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#tbf it's spread out over 3 weeks BUT STILL
stargirl230 · 3 months
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thanks for the light
I was just trying to figure out how procreate works but then the op brainworms got to me and 35 hours later here we are! can you tell I miss home-cooked meals :')
(no reposts; reblogs appreciated)
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pinkslashersimp · 2 years
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What do you think yandare Hannibal would do if reader snuck out the window and went into the woods just to chill by the lake/creek and find shiny rocks
I LOVE YOUR WRITING IEHHHEBEBFIDKDKE
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THANK UUUU😭💗💗💗
i see you’ve asked for nbc hannibal in ur other message so i’ll do just him<3 thank u for specifying:)
TW: yandere behavior, toxic relationship, false imprisonment, reader is GN, implied kidnapping, barely proof read tbf
if any of this triggers u pls scroll past and stay safe🤍
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NBC Hannibal x His GN!Reader who sneaks out🌷💗
Haha. You’re bold if you think you can make it out for over an hour at best.
Ever since Hannibal took you, both the front and back door have had multiple locks installed, which are checked by him every morning, noon, before he goes to work, and night before you both go to bed.
Even the windows have been sealed shut and there are cameras in each corner of the house. Face it, you’re stuck like a mouse in a trap.
Especially since you now know of his eating habits
Still, somehow you’ve managed to jimmy open a window after weeks of slyly breaking apart the sealing on it (you sneaky fuck), and successfully snuck out at night making minimal noise, avoiding waking Hannibal in his slumber.
Still, somehow you’ve managed to jimmy open a window after weeks of slyly breaking apart the sealing on it (you sneaky fuck), and successfully snuck out at night making minimal noise, avoiding waking Hannibal in his slumber.
You’re given an hour head start this time, since Hannibal is sound asleep and you didn’t knock anything over when half hazardously jumping out the house
When he wakes up, though?
Oh, hes pissed.
Angry, worried, confused. All these emotions stir around inside him as he checks the cameras in hopes you’ve simply left bed momentarily for a glass of water or something.
Which is when he spies the open window. And the timeframe of you leaving.
An entire hour ago.
He sighs heavily, rubbing the bridge of his nose out of stress. Disappointment for both you and himself circling around him
Hannibal doesn’t waste any time getting changed, instead heading in the direction you left in, in his sleepwear and black dressing gown
Meanwhile, you’ve already seated yourself on a bench facing a peaceful, serene lake, which spreads greatly throughout a large portion of the area, lit brightly by the moon which sits comfortably above the distant edge of the water
Life is great
Life is peaceful
Life is quiet and stress free, away from Hannibal’s animalistic, obsessive clutches.
Until he finds you. 15 minutes later. The crunch of leaves under his feet startles you away from your tranquil meditation session, turning to face him with a look of horror
Your apologies and please go straight through him, ignoring your explanation for whatever the Hell you thought you were pulling tonight by leaving like that.
Hannibal grabs your arm and lifts you straight up, putting you in front of him and firmly pushing you back in the direction of the house
“Back home. Now.”
The minute you’re inside his home again he sits you down and lectures you for what feels like hours. Expressing his anger, disappointment, and worry, in the most collected way he’s able to given his current emotions
And congratulations! Unfortunately this little stunt has stripped you of all freedom entirely, almost every second of the day is spent besides Hannibal (apart from when he has to leave for work, then it’s spent locked in a single room)
Let’s hope that hour and 15 minutes were worth it
(at least you got to keep the little rocks)
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galene-gothic · 3 months
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- PAID READING FEEDBACK -
Hi Galene, don’t trust when I say I'll send feedback in a few days🤣 that's like code for a few weeks ahahah. But it did give time for me to properly read the reading and take everything on board. You were so spot on when you said I feel apathetic ahh, for ages, like last week I went to do some shopping and I swear I wasn't even there mentally I just felt so withdrawn, I've sometimes even had people say that I'm daydreaming when I'm not paying attention to a conversation happening, I'm too tired to be concerned 😅💀. I just wish for time alone tbh cause I'm so fed up. think it's because I've got so many exams, coursework/responsibility I just feel so overwhelmed, especially with the amount of fallouts with friends it's just too much and I'm exhausted. When you said i would fall Ill to overworking I actually passed out in one of my clinicals and had the worst flu ever, my lecturers/ nurses had to take blood pressure it was chaotic, and anytime I went to my hospital clinicals I've had the worst nosebleeds. What the heck are you sure youre not the one spying on me, you were so accurate!! But I feel almost relieved that my hardwork won't go to waste one way or another. I can think of a few off the top of my head who would be bitter and try to pick dirt off me, they're the same who would spread gossip/rumours about god knows what. I trusted people too much for definite. I didn't think I was that interesting to spy on tbf🤣 although I unfriended the ones who were nasty to me and I think that pissed them off because they unadded me on insta soon after. The only way they'd know I unadded them was if they were watching my account everyday lmaoo. I haven't seen these girls in like 3 years. I'm trying to do better and get a better sleeping routine to help with the stress and my mental health over all. But I'd be tossing and turning thinking about everything. "Everything happened for a reason" is so reassuring and I feel it's helping me grow into a more discerning and smarter person. The bitchiness is too real haha, my life is literally the movie Mean Girls on steroids. I feel like I have to be so strategic and careful about what I say incase I give them ammo to talk about me. Peace is all I want atp but the big mouths follow me anyway, I will protect my peace by being deceptive ;). And the logical hard lad you described is basically my dad🤣 he's a tough guy and wouldn't be pushed about but he'd still care about others and has always been there for me. I sometimes feel like that's why I talk so sharply because he has a level of influence on me. It's also him who encouraged me to do my nursing. My warrior spirit would come from him, as he taught me never to give up! I thought though what you said about everyone being basically strangers was what I needed to hear exactly. Like I shouldn't let these girls put me under anymore pressure than what I already am under. I've learnt a lot of lessons after all of this and will carry this forward. I'm laughing at being told to save money, all my money goes to fuel to my car🤣 but power and status sounds so worth it. I'm so looking forward for this cycle to end and to be able to breath again lolll. And your insta quote is so true it's every man for himself. I really appreciate the amount of detail you put into the reading in such a short period of time. You've done so much research as well with the laws of power and giving me a specific quote for my situation. I will do as best as I can for myself and give myself a rest so I don't burnout.
Thank you so much, I hope to talk again soon!!
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purplesurveys · 6 months
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1765
Have your parents ever tried to control your relationship?  No, the one time I was in a relationship I hid it from them and they're not the type to meddle too much so it was never brought up.
Have you ever had to give someone directions before?  I've been approached before, but I have the worst sense of direction and don't trust myself to guide them, so I usually redirect them to just use Waze. Which tbf why won't they use Waze anyway? Hkdhfkjsfhskhahaha it has such a good handle of even the most obscure roads and streets at this point.
Speaking of which, are you good at understanding driving directions? Like, signs and banners on the road? Not at all. I easily forget them. I need to have Waze on every time I drive; I use it even when I perfectly memorize where I'm going.
How many people do you text daily?  Outside of work, anywhere between 5-10. I don't converse with people often and keep it to family and best friends.
Do you have an iPod or an MP3 player? Which brand?  Not anymore, but I have a subscription on Spotify.
What was your favorite television show as a child?  I loved Spongebob, Fairly Oddparents, The Suite Life of Zack and Cody, and Drake and Josh. Oh and I also liked My Life as a Teenage Robot, which I'm pointing out in particular because I knew absolutely no one else who was into the show. :(
Do you play any instruments? Which instruments do you play?  I can't play any of them.
Is there anyone who you call by their last name?  Nah, I was never one of those people who everyone called by their surname.
What did you do on your last birthday?  Yoongi's album and documentary came out that day, so I planned out a gathering with my closest friends that revolved around the two. We listened to the album; watched the documentary when it came out at like, 8 PM or 9 PM I think? on Disney+;and I also prepared dinner spread for them.
It was also a holiday that day so there wasn't much we could've done outside, which was partly why my birthday was spent at home.
Which of the Seven Deadly Sins do you commit the most?  Gluttony, and I'm terrible with it. I order food too frequently and I also get too much every time, to the point that I rarely actually finish it all and usually have to throw the rest out.
Has anyone ever told you that you're incapable of whispering?  No. I think I'm pretty good at whispering.
What is your least favorite subject in school?  Chemistry.
Have you ever been involved in a custody battle before?  Nope.
Do you know a couple who constantly sucks on each other's face?  I don't.
Who was the best kisser you've ever dated?  I've only dated and kissed one person. Ever since them, I've never been quite interested in relationships the same way anymore.
When was the last time you watched a YouTube video?  Last night. It's 3 PM and I haven't been on YouTube at all today, I just realized.
