating at full capacity” Kaz reminded her.

She stated at Kaz silently for a second. Did he really just call his own sister an investment to his business? He was mad because she was utilizing too many resources? Resources she never asked for?

Y/n wasn’t sure what to say. But it didn’t matter. Because just as she opened her mouth to speak, Kaz interrupted.

“You were decommissioned for days and took Nina down with you. I cannot have that” he said, much more calmly this time. However, there was still a burning anger to his eyes.

“The others get hurt too Kaz, why am I the one needing to apologize for it?” Y/n questioned. She was hoping there was something she was missing. After all, if she were only an investment like the others, why was she being targeted by him?

Kaz once again broke eye contact. His gaze drifted to his cluttered desk this time. “I needed more from you” He said simply.

Y/n squinted, “tell me what you want and I’ll do it”. She didn’t understand what was happening. If her brother needed something from her, he would always just tell her. Why did that change?

“You cannot do it” Kaz stated emotionlessly.

Was that what it was? He was mad not just because she was utilizing too many resources. But because she was utilizing too many resources while not contributing enough in exchange?

Even more than that, he didn’t think she could? Kaz wasn’t an idiot. So was she truly that weak and incompetent? Y/n hadn’t thought so, but maybe she was wrong. “Ka-“ She began, hoping to clear the air.

“Y/n, listen to me. I know what I can and cannot assign you” He said dismissively, shaking his head in frustration.

She stared at the side of his face as he actively ignored her. There was suddenly this defeated heaviness settling into her chest. She took a deep breath before reluctantly asking one of the pressing questions in her mind. “So I’m done with it all?” Y/n questioned.

“If there are tasks I think you can handle, then I will inform you of such. Until then, drop this attitude” Kaz ordered.

She shook her head. The action mostly for herself over her disbelief; after all, he still wasn’t looking at her. “What do you expect me to do in meantime?” Y/n sighed.

Kaz groaned as he ran a leather glove covered hand through his tousled hair. “I don’t care. Read. Have a music session with Wylan. Saints, maybe have Inej or Jesper train you to handle fights.” He remarked, eyes flickering up to her frame.

Kaz watched as she visibly sank. Y/n shrunk in both posture and confidence right before his eyes. And then she was gone. It was all his fault; he knew that.

He even felt a morsel of guilt and regret over it. But that diminished when he recalled seeing his younger sister bleeding from a stab wound. Y/n had gotten the injury because of him. But that wouldn’t happen again. It couldn’t.

Kaz couldn’t let it happen again. He wasn’t sure if he could survive that. Sure, y/n had healed fine. But, it very easily could’ve ended in her death instead. That was something Kaz would do whatever necessary to prevent.

He’d lost his older brother Jordie. He couldn’t lose his younger sister as well. He loved and cherished her too much. Kaz and y/n had always been close.

They were both little when Jordie passed. All three siblings had gotten sick; but only two survived. His brother’s death tore apart almost every aspect of Kaz’s life. All the way down to his morals and life’s motivation. Yet, he didn’t let it tear his relationship with his little sister away.

Kaz had fought to keep himself and y/n alive ever since that day. Y/n had always looked up to Kaz. And while his behaviors changed drastically after Jordie’s death, hers didn’t. She continued to look up to Kaz and tried to be like him. That infuriated Kaz at first, until he realized it was the one thing that would truly keep her safe.

Yet, when she was stabbed last week, that notion evaporated. Kaz knew who was responsible. And he knew why they did it. He’d pissed off the wrong person.

Well, to Kaz there was no such thing. But when it came to getting his sister involved, that was different. She wasn’t supposed to be connected to or impacted by his actions. Yet, that night he’d sent her off on an errand only for her to come back bleeding because of him.

Kaz knew his words tonight made y/n think he saw her as weak. He also knew she took everything he said to her or thought of her to heart. He hated being the reason she now believed she wasn’t strong enough.

But, he told himself it was best this way. She’d likely not push as hard when he refused to let her attend heists or deny her shifts at the club. Both of which he needed to do to keep her safe. To keep her alive. To keep the last piece of himself afloat and alive.

“Kaz, that makes no sense” y/n argued.

It had only taken a few hours for y/n to decide she was going to prove Kaz wrong. Last night she’d elected to show him she wasn’t weak. That she was capable of contributing and keeping up with the others.

Therefore, when she overheard the plans for the crows to meet with Evrin Golding, a wealthy merchant, she tried to convince Kaz to let her join them. Much to Kaz’s dismay. However, he abruptly shut that down with a vague excuse as to why she couldn’t go.

“I don’t need to explain myself to you” Kaz sighed, grabbing his hat from the coat rack by his door.

Y/n huffed and glares at him. He was being so difficult. How could she prove herself if he wouldn’t let her go? “Yes, you do. Because I deserve to go. Plus you could use an extra set of eyes” she smirked.

Kaz rolled his eyes, “you’re not going.”

“That’s irrational and you know it” y/n argued weakly.

Her brother merely surged as he put his hat on, “clearly it runs in the family”.

She groaned and walked until she was blocking the door with her body, “Kaz,-“.

“You’re not going. I don’t want or need you there. End of discussion” Kaz spat.

Y/n frowned and stepped aside. She hadn’t expected herself to cave so quickly. Especially when she had the upper hand by blocking the door. Yet, Kaz’s words stung more than she’d expected.

It had only been a few moments of sulking in her self loathing before she ventured outside. Y/n knew where the meeting was to take place. So while Kaz may not have allowed her to go with, he couldn’t stop her from following after them. Sure it was somewhat childish, but it was the option she was left with if she didn’t want to just accept Kaz’s analysis of her.

Y/n quietly lowered herself to the ground beside Inej. They laid on their bellies atop an old abandoned building just outside of the Barrel. Inej of course had heard y/n coming, but the others hadn’t. As such, y/n allowed herself to get comfortable on the rooftop before watching the scene below.

“I tried to get him to let you come” Inej whispered as the wind whipped past them. It was just loud enough for y/n to hear before the wind carried the sound behind them; away from the others below.

Y/n smiled to herself as she whispered a grateful thank you to her friend. She was pleased to know at least Inej didn’t find her too weak to take part in tonight’s activities. However, it seemed even Inej couldn’t convince y/n’s older brother of her strength.

Y/n and Inej made hushed small talk as they watched from a distance. It was mostly about their latest events in their lives outside of the tasks they did for Kaz. Y/n knew Inej was trying to keep her mind off the fact y/n’s brother thought she was too weak to be here. It helped some; it always helped to talk with Inej.

However, a small disagreement between her brother and their contact easily caught her attention. Y/n and Inej immediately silenced in order to listen closer. They shared a knowing look as Kaz’s attitude only worsened the situation.

Y/n smirked to herself when she realized she could help Kaz. She knew she’d be able to not only help him get out unharmed, but also still complete the task at hand. Kaz was great at reading people. So he had to know how his behavior was worsening the situation.

But Y/n knew when it came to Pekka, Kaz’s vision blurred. This man Kaz was trying to get intel from was part of Pekka’s crew and could be yanking his chain.

Of course y/n hated Pekka with her entirety as well. But, she was able to separate his crew from him. They hadn’t been there. It didn’t mean she liked them, but rather could tolerate them just long enough to handle the task without her emotions taking over. Part of it had to do with her dissociating from her emotions and traumas; but it worked. At least for matters like this. Matters in which her remaining older brother’s fury blinded him and endangered his life. She wouldn’t lose another brother, and certainly not at the hands of Pekka again. So she’d mastered over the years how to not let Pekka or his crew impact her the way it did Kaz. It wasn’t healthy for her as she had to dismiss her traumatic experiences. But, it kept Kaz from taking it too far and getting killed in his search for revenge.

“Excuse me, I have to go make a scene." Y/n whispered to Inej. She slowly rose from the ground and walked to the far end of the building. It would be best if she acted like she stumbled upon the two of them. Kaz wouldn’t believe it for a second, but the Dime Lion easily would if she did it right.

“Y/n, I wouldn’t cross Kaz. His sister or not, no one crosses him” Inej warned, looking over her shoulder at y/n. She sighed when she saw the determined look in y/n’s eyes. It was the same look Kaz got when he was set firmly on a decision he’d made.

“Well, what can I say? I'm a badass." She winked as she jumped down from the back of the building. Y/n quickly made her way around the building to join the scene she’d witnessed from above. She noticed the way the Dime Lion grinned at her as his eyes scanned her body.

She also noticed how livid her brother was. Of course she did, he was practically steaming. Anyone could see how Kaz’s eyes bore into her as he watched her approach. But, she ignored his unspoken order to leave.

“Hi, I’m y/n” y/n greeted, smiling innocently as she stood before their contact.

Kaz remained by her side, his hand tight on the crows head of his cane. If he hadn’t wanted to kill the Dime Lion earlier, he certainly did now. He despised y/n ignoring him and following him out here. But he could have killed the man before him for falling for y/N’s faux innocent play. Especially when the man kept checking her out.

“Well hello there beautiful, I’m Dan-“ the contact began, extending his hand towards y/n.

