#tazer kaner

[hotwhatstheplay]

Finally took the time to try to figure out the last time Kane and Toews were on the ice together. It was this game, possibly this goal. January 28th 2023. My heart 💔

[chanelfunnell]

Yes tthe end of one era. Not traded yet but they finish this season in Blackhawks jerseys.

The Blackhawks are able to win.. Interesting. With sell out, backyard, office sale.

[hawks4life]

This classic photo

[kenziekugler22]

#Repost @nhlblackhawks with @use.repost

・・・

1,000 games together.

Take a look what that breaks down to in numbers 📊

[formula-swift]

My first tumblr name was rockmelikeahurrikane

I created that after I got into hockey ‘accidentally’ and discovered Patrick Kane and the Blackhawks in 2010.

I haven’t thought about this until I read a birthday post for Patrick.

Happy birthday, Kaner!

[dixie12]

same, blackhawks, same

[1988pucks]

My headcanon for why Sharpy went to work for the Flyers is, that he only stayed in the broadcast booth for Kaner and Tazer. Now that his boys are gone he doesn't have a reason to stay anymore either.

[cgsf]

Men's Hockey (RPF) fanfiction recs:

Patrick Kane/Jonathan Toews [Part 2]

"I'm beyond your peripheral vision (so you might want to turn your head)" 🔒 (E) by anonymous | 3,418 | It takes the combination of prospect camp, training camp, and their first week on the road together for Johnny to realize Patrick is his soulmate. The first person he calls is Dan.

"red lips, so kissable" 🔒 (E) by anonymous | 3,569 | When Pat had finally come to him with this after six months of dating without things imploding, he'd been hesitant. "I just.... I think about making myself pretty sometimes," he had said, blushing. "Like a girl."

"crash into me" (E) by fadeastride | 3,403 | And that’s not some chick. That’s fucking Pat.

"Make The Moves Up As I Go" 🔒 (E) by agirlnamedfia | 30,354 | Patrick has his first Econ 202 class on the second day of the spring semester. It doesn’t exactly go well.

"Sommeil" (M) by MJBadger | 1,622 | Jonny being weird about public bathrooms and lots of sleepiness.

"let it all unfurl" 🔒 (M) by poeelektra | 2,545 | "Brooklyn is not Bumfuck, Tazer. And, you know, irony noted, seeing as you're from Winnipeg." "Whatever," Jon says darkly, punching fists into his jacket pockets like there’s some satisfaction to be had in stressing the seams of their linings. He doesn't care where Brooklyn is—if it belongs to this city, he's already made up his mind about it. "You're paying for the cab ride. There and back." Sharpy just laughs like Jon has told a good joke. "Sure thing, Tazer."

"and it's over, and i'm goin' under" (E) by mockturtletale | 15,011 | And that’s the story of how Kaner finds himself slumping down to the floor against his best friend’s front door, shaking a little and half covered in goosebumps. Sporting a semi and fighting the urge to cry.

"kiss and tell" 🔒 (T) by sloom | 2,169 | “Trust me,” Sharpy says, “this will be good for you.” And then, he shoves Jonny into what appears to be a mostly empty coat closet and slams the door shut behind him. “What the fuck, Sharp!” Jonny calls, pounding at the door which is, of course, locked. “Enjoy your seven minutes in heaven, Tazer,” Sharpy singsongs. Then, the bare bulb mounted on the ceiling flares to life, illuminating one Patrick Kane. Fuck.

"i don't play hard to get (i play to get you hard)" 🔒 (E) by sloom | 4,666 | Jonny starts out in twink porn - of course he does, he’s nineteen, all big dark eyes and delicate features. He never planned on being a porn star, it just sort of happened. He got injured and lost his hockey scholarship and, well, everyone has their story about how they got into porn. Jonny needed the money. Simple as that.

"left standing in the wilderness downtown" 🔒 (M) by poeelektra | 4,051 | They’re friends, though that’s always felt like a watered-down word for what they are, teammates and halves of a whole and things that are too big for language. Jonny’s his person, is all.

"anxious like the ocean in a storm" 🔒 (M) by poeelektra | 4,169 | “Did you know Savvy and Larmer combined for 220 pts in ’87-’88? Last week I watched them pummel the North Stars, a 6-point night for Savvy, with a hat trick.” He leaves off how his eyes were glued to the screen watching the two of them, because Jonny has no poetry in his soul. It just made Patrick wonder—about their futures, if what everyone’s saying is true, what it’ll be like to go all the way like he thinks him and Jonny can do—and the wondering gave him goosebumps.