Have you ever babysat a newborn baby before?  Not really babysit, more like watch over while the elders were running errands and chores. I always had an older relative with me.
How many times a week do you usually see the person you love?  I don't love anyone.
When was the last time you held someone's hand?  Sometime last month, I'm guessing.
How many meals have you eaten today, so far?  I'm currently having a Hot Pocket and this is my first 'meal' of the day so far, if that even counts as one.
Do you think it's stupid for people to call others "hot?"  Well, no?
Do you personally think Wikipedia is a reliable source?  I get why it wouldn't be considered a reliable source on its own, but the pages are also strictly moderated with credible references. It's definitely not as sketchy as teachers tend to make it out to be, especially when I was still studying.
Are you someone who listens to more girl or guy bands?  Ones with guys.
Have you ever shopped at Wet Seal before? Did you like it?  I don't even know what that shop is.
Do you care about spending money if it's someone else's money?  Of course.
What is your favorite Disney movie of all time?  Toy Story.
When you were a child, did you ever want to become a wizard/witch?  No.
What are the color of your walls? Do you want to repaint?  White. I just repainted my walls at the end of last year.
Would you rather have hardwood floors or carpet?  Hardwood. The idea of carpet flooring is very foreign to me, and I've never seen a house with so much...carpet on it haha.
Do you have any siblings you neglect you?  I don't know what this is trying to ask but if anything I'm not on speaking terms with my brother.
Who would you say is the most selfish person you know?  I can't think of anyone I know who fits this.
Who was the last person you yelled at? Why?  Not a person, but I had to tell off Agi for smelling and getting his mouth way too close to Cooper's shit LOL
As a kid, did you ever go to camp?  I've never been.
What were the last three movies you watched in theaters?  BTS Yet to Come in Busan, fucking Knives Out lmao, and idk...Portrait of a Lady on Fire I think? I never go to the movie theatres as I stopped being interested in movies a long time ago.
There's an upcoming local film festival that will be screening a remastered version of A Clockwork Orange, though...so I might be returning to the cinema sooner than I think.
Have you ever made out in a movie theater before?  I've never done that. When I go to a theatre, it's always to watch something hahaha.
Are you currently trying to learn to play any instrument?  Nah.
Do you believe in ghosts, spirits or demons?  Nope.
When was the last time you went somewhere you thought was haunted?  Not sure, I don't encounter eerie places too often.
What is your favorite breakfast meal?  Garlic rice, sunny side up eggs, and slightly burnt hotdogs – better if with chili garlic oil. Filipino breakfasts are the best :)
What does the lead singer of your favorite band look like?  She is petite, with pretty eyes and hair that's always a different color every time you see her.
Who was the last person to compliment you?  Two weeks ago.
How old were you when you got to go on your first date?  I was 16, if I remember correctly.
Would you call your parents over-protective or under-protective?  They used to be strict and overprotective, especially my mom. While I still live with them, they've definitely loosened up the older I got.
Did your parents ever let you play in the pits of those multicolored balls?  Yeah, every chance I got.
What is the best movie you've seen in the last five years?  Portrait of a Lady on Fire.
Has anyone ever called you a good kisser before?  Sure.
Have any of your siblings ever had a crush on your significant other?  I don't think so.
Are you the jealous type?  Before. Not really the same now as I just mind my own business these days.
Does life ever seem overly ironic to you?  It can be.
When was the last time you felt like you were high on life?  Being in Thailand with friends last June.
Do you know someone who cares about themselves more than their child? I know someone who seems that way, but then again social media can only show you so much.
Do you still watch cartoons on television?  I'll get in the mood to watch old episodes of Spongebob for the nostalgia high but it doesn't happen often.
What do you usually order at Taco Bell, if you go there?  Idk, some burrito. I've never memorized their menu because we have very few stores where I live.
Is there anyone currently annoying you?  Yeah everything about work this past week has been pissing me off but I'm not about to get into that. I want to enjoy my weekend...
What's your favorite hairstyle you've had so far?  My shoulder-length purple hair from last year.
Do you have freckles?  I don't.
How many dogs do you have, if any at all? Two.
Have you ever witnessed someone being beaten up?  Yes. It is my least favorite memory that I have to live with.
Do you think biting is weird or sexy? Idk, depends on the situation I guess? Can work both ways.
Would you rather be called hot or beautiful?  Beautiful.
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lavienjin · 3 years
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oooo!!! and!!! one jeon jungkook + bdsm(?) like tying up(?) cuffs(?) restrictive measures??? idk what its called
i don't know what came over me but this is way longer than intended (1.3k). tbf, i was picturing jungkook with those damn pink handcuffs. thanks for requesting rosie!! hope you enjoyed it <3
warnings: dom/sub themes, oral (f. receiving), bondage (handcuffs), aftercare, some sweet, sweet tooth rotting fluff.
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“Hello? Earth to ____?” Jungkook groans, snapping his finger in front of your face to get your attention. “What’s going on in that head of yours, princess?”
“Handcuffs,” you blurt out without thinking, body still buzzing after your earlier orgasm. Your eyes widen in surprise, horrified that you just said that out loud. Snapping your eyes at Jungkook, you find his eyebrows knit on the centre of his forehead, blinking rapidly at you in equal confusion. He tilts his chin, tongue darting out to wet his lips before sauntering back into the room to sit on the edge of the bed.
“Handcuffs,” he parrots, raising his pierced eyebrow to the sky and you gulp when you see a shadow pass over his face, turning his eyes darker. “It’s 10 in the goddamn morning and you’re thinking of handcuffs.”
Your mind makes random error noises and you swear you could see a pop up window next to his figure with the words, “Do you wish the ground to swallow you whole?” and no matter how hard you click the “Yes” button, nothing happens.
“Yes… wait – no! I wasn’t thinking – I mean,” you stutter, the heat in the room is palpable as you feel your hands sweat.
Jungkook grins, dimples flashing your way and with a confidence you didn’t know he had, he winks, voice an octave lower when he murmurs, “I can have that arranged.”
---
You’re giddy when you arrive at his apartment later in the week, butterflies threatening to spill all over the linoleum floor as you try not to skip as you enter the elevator. It feels like it’s been forever since you’re able to come over and the fact that you finally have the weekend off from work, you’re ready to have mindblowing sex with the man that lives in room 422.
“Come in,” he greets you cheerily, offering you a glass of water and a kiss on the cheek upon entry. It’s a habit that you two have developed over your countless… arrangements and one you appreciate greatly, knowing that it’s all for your own safety.
The first thing you spy after taking off your shoes is a box on the coffee table, discreetly black with a silver bow on the lid. “What’s that?” you ask, sipping from the cup as you turn towards Jungkook with a tilt of your chin.
“Consider it an early Christmas present.”
“Jungkook.”
“Hm?”
“It’s fucking August.”
“Like I said, early Christmas present,” he snickers, hands coming to wrap around your waist. Jungkook sways as he hums, waiting for you to finish your drink before taking the empty cup from your hand.
“Can I open it?”
“Please – feel free. It’s for you.”
Your attempt to walk like a dignified woman falters just a little at his words. Sure, he’s spoiled you with little gifts here and there, but it still gives you that thrill of happiness that warms your chest. Giggling quietly to yourself, you sit on the couch and bring the box to your lap. You lift up the lid to find black tissue paper… and a pair of pink heart handcuffs resting on top of them.
Huh?
“Are you sure these are for me?” you call out, eyes still focused on the toy.
You hear him laugh from behind you, his warm hand sliding down your back as he sits on the arm of the couch. “Don’t you remember?” he whispers, kissing the top of your head. “You told me you were thinking about handcuffs.”
Your eyebrows knit on the centre of your forehead, nose scrunching up as you try to remem—oh god. The memories come crashing back and you groan in embarrassment, putting your head in your hands. That morning, after Jungkook wakes you up with the best orgasm of your life, you were so dazed that your mind hadn’t fully processed his question. You still weren’t sure why you uttered ‘handcuffs’, but you’d be lying if the toy in the box didn’t make you feel some type of way, mostly damp between your thighs.
Gingerly, you pick up the pink cuffs in your hands. It’s weighty and cool to the touch, and not at all plastic like you had originally imagined. Taking a chance to stare at Jungkook, you can see the glimmer of hope in his eyes as he waits for you to say something.
“Ready to try those out?” Jungkook murmurs, eyes traveling all over your face to gauge your reaction. You swallow thickly, not trusting your voice to say a damn word, but you nod, smiling encouragingly up at him. Jungkook offers you his hand and when you take it, he pulls you into a kiss before stumbling your way into his bedroom, the grip of metal in your hand tightening.
---
Jungkook has you naked in record breaking speed and when the click of metal sounds in your ears, heat floods through your body, as you try to wiggle free to no avail. Your hands are chained above you to the bed post, giving him plenty of access to do whatever he pleases.