Kaz cut him off by swinging his cane down between them and shook his head. “Your name does not matter. Nor do her looks. We are here for one thing-“ Kaz barked.

“What my brother means to say,” y/n forced a giggle, “is that I could really use some help from you”.

This was one of the ways y/n and her brother Kaz differed greatly. Kaz refused to show weakness, even if it was fake. Y/n however, didn’t mind pretending. She knew better than to show her true weakness(es). But she was willing to utilize faux ones.

After all, y/n knew she men -especially those in Ketterdam- saw women as far weaker. While y/n knew she could easily take most of these men by herself, she saw their ignorance as a tool. It made it a lot easier to get someone off guard if they let their own guard down due to thinking she was merely a weak girl.

However, she was now wondering if that’s why Kaz saw her the same way. Did he fall for her pretend innocence and ignorance? How could he have? Did he still see her as the little girl she was before they lost Jordie?

She had to push these thoughts aside and refocus on the current moment. Y/n forced on a tender smile as she waited for the man to respond.

He seemed to be intelligent enough to not fall for it immediately. However, as he looked back over at y/n’s ‘shy’ body language, he caved. “Of course darling, I was just telling your brother that I’d love to help. Especially for a damsel like yourself” the man smiled, pretending he hadn’t been arguing with Kaz moments ago.

Kaz’s grip on his cane tightened dangerously. He wouldn’t have been surprised if he snapped off the crows head at the top of the cane. It was all Kaz could do to get himself to silently go along with y/n’s fake storyline. It was all he could do to control his brotherly protectiveness. It was all Kaz could do to not kill the man where he stood.

To say Kaz was pissed would be a grave understatement. Yet, no one could truly find the right word to describe his current state. He stood rigid, his sharp eyes burning holes in y/n’s. The tension in the air palpable.

Kaz had ignored her the entire return to the slat. He refused to go off on her in the streets where others could see or hear. He didn’t need anyone knowing how much she mattered to him. How much her actions and safety swayed him.

As such, he kicked everyone out of the slat as they returned. Well, everyone but his crows. He’d ordered them out but didn’t have enough focus or concern to force them to leave. They already knew how Kaz was with his sister anyways.

This meant the crows all stood silently as they watched in anxious anticipation. While Inej had been the only one to have seen what happened, it wasn’t hard to piece it together. The crows knew stubbornness ran in the Brekker family. So they knew it was only a matter of time before y/n pissed Kaz off by disobeying his latest orders for her.

Kaz tried to control his anger towards his sister. He could feel the raging fury alive and consuming inside of him. But he didn’t want to be mad at her much less act out against her (especially if it was only due to said emotions). Yet, as the scene replayed in his mind, he felt panic merge with his anger.

“What the hell were you thinking?!” Kaz spat, stalking closer to where she sat.

Jesper’s eyes widened as he watched his friends nervously. “Kaz, man, maybe-“ he awkwardly interjected. His goal was to calm Kaz down before he said something he’d regret. But his interruption only resulted in him getting chewed out as well.

The crows froze in their places as they listened to the loud bickering between y/n and Kaz. They weren’t sure what to have expected. The siblings disagreed from time to time, but this was something very different. To make matters worse, both of them were stubborn and angry. That wasn’t a good mix in anyone, but much less in a Brekker.

“I told you I cannot rely on you” Kaz stated, adding another insult to the mix he’d already thrown her way tonight. He refused to look at her as he said it. But, he kept his head high and voice loud and authoritative nonetheless.

Y/n shook her head at him as she took a deep breath. It wasn’t that this comment was worse than the others. But she’d had enough. Y/n may have acted out of an attempt to prove herself, but she also did it to protect him. Yet, he still shouted insults at her.

She once again found herself feeling ashamed and weak. Y/n might have no problem pretending to be these things to get people to do what she wanted. But that didn’t mean she wanted people to actually believe them. Much less her fellow crows. Much less her brother. And much less herself.

Y/n quietly stood and turned to head to bed before her emotions could show. She heard Kaz ordering her to stay where she was. But, what was one more disappointment from her?

Y/n had barely made it to her room before she broke down. She locked her door and slid down the thin wood until her butt hit the floor. Maybe Kaz was right. Maybe she was too weak to handle this. After all, here she was, practically sobbing over an argument with her brother.

Kaz entered her room later that night. By then, she’d composed herself and removed any signs of her heartbreak. Which was good because he’d only come to lecture her further.

Y/n spaced off early on into his latest speech about how she had let him down. She didn’t care to hear it anymore. It hurt and she was furious that Kaz was the one hurting her.

As Kaz went to continue venting his annoyance, he noticed she seemed distant. Furrowing his brows, he asked "Are you even listening to me?"

Y/n let her eyes return to focus, and shook her head. “No, but you don’t want me to be” she admitted, clicking her tongue.

Kaz growled quietly, “Hmm and why is that?”

"I will break your nose if you keep talking about how weak I am. I’ve heard it enough” she explained, looking away from his intense stare.

Kaz saw the pain flickering in her eyes despite her response. He sighed and took a long deep breath before speaking. His tone was much less harsh as he told her, “I did not say you are weak”.

Y/N’s eyes snapped back to him, annoyance overtaking her pain. “Not directly, but you still did” she argued.

“What do you want from me? To coddle you and your feelings?” Kaz retorted. Guilt hit him instantly but he held his ground. He would ignore his guilt if it meant keping y/n safe.

“Why are you treating me like I’m your enemy and not a friend?” Y/n whispered, her voice soft again.

“You’re not my friend y/n” Kaz groaned. He hated the way her face fell even more at his words. But, this was what needed to be done.

“You’re right, I’m your sister. That’s worse” she acknowledged, her voice cracking.

Kaz wasn’t sure how to respond. He didn’t want to make her feel worse. But, he also couldn’t apologize. So, he leaned against her desk silently.

“Get out” y/n ordered meekly.

While Kaz debated ignoring her, he decided against it. He could see how defeated his sister was. So, while he wouldn’t act on his guilt and apologize, he could at least offer her some space. Kaz glanced back at her one more time before leaving her room.

“Aren’t you in a cheery mood” Jesper teased sarcastically as y/n rolled her eyes yet again when Kaz was speaking.

“I have a right to be angry." Y/n retorted, shaking her head.

“Could you be any more annoying?” Kaz asked as he stopped reading off his list of today’s assignments.

Y/n glared across the room at him, “Excuse me?”

Kaz rolled his eyes back at her. “You heard me y/n” he stated calmly. “You’re making us go in circles. We’ve been over this. You’re not taking part in any of the Crows’ or Dregs’ tasks unless I say so” Kaz reminded her. “So stop interrupting the meeting with your infuriatingly annoying emotions” he ordered.

“Kaz,” Inej sighed, shaking her head at him as she gave him a knowing look.

Jesper bravely jumped in again as Kaz glared at Inej. “Y/n has been training with Inej and I, daily. She’s great” Jesper informed him. He watched as y/n nodded in acknowledgment of the training sessions they’d had the last few weeks.

Y/n noticed how Kaz froze and seemed to be pondering Jesper’s remark. “Told you, I’m not weak” she huffed, sending him a glare.

“Y/n, I-“ Kaz sighed, shaking his head.

“Just let me come, I can keep up” y/n pleaded, sitting up straight thanks to Jesper’s compliment.

Kaz took a deep breath. “No” he responded defiantly.

“But Kaz,-“ y/n argued, leaning forward in her seat.

“No” was all he responded with again as he shook his head.

“Come on, you know I am not too weak for this life. Admit I’m right” y/n said. Part of her was teasing in hopes he’d loosen up some. But the other part of her wanted him to say she wasn’t weak. She was still struggling with her own belief on the topic and needed him to clarify it for her.

“I will do not such thing” Kaz said.

Y/n chose to ignore the clenching of her chest and lungs at his refusal. Instead, she reminded herself that he never liked to give others compliments. But there was one thing he hated more. As such, she pressed her luck by responding, “Fine, then admit you’re wrong”.

“No” he groaned, dismissing her with that one word sentiment again.

Y/n threw her hands in the air dramatically. “Quit acting like this you stupid wet sock” she sighed. Y/n could hear the quiet laughter of the crows over the unusual insult. But she knew Kaz would pick up on it.

Y/n hated wet socks and Kaz knew that. She’d hated them ever since she was old enough to say so. It was her final straw when the orphaned siblings had found themselves out on the streets of Ketterdam. She couldn’t handle the feeling on her feet and the cold nights only made it worse. In fact, she had verbally blamed the wet socks for the three of them having caught the illness that took Jordie from them.

So, while it seemed like a humorously random insult to the Crows, Kaz was actually impacted by it. He knew it hadn’t been her intention to bring his mind back to that night. Much less to insult him by calling him the one thing she blamed for what happened. Kaz knew she’d never do that, even if she were furious with him.

But, that didn’t mean he was able to keep it from impacting him or his response. He glared across his desk at her before walking to the door. “You’re staying here! It's better for everyone!” Kaz shouted as he angrily walked out.

Y/n once again elected to ignore Kaz. She was determined to prove him wrong. Y/n was also determined to prove to herself she could handle it. As a result, she was once again on a sketchy rooftop with Inej.

