#ted lasso finale

[gnnosis]

anyone else feeling real split on how the finale’s gonna go

[k-chips]

Diamond Dogs video chat because not even the Ted Lasso finale can separate these dorks.

No I won’t finish the backgrounds

[richmondsafc]

So a footballer can have two beautiful women but a beautiful woman can’t have two footballers?? Cowards.

[sprqpointintern]

i need them to kiss!

[trentcrimmisgay]

the idea of ted going back to kansas make anyone else really stressed? like he’s going back to henry of course, but also: back to his complicated relationship with his emotionally unavailable mother and his ex wife who left him for their therapist with whom she’s currently in a relationship with? besides henry, what waits for him?

and left behind is a found family full of people who would die for him (sam’s line about this was a joke, but you can’t tell me those himbos wouldn’t kill if not die for ted lasso, rebecca would definitely hire a hit man for ted, and don’t get me started on beard, roy, and trent)? and ADDITIONALLY, since ted mentioned her last episode, i’m assuming he’s still seeing doctor sharon. i’m not up to speed on how this works, but i feel like she’s not able to be his therapist if he goes back (this could be wrong, but if it’s not, then color me concerned, it seems like he still really needs her. where was she was he was hiring a PI to follow his ex wife?)

and if BEARD stays in london? truly, what is waiting for ted on the other side save for henry, a child, who needs his dad to fill his own cup first, and is too young to be any kind of real emotional support to his fragile father.

i trust the writers, truly. so if they convince me this week that ted needs to go back to kansas, alright. but at the moment, i am wary

[narniangirl1994]

I did not like Jamie and Roy being weirdly sexist about Keeley and physically fighting one another over her, only to have no real conclusion to that storyline. First of all, they handled their jealousy over Keeley better in previous seasons when the two of them were rivals and had a lot of growing to do... which makes it seem like they randomly regressed in this episode after they've both matured and become friends. Which is just stupid.

And second of all, the dialogue was so sexist and uncomfortable at times, like Jamie using the video Keeley previously made for him as proof they were meant to be together, when that video is irrelevant to the topic at hand and led to her getting hurt earlier this season (which Jamie is well aware of). It's a gross thing to brag about. Or how Roy thought he had any right to tell Jamie to back off and acted like a one night stand was proof he and Keeley would definitely get back together.

Or how the two guys said they would 'let her' decide which of them she wanted to be with, without an ounce of self awareness about how sexist and presumptuous that was until she kicked them out of her house. But then, that was the end of it. No other conversations or conclusions to that conflict other than some vague background moments with no dialogue that may or may not have been a dream sequence.

What was the point of all the buildup of their intertwined relationships throughout the entire show if the payoff was going to be so... empty and unconcluded?

Don't get me wrong, I don't think any of them should have gotten together this soon, since Roy really needs to work on himself emotionally and Keeley needs to have some time to herself and focus on other areas of her life right now. Jamie is arguably in the best place for a relationship, but wouldn't have a partner ready for him in either (or both) of them right now. And I'm glad at least the stupid fight seemed to spark a realization in Roy that he had more growing to do.

But while I didn't need the three of them to declare their love for each other in the finale, I'm disappointed with the weirdly possessive, jealous behavior from Roy and Jamie as well as the lack of any real resolution, and think all of these characters deserved better after everything they've been through together and the growing they've all done.

[spookynstarbuck]

Not to beat a dead horse but “two middle-aged divorcées find a second chance and true love in one another based on deep friendship and mutual respect, and establish a mixed found family and excellent working relationships” is so much more appealing and original than “white man is the key to fixing everybody’s lives and then he goes back to live in a traditional nuclear family structure in the Midwest.”

[vrag-veshtica]

emotionally spiritually physically mentally supernaturally I'm still here

[trentlassos]

"Trent's dressed like a sunflower" this

"Trent's dressed like a sunflower" that

BY GOD! It's George Bailey's wife on the poster of "It's a Wondeful Life" with a steel chair!!!!!

LISTEN.

Trent's dressed like that in a scene that kicks off a sequence that shows Ted's found family live their lives without him. He's dressed like that when he picks up the manuscript and reads Ted's final note, the one through which he attempts to erase himself from the narrative!

[veryberryjelly]

pumpkin ring

pairing : jamie tartt x reader

🎃 - carving a pumpkin

👻 - " isn't this stuff for kids ? "

𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐦𝐞

halloween was a big deal at nelson road.

but it was an even bigger deal at your house.

every year you hosted a halloween party and today was the day of that party.

you had invited almost the entire team over to your place, including the coaches and rebecca.

not everyone was free, roy and keeled were taking phoebe trick-or-treating, and beard was going to a haunted house with jane, but almost everyone else you invited was now hanging around your house.

a large chunk of the team were hanging around the fire pit in your backyard telling spooky stories over a flashlight, some were lounging around on your sofa just talking.

but there were also a lot of people gathered around your dining table, knives in hand,

guts all over the table,

as you carved into pumpkins.

it had been your idea to get some small pumpkins over to your place for the party for people to carve into, but it had been jamie who helped you lug them through the door and onto the table where they currently rested.

you had always loved carving pumpkins, it was a tradition when you were little and you had continued it on throughout your adult life.

it was nice to share the tradition with your new family.

and you had been sat on the edge of the table working quietly on your pumpkin as the other people around the table chatted and criticised eachother's designs.

