#sure billy shouldn't have been mean to max but it's understandable

[fanatics4l]

if you, as a child, have to practically raise another child who is in no way biologically related to you and is only around because your biological mother abandoned you, therefore resulting in the marriage between a random woman and your abusive father, you would be pissed off at everything too.

if you, as a child, have to look after some random kid who barely listens to you and constantly gets you in trouble with your harmful father, you would be an asshole too.

if you, as a child, are forced to babysit another child when you can be spending that time doing your own teenage shit, you would dislike that child too.

if you, as a vulnerable child, are raised by a terrible father and have to witness a mother being loving towards her daughter every day when you don't have that anymore (especially when said mother turns the other way while your father hits you), you would be bitter about everything too.

if you were moved miles away from your home, away from your mother and everything you love, and are tossed into some random town in the middle of nowhere with a woman you never wanted as a mother and a girl you never wanted as a sister, you would act out too.

[strangersteddierthings]

Part Two of Class of '85.

-

June 6th, 1985

1. Make Sure Eddie Lives

Convince Wayne to move away? (how??)

Befriend Eddie sooner? (tried and failed)

Graduate Early?

2. Save Max

Stop Billy on Fourth July. Save Billy? Does he deserve it?

3. Help El With Powers. How?

Save Hopper? How to learn location of Russian prison if saved?

4. Convince Everyone To Move Out of Hawkins

That's all that's written on this slightly crumpled piece of paper.

Eddie hadn't even meant to read it; when he'd shaken out the grey sweatpants it had fluttered free, slowly falling to the ground, and when he picked it up to put it back in the drawer he caught his name. And he's always been far too curious.

Eddie knows as soon as he's read it that he absolutely shouldn't have. It's too late though. He's read it, he knows now, and he can't really unknow it.

This is the list of things Steve is trying to change in this timeline.

It knocks the air out of Eddie and his knees feel a little weak suddenly. He drops himself to the floor, one hand clutching the sweats, the other the note.

Make sure Eddie lives.

Eddie lives.

Which implies that Eddie died.

Eddie's not sure what that says about him, that he's never made the connection of Steve's soft I can't lose you confessions and that he might mean Eddie is dead, and not, like, having fled Hawkins before Steve could confess his lo-feelings or something.

He's never really taken the time to stew in what Steve meant because as far as Eddie was concerned, there was no losing him. Steve's already changed the way Eddie's life plays out; he's graduated a year sooner than he did in that other timeline. He's got a part time job at the local mechanics. And though he doesn't know details, he does know that still being in high school led him to the event Steve wanted to change.

Which was his death.

He takes several deep breaths. He's not going to die because Steve's already saved him so he can deal with this. It's not even an issue.

Moving past that. Save Max. There's no last name written, but both he and Steve know only one Max. Then the line below that. They both hate Billy, yes, but what's throwing Eddie off here is the written, then stricken out, does he deserve it? The use of save gives him pause, too. It says Make sure Eddie lives and save Max. So, Max doesn't die? What does she need saved from then?

This is when Steve finds him, entering the room with a, "Did you get lost, Eds? It's the top dra- oh," Steve is stopped two steps into the room when Eddie looks up at him.

"I didn't mean to read it but I saw my name and..." Eddie says, trailing off because he doesn't actually have anything to add. He's worried for a second that Steve will be mad at him but that thought goes as quickly as it appeared. Steve moves into the room, dropping to his knees before Eddie, hands coming to cup his face.

"Oh, babe," Steve's voice is gentle, his thumbs even more so as they swipe across his cheek. "I'm so sorry."

Eddie should be the one apologizing. He's done the one thing he wasn't suppose to. He's read the list! He knows the future! (sorta) "No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have read this."

Steve makes his I-want-to-argue face but it smooths over. The tone in Steve's voice when he speaks, sounding older than his years and so fucking tired, it break Eddie's heart. "I should have burned that. This isn't your burden to shoulder. I'll just take that and you can try and forget."

He's reaching for the paper and Eddie pulls his hand behind his back, away from Steve's grasp. "No."

"No?" Steve looks surprised. Honestly, Eddie's also surprised.

"You don't have to shoulder this alone," Eddie says, "I can help. We can fix this together."

It's strange to see hope mixed with sorrow in Steve's eyes. "I can't- there's so much I don't even understand, don't even know how to explain."

"Sweetheart, let me help," Eddie whispers, shifting to his knees to easily slide into Steve's space, press soft kisses to his face between his words," I (kiss) want to (kiss) help (kiss). Let me (kiss)."

On the last kiss Steve angles his face, capturing Eddie's lips with his own, his hands still on Eddie's face allowing him to hold Eddie steady as he presses in, deepens the kiss, runs his tongue along Eddie's lip and Eddie flicks his own tongue out in return. They kiss in an odd, calm-but-desperate, deep-but-lazy, soft-but-messy way. They end it panting, foreheads pressed together to feel grounded, Steve's hands still on Eddie's face, Eddie's hands braced on Steve's thighs as he leans into him.

"Once you know, you can't unknow. It's fucking terrible, Eds," Steve whispers, "I don't want to do that to you. I don't want you to hurt."

"But you hurt," Eddie counters, "and if you hurt, I hurt. Thems the rules."

Steve laughs and kisses him again, just a quick closed lip peck, "Dustin told me once, you die, I die. Mutual destruction really shouldn't be the first go-to for showing affection for the people I care about it."

"Says the man whose favorite way to show affection is stepping between someone and a fist, or claw, or whatever."

Steve rolls his eyes and pulls back. "Weren't you going to shower?"

"Plans change. We gotta finish arguing about you telling me about this," he waves the paper, now even more crumpled, between the two of them, "so that you can let me help."

"How about you take that shower, and meanwhile, I'll cook dinner and think about finishing this 'argument' you want to have," Steve says, and even though Steve doesn't physically make the air quotes motion, Eddie still hears it in his voice.

Eddie concedes on this, though, and after stealing a soft shirt from Steve's closet, does go shower. When he's done, he takes his time detangling his hair and towel drying it as much as he can before changing into the pilfered clothing and going down to dinner. Steve is washing up the dishes he used while cooking (because this fucker cleans as he goes, what kinda sicko does that?) so, Eddie gathers plates and utensils and sets the table (because they're the kinda sickos that eat at a dinner table) .

Dinner is pork chops, mashed potatoes, and green beans. It's delicious.

They just chat about the day under the silent agreement that serious conversations were for after dinner. Eddie packages up leftovers and wipes down the counters while Steve finishes dishes and Jesus Christ when did they become so normal and adult?

Well, Steve's been an adult for a while, technically, but also, he's still just barely 18 and that's just- Eddie tries not to think about it too much, the difference between Steve's age in relation to the amount of time it's been since he was born, but also since he was forced? chosen? made to? relive 3 years of his life again.

"Alright Stevie," Eddie says, crawling into his lap on the couch, his legs bracketing Steve's, pulling Steve into him, Steve's head on his chest and his head resting atop Steve's, a mirror of their first interaction, at that party that feels so long ago and also just like yesterday, "I do have a question about your list that I feel is safe to ask and for you to answer."

"Hmm?" Steve hums back, arms wrapping around Eddie as Steve nuzzles against him.

"Befriend me got crossed out, so getting me to graduate early was the option you seemed to be going with. Obviously, befriending me ended up working. So, how in the hell did you plan to make me graduate early if we weren't friends?"

Steve snorts a laugh and says, "you're gonna laugh at me."

"Of course, I am. Tell me anyway."

"I was going to attempt doing your homework and turning it in on your behalf. I even practiced making my handwriting look different."

Eddie does laugh at him, so much that his sides start to hurt, and he would have fallen off of the couch if Steve wasn't holding him so tightly.

Then Steve has the fucking nerve to say, without the slightest hint of embarrassment, "told ya you'd laugh at me."

Well, Eddie's got no choice but to take Steve's face in his hands and kiss him senseless after that.

"Can you tell me what you mean by save Max?" Eddie asks when the kissing is done and the mood changes to serious again.

"Eds-"

"No, listen. I was thinking in the shower and like, I'm not going to get all philosophical on you, but I do think you can tell me, and we can figure out things together, maybe, and I won't interfere or do anything to, like, jeopardize the timeline. Just listen and troubleshoot."

Steve pulls back from their cuddling to eye Eddie skeptically. "I don't believe any of that for a second."

"Yeah," Eddie sighs, sagging forward to rest against Steve as he leans back against the couch now, "I just- I want to save Max, too. Let me help."

"It should have been someone else."

Eddie hears the cut off sob, presses himself down like a weight blanket, "someone else?"

"To get the second chance, the do over," Steve says, voice wet and pained, "it should have been someone else. Someone who-who remembers shit, and actually knows things. Someone smarter. I'm so afraid that I'm going to fuck this up. But then I feel like shit for wishing this was someone else's problem instead of mine."

"But it wasn't someone else," Eddie says, "it was you." Then he waits for Steve to collect himself and speak.

"The Party, they think I shouldn't tell anyone," Steve presses a kiss to the top of Eddie's head that he hears more than feels, "if I change too much, I could end up fucking up a thing that has to happen for us to win. I shouldn't tell people, or warn them, because if they make decisions based on knowledge they shouldn't have? That could get someone killed."

"So tell someone not involved. Or someone who isn't involved yet. Someone not around during the events. Then none of you are making decisions you wouldn't have already been making, but someone behind the scenes can change things. Maybe even last minute?"

That seems to give Steve pause. Eddie wants to pull back to look at him, his thinking face is adorable, but instead he shoves his face into Steve's neck and just breathes him in.

"That- I hadn't even thought of..." Steve kisses Eddie's temple, "Eddie, baby, you're a fucking genius."

"I know but it's great to have it acknowledged."

"Alright, off, I've gotta make a phone call before it gets too late," Steve says, shoving at Eddie. Eddie goes willingly, rolling a full 360 off Steve's lap so he's kneeling on the couch, elbows resting on the back of it. His eyes stay on Steve, though, tracking him as he stands, adjusts his shirt as if anyone but Eddie can see him now, before moving to the phone. It's not mounted to the wall in the living room, just sat on its own table in a corner, chair nearby.

If Eddie's gaze drifts down to Steve's butt while his back is turned, dialing whoever he's calling, well, Eddie's got no shame in that. He's allowed to look.

"Hi Hopper, it's Steve. I need you to get Dr Owens to get a hold of me. I know you have a way. No- you've got to- ok. No. Yes, this is important. Something- there is something else coming. We're not in the clear yet. No! You know I cannot tell you that. We all agreed that I wouldn't tell you anything! Hop- Hop- HOPPER. I promise, I swear on my life, El will be fine. She'll be okay. I... I just need to talk to Dr Owens. Thank you. Have him call on a Tuesday, I'm always off on Tuesdays."

Eddie listens in on the whole conversation, because if it was meant to be private, Steve would have used the kitchen phone, or the one in his room. Rich people have more than one phone, Eddie's learned. Excessive. "Sounds like it went well?"

Steve wrinkles his face in a grimace. "It's still weird as fuck. They know I'm not lying about the future thing. Not when- ever since-"

Steve can't say it again, but Eddie knows what he's talking about.

Bob Newby.

Steve blames himself hard for him. With whatever happened before Steve's time travel shit -the thing that was so bad something answered Steve's prayers and wishes to change it- Steve hadn't even been thinking about Bob. It wasn't until Steve saw Bob at the Hawkins Lab that he remembered the outcome.

He'd tried to change it, to save Bob, but in doing so he'd just endangered himself more and then Bob's death, his sacrifice, had been in protecting Steve instead of the surprise attack that had apparently been what took him last time.

Steve still can't look Joyce in the face, much less meet her eye.

