#sorry this turned into a whole ass essay yikes lmao

[thegoldenlily]

I feel like Rose judges Adrian for the wrong things, because she projects her addiction issues onto him and has very low standards for how royal Moroi will treat her romantically: she unfairly resents him for being an addict but doesn’t hold him accountable for his selfishness as a partner. When Rose should be kinder about Adrian’s relapses but call him out for taking advantage of her, she does the opposite. She looks down on him for his vices and blames herself for his emotional manipulation.

The whole R*drian situation is quite messy, but when it's given time and contextual reminders, it makes a little more sense and does feel like a potentially realistic relationship between two young people in this society.

From Rose's perspective, Royal Moroi men are not often great. We know that they like Dhampir women, they sexualize them and start physical relationships with them. Any children they may have are ignored and brushed aside. We see through Nathan that they don't always treat Royal Moroi women with respect either, but this is in a very different sense. Dhampir women essentially are at the bottom of the social hierarchy. They have to prove themselves in a different way than Dhampir men too: at any given moment, a Dhampir woman can be brushed off as a bl**dwh*re, her reputation ruined. A Strigoi is the worst thing anyone can become in this world, but judging by the shock and disgust Rose herself has for non-Guardian Dhampir women, a bl**dwh*re isn't that far off.

Adrian doesn't overly help that image. Adrian constantly ignores Rose when she says no, ignores her boundaries (actively pursuing her when she rejects him, smoking near her despite her dislike for it while not doing that around Lissa, a Royal Moroi woman), sexualizing her. He really does treat her the way Royal men have treated Dhampir women historically.

With Rose projecting her addiction resentment onto Adrian...I mean, we can't vilify her for that. Addiction has a huge stigma in this world, we do see that with how people treat Adrian, however different groups of people are treated differently for their addiction. Not unlike our own world. The rich and powerful's addiction is written off. It is acceptable. They will receive help, expensive treatments, and the world will move on. They will continue to be rich and powerful. Adrian struggles with substance abuse for many reasons (I am currently working on an essay about Adrian and why I believe he behaves the way he does) but his addiction is ultimately written off by society "Oh, that's just Adrian." Rose is the only one we truly see disgusted by his substance use.

Now, as a Dhampir woman, the worst thing you can be is a bl**dwh*re. Rose struggles with addiction after a long period of time feeding Lissa. We see her occasionally yearn to be bitten to get close to that high again. We also see her inner disgust at those desires, and her subsequent harsh treatment for anyone she perceived as a bl**dwh*re. If Rose's addiction was announced to the world, her life would be over. She would never become Lissa's Guardian. She would likely not get any Guardian job. She would lose all respect. I believe that she judges Adrian so harshly because ultimately while they both struggle with addiction, he is allowed to do it in a public space. People may sneer at him, or make comments, but he is still a Royal. He still is powerful. Rose would be destroyed. It can't be easy to deal with that.

Rose should be kinder to Adrian regarding his substance use because she does, in a sense, understand what he's going through. But she is a person, and feeling resentful towards someone who can continuously mess up or step out of line in ways you know you never could, will take its toll.

Rose can't change the way Royal Moroi men have always been. She expects them to treat Dhampir women poorly because they historically have, and they continue to do so. It is something she has had to learn to digest. Substance abuse isn't as common as that, though, in what we know of the VA world. Her anger at Adrian is direct, and truly mirrors the anger she feels at herself for what she perceives as being weak.

Rose isn't allowed to go back to her substance of choice. It would ruin her. She cannot afford that luxury, and she doesn't want to be shamed for it. Watching Adrian...indulge (in Rose's eyes at least) in these things triggers her, and her resentment. She doesn't have the patience to help him through these struggles, but it is hard to be there for someone going through addiction. Especially when you yourself struggle with it. Additionally, Adrian does put his mental health on Rose often, calling her his strength. Rose is struggling with her own battles. This would also build resentment.

Rose does internalize the way Adrian treats her. I think it is fair to remember that when Rose and Adrian do pursue a romantic relationship, Rose is an 18 year old (that is still. So! Damn! Young!) who has been thoroughly traumatized and abused by a man she loved (Strigoi!Dimitri) . She is not in a healthy frame of mind to be in a relationship. She feels guilt and shame and isn't processing things as well as she could have with appropriate help (get my girl some therapy). Even once Dimitri is restored, she is still traumatized. Maybe even more so after Dimitri refuses to see her and then tells her "love fades, mine has."

I think part of the reason why Rose blames herself is because she feels so guilty. She never had romantic interest in Adrian. She feels guilty for not returning his feelings, for taking his money, and she feels like she owes him. She doesn't, but she's young and traumatized. Part of being emotionally manipulated is feeling guilty and faulting yourself for how others treat you. It takes time and healing to look back and realize you were a victim.