"c'mon, mate, what is that supposed to be? " you heard jamie question at the other end of the table, watching as he peered over van damme's shoulder to see what he was carving.

" it's a maple leaf." he defended " i wanted to do something canadian, and i'm sure it's better than the football your carving over there "

" oi, it's not a football - " jamie refuted, picking up his pumpkin to turn it and show the entire table what he had carves. " it's a pair of tits "

you couldnt help the laugh that spilled out of your mouth, along with everyone else's.

" and you thought this stuff was for kids " you pointed out from your place at the table, continuing to keep your design close to your chest.

" i never said that " he argued

" yes you did, when you came to the shop with me to get this stuff. you said ' isn't this stuff for kids? ' when i was choosing the pumpkins. "

the silence that came from jamie only proved you right.

as the night progressed everyone moved around your house, the boys leaving their finished jack-o-lanterns out on your patio with a candle in each of them.

on the end was your design, nothing complicated, but something you had been planning to share with the team at some point and you and jamie had agreed this would be a fun way to do it.

on your pumpkin, you had carved a diamond ring with two words inside it.

' the tartts '

" holy moly- you're engaged ?! " was screeched through your backyard, so loud that you could tell it was dani even from where you and jamie were curled up in the hanging egg chair at the end of your garden.

it was moments before you were both pulled back to the main party and forced to explain how it had happened.

[ceruleanwhore]

In my soul, I feel disgusted and betrayed by this finale and I am shocked that the same writers who were able to give us such a truly wonderful show somehow came up with such a terrible ending for it. This episode directly opposes the very nature of the show more than any other episode in such a way that then calls into question the rest of the series. This episode feels every bit as hollow and sad as Ted himself seems to be throughout the finale and makes me wonder if we ever were actually supposed to believe and to hope at all in the first place, even though I thought that was the point of the series. 

The first of many issues I have with the episode is how they handled Rupert. The whole show is about belief, but specifically believing in others’ capacity for good and ability to change for the better. It’s about believing in redemption and reconciliation, which they actually could have done for Rupert even this late in the show. The scene in episode 10 where we get a glimpse of the inner child that’s still tucked away somewhere inside him showed us that even he still had this potential, up until they did what they did for the finale. While I, personally, tend to be more like Sassy was in that scene — gleefully cheering for the downfall of an odious scoundrel — it felt completely wrong for this show in particular to include that kind of public humiliation, which we the audience are all supposed to be cheering for, and in the middle of Ted’s last game ever with Richmond.

Where we actually could have used a side bit about a scoundrel getting his comeuppance is with Ted’s ex wife and their ex therapist. I think it’s absolutely terrible that they went and set up Rupert’s downfall the way they did while Jake apparently gets off scot free and never gets his license revoked or anything. There also is never really any acknowledgement of just how wrong what he did was, how he should have his license revoked, and how his actions call into question every bit of therapy Ted and Michelle got from him. No one ever questions ‘Oklahoma,’ never mind the entire divorce, relative to this man’s breach of ethics and it bothers me to no end that the most we get is his absence at the end from scenes with Ted, Michelle, and their son. We didn’t need Rupert dressing up like Darth Vader and physically assaulting someone, we needed Michelle realizing how completely wrong her whole relationship with Jake is, dumping him, and reporting him.

The next issue is Ted himself. Obviously, he was in a gloomy sort of mood throughout the whole episode, but I think it’s really important to point out how that didn’t actually clear up once he got home. I do believe he was happy to see his son but, from the plane ride onward, it’s like he’s just hollow. We see him coaching little league soccer for his kid and yet there isn’t any of the heart and soul in it that we’ve seen him put into his other coaching. It’s like he’s depressed, which is understandable because he just left a whole incredible, supportive community to come to Kansas where, like Odysseus at the end of the Oddyssey, he’s a stranger in his own home. He goes from having a whole city around him to support him to seemingly having nothing and not even being a welcome member of his own family since he’s still divorced. Also, as others have pointed out, that montage that seems to be a dream sequence when he’s on the plane ride home is all about him writing himself out of the lives of everyone he just left behind. He’s decided that it’s better for everyone there to just forget about him and move on with their lives as though he was never there and he’s literally dreaming about how happy they’ll be to do that. 

