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#tell me how you really feel or gtfo
astrologydayz · 11 months
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ASTROLOGY FUCKING NOTES2🖤💀
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Nobody really knows a person with a 12th House Sun🤔🤔. They hide themselves really well, & project themselves as someone they're truly not. They don't do it on purpose, they're just so fucking private. My brother actually has this placement, and we're practically twins, but I still feel like I don't know him, AT ALL. They hide themselves, because they're afraid that their true selves won't be "enough"/won't be "liked". BUT OFC IT WILL, & IF NOT, THEN FUCK THEM, BABE.
MOON CONJUNCT/SQUARE SATURN people can hate being alone 4 the first two decades of their lives, but later learn 2 be their own best friend, & love it. They "mother themselves 2 life/back2life". They learned the hard way, that everything is better when u don't put your faith in just anybody. They also learned not 2 trust from a young age, because of their mother/father or both parents💀💔.
I've seen people say "that u can choose not to access that specific energy in your chart, if you don't want 2"🤣. Like u can choose 2 get a million dollars tmrw?, IF YOU WANT 2?🤣 come on. Natal charts are a tool 2 c who u are, why you developed that way/what “happens in your life”, and why you're here with the help of astrology. No matter the aspect, it will be present at some point. A chart never lies🔮🤷‍♀️.
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MOON SQUARE/QUINCUNX VENUS IN A MAN'S NATAL CHART tells us that he finds it hard 2 understand women. He has "problems" when it comes 2 feminine energies, &with the women he's surrounding himself with🤔. He can have a hate/love relationship 2/with women💋.
VENUS CONJUNCT/TRINE/QUINTILE MONY ASTEROID - 7782) IN SYNASTRY, will cause the asteroid person 2 provide the Venus person with a lot of material gifts👠🛍💄.
IDK why anybody would say that your MC has NOTHING to do with how u look/how people see u! Lol okay. My mentor must have been on drugs when she was taught everything + in all those 43 years she's been in practice then. gtfo. Let me give u an example. 👇🏼
I’ll just tell you everything I see with this aspect.
Kim K = Venus in Virgo in 9th house at 19 degrees - Libra degree) conjunct her MC in Virgo at 28 degrees - cancer degree). She's famous 4 her beautiful looks/people finding her beautiful. she always does things to look "YOUNGER, cosmetic procedures etc. 2 take years off! Growing a big following worldwide of young people looking up 2 her/her being idolized by them. Famous 4 being beautiful/4modelling/fashion/cosmetics - being in Venusian businesses/4 who she dates. she also takes after her MOM, with her looks!!! I know her mom was/is also her manager, & I would include this here, cuz u can actually see that, but I would have to go into details again. Idk if u would find that boring?? as I already wrote a lot. Thanks for making it this far😂.
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ASTEROID MEMORIA (1247) IN SYNASTRY can tell u why u feel like you’ve met the other person before, or what memories that r the most "memorable" with the other person🧡🪐🔮.
ASTEROID FANATICA - 1589) IN SYNASTRY tells u what really fascinates u about the other person/what u can become obsessed with, when it comes 2 the other person❕
IF U HAVE A SYNASTRY ASPECT/OR ASPECTS with someone, and u also have it in your natal chart = a very important person you're dealing with! They'll teach u whatever the aspect is/aspects are! And they're meant 2 be the one who teaches it 2u/ or meant 2 be the one who makes that aspect exist in your life. (good or bad).
VENUS OPPOSITE VERTEX/CONJUNCT ANTI-VERTEX IN SYNASTRY is co cute🥹, Vertex let Venus in2 their "private world". Venus is usually not the type Vertex person goes 4, but they’re mesmerised anyway!! “There’s just something unreal about Venus”.
KARMA ASTEROID - 3811) can tell you about your karma! Old karma/Karma you're creating etc. U can use it in in any chart u want2, natal charts, synastry charts, composite charts, Davidson Charts, solar return charts, lunar return charts, progressed charts, ANY CHART U WANT2 BABE!!🪐🤛💥🪐⛅☀🌊.
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BLACK MOON LILITH SQUARE/QUINCUNX ASC in a WOMAN'S CHART can show problems with both genders. She can feel left out, not apart of "the group", when it comes to women. And with men = men always trying to run up on her/trying her boundaries, &they're provocative af. People can't handle her here. She will not conform to anyone. She can feel pretty fucking alone in the way she goes about her day to day life. feeling like nobody will ever understand the struggles she has/the pain she's going around with. The key here is acceptance of ones self. She cannot change herself for others sake, she will never be happy. She'll be happy when she chooses herself, & the right people will flock 2 her, right after. They'll See her light, &will not put who she is down, but CELEBRATE. It can also be the complete opposite. She can be a people pleaser, & has internal fights with herself, every day about this. Trying 2 fit in with groups, dating men who's crossing her boundaries, all the time. She either fights people, or she fights herself. SHE HAS 2 STAY TRUE2HERSELF! There will always be people hating on her, no matter how she moves. FUCK THEM. People who are meant 2 be in her life will CELEBRATE HER!! Not put who she is down/make her change. People who can't understand her = she needs2 get them the fuck out.
NEPTUNE CONJUNCT ASC can show a person living in their own "delulu world". They're not really "there" - can be seen as the "dumb blonde". Neptune can cloud their mind, every single day. They're "different"/they change all the time. They can't really be "real" with people. Trying 2 always be friends with everyone, not really having their own opinions, following the pack etc. They can 100% people please.
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VALENTINE/AMOR/ 447) - 1221) CONJUNCT MC - They "look like love", &they also project it out. People think they're beautiful. But remember, even tho people know/c them like that = doesn't mean that they're really like that. That's just what they show off/how they're "known" in the eyes of the public/in their career/their surroundings💜.
SUN MAKING AN "EASY" ASPECT2 MOON does not mean that your parents like each other. I have this, and my parents literally can't stand each other. I've seen this more times than I can count. It's about your conscious ego&how you emotionally feel about the way u express yourself/with the way u "show your ego off" - "yin&Yang duality".
I HATE MOON SQUARE URANUS IN SYNASTRYYYYY. Uranus will pop in&out of the other person's life, as they desire2. The Moon person needs support&a feeling of being safe, &Uranus wants other things/aka not worried about the Moon person - Uranus is erratic. WHO GOT TIME4THAT?
MERCURY OPPOSITE NEPTUNE can show us a person being pretty good at lying/coming up with lies easily/Quickly. Having no problems with finding "excuses" 4 what they say/do, &can get other people in on it, 2 lie for them as well. It happens in periods tho, like on & off periods.
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Asteroids I always look at first: Nemesis - 128) Amor - 1221), Valentine - 447), Alma - 390), Destiny - 6583), Moira - 638), Eros - 433), Karma - 3811), Kama - 1387), Close - 54902), Apollo - 1862), Child - 4580), Compassion - 8990), Angel - 11911), Yes - 7707), Boda - 1487), DNA - 55555), Fast - 27719), Prey - 6157), Not - 2857), Casanova - 7328), Fox - 16248), Savage - 29837), Pholus - 5145), Fanatica - 1589), Priapus - h22), Sado - 118230), Medea - 212), Nessus - 7066), Dejanira - 157), Hazard - 9305), Mentor - 3451), Lysistrata - 897), Bilk - 4425 - using the other person 4 own material gain).
THANKS4READING BEAUTIFUL❤️🍒 Appreciate u, always.
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f14fun · 2 months
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pixelated love (!simmer x mv1) - chapter 6
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synopsis: in which the famous three time world champion max verstappen wants to learn how to play the sims 4. except, he doesn't really know how to. so what does he do, search up a youtube tutorial. low-and-behold, y/n's video is the first he watches.
smau ✮ ⋆ ˚。𖦹 ⋆。°✩ profile | masterlist ⋆.˚✮🎧✮˚.⋆ prev | next | series index ˚୨୧⋆。
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yourusername
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liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 187,306 others
yourusername: living out my best sugar baby life thanks to @/maxverstappen 1 😈😈 ty schatze ❤️💦🤤
view comments:
maxverstappen1: You're welcome mein leibling ❤️
user1: BYE what alternate reality joke thingie have i stumbled upon🧍🏻🧍🏻🧍🏻
user2: i feel lost, confused, and BETRAYEDDD
user3: she got that million dollar baby life coming her wayy 🤑🤑💸
user4: chat... i fear that the flirting... erm... m-m-may not be a joke anymore
yourusername: hmmm... maybe not... do you agree?? senpai-san? 🥹🥹🥹
maxverstappen1: GTFO my face with that bullshit.
user5: deffo still friends (that fuck) BUT FRIENDS. 😭😭
user6: BYEEEE 😢😓
landonorris: Well well well... aren't YOU the reason why Max is "booked out" for the next week.
landonorris: YOU TRAITOR 😡😡😡
yourusername: @/maxverstappen go tell your girlfriend, that i'm your girlfriend
user7: WHAT?
user8: ???? I AM CONFUSION
maxverstappen1: Now Y/n, what did we say about quoting pop culture references/song lyrics to me...
yourusername: 😢😢😢 i'm super duper sworry
maxverstappen1: @/landonorris GTFO 🚪
landonorris: WHAT WHAT WHAT???
landonorris: I'm just friends with a big bunch of traitors 😓
georgerussell63: Wtf mate??
oscarpiastri: Hello?? So mean Lando... Not chill at all 😞
user9: BACKTRACK?? IS SHE FR DATING MAX???
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taglist: @hiireadstuff @sinofwriting @mehrmonga @the-untamed-soul @glai1023-blog @loloekie @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @sheastri @llando4norris @gwginnyweasley @carmenita122 @ririyulife @pausmoon @ur-fav-ave @eveninggstar @maddie-naps @erin-odonnell04 @rexit-mo @ems-alexandra @si1ver06 @iamred-iamyellow @bibissparkles @percypie @formula1blog @lanadelray1989 @rylieverstappen-sargent @luvsforme @eiaaasamantha @kaysmiles42 @mvaldez7821 @stinkyjax @sweate-r-weathe-r @laneyspaulding19 @mingyusbigrighttoe
some of these didn't get tagged, and i'm having trouble (?) it's being very weird, idk, so please let me know if your name is here and it didn't tag you ❣️
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author's note: ty guys for reading this fic! 😍🫶🏾
pls let me know if this chapter was funny, i'm feeling extremely unfunny these days y'all's (ik right, impossible 🤡🤡😞) just because i've been burdened with the task of *unfortunately* summer school
soon, all the next published parts will be published on a schedule, and i won't really be able to add anyone to the taglist for two-ish weeks
comment if you want to be added to the taglist! ⋆.˚✮🎧✮˚.⋆
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trashmouth-richie · 1 year
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Eddie x Fem!reader
master list
summary: feelings burst. Fluffy. Fluffy fluffy. Eddie helps reader when she finds herself in a bind.
warnings: no minors gtfo- eventual smut in the series.
W.C: 11.8k 🫣
A/N: per usual thank you the my beta readers @sweetsweetjellybean
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//
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Clunk
Clunk clunk humm
You were already late for work this morning and now this? Must be a fucking Monday. This must be that bitch karma’s payback for you talking shit about Eddie’s van the other night when he backed it up to the garage to unload some shit he salvaged from the junkyard.
“You would think that since you’re a mechanic, you could tune up that piece of shit so it isn’t so fucking loud.”
Eddie scoffs and rolls his eyes, unloading another arm load of car parts from the back of the van to the middle of the garage, “don’t dog on the shaggin’ wagon, you know how much ass I get in this thing?”
The unspoken agreement you had with Eddie the other night after spilling your guts about your past, gave you more patience towards him than ever before. Instead of finding him repulsive, you two were almost friends.
“No I don’t and also I don’t care.” you say taking a bite of a ham sandwich.
“More than a public toilet seat,” Eddie boasts, “Ladies love it, feel like I’m Shaggy or something.”
More like his other four-legged snack-loving friend.
“I really hope you use a rubber, don’t wanna extend the Munson blood line anymore than you have to,” you bite back.
“Oh sweetheart, I always wrap it with the groupies, especially watching Jas bounce from Gareth, to Big D to Walt all in one night.”
“Well look at you, Mr. Perfect bill of health.”
Eddie smiles widely a stupid grin plastered on his face, “I’m so good at the doctors they even give me a sticker. ”
-
Now here you are, stranded at the gas station east of town, past Merrill’s pumpkin patch. Losing all faith in your sanity, you slam your hand into the steering wheel one more time. Your chunky boots clunk across the pavement as you pull the door towards you, a dingy brass bell dings overhead, alerting the gas station attendant that someone has entered the store.
“Back again?” the balding creep with the greasy combover presses. His coke bottle thick glasses full of breakfast pizza slime from his fingers from pushing them up on in place after sliding down the oils on his nose. A brown paper bag with orange spray paint sitting next to it sat on the counter, and a tinge of orange around his mouth.
With no time for small talk or shooting the shit with the local bachelors of Hawkins, you simply need to borrow the phone and call… fuck. You didn’t want to have to call Boom’s, but the other shops didn’t open yet, and you didn’t know any of them. The decision was made.
“I need to use the phone,” you say laying your hands on the counter.
“No can do, this is a business line,” he spits, bits of his barely chewed breakfast falling from his over stuffed mouth.
Irritated beyond belief you say through gritted teeth, “What? My car broke down, I need to have it towed.”
Showing no sympathy, the combover greaseball says, “That sucks, don’t it,” a throaty chuckle erupts from him. Clearly the man got off from making next to little effort in helping someone.
“Listen,” you say peering over the counter to read the slobs name tag, “Ralph— you’re going to give me the goddamn phone so I can get my car towed, or I’m going to tell your boss about your little huffing habit. Got it?”
His cheeks crimson at your threat, “…what’s the number?”
After dialing it wrong three times, Ralph’s oversized fingers and his altered mind getting hung up on where the 4 was on the dusty rotary phone, you hastily reach across the counter and grab it and the Hawkins phone book. Flipping through the worn yellow pages, finding the number yourself and slotting your fingers in the appropriate places to get the number correct, it finally starts ringing.
Angrily tapping your foot, the serenade of dial tone ringing loud in your ear.
“Boom’s” a bored voice says, after ehat seems like hours of waiting.
“Hey, — is Eddie there?”
A scoff is heard from the other end of the phone, followed by an annoyed voice, “Why who wants to know?”
You don’t have time for childish games with whoever this fucking prick is. “Jesus Christ what is it with assholes today? Is he there or no?”
“I don’t know, you stupid bitch— why don’t you tell me if Eddie is here or—”
A scuffle is heard as the phone falls to the ground.
“What the fuck did I tell you? Huh? I’ll drop your ass just name the time and place mother fuck— hello?”
“Eddie?” You ask exhaustedly.
“Tooty? Oh shit, you miss me so much you’re making calls to my work?”
“E—” you begin, frustration rising.
“Or did you call to gossip? Ooooh, tell me all about the salon drama, is it that blonde again, damn just slap her already I know you want to.”
“Ed—!”
“Shit if you’re worried about going to jail I’ll come bail y—”
“Edward Joseph Munson!”
There was a pause on the other end of the line, “Did you just use my full name? I only hear that when I’m in trouble with Wayne.”
“Will you listen to me?! I need help. I’m at the gas station east of town and my car won’t start.”
“What? What happened?” Eddie asks, his joking tone immediately fading to concern.
“I have no idea, but I’m already late for work—can you come pick me up?”
“Usually this is where a please would be.”
“Eddie!”
“Ooh even begging?”
“Goddamnit,” you say under your breath, “Eddie will you please, come get me?”
“That a girl, see that wasn’t so hard. So where are you?”
-
Eddie rolls up in an old orange and white tow truck, head banging with a cigarette hanging limply from his bottom lip. “So what happened?”
“Well I drove here, got gas, and then it just wouldn’t start.”
“Damn, I wonder if your starter is out.”
“Great, so what the hell does that mean?”
“Well, I’m not sure if it is that or not, but if it’s not that— it means that your car is probably going to need more work than it’s worth, but I won’t know until I get it in the shop.”
“Son of a bitch.” you curse, covering your face with your hands and tipping your head back up to the sky. Could this fucking day get any worse?
