#somehow ​edgar is one of my favorite characters to draw ever.. something about him is very fun <3

[rhinoyo]

his majesty?!?!?!?!

[lupinlongbottom]

Burning Bridges pt. 2

Neville Longbottom x Reader

Summary: First day of school! First day of fighting! Wait what? Neville convinces (Y/N) to chat with him, explain what had been going on for the last five years. It’s not much, but it’s a start.

Word Count: 3.3k

Warnings: some swearing, angst if you squint idk

A/N: i’m not good at angst. i’m also not good at plot? dunno. trying hard, my dudes. i have like, 6 plot points i want to hit but this chapter hits none of them. filler? idk. angst? who’s to say? enjoy!

Part 1 ... Part 3 ... Part 4 ... Part 5 ... Part 6 ... Part 7

__

It had taken nearly all day to get her classroom in order. McGonagall wasn’t joking, the previous Potions Master, Atticus Barclay, was a bit of a hoarder and a terribly messy one at that. To (Y/N)’s knowledge, Slughorn had retired only a year after the Battle of Hogwarts, leaving a rather necessary spot to be filled quickly. Not exactly the wisest choice, she noted. (Y/N) finished dusting the final shelf, turning the label on the fluxweed jar outward.

“Atticus you swine,” (Y/N) groaned, stretching her back. “Honestly, any worthwhile Potions Master would’ve taken much better care of their workspace…”

She took a step back, admiring her handiwork. No more did the dungeon feel like it had in her school years. (Y/N) had opened the curtains, allowing the little bit of sunlight to filter in. A few waves of her wand allowed ivy to grow, following the curvature of the ceiling, dangling ever so slightly. Felt homey. Inviting. A barn owl rested on (Y/N)’s shoulder, nuzzling her face slightly.

“Hello, Edgar,” She smiled, petting him gently. “You like the place? Seems more my style, no?”

The barn owl sputtered a response, flying over to the window.

“I know you want to go fly, but I haven’t got any letters to send,” (Y/N) sighed. “As usual. You can make laps around the castle, right?” 

Edgar’s black eyes bore into (Y/N)’s, almost as if he was cross. No, (Y/N) decided. Her owl, best friend, was cross.  

“If you want me to send a letter so bad, I could convince myself to send mum one. I know how much you love flying through Bristol to get to her,” Edgar stood silent. “Right. I’ll think about it,” (Y/N) turned to her owl. “Maybe I should cast a warming charm in the winter…”

-

“(Y/N)!” Neville smiled, practically running into the Potions classroom. He sat down next to (Y/N). “Got here early, as usual it seems.”

(Y/N) grinned widely at her friend. “Never late, to Potions at least. I want to pass my O.W.L’s somehow.”

“If anyone had to worry about not passing their Potions O.W.L, it wouldn’t be you,” Neville laughed.

“You flatter me, Longbottom,” said (Y/N), watching a wisp of her breath escape her lips. “You’d think Snape would put a warming charm on this room when snow’s on the ground, right?” She rubbed her arm slowly, trying to warm up.

“You’re cold?” Neville’s eyes widened. “You should’ve worn your cardigan! I tell you that every time we have class.”

“You know I like the look of vests much better,” (Y/N) teased, moving her hand to her nose, pinching it lightly. “Besides, someone jinxed my jumpers. Shrink every time I touch them.”

“Again?” Neville brought his voice to a whisper. “You’ve got to stop letting them bully you like that…”

“You’re one to talk!” (Y/N) quipped, giggling slightly. “I tried enchanting my chest to keep them out, but maybe I need to try something different.”

“In any case,” Neville stood up, walking behind (Y/N). “You should at least be warm in your favorite class.” Suddenly, (Y/N) felt a slight weight on her shoulders. Intrigued, she glanced down to see a familiar gray cardigan. Gryffindor cardigan. Neville sat back down, sans jumper, his cheeks dusted pink. From the cold, of course.

“Snape’s going to dock at least 10 points from Gryffindor when he sees you not wearing the proper uniform,” (Y/N) said, fighting back the biggest smile from her face.

“It’ll be like any other class, then,” Neville shrugged, moving to fix the jumper now atop of (Y/N)’s shoulders, wearing it like a cape. “Y-you can keep it, if you want.”

“What? No, I can’t keep it! It’s—”

“Keep it until you can un-jinx your jumpers. It’s bloody freezing.” 

-

“On second thought… the cold builds character.”

__

It had only taken three outfit changes for (Y/N) to finally settle on a pair of matching robes and a hat, mauve in color. They were once her mother’s, passed down in hopes (Y/N) would make better use of it at Hogwarts. 

“I guess she’s right,” (Y/N) hummed, readjusting her hat. “Don’t you think I look just ghastly in hats?” Her head turned to the barn owl, sitting on his perch adjacent to the full length mirror. The owl cooed. “Exactly right. I do look like my grandmother. Always the observatory owl, Edgar,” (Y/N) glanced at the clock. “Shit! I’m going to be late!”

Flying out the door, (Y/N) hardly had the moment to recognize the figure exiting his door as well. The two collided, knocking both parties to the ground.

“I’m so sorry!” (Y/N) blurted, grabbing the wall to steady herself upward. “Are you alright?” 

“Been better,” Neville groaned, rubbing his forehead.

“Oh, Professor Longbottom,” (Y/N) readjusted her robe, reluctantly offering her hand.

“Thanks,” Neville forced a smile, his lips drawing a fine line. He took her hand, fingers lingering for a moment too long. He pulled away at the realization. “Running late?” 

“Old habits,” she shrugged. “I see you’re not exactly punctual tonight either.”

“Gran sent me an owl, had to reply before I forgot,” said Neville, smiling at the thought. “Wished me luck on my first day.”

“That’s sweet of her, how is she—” (Y/N) stopped herself, coughing lightly. “Well, by any means it’s not wise for the two newest professors to be late on the first night.” 

“Of course not, that’d be barbaric. I doubt McGonagall would let us hear the end of it,” He laughed, expecting a response. Nothing. “Is that your hat?” Neville pointed to the mauve pile to the left of her.

(Y/N) glanced downward. “So it is,” She gently leaned down to retrieve it, placing it again on her head. “Is it on straight?”

“Isn’t it a circle? How could it be on straight? Is there a wrong way to wear a witch hat?”

“I’ll go check my mirror then—”

“You look spectacular,” Neville grabbed (Y/N)’s hand, stopping the witch from re-entering her room. “We’re running late as it is, come on.”

The run to the Great Hall wasn’t the most graceful, but years of practice and memorization of the hallways of Hogwarts allowed the two to arrive just before the rest of the students. McGonagall eyed the two of them down, almost disapprovingly.