He tongue travels south until it meets your heat, nipping at your thighs to keep your legs open before he buries his face in your pussy. The moan that he pulls from you doesn’t sound real, and with every drag of his tongue against your clit, you’re left shaking, legs threatening to crush his head if it weren’t for his strong grip.
“You look pretty spread out to me like this,” he murmurs as his thumbs part your folds. “How are your wrists, beautiful?”
“F-Fine,” you whine, grinding your hips into the air in hopes to steal his attention back to your needy cunt.
It works and you sigh in relief when he reverts his focus back on your clit, two fingers plunging deep into your cunt as he begins to thrust slowly into you. The handcuffs keep you in place, the metal digging in almost painfully with every thrash of your body. You try to be as still as possible, but it’s quite hard when Jungkook is making your body sing with pleasure.
“Cum for me?” he asks, voice dipped in sin as he nips your thighs before returning to take long drags of your cunt with the flat of his tongue. Jungkook grazes your clit with his teeth, slipping a finger in your walls that has you seeing stars.
“Yeah, fuck, gonna cum soon—” you groan, throwing your head back onto the pillow. As he thrusts harder into your dripping cunt, your voice crescendos, moaning his name repeatedly as your body hums with electricity, toes curling with every drag against your walls.
“Jungkook!”
“That’s it, cum for me, angel.”
It’s his gruff voice that sends you over the edge, the metal around your wrists clanking loudly against the bedpost while your muscles spasm, the orgasm spreading through you like fire. Jungkook helps you through it; thrusting languidly before eventually slipping away and unlocking your confines. He massages your wrists, sliding on the bed next to you while he peppers your face with kisses.
“Are you okay? Talk to me.”
You nod, eyes unfocused as you stare at him. “I’m okay,” you manage, nuzzling into his warmth.
Jungkook whispers more praises into your ears, all the while cradling you in his arms. As you regain your breathing and consciousness, you look up, a lazy smirk dancing on your lips. “Wanna do it again?” you laugh and Jungkook can’t do anything else but smile and oblige your request.
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inmyarmswrappedin · 4 years
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DRUCK reactions - s4 ep3
Featuring: the clip that made me infinitely more interested in the season.
Oops, I forgot to link to the Nadia clip twitter thread. It’s there now!
(Thanks again to @wodrueckts! 💛)
CLIP 1: What is this, a tent for ants?
LISTEN. Tua is already the smallest in the girl squad, and that tent doesn’t even look like she can lay fully stretched out inside.
I was so disturbed by this that I looked up 1-person tents, and they don’t look that small! They are longer and thinner.
Amira’s mom comes outside and she’s also disturbed, but not by Amira using a toddler-sized tent, but Amira going camping at all. She’s like, we’re going to have a conversation about traveling while hijabi, but Amira isn’t in the mood.
And her mood is further spoiled because Sam texts her hoping that she can hook her up with Mohammed.
Amira’s mom brings her some pepper spray, and holy shit! Is that legal in Germany? (Answer: yes, it is, but it’s sold as “animal repellent.”)
I’ve traveled on my own before but I’ve always stayed in B&Bs, hostels or hotels. Ngl I wouldn’t even couchsurf at a stranger’s without some kind of protective device, like a portable door lock. I would never carry a weapon because you never know if you’re going to use it properly in the heat of the moment, but something like a personal alarm for runners would work in a camping setting. Take care of yourself if you’re traveling on your own!
CLIP 2: Lemonade pining
Jonas is going on about supporting sea rescue efforts of African migrants in the Mediterranean Sea, a big topic last year because of the Salvini administration (in Italy) approving a law to fine migrant rescue ships. Salvini has been ousted since, and sea rescue has disappeared from the news what with 2020 being a dumpster fire and all.
Essam, high on power, demands that his slave Amira makes him some lemonade, but I already described my issues with this storyline last week. After threatening Amira with the ever classic sibling-on-sibling physical violence, Amira relents.
Mohammed comes in as Amira is sulkily preparing some lemonade for Essam, and he makes a flirty comment about Amira’s ice cold stare again.
The sweet thing about Mohammed is that he fully admits that he finds Amira intimidating, like he totally recognizes that Amira can be unapproachable when she wants to (even though Amira M. is also one of the friendliest Sanas), but like… For one thing he doesn’t neg her about it. He’s playful about Amira being scary, but he’s not trying to bring her down. And for another, Mohammed tries to find ways in which he fits into Amira’s life or can help her in some way.
This will keep coming up with them, but it happens here when he thinks of a way to prank Essam and, as a result, cheer Amira up.
Peep at the interaction between Amira and Mohammed when they come out with the lemonade. They don’t exchange a word, but they’re such a team.
CLIP 3: Beware bicyclists
Amira, apparently still on a high since the lemonade prank, is strolling down the street singing to herself, as I believe most of us have done at some point.
Jonas asks for Amira’s help with his solidarity party, further characterizing Amira as the one they all go to for help.
Sam also texts Amira. She’s found Mohammed’s insta, which makes Amira’s face fall for a moment… Even though Mohammed keeps seeking Amira out, it feels like Sam might be able to hook up with him through sheer force of will? Or maybe Amira is kinda hoping Sam’s crush goes away, but it ain’t.
There’s something really Formal about that family photo that makes it lowkey funny, like I can imagine that pic being one Mohammed’s family sends to their relatives (caption about family and all), instead of one would post on instagram. Somehow, you can feel Mohammed’s latent dad energy just waiting to be discovered.
Even though this wasn’t the way Amira wanted to come across that pic, Mohammed just looks so damn fine that she can’t help but zoom in on his face, a Druck classic at this point.
And she’s so focused on the thirst that she almost gets run over by an islamophobic bicyclist, who thoroughly spoils her day.
This is such a Northern Europe thing btw. I think each one of my friends who has lived in the bike using part of Europe for any period of time has a story about a bicyclist yelling profanities at them. It’s like they’re saving the planet with their lack of gas use so they have to be extra dickish to compensate for their do gooding.
Amira also looks around as this happens, maybe to see if someone else witnessed what happened (for support?).
Anyway, Amira is so angry that she double texts Sam (or possibly just texts? I checked a couple times and it isn’t clear that she sent Sam the text where she translates the caption about family) to be careful with Mohammed as Arabs will fuck you over. She does a double take to herself, like she’s checking with herself that this was appropriate, and seems to decide it is.
I really dislike the context here. When this happened on Skam, it was part of a larger conversation between Sana and Noora where it was clear that Sana was repeating stereotypes in order to discourage Noora’s interest. And even in that conversation, what Sana said is that Muslim guys will sleep with white Norwegians because they put out, but in the end they marry Muslim girls. So rather than saying, he’s gonna fuck you over, Sana explains how. What Amira tells Sam is so lacking in context, so random as a response to Sam asking what the caption says, and like… You kinda have to have watched the Skam scene in order for Amira not to come across like a total dick here.
It also makes no sense because Sana knew that Noora had been hurt in the past by guys using her for sex and then discarding her, but a no strings attached hook up is exactly what Sam is after. So like… How would Mohammed wanting just sex and nothing else fuck Sam over anyway?
CLIP 4: Sam is interested in getting fucked (over)
Amira and Sam are doing boxing intervals, and Sam is a bit taken aback by how intense Amira is at something Sam is presumably doing just for fun.
Now imagine they’d actually written a scene around that difference between both girls, instead of a brief subtextual moment for us to read into.
Mohammed comes in during a pause, which Amira is using to get a bit more practice in whereas Sam is showing off to Kiki (sensing a theme they could’ve explored, here).
It looks like he’s going to go say hi to Amira, but Sam gets there first and starts flirting with him, hair twirling and all. Amira looks upset and goes back to boxing.
CLIP 5: Nadia! [crowd cheers]
At this point when the season was dropping, I was, to be completely honest, a little bored. Like the clips were cute and all, but I wasn’t excited. (Of course, you have to keep in mind that this was in comparison to my excitement levels during Matteo’s season, where so much as a glimpse of David made my synapses light up.)
I loved this clip and immediately posted a full on analysis on twitter (which you can read here if you’re interested, but I’ll be rehashing most of it in this post), and it still holds up in rewatch even though they didn’t mine the Nadia/Amira dynamic for all it was worth.
So we open on Nadia and Amira and they’re already looking tense as shit. It doesn’t help that Amira’s mom seems, like, almost relieved that Nadia hasn’t totally cut ties with Amira lmao. And she’s like, “omg you must have so much to talk about!” even though we just saw them looking quiet and uncomfortable.
Amira is all, “never thought you’d be the first one to marry,” and to Nadia’s credit, she takes this comment, which could read as shady, as a friendly observation. She talks a bit about how Ahmed is not like the other dicks, but Amira isn’t convinced, and now she’s definitely shading Nadia.
