#sttjttw

[loverofstufflof]

36 Questions Shadowpeach AU

HEAR ME OUT HEAR ME OUT—

Okay now we got a mood set

I keep hearing them… when listening to the OST… and I blacked out…

(36 Questions is a musical about an estranged couple trying to repair their relationship by meeting each other all over again, for those who don’t see the vision)

Some minor character assignments I’ve decided on:

FFM monkeys as Henry (the duck)

Xiaotian Quan (Erlang Shen’s dog) as the “golden retriever” Jase petsits when meeting Natalie

Camel Ridge Trio as Natalie’s parents (in terms of plot device, not… you know…)

Celestial guards as “men in suits”

The Not Mayor as Lisa (Jase’s ex-wife)

Bai He as Cooper (Jase’s kid)

And special shoutout to the biggest character assassination: Ruyi Jingu Bang, for being demoted to the phone Judith records everything on, because how else am I meant to represent the catalyst for everything going wrong?

Not sure who to assign Jase’s moms as, so if anyone has any suggestions, I’m happy to hear em. Give me the dumbest ideas you can think of!

Really just all of the fucked up past Judith talks about I’m replacing with Wukong’s Havoc in Heaven; makes things easier.

A lot of the established LMK timeline is gonna be a skewed a bit to fit in with the 36 Q plot. Mac and Shi Hou meet after the Journey, not before, and Shi Hou lies about his name to not be associated with his past self, because redemption! We all know how that ends up, though

[loyaltykask]

Okay but I can't stop thinking about these 5 non-canon kids in JTTW "sequel" I just might an AU where he keeps them himself after the JTTW, don't know how the timeline would work but just don't think about it too hard

Like he LITERALLY ACCIDENTALLY KNOCKS UP IRON FAN is like 5 levels of funny to me when it shouldn't be.

Can you imagine that conversation:

Iron Fan at Wukong’s door: Pay your fucking child support Wukong just getting back from promoting to Buddha status: Woah, first all we never did the horizontal tango, and two, I don't even have the equipment  for that to happen Iron Fan: You jumped my stomach so hard that I have quintuplets now Wukong who was born from stone: .... THAT IS NOT HOW THAT WORKS ..... (is it?) ((IS IT?))

I like to think Iron Fan treated it as more of a surrogate mom thing rather than Wukong and her having anything romantic (She's my sister! I would never!) Iron Fan and Bull Demon King get monthly visits to Red Son as long as they stay "good" while he's under GuanYin's teaching and he gets to hear about his new half-siblings... that's a conversation GuanYin had to intervene "Skinning a monkey alive is not 'merciful'"

 And just like.... the quintuplets themselves..... just the havoc I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that the only named son is the firstborn (cause it always is) and keep that this Wukong is like JTTW 1996 Wukong so super into Buddhism so, of course, he names the first son Pāramitā after the six transcendent perfections that are generosity, discipline, patience, diligence, meditation, and wisdom

AND HE NAMES THE OTHER 4 THE EXTRA FOUR PERFECTIONS (cause he's a nerd)

The second born is Upāya for skillful means

Third is Praṇidhāna for determination, this related to the Bodhisattva vows

Fourth is Bala for spiritual power

And youngest is Jñāna for knowledge

And now he's a single father of five children

Bajie gets his revenge for the Birthing-River Situation and harps on Wukong for being "loose." After several well placed hits with a staff Bajie admits the kids are cute and proceeds to spoil his new nephews/nieces

Wujing is a crier in this one and insists on staying around to help protect them. Despite Wukong living in a literal fortress in a Mountain, inhabited by immortal fighting monkeys and escorted by his generals and marshals.

But it's Wujing so of course he's always holding one of the Quintuplets at all times

Wujing crying holding monkeys like the drunk girls from youtube: I can't protect them all

Tripitaka also ascended to Buddha-hood but you cannot convince me that man isn't going to try to hold all five of them but they keep trying to slap his bald head cause that's what babies do

Wukong: Don't hit your grandmaster! Tripitaka: It's fine Wukong, it doesn't hurt Wukong: ...(I wanted to slap the head)... Tripitaka: What was that? Wukong: Nothing, Sifu!

Bai Long Ma insists that they have to have a royal celebration because they are now Royal Monkey Heirs. Wukong takes this as just a huge party but what Bai Long really meant was to have other people come "pay their respects" to the new royalty.

Wukong ain't about that life but he does like free stuff so it becomes a mix of both where he invites everyone in Heaven to come to pay his kids respect (except the Queen Mother as revenge for not being invited to HER peach festival cause he petty like that)

 It turns out to be a full blown rager in the Mountain considering he invented all of Heaven and the local 72 Demon Kings so considering it the first cultural exchange... with lots of drinking

Our five heroes are of course good monks and don't drink and while the party rages the rest of the night Wukong slips away early on (leaving a clone) to put his babies to sleep where it's nice and quiet.