“I see you two made it,” she said, slightly sour. Her eyes glanced down between the two wizards, noticing their hands were still intertwined from the run. “I do suggest, however, that you keep any and all personal relationships between the two of you absent from the students,” (Y/N) realized what she had meant, immediately pulling her hand away, almost angry at the lack of warmth.

“Oh, we’re not—”

“Students tend to gossip,” Minerva smiled, glancing down at (Y/N). “I would assume you of all people would know that much, Professor (L/N).”

“Yes, Headmistress.” (Y/N) responded meekly, dipping her head down, eyes disappearing from the brim of her hat, hopefully covering the growing pink in her cheeks.

Neville laughed. “Sorry for that,” his hand moved to fix his rather perfectly gelled hair, a strand had flown loose. “I had to stop you from going back into your room somehow.”

“You didn’t have to grab my hand, I know my way around the castle,” (Y/N) huffed, marching up to the faculty table that sat in the front of the hall.

“You didn’t let go, though,” Neville smiled slightly, if only to himself.

(Y/N) found one of two empty seats, thankfully not next to one another. The wizard that was sitting in the seat next to hers was unfamiliar to (Y/N). His dark brown hair was tied together with a gold ribbon, the hair touching nearly the bottom of his robe hood. He looked young, maybe a few years older than (Y/N), slight wrinkles dancing the corners of his violet eyes.

“Is this seat taken?” (Y/N) asked, smiling gently. The wizard shook his head.

“Of course not,” He hummed, gesturing for (Y/N) to sit down. “I must say, I can already tell you’re going to be better company than Barclay.”

“This was his seat?” (Y/N) asked again, finally settling into her seat. The students had started filing into the hall, sitting at their respective  house tables.

“He smelled of murtlap bile and cigars half the time,” He hummed, looking at (Y/N). “I enjoy your perfume much better,” the wizard sniffed deeply. “Mint. Slightly musty.” 

“It’s not perfume,” (Y/N) flamed. “I hardly wear any. It must be my toothpaste, or potions ingredients.”

“Alright Minty,” the wizard laughed, enjoying his new nickname for (Y/N). “I assume you have a name?” 

“(Y/N) (L/N), Potions Master,” She nodded. “You are…?”

“Lancelot Knight, Muggle Studies,” He shook (Y/N)’s hand. Firm, almost constricting.

“Lancelot…Knight?” (Y/N) fought back a laugh.

“Most people call me Lance, I actually prefer it,” He laughed. “My parents, bless their hearts, really had it out for me I reckon.”

“Strong name,” (Y/N) hummed. “Nice to meet you, Professor Knight.”

The first years had finally filed in, ready to be sorted by the ever elusive hat. (Y/N) had to fight back the tears each time a student was claimed to her house, like a proud mother. She had never met these kids, but was sorely excited to do such, to teach them. As the dinner went on, (Y/N) tried to memorize every moment she could, raking in her first night as a professor.

Neville had been staring at (Y/N) for quite some time. He really didn’t intend to. Why had she been trying to ignore him? All he wanted was his friend back. They were practically best mates years ago, what happened? Surely their fight couldn’t have left scars that deep on (Y/N), right? He swallowed hard, crossing the now empty hall over to the mauve-clad witch.

“(Y/N) I really think we should talk,” He started, smoothing his robes. Neville caught the eye of the wizard sitting next to her, he looked like he hadn’t taken a proper bath in weeks. “Please. Hear me out.”

“Professor Longbottom,” (Y/N) sighed. “I really don’t see—”

“Please. Just one conversation and then you can go back to ignoring me,” Neville pleaded. “I need closure. We need closure.”

“Closure?” (Y/N) stood up. “Closure to what? If the last five years were any indication to what sort of relationship we could possibly have—”

“We don’t need to be friends,” Neville felt particularly bold, cutting (Y/N) for the second time. “We don’t need to go back to where we were before, but I want to at least… I don’t know. Clear the air.”

Lance laughed. “Wow. The tension in this room is… pliable. Could run a knife through it,” He stood up. “I dunno, Minty. I reckon you should give plant-boy a chance, at least a walk in the moonlight.”

She groaned lightly, feeling both sets of eyes digging deep into her. “One lap."

Neville’s ears perked up, grinning lightly. “One lap?"

“Around the grounds. Clear as much air as you need,” She stood up, pushing her chair back hard. “You can meet me in the courtyard, I don’t think I could stand another minute in this hat.”

“Right,” Neville fought back his growing grin. “See you in a few.” He darted out, practically running to the teacher’s wing.

Lance laughed again. “Ex-boyfriends can be a pain, can’t they? Been there, done that,” He flattened his kerchief. “Though, ex-girlfriends are much messier. ‘Bout fifty-fifty, really.”

“He’s not my ex-boyfriend,” (Y/N) stated matter-of-factly. 

“Right,” He smirked. “Whatever the case, I hope you enjoy your walk, Minty.”

(Y/N) took her time returning to her chambers. Neville could wait a moment, he could wait a thousand moments. She knew he would. Was it unfair of her? Perhaps. She tried not to dwell on it, as she really needed to change into something less constricting.

Filtering through her dresser, (Y/N) had found the black trousers she had been searching for, but was distraught on a top. “It’s a windy night, better wear something warm…” she mumbled, opening her jumper drawer. She owned too many sweaters for one person, as they were her favorite thing to wear. The scratching wool felt comforting, warm. “I know I have that blue one in here somewhere…” Flinging through her collection, her hands stopped, reaching a gray one, the trim gold and maroon. (Y/N) allowed her fingers to trace the messy stitching underneath the tag.

N . L

“Stupid,” (Y/N) mumbled, throwing the cardigan to the side, revealing the blue jumper she had been searching for. “Edgar, what do you think?”

The owl clicked his beak twice, floating down to the discarded cardigan. 

“Eddie…” (Y/N) strained. “No, I’m not going to return it! Not now, anyway. It’s been seven years,” Edgar stared at his owner, fluffing the jumper with his talons. “Well don’t ruin it...” (Y/N) whispered, clawing it out of the owl’s grip. She folded it gently, placing it on her nearly empty counter, next to an old Honeydukes box. An old gift. (Y/N) hesitated for a moment, almost begging herself to pry it open.

“I shouldn’t keep him waiting any longer,” she decided, pulling the blue wool over her head. “Like a plaster, rip it off quickly.”

__

The moon was almost full, only a sliver missing from the round figure, allowing the entire courtyard to shimmer in its light. The fountain still babbled as always, water tricking down to the pool below. Neville focused on his reflection as well has he could, his hair still neatly gelled back. Well, as neat as it could be.