"Okay, So Now You're a Vegetarian" 🔒 (M) by anonymous | 33,854 | Patrick Kane secretly decides to go vegetarian. Jonathan Toews draws the wrong conclusions.

"Good Times Never Seemed So Good" (E) by juliusschmidt | 21,171 | Johnny is a miserable bastard. Kaner is a needy fuck. They are meant for each other and also for summer on Mackinac Island, fratbro paradise.

"Media Vita In Morte Sumus" 🔒 (T) by jezziejay | 2,556 | Life is standing on the observation deck of the surgical theatre when Death finds him. “Nobody called for the grim reaper,” Jon says without turning around. There’s a soft snicker from behind him. “I’m omnipresent, I don’t need to be called.”

"I Could Dream of Ways to See You, I Could Close My Eyes to Dream" (M) by Frosting50 | 2,686 | Jonny’s head falls back against the metal stall divider with a resounding thud. He keeps making these small punched out grunts, even as he bites his lips in an effort to keep quiet. He has zero desire to get caught by some homophobic Jets fan while he’s getting his dick sucked in the men’s room at the MTS Centre, but -- Jesus Christ -- this kid has a mouth on him.

"Go, Johnny, Go" (E) by juliusschmidt | 4,387 | Jonny gives Kaner a ticket. To the courthouse. Kaner gives Jonny a ticket. To the love shack hockey game.

"don't look up, down, or to the side" 🔒 (M) by hazel | 8,282 | His mom had told him not to fall in love with houses; so had his dad, made some crack about them being worse than women, son, while his mom fake-punched him in the arm and then added, "and like people, it's what's underneath that matters, Johnny." But this is the first house he's looked at that he's liked, though he doesn't know why: it's got narrow, pointy windows with stone pieces on the tops like eyebrows, and it sits between its larger, tidier, neighbours like a poor cousin. Johnny thinks it maybe just needs someone to love it; and then he thinks: fuck.

"Let It Be" (E) by juliusschmidt | 60,127 | There’s one person who knows more about Pat than Brisson, one person who’s closer to discovering Pat’s secrets than his mom, one person who always, always, calls bullshit on him: Jonathan Fucking Toews. And following the launch of the Sun-Times article, which runs with the unfortunate headline “Patrick Kane Admits He’s Not God,” Jonny does not disappoint.

"Power Balance" (E) by thisissirius | 13,476 | The body of the email just says, “don’t fuck seguin” because Jonny doesn’t know what capital letters are and he’s a controlling asshole even when he’s miles away, and attached to it is a spreadsheet that Patrick reluctantly opens. It’s color-coded with tabs and he’s not sure whether he wants to punch Jonny in the mouth or laugh in his face. Calling him in the middle of the airport is a really bad fucking idea and Patrick knows something about those, so he settles for sending Jonny a message. YOU SENT ME A JERK-OFF SCHEDULE FOR SWITZERLAND?!

"break me in" (E) by thundersquall | 5,386 | Today Patrick comes into the locker room, shrugs off his coat, and underneath he's wearing a fucking tight tee that clings to every dip and curve of his musculature. It looks fucking painted on, and the sight of it slams Jonathan like a puck to his face, stunning and somehow primal and just bordering on the edge of obscene, how good Patrick looks in that.

"the high road is hard to find" (M) by anonymous | 11,304 | Patrick guesses this is his “third strike, you’re out” in the Jonathan Toews friendship book and he doesn’t know how to remedy that. He doesn't think he deserves the chance, to be honest.

"you look so perfect" 🔒 (E) by tarcanza | 4,270 | His eyes land on Jonny, and his rage chokes in his throat. Dries right up and flips on a dime like a fucking chemical reaction. Jonny’s lying on his stomach in the middle of his bed, reading a book. He’s in nothing but those stupid, tiny black boxer-briefs, stretched tight over the swell of his ass. One side’s jacked, fabric pushed up so that his cheek’s just hanging out all casual, fucking taunting Patrick.

"easy does it" (E) by robokittens | 2,137 | Jonny tips his head forward, rests it against Patrick's shoulder. "You got this, baby," he whispers. "You can take this; you were made for it. Made for me." It doesn't even feel like dirty talk, just like the truth.