Ultimately, Rose and Adrian were not good for each other. Rose treats Adrian unfairly at times, and shames him for his substance abuse. Adrian disrespects Rose's boundaries and emotionally manipulates her. Both have done wrong things. Both are suffering on an individual level.

Ultimately, Rose is a traumatized 18 year old trying to make it through, and even if she doesn't always make the best choices, she's just trying to get by.

[milkacchan]

Request for anon: Can I have Present mic, Aizawa, and all might where they learn their young student is fatherless? Like... their father walked out/went to prison when they were young. I'm sorry if this is time consuming, but I can't stop sobbing over my father.

I'm the situation baby but remember it wasn't your fault

I changed it up a little bit with Mics- I hope you don't mind

Present Mic:

• from the getgo something was wrong

• The moment you walked into class he could tell

• You looked like shit

• Dark bags under your eyes, hair messily brushed, just to get it out if your face, and your eyes were a light red.

• You didn't look particularly happy to be there either

• something turns in his stomach, a gut feeling that something really had went down

• And he hated seeing his students upset

• but he was relatively close to you to begin with, his felt different

• He felt like he had to do something

• Everyone settled into their seats as the bull rung but his eyes remained on you

• You honestly didn't pay attention during the lesson

• He could tell as much

• class finishes and the bell rings but you sit still, and it's not until most of the students have trickled out of the room do you start packing up

• He walks over and kneels in front of the desk "You okay there? You don't look so good," he looks concerned and his heart drops when he sees your lip start to quiver

• It takes you 0.27 seconds to break and you're frantically wiping your eyes as sobs wrack your body

• He's got his arms wrapped around you in seconds and you're leaning into his shoulder.

• He isn't sure exactly how long you're crying for but eventually you calm down enough to get out a coherent sentence

• "My-My dad was arrested Friday night. He won't tell me why- he won't let anyone else tell me why and I don't know what else to do," you cry, "I miss him so much and its only been a few days- I don't- I don't have anyone else, Mr. Hazashi,"

• And you're crying again.

• He has you take the rest of the day off, in fact he takes the day with you

• He calls in a sub (you don't know what strings he had to pull for that but you don't ask, at this point you don't care) and you two dip

• He takes you to get food, real food, that'll make you feel better

• He knows that'll help a little

• and after that he takes you to get something sweet- that tends to help mood and blood pressure and anxiety

• So he does his best with you

• He nutures you the best way he knows how

• if you need anything and I mean ANYTHING this man has you covered

• He does his best to step up in any way he can

• first off he extends his assignment deadlines and cancels two tests. Who needs them anyway.

• And you eat lunch in his classroom because he can well tell you don't want to talk to anyone else right now

• He closes it off (seemingly) so in reality its just you and him

• He'll probably tell Aizawa too but on the downlow (just so he knows)

• When holidays roll around, the dorms close.

• In this case- he let's you stay with him. He has an extra bedroom. He doesn't want you to stay in an empty house.

• You also get his phone number (which you gladly use) for anything really

• Bored? He'll deliver some shitty puns.

• Confused about homework? Text him.

• having a mental breakdown? He's got you covered.

• You got memes? Please for the love of God send them to him.

• The dynamic eventually shifts to a VERY father daughter relationship.

• He knows he'll never replace your dad. He understands that wholeheartedly, but he wants you to have someone

• He actually gets a letter from your dad, thanking him for taking care of you

• but he really doesn't mind

Aizawa:

• He had a feeling that there was something going on at home. Or rather, a lack of something.

• He's dealt with it in the oast- with himself and with past students and current ones

• Shinsou

• I mean, aside from that fact whenever parents were mentioned, you'd either stiffen up or wrinkle your nose

• You didn't really like the subject of parents

• There was an essay prompt about parents (nothing too personal) nd you ended up writing it on the extinction of dinosaurs and why God fucked up instead

"It'd be absolutely stellar to see huge lizards roaming the earth and occasionally stepping on people, you know? Jurassic park was onto something."

• Man's couldn't even fail you on it because it was written v well

• Anyway, he doesn't pry too much. He just silently figures it out by process if elimination and pattern.

• He doesn't really care too much

• In the sense if it doesn't define you and he doesn't help you because he pities you

• he helps you because he seems potential

• He takes you under his wing with shinsou

• Yall spend a whole summer training

• And that's when it all came out

• It was an accident really.

• Shinsou was tired, exhausted really

• and when people get tired- that tired- sometimes they spout random shot they wouldn't usually say

• and thats what he did

• he went on about his home life

• and if he could, you could too right?? You could trust them.

