#surely simpson is out there somewhere talking about the weather

[polarpics]

here is a compilation of Terra Nova voices i put together! featuring Teddy, Ponting, Deb, Clissold, Silas, Griff, Priestley which i think are all the ones that exist...? if there is one i am missing please tell me so i can track it down :)

[pregnant-piggy]

More than this

Harry Potter x reader

Part two of Walking in the wind

Words: 4100

Warnings: mentions of alcohol

after the song: More than this by One Direction

A/N: i spent the whole day crying to 1D videos yesterday. Maybe i should’ve posted this on the 23rd, but honestly I kinda forgot this one... Also if you want to rant about 1D to me, please do because i could talk about them the whole day

-------------------------------------

You were finally settled in your new apartment. It was not big, but it was your own. You had decorated it after your own taste. It was all yours. No one to share it with.

It had been a month since Harry had broken up with you and you were doing better. You had your life back on track, or so you heard Hermione say to Ron a week ago.

‘Yeah, she is doing better,’ Hermione said. ‘She is looking for her own apartment.’

‘That's nice,’ Ron said, taking a sip of his beer.

You were on the other side of the bar, hidden behind a group of girls, who were giggling loudly. You were out with a group of friends. They were dancing on the other side of the space. Ron and Hermione had separated from the group and walked to the bar. You could not help but follow; you thought they would be talking about you and Harry.

And you hadn't been wrong. The moment you had hid behind the loud girls you heard your name fall from Ron's lips.

Now you were anxiously waiting to hear Harry's name. You hadn't talked to him since that day in the rain. That day that was still freshly painted in your memories, like it was just yesterday.

Ron opened his mouth, but before you could hear what he was saying someone bumped into you, spilling their drink at your feet. You jumped away in shock almost losing your own drink and looked at the person responsible for the wasted alcohol.

It was a handsome man about your own age. He had dark hair and bright eyes, blue as a summer sky. On his lips played an apologetic smile and you had already forgiven him before he had even said anything.

‘I'm sorry! I wasn't looking at where I was going, my friend was still talking to me and though it wasn't about anything important I listened to it and then I was distracted and bumped into you and now the whole floor is wet...’

The man spoke fast and he stumbled over his words. You chuckled softly and smiled at him.

‘It's alright,’ you said, interrupting his talk.

‘I was rambling, wasn't I?’ the pretty stranger asked, looking a bit awkward.

‘You were,’ you said with a smile.

There was something about this man that felt familiar and comfortable. You tried not to be distracted by his gorgeous eyes, but it was difficult.

‘I'm Matt,’ he said and gave you his hand. ‘I'm not drunk, just clumsy,’ he added and you smiled.

‘Hi Matt, I'm y/n. I might be a little drunk.’

You were searching for your coat, but you could not find it anywhere. Running around your apartment you looked at every possible place it could  be, but it wasn't there. You were running late and you hated the feeling. It wasn't you to be late. You were always on time. Always.

Would it be at the first date after the break-up that you were not?

You gave up on searching for the coat and grabbed your keys. The door slam shut behind you and you flinched at the loud sound. In a hurry you ran down the stairs, almost tripping over your own feet.

- -- -

Harry was walking down the street while nodding along to the music on his head phones. He was feeling good today. The nice weather only added to his mood. He even wanted to say hello to the people he came across in the street.

The beat of the music changed and Harry moved his steps along. His feet aligned perfectly with the heavy bass of the song.

Something about the scene reminded Harry of you. Maybe it was the song, maybe the sun or maybe just the happy mood. But as Harry was walking in the city to his home, he thought of you.

Ever since that day in the rain Harry had not tried to find contact with you again. You had made it very clear that you didn't want to be friends with him anymore. Harry had never known that you had still loved him so much. He thought that it had been obvious you weren't working together.

But if you did not want to see Harry then that was fine. He was fine without you. Breaking up had been a good thing.

That was the thought in Harry's head the second before he saw you.

You were sitting on a terrace on the corner of the street, laughing at the person in front of you. Harry's feet stopped. He examined the person; it was a man and by the way you were laughing Harry realised it was a date.

You were on a date. A date with someone else.

Harry's heartbeat plummeted in his chest. What was this sickening feeling he felt in his stomach? What was that aching sting in his chest?

It was not because he was jealous of you. It could not be. Harry broke up with you. You were not together anymore and you had every right to date someone else. But then why did it hurt so much to watch?

Harry knew that eventually you and him would date other people, but he never thought that it would be this fast. You had only broken up a month ago. It was a month since Harry had seen you in the rain and you told him that you had never stopped loving him.

Quickly, Harry turned on his heels and walked away. The happy, joyous mood that he had had just mere minutes ago, was gone completely. Instead of the blue sky with the happy sun, there were now grey clouds and heavy thunder. The music got a different feel to it when Harry turned it up, as if to blur out his emotions.

‘You can't really like this music!’ you cried out as you sat down next to Harry on the couch.

He had been blasting his music through the stereo on highest volume. The bass bounced through the air and made the photo frames shake on their shelves.

‘Why not?’ Harry asked and he turned down the volume to talk to you.

‘Because it's so loud!’ you said. ‘It's not good for your ears, you know?’

You lifted your finger to Harry's ear and pressed it lightly. Harry laughed and changed to music to a more soft song. He got up from the couch and pulled you in his arms. You wrapped your arms around Harry's neck as his hands found their way to your waist.

‘I like this better,’ you said and rested your head on Harry's chest.

You both stayed silent as you swayed on the music. Harry's strong arms were folded around you waist and you listened to his heartbeat, that was synchronised to the music. He pressed a light kiss on the top of your head and rested his chin on the same spot.

Even long after the music was done playing, you stayed in each other's arms. Too comfortable to notice the silence around you.

- -- -

‘I had a really great time,’ Matt said at your front door.

One hand was already on the door handle ready to open your door and leave Matt outside. You had forgotten how to date; you and Harry had been friends before you started dating so there had never been those awkward first dates.

Harry knocked on your door and as you opened it you were faced with a big bouquet of flowers in every colour of the rainbow. The mob of black hair was somewhere behind it.

He cleared his throat and lowered the bouquet to reveal a bit of his face. ‘Ron said I should bring flowers and this were the only ones left,’ Harry said.

‘Are you sure you didn't rob the florist?’ you joked and took the flowers from him.

‘Ha ha, very funny. Are you ready?’

Were these those nerves everyone kept talking about? You felt nothing. Yes, the slight butterflies you always had around Harry, but you were comfortable with him and you knew there was nothing to be nervous for.

Harry draped an arm over you as you walked to the restaurant. The butterflies increased, but there were still no nerves.

‘Are you nervous?’ you asked Harry.

‘No,’ he answered and looked at you. ‘I'm excited. Why, are you nervous?’

‘I'm not. But everyone always talks about “the awkward first date" and the nerves. Is it normal that we don't have them?’

‘Maybe you're not nervous if you are with the right person.’

Someone waved their hand in front of your face and the memory faded.

Right, you were not alone yet. Matt was still there.

‘I'm sorry, I didn't sleep much last night. The Simpsons-marathon got the best of me,’ you said and Matt did not smile.

Your smile faltered as you were reminded that this was not Harry. Matt, according by the look on his face, did not like the Simpsons. You and Harry did; it was your go-to show when you couldn't sleep.

‘Alright, maybe I should catch up on some sleep,’ you said as an excuse to leave him alone. ‘I had fun, Matt. We should do it again!’

With that and a fake smile you stepped into your apartment, leaving your date alone outside.

- -- -

As soon as Harry got home he fell on his couch. He stayed there, face on the leather and hands along his body. He wasn’t jealous. He was not. It was just that seeing you with someone else was not something he was prepared for. He never imagined that you would get over him so fast.

Harry got up from the couch and stumbled to the kitchen. Without even looking around he headed straight for the liquor cabinet. He had to forget you. You were over him and he had to get over you, something he had apparently not done yet.

With every glass his sight got foggier and his head started to get heavy. But the memories of you stayed in his mind. They even seemed to get more.

You lied on the bed with your hair as a halo around you. Your arms were up in the air as if you tried to catch something. There was a sweet smile on your face and you giggled at nothing.

Harry stood in the doorway and was watching you. He had a grin on his face. You had way too much to drink at Hermione’s and Pansy’s party. But Harry loved you when you were drunk. You got all clingy and giggly and it was adorable to look at.

‘Can we get a sheep?’ you asked suddenly, with your hands still in the air.

Harry walked further into the room and he took your hands. You looked at him. Your lips were pink and there was a blush on your cheeks. Harry wanted to kiss you so bad right now.

‘Why do you want a sheep?’ he asked and he sat down next to you, pushing your arms down.

‘They’re so fluffy and sweet! And we can make out own sweaters!’ you exclaimed and turned to your side, so you were facing Harry’s knee. With your finger you started to trace figures on his legs.

‘We’ll talk about it in the morning,’ Harry chuckled and he brushed the air out of your face.

You turned your head to him and stared at him with big eyes.

‘What’s wrong?’ Harry asked and he brought his hand to his face.

‘You’re so pretty,’ you sighed and you took Harry’s hand. ‘I want to kiss you.’

‘Then do.’

You got up from lying down and sat on your knees. Right before your lips touched Harry’s you stopped and blinked. You placed your index finger on his lips and leaned back.

‘I have a boyfriend,’ you said resolute. ‘I can’t kiss you.’

Harry burst out in laughter and shook his head. ‘Babe, I am your boyfriend. You can kiss me.’

You raised your eyebrow at Harry and examined his face. Then, all of the sudden you placed your lips on his mouth, making Harry stop laughing and melting under your touch.

He hated you.

No, he hated how he still loved you. How you were still in his mind when he had thought that you weren’t.

He hated that every single thing around him reminded him of you. The bookcase that you had hit your head on and you then had to be taken to the ER. The couch that you used to sleep on when Harry was working late. The TV that you had bought for his birthday. The mugs in the kitchen cabinets that you had bought and that Harry had thought were so ugly.

Every single thing in the apartment had shared history.

Harry had to get out. He wanted to get out of this place.

He downed his last glass and walked out of the apartment, already knowing where he was going to.

- -- -

‘I brought coffee,’ you said and held up two carton cups.

Harry smiled thankfully at you and took one cup. The coffee warmed up his fingers that had turned cold from the wind. He had been waiting for you for twenty minutes and he had been afraid you were not going to show up.

‘What do you want to talk to me about?’ you asked as you sat down next to Harry.

Harry cleared his throat and stared at his feet, that were playing with the snow under them. He had been wanting to ask you this for a while, but he had never had the courage. So when Ron and Hermione had made it clear to him that the feeling was mutual, Harry had stepped up and asked you to meet him.

‘I want to ask you something,’ Harry said and he looked up to you.

‘And you could not do this over the phone?’ you remarked with a slight chuckle. Harry stayed silent and you took his hand to encourage him to speak. ‘What’s the matter?’

‘Wouldyougooutwithme?’ Harry spoke fast and incomprehensible.

‘Slower please.’

‘Would you go out with me?’ Harry asked after a deep breath.

‘Like a date?’

‘Yes, I mean if you want that. You don’t have to! I was just wondering and I-’

Harry was cut off by your lips on his. He shocked but after a second he kissed you back. His cold hands found their way to your cheeks and he cupped your face.

Your hot breaths formed little clouds in the air as you broke apart. Harry had a stupid grin on his face and you were smiling at him.

‘I would love to go out with you, Harry.’

- -- -

The TV was on, but you weren’t watching. Your phone was in your hand but you were not paying attention. You were thinking of Matt.

His face was flying around in your head, but it was unclear. His features were blurred and his eyes far away. You had had fun with Matt, you really had, but there was something missing. There was someone missing.

You scolded yourself for thinking such a thing. You reminded yourself of what had happened.

Your eyes shifted to the TV-screen and you watched the bright colours of the commercials. Laundry detergent, car, yoghurt, another car, clothes, insurance company, toothpaste, another car.

You did not even register the information thrown at you. For you it were all just colours. You sunk further into the couch and rested your head on the backrest, your eyes staring at the ceiling.

A knock on your door woke your from your trance. It was midnight, who could that be?

In your sweater and pyjama shorts, on your woollen sock you stumbled to your door, expecting a neighbour who must be at the wrong door. So when you opened the door and you saw Harry you were surprised. What was he doing here?

Harry was staring at his feet and he said nothing. The penetrating scent of alcohol reached your nose. The scene reminded you of your past history with him.

He was definitely drunk. He swayed on his feet as he stood in the middle of your living room. He looked around and his eyes rested on the picture of you and him you had standing in your bookcase.

You were standing in front of him, watching him put his hands in his pockets, not saying a single word. You waited for him to start speaking, but he kept his mouth shut. Minutes passed by and nothing happened. Harry looked at you, but he didn’t look you in the eye.

‘Honey, what’s wrong?’ you finally asked, done waiting. ‘I thought you were out with the guys?’

Your words seemed to pull Harry from his trance. He finally looked you in the eye and he formed a little smile on his lips.

‘I was, but something got in the way.’

‘Is everything alright?’ you asked worried, not knowing why Harry was looking at you with a smile.

‘Yes, everything’s more than alright.’ Harry kept standing with his hands in his pockets and that smug smile on his face. You grew annoyed. You knew Harry wasn’t that drunk; he had not started calling you princess or doll, something he only did when he was drunk. But he wasn’t completely sober either. His cheeks were slight red and he was not standing very stable.

‘Harry, what is going on?’ you asked irritated. ‘Why are you here?’

‘I love you.’

It was the first time he had said those words. He was the first of you to say it. You knew you loved Harry, but you were afraid what would happen if you would say it and he did not think the same.

But now Harry had said the words. He was staring at you with the same smile, but you saw the worry growing on his face as you took your time to answer.

‘I love you too,’ you said after a silence and Harry sighed relieved.

‘I know we haven’t been together very long yet, but I have known you for so long and I know that I love you and that-’

You broke him off by kissing him. ‘I told you I loved you, why are you making excuses?’ you remarked with a grin on your face.

‘I’m a bit drunk. Say it again.’

This was the same scene, yet a different sphere.

‘I saw you today, with that guy,’ Harry started, head turned to face the floor. ‘You shouldn’t be with him. It’s not right. You should be with me. I know I broke up with you, but I never should’ve. I never stopped loving you. The idea of you in his arms kills me. I can’t think of him lying down next to you at night. I can’t love you more than this, doll.’

You stared at Harry. One part of you wanted to shut the door in his face, the other part wanted to hold him in your arms. But you did neither of those things. You stepped aside and let Harry in.

He stood still in the living room and you were reminded so much of that night he told you he loved you. Which he just did, in a completely different way.

‘Harry, what do you mean?’ you asked, your fingers playing with the blanket on the backrest of the couch.

‘Take me back,’ Harry said. ‘Let me hold you in my arms and stay there. Let me be there when you fall asleep at night. Let me be there when you realise that we are perfect together.’

Your fingers stopped playing with the blanket and you took a step closer to him. You looked at his face and saw the tears in his green eyes. But his breath reminded you of his state. The moment he had called you doll, you had realised that he was drunk. You should’ve known it the moment he had stepped to your door, but some selfish part of you thought that he was really there because he loved you.

‘Harry, you’re drunk,’ you said and grabbed his arm. ‘You said it yourself, we weren’t working. We are better apart.’

Your own words broke your heart. You still loved Harry, you had never stopped loving him, not even when he broke your heart, not when he hurt you again on that day in the rain.

And of course you wanted to be with him, but you didn’t want to hear those words when he was drunk. You could not be with someone who only realised he loved you when you weren’t his anymore.

‘No, we’re not,’ Harry rasped. ‘You shouldn’t be with him, princess. He is not right for you. When he opens his arms and holds you close at night, it just won’t feel right. Because you belong with me. I can’t love you more than this, doll.’

Your heart stung at the words. They were sweet but they broke you. They were everything you, deep down, wanted to hear, but they hurt you now.

‘No, Harry. You told me we were not working anymore. You are the one who said we could “stay friends”. You are the one that broke my heart because you did not want to work on the relationship. We are done, Harry.’

Tears were running down your cheeks, but you looked at Harry. You saw that your words had reached him, despite his drunk state. He stared at you in disbelief and then collapsed on the couch.

‘Harry!’ you cried out and dropped on your knees next to him. He had his eyes closed and his breathing was telling you he had fallen asleep. With the tears still coming down, you draped the blanket over Harry, turned off the TV and walked to your bedroom.

- -- -

Harry was woken by the sunlight that was coming through the blinds. He felt an unfamiliar couch underneath his body and when he looked up he did not recognise the space he was in. What had happened last night? All he remembered was that he had seen you with a guy and that he had gone home and drowned himself in alcohol.

But the rest of the night was black and when he tried to think of how he got wherever he was right now, all he felt was an aching sting in his chest.

Harry sat up straight and looked around the room he was in better. He had never been here, he knew that for sure. Yet, there was something about this room that felt familiar and welcome. It reminded him of his own home, before you left. Could it be that…?