The girls silently watched the scene below. In which Kaz was pretending to bargain with the merchant. The plan was for Nina to pickpocket the merchant while Kaz and Jesper had him distracted.

It all seemed to be going according to plan at first. However, that quickly changed when one of the merchant’s men noticed and let out a calling sound. Suddenly, twelve armed men appeared, surrounding Kaz and Jesper.

The sharpshooter had drawn his pistols but was waiting on a sign from Kaz to pull the trigger. However, Kaz calmly shifted his gaze up to the rooftop instead. Y/n flattened herself out even further, hiding behind the ledge of the roof. Inej gave her a soft giggle as she rose to join Kaz.

Once Kaz saw Inej caught his signal, he finally gave Jesper his. Within seconds the trade meeting erupted into a battle. Y/n wanted to go down and help, but she still feared that Kaz might be right. If he was and she went down there, she’d only make it worse.

So she remained steady on the rooftop. Her eyes danced over the chaos, checking everyone’s safety. That was when she saw her brother had been knocked down. Kaz was struggling to return to his feet when a gun was placed against the back of his head.

Y/n didn’t hesitate any longer. She flung her quiver over her shoulder, grabbing a single arrow before setting the quiver beside her. As she loaded the arrow into her bow, she took a deep breath and stared intently at her target.

Kaz looked up from the ground and over to where the arrow had come from. His eyes narrowed as he saw his sister on the roof. Despite his orders to stay at the Slat. Kaz shook his head as his relief quickly changed into anger.

“Nice shot” Jesper grinned, slinging his arm over y/n’s shoulder after she’d made her way down to them.

“Y/n,” Nina smiled, “glad you could join us!”

Y/n smiled back and shrugged, “Well, it’s more like I crashed the party, since I wasn’t invited, but-“.

”You weren't invited because no one wanted you to come." Kaz spat, staring her down.

“I just saved your life Kaz-“ y/n argued, waving her arm around to the now-dead bodies on the street.

Kaz shook his head and gritted his teeth. “You just risked my life and everyone else’s” he replied.

“Excuse me? He’s dead, he was going to kill you. I handled it” y/n pointed out in disbelief. She’d literally taken someone’s life to keep him safe and he was still mad?

Kaz remained angry. “You weren’t to be here. You risked everyone’s safety by throwing the plan off” he rebutted. He knew it wasn’t entirely true and that it might sound like a stretch even to his Crows. But he hoped y/n would focus on his need to be in charge of the plans at all times.

“Having a gun pointed to your head while knocked on the ground was part of the plan?!” Y/n snapped, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Y/n” Kaz warned, his voice clipped.

She shook her head, “No, if you don’t want me throwing off the plan then just include me to start with”.

“How many times must I tell you no?” Kaz groaned, running a hand through his sweaty hair.

“Until it makes sense!” She retorted, smirking at him confidently.

Kaz moved his hand back down and laid it over his other on top of his cane. “It does make sense! You were not included because I did not want you here. You are more of a risk than you are helpful.” He told her, eyes staring at her abdomen as he spoke.

“So you killed the man, good for you, who cares? “ Kaz asked rhetorically. He regretted that remark as he knew killing someone wasn’t something y/n took lightly. But, Kaz nonetheless continued to berate her for risking herself. “If you were here from the start, it would’ve been worse. You’re a weakness and liability. When will you comprehend that?” Kaz huffed.

“Is that truly how little you think of me?" Y/n asked, her voice weak and shallow.

Kaz felt himself wanting to give in and confess the reality behind his anger. To express that he didn’t see her as weak, but still worried about her being taken from him. But, he wouldn’t let himself. He merely nodded even though it weren’t one hundred percent true.

“Fine. I comprehend that” y/n stated emotionlessly as she turned around and left.

Kaz sighed in relief that the conversation was over. He had the feeling this time he finally got through to her. Her dejected response and giving up on the argument suggested such.

Kaz had assumed y/n went back to The Crow’s Club or the Slat when she left the scene earlier that night. As such, when he arrived, he sent Inej to check on her state. He knew his Crows were all judging him for having said the things he did to her. But, he only asked Inej to check on her because he wanted to know she had made it back safely, not because he was going to apologize.

Kaz was sitting in his office, resting his head in his hands. He was nursing a headache and his leg was brutally assaulting him with pain. Yet, his mind couldn’t stop thinking about how to keep y/n from trying to dismiss his orders again. He couldn’t face losing her. But what levels would he go to if it meant hurting her along the way?

Before he’d had time to analyze that question, Inej entered his room. He glanced up from his hands and squinted at her. She seemed concerned which set him on high alert. “Well?” Kaz asked impatiently.

“She’s not here” Inej whispered, wincing as he watched fear flash through his eyes.

“What do you mean she’s not here?” Kaz asked sharply.

“She’s not here Kaz, it’s straightforward” Inej remarked, “she must have headed elsewhere”.

Kaz stiffly breathed in and out through his flared nostrils. “Go” he ordered. “Find her” Kaz clarified, closing his eyes.

Inej falteted. She wasn’t sure bothering y/n was the best solution. Inej also doubted Kaz would respond well to y/n when she got back from wherever she’d gone off to. “Kaz-“ she drawled.

“Find her and bring her ho-“ Kaz coughed. “-back here” he corrected, eyes still squeezed shut.

Inej silently nodded and left to track down her friend.

Part Two Here

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calix-amini · 1 month

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do yuo have twobit headcanons? asking for a frien d

hehe yes sirrr

two bit headcanons

-this man has never seen a stick of deodorant. EVER.

-he takes showers just not frequently

-and when he does it’s probably just him using 3 in 1 and then stepping out

-this guy would do BOTH types of drag race! car and rupaul

-he’d also probably wear his moms old dresses and go “look ma! im you!!”

-two bit and steve are the forgotten members of the gang so they hang out when the others dont

-he LOVED coloring with his sister when she was a toddler and listening to her talk about her day

-scratch that he loves his sister so much that whenever she would cry he would too

-he’s actually a little self conscious of his hair ! like he likes his sideburns but he hates the rest of his hair

-he has random different-colored splotches of skin on his skin? like just a little darker or a little lighter

-his eyes are realy prety :3333

-his love language is physical affection

-he would LOVE tyler the creator SO MUCH

-two bit and ponyboy are a little closer after the events of the book (canon version and the “everyone lives” version) and even tries to sit down and watch a movie with him :) (he didn’t make it past the title screen oof :,p)

-he still hates socs but now he doesn’t prank the ones that didn’t do anything to him/ to the gang

-him and marcia are going steady (so are marcia and randy, so they get into some fights)

-his breath smells like booze 24/7 even when he didn’t drink

-i don’t think he brushes his teeth too much

-he loves climbing trees

-he turns into a sappy little man whenever he sees a cute pet

#the outsiders 1983 #the outsiders #two bit mathews #two bit mathews headcanons #two bit headcanons #headcanon

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alittlebitofloveliness · 1 month

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Outsiders Prompt fic 1- Aren't you tired of this?

This for @battleslippers who requested prompt #6 and Tim Shepard

******************

“Heyyy Tim,” Curly was sprawled out on the sofa for the third time this week, glassy eyed and sloppy. Ma was beside him, eyes the sort of bright Tim knew could go from nice to nasty in an instant and for a second he thought he might cry.

He didn’t- of course he didn’t- but he could’ve. Shit, Curly was takin’ this whole situation real hard. He’d always liked his booze a bit too much but Tim figured that was just part of their DNA. This was something else though. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen his kid brother truly sober.

“Timmy,” Ma smiled and Tim felt his shoulders tense. There was no good ending to his mother’s brief moments of excitement. He’d survived enough of her tantrums and rages to know it, “come sit with us! Have a drink.”

She’d always liked him the best.

“No,” he tugged the bottle of tequila out of Curly’s hand, “I think you’ve both had enough.”

Ma’s face darkened, “I am your mother. Don’t think you can tell me when I have and haven’t had enough.”

His mother. Right. Maria Shepard wasn’t his mother. She was a child without a childhood. A baby who’d had babies. A monster of her own making.

“Fine,” he knew better than to argue. They wouldn’t make it through the afternoon without her screaming, but if he played his cards right they might get a few more hours of peace, “but Curly’s done.”

She didn’t fight him. She never did when it came to the twins, never had, never once even wanted to.

“Aw that ain’t fair,” Curly protested, but his voice was slurred and he was too drunk to stand on his own let alone fight him on it. Tim passed the liquor over to Ma, who immediately took a swig. “I wasn’t- wasn’t finished.”

“Oh you’re finished all right,” moving to the side of the couch, he wrapped one arm around Curly's thin shoulders- christ the kid needed to eat more- and hauled him to his feet, half carrying, half dragging him down the hall to his room.

He dumped him onto the mattress on his side of the room. Angela had propped hers up on milk crates years ago but Curly had always left his on the ground, always slept curled up in the far corner, even when he was a baby, like if only when was small enough and far enough beneath notice he could ever have a chance at resting.