Eddie hates that there's nothing he can say to alleviate this guilt from Steve. He's tried but Steve... Eddie won't even forget how his voice cracked when he said 'I knew he was going to die! I knew it, should have remembered it, but instead of someone without several concussions and memory issues getting a second chance, it's me! The fuck up! I didn't remember Bob and now, this time, it's my fault he's dead.' And Eddie didn't have the words to make it better.

Still doesn't.

"So, he's going to have the Owens dude call?"

"He's going to try," Steve says, "but can't promise. So, we'll see."

-

June 24th, 1985

Steve is in the bathroom when it happens. The phone rings, and Eddie's in the kitchen, so he picks it up, and says, "Harrington residence."

"Is this Steve Harrington?"

"Uh, no, but if we just wait a moment he'll be available soon."

The voice on the other end hums, "I do have a time limit to this call."

What an odd thing to say- oh. Oh shit. "Dr Owens?"

There is silence on the other end and Eddie's afraid he's fucked this up for Steve until he hears, "and just what else has Steve Harrington told you?"

Eddie's got a choice to make now. He can lie, or he can tell the truth. Both options have consequences, he thinks, but Eddie knows what he wants to outcome to be, so he moves to get line of sight on the hallway Steve should soon be appearing from and says, "Just listen, please. I don't know nearly enough but I want to help. I can help. Listen to what Steve has to tell you, and fucking believe him. If you think I can help with anything after that, call again on Saturday. Between ten and two."

"I'll listen," is the only response he gets, and they sit on the line for what feels like an eternity before Steve comes into view. Eddie shouts his name into the receiver, feeling bad about that only after Steve's taken the phone and Eddie has retreated to the backyard, both to smoke and to give Steve privacy.

Steve is on the phone for almost four full hours. Thirty minutes into the call, Eddie suggests he take the call to his room, so he can at least sit down. Steve agrees and hands the phone to Eddie, who listens for the confirmation that Steve has picked up the upstairs phone before he hangs up the downstairs one.

As much as he wants to eavesdrop, he wants Steve's trust more. Steve is trusting Owens, and if Owens decides it, he'll get ahold of Eddie. If there's nothing Eddie can do to help, then he'll just have to be here for whatever the aftermath is.

-

June 29th, 1985

To say that Eddie is shocked that when he answers the phone on Saturday and it's actually Dr Owens on the other line would be an understatement. He knows he offered, and he hoped, but no amount of hope makes something happen.

"Your juvenile record leaves a lot to be desired, Edward Munson," Dr Owens says in leu of any other greeting when Eddie picks up with the usual 'Harrington residence'. Eddie doesn't like that the government wasted no time digging into him. He really doesn't like that Dr Owens know his name. "I am not one to hold someone to past mistakes. You wanted to help, and reluctant though I am to admit it, there is something you can do."

"Anything."

"Alright. What you need to do is be at the Fourth of July carnival, on the lookout for Joyce Byers and Jim Hopper. They'll get there later in the day, but I don't have an exact time for you. As soon as you've found them, tell them to go to Starcourt Mall because that's where the kids are. Then you go home."

Eddie wants to know why he can't come with them to the mall but knows better than to do that. "Okay, I can do that."

"I hate to be the one to remind you, but lives are at stake here. Do what I've told you and nothing else."

"I know."

"And..." Eddie can hear the hesitation in his voice, "and just know you might not see some people you are used to seeing in the days leading up to the Fourth. Don't go looking for them."

Jesus H Christ. How is Eddie supposed to not do that? How is he supposed to be okay with people being missing? He must take too long to confirm because Dr Owens speaks again.

"Edward. I promise you, they will all make it through this."

"Okay."

Hanging up with phone feels very final. He doesn't like that Dr Owens didn't assure him of their physical safety. Didn't say they'd be okay. Or that they'd be unscathed. It was basically the nicest way the guy could have said no one you care for dies this time.

-

July 4th, 1985

Eddie spends all day at the damn carnival. He posts up around noon, which is probably way too early but he's not going to fuck this up. He hasn't seen Steve in two days and he's trying not to freak out. Dr Owens said they'd all live but fuck, in what condition? Eddie doesn't know what's happening, what was supposed to have happened without Dr Owens involved, and hates that he doesn't know how these changes Dr Owens are making to the timeline will effect Steve.

In the other timeline he knows that Steve lives, at least. This time...

The sky starts to darken when a Cadillac pulls up hot and going much faster than it should be, flying past Eddie's van to find parking closer to the entrance of the carnival. It could just be some drunks excited to ride a Ferris Wheel but Eddie's going to investigate.

Eddie recognizes Hopper instantly, the unfortunate side effect of being with Steve. The Chief of Police has become a common occurrence, with Steve inviting everyone over for pool parties, or them being invited to the Byer's for Barbeques.

"Hopper! Joyce!" Eddie yells, getting their attention before they've made it past the last row of cars to the entrance.

"Eddie! Thank God!" Joyce rushes to him, Hopper hot on her heels, along with two people he doesn't recognize. "Where are the kids?"

"Starcourt Mall," Eddie says, "you have to get to Starcourt Mall as soon as you can."

Hopper looks back to the Cadillac, then to Eddie's van. "Everyone in the van."

"Oh, I'm not supposed to-"

"Van. Now."

Eddie scrambles into the driver's seat, buckling up as Hopper ushers the strangers and Joyce in before pulling the doors closed behind him. "Get a move on it, kid!"

Eddie starts the van and guns it. It'll be fine. He'll drop them off and then go home and wait. Like he's supposed to.

Except that doesn't happen. Hopper orders him to drop them off near the entrance, then park in a far back corner and wait. And how can Eddie argue with the Chief of Police?

It does give Eddie a view he never thought he'd see outside of horror movies. About an hour passes before another car pulls into the parking lot, stationing itself facing the mall, and the Wheeler's car still parked along the curb. The headlights on the car go out, and just as Eddie is leaning forward to try and get a better look at the car, something climbs atop the mall, pulling his attention from the car and holy shit what the fuck is that thing.

Eddie clamps both his hands over his mouth to stop from screaming. Then that thing drops into the mall and someone steps out of the car. The person makes it three steps from their car before what looks like the entire US military floods out the entrance of Starcourt, and several military vehicles come barreling around the mall, probably from the employee parking area.

Then there's a knock on Eddie's window and he's fairly certain he almost pisses himself in fear. He whips his head around to look and he just sees some older guy frowning at him.

"Edward," the man's voice is slightly raised but familar, "I believe I told you to go home."

"Holy shit!" Eddie unlocks his door and shoves it open, forcing Dr Owens to step back. Eddie goes to climb out but his seatbelt chokes him because he forgot he was still buckled in. He unbuckles but Dr Owens has moved back into his space, keeping him in his van.

"I'm Sam Owens," he finally, officially, introduces himself. "Care to explain?"

"Hopper made me do it."

Dr Owens doesn't even look surprised. He looks away from Eddie now, towards the flurry of movement happening around the mall. Eddie's eyes follow and he watches as Billy Hargrove, who he can now make out thanks to the spotlights from the fucking helicopters, gets tackled by two men twice his size.

"You're going to save him, right?" Eddie asks.

At that, Dr Owens does look surprised. "We're going to try."

He thinks of Steve's note. Save Max. Save Billy. "You better succeed."

Dr Owens looks like he agrees. He also lets Eddie stay. Make him sit in his car like he's in time out, and it feels like forever, but as soon as everyone Eddie's come to care about comes out the front door, Dr Owens tells Eddie to follow him, and they go join the group.

Steve looks beat to shit and Eddie runs to him, pulling himself back before he can fling himself at Steve and pull him into his arms.

"Jesus, Stevie!" Eddie says, taking in his puffy eye and split lip, and he can't stop the hand that reaches out to touch even though he absolutely should not be reaching for him in public- Steve slams into him, tucking his face into Eddie's neck. He doesn't hesitate to wrap his arms around Steve, starts whispering, "I've got you. I'm here and I've got you."

Steve finally pulls back when Joyce approaches, "Steve, let the paramedic look at you."

Steve steps back then but doesn't put distance between them. It reminds Eddie of what he said at graduation. 'I'm not afraid of a single person in this town'. Eddie wishes he wasn't afraid, either.

"Come with me?" Steve asks. Eddie nods, and follows.

They wait while Robin Buckley gets looked over, then it's Steve's turn. Robin takes Steve's place beside Eddie and they watch as Steve is examined. Eddie sees Robin giving him sideways glances, like she's afraid to fully look at Eddie, which is... something.

Once Steve is freed from the medic he steps up on Eddie's other side, the one Robin isn't stationed at, and says, "I need to talk to Owens before we can leave."

"Oh, uh, I'm kind of the Byers' and Hopper's ride. And the weird dudes they came with. They don't speak English."

Steve barks out a laugh at that. "Murray speaks English. And hooboy did we have to hear it from him. He doesn't trust the government."

Eddie doesn't know which of them was Murray, but he agrees. He gestures towards the mall, which some people seem to actively throwing gasoline on in an attempt to burn it faster? Eddie doesn't know. "Well, can't say I trust 'em either if this is the result."

"This is the Russian government's fault," Robin says.

"Oh, no, the Russians wouldn't be this kind of particular problem without our government," Steve says.

Robin just blinks at him. "Are we... still drugged?"

"You were drugged!?" Eddie whips around to Steve.

"Truth serum," Steve nods then seems to realize how quickly he said that and frowns. "It's taking longer to wear off. Or maybe this whole issue was resolved sooner than last time?"

"Shhhh!" Eddie shushes him with a hand on his mouth, looking frantically at Robin to see if she caught was Steve just said. "Stevie. Do not talk anymore tonight."

Steve licks his palm.

-

July 13th, 1985

It's an uncomfortable gathering around the table. Dr Owens, Chief Hopper, El, Joyce Byers, Steve, and Eddie are sitting at the Harrington dining table. They've all only just sat down, eyes on Steve.

"What do you mean you can't find me?" Steve asks as a whisper. With how silent it is, though, everyone hear.

El frowns. "You are gone. I cannot find you like I could Billy, or Dad, or Dr Owens. I do not know why."

After El had some rest and recovery, Steve had asked if she would look in his memories. Or be present while he remembered them. It was Dr Owens idea; maybe El could remember details that Steve himself did not pick up consciously, but heard to saw nonetheless. They'd attempted it last night to no success.

"Perhaps this has something to do with what... brought you back to this time," Dr Owens says, picking his words carefully with how slowly they left his mouth.

Steve nods before slumping in his chair, his brows furrowing as he thinks. Eddie thinks he's ridiculously cute when he makes that face. Joyce asks Dr Owens a question but Eddie's focus is on Steve. They're sitting next to each other, so he braves bumping his knee against Steve's. Steve responds by flashing him a smile and immediately hooking his ankle around Eddie's before falling back into his thoughts.

Eddie half listens to the conversation around him, half worries about Steve and what it means for him that El cannot find his mind. That being a by-product of the time travel thing seems logical. If Steve's consciousness was dropped into a younger body, the two minds couldn't exist at the same time. So perhaps, because El is searching for a Steve that, technically, no longer exists, she might not be able to find him?

"What about Project NINA?" Steve asks, bringing all conversation to a halt.

"How do you know-" Dr Owens cuts himself off. "No, I know how. Better question. What happened that we needed to actually use Project NINA?"

Steve looks haunted again, like he does when he remembers the timeline he destroyed. "Vecna happens. Spring break of '86. I- we can't talk about that here. I think- he can get inside people's head. Read their minds."

No one says it out loud, but everyone's eyes go to El for a moment and she looks uncomfortable.