Harry’s thought were interrupted by a sound from the room behind the closed door. He opened the door softly and his heart skipped a beat when he saw who was in the bed.

You.

Had he, in his drunkenness, gone to your apartment? What had he done? Had he hurt you, had he done something embarrassing? Or worse, had he told you he still loved you?

Because when he was watching you right now, he realised that he did still love you. But he also felt that sting in his heart as he looked at you.

‘Harry,’ you said. You had sat up in your bed and were watching Harry with a look he could not place. Was it hurt?

‘I’m sorry for whatever I did last night. I was drunk. What I said was not true,’ Harry quickly said.

Your face fell and you turned your eyes to your hands. ‘Oh,’ you mumbled.

‘What did I say?’ Harry asked.

‘You told me you saw me with a guy and that you still loved me,’ you said with a sniff.

‘Oh,’ was all Harry could bring out.

Were you sad because Harry told you he loved you? Or were you sad because he denied it was true?

‘Do you still love me?’ you asked and you looked up to Harry.

There was a tear rolling down your cheek. Harry hurried over to you and sat in front of you. His hands took yours and he tried so hard to look you in the eyes, but he just couldn’t.

‘I do.’

His voice was low and his words were more whispered than said. But you heard them. Your hands began to tremble in Harry’s and that was when he looked up to you.

‘I do, too,’ you whispered back.

‘I’m sorry for everything I have said. I should not have broken up with you. I was afraid to fight, I was afraid to work on it. But now, I want to work on it. Because I can’t love you more than this.’

-------------------------------------

taglist

@kitkatkl @girllety @yuptha-tsme @sleep-i-ness @iamak20

let me know if you want to be added!

MASTERLIST

[rinnysega]

Out in the Rain - A Simpsons Fic

Hello all! I’m back into the swing of writing this week with my half of a fic trade with @spooky-simp! Thank you for your patience since this has been a crazy week, and I hope you enjoy this story of friendship between Ned and Bart.

Bart’s head was pounding with throbbing aches and pains. His throat was raw and scratchy, and now his clothes were soaking wet with the rain. His eyes and cheeks were still sore from the arguing and the crying from before, even though his world was very quiet now, and they were all just fuzzy memories. Just soft squeaks from the chains of the swing set were his company. That and the rain that pelted the sand into a sludge at his feet.

He slumped over to stare down at his shoes, holding his forehead in his palm as he tried to stop the spinning. The exterior forces of a growing storm were at war with the internal forces of an even bigger storm within him, and the collision made the boy feel trapped in solid stone.

Arguments were always an unfortunate byproduct of a life lived with his family. Bart felt by now he should have gotten used to them, but as he was nearing 15 years old, they only seemed to further agitate the growing boy and pit him against his own sense of self. His emotions were running a race his brain couldn’t run. What he felt was beyond his years of thinking, and while he didn’t know why he felt such sudden and aggressive emotions, it didn’t make them any less painful or mind-consuming. This must be the mess all teenagers go through, and why they really are the worst years of one’s life. The grunge songs of his youth were right.

The rain was coming down harder, and Bart slicked his hair back and sat up to stretch his back. The pain he felt from being hunched over for so long was numbing. The drops of water landed in harsh blows against his skin, and he tried to ignore their small stings while he looked around the dark and deserted playground. The streetlamps were barely an aid in seeing anything - not that expected to see anything.

But then, a bright light appeared somewhere behind him and reflected on the rain drops as they came down in harder sheets with the breeze coming in from the north. Bart turned on his swing, his hand over his brow to see the shadow of a man holding a flashlight, and he could hear the sound of the rain hitting tarp - an umbrella, of course.

Soft footsteps made their way to him and the water was blocked from hitting him further on the swing. His eyes caught the familiar face of his neighbor, and somewhere deep down inside him was a wave of peace.

“Flanders?” Bart asked.

“Hey, I thought that was you, Bart,” the man replied. “What in God’s good graces are you doing out here in this mess?”

“Well, what are you doing out here?”

“I went for a night walk, but I didn’t think the storm would catch up this quickly. Good thing I come prepared.” He motioned to the umbrella. “Now again, son, what are you doing out here?”

Bart wanted to walk away from him to avoid the discussion, but even he had to admit it was nice to be sheltered from the weather, even just a little bit. He instead bowed his head and held himself - in part to shield himself from naggy questions and another to keep himself warm. He was freezing.

“Homer and I had another fight.”

“Oh dear. Well, that’s no good.”

“Yeah, no duh.” Bart rolled his eyes and looked back at him.

“Well, Bart, I’m sure whatever the argument was about isn’t worth you being out in this weather. I’m sure your dad would appreciate it if you went home where you’d be safe. Then you two can talk things out in the morning.”

“Communication may work in your house, Flanders, but not in mine.”

“Then at least go home to protect yourself. Flu season is just around the corner, you know.”

Bart’s hands tightened around the chains of the swing. “I’m not going back there tonight.”

“Not even to your treehouse?”

“No.”

Ned stood there in thought for a moment. “Well, what about my house? It’s not on your property but at least your Mom can see you from the window, and she’ll know you’re okay.”

Bart was quiet.

“Bart?”

“Fine. I’ll do it for her.” He stood up from the swing and walked around to Ned who opened his arm to wrap across his shoulders. His sweater was a welcoming source of heat after being out there for so long. He may be a pissed off teenager, but he wasn’t stupid. Even he didn’t want to get sick because of his father.

They walked the few blocks back to Evergreen Terrace, and Bart only took one glance over at his home while Ned fiddled with his keys to unlock the front door.

“Just take your shoes and coat off at the door. You can get out of those wet clothes in the laundry room and I’ll bring you a fresh pair of Rod’s pajamas. What a blessing you boys grew up together and wear the same size, huh?”

“Uh huh…” Bart was half listening as he slipped off the soaking jacket and hung it up on the rack. The warmth of the house felt like a hug, and one he desperately needed at that.

“Guest room’s where it’s always been. Your toothbrush is still in the cabinet you used last time you were here.”

“How long ago was that?” Bart asked.

“About two months ago I believe.”

That felt like a punch. Before that he could count several more times he’d been a guest in Flanders’ house - just to get away from his own. Had he really been here that many times that he started keeping a toothbrush there?

“....Hey Flanders?”

“Yeah, son?”

Bart stepped over the pile of soaking clothes and gave the man a hug. His first one that he prompted on his own after all these years. One when the two of them were so close to being the same height after so long. Bart was growing up and close to adulthood, and he felt the gesture for his neighbor was long overdue.

“Thank you.”

Ned gave him a soft few pats on the shoulder, not really knowing what else to say aside from his usual, “Anytime, son.”  

For the first time in a long time, Bart surprised him by hugging him first. He was growing up.

[movienotesbyzawmer]

April 6: Rocky

I have learned that the six Rocky movies (so all of the Rocky ones but not the Creed movies) are available on HBO Max. I was looking for a new watch-and-take-notes-and-post-the-notes project, so yo. Check it.

I've seen all six of these movies. I saw most of this one in the theater, like, back then! I was terribly terribly young! Maybe 7. I remember my friend Greg really wanted to see it, but our parents wouldn't let us. So we had them drop us off to see Capricorn One, but Greg made us sneak in to watch Rocky instead. He was so excited about it he wanted to play-punch afterward, but it hurt and I didn't like play-punch. I also didn't care about the movie. You know what movie is decent, though? Capricorn One. Although the supporting performance from O.J. Simpson might throw ya.

Anyway, since its release the reputation of this movie has remained very strong. It won Best Picture in an extremely competitive year. It is very much the Rocky Balboa of that year's awards contenders! But I'm pretty sure I'm going to be watching this first movie and admiring its scrappiness, then watching the subsequent ones and rolling my eyes at their formulaic-ness.

The opening fanfare sets the atmosphere really awesomely actually.

Oh also I don't care at all for boxing. And yet it seems like the idea of it is good drama fodder, I mean the idea of a sport of just two people punching each other until one of them is the winner at that.

So the first scene is a boxing match in a little church somewhere. Some people are in attendance who apparently like to pass the time watching punching. Rocky is bloody and hangdog. After the fight, which Rocky won, both fighters convalesce next to each other in a back room, kind of indifferently. But we have learned that punch-sport is a part of Christian life.

Rocky walks home through the gritty streets, past his friends who sing rudimentary a capella music on a street corner. They should work on the complexity of their harmonies.

Rocky is home and his home is gritty also. Atmosphere. He has a tank with animals in it. I cannot tell what the animals are. He talks to them. Personality.

He has a mirror he looks at and the mirror is decorated with pictures of Young Sylvester Stallone. They are totally pictures of him as a boy and young man. But Sylvester Stallone was not in character as Rocky Balboa when he took those pictures. It is a little jarring.

At the pet store the next day we are introduced to Adrian. That is the spelling, I checked. She is very very very shy-acting. The director told her to act shy, and she was like OH I'M GOING TO MEET AND EXCEED THOSE EXPECTATIONS.

Rocky's next stop is The Docks. I am surprised that Philadelphia has a dock area with such large ships, but I guess that's real. But I'm also surprised that he's there on the business of being the muscle for a loan shark. I didn't remember about that side of Rocky's complex, complex personality.

That scene just ended with a very 80s-teen-movie moment; a fellow thug rolled down his window and bullyingly yelled, "so long, meatbag!" We feel so bad that Rocky doesn't have the respect of his coworkers in the loan shark gang.

After getting dressed down by his gangster colleagues, he then goes to his gym and there's this whole thing about how the coach guy is so sick of Rocky's boxing mediocrity that they gave someone else his locker. It seems like that wouldn't happen. On his way out, the other boxer taunts him by saying he's pumped to be in receipt of Rocky's locker which is a very fine locker. We saw it, though. It was just a locker.

Adrian again. Broad caricature of an introverted person. I don't buy it maybe. Then a scene in a bar and the conversation with the bartender is also dumb fakey acting.

He later came upon a bunch of jerks on a corner, but among them was an awkward teenage girl that he knows. He makes her leave with him and tries to give him avuncular advice, but that scene ends with her telling him, "screw you creepo!" The exposition of this movie has a very opaque strategy.

0:30:00 - A scene with Apollo Creed does some more very unnatural exposition, setting up the premise that some local underdog is going to get a chance to fight him. This doesn't seem like an acclaimed movie. This seems like a scene in a cheap romance movie where the Handsome Man confesses to his best friend that what he's really looking for in a woman is someone not so pretty.

AC is flipping through a straight-up book, looking for a good boxer to fight on January 1, 1976, to celebrate the bicentennial. I'm a little "wha?" about some of this. He chooses Rocky Balboa because of his catchy "Italian Stallion" nickname and remember because Columbus was Italian so

Rocky and Adrian go on a date. It's Thanksgiving but that happens anyway. It does not bristle with romantic energy. It reeks of social obligations. It seems like the beginning of the kind of loveless relationship your grandparents began in the 1940s in their dustbowl-decimated agrarian community.

They are back at his little shithole apartment and he is a persistent man and I do not root for this relationship.

Things escalated kind of quickly. Rocky got invited to an agent guy's fancy office and offered a chance to fight for the World Heavyweight Championship. The next scene, everyone knows about it and he's on TV. He seems like a dumb lug. How can he possibly succeed. Good job contrasting his character with the big celebrity, though.

Burges Meredith is oddly appealing as this surly, pirate-talking boxer-coach-manager guy. He comes to Rocky's apartment sucking up, and Rocky isn't receptive, I'm pretty much buying BM's different emotions, and Rocky's.

1:11:24 - Pretty sure my friend and I talked a lot about this scene when we saw it back then, he fills a glass with raw eggs and drinks it up. All one shot, baby.

This scene with Paulie, Adrian's brother who is Rocky's friend, I don't like. Paulie is a bad friend. That scene ends with Rocky beating up pig carcasses. They should have just had that part.

His hands are bloody when he punches the meat things. That's his blood, right? That's not like animal flesh?

We just had a very melodramatic scene with Rocky and Adrian and Pauly, and Pauly just went nuts. This time, at least, Rocky and Adrian react to him the way you'd think people normally would.

1:30:55 - Famous training montage. I think as this movie series progresses these montages get more stylish. As it is, it's going for just a rousing moment of "he seems confident as he trains", as the music pumps you up with the profound lyrics, "trying hard now" and "getting strong now".

They have actually explained almost nothing about the specifics of boxing. I realize that now as Rocky says "no one has ever gone the distance with Creed". Which I think means something about going all 15 rounds, right? But the point is that I haven't had to hear much about stuff like that, and I honestly don't mind that.

1:44:30 - Ew, some actually kind of bad stock footage of the crowd at the fight. Oh, but then a cameo by actual Joe Frazier, probably.

As the fight begins I gotta say I have been effectively made to root for this underdog hero. I've been indifferent to most of the movie so far, and I'm indifferent to boxing, but ferrealz I'm excited to watch this fight.

It's cinematic with lots of angles that you don't see when you're watching actual fights (I assume), but also the actual fight-acting by Stallone and Carl Weathers seems like they're getting it right. That can't be easy, right? I mean, it's punching! Faces!

1:54:11 - Oh shit I remember this ahhhhhh his eye his eye, his EYE is swollen shut and he tells them to cut it open! That, like, what? He's going to go back out and fight with his eyelid literally slashed open WHAT

They weren't even that careful doing that slice

I thought they would be relying more on the commentators as narrators to tell us what to feel, but it's really all the cinematic storytelling that is getting it done.

But the aftermath of the fight is like opera, everyone is passionate and yelling and it doesn't work on me as well as it must for most people. I don't even exactly get what the outcome of the fight is (partly because I don't understand boxing). But that's the point, at least a little bit; in the heat of passion he just wants to tell Adrian that he loves her. That works well for this movie. And the way it just ends in that swirl of excitement, no denouement, it's really effective.

So overall there are lots of things about this movie that I don't care for, but there are some things to appreciate. It's not a fancy movie, but it seems like they did a particularly good job with the final boxing match feeling like exciting movie drama while also seeming like authentic boxing. As if I know anything about authentic boxing.

I don't agree that it should have won Best Picture over Network, All the President's Men, and Taxi Driver.

One last observation: looking back, I'm pretty sure that scene with the teenage girl is a result of the observation that the movie greatly lacks females.

(next: Rocky II)

[incorrectvalkyrie]

Questions About My Original Character...

Kody “Kingdom” Ammirati 

What does your character’s name mean? Did you pick for the symbolism or did you like the way it sounded?

My character is named after a friend of mine who passed away a while back. The character’s nickname is a symbolism to how she sees rainbow six as her family. Growing up her father referred to his family as a “kingdom” and how he was willing to do anything to protect and support his family at any length. It was something that stuck with her

What is one of your character’s biggest insecurities? Are they able to hide it easily or can others easily exploit this weakness?

Kody’s only insecruitiy is that sometimes she thinks she’s not good enough and she’s pretty good at hiding it. Only Frost knows about it.

What would be their favorite physical trait about themselves?

Kody loves her eyes the most because it is one of the only things she has in common with her mother. Nice Blue eyes.

What are their favorite traits about their lover?

Kody loves Elena's mind and how it never stops coming up with ideas, always thinking. Also her voice, Kody melts everytime Elena starts talking (Especially when it's dirty)

Are they sexually confident or more of the shy type?

Kody is for sure a bit of both. To her her lover, she is confident while to someone she hardly knows, she can become a bit closed off and keep it to herself.

Do they have any hobbies that their lover finds unusual, odd, or otherwise annoying?

Kody loves to cook! Her mother and Nona taught her when she was young and she's really good at it! Elena finds it a tad bit annoying because the team forces her to cook all the time, taking away their down time.

Is there a catchphrase or sound that they tend to make a lot (likely without being aware of it)?

Kody tends to say “i suppose” or “perhaps” absentmindedly to things that are said to her, mira finds is cute

What is, perhaps, their biggest flaw? Are they aware of this or oblivious to it?

Kody’s love and her loyalty to her family and friends, she would do anything for them no question. 

Do they have a favorite season? What about a favorite holiday?

Kody love’s winter! She always loved the cold, the snow, and the hot coco after being out too long. Her favourite holiday is definitely Christmas, her entire family gets together and spends the week together. She can't wait to drag Elena with her. 

What is something that would make your character fly into a rage?

If anything were to ever happen to her family/friends she would lose it 

Is there some particular talent, skill, or attribute that they simply could not give up?

Kody would rather die than lose her cooking talent. It keeps her close to her Nona. 

What are your character’s sleeping habits? Heavy or light sleeper? Blanket stealer? One that always rolls onto the floor? Pushes their lover onto the floor? Sleep talker or walker?

Kody, when first falling asleep is a heavy sleeper but when closer to morning the lighter she comes. Kody tends to cuddle a pillow for some reason (she’s been doing so since a child) but recently, she tends to cuddle Elena more than a pillow.

Do they live alone or with family? How do they feel about their family/roommates?

Kody used to live alone before joining team rainbow and living on base but when she gets the chance she does stay over at her parents because why not?