This is a major thematic issue for this series because one of the main points of the series is the idea that everyone can change for the better and, more importantly, just about every character does. Ted spends all that time in England working on his own shit like everyone else, and even gets over his aversion to therapy in order to seek help for the first time ever, just to throw all of that away at the very end because apparently he’s just back on his bs and that’s it. This is where it would maybe be alright if there were another season after this one to address and fix this, but there isn’t. In the very last episode of the whole thing he’s throwing away his entire community, dreaming about how happy they’ll be without him, and there’s nothing and no one there correcting that. To me, this is like if right at the end of the last episode with no room left to fix it, they just had Beard go steal another car and then act like the audience is supposed to be okay with it.

The other thing, going off of that, is how they handled some of the relationships, and I specifically want to start off by talking about Ted and Rebecca. They have the distinction of being the only ship to truly be baited, more than once, and very unnecessarily so. The bait scene at the start of the final episode contributes nothing to the plot, the characters, or their relationship with each other — all it does is mock the members of the audience who were foolish enough to believe they ever could have been together. This, to me, also goes against the core values and themes of the show, because ship baiting like that is inherently mean-spirited and Ted Lasso at its core is meant to be kind. There is nothing kind about essentially dangling something over someone’s head, playing keep away with it, until you finally just chuck it in the river and laugh at the person for being so foolish as to think they were ever going to get it. It’s mean for the sake of being mean and again, for the umpteenth time, it contributes nothing.

So then let’s get to Roy, Jamie, and Keeley. Jamie and Roy are another example of a strong relationship that’s developed beautifully over the course of three seasons regressing at the very end because oh no, people ship it and we can’t have that. I do think that Keeley turning both of them down was necessary but Roy and Jamie literally getting into a fistfight over her was completely unnecessary and detrimental to their individual characters. By this point, they both are mature enough and respect Keeley enough that it’s genuinely ooc for them to be fighting each other about who gets to date her while she’s not even there. Season 3 Jamie and Roy would’ve been leaving the decision to her without reverting back to macho Neanderthal crap. 

To me, this is also about the creators recognizing that people in the fandom have ships and, for whatever reason, feeling the need to try and shut that down rather than just leaving well alone. If, instead of getting in a fight like they did, Roy and Jamie had a conversation about their shared experiences of wanting to be with Keeley but not knowing where they stand with her and recognizing how hard it is for each other, then it could end up contributing to the further growth of their relationship and, along with it, shipping and oh no, we can’t have that. Just like with Avatar: the Last Airbender, the presence or lack of romantic relationships is not the issue here, the problem is with writers accidentally setting up an incredibly compelling ship and then being like “oops, we didn’t mean to do that,” and trying to ctrl z it in the finale, at the detriment of the whole story. Why oh why do writers keep feeling the need to sacrifice the quality of their whole story for the sake of trying to get people to stop having opinions?

So then last up is Ted and Trent. As many others have pointed out, that bit where Ted’s reading the book and makes that comment about the ‘laugh police’ in response to Trent’s excitement and anxiety is extremely out of character. Ted “but he’s our dork” Lasso would never say that and I was horrified to hear those words come out of his mouth. However, this goes in with the destruction of his entire character arc and every bit of growth he’s done throughout the past three seasons all in this one episode, because that was him actively pushing Trent away because, as previously acknowledged, he’s back on his bs.

One issue with this is that Ted then never has a proper goodbye with Trent and the closest thing to that is the note he left asking Trent to change the title of the book. It’s not that I necessarily think he needed individual goodbyes on screen with every other character but Trent in particular was hugely important for Ted, like how Rebecca was. Do you really mean to tell me that Ted wouldn’t actually say goodbye to the journalist who wrote what, coming from him at the time, was essentially a glowing review when he was actually hired with the intention of destroying Ted’s career? Do you mean to say he wouldn’t get a proper goodbye with the man who threw away his whole career over him? The man who then decided the first thing he wanted to do after leaving said career was to write a book about him and his team? Seriously?

The other thing with Trent is that, where Ted’s ex wife and even Rebecca have felt the need to use ‘Oklahoma’ with him to get him to tell the truth, Trent has a talent for discerning the exact truth from Ted regardless of what he does or does not say. It would have been perfectly in character for him to go talk to Ted like Rebecca tried to but then actually succeed where she failed because he would be able to clearly read Ted’s signals and throw that all back at him. Unlike Rebecca, he could directly call out how much Ted didn’t actually want to leave.

That is actually the biggest issue this episode had — cowardice. The only reason I can think of why they wouldn’t even consider doing something like what I just described is because, like with Roy and Jamie, they are perfectly aware of the chemistry between those characters and how they have set them up so it reads like they’re in love with each other, and a scene like this would be just about impossible to do without coming across as romantic. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Ted and Trent would’ve already been snogging by the start of the season if one of them were a woman. This show did the thing where they’ve decided that they can have a couple gay characters, but those characters can only get with specifically devised side characters because God forbid you just have your two existing characters of the same gender kiss a bit. Between the pairings of Ted and Trent, and Roy and Jamie, there is enough textual evidence of mutual attraction and the potential for real, romantic relationships that one could write over a hundred pages about it, and that is not an exaggeration. When I look at this finale, one of the things I see is the titular character being destroyed because they decided that was better than letting people think that he could maybe not be straight.