"What if," Steve starts, like he's having a realization himself, "what if the reason I can't be found is for my protection? Vecna can read minds, get in there and make you think things- what if I'm being protected by whatever sent me back? Vecna doesn't know that I know what he's up to, 'cause he can't read my mind and know what happens in the future. Can't stop me from trying to stop him! Project NINA is like, a bring back memories thing, right? Take me there. Set it up away from Hawkins and take me there."

They discuss some more, trying to say a lot without saying anything incase Vecna was listening in right now. That's a thought that will keep Eddie up for months.

It's gets decided on that El will go with, to be able to try and reach Steve while he's trying to find his own memories. Hopper is going with because he's not letting El go alone, and that's when Eddie speaks up.

"Then I'm coming, too."

"Eds," Steve looks torn, like he wants to smile and frown at the same time.

"No. If Hopper's going for El's emotional support, than I'm coming for yours."

It's decided. Dr Owens will work on Project NINA, and arrange for them all to be picked up when it was ready.

"One last thing," Steve says, "once you're away from Hawkins, call me. There's someone I don't want involved in this. He's done enough damage. Oh, also, invest in some goddamn swim caps. If you think you can shave my head, or anyone else's, for your dunk tank, then you're going to get hit."

That night, Steve finally tells him what happened. What Dr Owens and he had planned. Steve only told Dr Owens about the Fourth of July, wanted to only change the last possible moment for worry of alerting Vecna to what was happening, worried about Vecna changing the plan if he knew.

He talks about Billy being possessed, how Will was, too, once. Dr Owens thinks they've managed to do that for Billy, but just to be safe, they're taking Billy somewhere. Steve didn't ask, but they're telling his dad that he got a scholarship to some college or other, full ride kind of thing. Max knows the truth, but she also knows he's alive. And knowing he's alive means Max isn't going to pull away from her friends.

Steve says he hopes that means Max is saved.

Eddie learns that Steve and Robin are going to become insufferable best friends, so Eddie had better make peace with that now.

Ha takes it all in, listens as Steve tries to downplay what he went through with humor. Like it was easier to endure just because he knew it was coming this time. It does end with Steve crying, just repeating they lived, this time, no one died, they're fine. And Eddie's smart to enough to know Steve isn't meaning all the people who did become a giant flesh monster; he's talking about they people he cares about. Hopper, who apparently died-but-didn't-die, and Billy.

He learns that last time El lost her powers, probably due to losing Hopper. But she didn't lose Hopper, or even have to fight the giant flesh monster. With the plans Dr Owens made, they'd already stormed and cleared the Russian base below Hawkins. It wasn't Dustin and Erica who freed Robin and Steve from their restraints, but some US military men. They'd waited until the Mind Flayer attacked the mall, dropped down inside it before torching it. They still needed the mall to burn down - there was a Russian base below it, after all.

Once Steve is finished, Eddie kisses his forehead and maneuvers them down in bed so he can spoon him. Steve melts into his touch, pulling Eddie's arms more firmly around him. Steve likes to be the little spoon, Eddie's happy to learn.

"I'm going to come out to everyone. Before we leave," Steve says, long after Eddie thought he's already fallen asleep. "You don't have to. We don't have to tell them we're together, but I want them to know."

The thought terrifies Eddie. He's been beaten up for the assumptions, it's hard to him to imagine what might happen if that words are made true by speaking them out loud. "Can I think on that?"

"Of course."

-

July 15th, 1985

Eddie does think about it. He thinks about coming out to this little family they've cultivated and it's hard. Coming out to Wayne had been rough, and he was one person! And he'd told Jeff. But Gareth and Brian had just kinda... put the pieces together and told Eddie they didn't care who he liked so long as he never picked his boytoy over Hellfire night (and so far, Eddie hasn't!). Eddie can't imagine telling up to fourteen people all at once.

Fourteen separate people who could hate him.

But Steve seems so sure they won't. That he won't lose anyone when(if) he comes out to them. And fuck, the scariest part if that he kind of wants to. If he and Steve do this together, if they know they're together, he could hold his hand when they're all together. Sit as close as he wants to without the fear of being found out because they'd already know.

But if they aren't okay with it. Or they aren't okay with Eddie.

These people, this group, was Steve's first, so they might be willing to forgive Steve for his temporary lapse in judgment, but Eddie hadn't done anything to earn their trust. Respect. Willingness to not beat him to death for being gay.

And also, a tiny part of him is afraid of losing Steve if he can't commit to coming out.

"Steve," Eddie whispers as they sit on the couch, a movie playing but Eddie's not watching. "I'm scared."

"What?" Steve sounds so confused, and he quickly looks between Eddie and the movie. It's so enduring that Eddie must laugh about it, just a little.

"Not of Footloose. Of telling people. About us."

Steve's face softens and he looks so fond that Eddie aches. "That's okay, Eddie. You don't have to."

"But what if...."

"If?" Steve prompts.

"What if I'm never ready to come out? What if I- if we can't- What does it mean for us, if I never get there?"

"Oh," Steve says, like the thought that Eddie would never come out hadn't ever occurred to him. "Well, then I'll just be the bisexual who never dates again and lives with his best guy friend for the rest of his life."

That's like a gut punch in the best way. That Steve says it so easily, like he plans to stay with Eddie until he dies. Eddie can't fathom that. "Careful, Stevie. With words like that I might get ideas about you."

Steve looks serious now, but with a little upturn to his mouth. A small, secret smile. "Ideas, hmm. What sort?"

"That you might adore me."

"Well, I do adore you," Steve says simply, easily, "I love you, Eddie."

Eddie freezes because that's not- Steve couldn't possibly mean- that's. What. Eddie and he haven't even said the word boyfriend to each other yet and Steve's... Steve is looking at him with such fondness, adoration, love. Butterflies erupt in Eddie's stomach and as quickly as that little bit of dread had filled him, it's gone even faster. Eddie flings himself into Steve's lap, the need to kiss him until both of them are light headed is the only thing left inside Eddie.

Eddie doesn't say it back, can't really, but Steve must know because he keeps repeating it, with every breath Eddie allows him to take in between kisses.

The next morning, Steve wants to comes out to his found family at their Good Luck Project NINA BBQ, because Hopper, El, Steve, and he are going to be heading to Indianapolis that evening to be picked up by Dr Owens men tomorrow morning and everyone wanted a last get together.

Steve is fearless. Steve is fearless, and so strong, and he loves Eddie.

So, when he calls attention to everyone and starts the speech he rehearsed with Eddie, Eddie steps up. Slides his hand into Steve's, gripping it probably to the point of pain, but there. It doesn't matter how they'll react, because Steve loves him. And he loves Steve.

(And if he clocks Lucas and Max exchanging money about it, well, he can't even be mad about that.)

[spacecasehobbit]

Every so often, I find myself thinking of the kind of story that Billy could have had if it had been Neil who got flayed in S3, instead of Billy.

If it was Neil who went off to work one day, and came back Wrong... not because he came back mean, but because he came back too nice. Too calm, missing all the sneers and casual insults that are usually thrown Billy's way whenever they're in the same room; strangely unconcerned with Billy's life but too concerned with whatever Max and that new friend of hers are up to, instead of offloading "responsibility" for his step-daughter's every move to Billy under threat of violence if he doesn't make her stick to Neil's rules.

And Billy is the only one who notices just how wrong this all is.

Max listens to him about as well as she ever does - which is to say: not at all - when he tries to bring up Neil's behavior with her (admittedly, he probably brings it up with his usual amount of grace and tact, which is to say: also none). It's not like Billy can tell the cops that his dad is acting weird by being too nice, if he was even the sort of person who went to cops to solve his problems. He hasn't exactly cultivated the kind of friendships where they talk about his relationship with his shitty dad, either, so he's exhausted his extremely short list of people who might understand as soon as Max storms off in her usual cloud of pissy, righteous teenage anger at his inability to talk to her without being a dick right off the bat.

And like, he's not even entirely sure why he's bothering to try and understand this new leaf Neil's turned over? Shouldn't it be a good thing that his dad is mostly just ignoring him, that Neil's finally taking a bit of responsibility for the kid whose mom he decided to marry and play happy little family with in the first place?

It's just... it's weird, is all.

It's weird, and it grates at him, and he can't help but drag himself into this mess, looking for trouble even when it doesn't find him first as his dad likes - liked - to say whenever Billy got caught up in the consequences of his own poor decision making.

So long story short, Billy goes from the one always being watched to the one always watching his dad, discovers his dad may or may not be starting some kind of cult with all his (white, male, because the man's definitely got plenty of bigotry that Vecna's perfectly happy to play along with, as long as he gets his army somehow) coworkers, discovers that actually it may be a literal fucking Satan cult or some shit when some of those coworkers and/or his dad start bleeding black (and maybe he catches sight of that new friend of Max's displaying what are definitely magic fucking powers), and winds up stumbling into the midst of the Upside Down plot all on his lonesome just as things are coming to a climax with the melted-people-spidermonster at the brand new mall, of all places.

And maybe Billy's been doing some of his own rather difficult and unpleasant personal introspection and character growth, in between spying on his dad and discovering that his sister and her nerdy little friends know way too much about magic and monsters, but still can't seem to notice just how fucking weird her own step-dad is acting until he goes straight-up feral at their little magic friend, said magical friend shoves him through a brick wall with her brain, and he escapes without so much as a broken bone so far as Billy can tell from his vantage point, hidden what is suddenly looking like a much less safe distance away from whatever-the-fuck-that-was than he'd originally thought.

The point is, Billy's done some thinking of his own. Some growing as a person, even, one might say.

So by the time he follows his dad to the mall, he still honestly has no clue what the hell is going on, but he knows his dad has always been a bastard, and he knows that little magic kid his dad is dragging towards a horror movie spider monster the size of their house might be the only one who can save this stupid nonsense town full of monsters and cornfields and bullshit and maybe, possibly, a few people who don't deserve to die horribly in some insane alien monster apocolypse.

In this universe, instead of El making a last minute, desperate attempt to reach out to Billy with empathy before the Mind Flayer feeds her to the monster, it's Billy who steps in out of nowhere to distract his dad from this random little girl the monster seems to want so badly but isn't gonna get.

Because Neil's been acting weird. He's been ignoring his fuckup of a son, paying too much attention to Max and hasn't even called Billy a delinquent or an irresponsible fuckup or a faggot in nearly a week, and apparently he's possessed by a monster that might literally be from hell.

But Max seemed to think Neil was still somewhere in there when he went crazy on her little magic friend, and maybe she couldn't reach him, but Billy's spent half his life learning just how to push his dad's buttons and get Neil's attention lazer-focused on himself.

Pissing off Neil Hargrove is an artform that Billy's long since perfected.

It feels good to be doing it on purpose because he's trying to stand in front of someone else to keep them safe, for the first time since his mom left and he started thinking he had to care about himself first, since no one else was going to. Doesn't even feel afraid when he tells his dad loud enough for the peanut gallery to overhear that he was right all those years, he raised a filthy fucking faggot who likes dick instead of pussy, that he doesn't give a shit about respect and responsibility if those things are supposed to turn him into a Man like the one that Neil Hargrove's always been.

Billy's always been a disappointment to his father.

Somehow, that fact doesn't sting like it used to.

Now he's got proof his dad hates him enough to shake off a shadow monster from another world just to beat on his own kid, and Billy?

Billy meets his dad's rage with a fucking smile.

For once, his dad's hits don't hurt more than the ache of the physical bruises they'll leave behind, don't come packed with that extra kick of guilt and shame and longing for a dad who loves him. For once, he makes himself get back up, bloody teeth bared with all the feral hatred and rage fostered from years of living in fear of his own father, and he hits back at the man who was already a monster long before he ever got possessed by one from another world.

Billy was never gonna be the kind of son his father wanted, but it's on his own terms now. Because Billy's never gonna be the kind of man his father was, either.