Is your character the athletic type or more of a couch potato? What are some sports/games that they like?

Kody can be a bit of both. She loves playing ice hockey during the winter with her fellow JTF2 and spetsnaz, or playing some soccer with Capitao and the brits. Sometimes she finds herself sparing against Cav, hoping to improve her Jiu-Jitsu. Some days you’ll find her just being lazy on the couch watching the simpsons.

Does your character have dreams of getting married and/or having children?

Yes to both. Kody has always wanted to get married to the person she loves and have her own big family to share her traditions with

What kind of home would they want to live in? Where would they place this abode?

Kody has voiced that she’d enjoy just a simple home, if possible by her family. Elena has said she agrees but wouldn’t mind somewhere quiet and out of a city.

Would your character be the kind to get into fights? (physical or verbal) Would they be a good fighter or cave in rather easily?

Kody does have a tendency to get into fights, physical more than verbal. Growing up with five brothers she became good at fighting simply because brothers can be jerks 

Does your character like animals? What are some of their favorite animals? Would they want pets? 

Kody loves Dogs! She impulsively bought a dog and brought it home to hereford. Harry was not impressed and told her to get rid of it but the team complained and harry gave in and allowed the dog to stay. They named her Jellybean. 

What is one of your character’s biggest fears? How would they react when dealing with this fear?

Kody’s biggest fear is to die alone and i think to be in that situation she would probably go into a full blown panic 

What kind of tattoos, piercings, birthmarks, freckles, and other such unique physical features do they have?

Kody had her blood type, AB tattooed on her inner right wrist as soon as she joined the military. She’s not big on tattoos or piercings so she never bothered to get others. 

In their own words, how would your character describe what their lover is like?

“What’s Elena like? Elena is amazing! She’s so kind and patient! She is really like the mom of team rainbow, really stern and makes sure everyone is behaving. Huh? What's she like alone with me? Well, she’s quite dominate *laughing* She loves being in control, which is fine… she's kinda kinky y’know? But I love it, I love her!”

Is there something traumatic from your character’s past that greatly affects them even to this day?

When Kody was about six or seven, her and her mom were in a fire accident that almost killed them, kody often has nightmares about it but it doesn't affect her a whole lot but it does make her a bit more hesitant when she is around fire. 

What is their lover like sexually? How do they feel about their lover’s quirks, needs, etc?

Elena has quite a high sex drive that Kody enjoys a lot. Elena is into anything really and Kody is all for Elena’s needs, easily submitting to anything she wants.

What is one of the most courageous things your character has ever done for a loved one?

Nothing too big or serious but during a training simulation Kody jumped onto a paint grenade, taking the full damage, giving Elena the time to clutch the match.

If your character wanted to be alone, where would they go?

Kody would go somewhere pretty high up and quiet, so possibly the roof of hereford.

Does your character have favorite foods? (breakfast, lunch, dinner, dessert, snacks, etc)

Kinder Surprise chocolate! Kody loves that chocolate so much. When Elena notices something off she’ll go off base and buy her tons of kinder products to help her cheer up.

Is your character afraid of death? If they got to choose how to die, how would they want to go?

Kody isn’t afraid of death, she’s the kind to accept it with both arms open. If she had the option, she’d choose to be with her family and friends.

What kind of weather does your character like? Cloudy skies, rainy days, sunshine, etc?

Kody loves Thunder and lightning, no real reason but claims that it helps her sleep easier.

Does your character’s family affect your character in any way?

Kody finds that she has to prove herself to her father and brothers to find her fit in the family, but other than that her family is supportive and constantly keeping contact with her. They love her lots. 

Is there a particular event that would emotionally devastate your character?

If anything had happened to her family or Elena that she could have prevented. It would break her completely. 

Is your character the kind to hide their true emotions or do they wear their heart on their sleeve?

Kody wears her heart on her sleeve but she has a tendency to hide how she feels in certain situations 

 What is some random affectionate thing that your character always does to their lover?

Whenever Elena is in the lab working on new projects, Kody will always bring her a fresh cup of coffee and some snacks, then proceed to hug her from behind, kissing her neck softly. Elena adores it

Is your character outgoing? Would they be the leader of the friend group, or the quiet one that gets dragged along?

Kody is really outgoing and is easy to befriend everyone, though she can be quiet and be dragged out of her comfort zone to things with groups. She doesn’t mind though.

Is there anything in particular that would ignite your character’s jealousy? Or does your character not get envious?

Sometimes when Elena and Eliza are together, Kody can get a bit jealous but Monika assures her that there is no need because Elena is interested in no one but her. 

What is something that your character has nightmares about? Are these frequent? Do they heavily affect your character’s mood?

One of Kody’s constant nightmares, besides the fire when she was younger, is one of her overseas on her last tour where her unit was part of an ambush that took out all of her unit but herself and her friend. They don’t affect her mood much, but she does get quiet and keep to herself. Elena is quick to notice this and will force her into bed and spend the day together watching movies and cuddling. 

How does your character and her lover confess their love to each other? 

One day Kody is just sitting in the lab watching Elena work and she just blurts it out without thinking, making Elena stop and blush. 

It takes Elena a few weeks to say it after the training sim where Kody takes the paint frag. Elena rushes to her and pulls her into a heated kiss in front of everyone, telling Kody that she loves her afterwards.

When does their first hook up happen?