She also gets on Nadia’s case about going to Dubai for their honeymoon, but Nadia doesn’t defend herself and just looks sheepish.
Kiki comes in with some vegan cupcakes that she made to thank Amira for her help last episode, and you can see how Amira is much more at ease with Kiki. Tbf they did see each other last week, whereas we know Nadia has been out of the picture for a while. Anyway Kiki seems to feel the tension in the air, so she tries to excuse herself.
At this point, Nadia finds her voice to ask Kiki to stay. Is it because she thinks that with Kiki around conversation will flow more freely? Or maybe because she’s hoping that Amira’s irritation will be redirected to this Alman?
After Kiki admires the vegan spread Amira’s mom prepared, we find out that Nadia’s intention is the latter. She all but tells Kiki that Amira told her Kiki was a racist piece of shit. So this is how Nadia gains the upper hand after Amira’s earlier comments.
Amira looks alarmed, but Kiki is like pfff yeah, I was so into Alexander Humberbumber that I might have been the worst s1 Vilde until Amber made her appearance, but now I’m getting dicked down by a good man and I see Amira for the Muslim goddess she is (I’m paraphrasing but not that much!).
Amira looks really touched by Kiki not just 1. Not picking up Nadia’s intention, but also 2. Swiftly clearing the air and complimenting Amira in the process.
Kiki figures out that Nadia is the friend who’s getting married and declares her love for weddings of all kinds but especially Bollywood-style ones. Nadia looks really amused at this and looks at Amira like, “get a load of this girl!” Amira looks a bit embarrassed.
Sidenote to say Druck started building up to Kiki’s love of weddings last episode when she was paging through a wedding magazine spread. Like, they really put in more work into this Kiki/wedding storyline than most storylines last week.
And when Kiki asks if Nadia’s marriage was arranged, Nadia makes fun of Kiki to Amira. Like I would love to say that Nadia isn’t being mean to Kiki, but she is, and the point is to bring Amira down a notch. Now Amira really does look embarrassed, because in some way she’s supposed to be responsible for Kiki not saying something islamophobic. Kiki isn’t Amira’s responsibility, and I’m sure Nadia would agree in other circumstances, but… That’s what Amira gets for calling Nadia out for the Dubai honeymoon!
But as the conversation goes on, it also kind of seems like Nadia takes a liking to Kiki? (I’m mostly assuming because Nadia later invites Kiki to that pre-wedding event.) They talk a little bit about Nadia and Ahmed, and Kiki’s like, “I want to go to a Muslim wedding so fucking bad, Amira, please!”  It’s like… At the moment Amira is the only single female friend Kiki has, but Kiki’s just like, can’t you just get married now though.
Amira’s like NO WEDDINGS, Australia first. And tension falls around the table again, because of course, Nadia didn’t know about this, but Kiki knew about it, so like… It’s just another way in which Amira has become a different person as far as Nadia is concerned.
Let us now talk about Kiki. Like I said, I really loved this clip. In general I love Skams clips where the dynamic feels so lived in and nuanced and multifaceted. This is the first time we see Nadia in the flesh, but we get so much information just from looks and tone of voice. Nadia’s actress and Tua El-Fawwal just rock this scene.
When it aired I took Kiki’s words at face value. Like, this was the way the writers had decided to resolve Kiki being a racist in earlier seasons, and I accepted it. It wasn’t until later that I read criticism of the scene and thought about it a bit more.
In Skam, Isak apologizes to Eva in three separate scenes. In s1, episode 10, she says to Eva, “I fucked up,” “[if I had known Iben was a psycho] then of course I wouldn’t have done it.” In episode 11, “I know it might be hard to believe, but I never wanted to hurt you. It just turned out that way. I’m sorry.” And in s3, “I just want to say sorry for that stuff last year. When I was ruining things for you and Jonas.” Like. You can say that Isak only said sorry because he got caught (though I personally believe he was genuine every time, if not entirely truthful), but the point is that Julie Andem thought it necessary, in order for Isak to remain a likable character, that he apologized three times.
The girl squad never apologized to Sana, they just showed up with the Los Losers van one day.
And while Druck also thought it was necessary for Matteo to be full of self-loathing over what he did to Hanna, they didn’t think Kiki needed to apologize on screen.
One of my least favorite Skams characters is Basile Savary, because he was a total creep to the point that, during s3, Skam France had to release a damage control text out of Lucas L’s POV because people were worried that he might have done something to Daphné while she was drunk. Basile was a creep who respected no boundaries (including dry humping Daphné against her will on social media, which played off as a joke!) until one day he wasn’t and became the perfect boyfriend. No arc where he learned to be a doper person, Skam France said, no we are not going to examine how nerds get away with being gross creeps.
And as much as I would like to say otherwise, Druck did the same with Kiki. Kiki was one of the most overtly racist Vildes in s1, was still making offensive comments about Amira’s and Sam’s hair in s2, and then… Season 4 rolls around and Kiki just says, “oh yeah I was a dick before but now I know Amira is a great Muslim.” Like… At least it didn’t happen from one day to the next, but no, there wasn’t an arc where Kiki is taken to task for her racism, nor a scene where Kiki apologizes to Amira.  
This is an issue specifically because Amira’s season hinges on the Kiki/Amira friendship, like they pretty much got rid of most other conflicts or didn’t explore them fully, choosing instead to focus on this dynamic.
And I don’t think it was because Lea and Tua are such good friends irl (which they are! Lea even attended Tua’s engagement party! I love them!), because like, Tua is also good friends with Carl (Stefan) and we never got an Amira/Stefan scene, did we? I think it was simply that this season was too packed with people of color, and either funk or the writers needed a white character to anchor the season.
I still love Kiki and Amira obviously, I ship them (in fanon) and I love their scenes, because I love Lea and Tua and their friendship, and their characters. All I wanted from s4 of Skam was Vilde supporting Sana in the way Sana had supported Vilde for three seasons, and Druck gave me that. But here’s one thing where the writers dropped the ball, and it’s a massive mistake because the emotional core of the season is this friendship.
This also made me think about how the change of writers resulted in character arcs being dropped left and right. Now that two writing collectives are about to pick up Druck’s next gen, I think there’s an idea that the change in writers in the first four seasons wasn’t noticeable, but honestly… It kind of was. I would argue that a lot of the things that were set up in s1 and s2 got dropped and didn’t go anywhere. To wit:
Hanna’s arc in s1 is trashed in s4. Jonas is set up with a redemption arc in s2 that isn’t explored past that season. The Winterberg of s2 has nothing to do with the s4 ship. Kiki is still being racist in s2 and a shining example of allyship in s4. The little depth that Sam had in s1 and s2 gets dropped. Amira’s delivery job… Enough said. The one character whose character arc through the seasons was done justice I would argue is Matteo. He gets a shift in characterization after s1 to make the storyline with David make more sense (more on this if I ever write Matteo’s season meta), and retains that characterization to the end. Of the minor characters, Carlos and Abdi also come out well. David gets introduced in s3 when Q3 took over the writing, so he wasn’t affected.
Anyway, this clip totally revitalized the season.
CLIP 6: Amira praying, that’s it, that’s the clip
Mohammed is at the door waiting for Amira, and when Amira asks him if Sam is already there, he says he’s not here because of Sam. And I’m like, does he mean that literally? Like Amira could’ve assumed Sam invited him to this party, but Mohammed did meet the squads last episode. Maybe he asked Jonas if Amira was coming or got himself invited some other way.
Amira’s like sure, and gets inside. And Mohammed looks at her in such a way that even I need to fan myself a little tbh.
Hanna compliments David’s design, and Matteo’s like yeah, David is great, but I’d rather shit on Stefan. Idk, I feel like the Matteo in my mind would want to hype David up a little more before moving onto shitting on Stefan, but it’s a small quibble.
Amira goes to help Sam in the kitchen, and they both have some trouble making German food. I can’t tell if it’s because they’re generally bad at cooking or this is a commentary on white people’s palates. Or Abdi’s palate since he’s still going on about hollandaise sauce.
Oh, Sam explains that she told Mohammed about the party and he got on board. So he is there because of Sam, kinda.
They also talk about Mohammed having the coolest insta (pro: Mohammed has at least one topless pic, con: Mohammed has a pic wearing flip flops with socks), and how Abdi doesn’t compare because he doesn’t have an insta (yet). I mean… Damn, Sam. You can’t argue with logic like that.
But Sam calls Amira out on being weird lately. Again, I really wish this conversation didn’t rely so much on subtext, so it could be properly developed. Also, a new version of Snow’s Informer is playing in the background during this conversation and I can’t help but love the mood whiplash of it all.