And step one of being a better kind of person is making sure this stupid fucking town and his annoying bitch of a step-sister and all the other weird little nerds and annoying classmates she seems to hang out with and all the other blissfully ignorant hicks sensibly enjoying the 4th of July fair instead of fighting eldritch horrors in the mall, actually survive to see July 5th...

Even if that means fist fighting his dad in the mall while a little magic girl takes advantage of Neil's distraction to take on a melted flesh monster in the background of this brand new form of fucked up mess his life has somehow become.

[etherealfroggy]

jesus christ...idk how but while doing research on billy throughout the show, i came across billy apologists and i am now so fucking pissed.

these people can't accept that just because you have some sad uwu backstory doesn't mean you have the right to be an abusive, racist asshole. like they are literally jumping through hoops to somehow paint max as a bad person for the times where she stood up to billy (i.e. she shouldn't have drugged him when he was going crazy on them in s2 when there was literally no other way to calm him down and he looked HAPPY beating the shit out of steve). they're even complaining about how it's "bad writing" or "terrible for the show" that billy never got a (redemption) arc or a standalone plotline and that all he was was an antagonist and a bully.

Like...BABES THAT'S LITERALLY ALL HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE?? HE WAS CREATED TO BE AN ANTAGONIST AND THAT'S WHAT HE WAS. HE FULFILLED HIS NARRATIVE PURPOSE??

Sure, it might be tragic. Sure, there might have been potential for Billy to change. But not every single bad character needs to turn over a new leaf and be a better person. Not every character in a show needs to have their entire backstory explored. Not every character deserves that amount of sympathy. The only reason Billy existed as a character was to be an antagonist. And that's why he died one (just like jason - it could be argued that jason had justification for what he did but that doesn't change the fact that he did some fucked up shit and that doesn't mean it was "bad writing" for him to die without "redemption).

He was a bad person because he was created to be a bad person. Just 'cause you liked his potential or pitied his trauma, doesn't mean he deserves more from the show. Just because he showed a glimmer of good at the end, doesn't mean he was "redeemed" or that the writers had attempted to "redeem" him.

Do they have no understanding of stories and narratives and how characters fit into these things? It's such stupidity. And it makes me so angry that they would jump through all these hoops for a horrible, abusive character like him - if they can't recognise how wrong that is for a tv show character, how do they approach these kinds of people and situations irl? Like I understand people who write stuff about him working to be a better person - like actually being a good person. But the people who defend his actions and character within the show? Zero media literacy. Some of the things they say are sickening honestly and I needed to get it off my chest.

[reikunrei]

really intrigued by this new stage play delving more into Henry's past and how it will inform/add to what we've already gotten of him in s4, and what we may potentially get in s5, so i kinda just want to ramble lol.

the way i see it, and how we as an audience and how some or all of the characters are meant to view him, is not necessarily that he's the stereotypical "big bad" villain. sure, he's villainous and the overall antagonist, and while he displays extremely monstrous behavior, he's not the "monster" that Eleven envisions.

she has a very black and white view of good vs bad. she's been fighting with this for a while, especially internally and how she views herself. from season 1, she thinks she's "the monster." she opened the initial gate, which made Will go missing, killed countless others, and got all of her new friends in trouble.

in season 2, we kind of started to touch on the idea of what kind of behavior is "good or bad" when she meets Kali. they share an unfathomable bond and love each other dearly through their shared experiences in Hawkins Lab. Kali teaches her how to be stronger, that she shouldn't hide from her powers, she should use them to help herself. and El leans into it, allows herself to be fueled by her rage and sadness. but she hesitates. she wants to strengthen this bond with Kali, her sister, but it feels wrong.

she's killed people, yes, but it's different when it's in self defense in the heat of the moment vs ambushing someone who, while he did hurt them, is currently unawares. plus, there's other innocent children involved. he may have hurt her, but El knows the pain of losing a parent. that's what brought her there in the first place. she can't do that to someone else. her grief hurts, but any relief will be fleeting under the further pain she now causes. she doesn't want to be the monster.

in season 3, this topic is mostly only broached with Billy. Billy is not a good dude. in fact, he sucks major chode and has approximately zero redeeming qualities, and the only reason Max is so torn up about his death is because of survivor's guilt.

but still, in order to beat the Mind Flayer, El has to break through to him, so she finds those happy memories of him with his mom on the beach, and makes him remember that, makes him fight for his mom, rather than the hell he's been through for the last X number of years. he might be a fucking shitty asshole, but he can pull off one valiant deed to save those around him, because he doesn't want to entirely give in to his misery. he wants to remember those happy moments, and wants his mother to be happy, wherever she may be, and that means making sure this monster (the Mind Flayer) is dead.

(plus i guess it's also like a stand-in for his dad. Billy's been abused his whole life, and has become the abuser, and he's sick of all of it. so now, he finally fights back and stands up for his mom like he's always wanted to.)

season 4 is a fucking smorgasbord. they went so heavy-handed with the "good vs evil" "monster vs superhero" shit that it would be hilarious if it weren't totally understandable bc all of these characters are 14 years old and don't have a full grasp on the nuances of the world just yet. again, we get El worrying that she could be the monster, that she'll make everything worse, that she's the one to blame for everything. Mike, Dr. Owens, Will, Brenner, none of them can convince her that, no matter what she did or does, she is their "hero." Owens gets pretty close, he at least gets a few smiles out of her, but she's still uncertain.

she thinks she can no longer be the hero because she lost her powers, that now she's useless, and even if now she's like a "normal kid," she knows she'll never really fit in. but then, when she starts at Nina, she fears that her powers will make her the monster all over again. that she's already done something so monstrous that she won't ever be able to forgive herself.

enter, Henry and the truth. that he killed all of those children. that he was the one behind everything to do with the Upside Down. that he was the reason that Brenner started all of these experiments and built his little "family" in their prison.

so she says Henry's the monster. or rather, Brenner was the monster, and he built Henry into the formidable monster that he then became when he fledged into Vecna. she's now dead-set on blaming it all on those two men, and it all started with Brenner, her Papa. even so, when she's saying goodbye to him, she's receptive to his touch. she leans into his hand, she accepts his affection.

she is so close to getting it. no, Brenner is not a good man, but she did love him at one point, and she still does to some degree. she might say he's the monster, but i think she doesn't really believe that. she just wants to convince herself that it's true so she can find someone to blame, to make it easy, to make it black and white.

and then Henry pushes her closer to the truth! he says that, no, Brenner was not a monster. he was just a man. a mediocre man, who sought power in others. Brenner was just a person.

again, he may have done monstrous things in that lab, but he was not the monster that El wants him to be.

and that leads us to how she views Henry.

where we left off leaves it a bit gray for me. obviously she tries talking him out of all of it, to stop his plan, to leave her friend alone, etc. "you are not the monster, Henry." but he doesn't listen. he likes being the monster. he's good at being the monster. he feels entirely justified in his actions and believes he's helping. and he's so entrenched in his own pain that he doesn't see any need to stop now while he's so close to his goal. Henry even turns it back on El, saying that she was the reason Henry even became Vecna in the first place. so, again, she could be called the "true monster" here for being the major catalyst of it all.

i think if El had the chance in that moment, she would have killed Henry. she was terrified watching him kill one of her best friends, one of her only friends in the whole world. she's killed people to protect her friends before, she isn't going to stop now.

but she couldn't. she had to rely on the teens in the Upside Down to take out his body. and, obviously, that didn't work in the end.

we don't see El talk about it any further, but with all of these prior conversations and experiences, once she's out of the heat of the moment, i think she would not want to kill Henry. just like Kali, the two of them have a bond and their shared experience under Brenner. she sees Henry as a sort of role model, a guardian, an older brother. at least, she did when she became so devoted to helping him, but just like with Brenner, i don't think that's entirely gone away.

she's terrified of him, disgusted by him, horrified at his behavior, but she simply can't see him as the pure "monster" that she wants him to be. she has to start to realize that it will never be possible to group either of them into one category. and she has to learn that that includes herself.

Eleven very easily could have become "Vecna," so to speak. she was just lucky enough to have a support system when she escaped the lab. she found the right kids who would love and support her through it all, the good and the bad, so that even if she does monstrous things, they'll be there for her to help her pick up the pieces and fix it together.

Henry didn't have that. he hid himself away, didn't admit to his family when things were bothering him (or, if he did, they didn't give him the support he needed), and allowed himself to become jaded with anything and everything that inconvenienced him. after all, nobody was helping him fix it, so he has to do it all himself.

he was trapped. just a little kid stuck in an unsavory situation, perhaps aggravated by whatever "shadow" it was that was living in the Creel House and stoking this burning ember inside of him. he was upset, hurt, felt abandoned and lost, and lashed out. it's no different to the times that El killed people in self defense, though perhaps Henry had a smidge more premeditation.

regardless, the core of both of their behaviors is the same: wanting to get out of their cage.

El was just lucky enough to have friends, and Henry was unfortunate to not have any strong, loving bonds like he so craved and needed.

Kali is sort of a middle ground for me at the moment. she is somewhere between El and Henry. she's using her hurt and anger and sadness as fuel, like Henry, but she still finds light and love in the world with her friends and family, like El. she wants to hurt people, like Henry, but she understands that there's only specific people who deserve that hurt, like El.

Henry just wants to throw out the whole baby with the bath. sure, there's specific people he's upset with, but it was the whole world that was set up to make his life harder. he wants to take out everyone because he believes the flaw runs all the way to the roots.

Eleven and Henry are on opposite ends of the spectrum. Henry wants to only see the bad, and El only wants to see the good.

Henry was hurt and then left to wallow in it for his entire life with no one offering out their hand to him. so, if everyone else is going to be "evil," why shouldn't he? he finds power that way, makes himself stronger, so he relies on it to build himself up, to the point that he actively avoids the happy memories of his victims. he can't admit that there might be good in the world, because that would strip him of all of his power. his stance would suddenly have no foundation if he were to acknowledge that there is good and love and light mixed in with all of his grief.

with this play, we'll get a glimpse at the possible happy memories that Henry has. we'll find ammunition for El to use against him, to point at and go "see! you were happy! you can still be happy! you don't have to be the monster! you can choose to get better!" that he has other qualities he can nurture other than his hatred. like Billy, he can find the good in an otherwise shitty situation and hang onto it like a life raft.

i'm not entirely sure what to expect from, nor do i know what i really want out of, the ending of season 5. will they kill Henry? will they reform him? will Henry kill himself? will Henry sacrifice himself? there's many options, and i could have a field day going through the possibilities of all of them.

at the very least, i'm almost entirely convinced that El will not want to kill him. especially with a potential time skip leaving her lots of room off-screen to mull it all over. i think she will be determined to talk him out of it. i even get a kick out of the idea of Max being trapped in his head and rooting around in his memories, playing the Ghost of Christmas Past to dredge up his younger years and go "remember this? you were happy! it's not all bad all the time, here's the evidence!"

when it comes to the other characters, i think a lot of them will still want to kill Henry. he caused all of this, after all. he's actively trying to kill them, destroy Hawkins, and potentially drag the whole world into darkness. they have to kill him, right!?

i do believe that El could potentially convince some of them to not try to kill him. especially Will, but i need to stop myself from going on that tangent or this will turn into a 20 page essay lol.

but even if they do reform him, i don't know if i want an actual "redemption" for him. like, that's not really the right word, i don't think, but i am also stupid, so.

like, i think there's lots of room for El to admit that she has done monstrous things, but her friends still stand by her and work with her to fix anything and everything that she may have caused, deliberately or not, because they love her. and she wants Henry to understand that he is just the same as her, and he is also deserving of understanding and help in fixing anything wrong he may have done, whether deliberately or because he was pushed into it.

but i haven't quite worked out where he would stand if they kept him alive. like, i can imagine two paths for him right now off the top of my head:

they fight and Henry is gravely injured. El tries to convince him and it doesn't work. Henry is petulant and stubborn and stuck in his anger and pain, and he doesn't want to listen to this child, his protégé, talk down to him and try to boss him around. so, he kills himself because, if his plan is going to fail, he'd rather be dead.