“She’s taking a long time…” Neville hummed, twirling a finger in his reflection, distorting the water. “Is she trying to pull a prank on me?Never going to show up? No,” Neville clicked, shaking his head. “Shut up, Longbottom. She’s your friend—was your friend.”  

“Sorry I’m late,” said (Y/N), finally entering the courtyard. “Couldn’t decide on a jumper.” 

“Miss wearing uniforms?”

“All the time,” (Y/N) groaned. “Never have to worry about what to wear, always put on the same thing.” 

Neville smiled, standing up to meet (Y/N) in the middle, hands again in his pockets. “You look nice, as usual.”

“Trying to butter me up?” (Y/N) smirked, teasing the Gryffindor slightly.

“Compliments never hurt,” he shrugged. “Thank you, for agreeing to this (Y/N).”

“I only did it because Professor Knight was listening to our whole conversation, it would’ve looked poor on my part if I didn’t”

“So that bloke’s name is Knight?”

“Lancelot Knight, if you can imagine.”

“His parents must’ve really had it out for him.”

“Must’ve.”

Silence.

“Well? We should get walking,” (Y/N) began to leave the courtyard, headed towards the open fields surrounding the castle.

Neville followed suit, allowing (Y/N) to stride at least five steps ahead. Her hair was pulled into her signature low ponytail, wrapped neatly with a bow. Neville could count on one had the amount of times he had seen her without her bow, her hair down. One of them being at the Battle of Hogwarts. It was in a pink ribbon, just like the one she was wearing now. Somehow it fell out in all of the commotion.

“Do you ever get tired of your bows?” Neville asked, almost absentmindedly. 

“We’re not here to discuss my hair choices, Professor Longbottom,” said (Y/N), not turning around. “If we were, we’d start with your horrendous use of gel.”

“Horrendous?” Neville choked. “My Gran loves it when I gel my hair back!” 

“Your Gran needs better spectacles,” (Y/N) slowed her pace, allowing Neville to get closer to her. “You used too much of it.” 

“I’ll tone it down,” said Neville, fingers now trying to mess up his hair. “(Y/N), I’ve missed you,” she didn’t respond. “I know that you probably think that I’m the dumbest bloke to walk these grounds after the way we left off, but I just wanted you to hear that.”

“I wish I could say the same.”

“I know you’re lying, (Y/N).”

“You don’t know anything, Longbottom,” (Y/N) quipped, allowing herself to turn around just once. “You don’t know how badly I needed a friend that day, how badly I needed someone to care about me.”

“I see we’ve dropped the formalities,” said Neville, noting her lack of their shared title. “(Y/N), I didn’t know what you needed. You can be really good at avoiding conversations… or people.”

“You…” (Y/N) fought back the tears, trying hard to give herself the restraint she had years ago. “You never asked!"

“How was I supposed to know?” His voice rising.

“How were you supposed to know, what? That my dad escaped from Azkaban? That-that he joined the Dark Lord again? A man I had never met in my life?” She felt the hot tears stream down her cheeks. “You knew all of that!”

“I didn’t know he was there! The battle was a bit hectic, loads of people were dying, (Y/N).”

“Including him! My own father!” (Y/N) seethed, her eyes forcing themselves to meet with Neville’s. “My own father died and I never got to meet him, never got to say hello, let alone goodbye.” 

“I’m so sorry, (Y/N). I didn’t know at the time, I was—”

“Preoccupied with Lovegood. I know.”

“That’s a bit uncalled for,” He quipped. (Y/N) sat with her knees tucked under her chin. Neville’s tone softened. “You’re hurting right now. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you, then, I mean,” He sat down next to her. “But I’m here now.”

“That man,” (Y/N) continued, as if Neville wasn’t staring her down. “He was the reason I tried so hard to be good. To be everything he wasn’t. Kind, caring, loving,” she wiped a stray tear. “Why did it hurt so bad when he died?”

“I don’t know,” Neville admitted. That was a question only (Y/N) could answer. He felt like she knew that. “I found out when reading about the dead. Your dad’s name stuck out. I sent an owl—”

“I know.” 

“What? I thought you said—”

“I lied,” (Y/N) chuckled airily. “I got them. All of them.”

“But why would you lie?”

“I don’t know,” she shrugged, hugging her knees harder. “I never opened them.”

“Why?”

“I dunno,” another shrug. “I was being dumb. I wanted so badly to cut you out of my life for good. To forget that I ever—” she stopped.

“I know I wasn’t the best of friend in that moment,” he rested a hand on her shoulder. “I’m damn well trying now. I know we can’t get back to where we were before, but I want to at the very least give it a go,” he sat down, gingerly, as to not disturb (Y/N). He pushed his arm to the other shoulder, resting his head atop hers.

“Thank you,” (Y/N) whispered, leaning into his touch, enjoying the embrace.  

“Do you think you could start calling me Neville again? As a step in the right direction?” (Y/N) nodded wordlessly. “Good. I’ve missed it.”

“My father dying…” (Y/N) loosed her grip on her knees, opening up slightly. “Isn’t the only reason we fought.”

“No. I guess not,” Neville knew exactly what she was talking about. He couldn’t find the words to express that day, that argument in full. “ We can pretend it is for now. We should talk about it. Another day,” he smiled lightly.

“Another day,” she repeated. “Neville.”

__

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[thesffcorner]

The King’s Men

The King’s Men is the third book in the All for the Game written by Nora Sakavic. If you haven’t read the previous two books, then first off, why are you reading this, second, I will SPOIL EVERYTHING that happens in them. Got it? Good. Let’s start. 