The last issue I have here is that there really were no goodbyes. Rebecca showed up at the airport and that’s it and I thought that was very weird and, again, very much not in accordance with the entire rest of the show. Even if they didn’t have the entire team show up at the airport to say goodbye, it didn’t make sense to not even have just the Diamond Dogs show up for that. Where tf was everyone? Because just from watching the whole rest of the show, I think it would be impossible not to expect the team, the dogs, the folks from the pub and maybe also Shannon from town. It was a cold, empty departure far from fitting for the show at all and it left me coming out of that finale feeling cold and empty from the crippling disappointment. They had a whole show centered around interpersonal relationships and support and then had the coldest, loneliest ending anyone there could have devised.

My final thought here is that this is not an ending and the only way to salvage this wreckage is with another season. This feels like something they’re doing to drum up attention and interaction so that it’ll be successful when they do come in and announce that they’ve changed their minds and there will be another season, like an encore at a concert. However, if this really is the end, then I am absolutely disgusted and feel very betrayed right now because this show told me to believe and taught me that maybe hope isn’t actually a bad thing that’s out to get me, just to turn around and crap all over that. This show didn’t just apparently waste hours of my time, it was actually helping to get me to move on from past pain and start to accept hope as a good thing, until it shattered mine. They desecrated the very art they created and then expected the audience to applaud such disrespectful destruction, and I am disgusted by it.

[sprqpointintern]

ot3 or bust, that's all i'm saying

[ultralightpoe]

Bejeweled - Jamie Tartt

Authors Note: I have been trying to find any sort of energy to post and get out of bed. Got so close to giving up on life itself and I'm barely back, please bare with me as I try to find my way out of my depression hole I have dug for myself everyone. I know it's been a minute but life has been kicking my ass. Be patient with me - Ultralight

Word Count: 4454

Warnings: i dont think any

Apart of my MIDNIGHTS EVENT. (Next Event is Sour by Olivia Rodrigo. Requests closed. Event following yet to be decided)

SOUR EVENT

MAIN MASTERLIST

Enjoy!

Baby love, I think I've been a little too kind

Didn't notice you walking all over my peace of mind

In the shoes I gave you as a present

Puttin' someone first only works when you're in their top five

And by the way, I'm going out tonight

Diamonds can dull if not taken care of properly, they can accumulate dust and grime, the shine from the gem being lost amongst the age of the years. You were raised by a grandmother that taught you the most important thing a little girl could know, never ever EVER let a man dull your shine.  

She would lecture you on this as she showed you her jewelry collection, showing you all seven of her engagement rings through the years. The first had been a diamond pear cut with a silver band, given to her by the young salesman that had promised her the world from his office on wall street.

She packed her bags and took the ring the day he slept with his receptionist.

You would wear the diamond ring 10 years later when you met Jamie Tartt, and oddly enough you would be wearing it the day you found out he was cheating. 

-

Maybe it was your fault. Maybe Jamie had strayed from your bed because of you. 

Not because you were bored in bed or because you didn’t give him enough attention, no. Maybe you gave him TOO much attention, you let him forget who you were. You were a fucking diamond.

Diamond of the season as Bridgerton would say. 

You always kept your lovers on a leash, and when they strayed you proved to them just what they would be missing, but you had trusted Jamie as stupid as that was. You had been waiting for an engagement ring, getting your nails done religiously just in case you needed to take a picture. 

You stared at your nails now, as you scrolled through the twitter feed, seeing him leave her flat with lipstick on his cheek and his shirt still unbuttoned. 

Your grandmother would be so disappointed in you. You were better than this. 

And you would be. 

But you had to play your cards right. If Jamie Tartt thinks he can get away with screwing over a gem like yourself then you would just have to show him what a fool he was, and that began with a smile. 

You smiled at him when he came home, all dolled up as he lit up at the sight of you, making it seem like you hadn’t been waiting at the stairs for the sound of his keys and just naturally caught him on your way out. 

“Y/n? Love? Where are you headin’?” He asks, moving closer to you for a kiss. You kissed him back easily, this would only work if he didn’t know that you knew. 

“Just to the club with some friends.” You smile, giving him a twirl in your short dress. 

“What friends?” He mumbles casually, far too casually as his eyes roamed over you slowly. You knew his game and you knew that his casual act was far from the truth, inside he was panicking about you going out in this.

“Oh, just Brent and Jordan.” You shrug, leaning in to kiss his cheek before disappearing from sight. 

-

“You’re new here.” The stranger smiles cheekily at you as he walks up, admiring you without a second of hesitation, not even bothering to hide his eyes drifting to your chest. “I would recognize a beauty like ya’.”

“Oh I am sure you say that to all the girls.” You smile, giving him an airy look you knew would hook him quickly. It works, he gives you a lopsided grin that tells you he is ready to play your game. 