Their first hook up was as strangers when they met at a bar, neither of them counted it as their first time. Kody says it was when Elena dragged her into Meghan Castellano’s room and slammed her against the door and called her an over exicted puppy before Fudging her into a crazy mess. Elena merely comments “She had it coming, and i have no regrets.”

~~~~

If you have other questions you’d like feel free to hit that inbox cause i will answer them..... Hope you guys liked..

IncorectValk [:

[harryandmolly]

Change of Pace - 3 (Summer 2019)

cowritten by @achinglyshawn

summary: Shawn and Maya meet again 10 years after life got in the way of love

warnings: language

wc: 7.2k

-------------

Geoff drags him out Sunday night, reminds him that he promised to play guitar for karaoke at the SandTrap for at least an hour until their regular guy can get there. 

“Besides,” Geoff rasps as he pulls Shawn into local-filled pub on the beach, “you need to have some fucking fun, dude. Stop wallowing over Maya.” 

“I’m not wallowing,” he insists, but he sounds a little too defensive even to his own ears. He re-adjusts his grip on his guitar case, following Geoff towards the stage. “Just, you know, processing. It’s a lot to process, dude.” 

Geoff takes Shawn’s guitar and sets it down next to his bass on the stage. He gives Shawn a look, amused but sympathetic, then jerks his head towards the bar. “C’mon,” he says, clapping Shawn on the back, “Let’s grab a beer before they need us on stage.” 

Shawn doesn’t argue, just lets Geoff push him forward. He takes the first empty seat at the end of the bar and nods at Meghan, the new bartender who started a few weeks ago. She smiles and he thinks maybe she blushes. He wonders if she’d flirt with him, if he tried. Probably. It could be fun, if it sounded at all remotely like something he wanted to do. 

Instead, he orders two beers and listens to Geoff talk about the woman at work he’s trying impress until they’re summoned to the stage. 

Maya scans herself in the reflection of a too-shiny BMW in the SandTrap lot. She hasn’t seen herself in these shorts since she was in her mid 20s, probably. She found them in the bottom of a box as she unpacked from her storage unit that was shipped over from Manhattan. 

She tried them on as a joke initially. But… they looked great. Especially a couple wine glasses in.

She’s heading for the SandTrap tonight because it’s just… time. Truthfully, she hasn’t left the house really since her run-in with Shawn at the farmer’s market last weekend. She’s been in and out to surf but has otherwise gone full hermit. When she realized this morning by looking at a paper that it was Sunday, she felt a sting of shame. 

So the SandTrap. 

It’s a dive on the beach. Their food is terrible, their service isn’t great, but the music is consistently awesome and Avila is so tiny that the nightlife is limited at best.

Just a drink or two, just to feel like she’s been out. It’ll be fine. Sure, she opened a bottle of shiraz to give herself the courage to get out the door, but this is an adjustment period. She shouldn’t judge herself. And she’s been trying to get him off her mind all week. She needs this.

But the shorts may have been a choice too far. I mean yes, she looks hot. CorePower Yoga and regular pilates were her vices while she was working. She’s in excellent shape. But the little cutoffs with her platform sandals and the drapey tank top? She’s too old for this.

But it’s too late. So she chews on her lip, tasting chapstick and wine, and walks inside.

It’s not the busiest night, and Shawn prefers it that way. The crowd is mostly locals chatting, exchanging a laugh or catching up about their weeks. No one’s too drunk, so the singing on stage hasn’t been awful. Besides, he’s likes watching his friends make idiots of themselves, and he likes listening to the ones who actually manage to carry a tune. 

He’s reminded of what fun is, for a little while. 

He can’t help but laugh at one of the locals’ rendition of Never Gonna Give You Up, and Geoff catches his eye from across the stage, an approving smile spread across his lips. 

It’s not like Shawn needs anyone to take care of him, but it’s nice having Geoff around. He’s never had an older brother, but he thinks Geoff fills the role well. 

Cheri claims the last song of the hour before the band goes on break and Shawn passes guitar duty back to Beckett, the kid who regularly plays the gig. The barista picks Careless Whisper as her anthem, and Shawn loves her for it. 

He loves this song. This song makes him want to pick up the saxophone, but he’s not sure he has the lung capacity for it. Either way, he finds himself melting into the chords, into Cheri’s pretty voice that soothes him even with the saddest lyrics. 

He’s caught up enough not to notice the woman who broke his heart standing in the back of the bar.  

Oh, come the fuck on.

She’s able to actually chuckle to herself because of course he’s here. Of course he’s on stage in those tight black jeans bobbing his head as he looks around the dimly lit dive bar. His fingers move deftly against the neck of the guitar she’s known almost as long as she’s known him. She wonders if he remembers the nights he spent holding her between his legs, kissing her neck and shoulders while she tried to learn to play. She hasn’t thought about that in a long time. She got really good at not thinking about that.

Maybe she should take this as a sign and just leave. Maybe she’s done enough just by getting out of her yoga pants to come tonight. Maybe she can count this as a brisk walk by the beach… a little tipsy and in platforms. That’s fine, right?

But then he’s getting off the stage and settling into a stool by the bar and he clearly hasn’t seen her so maybe she’s safe? She recognizes the song the band plays next and it’s giving her a conflicting sign. She has to stay through the end of it, at least. The woman singing has a nice voice.

A woman he doesn’t recognize gets on stage after Cheri, and Shawn’s glad he’s not accompanying anymore, because he kind of hates the song she picks. It’s Ashlee Simpson, an artist he hasn’t heard since college, when Maya would blast her music in her car as they sped through Toronto in search of a hot club or some chicken nuggets. Whichever they’d run into first. 

The song makes his heart beat faster. Too much reminds him of Maya these days, including the woman herself. She’s somewhere in this town, breathing the same salty beach air he breathes, watching the same sun rises he watches. Buying the same Starbucks, listening to the same radio stations. 

He takes a sip of beer. Forces himself to stop thinking about it. About her. He used to be so good at not thinking about her at all. 

Ok, new plan. She’s going to sneak up to the bar behind him and get herself a drink then retreat to where she can stay out of sight. One or two cocktails and she’s out the door, no problem.

Problem: the floorboards are warped by decades of sea salt air and bad weather. She catches an edge and rolls her ankle, crashing into the man standing in front of her with a wince. She apologizes quietly but knows she’s made a scene.

He’s caught up in his effort to push her from his thoughts when he hears a bit of a commotion at the other end of the bar. A barstool screeches, a beer bottle topples onto its side. 

When he looks over, he’s not even surprised. She’s always popping up when he’s trying to forget her. 

Maya slumps into a stool in defeat, now very sure Shawn’s seen her. She can’t bear to look though. She needs a fuckin’ drink.

Maya’s face looks red as she slips around the man to settle at an empty barstool. Shawn feels his own face turn a similar shade of crimson. He doesn’t know what to do. He doesn’t know when she got here or if she’s seen him, but for a moment, he’s stuck. 

It’s like a video game, where you’ve got two choices, and one choice moves the story along while the other sends you down a dead end, or over the edge of a cliff. Shawn doesn’t know which decision is which. None of his options now feel right. Staying in his seat and ordering another beer feels like a dead end. Getting up and saying hi feels like flirting with the cliff. 

He decides dead ends are boring. 

He plucks his wallet from his pocket and tosses a couple bills on the bar before moving down to the other end. He approaches Maya from behind, makes sure she can’t spot him before he’s leaning his forearms on the bar next to her and getting Tom’s attention. He’s the kind of bartender that responds to familiar faces, so Shawn’s pretty sure Maya isn’t making much headway. 

The bartender is busy and Maya is impatient. She’s staring at him and leaning most of her weight into her elbows that are propped on the bar but he’s definitely ignoring her in favor of chatting with some patrons she assumes are regulars. She’s about to go full New York Woman and start clearing her throat loudly when she feels a wall of warmth settle in behind her.

She doesn’t have to look. She knows what he feels like even when he’s not touching her.

The hair on the back of her neck stands up under where the rest is clipped up at the back of her head. He’s not so close that she can feel his breath. It’s probably a blessing. 

“Shawn, buddy!” Tom exclaims when he makes it back to the end of the bar. “You looking for a whiskey sour?” 

“Hey man,” he says with a smile, “Yeah, please. Whiskey sour and a scotch, neat.” 

Tom nods, turns away, and Shawn finally risks a look down at Maya. 

“That’s still your drink, I hope,” he murmurs with a smile, forgoing any sort of formal greeting. 

She turns and lowers back into her stool. His curls are frizzy from the humid air. His eyes are warm and soft. She swallows.

“Yeah. I still drink like an old man,” she confesses, “I think working on Wall Street made it worse.”

She remembers what he tastes like when he drinks whiskey sours. Her mouth waters completely against her will. She squeezes her fingers into the lacquered bar top and drops her eyes to his chest.

She doesn’t even look surprised to see him, which makes him think that she showed up when he was still on stage. And that she knew he was gonna approach her. He hates how predictable he is, but he couldn’t stay away. He’s drawn to her, whether he wants to admit it or not. 

She makes him laugh. She always has. And her drinking like an old man joke is one of the oldest they share. His heart flips. He feels inexplicably comfortable and out of control, all at once. 

He laughs. Her skin sizzles with the sound. She licks her lips and lifts her eyes to face him.

“Wall Street, eh?” He didn’t know that. “So does that mean you’re rich? Are you the wolf?” 

He’s flirting with her. He can’t fucking help it. He’s never not flirted with her. It also gives him something to do besides stare at her, like he wants to. He wants to sit her down and take a proper look, find all the things that have changed in twelve years and commit them to memory, so that he can know her just as well as he used to. 

He keeps his gaze on her fingers, instead, watches her nails dig into the bar because it’s the safest place to look. Anywhere else, and he’ll be lost. 

Maybe he should’ve picked the dead end.

He’s laughing, he’s joking. She can see the hesitancy in his eyes -- it seems he really doesn’t know what the fuck he’s doing either. It’s strange. They used to say whatever came flying into their heads without thinking. 

She looks sheepish. “I never even saw that movie,” she confesses, “But I did meet a couple of the guys represented in it.”

She’s so lame.

“I do okay, though. Financially.”

A gross understatement. Maya has more money than she’ll ever know what to do with. Part of stepping away from the office was brought on by realizing in a sweeping wave of guilt how relatively little she’s given to charity in the last decade and change, too caught up in her own life. Another thing to work on.

She sounds like she does whenever she’s trying to be modest, like she totally is rich but it makes her uncomfortable to admit it. He feels stupid for asking the question in the first place. You’re not supposed to ask people about how much money they make, and here he is, hasn’t seen the woman in twelve years, and he’s asking if she’s fucking rich. What’s wrong with him?

She makes him crazy. He decides to blame her, even though it’s totally unfair. 

“I shouldn’t have asked,” he murmurs as he drops his gaze to the drinks that appear on the bar in front of them. His fingers curl around his whiskey and he swirls the glass in smooth circles. 

Maya wants to scramble all over the place to make him feel comfortable -- it’s an instinct. Her working environment has largely dulled it over the years. She couldn’t get anywhere in New York finance if she was always tripping over herself to make the men around her comfortable. But Shawn brings it out of her easily like it was just at the surface.

“It’s okay,” she laughs, and it feels as light as her head does, “You’re not exactly a stranger, Shawn.”

Not exactly a stranger. Understatement of the year. He feels like he knows her better than he knows himself. But he thinks of all the things he doesn’t know anymore, and the feeling goes. He’s not exactly a stranger, no, but he might as well be. 

“What are you doing for work these days?”

He’s watching the ice spin in a vortex, when her question breaks him from his trance. He smiles to himself, then gives her a sideways look. 

“I’m, ah, I refurbish and make guitars. And basses and other strings too. And I just started working on my first piano, actually.” 

He feels sick, telling her what he does like she’s an acquaintance from the street. He hates that she doesn’t already know. He hates that there’s any time in between them at all, when looking at her makes him feel like he was hers just yesterday. 

He remembers the last time he kissed her so clearly. It doesn’t feel like it was years ago. It feels like minutes. Seconds, even. He’s dying to kiss her again, but he knows he can’t. He shouldn’t. 

He sips his drink instead. 

Maya’s nose twitches as she tamps down a goofy smile. Of course he’d find a way to get even closer to the music. She used to joke that if he could climb inside a guitar and live in there, he would. It seems he found a way.

She watches his adams apple bob as he swallows. She finds herself swallowing around nothing and turns the glass between her hands.

“Of course you are,” she murmurs. It’s a little gentler and warmer than she intends it to sound. It feels like a brush of a hand against someone you’ve loved since you were a kid.

“That’s… that’s amazing, Shawn.” She finds she keeps saying his name. She hasn’t said it in so long. It feels nice.

The way Maya says his name makes his head spin. He tries to find solace in his whiskey. He takes a sip, then another, attempting to ignore how his skin buzzes pleasantly at the sound of her voice. 

She uses his name and ‘amazing’ in the same sentence and he feels like a freshman in university again, eager and hopeful and dying to be as impressive to her and she is to him. He’s always preened in the light of any compliment she’s been gracious enough to give him. Seems like that’s still the case, all these years later. 

He finishes his drink and slides it away from him, the alcohol pulling him down onto the barstool next to hers so he can order another. 

“I’m not the wolf of Wall Street, but it suits me,” he says as he turns on the stool to face her, one forearm pressed along the edge of the bar so his fist is curled near her elbow. If he wanted, he could stretch his fingers and touch her, feel her skin beneath his fingertips once more. 

He doesn’t. He doesn’t do a lot of things his body tells him to, lately. 

As Shawn drinks, Maya drinks. She slings back gulp after gulp of scotch until her glass is empty. She shouldn’t have another, probably. She never drinks this much anymore. She doesn’t know what she’d be like drunk now, especially around him. There’s no telling what she’ll do or say.

Fuck it. She orders another scotch.

She admires his hulking frame as he sits beside her. He continued to fill out and bulk up a bit in their time apart. Every curve of muscle suits him beautifully. She thinks about what it would be like to draw him again like she used to. The thought has her back in her fresh glass of booze.

They’re quiet for a moment, both sipping drinks like they’re thankful for something to do with their hands.

And then—

“I could show you around the shop, some time. If you wanted.” 

He says it without thinking, without considering what having her in his personal space might do to his heart. But he can’t stop being reckless now that he’s confronted her and they’re actually talking again and she’s not walking away from him like he used to think she might. Now that she’s looking at him almost like she used to.

He wants to close himself off to her, but he’s like a hungry flower in the sunlight. He blossoms and blooms and basks in her warmth because it’s the only way he’s ever known to be around her. 

She perks up when he offers to show her the shop. He wants to see her again. He’s not just being his unfailingly polite self. He wants to be around her, he wants to show her something that’s important to him. It makes her breath catch in her chest. She’s nodding before he even finishes his sentence.

“Yeah. Definitely. Yes. I want to see your shop.”

It’s not subtle, but it’s very honest. She blinks up at him with a big grin.

She doesn’t hesitate. He feels his cheeks flush. She wants to see his shop. His life. He has a feeling she knows how important work like this is to him. It makes him all that more nervous to show her, but no less eager. 

It feels too good to be true and for a moment, he waits for this to be another dream. He’d ask to buy her another drink, reach to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, and she’d nod, part her lips to speak, then nothing. He’d be awake. 

He takes a sip of his drink to make sure everything is real, though he’d much prefer to pinch himself. He swallows and smiles at her, setting his glass down on the bar. He can’t stop smiling, and each smile is easier than the last, especially with the whiskey. 

“Don’t get too excited,” he laughs gently, “It’s not, you know, Gibson, or anything.” 

He’s giggling and smiling and drinking and Maya’s halfway to lifting herself into his lap, so she should probably put her glass down and let the world right itself. But she might be as drunk on him as she is on the booze.

“Fuck Gibson. I bet you’re better,” she says easily. It’s very honest. Her tongue is loose. At least she’s still keeping her hands to herself. For now.

If she’s been working on Wall Street, she probably knows all sorts of impressive business moguls and financiers. He doesn’t think he’s much compared to the people she’s got waiting back at home for her. He doesn’t know who it is she’s got in New York, a boyfriend or what, but he’s just a beach bum with a bunch of guitars. He won’t pretend to even compare, no matter how badly his gut tells him to peacock for her. It’s not who he is anymore. 

“We could go now, if you want,” he hears himself saying, to his honest fucking horror. He must be drunk. He’s only halfway through the second whiskey, though, so it’s not the alcohol that’s so intoxicating. 

He finishes his drink, then wets his lips and quirks a brow at her. Fuck it. 

At his suggestion, her glazed eyes brighten. “Yes! Let’s go now!”

She’s definitely loaded. There’s no getting around that now. But she thinks maybe some fresh air might help.

Who the hell is she kidding? She just wants to be alone with him where she can hear herself think over the bad karaoke. Not that she’s really thinking at all now. This all feels too good to think about it. 

She stands and bites her lip at him.

She’s tipsy. He knows the signs. The laugh in her voice, the flush in her cheeks, the glossy gleam in her eye. His heart warms. He missed this. He missed her. 

It doesn’t scare him the way it did only an hour ago. He guesses he can thank alcohol for that. 

She stands before him and he checks her out, openly, blatantly. He hasn’t let himself before now, but the alcohol has control of some of his baser judgements at the moment.

Or maybe that’s just a convenient excuse. 

Either way, she looks good. Just as gorgeous as she was in college. More so, actually. Elegant, even buzzed on scotch, in a way she wasn’t in her early twenties. She’s a woman now, when they were both just kids before. 

She feels his eyes all over her and tries not to squeeze her thighs together desperately, but finds it a challenge to keep them apart. Her mind wanders absently to which box her Hitachi magic wand might still be packed in. She… will probably need it tonight.

Finally, he sucks in a breath and drags his gaze from her beautifully round thighs to her face. He grins, unfolds himself from under the bar and stands to face her. As he drops a $50 on the bar, Shawn holds his hand out and gestures towards the door. 

He lifts himself to stand and puts a bill down on the bar, which is good because she forgot all about that. She flushes pink and smiles at him as a thank you. She follows his hand, turning toward the door.

“After you, Lulu.” 

She stops short at the nickname. No one’s called her that since he did 12 years ago. She doesn’t have the presence of mind to play it off. She blinks and spends a moment reveling in it.

“Oh,” she breathes, looking over her shoulder at him, “That’s an old one.”

He’s just as caught off guard as she is. The name slipped out before he could stop it, but the way she’s looking at him makes him glad he didn’t. 

He tries to play it cool. 

“Oldie but goodie,” he says with a quirk of his lips and a gentle shrug. 

Maybe he doesn’t take the nickname as seriously as she does. Maybe that won’t keep him up at night the way it will her. Maybe he assumes other people have picked it up and used it in his absence, though they haven’t.

She tucks the moment away into her big, drunk brain for later use.

He takes a step towards her, his hand moving to the small of her back of its own accord. He doesn’t realize what he’s done until it’s too late, his palm is firm against her back. 

Fuck it. 

He guides her forward, through the door and away from the parking lot. Geoff’s got the keys to the Jeep, and it’s just a short walk down the beach anyway. 

And then his hand rests on the thin silky fabric covering her back and she freezes again with her hand on the door. She recovers faster this time and hopes he can’t feel her shuddering breath through his touch.