I read the Raven King and started writing a review, that I just couldn’t finish. I was so shell-shocked, so absolutely floored by the way that book ends, that I couldn’t put any of the things I felt into words, and by the time I felt I could write something, I had forgotten some of the things that happened in the first half of the book. I had no desire to reread it; I had no desire to read anything really, that’s how deep the reading slump that book threw me in was. I wasn’t sure I would ever finish the series. Well, finish the series I did, and I’m happy to say that this was my favorite book. In most ways I liked it the same as book 2, but the ending really bumped it up a notch higher than The Raven King. We pick up right after the end of book 2; Neil Josten somehow managed to survive the brutality of Edgar Allen, and is back in Palmetto State, at the same time that Andrew is released from the hospital. Things aren’t looking great for the team: now that Andrew is back and off his meds, the team is back to antagonism and their 2 separate groups, something they can’t afford if they have any hopes of making to the Championship. Moreover, now that the Moriyamas know who Neil is, he can no longer hide behind his identity, and his past might finally be catching up to him. I think it’s best to go through the same points I had for the first book, so let’s start with The Plot: This is the longest book, and as such it’s the most involved plot. Not only do we follow the preliminary rounds leading up to the Spring Championship, but we also have to deal with all the revelations from the previous book: what Rico does to his teammates, his constant threats and psychological warfare over the Foxes, Kevin’s guilt for abandoning Jean to Rico’s whims, Kevin’s parentage, Neil knowing about Kevin’s parentage and Rico and Kevin knowing the truth about Neil. There is also the fact that due to Rico’s intervention Neil is now visible to the public, and of course, Andrew being sober after 2 full years of medication. It’s a lot to cover, and for the most part, I think the book handles all of these threads well. Like always with this series, I have a lot of questions that I’m sure will never be answered, so let’s start with the most obvious: the mafia plot. I was surprised to see the plot with Neil’s dad culminating around the book’s midpoint; it’s resolved before any of the Championship stuff is, which was an odd choice. The Championship, as important as it is to Neil, is still just a game; his father on the other hand is a murderer who has spent the last 8 years trying to kill Neil, and has successfully killed his mother. This section of the book was the hardest for me to read; I don’t know what it is about Sakavic wanting for Neil to suffer the most gruesome violence, but the amount of abuse this poor child has gone through is almost insane, considering he’s 19. Maybe because of what happened to him in Edgar Allen I was more prepared for the torture in this, maybe it was because I finally got desensetised to the amount of abuse in these books, but I found this slightly less emotionally taxing to read than the ending of book 2. It’s still incredibly gruesome and if you are at all triggered by this kind of stuff, stay far far away from this book (though really what are you doing reading book 3 in a series). I am not squeamish about violence or torture, but even I needed to take breaks. How Nathan’s men find Neil was something I wasn’t super clear on, but what I especially wasn’t clear on was the aftermath. I genuinely thought Nathan might maim Neil, since I had no idea what could possibly happen to get him out of that situation, and when Stuart appeared, I was shocked. His character is set up, all the way back in book 1, but I had genuinely forgotten about him in the midst of everything else, and he was welcome reveal I had not seen coming. The plot with the FBI was just bizarre to me. I have heard of people who can refuse being put under witness protection before, so that wasn’t off putting; what was, was the Feds agreeing to not only bring the Foxes to Neil, but also allow Andrew to stay with Neil the whole time he is telling them his story! I find that very hard to believe; no agency in their right mind would want an unrelated party knowing so much sensitive information about an ongoing case. In the end, we also never find out what happens to the Butcher’s Kingdom? Did they ever catch Jensen and his brother? Then there are the Moriyamas. I found the scene between Ichorou and Neil kind of funny, in how hard it tried to paint Ichorou as this dangerous, violent man who commands so much respect, while also being described as barely a 20 year old. I did appreciate that Neil was still as sharp and clever as ever, and the way he spins the events of the past two books to not only make Coach Moriyama and Rico as the villains, but also secure a future for himself, Kevin and Jean was amazing. The ending was… interesting. Look, here’s the thing: Rico absolutely was a piece of shit. He was abusive, sadistic, arrogant, unhinged and violent, and he was never shown to have any kind of redeeming qualities or even the possibility of change. But he was also still a victim; Exy was all he had, all he would ever have, and his relentless desire to get noticed by his father was humanizing. He shared that one trait with Neil and seeing him being shown a single act of kindness by Ichorou and then immediately getting shot in the head before Neil was horrifying. The fact that Neil has no morsel of remorse for him too? That was cold. Like father like son. Also does this mean that Edgar Allen won’t be a prison anymore? Evermore is no longer the Moriyama domain? Is Ichorou washing his hands off of exy? Speaking of exy, all of my criticisms still stand. However, I will say that I got used to it enough to where I honestly didn’t care or notice how out of place it was anymore. With everything happening in this book, worrying about the intricacies of how exy tied into this world became irelevant. This didn’t make the games bad or irrelevant though; I enjoyed all of the matches, especially the last 3, where some strategies and positions were changed around. Having Neil play defense against Rico was sweet revenge; I also liked that the final goal was almost a non-presence, because Neil doesn’t even know it’s happening. He’s so tired and so lost in his head that he doesn’t even realize they’d won. Honestly, having people positioned as they were at the end of the book, I almost wanted to find out more of how the world of exy looked. With Jean going to UTC, the Ravens under new management, Renee, Alison, and Dan leaving Palmetto, and Neil as captain, it would have been fun to see how the sport and the game changed. Look at me, praising a fake sport that I hated so much in book 1. Characters: I don’t think anyone reads this series for exy though, let’s be real. No, the real draw are the characters, and the relationships between them. The bulk of the character development came down in book 2; book 2 was where we found out what Andrew’s backstory was, why he and Aaron hate each-other, Nicky’s family situation, Renee’s backstory, the fallout of Seth’s murder, everything to do with Rico, Kevin and Jean, and Wymack. This book builds on all of that; Neil takes front and center role, and I really liked that. He has finally accepted that he is the glue that holds the team together; even when he’s faced with his imminent death, his first priority is protecting Andrew and the rest of the Foxes, even if that means leaving them again, knowing full well his absence would destroy them. Neil constantly thinks of himself as selfish, because he’s been taught that wanting anything other than survival is selfish, but he’s nothing but selfless. Andrew puts it best, he has a martyr complex, and he genuinely wants to do right by everyone, even if that means having little to no regard for his physical safety. He risks abuse and injuries to get people to come together, and honestly, anyone who spends time trying to crack Andrew’s shell is a saint. I didn’t much care for the Foxes when I met them, but in this book, I had fallen in love with all of them. Dan was always great, though she takes a back seat here, mostly so we can have more time to get to know the rest of the cast. Renee was always the character I struggled with the most, but I liked her a lot here. I liked that she knew exactly when to push and when to leave things be, both with Andrew and Neil. I honestly wish we could have been in her perspective when she got Jean out of Evermore, that was such a badass scene. I liked Alison least in book 1, but I loved her here. She was an amazing character; I loved that she and Neil finally got a chance to talk and come to terms with Neil being responsible for Seth’s death, that she was allowed to be angry with Neil for the entirety for book 2. She is unapologetic about everything, from how hot, rich and done up she is, to how devoted and aggressive at exy she is too. I also loved that she was the one who got the trophy shelf. Matt was always my favorite character, and he was just a gem here. I always loved him the most out of the boys, and nothing has changed; he is as funny and kind, as ever, and he was always there for Neil, even when Neil wouldn’t admit he needed help. Also his reaction to the Maserati was priceless. Nicky was the one character who I was never sold on. He is the emotional core of the group in the sense that he gives Neil the push he needs to finally recontextualize his life and his priorities. He’s a man who just wants very badly to be liked and loved, and he’s constantly put in situations where he isn’t able to do that. Nicky was more prominent in book 2, though, so this book didn’t develop him any further. Kevin too was someone who got the bulk of his character development in book 2, but seeing him finally step into his own, stand up to Rico, take control over his life and get the 2 tattoo of his face was amazing. I loved that he got there gradually, but he still got there, and though he never became any more likable, it was so gratifying to see his growth. Aaron was the character I never liked, and I absolutely didn’t like him here either. That fight he has with Neil pissed me off so much, and I loved that Andrew picked Neil over Aaron, which at least showed me that he was a little more observant than he looked. Finally Andrew. Almost more than Neil, this series revolves around Andrew. Everything Neil does is to protect Andrew, which was a complete 180 from book 1, where Neil was willing to risk Andrew’s life just for a chance to play exy. Like Kevin, Andrew never becomes more likable, and his development is rather subtle and slight, but it’s still such a different place from where he started in book 1. He never truly becomes a good person, but he learns to accept people for the decisions that they make, and to let at least one other person in. His relationship with Neil was so well developed, that authors should learn how to write a good slowburn from it. The slow build of first begrudging trust, then friendship and finally romance was excellent, and for one I really didn’t mind the whole ‘I don’t care about gender, because I’m only attracted to you’ trope. I loved the revelation of Andrew’s photographic memory, because it tied so well with both his character and the scene where Neil asks him how Andrew can let anyone touch or kiss him after everything he’s been through. That he trusts Neil because he knows Neil would never do anything Andrew would say no to was really great. I also fucking called the whole he’s taking drugs for being a psychopath; it feels so good to be vindicated. Overall, I really enjoyed this final book. The series as a whole does have a lot of flaws, and it’s definitely an acquired taste, but I’m glad I read it. Each book kept getting better, and I feel like Sakavic really hit her stride with the second and this book in terms of her characters and plot. It’s a classic YA series for a reason, and I do recommend it if you can stomach the abuse/violence; I’d be curious to read anything else this author has in store.