“Who’re your bodyguards over there?”  He nods his head to the direction of your friends Brent and Jordon, both of which you had been flirting with all night. 

“Oh, just some friends.”

“They don’t look like friends.”

“What’s it to you?” And there it is, the jealous look in his eyes that tells you the sex is going to be good. Hook…..Line……

“What are ya’ drinkin, lovey?” 

“Whatever you buy me.” You giggle, moving your hand to touch his elbow expertly, keeping your touch light and your smile easy. 

He blushes a bit at it, moving to the stool across from you and holding his hand out. “Your name?”

“Y/n. Yours.”

“I’m Jamie fucking Tartt.” His voice is smug, and his eyes are gleaming. This poor fool had no idea what he just got himself into. 

“And what can you do for me, Jamie?”

“I thought the sayin’ was what can I do for you?”

“Why would I ask that when I already know I can give everything.” And sinker. 

-

Best believe I'm still bejeweled

When I walk in the room

I can still make the whole place shimmer

And when I meet the band

They ask, "Do you have a man?"

I can still say, "I don't remember"

Familiarity breeds contempt

Don't put me in the basement

When I want the penthouse of your heart

Diamonds in my eyes

I polish up real, I polish up real nice

She let you try on the second engagement ring when your fingers were still too tiny to actually keep it on, laughing when you’re young eyes widened as it sparkled in front of you, amazed by the piece even if you were too young to truly understand what it meant. 

She told you the story of the second man that proposed to her, the one that owned his own business in London which is the reason she moved there in the first place, she told you how he whisked her away and how she ended up moving in with him after a month of knowing him. The way she described his apartment was nothing but luxury and the emerald necklace she showed you that went with the ring screamed money. 

You would learn the term blood money later in life. 

But then she told you about his actual wife, the one he let live in the mansion nestled in the countryside that he never spoke of while he hid mistresses away in apartments along the city promising to marry them while he bestowed jewels to them. 

She wore the ring and the necklace the day she left him, having his valet back all her suitcases into a car and driving her to the far side of the city where her one and only friend in London lived. 

You wore the set on your third date with Jamie, and then you wore it again the day he embarrassed you. 

-

The necklace and ring paired nicely with the gala gown that Rebecca and Keeley helped you pick out, both girls fawning over you the second they saw you show up to the event. 

“You look right fucking fit!” Keeley gushes, eyeing you up and down as Rebecca smiles. “A gorgeous color, and that necklace is absolutely stunning.”

“You should see the ring.” You smile, holding up your hand and letting them gawk. “Famly heirlooms darlings.”

“I don’t know if I want you or I want to be with you.” Keeley whispers, “you made my lower parts like throb-”

“Keeley!” Rebecca gasps, a laugh tearing from all three of you before a hand nestles itself on your hip. 

“Let’s head to our seats, ye love?” Jamie asks, pulling you away before you could actually answer. You were a bit irritated with him, ever since finding out he cheated a week ago you found yourself sick to look at him. 

And he hadn’t complimented you once this evening. Fucking fool. 

But you kept your mouth shut, this was the long game here. You smiled at him, and let him know how handsome he was. It would all be worth it. 

You kept reminding yourself of this during the auction, watching dozens of women bid on Danny Rojas as Keeley motioned for you to look at your phone. You ignore her at first, until she gets Roy to do it as well and you finally give in. 

K; See that goddess in the corner? Blue dress with the massive tits?

Y; Could have just said blue dress

K; She is Jamie’s date

Y; But I’m Jamie’s date

K; So is she. 

Game. Fucking. On. 

You risk one more look to the girl as Jamie is called up, allowing him to kiss your cheek quickly before waltzing himself up and standing proudly as the bidding starts. 

You let her bid back and forth with the girl in the yellow dress towards the front, wondering if yellow dress was another date of his as he gives you an odd look from the stage, drinking your champagne easily. When he gets back you catch a whiff of his cologne, the one you bought him for christmas, while he leans in. 

“Why didn’t ye bid on me, love?”

“Figured I would give another lucky lady some time with you.” You smile, leaning to rub his shoulder. He nods happily, enjoying your answer while your mind flashes back to the photos of him coming out of her apartment. 

He couldn’t even bother wiping off her lipstick from his lips and cheek. 

So when Sam goes up you raise your hand, meeting Jamie’s eyes with that same airy smile you gave him when you met, calling out “2,000 pounds”

And the look on Jamie’s face makes the moment so fucking worth it.

-

“Jesus fuckin’ Christ-” Jamie blurts when he walks up to your door, eyes widening as a red tint covers his neck and cheeks. “Fuck- sorry- lords name in vain and all that but I think I might just die a happy bloke right here.”

“It’s not too much?” You ask, smoothing out the sides as you try to relax your racing heart. This was the first time you were nervous for a date, this was the first time you actually wanted the date to go somewhere because Jamie Tartt was one hell of a man. 

He was sweet and caring, he held doors open for you and talked to you about football with so much passion your heart burned……and he was a god in bed. 