• "My dad walked out when I was a kid. Little, like 3. I have a few pictures of him holding me, but I guess it wasn't enough. I don't have any desire to meet him. Not anymore. But it left me feeling like I did something wrong? I guess? Which I suppose is why I train. Because then I feel strong. Which is a good difference from how it usually feels."

• He knew it.

• He called it.

• He was right again.

• He reassures you that you are good enough, strong enough, and his decision to leave had nothing to do with you

• and when he saw you give him a soft smile, he warmed.

• I mean really, it only goes up from there

• he'll deny it, or grumble under his breath, but he seems you two as his own

• Like these aren't my kids but they are my kids

• When dorms close on holiday yall get to stay because that's where he lives too

• Like if you chose too

• he's not gonna force you to stay but if you don't want to go home, you don't have too

• He has that power

• He will buy you food

• all you gotta do is ask

• and he'll roll his eyes and grumble something he doesn't really mean, just secretly happy that you feel comfortable enough around him to ask for something

• lmao family group chat

S: 'Hey Mr. Aizawa I found this cat. Hold on lemme send a pic'

A: 'Dont need a pic. Bring him home'

Y: 'What if he's ugly??'

A: 'gremlin. Bring him home.'

Or

Y: 'Hey I saw this tweet that said 'kids be like watch this and do a half roundhouse spin kick clap and waste my fucking time' and it make me think of you.'

S: @ mr. Aizawa when he has to watch deku do sumn

Y: Lmaoooo like when he threw the baseball

S: LMAOO

A: Me watching you too try to figure out how to beat me in training

Y: Yikes bro

S: That was a rough one

• Does he regret giving you and shinsou his number??

• Maybe

• Not really

• Lmao super secret lunch movie days

• Every week on wendesday yall watch a movie. Usually it takes 2 or 3 days to watch the movie since lunch is only 70 minutes

• @ you accidently calling him dad one day and shinsou snickering but it stuck

• dadzawa lmaoo

Allmight:

• Man's has 2 underlings.

• You and Deku.

• Picked you up when he started teaching at UA

• Ion know let's say one day you popped off bc he said some dumb shit and you were like no sir that's clearly wrong

• schooled him in his own damn subject

• the other kids were like 😳

• what the fuck

• Anyway

• He see's you have potential

• And though he's not the best teacher, you seem to respond better to the way HE was taught

• So tbh its easier to teach you

• 'okay, now I want you to beat the shot out if that wall,'

'Okay lmao bet'

• Midoriya is like, hey mayhaps we should analyze the situation

• N ur like noe

• You just don't give a fuck

• about anything really

• other than moving up the ranks

• But even then- its not a super super big deal, you're just gonna do your best but you aren't gonna stress

• However he noticed a pattern w you (even before Midoryia brought it up to him)

• You don't let anyone in

• Midoryia knows a bit more than the other students but that's really only because he's always with you

• a good majority of the week he's w you

• but its not really a deep connection

• you don't rely on either of them

• You do your best to do things on your own.

• He knows midoryias life story

• he knows why he acts the way he does

• but he doesn't know why you do

• he has a gut feeling it could be the same as midoryia

• I mean he already had one kid who's dad dipped

• he'll surely be able to figure out you too??

• So he makes himself a promise that he'll figure it out and he'll become someone you trust

• And he does just that

• When you tell him about your nightmare of a family history he's like mm, makes sense

• but he's happy that you trust him!!!

• He's a BIG suckered for movie nights

• he's got popcorn, snacks, candy, chocolate, soda- he's prepared

• list of movies lined out all ready

• I lowkey feel like he'd be into lord of the rings or fast n furious

• fast n furious at LEAST

• He's really into American action movies

• and he has no problem sharing those movies with you

• he doesn't have a whole ton of money, like he's not rich, but if you or midoryia need something he's definitely there to get it for you

• even if ur like fam no you don't need too

• he'll buy yell food a lot

• a l o t

• and cards

• when you and midoryia get him a father's day card he thinks he's gonna cry

• You guys also have a group chat

• 'da faemilee'

• Y: "Hey dad do you have milk?"

A: "???? Do I have milk????"

Y: "ya I'm looking in your fridge n ion see any???"

A: "How'd you even get in????"

Y: "Izuku."

I: "lmaoo"

Or

Y: Izuku you dumb bitch I left for ONE day

Y: And you got into a fight with Bakugou

I: He wanted to throw hands. I just did what you would do.

A: He's got you there

Or

A: What do you guys want for dinner

I: Sushi

Y: Chicfila

Y: Izu square up

I: K

Or

Y: Izu is fighting kacchow again

A: Beat his ass young midoriya

Y: Lmaoooooo