El tries to convince him and it does work, but he's in too deep now. the plan is in motion, and the only way to stop it completely is his death. so, he sacrifices himself to close the gates and keep their worlds forever separated, saving the Right Side Up from its horrible fate, but losing his own life in the process.

i hadn't thought of the 2nd option until today, and i'm actually quite fond of it. could you imagine our big villain, the one behind all of the characters' misery and pain and death, actually working on their side to fix the mess he's made?

i can totally see Henry's death being framed as a big tragedy, like Barb or Bob or Eddie, rather than the triumphant "win" it otherwise could have been. their antagonist dies, and it's sad.

and even if it was something like Will landing the final blow and killing Henry, or him killing himself, or even El taking his life, it will all be sad, because El will have learned that Henry was not purely the monster of Vecna that they'd been envisioning. he was an ordinary boy, trying to live an ordinary life, and that was ripped away from him (again, like Will, but again, i have to control myself!!!).

i so badly want El to acknowledge that she could have become our story's "Vecna," and Henry always had the capacity to become like Eleven.

in this story, there is no "monster" and no "superhero." every single person is capable of great good and great evil at the same time, and El and Henry need to meet in the middle on that spectrum. if you aren't already, i think that by the end of season 5, every member of the audience will be sympathetic toward Henry Creel, because everyone will understand that we are all capable of becoming as "bad" as him, and even he is capable of becoming "good."

should Henry be forgiven? probably not. nobody owes him forgiveness. nobody should go "aww he saved the day in the end, he was good all along!" that's not the point. the point is that despite doing bad things, all of these characters are deserving of understanding. you don't have to forgive to understand.

i really am just so interested to see more of Henry's past in an objective manner, rather than through Victor's or Henry's memory. we'll get some real meat to chew on and humanize this man that has been unfairly placed into the cookie-cutter mold of "monster."

[dalekofchaos]

How do you feel about Billy Hargrove?

Honestly my feelings on Billy are this.

I hate him for how he treated Max, his racist antagonism towards Lucas, trying to murder a group of kids, nearly killing Steve. But I do understand why he is the way he is and do wish he could've at least had a character arc slowly but surely trying to get out of the cycle of abuse. But the Duffer Bros wanted him to be the human antagonist, like Henry Bowers from IT, but they wanted him to be Flayed and try to make him sympathetic. It's kind of hard to make the guy sympathetic when one season ago he was abusing his sister, antagonizing the one black kid he sees with Max and nearly killing Steve. Like the Duffer Bros wanted their cake and eat it too. And his "redemption" if you can call it that wasn't earned. He did the bare minimum by saving El. Max's sadness, while understandable, wasn't earned. They had no meaningful relationship, all we got from season 2 is abuse, mutual hatred and the ending was a sign he was gonna leave her alone. There is no scene of them together to show they remotely started fresh or any sign that Max forgave him. It felt forced and unearned.

It's like if Stephen King tried to pull a complete 180 and tried to woobify Henry Bowers and sacrifice himself to stop Pennywise. Yeah, that would've been fucking stupid if that happened.

And honestly? The conflict SHOULD HAVE been between Max and Billy in season 3, not El and Billy. They acted like Billy was never abusing Max or tried to kill the party and Steve and tried to whitewash Billy. El and Billy had no connection. Shouldn't it have been, you know HIS STEP-SISTER??? Like I know it was really between El and the Mind Flayer, but it also should have been Max and Billy. Like El could've taken Max with her to see Billy's past. Max uses the bat on Billy to save El, Billy has his attention on Max and Max should've have been the one to tell him about his mother and say "you were happy" to snap Billy out of it. Maybe throw in "you were hurt and broken, but that doesn't mean you have to be a monster. Don't be what he made you." something like that. The point is, it should have been between Max and Billy.

If Billy didn't die and Max and Billy could've started fresh. Or hell throw in a scene of Neil threatening Max and have Billy stand up for Max, that to me would've been Billy breaking the cycle and choosing not to be what Neil made him to be. If Billy made amends to Steve and the party, then that would've been redemption. But what they did wasn't. Doing the bare minimum and dying isn't redemption.

Instead of that predatory cringe fest scene, if the beginning of season 3 had Billy like make amends to Max, Steve and the party before becoming the Mind Flayer's puppet, maybe I would feel sympathy for what happened to him. But I see Billy as wasted potential but also don't like or forgive him cause he never earned that from me.

[ladylannisterxo]

WA: Exactly! Since many details in the show aren't officially confirmed, people can believe what they want unless proven otherwise - not that it stopped fans before. When I imagined the scenario of Billy gifting Max, I had this thought of him leaving the skateboard on her bed to find from him because he might have been too awkward to give her when he did try apologizing. I don't know why that. And yes! That was a scene between them that made think of their relationship changed. And scenes in S3.

I guess that's the beauty of them only giving us so much to work with, we can create whatever we want to fill the gaps.

I think your idea with him just leaving the new board on her bed is pretty in character for him like, he doesn't want to make a big deal out of it. Maybe Max comes home and sees it and her first thought is that her mom bought it for her and she's super thrilled but then maybe, Billy passes by her door and they make eye contact and without a single word being uttered, she knows it was him that bought it and he was just passing by to make sure she got it and that she was happy.

Truly, I love relationships where literally nothing has to be said; where they just get each other and I'm sure that's an easier bond to form with blood-related siblings but it's not impossible for step-siblings to figure each other out. Like, and more so in S2, but I think Max understands Billy a lot more than she lets on (and definitely more than he probably understands her at that point) because that scene where she's talking to Lucas and she says, "Billy's always been a dick but now he's just angry all the time", that implies to me that back in California, it probably wasn't as bad as it is in Hawkins.

I mean, yeah, he was most likely an ass and he said and did things he probably shouldn't have but getting uprooted from your life, the one that you've know from the start, and being dropped into Hawkins, Indiana as a senior in high school, oooof, that's rough. You basically have to start all over and for what? I mean, he really doesn't have any friends and there's fuck all to do in Hawkins and his home life didn't change, dad is still very much an asshole so what the hell is he supposed to do? I know people hate on Billy for his anger but it really makes a lot of sense and I don't blame him for being as angry as he is, I think I would be too.

Lol sorry, this response went all over the place!!

[strangerthings4theories]

Hello, I was curious to know more of your thoughts about Billy and Max, especially about what do you think their relationship will be like after they are reunited and how "defeating Neil" will fit into that. Thank you! <3

Oh my, you just asked one of the BIG questions! Haha my answer is gonna be longggg~~

Well, before we can predict what their relationship will be like, we have to establish what their relationship has been like so far. That may seem unnecessary, but imo people misread it pretty badly. As it turns out, Neil is central to their dynamic; Billy's fear of him colors everything, including how he treats Max.

For all his protests that "she's not my sister," Billy absolutely views Max as family. He sees his mother in her, and that drives his actions in S2. We know this from several pieces of evidence, most of which didn't become clear until we saw his memories in S3.

1) These two moments parallel each other.

In the first shot, Billy is standing behind his mom, looking past her at Neil. His mom has just thrown a plate to defend herself, but it didn't accomplish anything, and now Neil's poised to attack her. Billy's rushing forward to stop him.

In the second shot, Billy is standing behind Max, looking past her at Lucas. Max was just yelling at him for some reason - Billy doesn't know why - and now Billy's bristling. In the car, he fixates on one question: "Is he causing you trouble?" When she doesn't answer truthfully, he gets angry and orders her to stay away from Lucas. "There are certain types of people in this world that you stay away from. And that kid, Max? That kid is one of them."

Is this a racial comment? You can interpret it that way, and sure, racism could play a part somewhat. Given how "Neil-haunted" this scene is, though, I don't think racism is the main source of Billy's fear. He doesn't mean "certain types of people" as in black people. He means men who upset you, attack you, make you feel unsafe. If Max had been arguing with a girl, he wouldn't have reacted so strongly.

In an aggressive, emotionally-hamstrung way, he's trying to save Max from his mother's fate. She's young, meaning there's still hope for her. If he can pass on the lessons he's learned, teach her to take no shit and treat men with suspicion, maybe she'll be okay.

Runaway Max supports my reading:

Billy talked to me, but in this sly, confidential way, like there was something important he wanted me to understand. It was like he hated me, except for the way he went out of his way to make me just like him. Any hint of softness and he would never let me forget it. (p 52)

Sometimes, though, Billy acted like we were in on some big, crucial secret together. Like we understood each other, like he was so worried about me. And that was worse. I knew he wasn't really worried. He'd just found one more way to mess with me. (p 129)

The second quote comes on the heels of Billy yelling at her about Lucas. It tells us Max senses his worry, even though she writes it off as an act.

And then there's this...

2) Billy's relationship with Neil haunts the entire Byers house sequence in S2.

Let's set the scene. Neil has just punished Billy for failing to watch over Max. Billy rejects responsibility, arguing, "She's thirteen years old, she shouldn't need a full-time babysitter!" We can detect some resentment here if we remember how quickly Billy was forced to grow up. (He definitely didn't have a babysitter at age thirteen.)

Still, earlier scenes have informed us that, on some level, Billy's always afraid for Max's safety. He's convinced men will hurt her if he doesn't intervene. So getting chewed out by his father for failing to protect her has to sting.

When Billy arrives at the Byers house, he's carrying a toxic stew of anger, resentment, and fear. And who does he see first, standing at the door, blocking access to his sister?

Steve. A young man Billy's age.

This is where Billy really starts to lose it. As he talks to Steve, he's physically trembling and twitching, like he's feeling a slow-motion explosion of rage. (Watch the clip carefully and you'll see what I mean.) A lot is going on in his head, more than he understands, but his dialogue clues us in to some of it.

"This whole situation, Harrington, I dunno. It's giving me the heebie-jeebies."

"Oh yeah? Why's that?"

"My thirteen-year-old sister goes missing all day, and then I find her with you, in a stranger's house... and you lie to me about it."

Kill mode engaged.

Picture the situation from Billy's perspective. He has no clue about the Upside Down or the Mind Flayer. As far as he's concerned, Steve and Max shouldn't even know each other's names, let alone hang out with each other. So, with the understanding that Billy suspects men - all men - of secretly being abusive pieces of shit, we realize he's not just blowing smoke here. He believes Steve is an actual threat to Max.

This taps into Billy's deepest fear: that Neil was right about him. He failed to protect his sister, just like he failed to protect his mother... because he's a pussy.

"What, did I raise a pussy for a son?"

That's why he goes bonkers. Shoving Steve down, antagonizing Lucas, and finally attacking Steve outright. He's lashing out, desperate to prove Neil wrong. He's not a pussy. He can protect his family from harm. He can.

To further explain his emotional state, Neil and his mom are echoed viscerally throughout the scene. In his actions, Billy replays things he's seen - and felt - them do.

>>Billy slams Lucas into a shelf. Neil did the same to Billy earlier.

This tells us Billy lumps Lucas in with men like his father. Subconsciously, he's doing what he wishes he could've done to Neil: turn the tables. Slam him into a bookshelf. Yell at him to "stay away from her!" (his mom in the past; Max in the present).

"Stay away from her. You hear me?"

>>When he's backed into a corner, Billy throws a plate at Steve like his mom did at Neil.

This tells us two things: (1) Billy lumps Steve in with Neil too, and (2) he's flashing back to that memory, whether he realizes it or not. It's seared so deeply into his mind that he can't help but relive it. And here, he feels he's in the same position as his mother, defending herself against an abuser.