“Aren’t you tired of this?” Tim asked, “The boozin’ and the drugs- don’t say you ain’t tried anything, why else would you be a mama’s boy all of a sudden? Seriously kid, you’re killin’ me here.”

“Nah,” cloudy blue eyes blinked at him, “I’m killin’ myself.”

A shock of panic shot through him like lightning.

“Shut up!” He shook his kid brother’s shoulders half desperately, “You ain’t! Shut up!”

The faintest hint of that troublemaker grin showed on his face, “you can’t stop me.”

“Watch me.”

Curly’s eyes filled with tears. Tim couldn’t say he didn’t expect it. Drunk folk were awful predictable, even though Curly was- per usual- trying to give him a heart attack.

“He’s gone, Tim,” Curly’s voice broke, the drunken grin and sardonic comments replaced with such genuine misery Tim can feel it stinging even him, “they- the socs- the socs killed him. Drowned him in a fountain like-like he wasn’t nice and smart and good-”

“-I know,” Tim doesn’t really do affection and Curly doesn’t usually like it but shit the kid needs something, and per usual Tim is all he’s got, so he pulls him into a hug tight enough to bruise even though its clunky and awkward not a Shepard type thing to do. Those damn socs had already taken one east side kid this month. He’d be damned if he let them take another- even indirectly. He’d be damned if they took Curly. “Shit kid, I know.”

“He was my friend.” Tim knew that wasn’t strictly true. Ponyboy Curtis had always meant more to Curly than a simple friend.

“I know.”

Curly swallowed convulsively before starting to sob in earnest, tears soaking into Tim’s sweatshirt.

“It’s ok,” Tim said, knowing it wasn't any sort of ok, “it’ll be alright.”

They stayed like that until Curly finally fell asleep.

#the outsiders #tim shepard #curly shepard #ponyboy curtis #purly #the outsiders fanfiction #lovelythoughts

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wannaseewhatshangin · 1 year

Note

hii i love your work 💗💗, could you do sort of like a forbidden love thing with fem reader x dallas winston where she’s a soc so they aren’t supposed to be together but he would do anything for her and do anything to be with her

Awwww 🤭🧸dally is so cute

Dallas Winston x soc! Reader

It was quite a surprise when Dallas took a liking to you

But at the same time

Some people say they saw it coming

You and Dallas were bound to fall in love

You definitely weren’t like any soc he has met before

“Hey..”

Him asking about you was the icing on the cake

“How do y’all feel about that y/n girl?..”

He definitely trails off any time he talks about you

The boys were astonished

“You ain’t diggin this girl are ya, dally?”

He definitely tried to deny it

“Hell no. Why would I? Girls have cooties.. 😒”

Hell, sometimes he couldn’t even decide how he felt

But when you smiled at him at the corner store

Not a mocking smile

But a sweet, innocent and soft smile

It really set him off

You were allowed on greaser territory

Nobody else

Just you

Because you weren’t like everybody else

And boy was he head over heals

Of course he’s gonna say he ain’t

“You fallin for this girl? She’s a soc for Pete’s sake!”

“Nah, man. “

Yes he was

He was fallin hard

Of course he made a move

Like askin you out for a coke

Or whatever you like

If you say no

He won’t stop until he gets a yes

Of course if you say no about 50 times

His ego will be bruised but

He’ll bounce back eventually

But he’ll definitely be upset you know

If you say yes (which you did) this boy is down bad for you fr fr 🤭🧸

“Hey, doll.”

You would look at him and it made him feel some type of way

Fast forward to when you two are dating

This boy sneaks around the gang just so he can talk to you about anything

He misses you all the time

“Ay, where’s ol’ dally?” Two-Bit asked

Johnny almost said something

But he knew Dallas would kill him if he said anything.

“I don’t know.” Johnny said lowly

CUDDLES! CUDDLES! CUDDLES!

Please let this boy have his hands around your waist.

Please let him kiss your cheek.

This man WILL look you in the eyes and say that he don’t wanna cuddle and that he doesn’t like ‘em

Just wait in 3..2..1..

His hands are all over you.

He just can’t help it.

When he’s around you, he wants to make sure you think he’s tuff.

Of course you think he’s tuff.

“Dally…you’re the most tuffest guy I know. You don’t have to show off.”

His heart melts.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE let this man have his hand on your thigh while driving.

Let’s talk about work.

It doesn’t matter WHERE, WHAT, HOW, WHEN, OR WHO.

He’s gonna be there to take care of you.

Let’s just say you work at a diner.

First of all.

Your outfit is absolutely gorgeous on you.

According to Dallas.

“Aw! Babe, you look gorgeous.”(yes you do, babes!)

WITH HIS HANDS AROUND YOUR WAIST!

Doll, I can’t even say how much he loves you.

He will stay at the counter all night if he has to.

Just to help you out and keep you company.

Joking around is a must with Dally.

When your not looking, he will throw a small ball of napkin at you.

Which does stick to your hair.

Everyone can see how much in love you two are.

The elderly couple that sit in the back booth every Saturday.

The group of other teenagers that sit at the counter.

Lindsy, the girl who orders coffee from you and won’t take it from anybody else.

Mia, The little girl that gives you gum in return for a toy that comes with the kids meals.

You always put two toys in there for her. 🤫

The same three boys around the age of 14-15 that harass you while you work.

On several occasions, they made you cry.

“Aww. Is the soc gonna cry?”

You were on the verge of providing a waterfall .

They just wanted to bother you.

“Look please leave me alone.”

“Please leave me alone!!!” The boy in front mocked as he sat down.

They just laughed.

“She’s trembling!”

“Hey, young man. That’s no way to talk to such a sweet girl. You outta be ashamed of yourselves.” The elderly woman said, walking hand in hand with her husband.

“Get lost old fart.”

“How DARE you! She’s is just a sweet old lady! I’m so sorry mrs stevens. Your next Saturday meal is on me.” You said on the verge of tears as Mrs stevens reassured you it was alright.

Dallas was pissed.

He grabbed him by the collar.

“Who do you think you are? Talking to my girl like that. Has anybody ever taught you how to treat a woman?”

“If I EVER, see your face in this diner EVER again. I swear on my life I will fucking kill you. You think you’re hot shit? Huh? Say it.”

“I’m not.” He said, utterly terrified.

He shoved him to the ground.

Once the boys left you broke down into tears, picking up the food from the ground.

It broke Dally’s heart to see you in so much sadness.

He crouched down next to you, giving you a giant hug.

“I’m so, so proud of you, doll. You did amazing. You’re so strong.”

“Thanks dally, you’re real tuff.” You said, hugging him

You finished picking up the food and closed the diner up.

You and Dallas walked hand in hand down the street.

Now.

How about the gang found out.

Oh lord.

They would catch on when they saw lipstick marks on Dally’s cheek and he would smell straight up like a bottle of woman’s perfume.

Which smelled hella good.

“Dally? Who you been kissin on?” Two-Bit asked genuinely curious.

“Nobody, man.”

Johnny just kept his mouth shut. Like the good friend he is.

Two-bit showed him a mirror to show him all the kiss marks that you left behind.

Everyone else was concerned

But Dallas loved them.

He wish he could take a mental screenshot of this and save it forever.

Darry tried to wipe it off.

You know how moms lick their thumb and then rub it on you?

That. That’s Darry right there.

“No! Leave it!” Dally yelled quickly.

Sooner or later he was gonna have to come clean.

“Tell us the truth, Dally.”

He sighed.

“It’s y/n.”

Everyone was shocked but honestly they didn’t really care.

“And I love her and if you guys can’t accept my wishes then I don’t need to be close with y’all. We’re all buddies and I do love y’all but I love her too and I would do anything and everything for her.”

“Dallas shut up. We don’t give a fuck. To everybody else? They might care. But as your friends and all that, we don’t care. As long as your happy.” Darry said

He was so happy.

Let’s get back to the kiss marks.

Dallas loves them.

He thinks they are sweet.

He gets giddy anytime you leave a kiss mark behind.

He also, for some reason, thinks they make him look tuff.

He definitely has a few Polaroid photos of you and him.

Him laying in your bed with you kissing his cheek, leaving pink kiss marks.

He has pictures of those too.

At this point he just wanted them everywhere.

The smell of your perfume was intoxicating to him.

He felt like he was on cloud 9.

“You smell good.”

You would blush.

He definitely stays over most of the time.

Mostly because he misses you and can’t go even a few hours without you!?

Yes.

And let’s not forget that this guy.

Is Lana Del Ray coded everywhere.

I don’t wanna hear it.

I know Lana Del Ray wasn’t a thing back then.

But ima make a few changes.

If you had Lana Del Ray vinyls, cassette tapes, posters, anything.

He would definitely listen to her with you.

And IF he said he didn’t like her at first.

She will definitely start growing on him.

But if the first time you introduced him to her

And he liked it from the beginning.

He might be a bigger fan than you.

And for my girlies that love Aerosmith like me.

This guy would definitely like Aerosmith as well.

Like.

Sweet Emotion is a makeout song.

And he likes Walk this way, crazy, Janie’s got a gun, jaded, dream on, back in the saddle, rag doll, Angel and much more.