After buying the house last year, your savings were completely wiped out, the last few months you had been pinching pennies trying to build it back up
“I’ll tow it, but I don’t think Boom has any loaners right now,” Eddie explains, “but since I’m such a kind, handsome, good roommate….”
You roll your eyes.
“I’ll bring you to work.”
Shock evident on your face, “You sure?”
“I mean its either that or the city bus, and last I checked—Hawkins doesn’t have one.”
Eddie agrees to give you a ride until your car is fixed on one condition, the band gets to use the garage for practices again. Too tired to fight with him, you give in.
He backs the truck up, moving the steering wheel with one hand the other hanging out of the window, his tongue poked out through his lips. He jumps down from the truck and maneuvers the wheel lift into place by your front tires.
The muscles in his forearms jut out, tattoos dancing with each movement and covered in a thin sheet of sweat as he grabs the chains from the flatbed and hooks them along your front tires, securing them into place. Your car is lifted slightly giving enough clearance to be able to tow.
“Ready?”
-
Bouncing along side Eddie in the tow truck you sigh heavily, “fuck, I hate Mondays.”
“Okay, Garfield,” Eddie chuckles, turning down the radio and glancing towards you, a cigarette balanced between his teeth, “could always be worse,” he digs into his front pocket for his pack of cigarettes and hands them to you.
You smile weakly and take the pack from him, plucking a tanned filter from the pack and shoving it between your lips. Before you can even say that your lighter is in the car, he’s leaning over. A scratched zippo with a fading design on it, in his hand already flicked open, the flame threatening to go out with the help of the lazy breeze through the open driver’s side window. It’s the same lighter he’s had since you first bummed a cigarette from him when you were thirteen.
Leaning towards him you put the cigarette into the flame, inhaling deep— the cowboy killers burning the pinky tissue of your lungs. He flicks the lighter closed with a metallic snap and smiles out of the corner of his mouth at you. Suddenly your lungs aren’t the only thing burning.
“Thanks,” you say, trying to avoid the skips in your stomach, “I usually prefer menthols, but I guess, these’ll do,”
“Always gotta bust my balls dontchya?” Eddie laughs, a stream of smoke billowing out from his nose. “Hey, uh— I’m not trying to tell you what to do, but that gas station is rated 5 stars on the creepiest place in town.”
You glare your eyes at him, absolutely not having it, “they have cheap gas.”
“There’s a reason for that, and every drug dealer in town sells out of there,” Eddie scolds.
“You would know,” you say in a hateful tone.
“You’re right,” Eddie protests, looking at you earnestly, “I would know— it’s not a good place to be— no matter what time of day, so stay away from it.”
You knew he was trying to look out for you, and from what Steve said, — he blamed himself for the things Chad did to you. But it was never his fault, he didn’t know just like most of Hawkins didn’t. You lived with the Wheeler’s and not even they noticed until you walked home that night. You decide to let it be. For once in your life agreeing to what he had to say.
“Alright,”
-
Boom’s was on the opposite side of town, the rest of the drive you listened to Eddie hum along to the radio and snuck a peek at him playing air guitar. Despite him being so foul, and a royal pain in the ass, he was actually a decent human being.
No other men in their twenties could help you through your panic attack, aside from Steve. But Eddie? He was different from Steve in ways that you couldn’t grasp. You didn’t find yourself staring at Steve. Even if you had been swimming with him on more occasions than you can count. Sure he was good looking, but you never once understood why the girls at the pool practically flocked to him. Eddie hardly ever wore a shirt around you and your stomach ached each time you saw his broad shoulders and tattoos. Steve was like a brother to you, he scolded you and gave you advice, all with his hands permanently attached to his hips. A mother hen among his friends. Eddie teased and taunted you, his irritating behavior and the way he chewed his food, the way his hair was everywhere in the bathroom, the way his hair looked when he was fresh out of the shower, a towel slung on his hips. The way his hips made a ‘V’, small trail of hair from his belly button to his waistband. Fuck.
Is it hot in here?
What the hell were you doing?
There’s no way.
No fucking way.
Nope, not today.
Not ever.
..
But what if?
-
Eddie couldn’t understand what was going on with you in the passenger seat. Instead of bitching at him like normal, you were staring out the window. Looking as if you were fighting a storm in your cute little head. Maybe you were reliving the past. Silently suffering through something that he should have been there to stop. But judging from your reflection against the dirty window, you didn’t seem to be crying.
After that night, Eddie was putting in more effort to make sure you felt safe. He gave you distance. Avoided the bathroom in the morning, and stopped making dick jokes altogether. He still joked around, still acted like an idiot— but his perverted meter was dipped into the green zone, the safety net.
He meant what he said, you didn’t have to be afraid with him around. And he would do whatever he could to prove that to you. So when you called Boom’s earlier and asked for help— he dropped everything to make the trek across town to pick you up. Especially when you told him the gas station you were at. Known for being the skeeziest one in town, he worried about you being there alone.
Seeing the tow truck pull into the parking lot, Sean and Aaron had their noses pressed against the glass, the cheap flimsy blinds hung crooked over their heads.
“Damn,” Aaron exclaims, “you were right, that is her.”
“Told you, Munson hasn’t shut up about her since he moved in. Wonder if Chad knows where she’s been hiding.”
-
Eddie parks the tow truck and you both climb out. He gives you the keys to his van and tells you he’d be right back. Walking into the shop with a whistle on his tongue, he goes into Boom’s office. He’s sitting at a worn down wooden desk. Papers, and receipts clutter space where a framed family picture might be. A steaming styrofoam cup of coffee in Boom’s left hand suggested he stopped at the donut mart, and a dozen of glazed holes from heaven would be sitting in the break room, their sweetness tantalizing the crew all day.
Eddie raps his knuckles against the yellowed paint by the door frame.
‘Yep,” Boom chirps without looking up, reading the daily arrest records in the Hawkins Post.
“Hey, I brought Tooty’s Escort back, I’m going to bring her to work quick and when I get back I’ll move it.”
“What’s wrong with it?” Boom gripes, not looking up from the paper, sipping the coffee slowly.
“Dunno, I’ll take a look at it— “ Eddie shifts his weight from one foot to another, “I was wondering if I could maybe work on it after hours, or on the weekends.”
Boom considers what Eddie is saying, “off the clock?”
“Yeah, or maybe I could take some of my tools home? Work on it there?”
Boom thinks for a while, taking a sip of his coffee. His pudgy finger hovering near the name “William Hargrove” mulling over if he knew him. He finally looks up, “Whatever you wanna do, Eddie, you’ve got keys—I trust you.” Boom offers, “just don’t let those other two jackasses know what you’re doing and who for— that’s all they’ve been yappin’ about since you left this morning.
Eddie rolls his eyes, “I’m just helping out a friend, don’t know why they give a fuck.”
“Personally, I don’t give a shit— but you’re my best mechanic, and those other two are on their last strike with me. One more time I read their name in this paper and they’re both out of here, and when that time comes— I’m sure they’ll be lookin’ for someone to blame.”
-
The familiar scent of stale weed and a spilled rotting beer in the back of the van flood your nose. Even though his van was a dirty pile of shit and it stunk like hell, you’re thankful for Eddie taking time out of his day to help you.
He could have easily told you to fuck off, hung up on you the minute you called. But he didn’t. He kept good on his word even when he didn’t have to. He doesn’t owe you anything and yet here he was, proving to you again, that he could be someone to rely on. You peer at him through your lashes, falling deep into a spell of fondness. He was always clean shaven, showing off his babyish features. If you didn’t know his age you wouldn’t guess he was over twenty two, his youthful pale skin a glow like the moon across a lake at midnight. The deep browns of his eyes squint in the bright sun, his dark eyelashes almost kissing his cheeks. His thick ringed fingers tapping on the steering wheel as ‘Holy Diver’ plays gently in the background. The bob of his Adam's apple jutting out as he swallows and takes a drag from a cigarette.
You barely recognize your own voice when you say barely above a whisper, “thank you, by the way— not just for today but for the other night,” your fingers go back to the same nervous habit, twiddling the end of your cream lettuce hem shirt.
“Of course,” he says, a look of shock on his face, “I know I like to give you shit, but I wouldn’t leave you stranded somewhere.” He looks over at you lazily and smiles. The kind of smile associated with cool guys on tv, the kind of smile that’s crooked and truly only on one side of the face. And for the first time, you smile too, letting the warmth radiate through your body, venturing into places that you have to readjust your crossed legs to avoid entirely.
Pulling into the backlot of the salon, where you and Nancy smoke cigarettes and read trash magazines, you jump out thanking him again, the creak of the door slamming back into the frame as you wave goodbye.
“What time?” Eddie yelled after you, silently admiring the way the sun catches your face, highlighting your features, the slight breeze catching your hair, he can’t help the smile that dances on his lips. “What time are you off work?”
Walking back to him, he’s leaning his head back on the head rest, an arm hanging out of the window, a stupid grin on his face.
“My last client is at five and it’s just a cut, so probably six o’clock, why?” A creep of jittery shock threatens your nerves, fluttering your stomach and sending waves of fluster through your body.
“Thought I’d pick you up, unless you wanna walk home?” He smirks, tracing the small paint chip near where his fingers set on the door.
Biting your lip and moving back on your heels you make your way back to the door, “Okay.”
“Alright, I’ll be back at six.”
“Six” you repeat, turning on your heel and walking into the salon.
-
Eddie has thought about you all day, the cards of life and the hand you were dealt were shitty. But he was happy he was around to help in any little way he could. He thought maybe he was crazy, seeing shit when you smiled at him, a sort of shyness in the way you flirted by dipping your head into your shoulder almost giddy at him picking you up.
But that couldn’t be.
-
The rest of your day was monotonous. Shampoo sets, perms, cuts, rinse and repeat. The long haired metalhead hardly left your mind. When it’s just you and Josie left in the salon after your last appointment, it’s 5:30. She sits down, exhaling loudly. Her long dark braids trailing to her waist, cascade down the length of the chair as she leans back.
“Broke down again? Girl, you need a car that actually works.” Her hot pink fingernails dip into a bag of skittles, popping them into her mouth.
“I know,” you sigh, throwing yourself into your salon chair, “hopefully in the next few months I’ll have enough saved to get myself a new one.”
“So how did you get here? If we had someone else in the salon today I would have came and picked you up,” her mouth puckered into a sucking expression as she pops another skittle into her mouth.
“My roommate… he works at Boom’s so he towed it there and then brought me to work,” you express nonchalantly.
“Ooh the rich one who you used to work with?”
“Steve?” You say with a laugh, “No, Eddie Munson.”
“Eddie Munson? Why does that name sound so familiar? Ohh the infamous Hawkins bad boy, my cousins used to run around with him, some club or somethin’ ”
“Yeah, that's him, he’s turned himself around quite a bit since high school though.” The annoying need to defend him is obvious in your tone.
Josie’s eyes go wide, “Wait—“ she says, pointing a pink nail at you, “he had a girlfriend. He’s living with you? Shit, you’re a brave one.”
Heat creeps to your cheeks, the thought of Eddie having a secret girlfriend that you didn’t know about was almost torture on your soul, “no, no girlfriend… that I’m aware of at least.”
Speak of the devil and he will be present.
Opening the door with the sun waning behind him, peeking an orangy-yellow glow through his unruly curls, stood Eddie. His coveralls are full of motor oil and brake fluid. Black grease is smeared across his face, and his hands. Bandana still snug around his head.
“Oh shit,” Eddie blurts, eyes scanning around the room, bouncing from your face to Josie’s. Clearly uncomfortable in such a clean establishment. “Sorry, I’m uhh, a little early.”
Josie’s eyebrows are turned up in shock, her mouth slightly agape. “Damn, you’re the roommate!?”
Before she can embarrass you any further you blurt, “Josie, this is Eddie,” holding out a hand and pointing, introducing him to her, “Eddie this is my boss and the owner of the salon, Josie.”
Eddie waves with his fingers, “so you’re the one lookin’ after our girl here, the mechanic?” Josie asks.
“Uhh, yeah that’s me.” he puts a hand on the back of his neck and rubs it slow
Josie stands and walks towards you, a clicking of her heels and munching on her candy as she grabs your hand and drags you upwards, dragging you to the back of the salon.
Eddie looks around the room. The salon is decorated in light washes of pink and green and flowers decorate almost every surface, White painted baskets hang from the ceiling holding fake flowers. The salon chairs are black as are the mats under them. Green sinks in the back and cabinets overhead. Two mirrors on each wall and station with a name and family pictures decorate them. Eddie can’t help but notice that where you were sitting, there are only three pictures. A photo of you and Nancy looking like it was taken last summer, you’re holding up the keys to the blue ranch style house he now calls home. Another picture is of you Robin and Steve, in green Family Video Vests in front of the counter. You and Robin are both pulling one of Steve’s ears and he’s making a monkey face. The last picture is of you and Eyeball as kids, a portrait more than likely taken at a JC Penney’s.
“Don’t forget to lock up, okay? Enjoy your day off tomorrow. Eddie, be good to her!” Josie calls from the back, the heavy metal door slamming as she leaves for the night, a smile painted on her lips, shaking her head.
You walk back towards Eddie, he’s sitting in your chair, poking around at all of the different brushes and curling irons that were on your station. Your tired eyes scan him and find him in the mirror. “What is all this shit?”
“My tools to style, cut and color people’s hair.”
You’re standing behind him. You hesitantly grab one of his curls in between your fingers, noting how silky and smooth his hair is despite the split ends. “You could probably use a trim, Eddie. When was the last time you had your hair cut?”
“You think these curls have been in a salon? Please! I cut it myself thank you,”
“I can tell,” you mutter under your breath, going full hog and untying his sweaty bandana and tossing it onto the counter. “Come on, let’s go wash your hair, and then I’m gonna give you a trim.”
“You’re not cutting my hair.” Eddie protests, arms crossed and resisting.
“Your ends are dead, if you don’t take care of it now, it’ll keep going further up and then you’ll have to shave your head.”
Eddie practically trips standing up quickly. “Those are fighting words.”
“Do you really think I’d do that?” You ask in a bored tone.
“Actually no, but— okay fine! Only because you went to some fancy school.”
Eddie stomps over to the sink and sits down with a plop in the smooth cushioned black chair. You follow behind him and place your apron back around your neck, tightening it around your back. You lean his chair back telling him to lift his head from the headrest as you gather his curls into the basin.
Turning on the water and testing the temperature on your wrist, like a mother testing a bottle making sure it isn’t too hot for a baby, you gently put the spray into the ends of Eddie’s hair, gently working the spray up the length of his head to his scalp.
“Is the water okay?”
“Ow, holy shit!” Eddie yelps, his body flopping around like a fish out of water. You immediately turn the faucet the other way, apologizing profusely until you realize Eddie is shaking with laughter.
“Oh fuck, … you…” more laughing as he chokes out his words, “should have seen your face.” He mimics your face and bursts into a fit of giggles, you aren’t sure how long he would have kept it up if you didn’t put the hose directly into his face and throw a towel at him.
“Wipe that grin off your face or I’ll wax your eyebrows.” You spit at him, letting out a small laugh.
Mumbling from under the towel is faint but you swear you hear the word bikini.
Eddie finished cleaning his face and lays his head back into the sink again, you don’t ask this time but immediately start wetting his hair. “So,” he says, closing his eyes, so water won’t get in them, “I think I figured out what is wrong with your car.”
“Oh really? Is it going to be an easy fix?”
Not wanting to admit to you that he was working on your car for free or that he would borrow as many tools as he had to to get your car fixed, he settles for a half truth.
“Shouldn’t be too bad, gotta get some parts ordered for it.”
You let out a groan, “oh God— how much are they?”
“Don’t worry about it.”
“What do you mean?”
“Exactly what I just said, don’t worry about it, now treat me like one of your clients and tell me all the hot gossip in your life.”
Taking three giant pumps from the white shampoo bottle in the cabinet, you gently massage it into his scalp. Letting the cool smooth pearlescent liquid suds up. His hair feels like brown ropes of silk in your hands. All the years of having your hands in someone else’s hair were nothing compared to the odd feeling of lightly working the suds into Eddie’s mane. Baby soft. Luxurious in ways that contradicted the metalhead image he wore so well like a coat of armor.