It's easy to miss all of this. On the surface, Billy's just a bully who's making our heroes suffer. But beneath the surface, his motives are nuanced, complicated, even tragic. That's why he's such a compelling character.

He doesn't hate Max. He wants to protect her against a world he sees as cruel and untrustworthy. Sadly, he's so broken that he doesn't know how to do it without hurting her. His fear of monsters has driven him to become a monster himself.

It makes me think of Kali's speech to El:

"I decided to play the part [of a monster]. To stop hiding. To use my gifts against those who hurt us."

In Billy's world, as in Kali's, the only way to survive is to play the part. And just like Kali tries to teach El this lesson, he's trying to teach it to Max.

--

Okay wowwww, my answer got even longer than I expected. 😅 I'll end it there and pick it up again in a reblog or stand-alone post. So keep an eye out for that. ✌️

[withoneheadlight]

ok i saw this cap of zoë kravitz in hf and she's got such a dreamy expression, she looks so deeply self-absorbed and infatuated by whatever she's imagining and those lines. and i couldn't stop picturing billy exactly like that for days so,

,

There’s a pretty unusual sound coming off the house when Max comes back home, that summer afternoon.

Full volume. Walls shaking. And she quietly walks to the source of the sound, holding back her breath right in front of Billy's room because, there's this second sound? Stranger and way more unsettling and Max's not sure-sure at first but then Steve Perry’s voice takes off and Billy’s follows it and then he's like, singing along and. Well. Max did know Billy liked Journey but not like, their 'stuff for pussies' but uhm, he does, apparently. Rasps his voice all the way through ‘Faithfully’. Kind of, sighs. Longingly? When it ends? But pfff, ok, big brothers are weird. Definitely weirder after being possessed and then kind of resurrected. Even if it's in a good-weird way but, whatever. So Max's just about to sneak to her room, dutifully rolling her eyes, steps muffled by the first chords of 'Edge of the blade' when―

Click. Click. Billy stops the tape. Click. Takes it out. Tap. Tap. Click. Puts on― Billy puts. On,

Heaven.

Bryan Adams’ Heaven.

And Max―

Being a younger sister is a meticulous kind of full-time, private detective job. You gotta learn how the person you’ve been watching so carefully for years and years works. Hafta develop some sort of―sense about your target. And Billy’s been—un-Billy-like? These past two months. Smiling more. Telling more jokes. Playing ‘You shook me all night long’ in a loop on their drive to school and back, not complaining at all but even joining when’s Max who can’t help but sing along so.

So. She retraces her steps. Knocks. Takes the distracted grunt she gets as a ‘Yeahyeah, c’mon in c’mon in’ and,

Creak. Creak. ‘―baby you’re all that I want’

“Billy?”

Billy’s sitting cross-legged on the floor. Radio close to his knees. Cassettes scattered everywhere. Piles and piles of breakwater surrounding Billy’s old, rusty beacon of sound. He’s reading through the song-list of one of the tapes, a smoke locked on the corner of his mouth, bouncing up and down with every little, absent suck he takes, and he looks. He looks―

Self-absorbed and even. Relaxed. Happy. Like whatever he’s thinking about right now is actually carrying his thoughts away to fucking heaven.

“Ehh”

“Uh-hu?”

‘When you’re lying here in my arms!’

“Billy are you. What―” ‘I'm findin' it hard to believe. We're in heaven’ “What are you doing?”

But there’s this orbit around the sun and then there’s whatever one Billy's been spinning along with the last couple of months so he completely ignores her question. Shakes the tape on his left hand. Picks another one from the pile on his right. Asks her.

“Is Billy Ocean too much? ‘Cause I think it’s too much. But it kind of fits into what I'm trying to say so” he says, shrugs, looking up at Max and waiting for the answer of what she realizes was not really a question. Not at all. So she does her little sister job and just, nods “Right. That’s good. I think it’ll slide just nicely into Bruce Springsteen and―”

“Billy” Max insists, waiting for the charm of the third time to work. It doesn’t. Not really. But keeps Billy's eyes on her long enough to squeeze an “A mixtape?” And, uh. That’s what gets it on. The charm “Are you making a mixtape?”

“Uh?”

And it’s like Max just shook Billy out of a daydream. Ash plopping down from his cigarette as his lips try but can’t purse and Max― she’s good. She’s stellar at this detective thing. Recognizes an opening the moment she sees it, right there in front of her, frozen in the middle of shaking Billy Ocean and Bruce Springsteen in the air right before cocktailing them together. Shaken, not stirred, please. Max’s upgraded to James Bond-level just right now.

“You’re making a mixtape for someone”

“Oh-nonoMaxi―”

“But you didn’t have those tapes before. Not even in your secret stash”

“How do yo―?”

“Holy. ShIT. You’ve been listening to somebody else’s music” This is. Oh, God. This. Is. GOLD. Max gotta take a moment. Blink. Breathe. Process. Her hands move by themselves, palms spread toward Billy in a wait-a-minute kind of gesture except. Max’s gonna need way more than a minute for this “You’ve accepted a music recommendation”

“Maaaaax”

“Gosh, you’ve even listened to the tapes enough to. Make―”

“Max!”

“I just can’t believe it”

And Max was glad. Well. As glad as one can be. Bunch weeks ago. Her mom and Neil out for the day. Coming back home a little earlier than she usually does to hear those ugh. Those other noises. Happy screams. Again. After months and months of Billy being basically alone except for her and the party and Steve. And Max’s so glad, of course she is. But she’s also a little sister. And all this investigation work has a high, rightful purpose.

Make her big brother’s life a living. Hell.

“Oh my god, you must be so gone!” Max brings her hands to her mouth. Takes a deep, deep breath that’s more a poorly restrained giggle. Shoots her index at him “Is it Bon Jovi? What I’m seeing right there? Goddam, Billy are you in lo―”

Bam.

Bam. Bam!

The front door.

What a way to spoil the fun. Max doesn’t have time for this. She’s working.

“BILLY?” comes a voice from the other side “Billy are you in there?”

Steve.

Oh.

What a way to make the fun a hundred times better.

Bam.Bam.Bam!

She’s starting to move to get to the door, sinsonging “Well, I guess Steve’s gonna find out you’re so stupid in love you’re willingly listening to―” when she realizes Billy’s eyes have widened and he’s jerkingly trying to unfreeze, he’s mumbling something in around his already extinguished cigarette in the ways of “Can’t” and “Find out” and “Surprise” and “Fucking help me!” While literally trying to shove the huge mass of tapes under his bed, his tone like hurryhurryhurry!, like he would start gagging and throwing his lungs out at any given minute, so nervous he looks.

So Max doesn’t go for the door. Yet. She basks in the enjoyment.

“Oh, is it a secret romance or something?” She sighs happily, leaning against the doorframe instead. “‘Cause you look pretty worried”

Steve’s banging the door now, voice wavering a little as he asks-shouts “Billy? Billy answer me! Hey, bab―Are you ok?”

“Max, please” Billy begs. Begs. Crawling over to where a Madonna’s Like a virgin is laying with the tape looping slightly out “He really can’t find out”

“What? That you’re in lo-o-oh-oh-OH―”

Billy stops at the tone, right there on his knees. Spits his forgotten cig to the side. And in the instant it seems to take him to make up his mind they both can hear Steve shout “Ok. I know you’re in there!. I’m coming in now!!”

“Fuck! Yeah. I am. Ok?” he looks like he just realized he’s tripped. Blushes. “Making it, I mean”

BAM!

And Ohhhhhhh.

Zero-fucking-zero-fucking-seven.

“Steve,” Max gasps. Because. Hear it makes it like. Easier. To process “You. And Steve”

B A M!

“Yeah, Max, Yeah. And this is a fucking surprise and he’s gonna―”

‘I've been waitin' for so long. For somethin' to arrive. For love to come along’

Ok. Oh. Okok.

“Door!” Max hastens him.

“What?”

“You. Door. Run!” She commands, and Billy― sometimes Max can’t honestly understand how he's got the grades he's got, because Billy blinks, looks clueless “C’mon slow ass. Hurry! I’ll hide all this shit”

And Billy finally gets it. Nods. Slow. Then fast. Stumbles up. Literally runs, to get to the door.

Max still gets to hear his labored “Fuck, pretty boy. “That was really hardcore of you. That's how bad you wanted to see me?” And Steve's own breathless “Really?” Before pushing Billy's room door close with her back, and kneeling on the floor to check for stray, incriminating cassettes.

Pretty boy. Maybe Max isn't as clever as she thought she is. Or hasn’t been doing her job right, clearly.

It's when she’s making ‘It’s a kind of magic’ disappear into the rest of the pile that she lays eyes on it. The case. The J-card written almost all the way down to the B-side already. A mixture of songs Billy's heard so many times there are parts where his tapes screech, and others she'd bet her life he wouldn’t have deigned to listen to. Not ever. Definitely not because―no, for, somebody. Bowie and Cher and Cindy Lauper and Bob Seger right next to Metallica and Guns n' Roses and Meatloaf and― there. There. Almost hidden in the back of the spine. A note. A tiny, thin-lettered thing Max really, really shouldn't be reading but―

‘Thanks for driving me back.

Love. Billy’

But. That's what little sisters do too, she guesses. Intrude. Annoy. Snoop. Feel this sudden rush of relief. Of happiness. When Billy laughs softly, on the other side of the door. When Steve laughs back. Maybe a tear. Or two. But just maybe. She’s really good at this little sister thing, after all.

Hopes for stellar.

,

or: that post s3 where steve lets a camaro-less billy drive him around in his own car "really? again, hargrove?" almost every single day, for months, after he comes back, because "you’re gonna perpetually stick yourself to my ass at least let me do the one thing that frikin’ calms me down" which results in steve resigning himself to deejaying in the shotgun even if "jesus, what's that shit, harrington?" "my car, my rules, sweetheart" which results in billy developing a ‘songs steve harrington is in love with’ mental playlist, realizing he’s probably a little bit in love with the way he loves them and, possibly, a little much love with steve and then stealing steve's tapes one day and,

making a mixtape about it.

(the first of a whole lot, of love letters)

[imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl]

The Perfect Bad Boy (Pt. 14 of 18)

Pairing: Billy Hargrove X Reader

Word count: 3 K

Summary: Working as a lifeguard in the Hawkins Community Pool, you try to fit in after moving from New York. Things were going pretty well when you notice you've been under someone's stare. Billy Hargrove, Hawkins' bad boy, has been staring at you since day one. You never intended to have anything to do with him, judging by the reputation he has. But Billy won't leave you alone, determined to show you his feelings are different this time...

As if your heart flooding you with confusing feelings wasn't enough, there are weird, strange animals lurking in the woods... But those have to be just part of the wild live of the woods surrounding Hawkins... Right?

<- Previous part (13)

Next part (15) ->

{Stranger Things Masterlist}

×

Hunt and Destroy

“Alright... A lot of new words and names...” You mutter, looking at the floor between your feet. It's late now, and Eleven has been talking for over an hour. The story is long and you had to stop her to ask a few questions. More than a few, actually. Everything sounds like a very strange story, the weirdest, something nobody could come up with. To prove it, Eleven turned the TV on with her mind, skipping through the channels before turning it off again. But you didn't need any proof. You know what you saw and it was very, very real. “Upside down, Demodog, Demodorden...”

“Demogorgon. With a G.” Dustin corrects you, smiling. How can he be smiling?

“Demogorgon, ok.” Nodding, you take a deep breath and stand up. “So... What's the plan?” You ask, pacing around the living room.

“Well, we need to gather the whole party for this,” Max says and the others nod.

“I'll talk to my mom and Hopper,” Jonathan speaks out. “We have to do this as soon as possible so... tomorrow.”