He loves to makeout.

Please.

Of course he won’t pressure you.

If he’s feeling like making out

He would kiss your neck

And if your not feeling it just say it.

“Hey, dal. I’m not really feeling it right now.”

“Oh alright. Sorry, doll.”

He would kiss your cheek and just lay with you.

But if you are feeling it.

Shit, go right ahead.

He would have smeared lipstick all over his swollen lips.

It’s definitely a pretty sight.

He loves you.

Don’t let him go.

Because as long as you hold on he will do the same.

He believes that you two found each other for a reason.

You two are meant to be.

#dallas winston headcanons #dallas winston x reader #sodapop headcanons #johnny cade #johnny cade headcanons #johnny cade x reader #sodapop x reader #ponyboy curtis #ponyboy headcanons #ponyboy x reader

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romantichopelessly · 1 year

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Shadow and Bone Season 2 Final Thoughts

I am going to split this into a SaB section and a SoC section, since I have very different thoughts on them.

Shadow and Bone

The Malina this season was EXCELLENT. Good stuff, excellent changes made on the front of Mal’s insane jealousy and miscommunication.

Gibson’s Nikolai was. So perfect?? I loved so much about him. He was just the right amount of dutiful and roguish, and I loved him.

Genya carried this season. The acting was so well done and always moving. She got the most tears out of me this season. Her confrontation with the queen & that scene in the last episode really got me.

No “I am not ruined. I am ruination.” Which was severely disappointing. I’m genuinely surprised it wasn’t there, because they kept in characters calling her ruined.

Tamar/Nadia were in just the perfect amount. They got crumbs in the book so I’m glad they at least got something here.

GenyaDavid was CARRYING this season. Every scene with those two was so heartachy. I cannot believe they moved up David’s death. But I’m not mad at it.

No “I am become a blade”. Honestly kind of glad for this kind of disappointed. It was funny as hell but also it would have been out of place so.

No Oncat???? Unforgivable omission.

Zoya deserved a bit more this season. Part of me felt like they shouldn’t have brought her in on the Shu Han side quest because she did so little there. She just felt like another body. Which she didn’t deserve.

The ending. Was so much and so much change that I have mixed feelings about. But props on them for taking the initiative to change that much.

Alina’s ending. I’m glad she didn’t have to lose her powers. While the epilogue with her running her fingers through sunlight she cannot bend is heartbreakingly good, I always disliked that ending for her. She deserved more than just a powerless domestic life because she wanted more. Yes she wanted to be able to be with Mal and be free, and I want that for her, but it shouldn’t have been at the cost of her powers.

Mal becoming a privateer is. I’m unsure of how I feel about it right now. It feels odd, because Mal has always said he only wants a calm life with Alina. But I get why they’re giving him this open ending, so they can continue. Which, by the last scene, they obviously plan to continue the SaB side of things into a King of Scars type story.

Nikolai’s ending. I am SO glad they went ahead and showed signs of his demon side. It honestly was good that they didn’t have him turn earlier in the season, because it would have felt cramped with everything else, especially when we just met him.

I do think Alina and Nikolai continuing the engagement is weird though. Why would they do that? How will it affect any possible future next season, especially if they’re going in KoS territory, with Zoyalai?

Six of Crows

Starting with the positives here: Nina CARRIED the crows this season. She was perfect. Annoyed with Kaz from the start. EXCELLENT with Inej and with Jesper a bit.

Similarly, the Helnik was perfect and heartbreaking. Just the right pacing even with the changes. They broke me. And the last scene of them actually killed me, I think.

For episodes 1&2 all I could think about with Wylan was how well they were capturing him. Just the right amount of genuine kindness and naïveté and snark.

I liked how they upped the violence for the crows. Everyone got to get a hit in. Kaz was a great step up in ruthlessness. Inej grew, and Nina actually got to use her powers effectively. And Wylan got some good shots in.

Episode 4 really threw me off with the crows though. I cannot believe that they added a scene from the last 100 pages of Crooked Kingdom to this season. Before the Ice Court. Kaz finishing off Pekka is the end of his arc. How on earth are they going to have him do the actions that it takes to get through the Ice Court Heist if he isn’t working to gain power and tear down Rollins?

Obviously they’re setting up Rollins to come back and be a threat again but how will that work?? He knows who Nina is. The CK heist hinges on Van Eck and Rollins not knowing who Nina is.

Wesper getting together actually made me feel dread as I watched it. I view the show and books as very separate, that’s how I enjoy them, but I couldn’t wrap my head around how they thought this was a good idea beyond fan service. Having Wesper together right off the bat ruins both of their character arcs. If they’re together before their growth, none of it means anything. Even in the show, to make it work, they had to fast track two very important reveals for them.

I was fine with Jesper’s Durast powers being revealed this season. I even expected it. I thought Inej and Kaz would find out, or say they knew this season. And maybe Jesper would use his powers in secret. But no. Everyone knew by the end of the season, and he barreled through self acceptance in like 3 episodes. WITHOUT A SINGLE COLM APPEARANCE. Do you get how bad that is?? Colm is integral to Jesper’s shame, and he didn’t even show up, and though I like the scene with his mom in theory, how will Jesper and Colm have any good tension now? How will SoC and CK even work if Jesper has already solved the biggest source of his self esteem issues AND his gambling problem?

Which, by the way, insanely weird his addiction didn’t really come up this season. It was mentioned once or twice but really had no effect on his character. Which. Addiction doesn’t turn on and off.

Wylan’s illiteracy came out way too soon as well. He didn’t really get a chance to prove himself before Jesper found out, which. I can’t even articulate now why I hate that so much. I’ll have to make a separate post.

Back to Wesper speedrun. We can’t have so many critical Wesper scenes because of this. No “not just girls”. No Kuwei kiss, unless it’s a huge stretch in miscommunication when they’re already dating. No “I was paying attention” when Genya tailors Wylan because of course it’s not a surprise he knows his face if they’re dating.

Another one of my favorite scenes that won’t work now: The Kaz and Jesper Big Fight. Jesper knows who Jordie is already. It loses all tension.

Inej’s ending also really bothered me. Her having freedom and starting her hunt for slavers BEFORE the Ice Court? I genuinely don’t see how they can make the ICH work at this point. How will these characters ever come back together? Why would Inej come back? Just because Jurda Parem was an issue? Because if so, I feel they’ll be leaning too much into the Crows being pawns of the crown, which ultimately destroys their purpose. They aren’t chosen ones in ANY CAPACITY. Yes, Inej may do things for more moral reasons, but in the end she doesn’t work for the crown. Because of how they treat the Suli, especially.

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siscertglobal · 2 months

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#soc 2 certification #soc 3 certification #sis certifications #soc certification #soc 2 type 2 report #soc 2 type 1 #iso certification #soc certification reports

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alexistalkingsstuff · 5 months

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Everybody Wants To Rule The World- Tears for fears.

Today I will be relating this song to six of crows.

"Most for freedom" - this part being about Inej because she wants to have freedom more than anything. Matthias because during soc he just basically wants to get the fuck out of there and be a Druskelle again (obviously his motives change throughout the books) Wylan who wants to run away from his father. Nina to 1. Break Matthias out of hellgate. 2. To go back to Ravka. Jesper to be free of debt and guilt.

"And of pleasure." Kaz is a money whore.

"Nothing ever lasts forever," - chapter 40. They were all supposed to make it. But as much as they all wanted to believe they are not invincible.

" Everybody wants to rule the world." - In Ketterdam a lot of the time people's main motivation is power. Jan Van Eck wants to maintain his wealthy lifestyle while using a drug that basically kills Grisha and is almost like torture but he doesn't give a fuck about the people he hurts because he wants to be richer and why would he care about people's lives when the cause of their death, jurda parem, is mostly benefiting him. Pekka Rollins wanting to be the boss of the barrel even if that means preying on innocent children and their naivety.

"There's a room where the light won't find you,

Holding hands while the walls come tumbling down,"- This part being about how loyal the crows are to each other and how they each find love within this group both types too. They find platonic love with the fact they all have a strong bond. They also find romantic love within their pairings. (Kanej, Helnik and Wesper.) This part could also be about the ending in which Kaz and Inej hold hands without armour and the "walls tumbling down" are the walls Kaz has put up to protect not only himself but Inej too. But he ends up breaking down those walls just for her as she holds his hand through it. (Literally and metaphorically.)

"When they do I'll be right behind you," -Again the loyalty within the group.

"So glad we've almost made it," - They didn't all make it however the ones who did are glad they did so they can experience life past this point.

"So sad they had to fade it,"- This might be just me but I feel like the crows won't be known as legends like Alina Starkov. Of course Inej will be known for her work of hunting slavers and being the total badass she is. And Wylan known for being a member of the merchant council. Jesper is reading assistant and partner and helping run the Van Eck business. Nina as a Grisha soldier (I haven't finished reading RoW yet so I don't fully know Nina's ending yet). Kaz of course is famous as dirtyhands and bastard of the barrel running a criminal empire. And Matthias will sadly be known as a traitor to the Druskelle. But they won't be known as "The Crows" the ones who broke into the ice court at least not by the public. And the fact that they were criminals and also a lot of them were considered "barrel rats" probably doesn't help because history is always written by powerful people and they would be able to twist the story however they like. Idk this might just be by personal opinion on the legacy of the crows.