His hand is so warm.

“This way,” he murmurs as he steers her towards the stairs that lead to the boardwalk. His hand is steady on her back with each step they climb. He doesn’t drop away from her until they reach the top. 

She’s grateful they’re not driving. The fresh air should help her sober up a little. She watches her toes as she walks with him and finds she can’t concentrate on anything other than feeling all five of his perfect fingers that are so close they may as well be on her bare skin. He hasn’t dropped his hand yet. She shouldn’t consider why.

“It’s just like, five minutes down the boardwalk, if that’s cool,” he says with a sideways glance at her as they walk, his hands sliding into his pockets.

“That’s fine,” she answers breezily, blinking quickly when his hand leaves the small of her back. She fights against the desire to curl into him and suck up all his body heat. She laces her fingers together in front of her and tugs at them to keep herself busy. 

“Do you live close by?” 

He watches her concentrate on her feet, then feels like he’s been caught once she finally looks up. He presses his lips together and nods, then looks away from her, trying to play it off like he wasn’t staring. 

She’s a little startled to look up and see he’s watching her. Maybe she shouldn’t be, because she’s been doing the same thing to him all night. She’s curious about him. Maybe he’s just curious too.

“My house is back the other way, though. Lease it with Geoff,” he looks back at her, brow quirked, “Do you remember Geoff? He was the year below yours.” 

He doesn’t know why he’s asking about G. He doesn’t know why he even mentioned him at all. He’s also starting to feel embarrassed by admitting to being a dude in his thirties who still lives with one of his bros from college. 

She’s probably used to far more sophisticated company than he can provide, but he tries not to dwell on it. 

She smiles. “I remember Geoff. Nice guy.” 

He lives with his best friend from college. That doesn’t necessarily mean he’s single, but it at least means he’s not too serious with anyone.

NOT THAT IT MATTERS!

She berates herself and shakes her head a little to rid herself of the train of thought.

“And how long have you had the instrument shop?”

“Almost as long as I’ve been in Avila,” he answers, “It was a shit little property I had to fix up but I got it only like, three months after moving here.”

He feels like he’s being interviewed, but he really doesn’t mind. The idea that she’s curious about him, interested in what his life’s been like, makes his heart stutter against his ribs. 

Yet, bitterness and resentment nag the back of his mind. 

If you’re so curious, why didn’t you call?

He never changed his number. She did. 

He blinks. Takes a breath. He doesn’t want to be angry. He forgave her a long time ago. But forgiving her in his head when she’s not in his life hasn’t helped him control his emotions now that she’s showed up again. 

Maya gave up any right to be proud of Shawn a long time ago. But she feels it still, that swell of delight in her chest when he mentions fixing up his shop to make it his own. She knows in some universe somewhere there’s a version of her that was with him the whole time, that helped him choose paint colors, that massaged his shoulders when he came home from spending long hours hunched over a fussy guitar. 

This version of her remains quiet and tucks her hair behind her ears, fighting a shiver from the cool sea breeze. 

They reach his shop’s block, and he guides her down the stairs and to the sidewalk. He moves past her as they approach the small house that holds his creations.

He glances back at her with a soft smile before pulling his key from his pocket and slipping it into the lock. The door swings open and he reaches inside to flick on the light. He turns back to Maya, steps aside. 

“Well, um. Welcome,” he says with a grin. 

He guides her into his domain. It smells like wood and lacquer and power tools. She cracks a smile and giggles.

“Wow. Look at this. This is like your fuckin’ Candy Land,” she jokes, shaking her head.

“Show me your favorite one.”

She sounds genuinely impressed, and he can’t help but preen. He’s proud of himself, of this little world he’s built. Even on the worst days, where it feels like nothing goes right, he still loves it. Part of him aches with the need for her to love it, too.

“Oh, uh—“ he’s taken aback, stuck for a moment because his favorite one is the one he used to write songs for her on. Not that he has to tell her that, but still. He’ll know. 

“She— it’s in the back,” he says, a flush spreading across his cheeks. “Hold on, just— I’ll be right back.”

Maya chuckles at his stumbling over calling the guitar “she.”

“What an odd male tradition,” she blabs, knowing she gets philosophical and feminist sometimes when she’s drunk, “To name manmade objects after women. Like ships and cars and, I guess, guitars. It’s so bizarre to me. I don’t know whether to be offended on behalf of women or be charmed by the boyishness of it.”

She snaps her lips shut and makes a face at herself for her meaningless chatter. She’s running curious fingers along a vibrantly purple electric bass when she hears him reenter the main studio area.

She goes off on a tangent he’s heard from her before, just not about guitars specifically. It makes his heart twist. She makes it so easy to remember all the reasons he fell in love with her. 

(Not that he ever forgot.)

He slips past her into his office. Lulu is tucked away in her stand in his closet and he decides maybe he should stop calling a guitar he named after his ex a ‘she.’  

He holds the guitar up, spins it around to examine the shiny black lacquer-coated body before heading back into the main room, where Maya is admiring some of the electric basses that line the wall. 

“This is the first perfect guitar I ever made. I don’t think I’ll ever sell it.” 

She turns and stares at the work of art in his hands. She doesn’t really know much about guitars, anything she does know was picked up from snippets of conversations with him many years ago, but it certainly looks perfect to her.

“Wow,” she says again dumbly, “She’s beautiful. I’m-- wow. Can I hold her?”

She looks at the guitar like it’s as beautiful as he thinks it is, and that settles something deep in the pit of his stomach. All he’s ever wanted is for her to see him. He swears there’s no better feeling in the world than when she does. 

Like now, when she asks to hold his guitar like it’s his fucking kid or something. He laughs, bright and loud, head falling back for a moment. 

“Yeah,” he takes a breath, laughter subsiding as he looks down at her, “Yeah, you can hold her. She’s tough.” 

He holds Lulu by the body and offers her neck first to Maya. He wonders if she remembers any of the chords he taught her. 

Shawn’s laughing at her in a way that makes her feel more alive than she has in so long. It’s not judgmental or teasing, it’s… delighted. She delights him.

Or she used to. Maybe he’s just drunk.

Either way, he willingly hands off his pride and joy like he’s not worried at all that she’ll harm it. Maya takes the guitar and slings the strap over her shoulder, cradling it under her arm.

It feels good.

She hums, running her fingertips along its dips and curves, admiring his work. It really is stunning. She’s so stupid proud. And she can’t say it out loud.

Her fingers shift into place to pluck out a couple chords he taught her. She doesn’t remember the names of them. She looks up at him to see if maybe he looks just a little proud of her too.

She touches his guitar like it’s something precious and his breath catches in his throat. He watches her take such care with such an important piece of his life and he feels like he’s falling, stumbling into his love for her. 

He’s never managed to let go of it, but he got pretty good at pretending it wasn’t there. He was an expert at convincing himself it didn’t fill his heart too much for anyone else to fit, that it was a scar, a slowly fading reminder of what it means to be cared for, a tip for the future. 

It’s not so easy pretending now, watching Maya’s fingers glide across the sleek body of a guitar he’s known longer than he ever actually knew her. 

Finally, her fingers find the strings, and she answers his silent curiosity. Her fingers flick A, A, D, E minor, A. 

Those were always the easiest chords for her to remember. Her fingers know them well. It’s so, incredibly sexy. 

Shawn sucks in a breath, then realizes she’s looking at him, like maybe she’s expecting him to say something. He wets his lip, takes a step towards her.

“You remember,” he says, voice a deep rasp. He’s not sure he’s talking about the chords. It’s everything. She remembers everything. She has to, because he does. It burns so fucking brightly in his memory he can’t stand to be in the same room with himself sometimes. 

He looks down at the guitar between them, thumbs digging into his palms to stop himself from pulling it off of her. It’s the only barrier between him and an incredibly stupid decision. 

The way he inhales sharply makes her feel like there’s finite oxygen between them. His intake of breath is sucking the air from her lungs. She doesn’t mind. She’s glad to be rid of it if it becomes his instead.

Her head is all fuzzy. His voice is low and scratchy and it reminds her of when she would wake up in his arms in the middle of the night and without her even moving, even speaking, he would notice and whisper to her until she fell asleep again. 

As he steps closer, her awareness heightens. She clings to the guitar like a shield. As badly as she wants him, a piece of her knows better than to let herself have him again, even when he’s looking at her like this. Even when every word out of his mouth feels like his feelings haven’t changed, not even after so long. Not even after she left him for a life she has recently decided she doesn’t even want. 

His hands stay still, but he looks back at her. “Do you remember that song you wrote?” 

He does. It was three chords. Three chords and lasted about an eight count before he pulled the guitar from her lap and made her come on his tongue and needy fingers. 

She swallows and closes her eyes because looking at him is too fucking much right now. She exhales shakily and nods. “I… I remember.”

She definitely remembers. She doesn’t even make a conscious decision to start playing it, it just happens, sort of like everything else between them right now. It’s instinctive with them.

Her fingers pinch and curl and pluck while her lips quiver. She remembers. She remembers the way she cried out his name while her back arched off the bed, but he didn’t let up. She remembers panting, chanting ‘I love you’ over and over until he crawled up her body and planted his lips against hers with a smile to shut her up.

“I remember,” she whispers again.

Her eyes flutter shut. He’s closer to her than he’s been in years and he can see every freckle, every line, every curve of her face. He studies every one, sketched a new portrait of her for his memory, just in case he’s not lucky enough to get this close again. 

He knows she’s thinking about it now, about the way he used to love her so thoroughly. He’s not sure what possessed him to remind her, other than his addiction to her. Or more like his need not to be the only addict. 

He lifts one hand carefully to hers, stilling her fingers against the neck of his guitar. His heart stops; the delicate press of his skin against hers is overwhelming, yet so slight. Somehow, curling his fingers around hers is far more intimate than the press of his palm to her back. 

Maya gasps in a breath at the touch of his fingers to hers. It almost puts tears in her eyes but she holds on. His touch is so full of every memory, good and bad. It’s like jumping right back into her past with him when he holds her hand like this. 

She doesn’t know what he wants now. She doesn’t even really know what she herself wants. But she lowers her shield, carefully and slowly swings the guitar around her back to hang behind them. Her fingers remain entwined with his.

“Maya,” he breathes, hoping she’ll open her eyes and look at him. He needs to see her eyes. He needs to know if he can read them as well as he used to. 

The hush of his voice has her by the throat. She opens her eyes to see him there, the closest he’s been since they were kids. And now, seeing him here with her, when he’s looking at her like this, she knows what he wants.

She wets her lips like she knows what’s coming. Her voice nearly fails her when she speaks again.

“Remember with me.”

“Lulu,” he chokes, nodding as he holds her gaze, “I do. You know I do.” 

He lifts their tangled fingers to her face, cups her cheek, and kisses her. A gentle press of his lips against hers. 

He steps into her, takes the guitar’s place against her and she shrinks beneath him. Their height difference is always the most overwhelming when they’re chest to chest like this. 

His other hand finds the nape of her neck, his fingertips scratching her scalp gently as he cradles her and sips slowly at her lips. 

He kisses her the way he never gets to in his dream. The way he always wants to, the way she wouldn’t let him the night before she left. 

It burns him from the inside out, and he wonders if she feels it in her bones the way he does. 

Maya falls. 

She falls just the same way she did. She falls the same way she did even just a few days ago when she heard his voice again. 

He’s gentle with her, the way he almost always was. She’s high on it. His lips slip against hers perfectly like they’ve never fallen out of step with each other. She sobs a gasp into his mouth, overwhelmed. 

She steps between his feet and presses into him so close that she can’t help but feel him everywhere. She wraps her arms around his expansive back and shoulders, curling against him with a low mewling noise. 

He tastes like whiskey sour and he smells like sea salt and soap. She feels the tears prick the corners of her eyes. She doesn’t force them back this time. 

He kisses her through the gentle sounds he was hoping she’d make. He kisses her deeper, wants more of her sounds, wants to feel her even closer. 

Her tears on his cheek burn him. He sucks in a startled breath and pulls back, lips and hands together. He blinks down at her, trying to focus his blurry vision. 

“I’m sorry, shit,” he murmurs, hands curling in to firsts. He sees the tears on her cheeks and he wants to cry, too, but he’s not sure why. 

He’s not sure of anything anymore. 

“Maya,” he breathes, urging her to look at him. “I’m—“ still in love with you— “I think I’m a little drunk.” 

Just as soon as she can feel him start to drag her under fully, just as she’s committing to drowning for him, with him, he starts away.

She pants desperately and swipes at her cheeks, flushing hot. 

“It’s… uhm, it’s ok. I am too. It’s just… this. Us. Here in Avila. Y’know, it’s like last time. Only… I guess… not.”

She used to be an incredibly articulate woman. Her words are clunky and meaningless. She can only hope he can guess what she means.

She stumbles over her words and he feels like shit. He’s such an idiot. Brings her to his shop, shows her her namesake guitar, kisses like she’s his to kiss. And she cries. He makes her cry. 

He hates himself for that, and for being so scared. Scared of all the things he wants to tell her. Of how easy it feels to be around her, still, like no time has passed at all. 

She presses her hands to her cheeks and shakes her head.

“Ok then. I think I should go.”

She wants to leave.

“No!” He doesn’t mean to shout, but he can’t let her go, not like this. “I mean— you don’t, Lu, you don’t have to. We can go back to the bar and get something to eat, or y’know, there’s that ice cream stand, with the soft serve and the sugar cones.”

He reaches for her carefully, curls his fingers around her wrists and pulls her hands from her slick, flushed cheeks. 

“Let me get you a cone. Swirl, rainbow sprinkles, right?” 

He wants to buy her ice cream.

He remembers what kind she likes. Of course he does.

Maya feels, all of a sudden, incredibly stupid. With one kiss, he made her completely sober, more sober than she’s been in her life. And lying there between them is their past that they have no answers for. Maya should’ve known better than to let him kiss her like this. She likes answers. She needs answers.

But not tonight.

Her breath catches in her throat. “No,” she rasps, “No, I can’t. I need to… I need to go home.”

With a lurch, she untangles herself from his beautiful guitar and shove it back into his hands. She heads for the door and lets it slam shut behind her, echoing with her clapping footsteps as she hurries down the boardwalk.

--------

Taglist: @smallerinfinities @the-claire-bitch-project @achinglyshawn @infiniteshawn @mendesoft @singanddreamanyway @alone-in-madness @abigfatmess @shawnitsmutual @awkwardfangirl2014 @september-lace @grittyisaho @sinplisticshawn @rollingxstone @yslsaint @randi-eve @fallmoreinlove @heyits-claire @itrocksmysocks @parkerspicedlatte @simpledomain @abeautiful-and-cloudy-day @desire-to-live @jillian-nd @shawnwyr

[thewallofmilessimpson]

Also nothing really important here, but isn’t it fun to talk about other people’s lives, Miles????

Commentary: Sounds like Kevin Stratton really loves, respects, and cares about his wife Connie if the only reason he doesn’t go get the pussy he is offered is because Connie will find out and it won’t be good (she would probably divorce him and take him for all he has), but at least she does the banking and her family cooks all the food you spend a lot of money on. You make them sound like pigs, not leaving any seconds for the one who pays for it but does nothing else but grabs a plate and dashes off like an asshole. Heh. Sounds like Connie and her family more than earn their keep from your bank, Kevin Stratton on the island. I REALLY hope Connie or her 42 people sees this and takes you for all you’ve got.

Re: back at youYahoo/Sent

Miles Simpson <simp2172@bellsouth.net>To:Kevin StrattonTue, Dec 11, 2018 at 8:21 PMHello Kevin, Saints started last week’s game against the Buc’s the same way they left in Dallas not good. Drew was terrible in the first half. We got a punt block in the 2nd half I hope you saw it and scored 25 points in a row. They will be on Monday night next week against the Panthers. Your Bears helped out by beating the Rams now the Saints are back in front. I don’t think the Saints could beat the Bears are the Rams again. We’ll see down the road. Walter’s ex-wife Donna was burned really bad last week. Not a lot of info other than she was in the kitchen. Somebody said a towel caught on fire and she tied to beat it out with another towel and it caught on fire and wrapped around her but I don’t believe that. I think she was cooking meth and kaboom. Her boyfriend just got out of jail for doing it. The VR glasses you ordered is it the kind you can buy games for and stuff like that? I picked up Ronnie today after his chemo trip. He looks 80 years old and skinny. I’ll get him next Tuesday too. Bruce dropped off Reggie this morning at 5:30 like always and when I got up at 7:30 he had shit in my room right in the doorway on the carpet and it was the soft kind that mashes into the carpet when you try to pick it up. Then at noon he pissed on the floor by his food bowl and when I got back from picking up Ronnie he had pissed again. It’s this Cushing disease causing him to be this way. I told Bruce this afternoon I’m not keeping him after this year so he’s going to have him put to sleep in a week. I’ve kept him now probably 5 years and I want to be free to go somewhere and not have to deal with a deaf half blind bi-polar dog. He was a good dog but he’s not himself anymore. Getting the smoker out tomorrow and cooking 10 lbs of quarters and 20 thighs. I wish they would put the pork butts on sell I’m totally out! I’ll buy 4 next time. Cook 2 and freeze 2. I buy my baby back’s at Walmart and they say Extra meaty and they are. I usually smoke 3 racks cut them in half and freeze 6 half racks. I’ll get a half rack out but can usually only eat 3 ribs before I’m full. They’re like $3.30 a lb but are good. There’s a show that comes on Tuesday night on TBS at 9:30 called The Guest Book. Tonight’s the 8th or 9th one this season. You should give it a try it’s pretty dam funny. It would be great if you could get it on Net Flix and watch it from the start. Later Buddy, Miles > On Dec 3, 2018, at 11:18 AM, Kevin Stratton <johnst13@yahoo.com> wrote: > > Good morning Miles > > Well I'm still disappointed about the Saints loss. They did not look like the same team at all. But they are still way up on every team in their division and I don't think that will change before the playoffs. I still hope for home field advantage through the playoffs but they better win out. I have always hated the Chargers so that was a bad game last night too. I did not get to see the last LSU game and in a way I'm glad as that is a bad way to loose.  I saw you had some bad weather last week in your area. You made it through alright? We have a new gas station close by my house. So now I have a sub sandwich place called Blimpie's, a Pizza Inn, coffee shop and a cooking place inside that makes local food plus a pretty big grocery store all inside of one building. They are also are extending the side of the building to house a branch bank for some banking operation not sure which as yet. So I might have to open an account there as it would be a handy place instead of going into town and stand in long lines. Not that I do any banking. I make Connie do all of that stuff. We had 42 people for Thanksgiving at our other house and hopefully not that many for Christmas but it might be close to that same amount of people. I don't do any of the cooking as Connie's brothers and sisters do that work I just pay for all the food. I just grab a plate and go. I don't get seconds as there is never enough to go around even with 2 turkeys and a spiral sliced ham and a pork leg. And 7 pies and two cheese cakes. Sorry to hear about your cousin as stage 4 is not that long to live. Is he on that Hospice's service? As they are free and they keep someone like your cousin pain free with heavy drugs like Morphine. See if you can sign him up as I'm pretty sure it is free even out in the country. Sorry about you dying for pussy as I could get you some down here. I get offered pussy from some girls I've known for years and they don't care if your married or single. They just want some sex or for you to throw some money their way. They call that country pay down here.  And there is still about 8 to 10 women to a man down here. And some of them look pretty damn good and are hard to turn down. But it is such a small community in many ways that it would all get back to Connie. And that would be bad let me tell you. The VR glasses comes with it's own screen and does not use a phone which I hope will work out to help me fly. I have my plumber working on the plumbing upstairs and the electrician doing a plan of his work so I can insulate and then sheet rock the walls. I still have to get my A/C guy to finish his stub out work before I insulate and drywall upstairs too. I'm doing the laundry right now and trying to fix a roof leak in my office as I keep chasing the water that comes in from the rain. Well I guess that is all that is on my mind right now. Oh we had 3 murders last month and none are really solved. We hear all kinds of rumors but nothing for sure. One was a guy who worked at a cruise ship store called Diamond International as a manager. That one might be over a woman from a ex-husband. And other one was a local teacher that had a partner running and owning a few taxi cabs and that had been arguing. The third one was gringo in the real estate business who I knew well. They had a memorial service yesterday on the beach at a big bar. I  went just to show my face but I hate those kind of services. His daughter came down to see about her fathers things. They found his glasses and blood on his stoop by his front door. As that looks like where he was killed and then days later they found his body and took that over to the mainland for a autopsy and they will cremate him and send the ashes to the daughter.  It might of been his next door neighbor who he was having problems with or a love triangle. Or the police killed him for something he saw and reported that the police and then they follwed him home and killed him but that is just another rumor. Well I guess that is all that is on my mind right now. > Later amigo! > k > >