[aresaphrodites]

Hey but sorry to bother u but could give me those book recs? Relying on u girl

of course!! sorry bout the long wait, dear x

you said you preferred trilogies or series’ (which i don’t read much of tbh) so here are a few of my favorites: (( some of these will have full on summaries and some… not so much, i got lazy lol ))

The Lux Series by Jennifer L. Armentrout : Meet Katy and Daemon! Katy is a funny, down-to-earth book blogger who has just moved to West Virginia. And Daemon? Well, he’s her hot and arrogant next-door neighbor. He’s also an alien. This one is cheesy, yeah, but it’s so FUN! Follow along as Katy and Daemon try to figure out what they mean to each other while trying not to get killed by the Arum; the Lumen’s enemy. In this world, the DOD is well aware that aliens exist and that they live on Earth. However, they are unaware that the aliens known as Luxen actually possess powers that make them.. well… powerful beyond means. This isn’t just a romance story; it focuses on family and friendships and it has a bunch of kick ass action and the entire plot with the DOD is so interesting. 

The Pine Deep Series by Jonathan Maberry ; I’m only on the first book but this one is a bit more mature in terms of horror and things like that. If you like scary books or feel like being spooky in time for Halloween, you should definitely check this one out! 

The Mortal Instruments Series by Cassandra Clare : I’m sure you know about this one, but if you don’t! Angels, demons, warlocks, vampires, faeries, werewolves? What more could you want? When Clary Fray discovers she’s actually a Shadowhunter; an appointed warrior of the Angel Raziel and has angel blood coursing through her veins, her life is about to change forever. Join her and the rest of the Shadowhunter gang (and even a few others) as they team up to rescue her mom and stop an all out war from happening. 

The Darkest Minds Series by Alexandra Bracken ; I’m only on the first book but I absolutely love it! It’s an intense read that has me on the edge of my seat constantly. I adore Ruby and she’s easily become one of my favorite female characters of all time. 

Dorothy Must Die Series by Danielle Paige ; Okay. I know, I know. Really? Dorothy Must Die? Hear me out! This book is FUN. Trashy? Perhaps, but fun! The first book is really fast paced and honestly? I am living for a world where Dorothy is evil. So basically our main character is named Amy and she is the other girl from Kansas. She’s sent to Oz to save it from Dorothy Gale who has become power hungry and is now pure evil along with the Tin-Man, the Lion, and the Scarecrow. The rest of the series doesn’t really live up to the first book, but I would say you should read the first one anyway. It’s a lot of fun. 

Did I Mention I Love You Series by Estelle Maskame: Sixteen-year-old Eden Munro decides to spend the summer with her father in Santa Monica as her parents are divorced now. Once there, she meets her father’s new family and that includes Tyler Bruce; her new asshole step brother with a short temper and a huge ego but as she gets to learn more about him, she finds herself falling for him. This trope isn’t for everyone and I know the whole step sibling thing is super taboo but this series is awesome and I read it during a huge reading slump and it really helped me get though it. 

Perfect Chemistry Series by Simone Elkeles: When Brittany Ellis walks into chemistry class on the first day of senior year, she has no clue that her carefully created “perfect” life is about to unravel before her eyes. She’s forced to be lab partners with Alex Fuentes, a gang member from the other side of town, and he is about to threaten everything she’s worked so hard for―her flawless reputation, her relationship with her boyfriend, and the secret that her home life is anything but perfect. Alex is a bad boy and he knows it. So when he makes a bet with his friends to lure Brittany into his life, he thinks nothing of it. But soon Alex realizes Brittany is a real person with real problems, and suddenly the bet he made in arrogance turns into something much more. (Each book in this series focuses on a different Fuentes brother.)

Fighting to Be Free Series by Kirsty Moseley: Jamie Cole has just been released from juvenile detention. Determined to go straight, he tries to cut ties with crime boss Brett Reyes - but Brett has no intention of letting him go. Jamie’s life is already more complicated than it needs to be, yet it’s when he meets a beautiful stranger at a bar that Jamie knows he’s really in over his head. Ellie Pearce has just come out of a terrible relationship and isn’t looking for anything serious; until she meets Jamie. Their attraction is overwhelming and intense - she can’t seem to shake her growing feelings for him, even though she’s trying to keep it casual. But when fate goes horribly wrong and Jamie’s family is faced with ruin, he’s forced to strike a deal with Brett. Despite his struggles, he wants nothing more than a future with Ellie. That’s until Ellie finds out that he’s been hiding more from her than she could ever imagine. 