Then something confusing happens when Jonas introduces the music act and says they come from Lebanon and traveled to Germany by train and then the lead singer says they’re from Berlin. They’re called Feedback and I tried googling them to find out what that’s all about, but with that name I didn’t get any results about them.
At least this is the kind of band that would play at an event like this, like they seem good enough to do a performance, but not big enough that there’s no believable way Jonas could book them.
Amira and Mohammed have a ~Moment~ when the audio switches to the version of Sand performed by Lary, and the sexual tension is so overwhelming for Amira that she immediately leaves to get some praying done, in the privacy of the venue’s backroom.
This scene is so iconic and beautiful. That shot of Amira being lit from above, looking up with her hands held before her? Talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show stopping, etc. The kind of sequence that needs both a Muslim performer and behind the scenes respect for said Muslim performer.
Amira overhears some argument as she’s folding the carpet she was using, and then she sees that Mohammed was blocking the door, so that she could pray in peace. Can we get a #notallmen here? Thanks. Again, Mohammed just finds little ways in which he can help and support Amira without being intrusive.
Mohammed compliments Amira’s friends for trying to help refugees (although sea rescue is more about migrants in general, rather than refugees). I think something that is lost in translation is that German is obviously not Mohammed’s first language, so I think this scene is more significant and subtext-laden for German speakers.
Amira is probably still smarting from her earlier run in with the racist biker, so she (who’s always said she wants to be Chancellor) says that Jonas will probably become Chancellor one day. Mohammed says no! Amira should be Chancellor, but Amira doesn’t think anyone wants that. 🙁 But Mohammed says he does, and he says “we” need someone who fights for “us” (which Amira probably interprets as “us Muslims,” but Mohammed might mean more like, “us refugees”).
Also, Mohammed thinks that Amira was trying to matchmake him with Sam, which we know it was more like the opposite, but it’s very in line for Mohammed to think Amira was trying to get rid of him.
Then Mohammed asks Amira for her phone and is all, “don’t you trust me?” and Amira’s like, “no,” which is hilarious. After a while, Amira wants her phone back and Mohammed notices Amira accidentally cut herself with the knife earlier. He puts a cute bandaid on it, and they have yet another Moment. They’re so into each other that Amira goes, “omg I love this song! Let’s go in!” But Mohammed is now sure his feelings are requited.
Social media
Kiki slept at the new apartment even though it’s falling apart, a sign that that she can’t stand being at her mom’s house. Later, Zoe texts her and Kiki says she’ll be available whenever Zoe needs her, but she also just… doesn’t want to live at her mom’s.
Matteo and David (but really just Lukas) attended the Berlin CSD (Pride) march.
Mia posts a pic of a cortado coffee, and I totally believe this was taken in Madrid. 👌
Carlos missed the Abiball because he failed his History resit, then he missed Jonas’ birthday because he was sick, and this week he’s visiting Brandenburg with Kiki, and what I’m getting from all this is that maybe Carlos’ actor had other commitments during this time lol.
Amira and Mohammed both post pics acknowledging their Moment under the lights/with the bandaid, showing Amira is getting more emotionally committed to this relationship.
Final thoughts
While I did have some issues with this episode, it was much more solid overall than episode 2. Nadia’s actress really delivered in her intro clip and I wish they’d explored that dynamic a bit more, but the character kind of takes a backseat after this. Although I don’t feel like Amira and Mohammed have a motif or object that they keep revisiting (like Jonas and Hanna with Hanna’s nose, or Mia and Alex with Hotel Hardenberg, or David and Matteo with the sandwiches*), I like their dynamic where Mohammed is supportive of Amira’s endeavors, which this episode solidifies. I also really love the significance of Amira getting to complete her prayer thanks to Mohammed. In Skam, Sana gets constantly interrupted until later in the season, where she gets to pray for all her friends.
[* I thought about this a bit more, and I think one motif Mohammed and Amira share is music, and singing to each other.]
I discussed this episode with Michi, and we came to the conclusion that the root conflict between Amira and Nadia is that Amira feels like that, to be with a man, is to compromise yourself and your principles. Nadia didn’t use to be the person who’d be the first to marry, or who’d go on a honeymoon to Dubai, and Amira sees that chance as Nadia losing sight of her ideals. But, in the last clip, Mohammed’s actions allow Amira to be who she fully is, and to finish her prayer. So the idea is planted, that Amira wouldn’t necessarily have to compromise her principles if she got into a relationship. Of course, Mohammed is probably one of the people who’d most compromise Amira’s ideals if she were to date him, but we’re not at that point yet.  
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lockdownuk · 4 years
Text
Lockdown Diary Part 3
A personal account during the lockdown in the UK due to the Covid-19 outbreak.
23/03/2020 8:30pm Boris Johnson, UK Prime Minister, gives a live address to the nation to, effectively, put the country on lockdown to stem the spread of the deadly coronavirus strain, Covid-19.
Many of us have been self-isolating for days but this latest development within the UK in reaction to the pandemic feels very serious and very scary. I decided to keep a simple diary and where better but online.
Day 61: Writing this in the afternoon on day 62. An exercise driven day. Two walks and stair climb as usual plus I popped round Jeff’s early evening. First time I’ve been to his house, 1 Garden Row, Elmington. It’s further than I thought so, with walking there an back, I managed a daily total of 14km. It was good to see him and have a social (but social-distanced) beer. When I got home, @9:45pm, I made thai green chicken curry, watch The Report (a great, if worrying film) and then TikTok-ed until gone 5am!
Day 62: Typing this on day 64! Beer round Karen’s. Missed Sam’s quiz.
Day 63: Typing this on day 64! Beer round Karen’s. Again! Well, it is bank holiday Monday! Had dirty pizza for tea and watched The Heat. Again! It is the most piss funny film.
Day 64: Well, I have been feeling guilty about treatung the bank holiday w/e l;ike a bank holiday w/e. It’s dawned on me that that guilt is way too self-disiciplned. I got up about midday, usual two walks and stair climb but that’s it. I need to clean the house from top to bottom, get on top of my online courses, get the garden done, get the car fixed, go shopping…fucking hell - if only I had the time…
Day 65: Today I swapped Amazon prime free trial for about the 5th time in my life. Same card and address - will they get wind of my skullduggery. This is all so I can finish watching Hunters and catch Homecoming S2. I went shopping at Asda near Raunds. I wish I hadn’t, it’s no good for a comprehensive shop. Received an email from RCI inviting me to a Zoom meeting with Pal Mulcahy for a business update. I fear the worst. And it’s at 10:00am, FFS!
Day 66: Logged in an attended zoom forum with Paul Mulcahy and over 250 RCI staff this morning. The message was that there is going to be redundancies. I expected this and expected to fall victim. All staff that are going to be put through cionsultation would be contacted today. I however wasn’t! Very, very surpised. meanwhile, Nick Reilly asked to connect via LinkedIn (including become a LinkedIn staff team member -  that’s new to me so I’ll see what it is but I accepted the invitation) Later, I WhatsApp-ed him and asked who has been affected from IT. All he could tell me was no one on Jon Rodger’s team is under threat. Also, Mark C emailed - I’ll respond tomorrow. I got up at 09:00ish and had my mornming walk before the 10:00am meeting. I am now, at 09:30pm, fucking knackered. Dinner and then bed, methinks but not before one more episdoe of Hunters!
Day 67: Typing on Day 68. Got pretty drunk last night. I’ve got blisters from walking (new boots) so I don’t think I’ll walk tomorrow (well, today!).
Day 68: I did fuck all today. Got up after 1pm, no walking. I did manage to clean the bathroom (and smash my little mirror) and do my 26 stair climb. I am typing at 9pm and I feel whacked!
Day 69: I have an abscess. It’s not too painful (today) but I am going to call the dentist tomorrow (Monday). I think antibiotics are in order. I watched a film, which I actually started yesterday, called The Voices starring Ryan Reynolds, Gemma Arteton and Anna Kendrick. Fuuuuuuuuuuuucking weird. The closing credits are the most bizarre, in context, I’ve ever seen. But, in general, a very good film. Back to normal exercise regime today plus hovered the hall and stairs. Get me. It’ll be interetingh to see my Google Fit figures for May tomorrow.
Day 70: Contacted the dentist who advised salt water rinsing and ibuprofen. But, tbf, it’s a lot better today and the swelling has gone right down. The dentist I called was the Oundle House (Rodericks) one. I was not hopeful since last time I saw them they referred me to their Northampton clinic for root canal work which was quoted at over £600. However, the dentist was very nice, had my x-ray to hand from that last visit and seemed more interested in making sure I’m OK than gaining a paying customer. He still wants to see me when possible though! I must mention the weather. It has been glorious weather nearly every day throughout May (it’s June 1st today). Seriously sunny and like a holiday every day. The news mentioned it today - the level of sunshine throughout the transition from spring to summer is unprecedented, apparently. My T shirt tan is, quite frankly, ridiculous!