[samjohnmichael]

~ Tagged ~

Tagged by @tarmahartley sorry it took a while for me to get to, but thank you!

Rules: Tag ten followers you want to get know better.

Name: Sam

Gender: Male

Star sign: Pisces

Height: tbh idek I haven’t been measured in years but somewhere around 5′8/9

Sexuality: I usually say Bisexual bc i cba everytime someone asks me what Pansexual is, but either or

House: Ravenclaw I’d say, but I always get Slytherin in the tests.. not sure why hahah

What image to you use as your wallpaper: Well when I was tagged in this it was a picture of one of my flatmates (was a bit of a mess after a night out and it made me laugh hahah) but now it’s back to my regular which is a Ace Attorney background which has Apollo, Trucy and Klav in it. Kinda want a Kyoko one from Danganronpa v1 bc she’s my fav and I love her

Have you ever had a crush on a teacher? I had a few who were good looking but none that I had a crush on

Where do you see yourself In ten years? Hopefully in a secure job, not single and a whole lot happier hah

If you could be anywhere right now where would you be? I feel like this says a lot about me but a classic sesh night out would be brill rn, all of these end of year finals for uni are draining the life out of me hah.

What was your coolest Halloween costume? Ngl mine have all been pretty normal but I had one when I was younger which was like a full body skeleton costume which had like cool graphic design and like this pumping heart sticking out, probably my most memorable one hahah. My mum did this face paint with it too which I remember being good.

Favorite 90s tv show? Cliche but I love Friends

Last kiss: On a night out

Have you ever been stood up?:  Apart from plans with mates which end up getting rearranged anyway, nope.

Have you ever been to Las Vegas: Nope

Favorite pair of shoes: I have two pairs of Adidas Gazelle in Black and White and another in Grey and Red and I loovveeee them.

Favorite fruit: Either Musk Melon or Mango

Favorite book:  I don’t really read books omg

The stupidest thing you’ve ever done: Idk if this is the most stupid but recently I was talking to a mate about this lecturer as I was leaving complaining about how much money I’m spending on these lecturers and that he seems so disinterested and talks too slowly, and he says to me to stop while laughing and I was like “what why”.. Turns out the lecturer was right behind me the whole time hahah oops.

All-time favorite tv shows: I’m including Netflix originals in this bc Idc. I love Riverdale so much rn and I hate that I have to wait so long for season 3 omfg. Rupaul’s drag race is my life rn too. Watched Friends and The Simpsons my whole life too.

All-time favorite songs: PREPARE FOR A LIST AND A HALF. Twin Skeletons / Fall Out Boy, Sweater Weather / The Neighbourhood, RIP 2 My Youth / The Neighbourhood, for him. / Troye Sivan, Holding On To You / twenty one pilots, Call You Up / Viola Beach, Swings & Waterslides / Viola Beach, The Sound / The 1975, Asking For It / Shinedown, Triggered / Chase Atlantic, [controversial ik -- idk the whole details and legitimacy of that situation but the whole Cry Baby album by Melanie], Red Lights Indicates Doors Are Secure / Arctic Monkeys, Heaven In Hiding / halsey, Sad Story (Out Of Luck) / Merk & Kremont, Personal / The Vamps, Froot / Marina & The Diamonds, drugs / EDEN, Two Fingers / Dan Caplen, I’m Not Sorry / The Pigeon Detectives, Dust / The Neighbourhood, My My My! / Troye Sivan, The Last Of The Real Ones / Fall Out Boy, Finesse [Remix] / Bruno Mars & Cardi B, Cruel / Snakehips & ZAYN, Africa / Toto (fight me), Desire [ Gryffin Remix ] / Years & Years, Sanctify /  Years & Years, King /  Years & Years, Greedy / Ariana Grande, Glowing Eyes / twenty one pilots, Ugly / Jaira Burns, No Tears Left To Cry / Ariana Grande, The Boss / Diana Ross (fight me), The Village / Wrabel, How To Be A Heartbreaker / Marina & The Diamonds, The Beginning / RuPaul, One Last Time / Ariana Grande, Act My Age / One Direction (fight me), Too Fucked Up To Call / 2AM Club, Friends / Chase Atlantic, Into You / Ariana Grande

Probably forgot some but eh what’cha gonna do

Last movie you saw:  Love, Simon and jfc I loved it

I tag: @gemmanji, @saltyscylla, @all-alone-in-a-daydream @wakeupdormouse, @okayjamiie, @guy-with-the-green-eyes @skyluigi2, @franzyvonkarma, @unreasonablereasoner & whoever else wants to

Don’t feel obligated to do this if you don’t want to^^

[surveysonfleek]

851.

Who was the last person you talked to, whose name started with ‘S?’ sinead.

When was the last time you met someone who seemed very unpleasant? tonight. some people are just generally horrible to everyone. it’s quite sad.

Name everyone you’ve had an online conversation with today. maria, ger, irene, milos, toni, sinead.

How many people have you kissed, whose name started with ‘J?’ i haven’t.

When was the last time you turned down an invitation to go somewhere? Why? my friend’s boat party. we’re not super close and i genuinely forgot about it and ended up working :(

Who was the last person to cry in front of you? someone at work.

Do you know why they were crying? no idea, they were talking to someone else too so i didn’t wna pry.

How many Facebook friends do you have? around 300.

Is there anyone on your “friends” list that you dislike? nope.

Is there anyone you dislike, that you have to see/speak to regularly? haha yes.

Does anyone have a romantic interest in you, that you don’t return? not that i know of.

When was the last time you ate a cookie? yesterday.

Has either of your parents ever borrowed your computer? no, everyone’s got their own.

Have your parents met the person you’re currently interested in? yes.

When you’re interested in someone, do you let them know? i’ve been with the same person forever. so i let him know easily lol.

Is there anything happening tomorrow that you’re looking forward to? yes!

Have you ever kissed anyone named Daniel or Danielle? no.

How many alcoholic drinks have you had in the last week? i had maybe seven drinks last saturday over a whole day and night coz of a bachelorette party. i spaced my drinks out so far apart so i didn’t get that drunk lol.

Have you ever received a compliment on anything you’re wearing? not anything i’m wearing right now.

Have you had any caffeinated beverages today? nope.

What was the last alcoholic drink you tried for the first time? strawberry long island iced tea. it’s amazing!

Did you like it? omg yes!!!

Have you eaten any chocolate today? What kind? nope.

How many people have you hugged today? no one.

Do you have a favorite hair color or eye color on your preferred sex? not really.

Is there anyone on your mind at the moment? yes.

When was the last time you had Pop Tarts? What flavor were they? it’s been years. probably in canada back in 2014. i only remember this because my boyfriend tried one for the very first time.

Is your birth year an odd or even number? even.

Have you ever had a kinky dream about a celebrity? most likely.

When was the last time you had Nutella? i feel like the cake i had on the weekend had nutella in it, but i’m not 100% sure.

Who is your favorite character in “The Simpsons?” ralph.

What are your parents’ middle names? neither of them have one.

Are your eyes the same color as your siblings’ eyes? yes.

Have you received any compliments about your appearance today? i think so? someone said i look like a completely different person without my glasses on, idk if that’s a good or bad thing.

Do you have any ice cream in your freezer? What flavor is it? yes. vanilla.

Have you spoken to any of your neighbors today? no.

What food(s) have you eaten a lot of recently? rice.

Have you recently bought a gift for anyone? yes.

Have you gone out with someone, then ruined the friendship you had before? nah.

Do you think you will be married by the time you’re 25? haha i’m over 25 and still not married.

Who did you last ride in the car with under the age of 18? omg no idea tbh.

Did you sleep alone last night? yes.

Would you rather have your nose or tongue pierced? nose. i already have it pierced.

Have you hugged anyone in the last 72 hours? yes.

You can only drink one liquid for the rest of you life. What is it? water.

Do you think you can last in a relationship for 3 months? yes, easily.

Do you have a younger sister? yes.

Did you eat a cookie today? no.

Have you ever fallen asleep in someone’s arms? yes.

In your opinion, which is more attractive: nice biceps or washboard abs? biceps. more noticeable in normal clothing.

Do you have any currency that’s not your native country’s? yes, plenty.

Are you talking to anyone right now? nope.

Do you use the microwave a lot when it comes to cooking food? hardly ever. i only really use the microwave to heat leftovers.

Are you any good at poker? i’m okay. not amazing but i know what i’m doing.

What do you want? sleep and a massage.

Whose house did you go to last night? my boyfriend’s.

Why are you on the computer right now? coz it’s just routine before i go to sleep lol. 

Last text from? sinead.

Any plans for tomorrow? yes, definitely dinner at night with my boyfriend.

Are you currently trying to get over someone? no.

Would you say that people consider you a major flirt? hell no.

What is the weather like right now? cold.

What does your last sent text say? fml.

So, have you had any bread today? If so, was it good bread? If you haven’t had bread, are you gonna eat some? nope.

Who sits in front of you in Math class? not in school.

Do you know anyone who plays the harmonica? no.

Have you ever been hypnotized? no. not interested in it either.

Have you ever been on a gondola lift? yes.

Do you know anyone who’s been on TV? If so, which show? me haha. drop the mic.

Are you ever tempted to step on the crunchy leaves? yes.

Did you ever have any unreasonable teachers? eh not really.

Do you have any lockets with pictures inside? yes.

[them0onunderstoodmybrain]

1-154 🤔😂 Cba thinking of anything for 155 🙄

1: Full nameCaitlin Simpson2: Zodiac signLeo3: 3 FearsDeath4: 3 things I loveSleep, my Xbox, food 5: 4 turns onPeople who can spell, someone who buys me food, people who let me sleep, people who don't wake me up 🤷🏽‍♀️6: 4 turns offPsychos, people not over there exs, people who can't spell 🤔😂, people full of themselves 7: My best friendAbby 8: Sexual orientationDunno straight? Jk gay as fuck 9: My best first dateNever had a date 10: How tall am I5"6 11: What do I missSleep12: What time were I bornDunno weirdo 13: Favourite colorRed14: Do I have a crushNo time for that 15: Favourite quote'If you tell a big enough lie and tell it frequently enough, it will be believed'16: Favourite placeMy bed 17: Favourite foodLasagne 18: Do I use sarcasmI'm gonna say no 🤔😂19: What am I listening to right nowA YouTube video 20: First thing I notice in new personEyes 21: Shoe size8/9 depends what shoe22: Eye ColorBlue/Grey23: Hair colorBrown 24: Favourite style of clothingTracksuit bottoms and hoodie25: Ever done a prank call?What stupid question obviously 26: What colour of underwear I'm wearing now?Well that was effort white and black 🤔😂27: Meaning behind my URLDunno can't figure it out 28: Favourite movieCool running 29: Favourite songThere all equal 30: Favourite bandParamore 31: How I feel right nowSleepy32: Someone I loveMy dog33: My current relationship statusSingle as fuck 34: My relationship with my parentsAs about as existent as my spelling 35: Favourite holidayBarbados 36: Tattoos and piercing i have2 tattoos no piercings37: Tattoos and piercing i wantAbout 100 more tattoos 38: The reason I joined TumblrWho even knows 39: Do I and my last ex hate each other?Nah best friends on Snapchat 😂40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts?Never 💔 41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted?Well that would be weird no42: When did I last hold hands?I hold hands with my dog all the time 😊43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning?About 5 minutes 44: Have I shaved your legs in the past three days?Probs not 😂45: Where am I right now?In bed46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me?The floor 47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level?Loud48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad?Mum 49: Am I excited for anything?Sleep 50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to?Yahhhhhhh51: How often do I wear a fake smile?Everyday 52: When was the last time I hugged someone?Today 53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me?I'd sure hope they were 😂54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not?100%55: What is something I disliked about today?I had to work 56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?Donald trump 🤔😂😂😂57: What do I think about most?When I will spell correctly 58: What’s my strangest talent?Sleeping for 12 hours 59: Do I have any strange phobias?No60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?Behind 61: What was the last lie I told?I'll be there in 562: Do I perfer talking on the phone or video chatting online?Phone, I'm too lazy to text, is this still going 63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens?Sure both 64: Do I believe in magic?Sure65: Do I believe in luck?Am Irish so sure 66: What's the weather like right now? Not looking check your app it will tell you67: What was the last book I've read?Can't read 68: Do I like the smell of gasoline?What the hell? 69: Do I have any nicknames?Yes mop or mopanator 🤷🏽‍♀️70: What was the worst injury I've ever had?Broken my leg in 4 places 71: Do I spend money or save it?Spend that dollllar72: Can I touch my nose with a tounge?Clearly not 73: Is there anything pink in 10 feets from me?The walls 74: Favourite animal?Monkey! 75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM?Probs texting the twat who's making me answer this 🤔76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is?Simpson 😂😂😂77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it?🤷🏽‍♀️78: How can you win my heart?Buy me food 79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone?'Peace out motherfuckers' 80: What is my favorite word?Dope 81: My top 5 blogs on tumblrThey all suck 82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say?'Dig my hole'83: Do I have any relatives in jail?😂😂😂😂😂 yah 84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power?To pause time 85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on?If I liked some 86: What is my current desktop picture?The galaxy 87: Had sex?What's sex? 88: Bought condoms?All the time 89: Gotten pregnant?All the time too 90: Failed a class?My life that91: Kissed a boy?No 92: Kissed a girl?Yes 93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain?Yes 94: Had job?Too many 95: Left the house without my wallet?Errrrr everyday 96: Bullied someone on the internet?Never I'm an 😇😇😇97: Had sex in public?How disgusting 98: Played on a sports team?Yes 99: Smoked weed?Yes 100: Did drugs?Yes 101: Smoked cigarettes?Yes 102: Drank alcohol? Yes 103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan?I eat chicken does that count104: Been overweight?Think I still am 105: Been underweight?Never 106: Been to a wedding?No 107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight?Obvs 108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight?Yah 109: Been outside my home country?Yes110: Gotten my heart broken?Yeah? Wanna fix it? 😂😂😂111: Been to a professional sports game?Yes112: Broken a bone?Yes113: Cut myself?Yes114: Been to prom?Yes115: Been in airplane?Yes116: Fly by helicopter?What am I a Tory supporter? 117: What concerts have I been to?One the summer time ball I think 118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex?Is sure hope so 119: Learned another language?Was meant to learn French 🤔120: Wore make up?Once 121: Lost my virginity before I was 18?Nope122: Had oral sex?Disgusting 😂😂123: Dyed my hair?Nope 124: Voted in a presidential election?Sure 125: Rode in an ambulance?Think so 126: Had a surgery?Maybe? 127: Met someone famous?Yes 128: Stalked someone on a social network?Who hasn't 129: Peed outside?Obviously 130: Been fishing?Yah 131: Helped with charity?Yup 132: Been rejected by a crush?Never I reject them 133: Broken a mirror?I ain't that ugly 134: What do I want for birthday?A Nintendo switch, you best be getting me one 🤔135: How many kids do I want and what will be their names?2, Donald and Teresa 136: Was I named after anyone?Nope 137: Do I like my handwriting?Ewwww no 138: What was my favourite toy as a child?Buzz light year 😍139: Favourite Tv Show?Criminal minds 140: Where do I want to live when older?Somewhere hot maybe Barbados 141: Play any musical instrument?I play guitar hero? 142: One of my scars, how did I get it?I have a scar on my hand that was given to me by my manager in McDonald's 143: Favourite pizza toping?Pepperoni 144: Am I afraid of the dark?No 145: Am I afraid of heights?No 146: Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad?Probably 147: Have I ever tried my hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end?Yah 148: What I'm really bad atWaking up before 12, and spelling 😂😂149: What my greatest achievments areAnswering all of these 150: The meanest thing somebody has ever said to me'It's not about the spelling' 😫😫😂😂😂151: What I'd do if I won in a lotteryGive some to my mum put some away for my sister spend the rest 152: What do I like about myselfMy eyes 153: My closest Tumblr friendNone they suck 154: Something I fantasise aboutWhen I'm going to bed next and if I'll ever spell correctly PS I hate you 😊

[retro-scorpio]

Get To Know Me, Part Two

The following questions are from https://askgxmes.tumblr.com/. Rather than repost a million times, I’m just going to compile everything in this post. However, if you like any of the questions, feel free to check them out by clicking the link.

Favorite Month Of The Year: October

Do I Believe In Soulmates: I’m not sure

Pets: Four Cats (Three Males, One Female)

---Names of Pets: Tilly, Ras Putin, Bobbin, and Gizmo

If I Could Live Anywhere In The World, Where Would I Live: This is going to sound pretty stereotypical of me to say as a white girl living in the United States, and I apologize in advance, because I know that there are plenty of countries around the world that are beautiful, but Britain.

What Subject Was I The Best At In School: English (unsurprisingly)

Biggest Fears: If we’re talking tangible, it would be geese and getting bit by a dog, but if we’re talking abstract, then it would have to be rejection.

Favorite Holiday: Halloween

Favorite Weather: Sunny with big, fluffy white clouds; 70 to 80 Degrees Fahrenheit Temperature; gray, cloudy days where everything is quiet; nights where there’s freshly fallen snow on the ground and there’s no one around to mess it up

Hot Chocolate Or Coffee: Hot Chocolate, 100%

Countryside Or City: As someone who lives in a suburb, there are aspects of both the countryside and the city that appeal to me.

Strawberries Or Raspberries: Strawberries

Boots Or Sandals: Boots. I hate showing off my feet.

Books Or Movies: Books

Music Or TV: Music

Morning Or Evening: Evening

Leather Or Denim Jackets: Leather looks cooler, but denim is more practical.

Longest Time I’ve Ever Gone Without Sleep: Over 24 hours when I was in high school; it spanned over a school day.

A Dream For The Future: I would like to become an archivist at a world-renowned museum.

Earliest Memory: My dad chaperoning a field trip for the local history center/park. He took my group off to the side at this bridge where there was a spot for a pocketwatch, and he took out his pocketwatch and set it in the spot.

Person I Miss The Most Right Now: A Guy Who Represents a Missed Romantic Opportunity

Favorite Person: My mom, closely followed by Harry Styles. My dad comes third.

Favorite Thing About Myself: My Eyes

What Dream Do I Remember Most Vividly: It’s a tie between the nightmare I had as I was switching elementary schools and the dream I had that cemented my crush for Harry Styles.

Childhood Nickname: Anna Banana

The Height I Wish I Was: 5′9″ (currently 5′7″)

How Many People Have I Truly Loved: 2.5. If you want to count cats as people, 6.5.