“Yeah. Can it be here?” You're not sure if you can make this demand, but right now, being anywhere else after dark is too much. The sunlight is your protection since it's deadly to the... Demo-something. It burns them. They like it cold, said Eleven.

“Sure.” Jonathan answers and you offer him a small smile in return. “Could it be by five? Before the sunset.”

“Yeah. We can sneak out of the pool again.” It shouldn't be a problem, and if Anthony is there, you could pretend to be sick.

“Tomorrow is our day off.” Billy reminds and you take a deep breath, running a hand through your hair. You completely forgot that.

“By the morning them. Maybe we'll get something figured out we can start working on through the rest of the day.” Mike suggests and the whole party agrees. “We should get going though. It's late.” Mike gets up from his spot on the floor.

“Wait.” Mike can't possibly be for real now. “You're not gonna head home now. With those things out there.” They're getting closer to the town, and it means they'll hang around all night. “It's dangerous. You should stay.”

Most of them agree easily, chattering among them. Max seems excited, but Mike exchanges a look with Nancy. “I don't think our mother would let us crash at Billy's place.” She says with an apologetic look.

“Oh.” You know why. Billy told you where he was going to when the Mind Flayer almost got him... Or better saying, who he was going to meet. Mrs. Wheeler. You did felt weird back then, and it sure makes you feel weird now, but whatever he did before, you left it where it belongs. In the past. “Just call and tell her you'll be crashing at my place.”

“Yeah, man. C'mon. Slumber party.” Dustin cheers, smiling, and once again you can't understand why they aren't terrified. Guess they're just used to it. But how can someone get used to monsters lurking around?

“Alright, then.” Mike agrees, making his way to the phone.

“They didn't get it yet,” Billy whispers in your ear.

“They didn't get it.” Repeating, you wrap your arms around his neck. “I'm really trying not to freak out right now.” The words come out of your mouth, rolling out your tongue.

“Let's go to the bedroom so you can rest and we can talk.”

“Ok...”

“Alright. It's done.” Mike comes back with his sister, gesturing at the front door. “Should we get going?”

You and Billy exchange a look. They really didn't get it. “Uhm... So that's it, guys.” You start, taking Billy's hand and pulling him with you. “You can crash either here or Max's room. First to wake up makes breakfast.”

“Wait. You made me lie to my mom?” Mike asks as you move further into the hall.

“(Y/N) is living here.” Max ends the mystery, and you can feel her massive eye roll.

“Holy shit.” You hear Dustin and Steve mumbling as you get inside the room.

Billy lets you shower first, and as you wait for him, you look through his college books. Everything seems very complicated. Your fingers run through one of the pages, taking in the many numbers, but not really reading anything. Your mind is too far away right now. The scene keeps playing back, over and over. The... Demodog, as the kids call it, its face opening up, the guttural noises it made. You wish it was just a nightmare, but everything seems very, very real.

Billy's sudden touch makes you suck in a sharp breath, shaking a little. “Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you.” The feeling is quickly replaced by the usual warmth he makes you feel. Safety and comfort.

“It's ok, I'm just... How is it possible that the kids seem to be so fine with it?” Turning around, you lay your head on his chest as he pulls you close.

“They've been through a lot. They know how to deal with it and you don't have to participate if you don't want to.” Billy touches your face, fingers caressing the soft skin of your jaw. “I'll do anything to keep you safe, you know that right?”

You do. But staying out would not only make you a coward, but it would mean one less person to help them do whatever they're planning to. And, whatever this thing is, it had a part in messing with Billy's life. With Max's life, and all her friends. It's kind of personal. And, if Billy is in danger, you want to be there to make sure you'll do anything to save him. “I want to do it. I just need time to... Process everything.”

“You won't be alone. And I'm not talking only for myself, but for everyone else too.”

“Ok.”

“Now come. You need to get some sleep.” Billy pulls you to the bed, and, instead of laying beside him as usual, you decide to crawl on top of him.

“Am I crushing you?” You ask as you lay your head on his chest, smiling to feel his strong arms around you.

“Haven't you noticed the weight I can lift? You're nothing compared to it.”

Closing your eyes, you feel as he places a kiss on the top of your head. You've never been like that with Billy, literally on top of him, and it's good. Today, more than ever, you need to feel safe. Protected. And he's the only one who makes you feel this way. “I'm so happy we don't have to go to work tomorrow.”

“Me too.”

Pulling yourself up, you move upwards until your face is close to his. “Do you think the kids are talking about us?” Despite your mind being apparently stuck reminiscing the same moment, the terror in your chest, you try to change the subject. Hopefully, it'll keep you from having nightmares tonight.

“I'm sure of it.” As he speaks, a noise of glass shattering reaches us. “Max!” Billy yells at the top of his lungs, startling you. “What the hell!”

“Stop yelling.” You giggle, playfully slapping his shoulder.

“Just a glass, Billy,” Maxine answers from somewhere in the house.

“Better clean this shit up!” He shouts again.

“Shut up!” You whine, lowering yourself on him a little. “Or else I'll have to make you and it won't be nice.”

Billy raises an eyebrow, that usual smirk making its way to his lips. “Oh, and how exactly wouldn't it be nice?”

Yeah, you didn't really give much thought before making the threat. “Okay then.” Smirking, you close the distance between you until your lips are brushing on his before you sit up abruptly, a hand covering his mouth. “See? I told you it wouldn't be nice.” He opens his mouth under your hand, and you feel his teeth biting your skin. “Billy!” You complain, taking your hand away from his mouth. “I can't believe you bit me, you jerk.”

“You got what you deserved.” He suddenly pulls you down, making you lay next to him. “Now, quit playing around and sleep, princess. Tomorrow will be a long day.”

“Kiss me goodnight then. To keep the bad dreams away.” You ask him softly, melting into the slow, warm kiss he gives you.

It doesn't help with the nightmares though. Twice that night you wake up, a breath caught in your throat. You struggle not to let Billy notice, snuggling closer to him.

You're more than happy when morning finally comes. The house is so damn loud, and breakfast in a mess. You like it though, the craziness distracting you from yesterday's events. The rest of the party is here by nine, thanks to the urgency of the matter. And then, after everyone is fed up and the dishes are clean, which took half an hour since nobody wanted to do it, everyone sits in the living room to talk.

And you just can't seem to keep up with it. The boys speak fast, Hopper yells, Joyce tries to calm him down, he argues with Eleven, which is like his daughter, you got that, and then he argues with Mike. Nancy and Jonathan always check with each other before saying something, Steve always finds the flaws on the kids' plans, pointing out the many ways it could go wrong, and Dustin often gets into some kind of argument with him. There are a hundred different ways things could go wrong. A thousand ways you could die. Running a hand through your hair, you hold onto Billy's biceps, laying your head on his shoulder. You're the only one who didn't say anything since the conversation started. There's just nothing you can help them with, you'll just stick up to whatever plan they have.

What they know for sure that these Demodogs are here because some of them must have been left behind in some kind of incubation period until it started growing again.

“So that's it. Hunt and destroy.” Lucas says, nodding to himself.

“Yes. We don't know exactly how much time we have until they start going full Demogorgon, so we should start acting now.” Mike states. “Immediately.”

As if something was lit up, everyone starts moving. “My place in one hour, everyone,” Hopper says and suddenly the crowd disperses, the house once again silent.

You're still in the same place you were, on the couch, legs crossed, eyes on the floor. “Hey. You ok?”

“Yeah.” Taking a deep breath, you stand up. “So. Hopper's place. One hour.” Saying this more to yourself than to him, you get up and pace around the living room. “Should we take the baseball bat?”

“Steve has one far more fun than that. You'll like it.” You can tell Billy is keeping his voice nice and soft, trying not to push you over the edge with everything that's going on. “(Y/N), you don't have to go. You know that, right?”

“I do. But I'm going anyway.” Walking over him, you tiptoe to place a kiss on his lips. “Those kids are so brave. I don't want them to think I'm the weak link.”

“Alright, but we stick together. No exceptions.”

“I agree.” It does make you feel a lot better.

In the next hour, you and Billy shower and get ready. You make sure to wear short jeans and a light shirt so you won't feel too hot. The plan is trying to find the Demodog's nest. This part has to be made during the daylight, to make sure no attacks will happen, so you have no choice but to walk around the woods under the sun. Billy makes sure to shove a lot of water on his backpack, using literally every bottle he found in the house. And Max gathers some snacks for the day.

You reach Hopper's place at the same time Nancy, Jonathan, and Mike does, realizing it's also Joyce's place. The party is gathered in front of the house, a big map of Hawking on the ground. Beside it, a pile of some random stuff that you guess will be the... Weapons you'll use. Just in case.

Hopper is the one to assign everyone a place to start, the area they'll have to cover, and where they'll have to stop. There are lines drawn over the map, and you hope Billy has everything memorized because you don't even know where is where. Then, the groups are separated. Billy of course says he'll take you and Max. And Lucas, much to his dismay, will come along too. When people start taking stuff from the pile, you immediately get what Billy mentioned earlier. There's a baseball bat with nails on the top. Smiling, you take it.

“That's so badass.” You mutter, looking at Billy. “This will be my weapon of choice.”

“Hey. That's mine.” Steve exclaims, reaching out his hand.

“Not anymore, buddy.” You sass at him, swinging the bar and hitting the air.

“But–”

“She's good with the bat, trust me,” Maxine says and you nod. Some people have an interrogation on their faces, and Steve keeps staring at the three of you, as if waiting for further explanation.

“We have an inside joke.” Lowering the bat, you turn to look at Billy.

“Restricted to the Hargrove family,” Billy states, taking one the radios from the pile and starting the make his way to the car. “And Max.”

“But what about me?” You feel a little set aside by his affirmation, wondering what he meant. It's impossible that he's ignoring the fact that you were there that day. “I'm in the joke too.” Whining a little on purpose, you follow him.

“You still only notice half of things.” Billy winks at you as he gets inside the car, and after Max and Lucas get in the back seat, you get in as well. “I know you know what I meant.”

“Maybe I didn't.” Billy has this way with you. You were expecting the first sensations to fade, but they didn't. He still makes you nervous, the butterflies on your stomach doesn't seem to grow immune to him. And part of you is still scared of the things you think he means. You did got what he said, but it's safer to just pretend you didn't, right?

The short drive is filled with chattering. The kind of chattering you didn't want to hear since it's all about the Demothings. You stop by the woods, and Max and Lucas will be the ones responsible for the map since they have a compass.

And so the ‘hunting’ starts. You're glad it's not a real hunt though. You remember when you invited Billy for a trail with your friends, but walking through the woods feels different now. Before, you had only the normal wild animals to worry about, not some monsters that came out of the gates of hell. But you try to keep in mind that the sunlight means protection, so you'll safe. For now.

“Billy, can you make sure we'll have enough daylight to make the way back to the car?” You ask him, putting your hair up on a ponytail.

“I will, don't worry.” He moves closer, taking your hand in his. “We'll be ok. Just focus on trying to find anything unusual in the woods.”

“Sure.”

Billy doesn't let go of your hand until you stop to eat something. Lucas and Max start arguing a lot when you resume your walking, complaining about the directions. Billy is clearly pissed, not very fond of the idea of his little sister dating. It's cute the way he keeps staring at the young couple, paying attention to whatever they're saying. You wonder if Billy ever thought about having kids.

Wait. What the hell? Step back, you tell yourself. Too soon for that.

At some point, a fresh breeze starts blowing, and you couldn't be more thankful for it. Letting your hair down, you run a hand through it out of nervousness.

“I'm telling you, we have to go West now,” Lucas says.

“Yes. First West then North.” Maxine takes the map from his hands, taking a look at it. “It's obvious if you think about it. Just look. Try using your head for a moment.”