“Never too much, you’re like a fuckin’ Aphrodite brought to life.” He mumbles, eyes never leaving yours as he holds out his arm for you to grab onto. You admire his look then, placing your hand in the crook of his elbow as your gaze travels the tux he wore.

For a brief moment you find yourself excited at the fact that his tie matched your dress perfectly without the two of you planning it in advance. Like an omen that you were meant to be, and you can’t help but thinking that your grandmother would laugh at that statement. 

She wasn’t here, and you were too busy smiling as Jamie led you to the restaurant like you were a princess. 

-

Baby boy, I think I've been too good of a girl (too good of a girl)

Did all the extra credit, then got graded on a curve

I think it's time to teach some lessons

I made you my world (huh), have you heard? (Huh)

I can reclaim the land

And I miss you (I miss you)

But I miss sparkling (ah, hey)

The oval cut Garnet ring with the silver band came next, from the artist she met in that small apartment building. He drew her millions of times, filling his sketchbook with her dancing and posing until he was able to draw her out of memory. 

He pawned his fathers pocket watch for the ring, proposing to her in the middle of lovemaking as he demanded the stars pay her what they owe her. But then he disappeared, stopped coming home and she couldn’t find him. 

Just when she had begun wondering if he was cheating the police had knocked on the door asking if she had seen him. Turned out the pocket watch he pawned wasn’t his but his bosses, as well as the 4,000 he had stolen from the safe the same night he stole the watch. 

She told the police she was house sitting for him, and the second they were out of sight she packed and bolted with the ring. 

You wore it the night you first said I love you, and again when told him your biggest lie. 

- 

“Oh you should have seen it, Y/n. Fuckin’ Nate had no words. We all gave him one hell of a show, glarin and just being downright nasty on the field.” Jamie brags, pacing back and forth in your kitchen as you wiped down the counters for something to do while he rambled on. 

Normally you would be hanging on to his every word, asking about it and actually giving a shit. But today? All you could think about was her. 

Was the women in the blue dress the women from the apartment? Or were they different? How many women were there? How long has he been doing this? A month, a week or years? Should you get tested for anything?

“-oy, you okay?” Jamie asks, concern laced across his face as he comes up to rub you back carefully, bending down to look in your eyes. 

“I’m fine,” You lie, nodding quickly. “Just a little sick.”

“Let’s get you to bed, yeah?” You let him, enjoying the caring side of him as he tucks you in and puts a glass of water beside your bed. He sits beside you for a moment, rubbing your cheek carefully as he watches you. “I’ll be in the living room. You’ll call me if ya need me, ya?”

“Yeah.” You nod, closing your eyes gently as he leans down to kiss your forehead, hating the way your heartbeat through your chest. 

“I love you.” He whispers. 

“I love you too.” You whisper back, feeling sick at how empty the words were, and how easy the lie slipped from your lips. 

- 

You hadn’t planned on saying it to him that night, the dizziness of it all just got the best of you. 

Jamie had snuck you into the richmond field in the middle of the night, both of you laughing and slipping in the wet grass as you tried to play a crappy game of soccer. 

Sure your outfit was ruined but you had been smiling so much your cheeks hurt, ribs aching from laughing too much and your heart 2 seconds from exploding every time he touched you. 

By the time you both tire out, him swinging his arm around your shoulders and snatching the ball up easily while trying to catch his breath, he leads you out to the parking lot. It’s there you say it, in the dimness of the broken light, your cheeks heated from nervousness as well as the workout. 

“I think I love you.” You blurt, watching him stop quickly, whipping to look at you with wide eyes. “No. I do. I know I love you.”

A moment of silence follows and you begin to think you’ve blown it, getting ready to rush off out of pure embarrassment, when a smile cracks out on his face and he rushes forwards to kiss you passionately. 

“I love you too.” He murmurs as he cradles your jaw, lips grazing your own. 

- 

Best believe I'm still bejeweled

When I walk in the room

I can still make the whole place shimmer

And when I meet the band

They ask, "Do you have a man?"

I can still say, "I don't remember"

The factory worker with the easy smile came next, and after 4 months of dating he popped out a black diamond ring with a black band on it, the darkest in the collection which should have shown what was too come. 

She never liked to talk about that one often, and she never let you touch it, as if the ring itself could ruin your life in an instant. 

And you truly believed it could. 

All you knew from that time in her life was that she left bloodied and battered, leaving during the day while he was at work, where she would head to a co workers flat waiting for him when he got home and trying not to cry as he cleaned the cuts. A week later she would take the pregnancy test, that was all you needed to know. 

The ring sat in the red velvet box your grandmother had put it in when she took it off, and it would stay in that box where you would not see it. Except for the two times it nearly escaped. 

- 

“Hey Y/n?” Jamie calls from the room down the hall, drawing your attention from the project you had been working on as you wait for him to keep going, when he doesn’t you sigh out and stand to go find where he was summoning you. 