"The Scars That Words Have Carved" 🔒 (E) by Linsky | 15,694 | “Forgive me for asking, Peeks,” Sharpy says, slowly. “But did you just kiss our illustrious captain, here?” “Um.” Patrick’s not sure what this captain business is about, but: “Yes?” Jonny’s still staring at him like he’s grown four or five extra heads, and, okay. Patrick definitely read this wrong.

"Wide Eyes" (E) by Tedda | 44,832 | When he starts hooking up with Patrick, Jonny slowly begins to realize a few things about himself.

"a hot summer night" (E) by Tedda | 5,267 | Patrick arrives in Arizona on a hot summer night. He hasn't talked to Jonny in five years, and it would have felt weird to do it over the phone for the first time.

"Dress Well, Test Well" 🔒 (M) by Kerfluffle | 9,649 | A liberal arts college AU.

"Streets of Chicago" 🔒 (E) by TheNorthRemembers | 79,749 | Patrick is 29 years old when he finds out he is HIV positive. Patrick is 29 years old when he realizes that despite giving up everything for hockey, he still might lose it over one stupid mistake, one careless, reckless night.

"a hot summer night" (E) by Tedda | 5,267 | Patrick arrives in Arizona on a hot summer night. He hasn't talked to Jonny in five years, and it would have felt weird to do it over the phone for the first time.

"blue eyes, velvet lips" (E) by Tedda | 10,356 | Prince Jonathan finds a runaway slave. Clearly, the only solution is taking the boy home.

"Wide Eyes" (E) by Tedda | 44,832 | When he starts hooking up with Patrick, Jonny slowly begins to realize a few things about himself.

"The Scars That Words Have Carved" 🔒 (E) by Linsky | 15,694 | “Forgive me for asking, Peeks,” Sharpy says, slowly. “But did you just kiss our illustrious captain, here?” “Um.” Patrick’s not sure what this captain business is about, but: “Yes?” Jonny’s still staring at him like he’s grown four or five extra heads, and, okay. Patrick definitely read this wrong.

"It Must Be Something in the Water" 🔒 (E) by allthebros | 40,228 | After five years away, living on the west coast, coming to terms with his sexuality, Patrick comes back to his coastal hometown to be with his family again and to start working at his dad's dealership, determined to get his life back on track, to leave behind all emotional messes and complications. But on the first morning of his return he meets Jonny, his sister's new boyfriend, and falls hard in lust with him, throwing an enormous wrench in his plan.

"Sleepless in Chicago" 🔒 (E) by sahiya | 4,894 | “Babe,” Jonny said, “how long has it been since you slept?” “Three nights,” Patrick said.

"Muscle Stim" 🔒 (E) by sahiya | 7,672 | The last thing Patrick needed was a stupid crush on the dude whose job it was to get him back out on the ice as quickly as possible.

"Didn't Know That Was a Thing" 🔒 (T) by AnythingThrice | 1,303 | Patrick notices it as he's searching the shelves in Jonny's bedroom for Madden 08: a weird glass sculpture, glossy black with bands of a trippy, swirling white pattern that seem to sit just under the surface. He figures it for a knickknack at first, some art piece his decorator suggested or—more likely—one of those locally-and-sustainably crafted souvenirs Jonny tends to bring back from his vacations.

"Not Something You Rub in (Just) Anyone's Face" 🔒 (E) by AnythingThrice | 6,736 | "Don’t wanna talk about it," Patrick cuts in, voice firmer now. As far as he's concerned they'd done all the necessary talking back in April. Offseason rules – offseason lives – set and followed and fucking done. World Cup over. Summer gone. Long past time to get back to the good stuff: friendly ice, Blackhawks hockey and being first star in Jonny's eyes.

"Shitshow" 🔒 (E) by AnythingThrice | 19,989 | Jonathan thought they'd outgrown this. Or no, if he's being honest with himself, he thought Pat had outgrown it while he'd merely shoved it aside, banished it to the realm of things it didn't help to dwell on.

"Fill Up Your Mouth with Something Sweet" 🔒 (E) by Linsky | 3,904 | The amazing thing, Jonny reflects after a couple of months with the Blackhawks, is how Patrick Kane manages to be such a good hockey player and yet so wrong about everything.

"the whole of him" 🔒 (E) by allthebros | 2,258 | Patrick did nothing else for this moment but live with inconvenient erections since they talked about doing it, only showing up at Jonny’s door in sweats and a t-shirt and his morning-long semi he’d made sure to trap in the kind of tight underwear that would make Jonny proud. Well fine, Patrick also did some video research. Watching review tapes is important. But Jonny--fucking Jonathan Toews--he got ready for this.