You weren’t the only one admiring the way his hair felt in your hands.
Eddie is fighting hard not to melt into a puddle right there in Josie’s salon. Your hands were like magic against his scalp, your nails lightly scratching small circles against his skull. He was sure he’d fall asleep if he kept his eyes closed for any longer. It was the closest thing he could compare to what heaven would be like. Hints of tropical coconut mixed with crushed pineapple filled the air. He didn’t even realize you were talking until he opened his eyes and caught a glimpse of your mouth moving over him. Your face was concentrating on the story that you were telling, but it fell on deaf ears. He was in a trance. The scrape of your nails against his head was almost pornographic to him. The way your eyes were trained on the job at hand. The way your lips parted and moved as you told the story. The animated look in your eyes, sparkling with each slow blink, your eyelashes teasing him.
He had never noticed the features of your face before. Usually if he was this close you were staring up at him and pointing one of those glorious fingernails into his chest, yelling at him— eyebrows pulled in, your face set in a scowl. But now here you were, scratching an itch he didn’t know he had. Filling a void he wasn’t aware was missing. He could die right now and he wouldn’t even know it. It was almost orgasmic the way you were making him feel, all with just simply washing his hair.
He caught himself before you could notice it. He crossed his legs and willed himself to think of anything else. Shutting his eyes and imagining the least sexy thing he could think of. Not wanting to ruin the moment between you both and make you never want to trust him again because he had got an accidental semi while staring at you while you were wrist deep in shampoo, scrubbing his scalp like a woman in the 1800s washing clothes on a board in the creek bed.
Nobody had ever washed his hair before, that he could remember at least. He never wanted it to end.
“…but that’s crazy right? Like she’s a psycho!” The hazy fog of lust finally left Eddie’s mind, his other four senses returning. Looking at your face and seeing that you were hurt by the story you had explained, and ashamed that he wasn’t even listening, he agreed, not even knowing if he should.
“What a bitch.”
You giggled, smiling down at him. Finally realizing you had been scrubbing his hair for almost five minutes, lost in the story. A stupid distraction to force yourself away from the feeling of the silk length of his hair, the way it felt in your fingers. Not wanting to let it slip away. You gather it all in one hand and grab the hose with the other, starting at the crown of his forehead, you rinse the suds from his hair.
Bubbles circle the basin. Disappearing down the drain along with the same shared feelings of lust and yearning. Shoved down deep away from the surface, hidden beneath hardened surfaces, shielded away from the inner depths of the softening heart.
-
You ended up cutting half an inch from Eddie’s curls, careful to not lose yourself in his hair again, almost cutting yourself in the process. Hee watched with wide sad brown eyes with each snip. “It’s like I’m watching you cut parts of my soul away.”
You roll your eyes, “It’ll grow back, and when it does it’ll be healthier and longer.”
His bangs were the next to be trimmed, not even half an inch taken off. You place a leave-in conditioner spray to keep his curls soft and to help with the tangles. Knowing full well that Eddie didn’t even own a hair brush.
When you finish and are sweeping up his curls, Eddie stands shaking his head like a dog and running his fingers through it. “Alright, I’ll admit, it does feel better.”
-
Since the agreement was made for the band to practice every other day of the week in the garage, Eddie had been bringing you to work, and picking you up. On days the band wouldn’t be practicing, when he dropped you at home, he would leave immediately after, sometimes not showing up again until midnight. Coming home tired as all hell, and just like you had done weeks before, a Tupperware of food with instructions on how to warm it up taped to the lid, would be waiting for him in the fridge, each and every time.
There was no more yelling from you when the three members of Corroded Coffin showed up. There were also no more beer cans or greasy food wrappers on the ground either. Instead a trash can sat in the corner, and Eddie paid for pizza after you ordered it.
Actually the band was pretty good. You would never tell him that, that would simply go to his head. And with the ego he already had, he didn’t need another boost of confidence, leave that for the groupies. So every Sunday, Tuesday and Thursday night the band got together, playing covers from their beloved 80’s metal Gods and sometimes original songs they would write. All of them thankful that you let them practice in the garage, Big D picking you up into a bear hug and swinging you around like a rag doll.
“Jesus Christ, D, this is why the ladies run from you, you’re too aggressive, put her down!” Eddie barks. A pang of burning in his chest at the sight of you in someone else’s arms.
Big D sets you down and apologizes, “sorry Toots, and hey speaking of ladies, whatever happened with you and those hotter than hell twins?”
“Oh shit, Gareth hollered, “Fuck dude they were all over him, surprised he’s even able to walk with the way they were strung around him like cats in heat. You usually can’t wait to tell us about it, bragging until the next gig about it at least.”
“That’s cause he probably didn’t do shit, too chicken shit to handle them.”
Your stomach flips, so it wasn’t something you remembered wrong, there were two girls that Eddie had brought home that night. A strange feeling of angst washes over you, coating your mind with uncertainty mixed with inadequacy. Your cheeks warm, embarrassed by the way you are feeling. Excusing yourself to go order the pizza, you don’t see the way Eddie dismisses the guys, blowing them off with a “why don’t we keep our sexcapades to ourselves.” Or the way he throws a full beer at Big D.
-
After ordering the Corroded Coffin special, two large pepperonis, two large sweet and swine, and an extra large order of cheesy breadsticks— you go into the cupboard and bring out several bags of chips and five paper plates. Your favorite, sour cream and onion, and Eddie’s favorite, cool ranch Doritos. You let your mind wander. Thinking about him with those two girls. Realizing this is probably where he went at night after he dropped you off.
No need to feel like that when he was just your roommate, you shake the jealousy from your head. Just Eddie. Barely a friend. Yet he was still going out of his way to take you to work every day, till doing the chores you both shared. You let the silly feelings drop, carrying the chips and plates to the garage, shutting the door behind you. Pulling up your usual lawn chair, listen to the band play and finish painting your toenails.
When the boys end the song, they start again on the conversation they had started before playing, “dude I’m not dressing up as KISS again this year,” Jeff whines to Gareth “took me forever to get that white paint off my face. And don’t even get me started on the eyeliner.”
A spray of beer soaks the ground as Eddie spits it out, laughing hysterically about the memory of watching Jeff struggle lining his eyes like Paul Stanley. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, “yeah I agree, I’m not painting your ugly mugs again this year, what else are you thinkin’?”
“We could all be different villains from scary movies. Freddy, Jason, Michael Myers’s, and Pinhead.” Big D suggests, taking a drag from his cigarette.
“Nah, no chicks wanna fuck something scary. I don’t know about you— but I tried all of last Halloween to get some tail and no girl would even look my way with all that clown paint on.” Gareth huffs twirling his drum sticks in his fingers.
“What about you Tooty?” Eddie asks earnestly, “Do you and Robin go bar hoppin’ on Halloween or do you usually stay home like an old lady knitting sweaters and handing out black licorice and molding fruit?”
Making a face at him, you paint the last coat of polish on your toe nail. “Actually, Nancy and I usually throw a party. Costume contests, kegs, beer pong… we kinda go all out.”
Eddie picks his jaw up from the floor, scoffing, “no way— Nancy Wheeler and you, throwing a rager on Halloween? I don’t buy it.”
“Call Steve and ask him, he’s the reigning Cherry Lane Halloween costume contest winner for two years running.” You say with a smirk on your lips, stretching your legs and crossing them at your ankles, the pretty maroon polish catching the dim light in the garage. “You guys are more than welcome to come, obviously it’s on Halloween night, and the only stipulation is to bring a good costume, and $5 for the keg.”
Eddie moves his tongue over his teeth, twisting his body to look at his band mates, all three of them shrugging and nodding. “Yeah, we’ll be here,
“Yeah, if you think you’re up for it. Sure.” You say nonchalantly.
-
The smell of mildew and damp carpet currently being air dried with a fan stung your nose. The soggy basement and the crumbling foundation of Sally’s Secondhand in downtown Hawkins was a hidden gem and only open in the afternoons on Mondays and Wednesdays, but they had decent prices and good quality items when you were in a pinch if you could learn to breathe through your mouth for the time you were there.
“So how’s the roomie situation going?” Nancy asks, holding up a hand mixer with two mixing parts and a wooden handle labeled for .10¢. You had scored gold when you found a gently used, practically brand new waffle iron. It was wedged between two cook books for only $2. The same one Karen Wheeler had used on Sunday mornings. You were hunting for discounted Halloween decorations still not sure on what you were going to dress as and Halloween was this Saturday, Nancy was searching for spare camera parts for Jonathan and a toy cowboy hat for her costume that she wouldn’t tell you about.
Putting a masking taped bundle of forks into the blue plastic grocery basket, your forks magically kept disappearing everytime Eddie brought leftovers to work, you let out a sigh, “It’s going okay, better than it was in the beginning. He’s fixing my car up and I cut his hair a few weeks ago. I um.. also told him about Chad.”
Nancy stops dead in her tracks, blue eyes wide, her small mouth agape, “wh-what?!” Nancy was shocked at the news, you nonchalantly delivered like saying ‘fine’ when some asked how you were. She knew how frightening that situation was for you, it was scary for her too. Seeing someone she loved and cared about hurt in ways she couldn’t even fathom.
“We ran into him while getting groceries—like a month ago. I had a full blown panic attack, and Eddie, he helped me through it.” You go into detail explaining everything that had happened. Leaving out the part of you being comforted by Eddie and the gentle way his thick hands caressed you while you sobbed into him like a child who lost their cat.
Nancy's face goes from shock and softens into content, “wow, honestly didn’t think he had a caring bone in his body, he always seemed like such an asshole.”
“I mean he still is, don’t get me wrong— I don’t think he’s giving donations to the local churches or anything, but he seems a little more reserved, if you will,” you say, adding a floral embroidered set of towels for every day of the week to your basket.
“Hmm,” Nancy says with raised eyebrows, and nodding her head, a silent confirmation of approval. Always looking up to Nancy, almost as if she was your real life sister, you admired her. She was always put together, whether you were shopping during the week or at home, she was stylish in a way that said, I will run the world, and have dinner on the table at 6. Her white huarache sandals matched her high waisted pink pastel shorts and white button sleeveless blouse. Effortlessly stunning.
Moving along the aisles you and Nancy both finger through the clothing racks. Pulling out neon prints and a pair Madonna—esque white lace gloves, they probably belonged to that muppet singing idiot, Tammy Thompson. Chuckling at how fashion trends in high school were borderline ridiculous. a denim vest in your size with safety pins on each hem gave you an idea for your costume. Finding everything you needed you were ecstatic to put it all together.
The carpet squashed beneath your feet the further you got into the store. The back room held vhs’s, records, tapes, and books. The records were in a milk carton next to a shelf of adult themed books. The fading sharpie written sign reading “Adult fiction for Women 25 cents” posted bold along the top of the shelf. Nancy discreetly placed, “Thursday and the Lady” by Patricia Matthews into her basket, covering it with matching salt and pepper shakers, a crimson tinge to her rouged cheeks.
Diving into the records you flip them towards you as you lazily scan through them. Fleetwood Mac’s Rumours, Thriller by Michael Jackson, Abbey Road by the Beatles, Kind of Blue by Miles Davis, stuck to the back of it was a small single, Ode to Billie Joe by Bobbie Gentry. It had been years since you heard it, tucking it into your basket, Nancy clears her throat nervously, the blush evident in her cheeks, “I’m ready if you are.”
-
The Saturday of Halloween the salon was closed, giving you Robin and Steve plenty of time to decorate for the party tonight. Eddie was working but was scheduled to get off around 5, just in time to come home and get his secret costume on.
Orange pumpkin printed garbage bags filled with autumn foliage lined the streets of Cherry Lane. Toilet paper streamers were in Mr. Derry’s tree, a prank the seniors of Hawkins High did to him every year, including egging his front door. Vinyl witches hung from doorknobs. Plastic ghosts holding jack-o-lanterns littered lawns. Fake strings of cotton resembling cobwebs with bendy plastic spider thrown around like glitter, lay atop shrubs. Orange lights were wrapped around the trees in your front yard, flimsy ghosts made of white sheets were hung from the branches. It was a child’s Halloween paradise.
“Higher, no lower, well now you’re just doing it wrong.” Steve was in charge of Robin who was in charge of decorations. The beer pong tournament would be in the basement, every strand of Christmas lights you could find were lighting the ceiling, table set up and cups in place. The tournament bracket started with Mike and El playing against Jeff and his girlfriend Ash. The kegs would be delivered later. Buckets ready for ice sitting on the deck. Robin and Steve were still arguing over who had the better costume last year. Twisting black and orange streamers together and hanging them in the doorway to the bathroom.
In the kitchen, you’re finishing up the Jell-O shots, small clear dishes full of cherry red jello made with everclear. A bitter threat to anyone brave enough to eat them. The spinach and artichoke dip is prepped in the fridge, along with 10 packages of crescent rolls, 5 packages of hotdogs, the fruit cut and ready to be put into Steve’s horrendous Jungle Juice that you would actively be avoiding. Nancy and Jonathan were bringing pinwheels and rotel dip. Dustin and Susie are in charge of bringing candy. It’s going to be a blast.
-
“Be right back,” Robin and Steve call out as they leave to go get their costumes. Putting the finishing touches on your costume your hand shakes with nervousness while swiping mascara on your lashes, the pre party jitters wracking your nerves. The ring of the doorbell startles you. The obnoxious ringing should be a dead giveaway but you don’t recognize it until the door is wide open and you’re face to face with Jesus Christ himself and three nuns. Or as you knew them, Eddie, Gareth, Jeff, and Big D.
You aren’t sure whose mouth is hanging open more. Yours or Eddie’s. Eddie is wearing a long sleeved cream colored gown, complete with a crimson sash. His usual black leather boots on his feet and a crucifix in his hand.
Eddie is the first to laugh, hands held out like he’s blessing the house before he enters it. “Aww sweetheart, you really are my #1 fan aren’t you?”
You are dressed as the most annoying on the planet, pain in the ass, voted most perverted of all of Hawkins: Eddie. When shopping with Nancy you found the vest, adding a few hand sewn patches and the best replica of Eddie’s DIO patch on the back, even shoving a pack of reds into the pocket, it looked pretty good. A twin of the aforementioned jackass. Borrowing Nancy’s cheap leather jacket when she went as Sandy from Grease last year, and putting holes into a pair of jeans and washing them as many times as you could to fray the edges, it was perfect. Complete with a horrible curly wig that you thought was a life dog upon seeing it.
“I was going for scary and scary annoying,” you shrug, “think I nailed it.”
“As hilarious and surprisingly accurate your costume is, the real winner for the party is going to be us” He gestured to him and the nuns. “figured I’d go as something that everyone says I need more of and you recognize the boys right? They’re dressed as your friends from work.”
-
The kegs finally show up and Eddie blesses the delivery man before he leaves. Fully throwing himself into character. Dustin and Susie are the first to arrive, dressed as Mrs. Doubtfire and Sally Ride, the first woman astronaut to go into space.
Dustin laughs so hard he cries at your costume. “Oh my God please you have to say, ‘forced conformity, it’s what’s killing the kids!’ Please Tooty Holy shit!”
Mimicking Eddie perfectly you saunter away and scream about society and how good Metallica is.
“Oh haha, so funny Tooty,” Eddie pouts, holding a beer funnel in his hands, “come on Henderson let’s see you put your money where your mouth is.”
-
The backyard is sprayed with foamy beer as Dustin very much can not put his money where his mouth is. Gareth’s up next, chugging like a champion and doing a lap around the backyard like he won a trophy. Eddie and Jeff shotgun beer, Eddie winning by a mile. Laughing and putting his hands in a praying gesture to bless Jeff for his shortcomings.
The rest of the party goers show up, Nancy is dressed like Annie Oakley wielding a fake shotgun and a straw cowboy hat and a long brown dress with fringe hanging from the shoulders. Jonathan and his long haired friend Argyle arrive behind Nancy dressed as Sonny & Cher. Argyle had given up the fast moving life in California once a Surfer Boys pizza arrived in Hawkins. He delivered to the house so much during the nights that Corroded Coffin was practicing that he had your order prepped and ready to go by the time you had called it in. He’d show up so blitzed out of his mind that he’d forget he was at work, sharing his different strains of weed with all the Corroded Coffin boys.