Mind if I drop in a few stand alone’s? I’m trying to read more series’ but I’ve always been more of a stand alone kind of girl, so here are some of my current favs: 

#MurderTrending by Gretchen McNeil : WELCOME TO THE NEAR FUTURE, where good and honest citizens can enjoy watching the executions of society’s most infamous convicted felons, streaming live on The Postman app from the suburbanized prison island Alcatraz 2.0. When seventeen-year-old Dee Guerrera wakes up in a haze, lying on the ground of a dimly lit warehouse, she realizes she’s about to be the next victim of the app. Knowing hardened criminals are getting a taste of their own medicine in this place is one thing, but Dee refuses to roll over and die for a heinous crime she didn’t commit. Can Dee and her newly formed posse, the Death Row Breakfast Club, prove she’s innocent before she ends up wrongfully murdered for the world to see? Or will The Postman’s cast of executioners kill them off one by one?

One Small Thing by Erin Watt : Meet Beth and Chase. Beth is entering her senior year and is still trying to move on from the death of her older sister three years ago. In a small town with parents who have suddenly become her wardens; that seems nearly impossible. And then she meets the mysterious and hot Chase who immediately draws her in. Their attraction is instant and he’s the first person who makes her feel like Beth Jones and not Lizzie; the young girl who lost a sister and is somehow broken by it. But as she falls harder for Chase, she’s hit with the reality of the part he played in her sister’s death. It’s about forgiveness, love, and moving on. It’s sad and sweet and such a fun, quick read. Definitely good for trying to get out of a slump! 

Autoboyography by Christina Lauren :  Fangirl meets Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda in this funny and poignant coming-of-age novel from New York Times bestselling author Christina Lauren about two boys who fall in love in a writing class—one from a progressive family and the other from a conservative religious community. If you read one book off of this list, PLEASE let it be this one. This book is so… amazing. It’s been months and I still think about it constantly. 

Fault Line by C. Desir : Trigger WARNING: THIS BOOK CONTAINS A RAPE. It is not shown, but it’s the main conflict in the book. Over the years I have struggled with if I liked this book because it was good or if I liked it because of how much it fucked me up. I read this book in one sitting and when I finished, I sat in my bed for a good hour and just…. didn’t move or do anything. You will NOT be rooting for the main couple. The narrator is unlikable and you will HATE all the characters in this book. The ending is NOT happy and I don’t know why I’m recommending this but GOD. This book, after so many years, just stuck with me because of how fucked up it was. It deals with the whole “recovery” process in such a dark way that we normally don’t see in YA fiction and I think that’s what makes it stand out so much. If you want something darker, read this. But read it with caution. If this isn’t something you like then please, don’t bother reading it. It’s not happy and it’s sure as shit not fluffy. Summary : Ben could date anyone he wants, but he only has eyes for the new girl—sarcastic free-spirit Ani. Luckily for Ben, Ani wants him too. She’s everything Ben could ever imagine. Everything he could ever want. But that all changes after the party. The one Ben misses. The one Ani goes to alone. Now Ani isn’t the girl she used to be, and Ben can’t sort out the truth from the lies. What really happened, and who is to blame? Ben wants to help her, but she refuses to be helped. The more she pushes Ben away, the more he wonders if there’s anything he can do to save the girl he loves.

Meddling Kids by Edgar Cantero : If you like Scooby-Doo or Archie’s Weird Mysteries this book is probably for you. 1990. The teen detectives once known as the Blyton Summer Detective Club are all grown up and haven’t seen each other since their fateful, final case in 1977. Andy, the tomboy, is twenty-five and on the run, wanted in at least two states. Kerri, one-time kid genius and budding biologist, is bartending in New York, working on a serious drinking problem. At least she’s got Tim, an excitable Weimaraner descended from the original canine member of the team. Nate, the horror nerd, has spent the last thirteen years in and out of mental health institutions, and currently resides in an asylum in Arhkam, Massachusetts. The only friend he still sees is Peter, the handsome jock turned movie star. The problem is, Peter’s been dead for years.The time has come to uncover the source of their nightmares and return to where it all began in 1977. This time, it better not be a man in a mask. The real monsters are waiting. 

Fatal Throne by Candace Fleming ; A book about Henry VIII and his six wives. If you like historical fiction then this book might be for you! It’s told through the perspective of his six wives (and even Henry himself) and it’s a really fascinating read. 

Okay, I think I’m going to stop here. Let me know if none of these speak to you and I’ll give you some more recs! I didn’t know what kind of genres you liked, so I tried to throw in a little bit of everything.

[margoslxix]

OKAY so I was tagged by @autisticmob and I think these things are fun so here we go!

Rules: Choose any three fandoms (in any order), answer the questions and tag 10 people you want to get to know better.

So, obviously I gotta pick:

1. Homestuck

and 

2. New Albion

But I legitimately don’t know what third fandom to pick. I’m going to go with.......

3. Magic the Gathering

Because, I don’t know, I like it and I don’t get enough chances to talk about these characters.

First Character You Loved:

1. “First” is tricky, because I loved most of the characters pretty right away. I guess Calliope? Not that I hadn’t loved anyone before Act 6 or anything, I just remember liking her right away after meeting her, and also thinking she was my favorite character for a while.

2. Again, this is a hard one. Annabel is probably the obvious answer, but it’s true. I think she’s everyone’s first favorite, though. Her songs are just so good, plus she’s the first character you really get to know.

3. Hmmm. Liliana? I loved her aesthetic right away, for sure. I mean, be honest, how can you not at LEAST think she’s pretty goddamn cool.

The Character You Never Expected to Love So Much:

1. Caliborn, full stop (heheh). He’s my son and I would die for him. My very, very first initial impression of him was “god, what a douchebag.” But he’s MY douchebag now and tbh I relate to him a lot. He’s got a lot of problems, he’s definitely not an easy person to like. But I think he has so much narrative potential, and even most of his awful qualities (mostly the misogyny, let’s be honest) could honestly probably be dealt with if he was actually properly socialized. Which I’m still not 100% sure isn’t canonically possible. Too bad the comic’s mcfucking over.

2. Lloyd Allen. He definitely comes across as a dick, but he’s got a lot of hidden depth. He’s just such a good guy? Like, once you learn the lengths that he went to and the danger he put himself in, just for the chance to make his boyfriend happy again, I just... I can’t, I’m getting very emotional. I love Lloyd Allen, okay?

3. Gideon MOTHERFUCKING Jura. I hate Lawful Good, usually. I think it’s often just an excuse for characters to be stupid as hell, rigid, and incapable of understanding moral ambiguity. But honestly, Gideon is one of the best Lawful Good characters I’ve ever seen. He is legitimately heroic, and the fact that he’s not 100% rigid in his alignment, choosing Good over Law every time, is honestly cool. I just... he’s a character type and trope that I usually can’t stand, but done very well, and that’s impressive enough that I honestly love him.