“Yes?”

“Have you seen my lucky knee pad?”

“Shouldn’t they be in your bag?” You ask, moving to check the said bag where he had laid it in your shared bed. The zipper moved easily as you began searching throughout it. 

“Do you think I would be searching the room if it was in there?” He snaps, and as he swings to glare at you his hand hits the jewelry box on your dresser, sending it tumbling down and the cap of the cursed velvet box flying, the ring sliding across the floor right in front of your foot. 

You stare at it like it’s a bomb, breathing heavy as it gleams up at you. Jamie watches for a moment before he sighs out. “Just pick it up will ya? Won’t bloody hurt you.”

You roll your eyes, ignoring the comment and turning back to the bag where you pull out the lucky knee pad, making him groan. “I swear it wasn’t there when I checked.”

“Just pick up the mess you made.” You grunt out, putting the knee pad on top of the bag and rushing out of the room to go shower. 

- 

The day you move in with Jamie is spent with cheap dancing music that makes you both laugh and dozens of boxes to unpack. Instead of tag teaming your shared boxes in your new shared apartment you both decide to do one box at a time, working as a team. 

Because why be efficient when you are in love?

By the time he gets to the box holding your jewelry he spots the velvet box, reaching in and pulling it out before you notice. By the time you turn to see he already has the lid fully off and the ring pinched between his thumb and forefinger. 

“I don’t think I have ever seen a black diamond.” He murmurs, holding it up to the light as you chuck a pillow at his face. It hits him square on and he gives you an incredulous look as you begin pointing at the ring. 

“Put that thing back in the box, hide it deep in the jewelry box and go wash your hands!” You order, making him blink in shock before he does as told, coming back with wet hands and a small smile. 

“I know it sounds crazy but-”

“I have superstitions too.” He shrugs, moving closer to kiss you softly. “That ring was fucking ugly anyways.”

- 

Familiarity breeds contempt

Don't put me in the basement

When I want the penthouse of your heart

Diamonds in my eyes

I polish up real, I polish up real nice

The pink diamond came from a mistake she wasn’t willing to admit. 

Moments of panic and loneliness have a way of making humans confuse many things for love, she had shown up bruised and broken and she thought her coworker had mended her. 

He was kind, and he was gentle. They got along well and he was very supportive of her keeping the child in the pregnancy. He was safe…..but they weren’t in love. 

She tells you of the conversation she had with him, 3 months pregnant and wearing an engagement ring. They talked about how they went too fast, she told him she wanted to be a mother first and foremost. 

They said goodbye, he told her she could keep the ring. 

He would later be the baby's godfather, and he visited every christmas. 

There were two christmases that actually mattered. 

- 

Jamie missed Christmas dinner with your family that year, not that you minded since all you had been silently hoping for was a break. Just a little longer…. You reminded yourself. The long game. 

But as you marched up the path to your parents home you found yourself breathing out a sigh of relief, home. Home was right here and you would be safe to show your pain. 

Your great uncle is the first to notice said pain, nodding you over to talk to you. 

“You’re grandmother raised you right,” He tells you. “And if she were here she would not let you stand to be in pain.”

“I know.” You mumble back, nodding your head quickly. “I’m working on it.”

- 

The year you brought Jamie home for Christmas was a year full of chaos, one where you had been rushing around in a panic, nervous and anxious about your family not liking him. And it had all gone wrong so far. 

The ham was burnt and the tree managed to catch on fire. Both your bags had been lost in transit so you both were forced into the ugliest sweaters you had seen and you thought Jamie would bolt. 

But he merely grabs your hands softly to stop your pacing, kissing your knuckles and peering up at you. “We’ll be alright, yeah?”

“Yeah.” You nod, smiling back at him as your great uncle walks in, giving you a nod of approval when Jamie can’t see. You ease up then, you had nothing to worry about, Jamie would win them over no problem. 

- 

Sapphire tears on my face

Sadness became my whole sky

But some guy said my aura's moonstone

Just 'cause he was high

The 6th ring had been a simple silver band given to her by the neighbor that claimed she was aphrodite reborn. They had talked 3 times before he gave her the ring and though it never actually counted as a proposal she claimed it did since he had said “I’ll get you the diamond when I prove to you we’re meant to be.”

He lost interest after 3 weeks, she didn’t mind. 

You always used to wear the band when you wanted a good laugh, but as of recently you couldn’t find any humor in it as you left it in the box.  You were beginning to lose energy for all happiness in general. 

- 

And we're dancin' all night

And you can try to change my mind

But you might have to wait in line

What's a girl gonna do?

A diamond's gotta shine

The seventh and final engagement ring had been given to her by a nervous accountant who acted like she had torn the stars from the sky. He was a shy and nervous man, blushed everytime she looked at him, but there had been a spark like no other.  This would be the first ring she would accept with her future planned out, no way of living without him. This had been her lovematch. 

It had been sapphire, her birthstone. She had worn it for three months. 