Robin and Steve are in the kitchen, ladling jungle juice into empty cups. The duo dressed as Thelma and Louise, Robin wearing a black muscle shirt and sunglasses, and Steve wore a white tank top with a neckerchief. Both talking in horrible southern accents.
Eddie is standing next to Argyle in the living room both holding almost empty cups of the forbidden jungle juice, deep in conversation about something called Purple Palm Tree Delight, but knowing them, it had nothing to do with a lavender paradise. You reach around Eddie to grab a pinwheel, taking a bite when Argyle, clearly stoned, goes wide eyed leaning into Eddie his eyes still transfixed on you he whisper yells.
“Yo, I swear to God, I just saw two of you.”
“Argyle it’s me, Tooty.” You explain standing next in front of them trying not to laugh. “This is the real Eddie, I’m just dressed like him for Halloween.”
Argyle leans forward and whispers into your ear, “Yeah okay man that’s what the aliens would say before they clone us and take over.”
He leans back and takes two big steps backwards, eyes wide in a horrified daze, before disappearing down into the basement.
“Don’t think I’ve ever said this before, but that guy smokes way too much.” Eddie chuckles, downing the rest of his jungle juice and eating the fruit at the bottom of the cup.
“I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” you warn him watching with your own gut twisting as the sweet juices of strawberry slither down his chin and down the slope of his neck.
“Sweetheart,” Eddie says, smacking his lips, “I’m twenty six years old, I can handle my liquor.”
“Okay,” you reply, “just so you know, the fruit soaks up all the alcohol and Steve presoaks it all in everclear the night before. Last time he ate all the fruit he spent an hour in the bathroom crying about his love life or lack thereof. And besides, we have to play in the pong tournament in a half hour.”
“We?” Eddie asks, lips turned up and a slight blush to his cheeks, “I didn’t sign up for beer pong.” His dark eyes pour into yours.
Heat creeps up your neck as you reach for a Jell-O shot cracking the lid off and circling the dish with your finger before sucking it into your mouth.
“I signed you up,” you say, reaching for another Jell-O shot, “everyone had a partner but Argyle and Will, so I paired you with Argyle, and I’m with Will,” you slide your finger around the Jell-O dish and suck the cherry gelatin into your mouth, savoring the bitter bite to your tongue before you crush it between your teeth.
“You better bring your A game Munson,” you say, taking a step into him and poking him in the chest, “because I don’t lose.”
Eddie isn’t sure if it’s the alcohol that’s making him feel this way or you but suddenly he can’t stop blushing, laying the charm on thicker than peanut butter, “oh really?” he asks intrigued, “Well babe, I don’t think you know this but I’m the Forest Hills Trailer Park Pong Champion for eight summers in a row, so technically,” he’s leaning forward now, whispering low to get his point across. Your breath hitches in your throat, you can feel the tickle of his lips against your ear, his hair is brushing against your face, the faint smell of motor oil stuck in his curls, “I never lose either.”
He pulls back and your eyes lock. The heat flooding your cheeks burn, the ache in your stomach travels south and pulses with want. You can’t deny it to yourself, even dressed as Jesus Christ, Eddie is the best looking guy you’ve laid eyes on, and you were melting at the way his dark eyes gazed into yours, a smirk placed on his lips as he brushes his tongue over his bottom lip to catch the remnants of the horrific fruit juice. His eyes never leave yours as he takes the Jell-O shot dish you’re holding and sets it behind him on the table. The tension could be cut with a knife, thick and heavily hanging in the space between you both. Eddie opens his mouth to speak but is interrupted by El screaming for Mike to get to the backyard instead of puking in the kitchen sink. Her Alice in Wonderland wig askew on her head and holding Mike’s mad hatter hat between her hands.
Running to open the sliding door you get it open just in time for Mike to projectile vomit off the deck.
“Christ, what did he eat?” Eddie asks from behind you, “damn Mike you’re such a pussy!”
“His dumbass didn’t eat all day and when he got here he decided that Jell-O and fruit would be a good option.” El says, rubbing his back as he pukes again and again, “I don’t feel bad for you Mike!”
Wiping his mouth on his forest green jacket sleeve, he murmurs, “Babe, I’m fine, seriously, a few pieces of bread and I’ll be in tip top sh—“ puke splatters wetly against the grass again.
You grab El’s hand and squeeze, “let me know if you need anything, okay?” She nods and smiles sweetly.
“C’mon,” Eddie says behind you, “let’s go so I can kick your ass in beer pong.”
You turn your head, half facing him, “game on, Munson.”
-
The sharpie bracket on poster board continued moving forward thanks to Steve’s basketball knowledge. Jeff and Ash beat Mike and El, Nancy and Jonathan beat out Gareth and Big D in a very close came both opponents having one cup left. Steve and Robin were beat out in the first round by Dustin and Susie, something King Steve would never be living down. Nex on the bracket to play would be you and Will playing Argyle and Eddie. Honestly it should be a piece of cake, a walk in the park. Will wasn’t the most athletic but last year him and Jonathan got second place against you and Nancy so the odds were pretty high. One thing you were absolutely certain of was that you would not be losing to Jesus and Cher tonight.
The basement is packed with everyone besides the ill Mike and faithful El. Argyle and a pink lensed Will are in the corner smoking a fat blunt the sequin jacket he’s wearing sparkles through the haze of smoke and the catches the lights. You haven’t seen him since Nancy and Jonathan’s wedding. But he’s letting his hair grow out, finally letting the bowl cut Joyce insisted on him having all throughout middle school and high school go. Steve has Dustin in a headlock for teasing him about winning against Mr. Hawkins High basketball star of 1985.
“Ya know for once, I was actually good, like really good, Steve overthrew the last cup and it was game over once Susie got the ball. She’s strangely amazing at beer pong. Probably found the mathematical equation from the distance of the table and her elbow to the solo cups.” Robin rambles on, only stopping to get her breath. “How are you? I haven’t seen you all night. Killer costume by the way, if you can’t beat ‘em be ‘em right?”
Robin and her absolute no filter mouth, always make you laugh, linking your arm with hers, “I really like your and Steve’s take on best friends driving off a cliff together to evade police.”
“JESUS CHRIST!” someone yells from upstairs.
Not missing a beat, Eddie can be heard returning the exclamation. “You rang?”
Rolling your eyes and looking his way, you laugh when you see him, holding up his arms in praise.
Robin’s voice bringing you back to the conversation, “Epic right? Steve thought we could be conjoined twins but then decided against it when he figured there was a small chance he could possibly get lucky tonight when that black haired girl at his job kept hinting that she wanted a date with him.”
“What!” you shout, “He never told me this!”
Robin rolls her eyes and takes another drink from her too foamy beer, “he’s nervous, I think he really likes her but doesn’t wanna fuck it up like he does everything else.”
Steve deserved to be happy and to have someone love him. He was always making sure everyone else was okay, you smile at the thought of him with a girlfriend.
“So,” Robin presses, wiggling her eyebrows, “Eddie looks good tonight,” a wicked smile dances wildly on her lips.
“I’m not at all buzzed enough to have this conversation,” you say, taking a peak at Eddie through your eyelashes, he was laughing loudly at something Steve had said, head thrown back, exposing his neck.
Will joins your side, reeking of weed and heavy musk cologne. “Tooty!” He squeals, wrapping you into a tight hug, “the house looks so fucking good I can’t believe it, also I heard that you’re living with Eddie? I’m going to need all the details!”
“It’s so good to see you, look at your hair!” You say holding his arms. Will threads a hand through his hair and laughs a little.
“Thanks, it’s new but it’s kinda growing on me, now, spill it. Tell me everything.”
“Next game!” Nancy announces, advancing her and Jonathan to the next bracket. “Argyle/ Eddie vs Tooty/ Will.”
Will grabs your hand and drags you to the beer pong table, “after?” He asks and you nod your head.
Eddie and Argyle are standing on one end, you and Will on the other. The cups are arranged into a triangle and filled with the warming pitcher of keg beer.
“You ready to go down groveling, sweetheart?” Eddie sings from across the table, eyes squinting when he leans on the edge of the table smiling at you.
Your stomach flutters, taking a long swig of Will’s jungle juice, staring Eddie down as you gulp the vile liquor and fruit punch combo down, “You ready to get your ass kicked, Munson?”
-
“Woo! That’s balls back ba-by,” you sneer, hooting and hollering as Eddie begrudgingly tosses the balls back your way. It was almost as if Argyle and Will weren’t even there, this game was between you and Eddie. You were definitely buzzed, between the warm beer and the Jell-O shots you had eaten you were feeling good.
When you miss the first cup, Eddie makes devil horns at you and howls at the moon like an idiot. You sink the next cup, earning a high-five from Will, and a sly grin from Eddie as he removes the cup and chugs the warm beer. He’s secretly excited that you’re so happy, letting loose, in your element, surrounded by your loving friends. You glowing with a sense of freedom. In that moment when your eyes caught his, he knew he was in trouble, you were wrapped around his finger and he didn’t think of hardly anything else, but you, your beautiful smile, the way your hair caught each light you were under. He was in deep, and for right now, he was perfectly and utterly okay with that.
It’s Argyle’s turn and he surprisingly sinks both cups, being awarded with balls back, as you and Will each take a cup and drink the suds down. Trying to distract him, you whip off your Eddie- esque wig and toss it towards Eddie, shaking your hair out like a wild woman.
Unphased by your antics he does it again and you groan. Four in a row? This guy was half asleep the entire game and all of a sudden he’s an athlete? They only have 1 cup left. Tension rises and the room goes to silence at Steve’s request. Argyle sinks it. Eddie erupts into cheers grabbing Argyle by the shoulders and jumping up and down.
“Redemption attempt!” Steve shouts, giving Will the ball. Will takes it with nervous fingers, blowing the ball to dry it slightly as you chug the last cup. He only has two cups to make. Will tosses the ball and the room goes silent, it feels like it’s in slow motion, or maybe that’s the alcohol. The ball soars through the air, bouncing against the rim of the cup lapping up the foamy beer, before it falls off and teeters off onto the table.
Argyle raises both hands in the air, “VICTORY!” the room erupts with cheers. Will apologizes profusely but you hug him tight, telling him you were happy he was your partner.
“Next game is Jonathan/Nancy vs Jeff/ Ash starting in 20 mins!” Steve hollers. The basement clears out as people go upstairs to use the bathroom and refill their drinks.
You expect Eddie to be gloating, cocky beyond belief. But he’s the opposite, coming up to you slowly, head bowed, upper teeth practically biting his lower lip in half.
“Good game sweetheart,” he says barely above a whisper, “not gonna lie, I really thought you guys were gonna win.”
Holding your chin high, face only inches from his, the brown pools of colored whiskey stare into your eyes. Placing a hand on his chest, the alcohol gives you enough of a push to cross the line. The thin gauzy material of the gown he’s wearing is sticky with sweat and warm from the heat radiating from his body. “Told myself I wouldn’t lose to Cher and Jesus tonight.”
Eddie let’s out a throaty laugh, “can’t believe he pulled that off, he didn’t make a cup all game.”
“Guess you get to continue wearing that tarnished crown, speaking of wardrobe… where the hell did you get this outfit?”
“You know that church across from the police station?”
“The one with the Jesus statue inside?”
Eddie raises his eyebrows and gives you a knowing glance, waiting for you to catch on.
“No way! Eddie! You broke into a church and stole an outfit off of a statue?”
“Amen,” Eddie says roaring with laughter, “ahh c’mon you can’t tell me it wasn’t a genius idea.”
Rolling your eyes, “I wouldn’t exactly call it genius, but funny? Yes.”
He laughs again, “not everyday I get a compliment from myself,” he says eyeing your costume, “you do make a pretty cute Eddie Munson if I say so myself.” he wasn’t even thinking anything of it, just blurted it right out.
Flirting came easy to him almost as a second nature, he was never nervous around women, usually finding the game of sex not just something he was good at but conquered with ease. But this, here, with you? Was a slippery slope. A different game for him entirely. He was a pawn amongst you and you were the queen, striking down whoever came near, holding all the power.
Your cheeks heat from his compliment, blood rushing through your body and warming your skin, he holds your hand to your chest, stroking your fingers with his thumbs.
A thousand bolts of lightening ignite you, he smells like smoke, ashy and burning, the cheap keg beer on his breath as he smiles softly at you.
“Tooty!” Steve calls from the top step, clinging onto it for dear life, “are you down there?!”
You’re the first one to break away, pulling your hand from his grasp, threading them together at the last minute, finger tips clinging to each other like velcro. The flames between you both extinguished fast, no oxygen left in the room to keep it going.
Getting to the bottom step and turning, you give him one last glance and a small smile, before trotting up the stairs to Steve.
-
Eddie opens the patio door to find Gareth and Big D blowing smoke into the sky and talking about the best DIO song.
“Shit man, where have you been? Didn’t your game end like 15 minutes ago?”
Eddie thinks of a lie quick, “Taking a piss why you wanna watch?”
“That’s weird,” Big D questions, “cause Gareth just came out of the bathroom unless there’s a magic bathroom you haven’t told us about.”
“What are you guardian of the toilet?” Eddie says slotting a cigarette between his teeth and flicking his zippo open.
“I mean he’s got a point,” Gareth interjects, “where have you been tonight, turning water into wine? Or are you healing the blind?”
“Cool it, Whoopi,” Eddie bites, “the fuck does it matter where I was or wasn’t?”
“You’ve changed dude. Used to be a ladies man, different chick every night. Smoking and drinking all night watching the sunrise. Fuck man you were hell on wheels. Then all of a sudden you move in here and you’re acting like the Pope, fixing up her car off the clock, bringing her to and from work, you’re like her fucking babysitter.” Gareth exclaims.
“Fuck off man, she’s Eyeball’s sister, and I’m just looking out for her.” Eddie grits through his teeth.
“Or,” Big D suggests, “you like her, I mean you still haven’t even told us about the twins— and you stare at her like she’s about to combust at any moment.”
“Yeah and what do you two know about anything?” Eddie spits.
“Clearly not shit, but you’re all fucking riled up about a girl you don’t like.” Gareth flicks his cigarette and goes inside, Big D following.
The door opens again, “listen man, I’m not in the mood for your stupid fucking advice.” Eddie groans, turning to see Steve standing at the door, an empty pitcher in his hand. “Shit, sorry, thought you were Gareth.”
“Nope kept my habit at home,” Steve says with a chuckle, setting the pitcher on the edge of the deck, “nice party, huh?”
“Yeah,” Eddie agrees, “ya know when Tooty first told me that her and Nancy threw a party every year I didn’t believe it, turns out I was wrong about her, seems to be a theme of mine lately.”
“She doesn’t let a lot of people in, but once you’re here, it means she trusts you, respects you.” Steve explains.
Eddie smiles softly, ashing his cigarette.
“She cares about you, ya know? She might not want to admit it— may even be scared to admit it to herself, but she likes you.”
Eddie gives him a look. Sure you were nicer to him, not threatening to kick him out anymore. You had let the band practice in the garage, even staying out there to hear them play. But that didn’t mean anything did it?
“How many times do you think she’s cut my hair?” Steve inquires, leaning next to the railing on the deck beside Eddie.
“I don’t know,” Eddie says honestly, “a dozen?”
Steve chuckles, “Never, not once, never even offered. You think she made elaborate meals for Nancy when they lived together? Wrong— she barely touched the stove. You move in and she’s changed, for the better. It’s like she’s coming back to life, and the only common thing in that equation, is you.”
Eddie mulls this over, could Steve be right? “I don’t know man.”
“I may not be Mr. Relationship but I do know Tooty, and you’ve softened her edges. Tamed that frightful girl we all love and adore. She’s got walls up, keeping people out, but not around you, not anymore.”
Eddie hangs his head, his heart bursting with sad euphoric bliss. He couldn’t go about this like any other conquest. And with you it would never be how it was with the other women. Faceless broads in mini skirts, praising him, doing whatever he wanted them to. He never saw you in that way. Holding you on a pedestal about the rest. He hadn’t been in a relationship in years. One too many times of being cheated on was enough for him. But you were hurt too, more so than he was. He was still licking his wounds with anything willing and able. You? You were a shell of yourself. He couldn’t act on this like he would with anyone else. He cared about you too damn much to make you feel like you couldn’t trust him again.