"What It Means" 🔒 (T) by allthebros | 1,312 | They’ve never been like this with each other before. He doesn’t know if it’s the sun, being away from Chicago and their lives, or just them finally being able to have this, but it catches inside Jonny’s chest. Little swoops in his stomach that surprise him every time, make it hard to breathe.

"Tell the Stars I'm Coming Home" 🔒 (E) by allthebros | 15k WIP | Jonny and Patrick have three weeks left to live. Three weeks to find their way back to each other.

"La Piscine" 🔒 (E) by allthebros | 2,484 | Pat didn’t think it was possible, but if anything, Jonathan Toews has gotten hotter since Pat saw him last summer. It’s kind of a bummer that they don’t go to the same college, but Pat appreciates the surprise. He doesn’t know what’s in the water up there in Montreal, but God Bless Canada.

"S(t)ick" 🔒 (E) by allthebros | 2,842 | “What’s gotten into you, man,” Jonny says, softly. The ‘you’ is on Patrick's lips before he can realize he’s thought it, hysterical laugh bubbling into his throat at the cheesiness of it, the disgusting idiocy, but instead he says, “it’s this heat, man, I can’t—” Think. Sleep. Fucking drink a beer like normal. Look at Jonny and see what he used to see.

"Shawty With You" 🔒 (E) by allthebros | 6,764 | 5 times Pat and Jonny needed mistletoe to kiss, and one time they didn't.

"134 Days" 🔒 (E) by allthebros | 3,406 | It's been a long winter without him.

"Nothin' But Blue Skies" 🔒 (T) by allthebros | 2,708 | Perhaps the middle of Wisconsin wasn't the right place to tell Jonny.

"Sonoran" 🔒 (T) by allthebros | 2,177 | Somewhat newly retired, Patrick makes his way to Arizona where Jonny's ostensibly getting his own shit together. It's summer in the desert, and it's been too long since they've seen each other.

"Just to Break My Own Fall" 🔒 (M) by Linsky | 9,092 | Patrick used to play a game with himself, when he was younger and considerably dumber: see how close he could get to Jonny, for how long, and not do anything to give himself away.

"trouble when you walked in" (T) by tourdefierce | 2,253 | The only thing more confusing than Twitter is Patrick Kane. Thankfully, Pat keeps Jonny busy enough that the former doesn't even matter.

"farmer au" (E) by anonymous | 13,940 | “No offense, man, but who steals a bunch of corn? It’s not really in short supply around here?” “It’s or-gan-ic,” Jonny says, pointedly drawing out each syllable. Deputy Kane clearly doesn’t fucking get it. His corn is probably full of pesticides and fertilizers.

"Loosen Up My Buttons (Babe)" (E) by tourdefierce | 4,848 | Tazer is always pushing him to be better—little psycho that he is—so it doesn't surprise Pat when he finds himself looking at a too tense, wound up Jonny and saying to himself, "Someone needs to fuck that douchebag silly". And then obviously high-fiving himself because heyoh, that's totally his job.

"High and Tight" (E) by tourdefierce | 2,609 | Jonny Toews gets a hair cut.

"the quiet between us" 🔒 (M) by tarcanza | 13,852 | There are screams. Thousands of them. Thousands of people. Claps, chants, cheers of victory. It should be loud. But it’s not. Here with his face hidden in the curve of Kaner’s neck, it’s not. There’s only Kaner. And Jonny wrapped around him, never letting go.

"(All My Life I've Been) Burdened by the Dreams" 🔒 (E) by Linsky | 30,170 | Patrick has two goals for himself when he comes to Chicago: Win the Stanley Cup. And don’t let anyone find out he’s a wolf.

••••••

This list is ongoing.