#leigh bardugo #no mourners no funerals #six of crows #the grisha trilogy #amita suman #grishaverse #sab #kaz brekker #matthias helvar #jesper fahey #wylan van eck #wesper #helnik #kanej #lyrics #inej ghafa #nina zenik

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blueopinions49 · 1 year

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Understanding Type 1

An intro to enneagram 1

Barbara Howard (Abbott Elementary) ESTJ 1w9 sp/so

Core Desire (Purity)-They desire the perfect ideal of morality. This deep desire to be clean of any moral impurity

Vice (Resentment)- The believe that others dont deserve what they have due to not reaching the standard they have set for themselves.

Fixation (Wrath)- They internalize their rage and redirect it to “perfect themselves” and others due to seeing the world through an acceptable and unacceptable lens.

Wings

1w9 (The Idealist)- They focus on their own sense of morality without the relation to the other. Due to the w9 this type is more reserved from reality and interested on its own understanding and interpretation of morality. Unlike the 1w2 who are open with their anger 1w9s repress it in order to find peace within itself. The 1w9 is incredibly impersonal when it comes to morality and often cuts others while the 1w2 will be more interpersonal and open with others.

1w2 -(The Advocate)- The 1w2 focuses their anger into perfecting others and creating a safe space for others. With the 2 wing they look to foster others emotionally and focuses on polishing others morally. They will find ways to make their own moral agenda about the others unlike the 1w9 who makes it about the self. Will focus on the interpersonal aspects of morality and will not have trouble being emotionally expressive unlike the 1w9.

Triads- Gut (8-9-1)

They repress their wrath in order to maintain a whats right and correct ideal. They do this by creating boundaries for themselves and others.

Harmonic Triad- Competency (1-3-5)

They get results by being strict with themselves and others. Refusing to ever cut corners in capacity.

Hornevian Triad- Super Ego (1-2-6)

Their needs are met through looking for moral stability and justice.

Object Relations- Frustration (1-4-7)

An emotional frustration when it comes to attaching themselves to others so they take a “motherly’ role and work as a beacon to light others way in life.

Subtypes

Social (so)- The social 1 sees themselves as this prophet that brings goodness and morality to the world. They bring attention to everything that is good, right and just. They look to “teach” others how to be a good person through their understanding of morality. They see themselves as righteous and just; often they look to corrects others behavior and due to being a super ego type they see it as rational to perfect others. They believe themselves to be morally superiors to others. Unlikely to be mistyped however they are often seen as E5.

Ex-Captain America (Marvel Comics) ISFJ 1w2 so/sp, Light Yagami (Death Note) ENTJ 1w2 so/sx and Katara (ATLA) ESFJ 1w2 so/sp

Sexual (sx)- As the counter type of 1 this subtype doesnt withhold their anger and rather channels it into benefiting others. Due to their interested relying on interpersonal relationships they'll look to reform others and polish those who are close to them. They express their anger in a more direct manner compared to the soc one who withholds it from others. While the sx and soc one sound similar the soc 1 will focus on the grand and bast of moral reform unlike the sx 1 who will focus on the interpersonal aspect of reform. They may look like E8 due to their comfort in expressing their anger.

Ex-Ronald “Mac” Mcdonald (IASIP) ESFJ 1w2 sx/so, Bruce Wayne (DC COMICS) INTJ 1w9 sx/so and Omni Man (Invencible) ESTJ 1w9 sx/so

Self-Preservation (sp)-The self-preservation 1 focuses on the morality of the self. If the soc 1 chastises groups and others to perfect them and sx 1 focuses on the moral then the sp 1 focuses on the chastity of the self. This subtype is hyper critical over the self and internalize their anger to perfect themselves and rid themselves of their own wickedness. Unlike the soc and sx 1 they are more on the introverted side and is incredibly anxious about their anger and rarely if ever expresses it. Due to this they can look like E6s.

Ex- Kikyo (Inuyasha) INFJ 1w9 sp/so, Alicent Hightower ESFJ 1w2 sp/so and Jill Valentine (Resident Evil) ISTJ 1w9 sp/sx

Movements (Positive and Negative)

Move to 7

Positive: The rigidness they find comfort in is gone and they become more flexible and enthusiastic.

Negative: Becomes hyper critical over the self to the point of self loathing.

1 MOVES TO 4

Positive: Will slow down to take time to process more complex emotions.

Negative: They lose touch their true self and become angry and emotionally reactive to anything and everything thats around them.

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dawn-likes-cigarettes · 22 days

Text

{Dawn Wilson Information}

My name is Dawn Wilson. I’m 18 years old and I’ve lived in Tulsa, Oklahoma my whole life. I’m a drug addict, which I wish I could change but I can’t help it… I occasionally drink and I live with my brother with his wife and kid.

OOC: GOT INSPIRATION FROM @s0dap0p-curt1s :3 I made this for fun to have more information lol 🐭1. {Basics} 2. {Appearance} 3. {Personality} 4. {Relationships} 5. {Interests} 6. {Background} 7. {RP information}

☆*:.｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆

☆Full name: Dawn Holly Wilson ⁃ {Nicknames} ⁃ Dusk; it’s the opposite of Dawn lol ⁃ Hollandaise sauce; her middle name ⁃ Kid; cause of her height ⁃ Little sis; by Austin ⁃ Pretty little grease; by male socs ⁃ Whore/slut/hoe; by female socs ⁃ Drunk/smoker; by little kids that have terrible parents (cause they don’t pay attention to their kids) ☆Age: 18 years old ⁃ {Birthday}: June 5, 1949 ⁃ {Zodiac}: Gemini ☆Gender: Cis Female ⁃ {Species}: Drug addicted human

☆Sexual Orientation: Lesbian ☆Nationality: American, German background ☆Ethnicity: American German ☆Hometown: Tulsa, Oklahoma: North side

☆*:.｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆

☆Occupation: Waitress; does not pay well so her brother gives her money

☆Religion: unreligious; parents are Jewish-Germans ☆Languages: ⁃ English ⁃ Some German, but barely

☆*:.｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆

☆Height: 5’4” ☆Weight: 95 lbs ☆Body type: petite, curvy

☆Skin: ⁃ {Texture}: soft, a little dirty ⁃ {Tone}: tan ☆Hair: ⁃ {Color}: golden blond ⁃ {Length}: middle-back length ⁃ {Style}: always down but swept to the side

☆Eyes: ⁃ {Shape}: Doe ⁃ {Color}: light light blue ☆Scars: ⁃ Not a lot of scars ⁃ Practically scratches now ⁃ Cigarette burns on her thighs ☆Piercings: two piercings each on both ears ☆Accessories: ⁃ bracelets ⁃ Rag outside her back pocket ⁃ Usually wears a headband when she’s feeling pretty 😋

☆Clothing style: Dirty (dirt and grease dirty) casual

☆*:.｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆

☆No drugs personality: ⁃ mean, quiet, compulsive liar, a bitch, cranky, hateful, stubborn, isn’t toxic or abusive, dramatic, suicidal ☆With drugs personality: ⁃ nice, loud, childish, still a bitch but a bad bitch, stubborn, happy, positive, dramatic

☆Positive traits: street smart and positive ☆Negative traits: stubborn, forgetful, and cranky, suicidal

☆*:.｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆

☆Habits: ⁃ Extremely hard drug user ⁃ Constantly getting hurt physically ⁃ Very addictive smoker ⁃ {tw; self harm} Cutting self ☆Pet Peeves: ⁃ extremely rude ⁃ Toxic relationships ⁃ Ignorance

☆*:.｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆

☆Usual first impression: ⁃ nasty drunk but is actually a smoker ⁃ Mean and carefree ⁃ Disrespectful ☆Fears: ⁃ fear of losing family ⁃ fear of boredom ⁃ fear of old men ⁃ fear of dying too young ⁃ fear of being forgotten (OOC: same)

☆*:.｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆

☆Mother: Martha A. James ☆Father: Unknown

☆Siblings: ⁃ {Brother}: Austin K. Wilson ⁃ {Sister-in-Law}: Jazzlynn K. Wilson ☆Niece: ⁃ Marygold E. Wilson

☆Grandparents: ⁃ Thomas F. James ⁃ Cleo H. James

☆Friends: ⁃ Ponyboy Curtis (only met once and now Pony thinks they’re best friends. Wtf bruh)

☆Lover: ⁃ no one yet, does have a crush on a girl named Callie Collidge (eh eh, see the reference hehe)

☆*:.｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆

☆Likes: ⁃ smoking ⁃ Teasing ⁃ Cookies ⁃ Flowers ⁃ Self control (but she herself cannot do that…) ⁃ Parties ⁃ Compliments ☆Dislikes: ⁃ Quiet rooms ⁃ Leprechauns (Staar…) ⁃ Calming environments ⁃ Reading ⁃ Church (it’s boring to her since she’s not religious)