“And I know you care about her. Everytime I look at you you’re staring at her like a sad little puppy.”
Eddie looks up then, looking at Steve like he held all the answers to life’s questions. He turns and leans against the deck, elbows on the railing just how Steve was facing the house.
“Yeah, you’re right, I do care about her, more than anything. So what do I do?” He asks Steve.
Steve shrugs, letting out a loud sigh, “keep doing what you’re doing, she knows you care about her, just don’t disappear on her.”
Eddie turns his head from Steve and catches sight of you through the patio doors. He can see you taking a Jell-O shot with El, Robin and Nancy. A sleeping lump of clothes on the kitchen table with black hair must be Mike. You light up the room as you laugh when Robin makes a repulsive expression after taking her Jell-O shot. He can’t hear your full laugh, it’s faint through the glass. But, he doesn’t need to hear it to know the sound—having heard it more and more the last few weeks, the way you throw your head back when something is really funny, sometimes covering your mouth. He’s certain he’s never seen anyone more angelic in his life. Like you have sucked all the air from the room, even dressed in a sheer mockery of him, you’re radiating a glow that makes his heart swell. He has never cared about anyone the way that he does for you.
Seeing him through the doors standing next to Steve, he has a smirk on his face. A sudden rush of shyness creeps up your neck and you turn away from him, but you reciprocate his actions, smiling at him. A small gesture that melts him on the spot.
Eyes trained on you but still talking to Steve, Eddie beams, “I’m not going anywhere.”
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A/n: see you in volume vii
Hope you all enjoyed this. There were some little hidden Easter eggs in this chapter, go to my askbox if you found them 💕
readmore eat my ass or this line you decide, whore.
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scoonsalicious · 6 months
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Unwanted: Chapter 13, Uncomfortable - Pt. 4
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Fem!Reader
Summary: When your FWB relationship with your best friend Bucky Barnes turns into something more, you couldn’t be happier. That is, however, until a new Avenger sets her sights on your super soldier and he inadvertently breaks your heart. You take on a mission you might not be prepared for to put some distance between the two of you and open yourself up to past traumas. Too bad the only one who can help you heal is the one person you can no longer trust.
Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language, the last straw, arguing, violence, Sexually Explicit Content Minors: GTFO; I don’t serve your kind here (angry/rough PIV, fingering, degradation kink), memories of past CSA, self harm, Bucky really, really fucks up.
Word Count: 4k
Previously On...: Tony sent you a very expensive apology gift.
A/N: Ya’ll are getting this early! Just one thing to say:
I am so, so sorry.
Coincidentally, this is getting posted on the day I'll be coming home from NoLa, so I'll arrive just in time to hear you all say how much you now hate me. Yay. -_-
Banner By: The absolutely amazing @mrsbuckybarnes1917!
Thank you to all those who have been reading; if you like what you've read, likes, comments, and reblogs give me life, and I truly appreciate them, and you!
Taglist: (Please let me know if you’d like to be added!) @jmeelee @cazellen @blackhawkfanatic @les-sel @marcswife21 @buckybarnessimpp @mrsbuckybarnes1917 @erelierraceala @hayjat @capswife @itsteambarnes @jupiter-107 @marygoddessofmischief @sebastians-love @learisa @lethallyprotected @rabbitrabbit12321 @buckybarnesandmarvel @fanfictiongirl77 @calwitch @fantasyfootballchampion @selella @jackiehollanderr @wintercrows @sashaisready @missvelvetsstuff @angelbabyyy99 @keylimebeag @maybefoxysouls @vicmc624 @sashaisready @j23r23 @wintercrows @crist1216 @cjand10 @doublejeon @pattiemac1
You weren’t sure how long you sat there, lost in the dark colors, the reflection of the moonlight over the water. The sound of the door opening broke through your thoughts, and you turned to see Bucky shuffle into the room. 
“Hey, sweets,” he said, toeing off his boots.
“Hey,” you said without emotion, turning your face back to  the painting.
“Whacha lookin’ at?” he asked, coming to sit next to you on the couch.
“Apology gift from Tony.”
“What’s he apologizing to you for?” God, you couldn’t even muster up the energy to be angry at him.
“Calling out your unhealthy obsession with Jade in front of the team,” you said, voice flat. 
“I do not have an unhealthy obsession with Vix,” Bucky said, annoyance coloring his words. “How many times do I have to tell you there’s nothing going on between the two of us before you start believing me.” 
“Maybe you should stop telling me there’s nothing and start actually acting like there’s nothing,” you said as you stood up. “Because honestly, I’m tired of hearing your empty words.” You began to walk away, but Bucky reached out and grabbed your arm.
“They aren’t empty, Pocket!” he said. His voice wasn’t loud, but it filled the room as if he’d shouted. “It fucking hurts like hell to hear you say that.”
“Oh, I’m so sorry.” You couldn’t help the sarcasm that oozed from your voice now. “Your feelings are hurt now, so that changes everything. Let me put aside the pain I’ve been dealing with for months to reassure you.” You yanked your hand free from his grasp. “I’m exhausted, Bucky. Nothing is getting better. In fact, things are getting worse, and I keep pretending that I can be okay with things, but you just keep picking her over me, time and time again. I don’t deserve that. Not from someone who’s supposed to love me.”
“Pick her over you? That’s fucking bullshit and you know it,” he said, voice rising.
“Is it?” you asked him. You pointed to the corner where your overnight bags sat waiting for a trip you’d never take. “Is that bullshit, Bucky? Cause we were supposed to be in the Catskills right now, but because that fucking cunt came crying for you, you went running to her and left me sitting here, alone and forgotten. Again.”
“Pocket,” Bucky ran a hand over the back of his neck, a sure sign you were ruffling him. “She needed someone to support her. She’s not like you– she doesn’t–”
“Oh, shut the fuck up, Barnes!” you interrupted, shouting now. “I’m trying to tell you that I’m breaking up with you because of her and you still just stand there and defend her!”
Bucky’s face paled and his eyes went wide. “No,” he said, his voice barely audible.
“What?” You weren’t sure you heard him.
“I said ‘no,’” he said, his voice louder, but still soft. “You're not breakin' up with me. Doll, please. I need you. You said you were gonna fight for us, fight for me. That’s what you said!”
“I’m so tired of fighting for you when you’re off fighting for her! I can’t do this anymore, Bucky,” you practically sobbed. “You are fucking destroying me and feel like you just. don’t. care. I can’t just sit here and let it keep happening. You say you need me, but you’ve made it clear time and time again that you don’t give a shit about what I need. Every time I’ve asked you to put a boundary between you and Carthage, you’ve stomped right over it. And I can’t keep living like this. Yesterday was supposed to be a celebration of one of the greatest accomplishments of my career, and she ruined it.”
“It wasn’t her fault she got bad intel!” Bucky shouted.
“Could you just FUCKING STOP?!” you screamed. “Stop defending her! She either royally fucked up or she set them up on purpose! Those are the only two options! Either way, the entire thing was her fault. Rhodey is unconscious– almost died– because of her! She’s got you so wrapped around her fucking finger that you can’t even see it, and I am SO. GOD. DAMNED. OVER. IT! You promised me you’d make it up to me,” you continued shouting at him. “You fucking promised! But as soon as she bats her lashes, your promises don’t mean shit! You keep making excuses, you keep saying you’re sorry, but you keep doing the same fucking thing over and over again, and the only thing your actions are promising is that she means more to you than I do!”
“That’s not true!” he shouted back at you. “You mean more to me than anything!”
“I don’t fucking believe you!” you screamed, your voice going hoarse.
“I’ll fucking prove it to you!” He grabbed your elbows and pulled you to him, kissing you with such force it would have knocked you over if he hadn’t been holding you up. The moment he broke the kiss for air, you slapped him across the face. Only to immediately kiss him again.
Within seconds, you were ripping at each other’s clothes, desperate to feel one another, skin to skin, your tongues battling against each other as though whomever could dominate the kiss could win your fight. Bucky literally tore your shirt in half before you pushed him down onto your bed. Crawling on top of him, you scratched your nails down his chest, hard enough to draw blood.
Bucky hissed into your mouth, reaching down to yank off his pants and boxer briefs. You hastily pulled them down and off his legs before climbing back up to his mouth. Your kisses were passionate, angry and feral, each of you trying to prove a point to the other. 
You felt both of Bucky’s hands grasp the waistband of your jeans and rip them open, sending the button and zipper teeth flying. “Those were my favorite fucking jeans,” you warned.
“I’ll buy you another pair,” he growled, shoving a hand into your panties and finding your clit. You arched your back as he pinched and rolled it between his fingers, the aggression in his movements igniting your blood. You gasped as he shoved two fingers into you while simultaneously flipping you so you were now on your back and he loomed above you.
He pulled his hand from you, leaving you aching and empty. He kissed you as he divested you of what was left of your jeans and your panties. “Taste yourself,” he said, shoving his fingers into your mouth. You sucked on them, savoring the tang of your essence on his skin. Bucky groaned at the sight before pulling his fingers out and kissing you again. 
“You’re mine,” he growled, grabbing at your breasts and roughly kneading the flesh. “Look at me, Pocket. You’re mine.” You turned your head away, not wanting to meet his eyes, but Bucky would have none of it. Gripping your chin tight enough to leave a bruise, he yanked your head back so you were looking him in the eye. “I said, you’re mine.” He entered you then, the force of it nearly splitting you in half. “You’re mine and I’m fucking yours. Forever.”
He pounded into you as if his very life depended on it, and you clutched at his shoulders for dear life. “God, yes, Bucky,” you cried, all your resolve finally leaving you as the pleasure rose within you. “I’m yours, and you’re mine. Only mine. Only fucking mine!”
With a roar, Bucky picked up one of your legs and draped it over his shoulder, the new angle allowing him to hit you deeper as he drove into you. His thrusts were punishing, as though he were trying to see just how deep he could get himself inside of you before you actually broke in two.
"You like that?" he murmured as he rutted his hips into you.
"Fuck, yes, please, Bucky-- just like that," you moaned. He had you close. So, so close. "Keep going."
"Yeah, I thought so, you dirty slut," he grunted.
"What?" you asked, pulling your head back into the pillow so you could stare at him, wide-eyed as he continued to pound relentlessly into you. His words had taken you aback-- this was not something your loving boyfriend had ever said to you before. You dropped one leg from around his waist and tried to pull the other from his shoulder.
"Knew you loved taking my cock. God, you're such a filthy whore for me."
"Bucky, stop." You pushed gently against his chest, but he was already so far gone to his lust that he didn't seem to hear you.
"Such a good fucktoy for me," he grunted, his pace quickening as he neared his release. You felt your breath coming hard and fast now, but not from your impending climax, which had died with his words, but from an oncoming anxiety attack. “You goin’ dumb on me already, like a good little cockslut?”
Flashes of your miserable childhood flickered through your head, the way Darren would call you his "good little money-making whore" after you'd been raped by yet another of his clients, or when he decided to violate you himself, calling you his own personal slut, his special fuck toy.
"Bucky," you shouted, punching him with your fists, desperate now to get him off you, out of you. "Stop! Get off of me! GET OFF OF ME!" You screamed, thrashing at him. You saw the moment your words registered-- his eyes lost their haze of lust and his hips stopped pumping into you.
"Doll?" he asked, looking down on you in confusion. "What's wr--"
"Get off me, get off me, get off me!" you shrieked as you rolled out from under him, your entire body suddenly on fire with shame and disgust. The second your feet hit your bedroom floor, you were reaching for your silk robe, wrapping yourself in it as though the thin fabric could protect you from his words. From him.
"Pocket," Bucky watched your movements, his eyes betraying his bewilderment at your actions. "What's going on? What did I do?"
"Why would you call me that?" you asked, your words coming out in between your desperate gasps for air. "Why would you say those things?"
Bucky sat up, reaching for you, but you moved away from him. "Baby, what things? What did I s--" Realization dawned on him then, and his entire face fell. "Shit. Oh, God. Oh, Pocket. Sweetheart, I am so sorry. I didn't think--"
"Why would you say that, Bucky?" you asked, fighting back the tears that so desperately wanted to break free. "You've never called me a-a-..." you couldn't even get the word out. "How could you do that?"
"Fuck, Baby..." Bucky began, running his hands through his hair in response to your distress, "I never... I thought you'd like it. I should have realized, after Darren..."
"Don't say his name!" You hadn't meant to shout at him, but you were damned if you were going to invite the ghost of your tormentor into the sanctuary of your room. "Please," you cried, "don't say his name."
Bucky got up and tried to wrap his arms around you, but you pulled away, feeling too vile, too dirty, to even let him touch you.
"Sweetheart, please," he began, reaching for you again, "you're shaking. Let me hold you." You shook your head as you moved away from him yet again, trying to steady yourself.
"Where did that even come from, Bucky? Why would you think... What would even make you think that was something I would want?"
Bucky's hand went to rub the back of his neck as he looked up at you from behind his lashes. "I... I heard girls... like that sort of thing. That it turns them on."
"You can't just start it out of nowhere," you cried, "It's something you need to agree on first! You can't just say it without making sure your partner's okay with it! And I can't believe you'd ever think I would be okay with it! God, who even told you that?" You couldn't imagine any of Bucky's friends saying something like that to him; hell, Steve would have a coronary before even suggesting it. Did he read about it in some degrading kink group online?
"I was talking to Vix, and she said--"
"You what?" you spun to face him, your words sharp in your shock.
"Vixen. Jade. I was talking to her during training one time and she said girls like it when guys talk to them like that during sex. Well, she said she likes it. Said it, uh, turns her on."
Your entire body froze as if you'd been doused with ice water. "You were talking to Jade Carthage about sex and what gets her off." Your voice was hard and clipped. It wasn't even a question, just a statement that made your stomach twist, but you had to make sure you had understood him correctly.
"Well, when you say it like that, it sounds bad," Bucky hemmed, "but sweets, I swear, it wasn't like that."
You called for FRIDAY to turn up the lights, no longer wanting to be trapped in the intimacy of the semi-darkness with him.
"It wasn't like that? Then please enlighten me, Bucky, what was it like? Jesus, how did you two even stumble into that conversation in the first place?"
"Baby," Bucky looked frantic as he grabbed his boxer briefs from the floor and tugged them back on, "I don't even remember how we got on the subject. We were sparring and I pinned her and--"
"You had a conversation about sex while you were lying on fucking top of her?" You could barely contain your rage; you were seething, about to vibrate out of your skin with revulsion.
"Honey, it's not that big of a deal, really."
"Not that big of a deal?" you asked, knowing you were about to tread into some very dangerous territory, but needing him to understand you. "So, it wouldn't be that big of a deal if I let Steve get on top of me and had him tell me what gets him hard? What makes him come?"
Bucky's jaw tightened immediately at the mention of Steve. "Don't," he growled. "Do not bring him into this. It's completely different."
"It's not, Bucky! It's a thousand times worse! God," you threw your arms above your head as you began to pace in front of your bed. "I can't tell if you're actually this naive or if you think I'm fucking stupid."
"I don't think you're stupid, Pocket," Bucky's voice was quieter now, more restrained. "I... God, I just messed up. I'm an idiot. I didn't think it through and..." He trailed off and slumped onto the edge of the bed, his hands pushed into his hair as he stared down at the floor.
You could see his muscles craving to pull you back into his arms, but he resisted. His eyes flickered to you before darting away again, like looking at you caused him physical pain.
"Do you want to sleep with her? Were you imagining her while you were fucking me?" It was a reckless question to ask--a question that you didn’t want the answer to--but it slipped out before you could stop it.
Bucky's head whipped up, his eyes wide with shock as he stared at you. "What? No!" He stood abruptly, hands outstretched towards you. "Baby, no! God, no! I would never... I can't even believe you'd think... Don't even talk like that."