[readingbythestreetlights]

hockey and thoughts

once and a while i just sit here and think about how much i miss fleury on the penguins, and how draisaitl probably misses tkachuk when they play the flames while my boy matthew is thriving in florida, and how kane and toews are gonna split apart any day now and i want toews to be the captain forever, and how stromer and davo don’t talk but dylan pretty much had a revenge night for connor’s 500th game, and how the 2015 draft class exists and i always manage to forget sebastian aho was a part of it, and how mathew barzal will always be my one and only because i claimed him oh so long ago and even though there are players i like better there’s something nostalgic that wells up in me when i think of him.

i want sidney crosby to never go because he has been my hockey role model for as long as i can remember, and i want geno, tanger, and him to stay on the pens with access to some special fountain of youth potion.

i think about how mcdavid hasn’t gotten a cup yet and that probably isn’t right, but it preserves crosby’s domination for just a little while, and i think about how sid and ovi have been a handful of career points apart this whole season, and both are nearing 1,500 total and that’s so amazing i adore them.

i don’t really want crosby, malkin, stamkos, ovechkin, tavares, kane, toews, and others to go just yet, but shea weber recently retired and carey price is dunzo but i love him, and i want the flyers to succeed and do at least somewhat good because a good ol’ pennsylvania guns-blazing matchup is all i need before crosby retires.

i tend to think about giroux going to the panthers to win a cup, only to be handed off like he isn’t one of the greatest talents/vets in the league.

i really, really miss him on the flyers, and somehow i’m supposed to deal with nolan patrick having left, too? but hartsy (cahtah haht) is still here and t.k. and haysey, so we’re all good.

because philly finally has a good goalie and i love him and man i love jarry but he’s just not able to stay healthy and i hate him for it.

i want to see pasta succeed even more, and i really don’t mind mcavoy and i’ve got a lot of respect for bergeron, but i really hate the bruins and marchand but one day i’ll miss him i’m certain.

clayton keller is a god among men and he’s adorable, much like sasha barkov.

for some reason i’ve got a soft spot for ghost bear.

clayton keller is wonderful and nick suzuki, cole caulfied, and all the young dallas guys are too!

there’s a bright future ahead for those kids.

kaner scored a hatty against the leafs tonight. the hawks won.

and lastly, i really, really recommend and love watching the one roundtable interview of lundqvist, crosby, and tazer. 

[kazer-time]

Kaner to Tazer for their 300th goal 🥹

Hawks vs. CBJ, 12.23.22.

[saucerfulofsins]

1988 // and all that we can be and not who we are 10k // mature // hurt/comfort, character study, canon compliant

Kaner doesn't expect to wake up to Tazer in his hospital room. He quickly realizes they might not both with the Hawks, but they're definitely still playing for the same team. HINT HINT, NUDGE NUDGE.

[hotwhatstheplay]

Some 1988 from the Athletic today concerning Patrick Kane's return to the United Center ❤️

[taz19hagel38]

Kaner talking about soon playing 1000 games with tazer

[hockeychatstea]

https://www.tumblr.com/hockeychatstea/757924101185732608/are-there-no-decent-players-in-this-league-are

I think at the start of their career most of them behave like boys (sorry 18-25 is still a boy) with lots of money, a small amount of fame, and little to no supervision. So yeah these guys who are at best mid range in looks and not the brightest stars in the firmament suddenly have their choice of community pussy at the bars and parties and become community dick.

I do think a good portion calm down around their late 20s to early 30s and realize that community pussy and community dick is just kinda gross after a while and maybe not being a hoe and having stability is nice too.

Do I think McDrai will slow down anytime soon? lol no. Nor will Dunn or Svech or Matthews or Marner or Sway or the Brothers Hughes.

But your less bigger name players and some of the older ones like Sid, Geno, Kris, Kaner, Tazer? Yeah I do think most of them have settled their asses down and become respectable men. As respectable as they can be at least.

.

[tazertime]

I find it interesting Tazer and Kaner haven’t publicly acknowledged the passing of Rocky yet. Lots of the past and current players already have. I’m sure they will but seems quite delayed

Neither of them are big social media guys. I'm sure they privately sent the appropriate condolences to people. The idea of having to publicly perform emotion and relationships in that way is honestly something so fucked about current social media culture, though I'm also guilty of checking up on responses in my Kpop fandom circle.

I never post on insta or Twitter so the idea that someone would be discussing the fact that I didn't comment on the post my friend made about her dad dying even though I called her and sent a care package is wild. But at the same time: public figure, should have a PR person, etc.

Idk anon, apparently you sparked a think piece

[chanelfunnell]

Blackhawks won, Patrick Kane scored

Big jjoy, Kaner looks like Captain Serious musing his buddy Tazer and both ranking their trading chases. Kaner has had a din din and heart to heart with Brinksy and it has lifted his spirit and his Puck under the lid of the net.

Max Domi son and papa Kaner

Big joy. Friends on the ice.