☆Hobbies: ⁃ {Music}: Rock, Metal, loud, head-banging music ⁃ Shoplifting ⁃ Pretending to be a cowgirl ⁃ Smoking ⁃ Dancing aggressively

☆Talents: ⁃ can surprising make extremely good food ⁃ Being a bad bitch ⁃ Can get high and after 2 hours, is back to normal

☆Skills: ⁃ Fights ⁃ Shoplifting ⁃ Flirting ⁃ Getting burned and not caring; high pain tolerance

☆*:.｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆

☆Favorite people: ⁃ Austin Wilson ⁃ Jazzlynn Wilson ⁃ Marygold Wilson ⁃ Jibril Wa’el (thinks of him kinda like a father figure :3) ⁃ Staar (only cause they are a hilarious duo) ☆Least favorite people: ⁃ Launcey Williams (only cause she’s kinda rude) ⁃ Dallas Winston (he’s annoying) ⁃ Curly Shepard (same as Dally) ⁃ Tim Shepard (he’s like an old man)

☆Tolerable people: ⁃ Angela Shepard (she’s okay just judgmental towards EVERYTHING) ⁃ Johnny Cade ⁃ TwoBit Mathews ⁃ Steve Randle

☆*:.｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆

☆Background: ⁃ {childhood}: ⁃ She was constantly bullied for being fatherless. ⁃ Of course Austin was a butthead as a kid as well, being 16 when she was 6. ⁃ Their mother was a drunk and constantly had panic attacks. ⁃ {most of teenage life} ⁃ Same bullying but their mother went into a coma, leaving Austin as the “parent” of the house. ☆*:.｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆

☆RP Information: ⁃ {is it open?} ⁃ Yes!! It’s always open!! ⁃ {what am I comfortable?} ⁃ I am comfortable with nsfw, sfw, agere, petre, anything as long as it’s not pedo, rape, or anything like that. (I also do angst.)

OOC: Hello it’s @i-like-ratsssss !!!! Hope this give enough information, it definitely did for me so I can go back to this and see what to tell people 😭

#the outsiders #the outsiders oc #information

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beautifulpersonpeach · 1 year

Note

Hi BPP,

You must have seen the solo versus OT7 drama that’s been happening on Twitter or seen discussions relating to this on Tumblr. I’d like you to weigh in with your opinion on this.

To those fans who are new to this fandom, say post hiatus or just slightly pre hiatus, this could seem to be very toxic; although, it could be these same new fans who are pushing back 💁🏻‍♀️

Ultimately, the BTS anti wins - seeing a solid fandom crumble in this manner. It seems as though some of these OT7s are Sacrificing Jimin to make a point.

I hope though that Jimin does make the sales he needs and has the impact we think he shall have and that antis don’t win at pulling him down.

***

Hi Anon,

Oh I saw it. Not on Tumblr (I’m yet to see any of those discussions here thank goodness), but definitely on Twitter.

This is one of those situations that causes me to rub my temples because it reveals stupidity everywhere, like tech bros inducing a global banking collapse-type stupid, and there’s plenty of blame to go around. But these exact sort of situations are what’s expected to happen given how the fandom has changed since 2020, and it’s why the byline of my blog references a fandom implosion. Because it’s coming. It just has to. Lol.

I referenced 2020 for a reason. This isn’t the first time the fandom has had to navigate supporting solo work. We’ve done it in 2015, 2016, and 2020, but because of how the fandom has changed since 2020, conflict and implosion is nearly guaranteed.

Many things changed in the fandom in 2020, but one major thing that happened is we had a huge influx of k-pop noobs into the fandom. We all know many of these people happened to be from Western/European countries and typically skewed female, white, and opinionated. According to that ARMY soc med survey, these people now account for roughly 50% of the fandom, and I reckon roughly the same amount found their way into solo stan and shipper spaces. Most of these people aren’t bad in any real sense, but what I’ve observed is they lack the history to have an understanding of the 2nd and 3rd order implications of certain actions within a k-pop space. This is something solo stans are notorious for, for example not understanding the 2nd order implications of sending a truck to HYBE claiming HYBE is mistreating your favourite member, or the 3rd order consequences of trending hashtags to make a point, as another example. Ordered thinking can be intuitive to some people, but to most people they need to have experienced a history that shows what happens 2 or 3 steps down the line when you’re only concerned with the immediate reward, forgetting that nothing in k-pop happens in a vacuum.

Anyway, I’ll say what I think on each player in the drama yesterday.

The Solo Stans

Pre-2020, solo stans would have had the sense to not even make that request to ARMYs in the first place. That was their first mistake. Those funds would have eventually made it into ARMY buying channels (because ARMYs have the widest and most efficient systems for chart placements, solo stans do not, despite their enthusiasm), but no solo stan in their right mind would blatantly publicly request ARMY participation - it would’ve moved through DMs or solos creating ARMY cosplay accounts for that purpose. Pre-2020.

You might be wondering, what’s the damage? What’s the big deal in just telling ARMYs there’s 10 grand sitting somewhere that they can request? Shouldn’t we all put aside our ego to support Jimin?

Lol.

The thing is, Solo stans are fundamentally different from ARMYs in that they view the other members as rivals that must be defeated (1). ARMYs are inclined to support any member who needs it. And so, many solo stans simply do not trust ARMYs to spend the funds only on Jimin. And they’re right to have that fear. Most ARMYs obviously would use it for Jimin and what I’ve seen is trusted ARMY buyers and funders are responsible and provide thorough accounts of their activities, but it would be stupid to ignore that hyung-line diet solos, shippers (aka taekookers), etc, would take advantage as well. PJMs were only setting themselves up for grief by doing what they did.

Another reason it was plain moronic to publicly and blatantly announce the funds available and demand ARMY partnership with solos, is that it would set the precedent for Taehyung and Jungkook solo stans during their debuts. And I promise you, $10,000 will only be the starting amount. PJMs didn’t think beyond putting that amount of money to work, forgetting that they’ve now created a situation that demands ARMY working with taekook solos to the tune of $50,000 at least (that’s the amount I recall seeing by their fanbase in 2021 earmarked for their debuts). Nobody was paying closer attention to that drama yesterday, than other akgaes and antis. There's a lot of eyes on the fandom. PJMs, bless their heart, are often just loud, uncouth, and myopic in their thinking.

Because:

At the end of the day that money isn’t going to be sitting somewhere idle. It will definitely be spent on Jimin during his debut. Solo stans of previous eras would have had the sense to privately approach ARMY buyers and use the rest of those funds (because of course most of it will be used to get Jimin’s high chart placements in the 1st week), to support the release from week 3 which is when streams/radio typically fall off, supporting the efforts from the core of the fandom, to give Jimin’s tracks more longevity, and stronger support - a better indicator for a song’s success on the charts. But the only thinking present here yesterday was to get as many 1st week buyers with those funds to make the biggest splash as possible at debut.

The ARMYs

As I’ve said before, too many ARMYs are just plain stupid. It’s not an insult, just the facts of the matter I’m afraid. Going by how ARMY typically operates, over the course of this week (week of the release), ARMYs would have raised well over $10,000. Obviously. It’s not something the fandom typically advertises (another key difference between ARMY and solos), but anyone who has worked within these channels would tell you a lot of money gets generated in a very short amount of time and there’s a literal army of buyers in those networks. For pre-2020 ARMYs, it would’ve been enough to say, “we’re good supporting Jimin, thanks.” And blocked the solo stans right away because they’d kick up a stink the moment you actually engaged with them and lead to the exact same situation that happened yesterday. It’s the same playbook to use with taekook shippers. But that’s not what happened, which again, is another key difference between how pre-2020 ARMYs would’ve handled this vs. newer ARMYs.

ARMYs are generally wary of working extensively with solo stans because of (1) above, as it guarantees that solos will weaponize any and all achievements to tear down the other members. As an ARMY (who could bias any member) it makes zero sense to work with anyone who literally actually wants to see another member leave the group, using any solo success over their bandmates as reasons that member should do so. A second reason is that solo stans often belong to rival fandoms a.k.a. Blinks, NCTzens, Shawols, Exols, etc. and the unfortunate reality of what goes down in k-pop fandoms is that people’s lives can get ruined over pointless shit. An Egyptian ARMY who is a dental student in Egypt, was doxxed by Blinks four days ago for saying Yoongi dances better than Jennie. She’s had her living address, family address, faculty information, and medical conditions leaked by Blinks on Twitter. And one traced the leak to providing her information for a BlackPink album giveaway last year. We can joke about how these online fights are silly but ARMYs have seen enough to have more reasons against working with solos and akgaes, than they do to work with them.

It’s frankly not really about ego. It involves money and personal information and there’s real risk here.

Now, why did I say ARMYs are stupid? Because they opened an avenue to have this discussions publicly in the first place. Nothing good comes from hashing things out on the TL (there's too many eyes on the fandom), much less an issue as nuanced as this and even more so when ARMYs had already worked with Hobi and other member funding bases before on previous releases. (But on significantly smaller amounts and not directly through the largest ARMY funding bases.)