Day 71: Today’s ‘must mention’ is what’s going on in the US and it’s not particularly related to Trump. There was a black man killed while under arrest. George Floyd died Monday 25th May (8 days ago) A policeman, who knelt on his neck for minutes while he complained of not being able to breathe, has been charged with murder. Now there are riots and curfews and military intervention all over the country. It’s similar to the English riots of 2011. It’s worrying, sad, scary and not what the fight against the pandemic needs. Most of all, it’s racism rearing its ugly head yet again. I’ve had a normal-ish day. received an email from Jim checking in, talked to a recruiter about a promising job lead (although the hours are 8-5 which I am not happy about), talked to Barry across the road and sent Barzzy a WhatsApp. And I logged in Shaw Academy and started lesson one of module 2 of web Design. It’s been a while, so long overdue, but I only did about 15 minutes. Must try harder / do better! As I type, late (10:10pm) I have dinner cooking and a strange pain in my left side and am in the middle of No Country for Old Men. Don’t think I’ve seen it since the cinema (13 years!)
Day 72: As soon as (well, within a couple of days) I mention the weather, it turns. It’s rained a little and is a lot cooler (15° rather than mid-20s). Much better for walking, I have to say. I finished Hunters today (Amazon Prime series). While I enjoyed it, it got too surreal at the end. It is loosely based on the real story of Nazi hunters in the US in 1977 but the straying from loosely based to down-right ridiculous fiction annoyed me. If it goes to S2, I will watch it, however. Received some of my rental deposit back today (the law changed so that only 5 weeks rent can be demanded as deposit). Over £600. Nice.
Day 73: I made a short video for Marc and Clare’s 26th wedding anniversary. I ‘dressed up’ for it. I enjoyed doing it and I think it was appreciated.
Day 74: Typing on Day 75 for no other reason than I couldn’t be bothered on day 74! I received a letter either today or the day before (well, yesterday or the previous day!) from Mr Minos at the eye clinic informing me that, while there is some stuff going on in both eyes (garnered from the photo scans done at the last hospital appointment), he wants to see me in three months. Always a refief when that happens. Been getting into two series on Amazon: Alex Rider and Modern Love. One is a male Hanna, the other is soppy affairs of the heart based on real life stories (from essays written in the NY Times). Both enjoyable for totally different reasons.
Day 75: Lazyish day. Well, not really, just that I only went for one walk, alebit 6km andI got pissed on. Wehn the rain hit, it was also fucking freezing! Some of the clouds were stunning today, made for great photos. As I type, it’s 21:12, I’m listening the wonderful Phoebe Bridgiers. Now, I’m gonna make some tea and sup a few ales, I reckon.
Day 76: Done lots of walking today (over 13,000 steps) I made sausage casserole with too much chilli (scotch bonnet and birdeye). I had an online (fb) debate with Sam over whether the George Floyd murder was a racial.
Day 77: Received a new (used) wing mirror for the car. £18 with delivery, I reckon that’s a bargain. I cashed in £20 from Prolific as well, so I’m satisfied at the financial full-circle. Dropped the car off at Barnwell (Nene Valley Body Shop) and walked back - 7km. Just about to dive into tea - finishing the blazing hot sausage casserole from yesterday. Then I’m going to do some more Rubik’s cube practice with my recently acquired GoCube.
Day 78: Lots of daily walking, 26 stair climb, press-up and late nights watching TikTok (gone 3am this morning) are making for a constantly knackered Tim Stubbs. Today I made veg soup and cooked up some meatballs. Both are delish. How did I ever to learn how to conjure up such stuff? The Rubik’s cube learning is coming along except that I need good daylight to distinguish between the yellow and white faces on the flipping thing!
Day 79: Listening to Radio 6 most the day and the news is making for dire listening. Forecast of severe recession, especially if there is a second peak of the virus, which I think there will be. Plus, an offshoot of the George Floyd murder and the #BlackLivesMatter movement, institutions and town councils are being lobbied by campaigners to remove statues of anyone associated with things like slavery (one was toppled in Bristol at the w/e) and rename buildings etc. that were named after historical characters with any links to something that now is deemed wrong or offensive. I agree with it but it’s not pleasant to hear amongst other bleak news. Walked to Barnwell to collect my car - front trim reseated and new wing mirror fitted, £20 - bargain (I source the replacement wing mirror). But, also, forked out £165 on car tax! Cleaned the lounge from top to bottom. Knackering!
Day 80: Chatted with Dad and Rita - he’s pissed off with the slavery backlash but otherwise they are both OK. I saw Baz in the Tesco queue where I mentioned my disgust at the Thursday market being allowed (I found I could not maintain 2m at all times just walking to Tesco’s!) and that I really don’t want to catch Covid19 as I will probably die. Maybe a bit dramatic but he messaged me later today to say he’d been thinking on what I said and offered to shop for me. I replied that I am OK to shop but am scared at how people are taking things so much less seriously than when lockdown started yet the virus is still out there just as it was then! I am very touched at his massage. I thoroughly cleaned the bedroom and changed the bedclothes today. House work really knackers me out!
Day 81: Spare room cleaned today. Not much else to type about. It’s Friday, I making curried mince and I don’t feel like a beer. How I’ve changed!
Day 82: I did have beers last night. Ended up going to bed with daylight and dawn chorus for company. Today, when I woke, gone 1pm, I have been greeted by what can only be described as thoroughly depressing news from every quarter. This includes violence in the capital, further virus outbreak in Beijing. Fog’s political posts on FB make for depressing (but vaild) reading. I’m feeling thoroughly fed up today. Not even music can lift my mood…
…but, I am currently listening to Craig Charles on BBCR6 and, I have to say, he’s putting in quite an exceptional effort - there may be hope that my mood might lift, even at gone 8pm! I might have a beer or two and grab something postivity and enjoyment from the day after all.
Day 83: Another late one last night but up before noon today. Started watching something called Condor on Sky One. It’s OK - there’s stuff I wanna waytch on Amazon Prime but, more often than not, it keeps telling me there’s ‘a problem’ when I try to play anything. Pissing me off. I just checked and I have two weeks of the initial 12 of furlough to go. I shall started asking the questions about what might happen on the Connections website.
Day 84: Typing this on Day 85. On the way back from dropping off some shoes for Sean Davies at his brother’s (martin) I met Karen and she said why not pop round for a beer so I did. Certainly not used to a drink on a Monday so that, and the genral upheaval to my evening, while good fun and a nice change, put pay to my usual diary entry! I sorted Amazon Prime out by leaving the TV turned off for over an hour. Day 85: Tim did the garden today and it looks great. The pipes in the bathroom have been knocking loudly, on and off, for a couple of weeks now. Last night, they were so loud that today I took it upon myself to resolve it or ring Woodfords. So, having turned off the water, run the taps dry to get rid of any trapped air and then turned the water back on slowly, I discoved it’s the cistern and its pipes. Woodfords are arranging Corvee to visit. Meanwhile, leaving the water turned off at least stops the noise which is, otherwise, costant and unbearable! I emailed HR a couple of days ago about what’s happening in a couple of weeks time in terms of furlough when the 12 weeks will be up. Sue Cockimngs got back to me attaching an email Deryn sent on 15th May which I never received. Basically, they’ll extend furlough if need be and an update should be forthcoming late May/early June. Well, that time has passed, so who knows what is going to happen. The furlough scheme (CJRS) has been changed by the govenment, I’ve read, and it looks like any new people would have to have been furloughed by June 10th (it’s the 16th today) so no furlough rotation, which is annoying. The CJRS ends 1st October with employer contributions required from 1st August - that’s D-Day as far as I am concerned….so job hunting will have to step up a notch! Day 86: Pete’s birthday and he bought himself the same speaker as me. When I asked if it lived up to his expectations he mentioned it’s better through WiFi than Bluetooth. That confused me as I haven’t got WiFi available on mine…..long story short, I bought the wrong fucking speaker. I got a AudioPro AddOn T10 instead of C10. To say I am fucked off is an understatement. To think I was so pleased at the cheap price I paid. Now I feel like I have wasted  €200. Bollocks.
Day 87: Finished Alex Rider last night. Another series that started off so well and ended a litte weak but, overall, not bad. I’ve started keeping strange meal times…lunch very late (4pm) and dinner really late (11pm). I need to sort it ‘cos it’s playing havoc with my sugar levels. I had a huge hypo while having my second walk today, second day on the trot that’s happened. My late dinner was Chinese chicked curry with a quarter of a scotch bonnet and two birdeye chillies. Delish.