The Character You Relate To Most:

1. If you’ve followed me for any length of time, you already know it’s Caliborn. He’s stubborn, determined, unyielding... and I’ll admit, I’m much the same. I think I approach problems in a similar way to him, and get confused/annoyed by similar, arbitrary things. Also, he’s absolutely autistic, and I’ll fight anyone who says he isn’t. 

2. Uncle Raven, aka David Adams. I mean, there are a lot of things about him that I can’t relate to. A lot. Like being extremely attractive, for one thing. But he is Aesthetic Goals. He’s a sad carnival man, and I’m a sad man who loves carnivals. He also copes with loneliness and abandonment about as well as I do, which is to say, not very well at all. Also the whole, “sad businessman who lost his mind and gained superpowers” thing is somehow also relatable. Now where the fuck are my reality-bending powers?

3. Vraska, probably. Gods, I fucking love Vraska. If Gideon hadn’t been my answer for the last one, it would have been her. The Ixalan story really hit me hard, and I love her a lot. Just, she’s been through a lot of shit and it’s made her hard and cruel, but who she is around Jace, now, with her memories intact, just... aaa, fuck, I love Vraska. I really hope they beat up Nicol Bolas soon. Fuck that guy.

The Character You’d Slap:

1. Cronus, probably. He just needs to stop. Not stop anything in particular, just stop in general. And the thing is, I don’t even completely hate him. I just hate a lot of his bullshit. Hussie once called him “the worst character in Homestuck,” and honestly, I can see it.

2. Okay, yeah, the “correct” answer here is probably Edgar or Sarah. But I’m still gonna go with Connor. I just, I don’t know, I have this weird, irrational hatred for Connor. I find him incredibly irritating. Almost every problem he’s ever had has been his own damn fault, and it’s obnoxious hearing him cry about it. I mean, “Connor” is still a gorgeous song and all, but as a character, I just wanna tell him to suck it the hell up.

3. Nicol Bolas? I mean, he deserves way more than a slap. But it seems like he’s literally behind every bad thing that happens lately and he needs to knock it the fuck off. Amonkhet was particularly like.... DUDE, not cool. You can’t just turn an entire world into a zombie factory, what the FUCK is wrong with you? I hate this fucking dragon, and this is coming from a guy who loves dragons, and also villains.

 Three Favorite Characters (In Order of Preference):

1. Caliborn, Calliope, Dirk

2. Raven, Lloyd, Han Mi

3. Vraska, Jace, Chandra (this list subject to change at literally any time)

A Character You Liked At First, But Don’t Anymore:

1. Okay, so this is going to sound incredibly harsh, so let me preface it with, it’s not that I DON’T like him, it’s just that he annoys and vexes me, and I’m sick of seeing him, and ALSO that I used to like him more than I currently do. In FACT, I do sometimes have feelings about him that I would normally have mostly for characters I like more, so it’s not that I hate him, okay? But it’s Jake English. Fucking... he’s so goddamn stupid and self-absorbed. And yeah, I get that it wasn’t his fault. I get that he’s been through some serious shit that no one should have to go through. Yeah, okay, just like every other character in this comic. But like, come on dude. But it’s less about him, I think, and more about how the fandom treats him. He’s not just an accessory for Dirk, for one thing (and I’m sorry, you can NOT convince me that they get back together in the end, that’s stupid, they had literally no chemistry whatsoever). And anyway, I’ve ranted way, way longer than I need to. But I have to set the record straight. I don’t HATE Jake English, I just think he’s dumb as a bag of teeth and I’m sick of seeing his face.

2. I’m actually having a hard time thinking of anyone specific. The more I learn about most characters, the more I like them. Seriously, I’m trying to think of a character that I like even a little bit less than my first impression of them. Maybe Connor? But I wasn’t really super crazy about him from the beginning, so I feel like that doesn’t count. I guess I’m going to have to go with Tristan from A Pirate’s Tale (even though that doesn’t technically count as New Albion but FUCK IT, I’m counting it) because like, “Ride the Hemp” is my jam and an awesome song, but when you actually read the script, he’s just kind of a dick. So yeah, I guess that’s it.

3. Again, there’s no one in particular. I think both Liliana and Nissa fall under “I used to love them a lot, but now I’m feeling a bit more ambiguous about them”--Liliana because DAMN getting a look at how she’s treated Jace all this time from Vraska’s perspective was some SHIT, and Nissa because I don’t particularly approve of her leaving the Gatewatch after all that shit about realizing that Chandra was her friend and all. I don’t know. I don’t hate either of them. Heck, I don’t even dislike either of them. But that’s one thing that’s cool about the constantly shifting perspective in the Magic stories. I just know I’m going to see something from their perspectives that changes everything before too long. Hell, Dominaria is already giving me a lot of Liliana feels.

A Character You Did Not Like At First, But Do Now:

1. See, I actually kind of liked everyone in Homestuck right away. And I’m not even counting Caliborn here, because I never really disliked him, I just never expected him to be my favorite character. I guess maybe Eridan? It’s not even that I particularly like him that much now, I just don’t dislike him as strongly as I did at first. I’m not even sure why. I think that one fansong (”Ugly Story”) kind of increased my affection for him. But he’s still not even in my top 20, so I don’t know.

2. Rachael. I’m not going to lie, the first time I listened to The New Albion Guide to Analogue Consciousness, I thought she was obnoxious. I mean she did lowkey try to get herself killed while singing a big, dramatic song for the sole reason that this guy that she was convinced was her destined love match turned out to be gay. That’s some fuckshit, right there. But the more I listened and the more I thought about her... with all the shit she’s been through, it makes sense. And it’s not like her assumption was totally irrational. Plus, Connor told her that that was the case because Connor’s a fucking idiot. So I’m blaming him for this one. So yeah, Rachael’s actually pretty cool. Plus “The Show No One Saw” is a bop.

3. Hmmmmmmm, I don’t know. I’m honestly drawing a blank. Vraska, maybe? It’s not really that I didn’t like her, but I’ll admit, I kinda was late to the party with a lot of Magic stuff. So I was just like “Wait, isn’t she just that gorgon assassin from Ravnica?” but then Ixalan happened, and she’s my daughter now. So there’s that.

Three OTPs:

1. ....Do I even have to say it? Dirkborn is my real, true OTP. I’m utter trash for this ship. Their whole dynamic is so much fun, and honestly, these boys could be extremely good for each other. Plus, they actually have canon chemistry, so there’s that. Davekat is a real close second. It’s one I actually wasn’t 100% sold on when I first saw it, but now I can’t imagine the comic without it. I’m so happy that it’s canon. I guess third would be Roxy/Calliope, which is funny, since I really didn’t used to like that ship very much. But I’ve come around on it, it’s honestly adorable.