“Are you calling me dumb?”

“Yes!”

“Alright, both of you.” Billy intervenes, his voice with a tiny hint of anger. “Will you two make a goddman decision or will I have to?”

This will be interesting. Billy and you have been walking a couple of feet behind them, so as he moves ahead, you stand there, crossing your arms. The breeze brings a soft sound, that looks like the sound the pools make when it's windy. Following it, you spot water, only about ten feet away. Leaving the guys behind to their fights, you make your way there, making sure there are no big trees hiding you from their sight. When you get there, you bend down, putting one hand on the freshwater.

“(Y/N)!” It's Billy's usual yell, the one he always uses to scare the shit out of you. “Do you want to give me a heart attack?” When you turn around to look at him, he's already close by, Maxine and Lucas coming right after.

“Sorry, but I found this lake.”

“Lover's lake,” Max says, sitting down on a rock, eyes on the map.

“Lover's lake?” You repeat, crossing your arms and looking at Billy. “Why haven't you ever brought me here?” By the name, you think it would be a nice romantic date. And you remember by what you saw on the map, the lake is shaped like a heart, the reason for the name.

“Oh, you're new here. Sometimes it slips my mind.” He puts he bag down, safely away from where the small ripples reach. “People usually come here to... You know. So I thought that if I brought you and then you found out what really happens here you'd come to the wrong conclusion about my feelings for you.”

That's a very good explanation. And it makes you feel... Special. Different. “Thank you, then. For... Having this in mind.” As you speak, you take off your white shoes, all dusted by now.

“What are you doing?” He asks, an eyebrow raised when you look up at him, using his arm for balance to take off the other shoe.

“I'm using the Lover's Lake to something else than making out.” You start walking backwards, into the water.

“Whoa, look at what (Y/N)'s doing,” Lucas says, and you give them a glance. Max giggles, putting the map down.

“Try to drown Billy, would you?”

“I'll do my best.” When you stare back at Billy, he's already in the water.

You move back until your feet stop touching the bottom, so you start swimming further away. The freshwater is a blessing, washing the hot day from your skin. For a moment, you decide to leave the worries behind, just for a couple of minutes. Billy is quick to reach you, and you're suddenly aware of the kids staring. “We have an audience, keep that in mind.” You tell him when he pulls you close, strong arms encircling your waist.

“Were you ever kissed underwater?”

“No.” Your smirk matches his as you take a deep breath and push yourself down.

The kiss is a mess. You have to focus on holding your breath through the process, what makes you laugh, throwing bubbles on Billy's face. You manage to reach the bottom, your back hitting the rocks as Billy floats on top of you. But eventually, the oxygen you were saving is over, so you push him away and swim back up, laughing when you reach the surface.

“What a chaos.” You burst out when he comes back up as well. “We suck at underwater kisses.”

“I think I swallowed some water,” Billy says, coughing a little.

It only makes you laugh harder, removing the hair glued to your face. Swimming closer to him, you wrap your arms around his neck.

“Hey! Mr. and Mrs. Hargrove! Let's get moving!” Lucas shouts, making you roll your eyes.

You burst into laugh again when Billy flings you over his back, carrying you back to land.

And the walking restarts, with Max and Lucas constantly arguing and Billy trying to make them stop. The good thing is that it distracts you. And the bad part is that it distracts you from searching around for any signs of a Demothing nest. Your eyes scan through the woods, among the trees, looking for–.

“Holy shit!” Lucas exclaims and then he jolts away, running, followed by Max. You and Billy exchange a look before rushing after them.

Before you can ask what was that, you see it. A huge hole on the solid ground. It would fit a car in it. The thing goes down, in a slope, and then it keeps going until it makes a turn left. It's clear it doesn't belong to any kind of wild animal. It's not natural. A low, guttural low snarl reaches your ears, and you involuntary gives step back.

“Call them. Them then we found it.” Lucas says, taking a pencil and making a mark on the map.

The moment Max takes the small radio, you hear static. “Everyone listen up.” Steve says, more voices talking behind him. “We found it. A freaking hole in the ground. It has to be–”

“That's it.” Eleven's voice cuts him off. “We found it too.”

It was supposed to be just one.

“What?” Steve asks.

“Head back now. Everyone.” Hopper says and Max turns the radio off.

This is far worse than you thought.

×

@chloe-skywalker @dpaccione @dreamin-of-dacre @funeral-7 @uncookspaget @youhavemyfantasticbeasts @halloweenbitch2764 @redlovett @multific @shinydixon @nikkixostan @clockworkballerina @nope-thanks

[bentnotbroken1fanfiction]

Steve goes to jail AU

Previous

Jim Hopper has been a cop for fifteen years, and between Hawkins and Chicago he's seen it all. He's dealt with all kinds of situations and all kinds of people, so he likes to think he has a good read on most. But sometimes, even he is blindsided. 

When Max had called him last night and told him that Steve Harrington was about to shoot her step father, he'd wanted to laugh. He didn't of course, because she sounded panicked, but it just sounded so far fetched. Harrington was probably the last person he'd picture trying to kill someone. Then she'd told him Steve was the one that told her to call him.

That's when he knew it was real. He wasn't planning on running. He wanted to be caught. 

Jim sighs and leans back against his chair. He still can't really wrap his mind around it, but he had seen it with his own eyes. Shit, he'd had to talk the kid down.

Something has been nagging at him since he slapped the cuffs on his wrists, though. During the whole encounter he'd been…different. It was like he was someone else. 

Jim wants some goddamn answers.

And he's going to get them.

Harrington is leaning against the back wall, all loose limbs and humming a tune, when Jim gets to the holding cells. When he sees him, he gives a small wave. "Mornin, Chief," He greets, and then probably sees the circles under his eyes because he adds, "Sorry about the all nighter."

And he's not even being a smart ass. He really means it.

Jim frowns.

This is the kid he's used to. 

"I got some questions for you, Harrington. Nothing on the record, I just...as someone who cares about you, I want to understand." 

"Sure." He shrugs, "You can ask me whatever."

Now that he's here looking at him, he momentarily scrambles to figure out what to ask first.

He settles with, "Were you on drugs last night?"

There's an amused snort. "No, I wasn't high on anything."

Shit, he was really banking on that. It would wrap everything up in a nice little package with a bow. But nothing in Hawkins can be that easy, can it?

"Then can you tell me who the hell it was that I arrested last night?" He asks, and Steve snaps straight up. "Because it sure as shit wasn't the same kid that drives my kid around and helps the rest of them with those weird Dungeon games." 

Steve tries to sound casual, but it comes out more apprehensive. "Sorry to break your heart, Hopper, but that was all me."

"Bullshit."

He rubs his head and groans. "Ok, ok. Look, you want the truth?"

"I think it's safe to say that I do."

"It's hard to expIain…" He starts, "sometimes I just…go cold or something. It's like the opposite of me losing my shit. I'm just calm. And all the problems, all the issues I agonize over are suddenly easier to solve. It feels like I'm finally seeing clearly." 

Well, that's an awful extreme case of compartmentalization. "Does that happen often?" None of the kids have ever mentioned him acting strange.

"No, that's the thing. It's only happened like a couple of times." He stands up and walks towards the front of the cell. "And all of those times I was angry. Like not a normal angry, but something stronger. Rage maybe? It probably doesn't make sense, but that's the only way I can describe it."

"So what made you go into a rage last night?"

Steve stiffens and clenches his jaw. "I- I shouldn't…"

"You protecting someone?"

"Yeah. Well, I'm fucking trying to."

"Who?" He thinks he knows but he wants confirmation.

"Billy." He replies finally, "and he said he wanted me to tell you...but..."

"What did he want you to tell me?"

Steve keeps his eyes locked with Jim's and it's almost unnerving as he point blank states, "That his dad beats the shit out of him."

Jim had kind of seen that coming. He'd noticed the bruises, of course he had, but he had no proof and doubted the kid would tell him the truth if he asked.

"So, he tells you this and you get so pissed off you try to kill the guy?" Which he could probably see if the roles had been reversed, because Hargrove is a total hot head, but Steve isn't the type to fly off the handle. 

Suddenly the boy starts trembling, and at first he thinks it's because he's getting upset, but that's not it. He's angry and trying not to be.

"No." He starts pacing back and forth in front of Jim. "I already fucking knew that. I tried to get him to tell you hundreds of times."

Jim's eyebrows pinch together. "Then what-"

"Listen. It's not- I don't…" He stops moving and bites down hard on his lip. "Let's just leave it at Neil is a fucking monster, ok?" 

Steve resumes his pacing and Jim doesn't really like where this conversation seems to be going. He feels uneasy, but..."It may help the case if you tell me."

He looks like he'd rather chew on glass.

"Why don't you just walk me through what happened before you ended up in the Hargrove's living room." 

The kid is quiet for a few moments and then finally relents.

Part II

Series Masterlist

[bentnotbroken1fanfiction]

Part VI

Billy doesn't understand why Max cares. He'd been a dick to her pretty much the whole time they'd known each other, and he's not stupid enough to believe his end of life apology absolved him of anything. It didn't make things right between them, and it shouldn't. She shouldn't forgive him. 

But for some reason, that's totally beyond him, she's the one that showed up for him when he was released. She's the one that keeps showing up. That refuses to leave him alone. 

He didn't ask her to, didn't really want her to, but he also didn't have the energy to stop her. If she wanted to harass him into eating, if she wanted to physically pull him out of bed when he hadn't left it in awhile and then talk his ear off while doing dishes, that's her prerogative. 

But he thinks she does it because she's worried. 

It's no secret that his dad hates him. He may hate him even more now. Which is fine with Billy, because if no one else is going to punish him for what he's done, at least he can count on Neil to do it. Even if he has no clue what he's punishing him for, he still gets the job done. 

There's just one problem. Max is getting herself involved now. After the hits and yelling stop, she comes into his room uninvited with first aid kits and a whole lot of attitude. Sometimes she doesn't even wait for his dad to leave. She just…pushes past him and helps Billy up. 

He tells her to stop doing that. To stop helping him, because she's going to put herself in the line of fire and he doesn't want that. She should leave. She should get up and walk out and never come back. But she doesn't. She just tells him to shut the fuck up, Billy. I'm not leaving.  

And that's that. 

He has no energy to fight her. 

Maybe he doesn't want to anymore. 

He doesn't deserve her kindness. He doesn't deserve her loyalty. He doesn't deserve her period. But sometimes it feels good knowing he has her, for whatever fucking reason. When she's fussing over him, he doesn't feel so incredibly alone. 

And yeah, he knows that he should be alone, that he still needs to pay his dues, and it would be better for everyone if he stayed in his room and withered away, but she obviously doesn't agree. 

She won't let him hide anymore and she's been making him leave the house. 

Which he thought was annoying at first, but now he automatically puts on his coat when she tells him they're leaving, because leaving usually means seeing Harrington. 

And shit. He thinks she knows he has a thing for him. Ever since their first outing to the video store, she has been giving him sly smiles and throwing out random information about Steve and what he is doing. 

He's told her he doesn't fucking care what Harrington is doing, because he doesn't think he can handle hearing her spitting out the same nasty names that his dad does. But...she doesn't seem to mind. It doesn't bother her. She just rolls her eyes like sure you don't, and then drags him to the video store anyway. 

It's like he's an open fucking book to her now, and maybe he is. Maybe it's easier because all his defenses have been washed away. Maybe anyone could crack him open and read his blood splattered pages. 

She's just the only one that wants to. 

Maybe that's the real reason he doesn't fight her when she tries to mother him. It's not because he doesn't care anymore, it's because he does. It's because she gives a shit about him, even though she really really shouldn't.

Max actually gives a shit. 

And it's been a long time since anyone else has. 

Series now on AO3

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