"But you took her kinks, her turn ons, and you brought them into our bed. You spoke words you knew another woman-- a woman you know I fucking loathe-- wanted to hear, you... you used them on me, knowing my history, and you didn't give a shit about what saying them might do to me!" Your voice was trembling with accusation, your body shaking with tremors of hurt and betrayal.
"No! No, sweetheart... it wasn't like that." He kept repeating himself, his words rushed, his face pale with shock and regret. "I didn't mean to disrespect you like that. I heard her say it and I thought... I mean, she's a woman too, right? So, if she liked it, I thought maybe you..." He trailed off, his expression one of sheer desperation as he tried to find the right words.
"But I'm not her. It wasn’t about pleasing me; it was about using what pleases her." You shook your head harshly, a lump forming in your throat. "You don't even see how wrong that is. And you shouldn't even have been having the conversation with her in the fucking first place!"
"What can I do?" Bucky pleaded, his voice a strained whisper as he raked his fingers through his hair again. His face was etched with pain, regret seeping from every pore of him. "How can I fix this? Tell me how to make it right."
But you were too overcome by anger and heartbreak to think straight. You moved further away from him, wrapping your arms around yourself as if you were trying to shield your heart from further damage.
“What did you tell her?” you asked, but Bucky looked at you with confusion etched across his face. “You said it was a conversation. I’m assuming she didn’t do all the talking. What did you talk about? Did you tell her what gets you off? What you like? Were you sharing intimate details about our sex life with a complete outsider? Did you tell her about your ‘sergeant’ kink?”
He didn’t need to speak for you to read the truth in the expression on his face.
The silence hung in the room, heavy and oppressive, as Bucky fought for words. A nerve twitched in his jaw, the only movement in his otherwise frozen face. After a moment of uncomfortable silence, he finally spoke.
"I... Yes, I did," he admitted, his voice a mere whisper. "I didn't think it through. I didn't mean to... I just..."
His voice trailed off again and he sunk back onto the bed, looking completely defeated. His hands covered his face as if he were desperate to hide himself from your accusing gaze.
“Get out.” You couldn’t even stand to look at him. This was a betrayal beyond anything you’d ever have expected from him. 
Bucky’s head snapped up at your words, his eyes wide with shock. He opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. He just sat there on the edge of the bed, staring at you as though he was seeing you for the first time.
"Get out," you repeated, each word a dagger. "I can't... I can't stand to even look at you right now."
Still, Bucky didn’t move. He just sat there in stunned silence, his face pale and his eyes filled with regret.
"I said get out!" Your voice was shrill, filling the room with a chilling echo that seemed to reverberate through every fiber of your being.
Bucky flinched at your tone, and finally roused himself to his feet. He looked at you one last time, his steel-blue eyes so full of pain that it made your heart ache despite everything. For a moment, it seemed like he might say something else, like he might try to explain, but you’d had enough of his ‘explanations’ for the evening. Hell, maybe for the rest of your life.
Bucky swallowed hard, his eyes filling with a mixture of fear and dread as he nodded slowly. "Okay... yeah," he stammered. "I'll give you some space."
“No. I can’t do this anymore. I’m done, Bucky. This… this is unforgivable. We’re finished.”
"Doll," he breathed, the pet name he had given you sounding like a prayer on his lips, but a curse to your ears. "I love you... I'm sorry. I messed up, I know. But I love you."
“I don’t believe you.” You felt like your heart was being ripped apart as you watched him standing there, consumed by remorse. You had never seen him like this before, his usual charismatic confidence replaced with fearful uncertainty.
“Just go,” you whispered, turning away so you wouldn't have to see the pain in his eyes. You felt a sob rising in your throat, but you held it back, refusing to let it out while he was still there.
With every inch of him screaming resistance, Bucky walked over to the door and hesitated at the threshold. "I'll... I'll do anything to make this right, sweetheart," he promised, his voice choked with emotion. "I'll fix this... We can fix this."
But you remained silent, your back still turned to him as you tried desperately to keep your tears at bay. The sound of the door opening and closing behind him was deafening in its finality.
You wrapped your arms around yourself tighter, suddenly feeling cold. The room was suddenly too big, too empty without Bucky's reassuring presence. You sunk onto the bed, burying your head in your hands as the events of the night washed over you with overwhelming force as you began to sob in earnest.
You weren't even sure what you were angriest about. He’d broken yet another promise and left you waiting, your romantic getaway forgotten so he could be by her side. He'd called you a slut and a whore. He’d discussed your sex life with Jade-- the one woman you hated above all others, and openly discussed her kinks with her, and his own desires in return. He'd forced her kinks on you without your consent.
And then there was the worst part of it all, the bit that made you feel sick and hollow: he'd failed to see what he'd done wrong.
You had thought Bucky knew you better, that he respected you more than this. You'd shared secrets and fears with him, things you'd never shared with anyone else, not even Tony. He knew your past, knew how much trust meant to you - knew how difficult it had been for you to open your vulnerabilities up to something more than just casual sex - and yet he'd violated that trust in such a profound way.
This was just beyond anything else that had come before it. You couldn’t see a way to move forward after this.
Numbly, you began to strip off the sheets from the bed, your hands shaking as you balled them up and threw them into a corner of the room. You couldn't sleep on them now, nor ever again. You couldn't bear the thought of lying down where he'd... where he'd...
Tears started to spill down your cheeks as the reality of what had happened set in. You tried to blink them away, tried to swallow down the lump in your throat. But it was too late. Tears blinded you as you moved through your space on muscle memory alone, grabbing a garbage bag from under the sink in the kitchenette and shoving the offending sheets into it to dispose of later. Boiling them in chlorine wouldn't be able to relieve them of the taint they now carried.
Once the offending sheets were securely bagged and out of sight, you stumbled your way into the bathroom. Turning the shower on as hot as it would go, you stripped from your robe and stepped under the scalding stream from the waterfall shower head.
Hissing as the water hit your body, you let yourself succumb to your emotions. You reached for your loofah and began scrubbing at your skin, doing everything in your power to wash away the intense feeling of shame that had permeated deep under your dermis. You scrubbed until your skin was red, until it was raw and cracked and bleeding, but it offered you no relief.
The sensations were familiar, the burning heat, the stinging of newly torn flesh. It had been so long since you had felt the need to ritually cleanse yourself like this, you had desperately hoped you'd finally found yourself beyond the need to do so, but just a few words from Bucky's mouth had sent you reeling backwards, back to being that worthless, vile, used up girl that no number of college degrees, fancy company titles, or board-approved computer programs could fully erase. It was in your DNA, and you couldn't escape it. You scrubbed and scrubbed until time had lost meaning.
<- Previous Part / Next Part ->
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frvnkcastles · 27 days
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I'd love to give you and idea for like a part 2 to your reader that struggles with reading and air control? Maybe reader is home alone and frank is out with Matt on rooftopsand matt hears you singing with perfect control and brings frank closer so he can hear? Frank flicks her a text asking if she can fix 3 plates for dinner as he's gonna bring a guest and they come in through the fire escape. Matt's being a flirty prick and it gets Frank's hackles up where he ends up telling him eat and gtfo of our place and the reader just beam
(The reader had a perfect rasp to ding along to Teddy Swims? Please)
BURN A LITTLE BRIGHTER TONIGHT ➵ F. CASTLE
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Summary: Frank brings Matt over for dinner, only to regret it sooner rather than later.
Warnings: Mostly just fluff, jealous Frank, feminine nicknames, language
Word count: 1.6k
Author’s note: Anon, thank you so much for being patient with me, I know I took a long time with this and I do feel really bad about it! I hope you like it <3
Frank was still firmly of the opinion that him and Matt were not friends. But begrudgingly, he had to admit that he had grown to tolerate the guy — enough to invite him over for dinner. The two had been working together for the past couple of nights and despite their differences on how to approach the criminals they had been tracking, they had gotten the job done. In the process Frank had also learned more about Matt than he would have preferred, but upon realizing that the man was a little lonely lately, he reluctantly extended an offer to get some food and beer in him. He could be an asshole, but he considered himself incredibly lucky to share a life with you, and he pitied Matt for not having that same luxury.
He just didn’t realize that bringing Matt to you would involve the man getting overly eager about you.
”Huh, what is it?” Frank queried when Matt suddenly stopped on the rooftop, his head tilted curiously to listen closely, and it got Frank alert in an instant. They had taken care of a bunch of crooks already, but he was prepared to fight some more if necessary, and as much was obvious from the way he quickly reached for his gun.
”Listen”, was all Matt said, not explaining a single thing, and it earned a displeased grunt from Frank. He hated how vague the man could be — especially when he didn’t have the same hyper-sensitive hearing that Matt seemed to flaunt.
But when he gave in and focused, he could hear exactly what Matt had stopped for. It was a singing voice that could only be described as enchanting and impressive… and it belonged to you. Frank had heard you sing the occasional catchy jingle or a few lyrics from your favorite song, enough for him to recognize it, but he had never witnessed it like this. It was so carefree and glorious, with no restraints or worries about anyone hearing, and it made his heart leap in his chest. You always found new ways to amaze him, to make him fall for you just a little harder, and it melted his tough exterior as he listened in.
”That’s my girl”, Frank breathed out, both praising and surprised, his eyes wide and his hand dropping from the gun hidden in the waistband of his pants. He was captivated by your voice, and he almost forgot about Matt next to him, only for the man in red to cut through his daze.
”Does she know we’re on our way?” he asked, and snapping out of his admiration for you, Frank glanced at him.
”Shit, no, I didn’t text her yet. Gimme a moment”, he grumbled, digging out his phone and typing a quick message to you to inform that he was coming home and bringing Matt with him. It had become your little routine to cook for him so he wouldn’t have to start from scratch or eat from a can, and he appreciated it greatly — sometimes, he tried putting up a fight about it, insisting that it wasn’t fair for you to be doing all the work, but you loved taking care of him. Tonight, he hoped, you wouldn’t mind an extra plate at the table.
Only moments after he had sent the message, the singing ceased, and Frank figured you didn’t want to be caught in the act. His heart swelled in his chest, wondering if it would be appropriate for him to bring up your voice because he truly thought it was beautiful. Still, he didn’t want to make you uncomfortable.
You were all smiles when Matt and Frank came in through the fire escape, wiping your hands in a kitchen towel and taking in their appearance in the worry that one of them was injured. Frank could read your face easily, and he was quick to reassure you.
”We’re alright, sweetheart”, he rasped while stepping over to you, cradling your head so he could plant a soft kiss on your forehead. ”Shouldn’t be leavin’ the window open”, he chastised you gently, his tone firm but loving.
You chuckled and squeezed his shoulder. ”I have to, ’cause my boyfriend doesn’t know how to use a door”, you countered, earning a gruff laugh from Frank. As he went to hang up his jacket by the front door, you turned to Matt who was taking off his mask and ruffling his hair. ”I hope you like pasta carbonara, I made plenty for all of us”, you announced with a soft smile.
”It’s perfect. Thank you for having me. You’re very kind”, Matt nodded with gratitude, delighting you. Frank in turn gave him a suspicious look — on one hand, he wanted you to be appreciated, but on the other, he had very little tolerance for anyone, but especially Matt, sweet-talking his girl.
You helped Matt to the dining table and with Frank’s help, got plates for all three of you. You had barely dug into the food when Matt was speaking up again, mentioning the topic that Frank had purposefully dodged for now.
”I must say, you’re a wonderful singer”, he began, and with an open mouth, you glanced between him and Frank, surprised that he had heard you. Then again, he did have a particular talent for catching things most people never would.
”Oh—I—thank you, that’s sweet”, you rambled, caught a little off-guard, and Frank noticed it in your nervous smile.
”Uh, yeah, we heard ya, darlin’. He’s right, though, you’re… you’re real talented. I loved it”, Frank cut in, a genuine look in his eyes. It grounded you, and with a slow nod, you reached for his hand across the table and held on tightly. He could tell you hadn’t been prepared to receive praise on the matter, so he opened his mouth to change the subject, but Matt beat him to it.
”Truly, you’ve got an amazing voice”, he continued, making Frank glare at him in a way that surely he could feel in his bones. But whether or not he did, he still wasn’t done. ”I’m sure it’s as beautiful as the rest of you”, Matt went on with a knowing smirk on his face. Heat crawled to your cheeks and you didn’t really know what to say — Frank, however, had had about enough.
”Alright, quit it, Red. It ain’t your job to make her feel special”, he warned him, zero amusement in his stare as he chomped down some more pasta, perfectly balancing his meal with the mean look in his eyes. He knew you could handle yourself, and with any other guy, he would have let you do just that, but Matt was a different story. He got under Frank’s skin far too easily, sometimes probably on purpose, and he wasn’t going to entertain his little attempts to charm you.
”I’m just saying, Frank’s a very lucky guy to be with you”, he spoke once more, and at that, your boyfriend finally snapped.
”Fuckin’ hell, Red. That’s it. Finish the food and get the fuck out, yeah?” he declared curtly, not taking no for an answer. ”Goddamn, I went out of my way to invite you and you pull this shit…”, he muttered to himself, poking at the food with his fork angrily.
You couldn’t help but smile carefully, touched that Frank was so serious about you, even if you had been seconds away from telling Matt to take it easy and back off. Frank had nothing to worry about, but you still loved seeing how protective he was of you.
The rest of the meal went by in awkward silence, but Matt made sure to thank you once more before leaving. He made so with haste, not wanting to stick around for any longer than necessary in case Frank would punch him out of the door, and you didn’t blame him. The tension in the room was immensely obvious and as soon as Matt had left, you gravitated over to Frank who was scrubbing the dishes with vicious force.
”Think you scared him off for good”, you mentioned, and with a snort, Frank shrugged.
”Good. Teaches him not to flirt with my girl”, he scoffed, putting an amused smile on your face. You stood on your tiptoes and kissed his cheek, which threatened to break his solemn expression.
”You’re cute when you get all jealous”, you noted, and finally, Frank looked over to you, his face telling you that he didn’t like being called jealous. In fact, he didn’t like acting jealous, either, but it seemed Matt brought out the worst in him.
Instead of protesting, Frank returned to another topic. ”Really surprised me with that voice of yours, darlin’. How come I ain’t ever hear you sing like that?” he wondered, dropping the dish brush in the sink and placing both hands on your hips. He pulled you in closer, his tall frame looming over you and his dark eyes full of curiosity and affection for you — clearly, you had managed to burst the angry bubble around him.
You grew shy and shrugged. ”I dunno. It’s just a random thing I do, I guess. I usually do it when I’m cooking or cleaning and most times that happens when I’m home alone”, you explained, and with an understanding nod, Frank reached to brush your hair away from your face.
”I think it’s fuckin’ incredible. You’re amazin’ at everythin’ you do, sweetheart. Would love it if you sang more, y’know? I gotta hear it”, he pointed out, a tender smile touching upon his lips as he looked at you.
”Okay”, you whispered, ”thank you, Frank.” You had been a little embarrassed to be caught singing at first, but hearing Frank say all those things brought your walls down, and it certainly meant a lot more coming from him rather than from Matt.
”Attagirl”, he kissed the top of your head, ”and I ain’t lettin’ that asshole Red hear it again.”