Day 88: I have managed to be bitten yesterday or the day before on one of my walks. There are strange, itchy lumps on my right inner forearm. And I do mean itchy. I trimmed my sideburns today, I was very pissed off with them. My hair looks just a little less shit. I did a shop at Tesco in Corby today. Mainly booze as follows: 20 cans Sam Miguel £18 18 cans Stella £15 20 bottles Bud £10 8 cans Tyskie £9 3 lrg bottles Warsteiner £5 £57 Bargain.
Day 89: Lazy day. One short walk and usual stair climb. Howard and Sue popped round to give me a pressie - bottle of Monkey Shoulder. I’m building up quite a collection of whisky!
Day 90: Dad called and we chatted for an hour or so. I had to apologise for not sending a father’s day card! Dan messaged me and offered to pay for a pizza delivery which I declined.
Football has started again this past week…Prem and Championship only. L1 and L2 season was cut short and Posh missed out on the play-offs by one place. As I type, Everton v Liverpool is on Sky Sports on a Sunday evening - it’s very strange with no crowd. There’s crowd noise being played thorugh the tannoy.
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lockdownuk · 3 years
Text
Lockdown Diary Part 11
A personal account during the lockdown in the UK due to the Covid-19 outbreak.
23/03/2020 8:30pm Boris Johnson, UK Prime Minister, gives a live address to the nation to, effectively, put the country on lockdown to stem the spread of the deadly coronavirus strain, Covid-19.Many of us have been self-isolating for days but this latest development within the UK in reaction to the pandemic feels very serious and very scary. I decided to keep a simple diary and where better but online.
Day 301: Up at 1pm after a good few bevvies last night. usual Saturday stuff but my walk was astop/start affair due to yet more flooding. 
Facebook today informed me that Karen Wyles died suddenly. It really shocked me. I saw Guy and Gail while out walking (nice to bump into them and chat) and they told me it was a heart attack! I sent K a WhatsApp just in case she’d not heard. I put a few words on FB. I had known Karen for a long time and, while I took the piss a lot, she was a friend (that I often didn’t deserve) and a good person....I felt a responsibility to say something nice as a small homage.
During the week I ordered new boots (since my Merrells are fucked after only  few months but I am getting my money back) and, today, I also ordered McKenzie Attwood trainers (£20 cheap as fuck from JD Sports sale), slippers and jogging bottoms from Amazon. 
Now I am going to have pizza, drink, smoke and watch The Equalizer 2 (for the umpteenth time - I watched the first one last night). I could watch Tenet - Miles has given me his Amazon login details, which is pretty fucking cool of him, but I’m not in the mood.
Posh beat MK 3-0 at home. I fucking love beating them. It’s extremely satisfying.
Right, it’s Saturday, it’s nearly 9pm, time I got on it.
Day 302: Not the most mental night last night but still 4am-ish when I went to bed, so I am very pleased to type that I was up before my alarm this morning. But, also, as I type, at gone 10pm, I am fucking knackered. Just about to tuck into spicy-as-fuck sauasage casserole, wtach MotD2 and then bed!
Day 303: Slippers arrived today but they’re going back. Too tight in the left foot. I’m not wearing slippers in FFS!
Day 304: New trainers (McKenzie Attwoods) arrived. Now, this footwear I shall keep. £20, bargain.
Posh came from a goal down to beat Charlton at home 2-1. Nice.
I made some veg soup today and, quite frankly, it’s fucking stupidly chilli-fied. Barely edible.
Day 305: New trainers are sweet - wore them for my morning exercise routine. Pretty comfy - after a few wears, they’ll be ace, I think.
Got served notice on the house on Monday (why I didn’t enter that on day 303, I do not know). Lynda, from Woodfords, says a semi-detached place in Havelock Cottages is coming up that looks promising. I contacted Emily at Aspire today, there’s a two bed terrace in Basset Place coming up so i am looking at that on Monday. Choice of 2 I do hope! First is £700 pm, second £725.
Day 306: Flipping frustrating “nothing works” day at work, It’s been like it all year so far. Tbf, Sueanne gets it and is quite supportive, even though she dives in when I’ve been dealing with problems that drag on! It’s Thursday, I can’t wait for tomorrow and, I am all to aware, I am wishing what little life I have left away.
Spoke with dad, he had his first vaccination jab on Tuesday in Spalding - he said it was a very efficient process (he was full of praise) and that the jab itself was no bother, with no after effects apart from a slightly sore arm. Excellent!
Day 307: Not even one beer (Saporro) in, and I feel wasted. A toke has helped.
Day 308: New Scarpa boots arrived today and, while they will need some wearing in, I did the stair climb and a 45min walk in them. I think they are going to be ace. Just as well as the Merrells are falling apart.
I have decided to listen to the Rush back catalogue, 2112 (4th) is playing as I type. It’s been a trip down memory lane and a bloody good one!
I had a few beers last night, as yesterday’s entry confirms, which included a video catch up with Fog, Ham and Andy P. Gonna chat with Fog later tonight as well.
I watched King of Statten Island last night. I liked it but, in some parts, it was smultzy as hell, rendering it a 6/10. Later, I’m watching Outside the Wire and eating pizza. Can’t wait!
I reset my mobile yesterday ‘cos it’s been playing up. What a fucking ball ache, logging on to all the different apps, all the little settings you get so used to, only to miss them when set back to defaults. Things like the camera settings - photo size and watermark....ooooh, just realised, ‘first world problems’! Get a grip, Tim!
Day 309: SNOW! Thick and crisp and uneven. I walked 11.9km in it today and it fucking well knackered me out. The old Merrells held their own in the snow as well, totally waterproof and, for such a light boot, remarkably warm. I will actually be sorry to see them go.
Danny sent me a link to a free week’s worth of receipes from Hello Fresh (he’s nuts for it) so I and ordered one, worth nearly £40! 
Posh won away from home yesterday at Ipswich. Now, get this: the stats on the BBC’s report showed Posh had no shots on target but still won 0-1. How, might one ask? Own goal, that’s how. Piss funny!
Day 310: I am aching today. Walking in the snow yesterday certainly exercised different muscles than walking in mud. And, today, I walked less than normal, usual lunchtime but only 4km (instead of 8) in the evening. 
‘Cos of the snow, the woman from Aspire cried off showing me around 3 Bassett Place. At first I was well pissed off but, looking at the roads and traffic situation around Oundle, it was the right decision (she’d have had to get here from Nassington - a bit treacherous),
It’s just gone 8pm. I am going to eat and go to bed. It’s too fucking cold even with the heating on!
Day 311: Rearranged the viewing of Bassett Place tomorrow - I rang them ‘cos I saw it advertised on Facebook, FFS! My walk tonight was mad...melting snow, rain/sleet, ice made for fucking hard work. Plus, since I am wearing in the new Scarpas, I wore the Merrells. The right boot is now, most definitely not waterproof! Got home about 8pm, changed bed sheets, showered and made diner...bloody knackered. It’s now 11pm and I am off to beddy byes.
Day 312: Viewed Bassett Place and I really like it. It is advertised at £750pm but Emily (from Aspire) said it was £725. Sarah, who showed me round said there may be some leeway for the right tenant so i’ve asked if it could be done for £700. If so, I’ll take it. It’s a large two bed mid terrace, bigger than here (36, East Road), similar type place, just what I want. Fingers crossed.
Day 313: Having slept on it, I do believe I definitely want 3 Bassett Place. I phone Sarah at Apsire to say as much. She told me she’d forwarded my details and offer to the landlord and is waiting to hear. As yesterday, fingers crossed.
I couldn’t take the pic of the field for the Morning Walk album, too flooded due to melting snow. On that note, my new boots are getting worn in both by wear and by superficial looks, it’s that filthy out there. I need to clean them. I wonder that, if I’d cleaned the Merrells, they might have lasted a bit longer. That being said, no amount of cleaning would have save the soles from wearing as thin as quickly as they did.
Day 314: Typing on Day 315. I didn’t get Bassett Place, the landlord gave it to a couple who offerred full asking price. To say I was fucked off is an understatement. I phoned Emily to let her know as much. Tbf, she explained that the snow (delaying my original viewing) wasn’t her fault and that she is at the mercy of the landlord. Fair enough, when I heard her POV. But, I am still gutted. I should have gone for the full £750!
Glad the working week is over (I am really wishing my life away so far this year).
Long walk to Cotterstock - amazing light behind the clouds with a wolf moon (which I just looked up - full moon, basically) - I just wish I was a bit better at night photography, or at least the camera on the Mi9 was. However, once I tweak them a bit and post them, the feed back is usually good. In fact, I posted one on the move last night and someone on FB has asked if they can paint it!
Meatballs for tea and beers.
I have decided, when the year of this log is up, that I’ll end it (the diary, not my life, though that dark thought is never far away!). I have reached this decision because, while this diary is really only for me, it is as boring as fuck, really. I’ll continue to write a log but randomly, when the day’s events warrant it. It’ll be on the main Tumblr.