My Most Prized Possession: A First Draft Of A Pair of Dress Pants I Got At A Thrift Store

Most Important Quality In A Partner: Honesty

Something That I’m Self Conscious About: The way I talk and the way my voice sounds. 

---Explanation: I have a speech disability that makes it difficult for me to speak sometimes.

Favorite Film: A Clockwork Orange

Favorite TV Show: The Simpsons

Do I Play A Sport: Currently, no. I used to bowl from nine all the way through my senior year of high school.

Can I Sleep In Jeans: Through the night, no. I don’t mind doing so if I’m taking a nap.

Do I Like Spiders: I think they’re pretty cool creatures.

Do I Believe In Ghosts: Yes

My Initials: AMB

Have I Ever Smoked: No

Can I Ride A Bike: Yes

Least Favorite Food: Candied Yams

Favorite Number: 7

Relationship Status: Single For My Entire Life Up Until This Point

Do I Like Rain: I like the sound of rain and the aesthetic of it, but I don’t like getting caught in it.

My Aesthetic: The Intersection of Classy And Vintage

Do I Like Sand: It’s alright, I guess.

Do I Like Being Barefoot: Unless my feet are freezing, yes.

How Many Lipsticks Do I Own: Less Than Five

Favorite Day Of The Week: Saturday

Thoughts On Sleeping In Cars: Necessary if you’re a passenger during a long road trip and you don’t need to be the navigator.

Do I Like Trains: Yes

Thoughts On The Moon: The best thing about the moon is when it’s first rising and it’s closer to the Earth than normal and it appears round and the color of vanilla ice cream or slightly yellowed parchment.

Do I Swear A Lot: In my head, yes.

Something That Makes Me Happy: Music

Something That Makes Me Sad: Overthinking

What Do I Think Happens After Death: I’m stuck between everything just blacks out and there’s nothing (not even purgatory) and the energy that it took to keep us alive gets transferred somewhere else (kinda like reincarnation).

Am I Afraid Of Death: Not as much as I thought I was before everything with the pandemic happened.

Do I Believe In The Death Penalty: Yes, but only in extreme circumstances, such as a child rapist. The amount in people in death row that are just sitting there rotting is ridiculous, in my opinion.

Have I Ever Bullied Someone: To the best of my memory, no.

When Was The Last Time I Cried And Why: The other night due to the person that I miss the most

Do I Agree With Euthanasia: Yes, and not just for pets. If there’s a person that’s suffering with an illness, a disease, or complications from old age, and it’s clear that they would be better off in whatever place awaits them after death, then they shouldn’t be forced to suffer just for the sake of being alive for their family and friends.

Do I Agree With Animal Testing: Unless it’s for products that directly have to do with animals, or if it’s for scientific purposes and the animals are not being harmed in the process, than no, I don’t agree with animal testing.

Biggest Regret: Hiding behind my speech disability

Do I Think I’m Better Than The Average Person: In some ways, yes.

Do I Think I’m Smarter Than The Average Person: When it comes to academics, yes.

Have I Ever Been To Jail: Thankfully, no.

Do I Think Anyone Is Born Evil: No

Do I Believe People Can Be Evil: Yes

Would I Ever Cheat In A Relationship: No, not even at board games.

Usual Outfit: At the moment, a t-shirt and sweatpants, because I’m inside all day and don’t feel like getting out of my pjs.

Am I Trustworthy: I try to be, yes.

Meaning of My URL: I’m a Scorpio who likes retro things.

Physical Appearance: Long brown wavy hair, bluish/greenish/grayish eyes, freckles everywhere, slim, rectanglish build

Personality: Quiet and reserved in public, goofy around people I know and love

Something I Want To Learn How To Do: A tossup between cooking and being organized.

[procrastinatingwithsurveys]

Who was the last person you talked to, whose name started with ‘S?’ saffron

When was the last time you met someone who seemed very unpleasant? about seven weeks ago

Name everyone you’ve had an online conversation with today. i don’t mean to sound popular but i can’t be bothered to look it up

How many people have you kissed, whose name started with ‘J?’ zero

When was the last time you turned down an invitation to go somewhere? Why? this evening because i know i’ve got work that day that i can’t get out of

Who was the last person to cry in front of you? my best friend

Do you know why they were crying? she had a really rough day/there was something ongoing that was subtle for a while and this was just the pinnacle, if you will

How many Facebook friends do you have? idk and can’t be bothered looking rn

Is there anyone on your “friends” list that you dislike? probably not

Is there anyone you dislike, that you have to see/speak to regularly? not really

Does anyone have a romantic interest in you, that you don’t return? i sure hope not

When was the last time you ate a cookie? last tuesday i think

Has either of your parents ever borrowed your computer? nah

Have your parents met the person you’re currently interested in? lol nope

When you’re interested in someone, do you let them know? lol nope

Is there anything happening tomorrow that you’re looking forward to? yup

Have you ever kissed anyone named Daniel or Danielle? no

How many alcoholic drinks have you had in the last week? half of one haha

Have you ever received a compliment on anything you’re wearing? yup

Have you had any caffeinated beverages today? just one

What was the last alcoholic drink you tried for the first time? i don’t even remember

Did you like it? well

Have you eaten any chocolate today? What kind? not straight up chocolate

How many people have you hugged today? zero :(

Do you have a favorite hair color or eye color on your preferred sex? nah

Is there anyone on your mind at the moment? i wish there wasn’t

When was the last time you had Pop Tarts? What flavour were they? well over a decade ago and i haven’t a clue what flavour they were

Is your birth year an odd or even number? odd

Have you ever had a kinky dream about a celebrity? no

When was the last time you had Nutella? too long ago

Who is your favourite character in “The Simpsons?” don’t have one

What are your parents’ middle names? they don’t have middle names

Are your eyes the same colour as your siblings’ eyes? yup

Have you received any compliments about your appearance today? nope

Do you have any ice cream in your freezer? What flavour is it? yessss double chocolate

Have you spoken to any of your neighbors today? nah

What food(s) have you eaten a lot of recently? junk

Have you recently bought a gift for anyone? nope

Have you gone out with someone, then ruined the friendship you had before? no

Do you think you will be married by the time you’re 25? nope lol

Who did you last ride in the car with under the age of 18? my brothers

Did you sleep alone last night? yup

Would you rather have your nose or tongue pierced? nose

Have you hugged anyone in the last 72 hours? yah

You can only drink one liquid for the rest of you life. What is it? water

Do you think you can last in a relationship for 3 months? i’d like to think so

Do you have a younger sister? no

Did you eat a cookie today? no

Have you ever fallen asleep in someone’s arms? yeah

In your opinion, which is more attractive: nice biceps or washboard abs? nice biceps i guess

Do you have any currency that’s not your native country’s? yup

Are you talking to anyone right now? nope

Do you use the microwave a lot when it comes to cooking food? mostly just to reheat food

Are you any good at poker? don’t know anything about the game my dude

What do you want? ugh i don’t know

Whose house did you go to last night? just home

Why are you on the computer right now? because i was going to do some work and decided to do some surveys instead

Last text from? tamzyn

Any plans for tomorrow? chillin

Are you currently trying to get over someone? honestly i don’t even think i’m trying at this point just suffering ha

Would you say that people consider you a major flirt? i don’t think so but who knows

What is the weather like right now? rainy

What does your last sent text say? don’t remember and i can’t be bothered looking it up lol

So, have you had any bread today? If so, was it good bread? If you haven’t had bread, are you gonna eat some? not today

Who sits in front of you in Math class? wow it’s been a while since i’ve been in school

Do you know anyone who plays the harmonica? kinda

Have you ever been hypnotised? nope

Have you ever been on a gondola lift? yup

Do you know anyone who’s been on TV? If so, which show? yeah and no clue

Are you ever tempted to step on the crunchy leaves? always

Did you ever have any unreasonable teachers? i was probably the unreasonable one

Do you have any lockets with pictures inside? nope

[mikiefresh]

In my last post, I promised to produce another list of artists and groups that I either missed entirely, didn't listen to very much, or whatever. All of these albums were released in 2017, so consider this to be an augmentation of my Best Of list. Had I known about a few of these albums earlier, I would have changed up my Best Of 2017 List to include them, thus reducing the heavy hip hop content. Anyway, again in no particular order, here is some more great music to check out from last year... Priests - Nothing Feels Natural

I am not sure why, but I have always loved poppy, post-punk/indie rock a la Karen O and The Yeah Yeah Yeahs. Maybe it is the memory of seeing Blondie live in concert at The Tibetan Freedom Concert in 1999. Anyway, this band fulfills that in ways that the female-fronted groups from the Best of 2017 list did not. Where Alvvays and The Courtneys had a garage essence to their poppy, punky indie rock, Priests is even more raw, with spoken word lyrics, layered over faster melodies and crunchy guitars. This album is on 6 Best of 2017 lists, including Pitchfork, Billboard, Stereogum, and NPR.  Chicano Batman - Freedom is Free

I love the earlier Chicano Batman stuff, and it physically hurt me to not be able to include this album on my list. It just doesn't have the strong essence of funky, latin rock that I love from the other albums - instead focusing on lighter melodies and softer songs, albeit with lyrics about social issues. However, some other best of lists probably include this album. I say if you like this one, go listen to the older stuff and you will be blown away.  The Weather Station - self-titled 

A self-titled album as your fourth is a bold move in my opinion, however, she seems to have hit her stride with this one. Love songs and ballads presented in a bold, powerful way make up most of this self-titled album. Moody and introspective, the folksy alt-country draws the listener in; "Thirty" is a highlight on the album. She brings to mind Joni Mitchell and Jewel, but is not to be confused with either one. Charly Bliss - Guppy

I don't know how I missed this band - they combine fuzzed out, orchestrated guitars somewhere between Weezer and Radiohead, with sweet, sugary female vocals. I think they really rock. While comparisons to Veruca Salt and Paramore can also be made, it doesn't cheapen the greatness that is Charly Bliss. The music is so fun, I would most definitely have included this album on my Best Of 2017 List.   Tyler Childers - Purgatory

Another artist that I am sad to have missed out on, Tyler Childers plays new country that sounds like the Appalachian mountains, where I spent time every summer of my childhood. Fiddles, bluegrass melodies, and production by Sturgill Simpson brings us yet another great, authentic country artist. I hope this album inspires many new listeners that love old Willie Nelson- and Waylon Jennings- style country. He, also, would have taken a spot on my 50 Best List of 2017. Zola Jesus - Okovi 

Dark, intense, operatic, and stunningly beautiful at times, the newest release by Zola Jesus is not my favorite album; however, the musicality, production, and content here are astounding and notable. Urgent, emotional, compelling, and gothic, this album is for those looking for something that satisfies the darker urges.  Yaeji - EP2

Again, an artist that completely slipped by me...that after discovering, I really like. She sing song raps slowly and methodically, in this hushed, subtle, Korean-English combo that is uniquely catchy and interesting. She is kind of a rapper, it is kind of techno-ish, but her music is hard to define. If you like genre-bending new sounds, check her out. Her version of "Passionfruit" is incredibly dope, possibly better than the original, and has earned a spot on my faves playlist on Spotify. Mount Eerie - A Crow Looked at Me

Certainly the most death-centered, morbid, intensely sad album that I have ever come across. The artist recently lost his wife, and the whole album is dedicated to songs about her life/that loss/the aftermath. If you need a good cry, give this a listen. It sounds like sparse, stripped down Ben Gibbard/Postal Service -esque vocals and music, while maximizing the melancholy simplicity of that sound. This album is sad. It is about death. Listen with caution. I'm sure it will pop up on many best of lists this year.  Danay Suarez - Palabras Manuales

This album is freaking amazing. I don't even know where to start. She sings and raps in Spanish with so much fluidity that listeners will be drawn in immediately. Straddling the line between rapper and singer, jazz and hip hop, she brings out many aspects of her Cuban heritage in her songs. Modern reggae and reggaeton can be heard, but also classic Afro-Cuban rhythms a la Buena Vista Social Club; the mixing of the modern and classic is dope, and will delight listeners of many types of music. If you are into Spanish-language music at all, listen to this. Parquet Courts - MILANO

Finally, a male-fronted post-punk/indie-rock group! Perhaps the most interesting combination album of last year, Italian composer Daniele Luppi's work with Parquet Courts and Karen O produced a throwback sound that is reminiscent of the early NYC punk ethos. The album hearkens back to Velvet Underground, but makes it this new noise, mostly due to Karen O's strong vocals. As stated above, I love Karen O and pretty much everything she does musically. Benjamin Clementine - I Tell A Fly

Benjamin Clementine put out an album in 2016 that absolutely blew me away. I found out about him through an interview with David Byrne (of Talking Heads), and was immediately drawn to its theatrical vocals, piano-driven melodies, and curious song orchestrations. This album makes that album look boring by comparison, full of overly theatrical, cinematic themes, with incredibly powerful, intense vocals, and strangely complex and equally cinematic instrumentation. It would have been on my Best of list for sure, so check it out for something totally unique.  LOOPRAT - In < No Time

I know I hinted that there was already enough hip hop on my Best of 2017 list, but I had to shout out these homies. LOOPRAT is a St. Louis born-and-bred hip hop collective, consisting of over a dozen members. They are 5 MC's, a full band, and a backup singer, and their live shows are incredible. A live hip hop band, most similar to The Roots, but incorporating other elements of hip hop and jazz as well, they play regularly at small colleges in the midwestern region. I've had the pleasure of getting to know 3 of the MC's in the group, and they are on the path to greatness. Watch out for this crew - they are coming for your ears. White Reaper - The World's Best American Band

It is a damn shame that I didn't listen to this album more over the course of the year. It should have been on my Best of 2017 list for sure, especially due to the fact that it is the only true rock and roll album that I listened to all year. These guys play good, old-fashioned American rock and roll, rocking out with party anthems and rock ballads alike. You will see this album on other best of lists for sure. If you like this one, check out both of their earlier albums - you won't be disappointed.  I'm not sure what I've got coming on next week's blog, perhaps something non-music related, considering I have reviewed over 60 artists in the past 2 posts alone. Please feel free to comment below! #musicreviews #showreviews #moviereviews #entertainmentreviews

[literateape]

When Crowdfunding Resembles Opportunism or The Greed in Your Ask is Getting Obvious

By Don Hall

I most recently joined the World of Crowdfunding with my new Patreon Campaign. I’m torn as, in general, I’ve seen far too many of these efforts resemble either a corrupt civil servant trying to raise money for bail or legal fees, someone desperately using it as a replacement for medical insurance or Ian Belknap using GoFundMe to help pay for an office space so he doesn’t have to deal with his kids at home while churning out pedantic screeds on Faceborg. 

Go ahead and Google “crowdfunding abuse” and the list is long and ugly.

When Angela Vela asked me to perform a piece about Greed for her monthly show The Seven Deadly Sins, crowdfunding abuse was my target.

Dear Roger –

I know I haven’t been in touch for a while and I apologize right off the bat for not reaching out to you when you got your new job three years ago or when you got married two years ago or when you and your wife had that baby last year. Obviously, you were in my thoughts but I never took the time to connect after college. My bad, bro.

Remember the time when we both got so drunk that we ended up streaking in the Dillons parking lot? LMAO! I barely do. Thanks for bailing us both out, right?

Anyways, I’m writing to you now because I’m kind of in a bind. I wrote some bad checks about two months ago—I totally thought I had them covered but the places cashed the checks before the date I put on them—I thought you couldn’t do that but apparently you can—and the bank is totally fucking me over. Thank god I’m living with my mom, right?

Seriously, is there any chance I could borrow, like, $450 for a while until I get this all straightened out? I’m good for it, bro.

If it is, here’s my Paypal account or you can just send it directly through Chase Pay.

Thanks.

Yo, Rog!!

Long time, no see, right? How’s the wife and kid? I hope great!

The reason I’m writing is to first, apologize for not getting you that $400 back yet. I know it’s been a couple years but things have been moving really fast around here and I’m thinking you’ll thank me once you see how I spent the money I owe you. If you think of it as an investment into something amazing, I’m sure of it.

I moved out of my mom’s house into her garage (I pay rent so it’s not like charity or anything) and decided that I was going to go into a brand new field. Yes, my degree in Contemporary Greek Philosophy is valuable to me but is not what a sustainable career is made of, right?  So I looked out into the world in search of my calling, right? And it hit me right in the jaw—social media. I spend a huge amount of my time writing funny things on Facebook and Twitter, why not parlay that into a full-time career? So...

I’m in Chicago now, and I’m going to take classes at the famed Second City Training Center. You know, the place that spawned the careers of Bill Murray, Stephen Colbert, that guy from the “Sledgehammer” TV show and the voice of Homer Simpson? I figure that a degree from such an esteemed comedic institution is bound to bolster my street cred with companies looking for clever and sarcastic social media responses so I’m currently enrolled.

Here’s the thing: the $400 I owe you went to pay for some of my first eight weeks but once I get my degree and a job writing the Funny Ha-Ha, I’ll pay you back with interest. OR...

Below is a link to my new Kickstarter Campaign to raise the money to pay for all 15 levels of Second City training. I only need to raise $22,000 for this and after all those levels, I’m pretty much guaranteed a spot on SNL which would be even better than writing for Facebook. LOL! Winky emoji.

Any amount is acceptable and you know I’m good for it. A donation of $500 will get you an autographed photo and front row seats at a live taping of SNL!

Thanks!

Dear Roger –

After Second City level 7 and my continued work at Boston Market, I wanted to die every single day of my life and it took me several years to realize it was because of the environment I was in. So, I picked the next best place: San Francisco, which is close to my dad, since we’ve never gotten to have much of a relationship and I like the weather up here. I found a job (I was hired the same day as my interview, in fact) and I put a bunch of debt on a shiny new credit card to afford the move.

I got the job thinking I was all set to write those funny quips on the company’s social media (I mean, I did have seven levels at the world famous Second City, right?) but I was told I’d have to work in support for an entire year before I would be able to move to a different department. A whole year answering calls and talking to customers just for the hope that someday I’d be able to make memes and Twitter jokes. But that’s neither here nor there. Let’s get back to the situation at hand, shall we?

So here I am, 27-years-old, balancing all sorts of debt and trying to pave a life for myself that doesn’t involve crying in the bathtub every week. Every single one of my coworkers is struggling. They’re taking side jobs, they’re living at home. One of them started a GoFundMe because she couldn’t pay her rent. She ended up leaving the company and moving east, somewhere the minimum wage could double as a living wage. Another wrote on those neat whiteboards we’ve got on every floor begging for help because he was bound to be homeless in two weeks. Fortunately, someone helped him out. At least, I think they did. I actually haven’t seen him in the past few months. Do you think he’s okay? Another guy who got hired, and ultimately let go, was undoubtedly homeless. He brought a big bag with him and stocked up on all those snacks they make sure are on every floor. 

I haven’t bought groceries since I started this job. Not because I’m lazy, but because I got this ten pound bag of rice before I moved here and my meals at home (including the one I’m having as I write this) consist, by and large, of that. Because I can’t afford to buy groceries.

Will you pay my phone bill for me? I just got a text from T-Mobile telling me my bill is due. 