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captainfern · 8 months
Text
fern rant below lol
yk one thing i have noticed both on tiktok, here and the rest of the internet is the “pornification” of media
by that i mean the standards people are being held to in regards of sexual attraction or just “beauty standards in general” and how there is this sudden increase of ideals and values built on the foundation of toxic pornography
i mean there are several examples, but the most common ideals you see typically relate to someone’s body and someone’s body hair and i have a bit to say on the matter, especially as someone who creates “pornographic” content
let’s talk body first
you are beautiful. it does not matter whether the internet perceives you as anything more or less than that. you are beautiful exactly the way you are
the pornification of modern media will tell you that you have to look a certain way. you will be told you can’t be plus-size, or you can’t be too skinny, or you can’t be tall, or you can’t lack curves, or you can’t have hyperpigmentation, etc. don’t listen to that bullshit
you are beautiful and i luv you
i don’t want to see negative body image portrayed in fanfic: x reader’s can be plus-size, they can be tall, they can have no curves. they are x reader for a reason !!! the reader should be described as little as possible !!!
and in saying that, yeah, your favourite fictional characters would fuck a bigger person. they’d fuck a taller person. they’d love you for you and be completely and utterly obsessed with you. “but actually— 🤓☝️” shut up please <3
now body hair
its natural !!! it grows !!!
if you don’t wanna shave, don’t shave. if you wanna shave, shave. baby it’s your choice. do what YOU want. don’t let anybody else influence you and your body
the pornification of modern media has really fucked this kind of thinking up because people (a lot of men unfortunately) think they can dictate the way people / women present themselves ??? gtfo what lmao
“body hair is nasty, body hair is unnatural, body hair is unhygienic”— honey please don’t. it’s not any of these things. body hair is completely ok (and so is not wanting it on you ofc— as long as it’s your decision, not the persuasion of anyone else)
i saw a tiktok of these guys being like “oh i’d never have sex with someone who didn’t shave” and “ew i’d never eat hairy puss” brother you literally suck (it’s ok to have preference, but don’t make it out to be vile or weird or something other people have to agree with)
it’s natural. it’s normal. it’s perfectly hygienic if you keep it that way. if you meet someone like the guys i mentioned above, they ain’t worth your time
and yeah, john price and simon riley and johnny mactavish and kyle garrick would fuck you and eat you out if you didn’t shave cause they’re MEN
love yourself because you’re beautiful and i’m telling you so right now !!!
i felt the need to say this as i write pornography. i write x readers. i try to keep everything regarding body as neutral as possible (and if i ever fuck up, please let me know !!)
i often write about “fat” or “flesh” in my writing but that’s because i don’t see a lot of fics with it. if you want something different, specify in a request and i will write your request more to your liking <3 i want everyone to feel accepted and welcome here because it’s important !!!
on that note, you won’t catch me writing about “bare pussy” or “hairless legs” or whatever. i try to keep it all up to your imagination !!! (you will find hairy men tho !!! the lads i write for will always be hairy but that’s cause i’m a whore)
anyway i luv you and you are so so so beautiful and i hope you have an amazing day / night wherever you may be
this post is not an attack or anything of the sort. i’m just speaking my mind :)
lots of luv <3
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harrysfolklore · 1 year
Note
hiii, could you do a part 2 to taylor giaviasis blurb??? she just had a baby girl and it would be top tier dadrry content 🥹
here it is ! some dad!harry for the soul 🥹 i hope you like it
CHECK OUT PART ONE | MY PATREON
ask me anything | masterlist | likes and reblogs are appreciated !
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liked by harrystyles, annetwist and 605,736 others
yourinstagram Our family is getting bigger 😭🎉Baby #2 is on the way ! Can’t believe bubs is going to be a big brother 🥺
view all 43,973 comments
harryfan1 OMG HARRY WILL BE A DAD AGAIN
jefezoff I love this family so much ♥️
gemmastyles I can’t believe I’m going to be an auntie again I’m losing my mind
harrystyles Thank you for making me a daddy again, there’s no one else in this world I would want this with x
harryfan2 OMFGG I HOPE THEY HAVE A BABY GIRL
harryfan3 harry is going to have his second child i feel so old right now
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liked by selenagomez, yourinstagram and 9,836,625 others
harrystyles Three become four x
view all 278,726 comments
harryfan1 CONGRATULATIONS HARRY
taylorswift Congratulations 💖 Much love to your beautiful family, I can’t wait to start knitting blankets for the little squish on the way 🥲
↳ harryfan2 TAYLOR ????
↳ taylorfan1 “cold was the steel of my axe to grind for the boys who broke my heart, now i send their babies presents” 🥹
adele ♥️
harryfan3 OKAY BUT HARRY STYLES FATHER OF TWO ???? HELL YES
billieeilish Where do i sign up to be part of this family??😩
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liked by jefezoff, yourinstagram and 135,866 others
zanelowe A very special conversation with @harrystyles on paternity, music and balancing personal life and the spotlight. Coming this Monday at 10am pt. @applemusic
[LINK TO THE BLURB ABOUT THE INTERVIEW]
view all 12,037 comments
harryfan1 OHHH
harryfan2 i can’t wait to listen to this
harryfan3 i know zane wouldn’t fail us
harryfan4 YEEES
YN’S INSTAGRAM STORIES
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//
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liked by harryfan1, harryfan2 and 2,836 others
dilfrrystyles WE MET HARRY TODAY !! we asked him how was yn doing and his reply was "she's amazing, getting more gorgeous by the second" and he also said that they might know what they're having soon and he's excited MY HEART I CANT BELIEVE THIS HAPPENED
view all 968 comments
harryfan1 OMFG CONGRATS
harryfan2 AHH I LOVE FATHER HARRY
harryfan3 knowing him, he won't tell us what they're having
harryfan4 i still can't belive he's going to have another child
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liked by harrystyles, lizzobeeating and 607,836 others
yourinstagram Put your favorite baby girl names down below 🌸
view all 43,983 comments
harryfan1 OH MY GOOOOD
annetwist I love my little girl already ❤️
harryfan2 HARRY STYLES GIRL DAD OMFG
harrystyles She’s not allowed to have boyfriends already
↳ harryfan3 he’s going to be one of those annoying dads lol
jefezoff Jeffrina
↳ harryfan1 WHAT THE HELL 😭😭😭
↳ yourinstagram GTFO
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liked by niallhoran, yourinstagram and 8,736,903 others
harrystyles It’s coming to an end, and it’s almost time to meet our baby girl. As you reach the final stage of your pregnancy, I can’t help but be in awe of you. You’re the best mom to our bubba and you’ll be the best mom to our little girl. Thank you for putting up with the changes in your body, the hormones and pain. I love you, and I admire you.
view all 248,635 comments
harryfan1 HAAAARRRYYYY
lukehemmings 🥺🥺🥺💓
gemmastyles I love you both so much
harryfan2 if my husband doesn’t love me like this i’m divorcing
yourinstagram I’m a very, very pregnant woman about to pop and this doesn’t help with the hormones at all, i love you 🥲
harryfan3 THE BABY MUST BE COMING REALLY SOOOON
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liked by harryfan1, harryfan2 and 28,937 others
celebrityleaks Harry Styles photographed outside a hospital today in London. It’s most likely that his daughter was born this weekend
view all 9,736 comments
harryfan1 FUCK PAPS
harryfan2 come on be respectful give them some privacy
harryfan3 harry is officially a father of two ???
harryfan4 this is not the way news should’ve come out ://
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liked by harrystyles, pillowpersonpp and 897,637 others
yourinstagram Two weeks ago after five hours of labor my baby girl entered the world. Birth is a wild yet magical thing. Thank you to my doctors, midwife, family and friends for all that you did for me. And most importantly, thank you to my life partner for making this child with me, for physically holding me up while i brought her to the world and for being the best father to grace this earth.
view all 51,826 comments
harryfan1 OHHHH MY GOD
pillowpersonpp 🥺🥺🥺💓
harryfan2 HARRY IS A FATHER OF TWO
harrystyles There’s no one I would rather have as a life partner. Thank you for being the mother of my children. You’re the love of my life
↳ harryfan3 HARRYYYYY STOP
gemmastyles Bubba is going to be the best big brother ever 🥺🥺 my babies ❤️
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liked by arianagrande, yourinstagram and 8,903,826 others
harrystyles My daughter has been part of our world for two weeks. Bubba is in love with his little sister and he’s willing to do anything for her and that’s such a sight to see. I feel like the luckiest man on the planet because this is my family. Thank you to everyone who has sent out love and joyous wishes, my family feels your love every day.
view all 203,836 comments
harryfan1 HARRY ILYSM
selenagomez Much love to your beautiful family ✨
harryfan2 i can’t believe he has two kids now
yourinstagram Thank you for giving me the family of my dreams, hubby
↳ harryfan3 STOP IT RIGHT NOW
lukehemmings 💖💖💖
taglist: @cucciolafaerie @eleanordaisy @sunflowersndpeaches @golden-hoax @alienorknight @daydreamingofmatilda @ivyproblems @ayeshathestyles s @stylesmygucci @gimsaysay @rosaliedepp @dontworrysunflower @milfrrynation @manifestrry @iceebabies @harrystylesrecs @pleasingrryyy y @harianaswhore @noitsmebecky @abeanontoast t @grapejuice-rry @vrittivsanghavi @msolbesg @tati813 @sad1esgf @itsgabbysblog @theekyliepage @watermelonsugacry @be-with-me-so-happily @a-strange-familiar @reveriehs @musicforcinemas @harrybabyyyyyyy @tinydeskwriter @noooovaaaaa @tenaciousperfectionunknown @mxltifxnd0m @rach2602 @balletdancerry @b-reads-things @juiceboxrry @lomlolivia @itsgigikay @goldensstateofgrace @missmielyhoran @fdl305 @lightsoutstyles
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honeytama · 3 months
Text
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ok i knowww i should be writing smth else or doing laundry or napping BUT mean! matt x fem!reader
smutty 18+ thoughts under the cut
cw: degradation
i’m thinking! your matt’s gf, have been for maybe X number of months, and things have been pretty vanilla so far,, which surprised you at first considering the number of times you confided in him in your kinks and fetishes,, different positions you liked,, toys you liked to use,, etc etc
but he just never would share anything about his sexual fantasies?
when you would tell him yours, he would say smth like “oh, that’s cool” or “oh i didn’t know you were into that” or “ok maybe we can try a little bit of that tonight” but not much else and then move on from the subject
sooooo one day, yall are out and about and ending the night with a nice dinner… and the older couple beside you is being complete assholes to their server?!
matt starts off with an eye roll
and then matt’s talking to you LOUDLY about how their being fucking annoying and should just finish their food and leave
and then starts to blatantly stare at them hoping they notice him and get embarrassed
and when they do finish their meal? the server returns to the table to ask if they meant to not leave a tip on their expensive ass bill…
matt’s up from his seat and fuming , nearly red in the face, and practically barking at the couple to tip the nice young lady or GTFO. they end up cowering with their tails between their legs and matt huffs.
he pulls out his wallet to hand their server a fifty before returning to his meal with you, “baby, sorry, they were pissing me off.”
he holds his hand in yours across the table, “i hope i didn’t embarrass you.”
you don’t even feel embarrassed. you’re proud. and frankly extremely horny.
knowing matt for some time, being friends before dating and such,,, you know he has a mean streak; he likes to fight, likes to be a dick. and mostly it’s in good fun, especially with you.
but since you’ve started being his girlfriend it went away ? he hates everyone BUT you. you’re his sweet little light.
sometimes you wish he would push you around and tease you and degrade you like he did when you were just friends…. so when you get home, you tell him that
“i didn’t know you thought that was … uh , hot and okay to do?” he stammers. “that’s what i fantasize about.”
“why haven’t you shared that?” you ask, whining.
“i was nervous i guess.. i didn’t want you to know what i really want to do to you,, with you … i just don’t want to hurt you,” he takes your face in his hands and looks directly into your eyes. “do you really want it?”
“please, matty baby…” you nod vigorously.
and with that, a switch flips
your back is pushed up against the wall of of his kitchen,, his lips instantly connecting to yours and then your neck and chest. his hands go up under the back of your dress and grip your ass cheeks hard, massaging them in his hands. he pulls away to give a hard smack to them with his palm,, you let out a needy cry :(
he laughs and holds your chin tight, “all those times you would tell me about how you wanted to be choked, to be tied up, for me spit in your mouth, for me to put it in your ass (the list goes on), i should’ve known you were a freak. i should’ve done this much sooner, knowing you liked me being mean so much.”
so you two spend that night and every other night of the week trying all the things he would hide from you in his head.
his hands around your throat
him spitting in your open mouth and onto your sopping cunt
wrapping his hands around your wrists to keep you from pushing him away as he overstimulates you into tears and shaking orgasms,, over and over again
abusing your clit with your magic wand as he pumps into you with that thick, 8incher he’s so cocky about
practicing playing with your tight little ass so that one day he can dp you himself ,,, his dick in your hole while his fingers are hooked into your pussy. or by using one of the dildos that you love so much :/
and just saying mean, mean things :( all the while you’re smiling giggling kicking your feet
“i’ll cum in your mouth, your whore cunt doesn’t deserve it” “unless you beg for it”
“such a freak, loving the feel of my hands around your pretty neck…”
“dumb slut”… “pretty little cockwhore”
in your relationship, that continues to be your dynamic. he hates everyone but you and you looooove it. matt is a sweetie to you in the streets, a meanie in the sheets lul
@exitwoundsx SIGH 😭😩
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onlyhyunjin · 3 months
Text
⋆ I love you - Park wonbin ⋆
Synopsis- you're dating a very popular celebrity which causes you to get hate since you're a "nobody" but wonbin is determined to show you and the world just how much he loves you.
Pairing- celebrity bf!wonbin x non celeb fem!reader ______________________________________________
park_wonbin just posted a photo
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liked by lee.sohee, hong_seunghan, and 1,234,843 others
park_wonbin lately
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user you look so good
hong_seunghan :)
user3 I'm obsessed with him
user8 can I bag you?
user6 he don't wan't you
user8 he don't want you either
user12 y'all fighting like he wants either of yall
jane5 how's that's shit ass company?
user4 Jane your so real for that
user1 I just wanna know what they're so interested in on hani's phone?
park_wonbin cat video's
user1 OMG wonbin replied to me
yourusername just posted a photo
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liked by danielle, phamhanni, haerinnn and 173 others
yourusername late night study sesh and a lil music
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danielle exams?
yourusername always lol
danielle this is why I'm not a med student
user7 your so beautiful
user0 being a med student sucks
user72 are you single?
yourusername if you look at my bio you can tell I'm not.
phamhanni we should've studied together
yourusername you know you don't study
phamhanni do too
user1 who is she she's really pretty?
user3 just a random
park_wonbin just posted a photo
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liked by yourusername, shotaro.saki, and 1,954,999 others
park_wonbin the boys 🖤
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user1 my visual kings
user3 I LOVE YOU GUYS ♥️
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user8 my 7
liked by creator
user55 obsessed with these men
user2 잘 생긴 남자들
(handsome boys)
shotaro.saki 🖤
user87 my favorites
user21 oppa be my boyfriend?
user55 girl GTFO
user12 lmaooo
yourusername just posted a photo
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liked by phamhanni, hhyein, haerinnn and 274 others
yourusername first week of summer break 🌞
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phamhanni Hawaii was fun!!
yourusername let's do it again soon
user98 still with this mystery man?
yourusername always.
user98 cute ig
yourcousin I still wanna meet him it's been 2 years.
yourusername soon I promise
yourcousin you better keep your word lol
user25 cute pics!
yourusername thank uuu
phamhanni besties for the resties
yourusername my day 1
User77 the boy looks familiar
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park_wonbin just posted a photo
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liked by lee.sohee, yourusername, phamhanni, and 1,000,000
park_wonbin late night studio sesh 🎧
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hong_seunghan best feeling
user4 what you working on?
user1 cooking up new music?
user99 new album when?
user8 another song with his beautiful vocals pls!!
user2 can't wait
user I just know the new song is gonna be good
user55 !!!
user84 haniii
user21 this is random but wonder what his coffee order is?
user91 okay but the studio?
yourusername just added a photo
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yourusername late night coffee date p.s he's a cutie!
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haerinnn cuteeeee
yourusername 😘
danielle I hate being single :(
yourusername I'll find someone for youu
danielle no thank you I actually enjoy it
phamhanni when's the wedding?
yourusername lol
minjeong._. so glad I introduced y'all
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#1rinaa my babiess
yourusername 🤭🤭
user3 something looks familiar here
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aeriiii 🤮 couple (y'all so cute)
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ningx2 cringeeee
yourusername stay mad bae
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liked by user3, user8, user99 and 1,632,838 others
Dispatch Riize Wonbin spotted on multiple dates with a non-celeb lady what are your opinions on this?
user3 noooo he really has a girlfriend :(
user12 so happy for him if this is true!!
user8 oppa seriously she looks disgusting
User938 your literally disgusting
user99 the dates looks so cuteee
user6 I'm disappointed in him for dating her
user38 embarrassing behavior
user4 I can't really tell the photos are so blurry I can't see the guys face that well but if he is dating congratulations 👏🏻
user last pic is the cutest
user272 I don't believe it you can't even see the guy plus wonbin wouldn't like that girl
user76 your embarrassing yourself
user838 she's not even pretty
user4 you just mad it ain't you
User12 literally like grow up
user90 these comments by some people are nasty
User636 I know it's really sad to see
User042 I kinda hope it's true I love to see idols dating.