It’s not easy to explain all that in a tweet, and I doubt a lot of newer ARMYs even understand the real issues - I suspect many of them just move in a herd and think “solos bad” without fully understanding why it’s a bad idea to approach things the way solos suggested yesterday - so those ARMYs instead used nonsensical arguments like bringing up the Hanbok issue in early 2021, that solos want to take ‘credit’, and the ARMYs who have nowhere to tuck in their insecurities as it concerns Jimin (because there are definitely ARMYs - usually hyung-line and other maknae-line biases - who are extremely sensitive to any mention of how Jimin differs from the rest) let it all hang out yesterday.

Pre-2020, ARMYs would have shut down that argument on the TL as soon as it happened (and that’s if it would’ve happened in the first place), blocking solo stans which would’ve caused (pre-2020) solos to make cosplay accounts and deal with this all in DMs. It’s easier to develop trust and hold accounts accountable (lol) one on one. That’s one way the fandom did this in 2015 with Joon’s solo, in 2016 with Jimin’s Lie and other solos, and in 2020 (although for BE, solo stans tried to sabotage that release by boycotting the album… but like I said, these sort of changes started in 2020).

The Exiles

I describe the Exiles as those within the fandom who think they’re not in the fandom. We’ve all seen them, in fact I suspect some of my followers are them - they’re people who constantly think the fandom makes them ‘look bad’ and so they don’t want to be associated with its label. Many of them are sympathetic to solo stan arguments though they wouldn’t call themselves solo stans and could even despise solos for the same reason they hate ARMYs. But at the end of the day, the Exiles still play a role. Because of course they do. Most of the Exiles today also joined the fandom around 2020, and many of them haven’t ever really participated fully in supporting a release, and so they don’t have a real understanding of what goes down, and why it’s a bad idea to do exactly what Jimin’s solos were publicly requesting yesterday. But these types are often very opinionated and just fanned the flames yesterday lmao. But the plus side is this group of people will end up being the bridge when D-day arrives. It’s what I saw happen with Hobi-biased people who don’t consider themselves part of ARMY, for On The Street.

The Takeaway

Consider that mess the dress rehearsal for Taehyung and Jungkook’s solo debut, and we have PJMs to thank for that. Taekook solos would have demanded ARMYs support either way, but now they have additional ammo thanks to PJMs and they’re significantly more in number than any other member’s solo stans. More vicious too. And the core of the fandom will be in worse shape by their debut in the sense that it will be more fragmented because I’m sure yesterday’s mess left a nasty dent on some more impressionable people. These kinds of things are bound to happen given the players that have become dominant in the fandom in the last three years. What I suggest is focusing on the small pockets of followers and friends within the fandom that you know and trust - whether you’re a solo stan, ARMY, or Exile. If you’ve never participated in buying/funding, ask those people questions. Get into the habit of streaming on multiple platforms, and for God’s sake learn how to resolve shit in the DMs.

Jimin will have a lot of competition on March 17th and 24th. The deck is already stacked against him. And maybe I’m weird but all that does is make me excited because whenever things are like this for Jimin, he just… he blows it all out of the water. Contrary to popular belief, most people in the fandom, whether they bias Jimin or not, actually love him. It’s impossible not to. And they will give this release everything they’ve got. I’m already seeing it happening, ARMYs just don’t advertise it publicly because all eyes, including journalists, are on the fandom. Focus on what you can control, find a group of people who love him as much as you do, and enjoy the music when it comes.

#jimin #park jimin #bts army #bts fandom #fandom behaviour #kpop

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loser-female · 5 months

Text

The job of a SOC Analyst

The #1 thing people ask me about is what I do for a job.

I'm a tier 1 SOC Analyst and I'm currently training to do some Cyber Threat Intelligence.

I will explain in detail what I do on a daily basis and why I've decided to do this job... And the negatives.

First of all, what's a SOC. SOC stands for "security operations center". It's a place (in my case virtual as I'm full remote) where a group of people, divided by experience and area of expertise, do the following:

Monitor the activities going on the customer's network or endpoints(= every device connected to the network);

Assess and mitigate alerts coming from the network and/or the endpoint of the client -> These tools send alerts that need to be evaluated and mitigated/responded in a certain amount of time (it depends on the SOC and the type of alert, generally I can assume an amount of time from 15 to 30 minutes per alert. Which is not that much;

Investigate cybersecurity incidents -> the SOC also analyses the kind of "incident" that happens in deep detail by analysing malware, spam emails, the behaviour of users and so on;

If the SOC is big/mature enough there could be some sort of prevention of cybersecurity issues, generally we talk about threat hunting (here for more information on that) and cyber threat intelligence (gathering information from various sources to produce a report about the potential attackers considering also the characteristic of the customer's company such as the size, the geographical area of operations, media exposure, geopolitical issues and what they do - doing this for a bank is different than doing it for a industry)

There are also other functions (such as we have a Security Architect that prepares a personalised solution for each client).

I know what you're thinking. But the AI...

No, they cannot do my job, as the ability of a human to notice patterns and correlate the information among various sources is unique. I memorised, with time, the usual activities my customers do, therefore I can interpret the user actions even with limited sources. And this is just one example.

Soc analysts are roughly divided in three "categories", always keep in mind that every SOC is different and has its own internal rules, that are not to be divulged. This is the rough division I've learned studying cybersecurity and NOT my organisation division.

Tier 1 Analysts are the one that monitors the traffic and activities I've mentioned before. They triage the alerts and if something deserves more investigation or can be discarded. They often perform simple actions of remediation of incidents.

Tier 2 Analysts are the ones that go deeper - they collect malware samples from the incident and analyse it, investigate and remediate more complex security incidents.

Tier 3 Analysts perform more active prevention duties like threat hunting and vulnerability assessments.

Some sources put intelligence activity on the tier 3, others consider it a different activity from the scenario I've described. If a SOC is big enough they might have their own intelligence team separated from the "regular" soc analysts. The rigidity of these roles can vary, as you probably got from my own duties.

On the top we have a SOC manager to coordinate the activities I've described and security architects that design the solution (although the deployment of these solutions can be delegated to the analysts, since we also have to monitor how well these perform).

All these people are usually referred as "blue teamers" btw, which are the ones that perform defensive actions.

A company can have a red team (basically they attack the customer to gain information that the blue team will use to improve their activities). I actually wanted to be a red teamer at first, since it's considered the "cooler" job.

Ok, got it. Now explain to me how you got there since I've never heard anything about this before.

I have a friend that's a system engineer and recommended this job to me.

I studies physics at university but I failed (in my country physics include some computer science classes btw) and I had some related experience I won't share for privacy reasons. No I'm not a criminal lol.

I then started studying - did a bootcamp and got a couple of certifications. Then I got my job.

However. Generally you get a degree in computer science or software engineering, and some universities offer cybersecurity degrees. Unfortunately I cannot tell you what to pick as every university has its own program and I cannot help you with that.

Certifications are a big part of my job unfortunately - mostly because due to how fast it goes you absolutely need to be "on top". It's annoying, yes, I hate it.

However. Consider that once you're hired you definitely will get them paid by your employer - at least in Europe this is on them(idk about the US), but you need some knowledge of cybersecurity to start.

Since some of them are stupid expensive I 100% recommend the compTIA ones. They're basics and respected worldwide. A+, Network+ and Security+ are basics, vendor neutral (which doesn't tie you to a particular "source", as every company works differently), and is relatively cheap (~300€).

Remember that I had previous experience so no one cares that I don't have a degree - I do however and I hope that in the future I will be able to "fix" this.

Great. How do I know if I'm good for this job?

This is on you. However:

One important thing if you don't live in an English speaking country is a good attitude towards foreign languages. I speak 5 for example, but it's an hobby I do since I was a teen;

Can you manage stress? A SOC is a fast paced environment, and you have a limited time to deal with whatever gets thrown at you. You have 15 to 30 minutes to deal with an alert and make a decision. Can you do that without panicking, crying or throwing a tantrum?

Are you a fast learner? You need to learn quickly how to do things, since the tools we use are quite complicated.

Are you willing to work on shifts, Saturdays, Sundays, festivities included? A lot of people can't cope with this and it's fine because it's a massacre. The job is so stressful to the point a lot of people leave cybersecurity because of it. Do not underestimate it, please.

How good are you at remembering random information and making correlations? Because I can remember random bits of information that no one ever thinks of it and it's one of my greatest strengths.

You need to do teamwork and be good with people, customers and so on - you have to explain complicated things you probably read in another language to people that don't know anything about what you do. It's more difficult than most people think.

Procedures are everything here - and for good reasons.

I think this is it.

Money.

USA avg salary: 74 307$ (Glassdoor)

France avg salary: 42 000€ (Glassdoor)

UK avg salary: 28 809 £ (Glassdoor)

There are random numbers I've found online(and with a lot of discrepancies). Consider that you MUST negotiate your salary, and that in certain places you get paid more if you work out of the usual 8-19 work shift. Obv since I live in a different place I cannot tell you if it's worth it - you do your own calculations.

But that's beyond the purpose of this post.

#ada.txt #cybersecurity #resources

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