Look, I’ll make you a deal. You don’t have to pay my phone bill. I’ll just disconnect my phone. And I’ll disconnect my home internet, too, even though it’s the only way I can do work for my freelance gig that I haven’t been able to do since I moved here because I’m constantly too stressed to focus on anything but going to sleep as soon as I’m not at work. 

If you could help me out, my PayPal is paypal.me/jimmyzee, my Venmo is jimmyzee (no hyphen). Square Cash is cash.me/$JimZee.

Thanks, bro.

Rogerio!!

You've been so generous in the past and I'm trying to raise money to get a plane ticket and funds for the final auditions for the 2016 season of American Idol.

I went to Disney World a few years ago and did the American Idol experience attraction at MGM. I auditioned and got on the show. They do 5 shows per day where an audience picks the winner of 3 performers. At the end of the day, they have a big show where the 5 winners compete for a Dream Ticket. 

The Dream Ticket is a pass to get to the front of the American Idol Audition Line. I performed and won the small show during the day, then won the final show at the end of the day, getting me the Dream Ticket. They don't expire and you can use them at any auditions. I thought I had lost it, but in a stroke of luck (and possibly fate), I just found it in my files at home.

This could be my last chance to do it and I can't live my life wondering,"What if?" I have this amazing opportunity and hoprfully, with your help, I can live my dream and live life to the very fullest!

Thank you for the chance!!

Hey Everyone!

As many of you know, I am a HUGE fan of ULTRA Music Festival in MIAMI. This will be my 14th year attending and marks my 2nd year moderating the Facebook group. I admittedly have put in TOO MANY hours running the group, making sure it is free from spam and trolls. It has been a lot of fun but it has also stolen a ton of my time. I am hoping that some of the friendships I've made will inspire people to be generous and help me make this trip possible.

Normally March is an abundant month for me but this year I am financially "running on fumes." I have spent the last 2.5 months recovering from a broken ankle, which has kept me from working. In this time I have used up all my reserve cash and now with my trip to Florida right around the corner my credit card bills are looming. I will use this money to pay for the flight, ticket, lodging and food for during the trip. It would be the best birthday present if I got a great response.

I will be eternally grateful to everyone who helps out and would LOVE to meet up with you and take some photos at the festival. Thank you so much for your support. <3

–Jimmy Zee

Roger –

I know why you haven’t returned any of my recent texts or direct messages. You don’t believe that I’m actually sick and I guess I don’t blame you. I can assure you, the cancer is real and I don’t have anyone else to turn to. I need $4,500 to help fund a trip to St. John where there is a shaman there who they say can pray the cancer out of me. Outside shot but I’m also told that when your prognosis is this bad, you gotta bucket list that shit, right?

I know I have no right to even ask but, in case you find it in your heart to help an old (31 years is now OLD!) college buddy out, my GoFundMe profile is linked below.

Jim

[theliterateape]

When Crowdfunding Resembles Opportunism or The Greed in Your Ask is Getting Obvious

By Don Hall

I most recently joined the World of Crowdfunding with my new Patreon Campaign. I’m torn as, in general, I’ve seen far too many of these efforts resemble either a corrupt civil servant trying to raise money for bail or legal fees, someone desperately using it as a replacement for medical insurance or Ian Belknap using GoFundMe to help pay for an office space so he doesn’t have to deal with his kids at home while churning out pedantic screeds on Faceborg. 

Go ahead and Google “crowdfunding abuse” and the list is long and ugly.

When Angela Vela asked me to perform a piece about Greed for her monthly show The Seven Deadly Sins, crowdfunding abuse was my target.

Dear Roger –

I know I haven’t been in touch for a while and I apologize right off the bat for not reaching out to you when you got your new job three years ago or when you got married two years ago or when you and your wife had that baby last year. Obviously, you were in my thoughts but I never took the time to connect after college. My bad, bro.

Remember the time when we both got so drunk that we ended up streaking in the Dillons parking lot? LMAO! I barely do. Thanks for bailing us both out, right?

Anyways, I’m writing to you now because I’m kind of in a bind. I wrote some bad checks about two months ago—I totally thought I had them covered but the places cashed the checks before the date I put on them—I thought you couldn’t do that but apparently you can—and the bank is totally fucking me over. Thank god I’m living with my mom, right?

Seriously, is there any chance I could borrow, like, $450 for a while until I get this all straightened out? I’m good for it, bro.

If it is, here’s my Paypal account or you can just send it directly through Chase Pay.

Thanks.

Yo, Rog!!

Long time, no see, right? How’s the wife and kid? I hope great!

The reason I’m writing is to first, apologize for not getting you that $400 back yet. I know it’s been a couple years but things have been moving really fast around here and I’m thinking you’ll thank me once you see how I spent the money I owe you. If you think of it as an investment into something amazing, I’m sure of it.

I moved out of my mom’s house into her garage (I pay rent so it’s not like charity or anything) and decided that I was going to go into a brand new field. Yes, my degree in Contemporary Greek Philosophy is valuable to me but is not what a sustainable career is made of, right?  So I looked out into the world in search of my calling, right? And it hit me right in the jaw—social media. I spend a huge amount of my time writing funny things on Facebook and Twitter, why not parlay that into a full-time career? So...

I’m in Chicago now, and I’m going to take classes at the famed Second City Training Center. You know, the place that spawned the careers of Bill Murray, Stephen Colbert, that guy from the “Sledgehammer” TV show and the voice of Homer Simpson? I figure that a degree from such an esteemed comedic institution is bound to bolster my street cred with companies looking for clever and sarcastic social media responses so I’m currently enrolled.

Here’s the thing: the $400 I owe you went to pay for some of my first eight weeks but once I get my degree and a job writing the Funny Ha-Ha, I’ll pay you back with interest. OR...

Below is a link to my new Kickstarter Campaign to raise the money to pay for all 15 levels of Second City training. I only need to raise $22,000 for this and after all those levels, I’m pretty much guaranteed a spot on SNL which would be even better than writing for Facebook. LOL! Winky emoji.

Any amount is acceptable and you know I’m good for it. A donation of $500 will get you an autographed photo and front row seats at a live taping of SNL!

Thanks!

Dear Roger –

After Second City level 7 and my continued work at Boston Market, I wanted to die every single day of my life and it took me several years to realize it was because of the environment I was in. So, I picked the next best place: San Francisco, which is close to my dad, since we’ve never gotten to have much of a relationship and I like the weather up here. I found a job (I was hired the same day as my interview, in fact) and I put a bunch of debt on a shiny new credit card to afford the move.

I got the job thinking I was all set to write those funny quips on the company’s social media (I mean, I did have seven levels at the world famous Second City, right?) but I was told I’d have to work in support for an entire year before I would be able to move to a different department. A whole year answering calls and talking to customers just for the hope that someday I’d be able to make memes and Twitter jokes. But that’s neither here nor there. Let’s get back to the situation at hand, shall we?

So here I am, 27-years-old, balancing all sorts of debt and trying to pave a life for myself that doesn’t involve crying in the bathtub every week. Every single one of my coworkers is struggling. They’re taking side jobs, they’re living at home. One of them started a GoFundMe because she couldn’t pay her rent. She ended up leaving the company and moving east, somewhere the minimum wage could double as a living wage. Another wrote on those neat whiteboards we’ve got on every floor begging for help because he was bound to be homeless in two weeks. Fortunately, someone helped him out. At least, I think they did. I actually haven’t seen him in the past few months. Do you think he’s okay? Another guy who got hired, and ultimately let go, was undoubtedly homeless. He brought a big bag with him and stocked up on all those snacks they make sure are on every floor. 

I haven’t bought groceries since I started this job. Not because I’m lazy, but because I got this ten pound bag of rice before I moved here and my meals at home (including the one I’m having as I write this) consist, by and large, of that. Because I can’t afford to buy groceries.

Will you pay my phone bill for me? I just got a text from T-Mobile telling me my bill is due. 

Look, I’ll make you a deal. You don’t have to pay my phone bill. I’ll just disconnect my phone. And I’ll disconnect my home internet, too, even though it’s the only way I can do work for my freelance gig that I haven’t been able to do since I moved here because I’m constantly too stressed to focus on anything but going to sleep as soon as I’m not at work. 

If you could help me out, my PayPal is paypal.me/jimmyzee, my Venmo is jimmyzee (no hyphen). Square Cash is cash.me/$JimZee.

Thanks, bro.

Rogerio!!

You've been so generous in the past and I'm trying to raise money to get a plane ticket and funds for the final auditions for the 2016 season of American Idol.

I went to Disney World a few years ago and did the American Idol experience attraction at MGM. I auditioned and got on the show. They do 5 shows per day where an audience picks the winner of 3 performers. At the end of the day, they have a big show where the 5 winners compete for a Dream Ticket. 

The Dream Ticket is a pass to get to the front of the American Idol Audition Line. I performed and won the small show during the day, then won the final show at the end of the day, getting me the Dream Ticket. They don't expire and you can use them at any auditions. I thought I had lost it, but in a stroke of luck (and possibly fate), I just found it in my files at home.

This could be my last chance to do it and I can't live my life wondering,"What if?" I have this amazing opportunity and hoprfully, with your help, I can live my dream and live life to the very fullest!

Thank you for the chance!!

Hey Everyone!

As many of you know, I am a HUGE fan of ULTRA Music Festival in MIAMI. This will be my 14th year attending and marks my 2nd year moderating the Facebook group. I admittedly have put in TOO MANY hours running the group, making sure it is free from spam and trolls. It has been a lot of fun but it has also stolen a ton of my time. I am hoping that some of the friendships I've made will inspire people to be generous and help me make this trip possible.

Normally March is an abundant month for me but this year I am financially "running on fumes." I have spent the last 2.5 months recovering from a broken ankle, which has kept me from working. In this time I have used up all my reserve cash and now with my trip to Florida right around the corner my credit card bills are looming. I will use this money to pay for the flight, ticket, lodging and food for during the trip. It would be the best birthday present if I got a great response.

I will be eternally grateful to everyone who helps out and would LOVE to meet up with you and take some photos at the festival. Thank you so much for your support. <3

–Jimmy Zee

Roger –

I know why you haven’t returned any of my recent texts or direct messages. You don’t believe that I’m actually sick and I guess I don’t blame you. I can assure you, the cancer is real and I don’t have anyone else to turn to. I need $4,500 to help fund a trip to St. John where there is a shaman there who they say can pray the cancer out of me. Outside shot but I’m also told that when your prognosis is this bad, you gotta bucket list that shit, right?

I know I have no right to even ask but, in case you find it in your heart to help an old (31 years is now OLD!) college buddy out, my GoFundMe profile is linked below.

Jim

[chorusfm]

No artist has ever had a success story quite like that of Chris Stapleton. Two years ago this week, Stapleton released his debut album, a 14-track collection of old school country, blues, southern rock, and soul called Traveller. The album didn’t arrive without buzz: Stapleton was one of the most dependable songwriters in Nashville, a guy with (at the time) four number one country hits to his name. He also made his record with Dave Cobb, the producer who had helped Jason Isbell and Sturgill Simpson craft breakthrough, critically-beloved albums the two years previous. The result was a number 14 debut on the Billboard 200 with 27,000 copies sold; not remarkable, but not bad for a debut artist, either.

For the next six months, it looked like Traveller was destined to become a cult classic. Country music websites—from Rolling Stone Country to Taste of Country to Saving Country Music—unanimously called it the best record of the year at mid-year. Country radio, meanwhile, ignored it, leaving the album without much in the way of mainstream traction. But then November 4th happened, and Stapleton swept the biggest awards at the annual CMA Awards. He also shared the stage with Justin Timberlake for a thrilling two-song live performance that almost instantly went viral. The combined exposure of the award wins and the most buzzed-about televised music performance of the year gave Stapleton an unprecedented 6,000% boost in album sales. He not only re-entered the Billboard 200, but Traveller leapfrogged everything else on the market to take the top spot. No other album in the history of the Billboard 200 has ever re-entered the chart at number one.

Country radio still couldn’t be bothered to play Stapleton much after that, but it didn’t matter. A Grammy nomination for Album of the Year followed, and by February 2016, Traveller had gone platinum. Currently, the album is pushing two million copies and shows no signs of slowing down. It was the top selling country album in 2016 and one of the top-five best-selling albums in any genre. At the time of this writing, Traveller is at 33 on the Billboard 200—seven slots ahead of Adele’s record-smashing 25.

Needless to say, albums don’t arrive with much more anticipation than From A Room: Volume 1, Stapleton’s sophomore album and the first piece of a planned double album. (Volume 2 is slated for a release around Christmas.) When he released Traveller, Stapleton had the luxury of being a best-kept secret. Everyone in Nashville knew he had the songs, the chops, and the voice to be a star, but people outside of Nashville songwriting circles mostly didn’t have a clue who he was. On From A Room, Stapleton is no longer a secret on any level. Instead, he has the challenge of making a record that lives up to a surprise sales juggernaut—one that was universally beloved by pretty much everyone, country fans or otherwise. That’s not an easy position to be in.

But here’s the thing: Stapleton still has the songs. He’s still got the chops. And holy mother of god, he still has the voice. “Seen my share of broken halos/Folded wings that used to fly/They’ve all gone wherever they go/Broken halos that used to shine,” he sings at the very outset of track one, just a single acoustic guitar chord beating him to the speakers. It’s a smart move: as good as Stapleton’s band is, and as solid as his songs are, his voice is what won him those awards, set the world on fire with that Timberlake performance, and turned Traveller into a workhorse. His big, epic baritone both sounds instantly country and doesn’t sound quite like anything else in country music, past or present. Weaned on whiskey and too many weather-worn miles on a dusty highway, Stapleton’s voice has just enough grit to carry the more rock-driven numbers and just enough honey to make you feel every ounce of his regret during the somber ballads.

Both types of songs appear on From A Room: Volume 1. “Broken Halos,” the aforementioned opening track, is somewhere in between, a road-trip-ready anthem not so far removed from the title track (and album opener) from the last record. Track two doubles down on the somber, with a gorgeously aching cover of the Willie Nelson classic “Last Thing I Needed, First Thing This Morning,” while track three, “Second One to Know,” is a barnstorming scorcher with a ripping guitar solo. Just like that, three songs in, we’ve gotten a glimpse of Stapleton’s three main modes.

If From A Room: Volume 1 deserves a criticism, it’s that Stapleton doesn’t travel very far outside of his wheelhouse. After making their breakthrough records with Dave Cobb, both Jason Isbell and Sturgill Simpson fleshed out their sonic palettes and went in different directions. (Sturgill’s post-breakthrough album was especially radical, drenching everything in horns and strings, and causing some country purists to lambast him for making a record that “wasn’t actually country.”) All nine of the songs that make up the first installment of From A Room would have fit pretty comfortably on Traveller. In fact, the biggest departure is that whiskey, Stapleton’s favorite lyrical theme on the first record, doesn’t turn up once on From A Room.

Frankly, though, it’s good to hear Stapleton doubling down on the spartan classic country sound that made Traveller such a classic. At this point, Stapleton can sell out arenas and play stadiums alongside legends like Tom Petty, but you won’t hear any traces of arena country in these songs. On the contrary, most of From A Room: Volume 1 is made up of barroom country ballads, left sparse and gimmick-free thanks to Dave Cobb’s no-bullshit production. Most of the songs end up sounding like they were written for dive bars or half-empty clubs—though they will inevitably sound just fine echoing through huge arenas and amphitheaters this summer and fall.

Case-in-point is “Either Way,” a legitimately breathtaking song built from nothing other than Stapleton’s voice and a steadily picked acoustic guitar. The song isn’t new: country singer Lee Ann Womack cut it back in 2008, for a much more mainstream-sounding version. Like “Whiskey and You” from the last record (which was originally recorded by Tim McGraw), Stapleton went back through tunes he’d written and plucked “Either Way” for himself. His version ditches the mainstream trappings of Womack’s recording—the light percussion, the dramatic backing vocals, the flickers of pedal steel and fiddle—for a skeletal version that is haunting, pained, solitary, and heartbreaking. “We pass in the hall/On our way to separate rooms/The only time we ever talk/Is when the monthly bills are due,” goes the verse, describing a marriage that has faded from love to indifference. “I’m past the point of give a damn/And all my tears are cried,” Stapleton sings, and for how broken and resigned he sounds, you’d almost believe him. But then the chorus comes around, Stapleton’s voice turning from a whisper to a roar so wracked with emotion that, if it doesn’t send shivers shooting down your spine, you might not have a pulse anymore. “We can just go one like this/Say the word, we’ll call it quits/Baby you can go or you can stay/But I won’t love you either way.”

I firmly believe that Chris Stapleton is the best male vocalist making music right now, in any genre. Traveller offered ample proof of that claim, but “Either Way” makes it indisputable. It’s a song so perfect and so raw that it instantly locks you in its world, and for four minutes, you’re in the darkness of a memory, reliving the worst heartbreak of your life. The first time I heard it, I had to stop working, close my eyes, and just let myself feel the cathartic, exquisite pain of the lyrics and the voice. It’s a work of passion and storytelling that, despite its humble arrangement, begs for your complete attention. There is no better song this year, and I very much doubt there will be.

“Either Way” is probably the only song from From A Room: Volume 1 that lives up to the unimpeachable five-track run that started Traveller—still the best opening run from any album this decade. There is a reason this tune is right smack dab in the center of the album. It’s the eye of the storm, meant to trigger that same “replay side 1” impulse that “Parachute” does when you spin Traveller on wax. But From A Room is leaner and better paced, avoiding the bloat and indulgence that made the back half of Traveller something of an acquired taste. With a runtime of 32 and a half minutes, From A Room: Volume 1 is roughly half as long as its predecessor. And sure, this record isn’t actually finished yet; we’re still getting another disc. But the relatively quick running time is to Stapleton’s benefit, allowing mid-tempo groovers like “I Was Wrong” and “Without Your Love” (or menacing ballads like closer “Death Row”) to marinate in ways that comparable tracks from the last record—“Was It 26,” “The Devil Named Music,” “Outlaw State of Mind”—struggled to do for some listeners. Even “Them Stems”—a lightweight 12-bar blues about being in such a bad way that you smoke the very dregs of your weed stash—feels like it has a place here.

In the future, I’d certainly be interested in hearing something more “out there” and experimental from Chris Stapleton. From A Room is not so much a progression from Traveller as it is a refinement. But it’s also very far from being a sophomore slump. With a voice like the one he’s got, Stapleton could easily cut some pretty shoddy material and still make it sound like heaven. Instead, From A Room is a record filled with extremely well-written songs—about lost souls, broken hearts, and at least one outlaw living on borrowed time—performed by a guy who is completely sure of the artist he wants to be. Bring on Volume 2.

Please consider supporting us so we can keep bringing you stories like this one.

◎