Day 315: Typing this on day 316. Up at 1pm-ish. Morning exercise routine, long walk curtailed by flooding (again!) more beers, smokes and trash food. Posh lost 2-0 away to Shrewsbury (a bit of a bogey team).
Day 316: Up at 1pm yet again. I really didn't feel like any exercise but I did the usual regardless. Google Fit isn’t fucking working!
I have got to start stopping these ridiculously late Friday and Saturday nights. My weekend is over before it’s begun. This coming Friday, I am not going to do the really long walk in the evening that i have become accustomed to - just a 8km one that I do most evening, and then start drinking earlier so as to go to bed early. If I can get out of bed in the Saturday morning, perhaps do a couple of long walks so as to get the weekly steps up.
Day 317: My left foot, during my lunchtime walk, killed. I must have sopped and undone & redone my laces 6 times. Dunno wtf is going on with the Scarpas. I wore my Merrells for the evening walk. I tried to got to Cotterstock but it was too flooded on the road just before the bridge!
Ordered new joggers, a boot brush and some new wireless earbuds (Mifo 05 plus Gen 2 - bought them off eBay -I hope they are the real deal, it’s the very latest spec and £74.99 instead of £89.99 from the Mifo website).
Day 318: I went shopping at 10.15pm mainly for pizza and party food since I have booked Monday off because it’s the Superbowl (Tampa vs Kansas) and booze! No fucking Sapporo. It was eerie shopping that late at the superstore in Corby. Boots still hurting (Merrells in the evening). Day 319: New ear buds arrived. Well impressed. So did the boot brush (BootBuddy) - on that note, boots weren’t so bad at lunchtime. I didn’t wear them in the evening but I think it’s just a ‘wearing them in’ thing, hopefully.
Day 320: Hello Fresh delivery day. I had pork and chipotle black bean tacos with pickled red onion, chipotle tomatoes and lettuce. It’s a good set up, decent ingredients and nice recipe sheets...but I don't need it, I’m good enough in the kitchen. And, I am no fan of minced pork. I am not being a fair judge though. Today, my sugars have been all over the place over 21 and under 2 mmol/L. I nearly fell asleep trying to recover from a low before my evening walk. When I got back (soaked - it was pissing down), I was over 21 by the time I had cooked it all....puts me off actually eating, even though I have to! Rang Barry Haddon today, to see how he is. I think he’s OK but, strangely, told me, during conversation, that he’s 77 years old. I don't think so! I also texted Posh Dave. I think he’s struggling being on his own (he lost mum and dad last year, I think). I must make more contact with him. I might call him over the weekend.
Day 321: Typing on Day 322 (well, 1am on day 323 actually). It was nice finishing work knowing I have Monday off. I also din’t do an extra long walk this evening as with most Fridays. Cooked the send Hello fresk meal, Mango chicken tacos -diced chicken thighs - it was alright. Rog video called so had a good chat with him and I invited Foggy to it (he was at his cousin John’s funeral today), so the three of us chewed the cud for a bit. I then went onto get fucking shitfaced. I couldn’t make it to bed with low sugars, lying on the runner rug, fell asleep, got up and could only make it top the living room rug..I felt so dodgy but I was too fucked and too full to even take more than a swig of coke. I think I’m going to fall asleep one drunken night, slip into a coma and then die. I can think of worse ways to go. Day 322: Typing  very late, it’s actually Sunday morning, 1.07am. I got out of bed at gone 2.30pm today. I managed my morning routine and a 8km walk (in the Scarpas, they are getting more comfortable since my episode of pain a few days ago; definitely a wearing in process). No booze after last night’s debacle. I am going to hit it during the Superbowl tomorrow though. The Hello fresh meal tonight was pasta chicken bake with pepper and courgette. Fucking lovely and I coudln’t eat it all. I’ve lerant that adding creme fresh to pasta, whacking it on top of meat and sauce on a casserole bowl and baking it for 15 minutes is the way to go. I watched The Dig tonight. It’s a good film but fucking glum. Posh won at home to Crewe today, 2-0. They are now 4th. Day 323:Bright as a button today, up at around 11:00am despite switch in the bedroom light off at just before 3am. Today’s walk was fucking hard work. It’s wintry, the wind was keen, strong and full of icy particles just not quite sleet. The fields between Park Wood and Monson Way were bloody tough. One wrong foot and you’d slip over. I did about 10 km; it took over 2 hours and felt like twice the distance.  I’ve just eaten Hello Fresk teryaki mince. It was good. One beer in, a film (probably One Night in Miami) and then Superbowl time. Day 324: The Superbowl was good. Tampa beat Kansas 31-9. The second half was a damp squib since Kansas never made a go of it. Tom Brady won his 7th ring. He is to American football what Federer is to tennis. The Weeknd half time show was excellent. So, it was about 4am I went to bed, nicely pissed. Up at just after 1pm. Exercise, omelette, long walk, done some washing. About to make the last Hello Fresh meal and watch One Night in Miami which I didn’t manage last night.   Richard sent me a message (screen shot of a) house up for shared ownership in Oundle (Sharmann & Quinney) - I need to look into what that is all about.
Day 325: Shared ownership isn’t straightforward and, actually, I have discovered that I need to look at something call ‘older persons shared ownership’ when I hit 55. Jon at work wants me to get involved in two additional pieces of work, he told me at the SUMO today (Sueanne is off) - he did say that “that’s what happens if you have a day off! Finished the last of the Hello Fresh (last night’s sausage bolognese including homemade garlic bread using a Tiger loaf from Co-Op which was reduced to 28p. I didn’t watch One Night in Miami last night. Shock. Day 326: I spoke with Lynda from Woodfords yesterday, viewing 13 Havelock Cottages tomorrow. Also, yesterday, Posh beat Ipswich 2-1 at home. They came from behind. Ipswich have never beaten Posh away. Simon Banwell posted on FB berating some new legislation whereby potentially people who travel and lie about it (the destination) are liable for 10 years in prison. His gripe is people get less for murder. I am beyond words...the potential for mass deaths of such actions! I tried to argue that case but it is, as always on social media, flogging a dead horse. Rachel Harris jumped on Simon’s bandwagon whereas Tim Francis posted a ‘well said’ to me (I think it’s genuine). Day 327: Carrying on directly from above; Candice Bellingsea, Rachel’s niece, Carla’s daughter, was also ‘vocal’ in defence of Simon’s post, joining in with the clamour for relaxation of lockdown (at the expense of safety) - citing more people commit suicide because of the mental pressure than die of covid. Well, today, I investigated and posted a FB status to poo-poo such claims. It felt good (and right) to address Candice’s ridiculous post albeit, I didn’t call her out directly but did have part of her comment on Simon’s post directly quoted in my status. I went to see 13 Havelock today. It’s OK. Not perfect but more than alright. When I left there I was very much in two minds but now, at 10:30pm, the place is growing on me. Still part of me thinks to hold out - I have got around 5 month’s notice left - but, if I let it go (and Lynda from Woodford’s has already said the landlord is happy for me to move in), I might regret it. I keep thinking of 3 Bassett Place though...if only I had said yes to £750 straightaway. That place would be perfect, I reckon. One major concern with 13 is the neighbours. There’s no way I could have my usual Friday and Saturday night revelry. But...I’ll sleep on it. I have only just finished doing some work - pissing about with Smartview Essbase (with Simon Welch’s help - he’s a bloody good bloke - no need to be so helpful, but he’s more than happy to be) - I sent him a Teams message to arrange a catch up tomorrow with some questions I have regarding the installation - he only bloody answered - working as late as I am! I have managed to watch some of One Night in Miami. Going to finish it now with a dirty, microwave hamburger for tea.
Day 328: Typing on day 329. Usual Friday but not so mad in the evening. One Night in Miami was good. For Friday’s viewing I chose Greenland. Not so good. Only 4 beers and two spliffs. I’m getting old! Day329: Up at 1pm, usual exercise including a long old walk. It included walking along the river (Oundle Mill bridge to the marina) for the fist time this year. The floods are in evidence but, obviously, receded enough to get through - that, or the resulting water, mud and boginess is frozen. I really enjoyed it today but it was freezing - the wind was evil at certain points. Tea’s on the go, beer in hand and I am going to watch War Dogs.  Posh’s game was off today due to a frozen pitch. Day 330: Typing on day 331. It wasn’t a mad Saturday night but mad enough to not be up until gone midday. Another nice long walk, Walk and eat is all I really do nowadays. I can’t even muster any enthusiasm to do housework since I am going to be out of here soon. I called Posh Dave in the evening. It was good to chat and I think he appreciated the call. He’s on his own and struggling, I get the impression. He told me both Matt Baxter (bowel) and Adi Mowles (neck) are undergoing treatment for cancer.
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