You wore it the day you met his mistress. 

- 

The apartment was quite nice, and as you took a look around you couldn’t help the anxiety that built through you as she watched you from the couch. 

“He told me he was leaving you.”

“Of course he did.”

“He said neither of you were happy.”

“Not anymore.” You smile, everything in you easing. “But it’s almost over.”

 - 

Best believe I'm still bejeweled

When I walk in the room

I can still make the whole place shimmer (shimmer)

And when I meet the band

They ask, "Do you have a man?"

The last and final ring in the collection hadn’t been an engagement ring, rather a wedding ring. Your grandmother had worn it since the day she got it to the day she died, passing it down to you.  A simple pearl ring that stopped your breath short every time. 

She wore it the day she gave birth to your mother, claiming it gave her strength. She wore it the day of your grandfather's funeral and your mothers as well. 

You wore it the day of her funeral and had been saving it ever since. This would be the ring you wore the day you decided to leave him. 

You waited up, your biggest mistake of it all since you already knew he wouldn’t be home for awhile. 

He would claim it was the game, you would know the truth, he would not feel bad about lying to your face. 

You twisted your grandmother's ring on your finger. It was time. 

 - 

I can still say, "I don't remember"

Familiarity breeds contempt

Don't put me in the basement

When I want the penthouse of your heart

Diamonds in my eyes

I polish up real (nice), I polish up real nice

He proposed with a ruby ring, after years of waiting and it finally happened. You took the ring, kissed him softly and a week later you left a letter on the table explaining it all as you left. You took your clothes and jewelry with you, leaving the pain behind with him. 

You were a fucking jewel, this he would not forget

- . 

And we're dancin' all night

And you can try to change my mind

But you might have to wait in line

What's a girl gonna do? What's a girl gonna do?

I polish up nice

Best believe I'm still bejeweled

When I walk in the room

I can still make the whole place shimmer

You wore your grandmother's wedding pearl wedding ring on your left hand the day you gave birth, and on your right held the engagement ring Jamie had given you. 

When your daughter was old enough you would show her your collection, telling her your grandmother's history all the way up to the ruby ring, where you would tell your own story, all the while wearing the ring you bought yourself, with the dahlia diamond. 

You were a jewel, and just as your grandmother taught you…..never ever EVER let a man dull your shine.

[gnnosis]

it’s a sad song. but we sing it anyway.

[ the anthropocene reviewed, animated / “permanent,” the milk carton kids / richard siken / the good place 4x12 / the raven king, maggie stiefvater / hadestown (2017) / ted lasso 3x12 / elsa beskow / “no complaints,” noah kahan / angels in america ]

[k-chips]

Look who’s here! Diamond Dogs but make them smol

I really want to make stickers of these! I could even sell it, idk but it would be cool!

((My inability to draw chibis is showing))

Edit:

And the stickers are here!!!

You can buy them on TeePublic!

http://tee.pub/lic/ar-zZ9xmj04

[spookynstarbuck]

I’m like, genuinely so sad about that ending. Why spend so much time gaining the trust of your audience in regards to ensuring that you will treat your characters with love and kindness, only to do such a disservice to so many of them? Why make a show whose entire premise is based on relationships and character development, only to undo so much of it in the last ten minutes? Why start your show with a character being asked to leave by his ex-wife, only to end up ignoring the pleas to stay from someone who loves him? Why establish a home and found family, and a solution to include his son in this new life, just to undo all of it?

Why have your female lead whose journey has been in part about deeply yearning for a meaningful “thunder and lightning” romantic relationship end up with a nameless character with no discernible personality that has 5-10 minutes of screen time in one episode halfway through the last season? Why center season 3 on the development of Jamie and his relationship w Roy only to have them get into a physical fight over a girl, whom neither of them ends up with definitively anyways? Why have him make that gross and mean comment about the leaked video? Why show him building a new friendship w Keely only to reveal that he actually is still trying to fuck her?

I get the idea of Ted being a Mary Poppins, but that doesn’t work so well when many of the characters don’t really get happy endings, and he returns to a life without a majority of the relationships that have been the center of the show being intact. Also, this concept is undermined by the fact that he did not have to leave! Mary Poppins leaves bc she is a magical being and she has to! A completely feasible solution was offered to Ted to stay and he didn’t even consider it. Also, why did he seem so hollow and checked out for so much of the episode? His lack of emotional response to any of his goodbyes felt so strange. Also, he wasn’t even at Beard’s shitty green screen wedding? Also, Beard left Ted to marry his lowkey abusive girlfriend?

And WHY bring Nora Ephron and soulmates into all of it for exactly zero payoff? You don’t get to say “rom-communism” and not have one single well-explored and established romantic journey with a happy ending. The magic of Nora Ephron is that soulmates are real and endings are happy; that when she shows you two people are meant for each other, that is exactly what you can expect to see. So like, literally why bother bringing those concepts into this show and highlighting them so often only to completely abandon them?