2. Lloydven (Lloyd/Raven) is the obvious one here. I mean, I feel like it’s lowkey the most common OTP in the fandom. But like, damn. I honestly almost cried reading The Ballad of Lloyd Allen. They’re just so in love. Second is probably Leedrian (Lee/Adrian), just because. Honestly, it’s not even that deep fam, I just think they’re cute and also I love Adrian in general. HelMi (Helen/Han Mi) is a very, very close third, if not second. Like if you cry every time. Seriously, just.... FUCK.

3. Vraska/Jace. They had BETTER get that fucking date on Ravnica! If they don’t I will scream! That’s the best ship Magic has right now, I’m sorry, that’s just how it is. Now, I will say, I’m at a bit of a loss here. I used to ship the Gatewatch as an OT5 (Gideon/Jace/Liliana/Chandra/Nissa) but I feel like that’s been complicated by a lot of other feelings I have about individual members, so I’m not sure I really ship it anymore, leaving me kind of adrift. Honestly, though? Saheeli/Huatli had better fucking sail, so I’m going to call that #2 for right now. Please let them make a robot dinosaur together! And Chandra/Nissa is still fucking quality, I don’t care what happens.

OKAY so now I have to tag people. Since KC didn’t bother tagging 10 I’m not gonna, either. Just, any mutual who wants to can take it. For the sake of actually tagging people though, let’s say.... @draconicmentalist @stokerbramwell @gearydigit @the-cheese-hive-mind @swiftyscreativitycorner @vadvivon @humanmosquito And tbh there’s a lot of other people I would want to tag but I don’t remember everyone’s URLs and tbh I’ve already spent enough time on this post so, PLEASE DO THIS IT’S FUN

[rhys-thecompanynerd-blog]

2,3, 11, 30, 53 and 54 [[ THERE YOU GO ]]

2. Favorite part of writing.

The part where it works? No, seriously. The part I enjoy most probably is the possibility to create pictures and whole scenes in peoples minds. To describe a feeling, a situation to the fullest, using a few metaphors here and there. Like, the character feels the air tensen up around him, and so does the reader at the same time.

You as a writer hold the power to form whole worlds at your very fingertips. And as soon as the words flow, you make it possible. And that’s what I love about writing.

3. Least favorite part of writing.

And as much as I love writing, I hate when it doesn’t work. When my mind isn’t able to work the magic it’s supposed to do. When my mind is empty, when I feel getting more and more depressed the more I overthink. The more I struggle to put words together, no matter how hard I try.

I hate feeling as if I was vulnerable thanks to my own inability of writing at times. I really do. I hate writers block. I get depressed, I get moody and finally, I get stressed out.

Luckily, I manage well enough to say: Alright. It doesn’t work today. Maybe it works tomorrow. Still, it’s nagging on me, the blank document almost mocking me every time I take a glance at it.

It’s a hard hobby. It’s the hardest hobby I probably could have chosen. But that’s also what keeps me going. No matter how depressed I get. 

There’s this quote that inspires me:

“Take your broken heart, make it into art.”

And it always gets me motivated again.

11. Describe your writing process from scratch to finish.

1. There’s an idea, stuck in my head. I don’t think too much about it, but I keep it in the back of my mind. Then more ideas gather around that original idea. Scenes, Conversations and so on. Then, I start to write those ideas down.

2. Good, those ideas are usually not useable for the beginning of the story, but are more of plots and twists for the middle and end. So I have to think further. How do I start a story? I think of ideas, write some of them down and finally find myself in the state of desperation.

3. There’s a lot of crying and curling into a ball as well.

4. Until I, finally, decide to start. Somehow. If it works, it works and I’m happy and I usually keep writing with delight. If it doesn’t work.. well, back to step 3 until step 4 can happen again.

30. Favorite line you’ve ever written.

Okay and here’s where I’m stuck.

I just pick a few I like, okay?

Hidden In The Shadows ( Dishonored / Thief Crossover)

“Curiosity overtook the man, overgrew the fear in his heart that told him to stop right where he was standing. But what could happen to him that could be worse than the situation he was already in? He was a dead man already.”

Alone ( Borderlands ) //Not uploaded yet//

The silence that fell upon the room once more felt suddenly so much heavier, so much thicker, making it hard to breathe. Every second lasting a lifetime and maybe even longer. Vaughn didn’t dare to look at her any longer. His anxiety keeping him from it. The anxiety that he wasn’t able to keep her close for just one and a half eternities longer than that moment. Impossible. 

Shattered ( Hetalia )

But yet, his heart started to beat painfully in his chest once again. Emil shouldn‘t care if this stranger was texting him or not. And yet, it broke his heart, shredding it into pieces. After all, after their talk, Emil felt, for the first time in forever, understood by someone.How they had talked for such a long, yet so short, while and how they actually made the light-haired laugh which noone had managed to do for a while. Too long.Emil bit down on his lip, hard enough for him to believe that he would draw blood in just a moment.It had been stupid to begin with, to think that a stranger, who just happened to be on the other end of the line, would care enough for a boy he had never met before. Maybe the stranger just felt sorry for the boy who had a breakdown in the middle of the night, who was crying and in need for help. So desperate that he called a hotline, so they could fix him.

Not actually lines, but little parts I like best about those Fanfictions.

53. What does writing mean to you?

It means a whole lot to me. It’s a way of expressing me, my thoughts and much more. I love to put my thoughts, my ideas and such into words. To play around with metaphors, with pictures and with feelings and the heaviness that lies within the words I use.

I love to play around with the readers emotions just as much I enjoy to type the words out as they come.

I love words. I love how you can put a sentence simple, for everyone to understand, but at the same time I love how you can put it so differently, in both, meaning and choice of words. 

And this is the power an author has.

54. Any writing advice you want to share?

Don’t give up.Don’t be like me. I gave up far too many times on stories I had in mind, because I thought they were stupid and deleted them in the process.

Try to get something down on paper or document every time you get the chance.

Don’t lose hope. Which I still do often. But even people I look up to, like Kafka, Stephen King or Edgar Alan Poe or J.K Rowling had times where it was bad. Where no word would spill from their fingers and their mind couldn’t concentrate on a single thing they wanted to tell their audience.

Hell, Kafka had months of writers block and got around it with time. 

Just stick to it.

Write it. Let it be bad. Allow yourself to write bad. Keep it. Look at it, make it better next time. No book was written perfectly in just a day. It takes work.

Writing’s a journey, it’s hard, it’s demanding. And it can hurt you in some ways. But it’s worth it, if you stick to it. Face the lows just as much as the ups and appreciate them for what they are. Because lows are also there to forge the author in a way.

(Hell that sounds like straight out of some motivation guide. Sorry)