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@onlyhyunjin. Do not steal, copy, plagiarize, or translate my work, especially without my consent.
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murfpersonalblog · 4 months
Text
IWTV S2 Ep3 Musings - Daniel & the Talamasca (SPOILERS)
I can see what the reviewers meant when they complained about the Talamasca & Daniel.
We start off with Daniel nervous AF, tryna keep tabs on all the mindscrewy shenanigans (at the sushi restaurant on his lunchbreak or whatever).
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Today's... etcetc Cell phones, google -- Daniel, your handwriting effing sucks. San Francisco. Polynesian Mary's Playboy magazines as a doorstop? doorstep? |CLAUDIA| Mary's cab. Coke...etcetc. Alice. They'll come for me and Kate next--you bet your arse they will! XD THIS TIME I WON'T SAVE YOUR LIFE
He draws an arrow from Save Your Life up to Playboy--I assume cuz those are two incidents with Armand that took place in SanFran?
I really like the Omakase bit--
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About how many risks Daniel's subjecting himself to under the whims of these vampires--but also about Daniel's hubris/arrogance breaking the rules of engagement by thinking he has any say over what they do and what he gets out of it, by stepping onto their turf. If you can't take the heat, GTFO their kitchen.
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I'm only just now noticing the foreshadowed titles of Dan's books. 🤦 Burning & Blood--AMC swears they're hilarious.
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OK, Raglan's been stalking Daniel's career just like Louis did. So my early suspicion about Daniel breaking the NDA was right.
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Which is SO EFFING STUPID OF HIM. They're gonna find out! Loumand's literally drawing out this giant tragedy about what happens when vampires--Armand, specifically--are LIED to, and you're gonna pull this mess on them!? You're not even being SUBTLE!
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AGREEMENT.pdf--Daniel, you in danger girl.
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Raglan, stop tryna gas Dan up b4 they put him off commission permanently. He's no body-snatching psychic CROOK like you.
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Get this nosey bish offa my dang screen.
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Oof, right in the Devil's Minion feels. U_U
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O__O WOAH!? OK, so aside from Dan (played by EB, a white Jew, along with JK) throwing shade at Caucasian European Israelis (which we been knew), he's implying that Armand & Louis might be persons of interest in the UAE by the Israeli gov't & assassins, esp. cuz of their ties to powerful people. But it's funny cuz that's the exact same thing Lou asked about him.
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So Dan's telling the sushi patrons there's Israeli spies/assassins crawling around Dubai--STOP, b4 you get that place John Wick'd! XD
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Not MI6. 😭 I said JOHN WICK, not JAMES BOND. XD
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Raglan's gone full rogue then--if he was still working for the Talamasca he'd have darn near unlimited funds--they got that dirty TEMPLAR money. 💰💰💰
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Yeah, and they don't actually call the Talamasca by name in the ep itself--only in the Insider interviews the producers give.
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Daniel, why TF are you talking SO EFFING LOUD, when Raglan's whispering, tryna act like he's on the phone NOT talking to you in case y'all ARE being bugged. 🤦 SUBTLETY, my guy. What kinda investigative journalist are you?
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I'm starting to suspect they're not gonna do the rockstar!Lestat, and instead this stupid Great Conversion's gonna be what wakes up Akasha/Amel, when their blood/consciousness gets stretched way too thin with all these new vamps being made.
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To attempt an interview...? I believe that. We already know Marius & Lestat stalked Talamasca members for decades upon decades. Ain't no way NO vampire ever tried getting close to humans & talk about their lives to someone out of loneliness or something. Esp. the ones not attached to the European covens & all their stupid Great Laws.
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Rest in Preternaturalism, Raymond Gallant.
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BLENDERS! XD But this is THE most Anne Ricean answer imaginable, cuz everyone lost their ish when she had her vamps flying around with GPS-trackable cellphones in their pockets as they KILLED people. Rookie mistake. 😂
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Armand was on a cellphone in S01E07, and he is LITERALLY married to his iPad, so PLEASE, sir. 🙄
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There's Santiago's COMPLICIT speech coming back. Ain't no moral high-ground here!
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And I figured Armand/AMC was gonna pin it on AMC!Lestat, and his jaded version the Savage Garden.
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Armand says technology distracts humans from vampire crimes, but what's distracting vampires from psychic/Talamasca crimes, huh?
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ISTG these are the laziest vamps I've ever seen; they care so much about their privacy & security, but aren't reading Dan's mind at all? I hope one of them just casually name-drops Raglan or catches Daniel in the act or something.
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Raglan said Daniel's laptop was "comically vulnerable," and uploads a bunch of data files on it from the Bibliotheca Talamasca bestiary/archives--WHY? To help show Daniel he's helpful & trustworthy?
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RJ: Omakase? Louis: The conversation was easy and flirtatious.... Armand: And combative. Louis: And combative, yes. Daniel: Arguing as foreplay. RJ: Peruse at your leisure.
I hate this effing show. 🙇🙇🙇
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emilynyaaa · 1 year
Text
My pinned post~
Open to suggestions and critisms on how to upgrade this post
Hi, I'm Emily, trans girl, AMAB | Polyamorous, Pansexual/Omnisexual | 21 | She/her/it Anonymous asks has been turned off, but like, if you wanna send something and not have it post tell me (or just dm me instead)
__________________________________________
If you're a minor, you shouldn't be here, this blog will have a lot of hornyposting and 18+ content. That means you either block me, or don't follow me. TERFS, homophobes, fascists, and any other kind of hateful people i haven't mentioned, GTFO __________________________________________
Other than 18+ content, i share random memes, shitposts, cute animals and beautiful art! This blog will have no true continuity or order, I'll share whatever I'm interested in, and whatever i wanna share.
You can ask me anything, and do it anonymously if you prefer.
I am Pansexual/Omnisexual but I'm more interested in women, and feminine people. I can still be attracted to men, but in a less extreme way.
I'm into gaming, ttrpgs, and programmation. I'm also interested in artistic stuff, i like to appreciate. I'm also interested in science.
I'm politically left wing. Workers unite! LGBTQIA+ rights!
__________________________________________
Now, 18+ stuff~
if you don't wanna see that, don't press the keep reading
__________________________________________
Hey there! I'm a really horny tgirl!
Feel free to send to send anything you want in asks and dms!
__________________________________________
Anyways, now kinks~ I'm a submissive, and a bottom (but more of a sub than a bottom, i will service top if I'm in a sub role). I have an extensive kink list~ :
BDSM, bondage, submission, being dominated and given orders, receiving pain, latex and leather, petplay, degradation and praise, exhibitionism, secret public play, chastity, body writing, objectification, asphyxiation/breathplay, hypno, cnc, threats of violence (kifeplay/gunplay), watersports, blood, snuff, tentacles, tranformation, furry/scalies/monsters/etc, mild interest in vore. (working list)
stuff in green is more related to porn and hentai
Turn offs
Important to know, i'm not into
scat, detrans, ageplay
If there is something i haven't mentioned, I'm probably fine with it, but if you're unsure, ask. I won't kinkshame, even if you're into something I've mentioned not being into. __________________________________________
So yeah, now you have a tutorial on how to interact with me in a horny way.
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god-syndicate-if · 18 days
Note
Alright, how would ros react to a shy mc who is endlessly being hit on (and who needs help and looks over with the "save me" eyes)?
A classic! I love these. I'm assuming this is at Elysium or a party or something.
Riley:
Crushing: Walks up and stands next to you, then begins to cut the other person off, explaining in detail lore about some obscure fantasy series. If the person doesn't get the hint they'll just never let the other person talk and will interpose themselves between the two of you.
Relationship: Pushes them into a broom closet and locks the door so the two of you can enjoy the party.
Franco:
Crushing: Will join them actually. Sorry but now you're being double flirted with.
Relationship: Politely informs them that you're taken and then he'd proceed to get that person to hook up with one of his band members instead, so everyone's happy.
Verne:
Crushing: As inelegantly as possible they'll walk over and tell the other person to fuck off.
Relationship: This is fun because they don't like to show their feelings to the public, but they also like to make sure people knows what is "theirs", And they're just generally protective over the people they care for. So this position they're in now will make them act kind of stupid because they'll be out of their depth. It'll be a toss up between them just walking over and kissing you really hard in front of the other person. Or threatening the other person. Either way they'll be ready to fight.
Mitch:
Crushing: Turns their drink into the nastiest alcohol he's ever had so when they take a sip they're immediately disgusted. When they turn to get a new one he'll shoot you a "gtfo" glance. If you don't get the fuck out then that's on you.
Relationship: "They're taken. Move on."
Sigourney:
Crushing: Walks up carrying her drink and "accidentally" trips and falls on the other person. Apologizes profusely and helps them clean up. If she REALLY wants to be petty she'll try to spill something that will stain.
Relationship: Ignores the other person and says something to you that makes note of your relationship with her and how she knows you better than the other person. Something like "Lets go home, darling. I know you're not a fan of crowds. The new episode of that show came out today, we can watch that." Pretends she didn't know the other person was hitting on you, like you and them were having a normal conversation.
Dame:
Crushing: Just stands behind the person flirting with you and very loudly says something like "God, You're pathetic." Proceeds to start a yelling match probably, giving you time to sneak off.
Relationship: Ignores the person flirting with you at first. They'll walk up to you, slip a hand around your waist and get really close. Whisper that they'd like to go home. After a short quiet conversation between the two of you they'll finally look to whoever was bothering you, give them a glance up and down, and give a little smirk before walking off with you. They won't say anything as it'd drop them to the other person's level. They're able to EASILY insult that person to hell and back with a look alone.
Rebel:
Crushing: Will not save you. She's going to watch and see what you do. But she will make note of the person. She won't let them become a threat.
Relationship: (Wrestling announcer voice) "HERE COMES REBEL WITH THE STEEL CHAIR!!" Joking, but only kind of... She'd probably start some sort of mass panic in the party. A fire is the most likely. Then when the crowd is fleeing she'd grab the person bothering you, pulling them away from the panic, and make sure they never bother you again.
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courtingchaos · 2 years
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Rent the Space Inside My Mind
1 I 2 I 3 I 4 I 5 I 6
Pairing: Eddie Munson x Female!Reader
Summary: Man, remember that picture you found? I wonder how you two decide to deal with that little hiccup...
A/N: I've finally come to the realization that this little fic is a labor of love for me. It's my baby so it isn't ever really going to have a real updating schedule. All of that to say, thank you for sticking around and reading you guys! Not a spoiler but just so you know, the end kind of reads like An End, but I have a lot more planned for theses two. This is just like, and end to the pining.
Also, I know others are reading this, but I'm giving a whole shoutout to @fracturedarkness who has been the best cheerleader for me with this story from essentially day one. Literally a ray of sunshine 😘😘😘
(If y'all want a soundtrack at all, just listen to Hozier's Wasteland! Baby. Seriously it's basically all I listened to.)
Warnings: SMUT! There's smut! Halleluiah! 18+ NSFW Minors GTFO
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In sixth grade Eddie had caught mono. It was the first serious illness that Wayne had to deal with since taking guardianship four years earlier. Eddie had moaned around the trailer for two weeks, unable to stay awake for more than a few hours at a time. He’d been exhausted and couldn’t swallow right. The fever he’d get at night made him nauseous those first few days and that’s the only thing he can compare this sick twist in his gut to. 
Between the picture clutched in your fingers and the intense look on your face, Eddie thinks he might just turn inside out. 
“Ed?”
It sounds like an accusation in his ears. You’ve found him out, evidence catching the light where it waves around between the two of you. Forget trying to tell you his feelings, he’s got a date with  buckshot later. 
He takes it back actually, this feels the same as the day you accidentally met his dad. The sudden visit on a rare stint between prison stays. The lead weight of fear and sadness and pure fucking rage making him go cold and numb.
Eddie is so tired of shit going wrong in his life. 
“Eddie?” How do you sound so soft when he has clearly screwed up so bad?
Also, he went for one shower after making a stupid mess and you decided to what, go through his shit?
Don’t start 
There’s a black mood he gets in sometimes. It creeps up his insides, stains him dark. It makes him mean and he doesn’t want to be mean, not to you. Not to anyone really. 
He knows on a deeper level this is his fault, it was only a matter of time before you found the picture. Tucked in books and forgotten in his sheets he’s honestly surprised it’s taken this long.  
“Eddie!” The sharpness of his name jerks his head out of the haze he’s in. Sees your eyes clearly and you’re not mad, in fact he thinks that might be a smile hidden under all the confusion. 
“Where did you get this?” Even and calm. Could you lend him some of that? His throat clicks when he tries to swallow. 
“I think uh, I think I took it. On ha-Halloween. Last year.” He doesn’t recognize his own voice, the deep scratch of it. “We were drunk at Hagan’s. I don’t know wh-“
“You took this?” Another wiggle of the polaroid. Your grip on the box of weed is still white knuckled. Okay, maybe that wasn’t a smile. He can’t really tell anymore, the panic settling in firing off all his alarm bells. 
“You weren’t supposed to find it.” He’s so quiet, hasn’t been quiet like this in a long time. Wasn’t even this quiet sneaking into bedrooms. 
You take a step forward and he launches back. Head hits the door frame and if god is real he would let the paneling swallow him whole right now. 
“Why do you have this? Why all the-” you gesture behind you, “why all my shit? You told me you hadn’t seen my Theo figure anywhere and she’s in the drawer with all my shit!” Your voice gets tight, face scrunching up in complete confusion. “I thought I was loosing my stuff but you’re just stealing all of it! My zippo! Eddie what the fuck?!” No, right, there’s the anger. He’s pressed so firmly against the door jam it’s guaranteed to leave marks for a week. You take another step forward and he has nowhere to go, pinned under your scrutiny and words and the waving hand holding his shame. But where your voice was rising in anger, it drops suddenly, slides into something softer. “Why do you have this?”
Yeah Eddie, why do you have it?
It’s a total accumulation of, let’s be real, two years of unrepentant pining. Two years of being a dick and going after easy girls because you were off limits in his own doctrine. Too good a friend to ruin the relationship, and too good a person to ruin with himself. It’s nights spent at the bookstore waiting for you to get off, watching with a burning in his gut as the dipshit college guy you work with tries to edge his way into a date. Blunts and cigarettes shared like kisses between lips he isn’t allowed to taste otherwise. It’s the grappling like two idiots fighting, breathless giggles and rough shoves that end in headlock hugs and usually him tapping out first, unable to stand being in your embrace if it isn’t for keeps. 
“I…” the space in his room is somehow bigger than it’s ever been, leaving him adrift in the chaos of his things and your things and the too thin air that you’re somehow breathing in just fine. There’s a stutter in his chest where he’s not catching his breath, the familiar heat behind his eyes where the tears are trying to rush forward. “It’s just-fuck! It’s such a creep…move I know and I just didn’t want to l-let it go because it was a good night and-and a good picture and your hand…” he’d dropped his eyes to stare at your feet, unable to say his half-assed explanation to your face. “Your hand. On my leg.” Just a whisper. Swings his hand limply toward you. “I just, it was a nice thought.”  His throat is tight and he’s afraid if you keep looking at him he might cry. 
He’s watched you take enough steps forward so you’re practically toe to toe with him. In his peripheral he watches you toss the box behind you onto the bed, your other clutching the evidence lightly taps against his chest and rests there. 
He looks up through his lashes and his hair, keeping his sight obscured like it’ll protect him from whatever you’re about to say. 
“I can’t believe-“ you cut off with a laugh and a shake of your head, that small smile he thought he saw turning back up. “I feel so fucking stupid.”
Eddie’s stomach has disappeared along with the rest of his insides. There’s never been a real foundation of proof for him, just stolen glances he’s caught you in. That lingering look you’d give him, the way you’d hang onto him longer during a hug sometimes. Mostly just blind hope and his own low simmering ego to egg him on. 
“Do you want to know what I did this morning?” He nods, he really does want to know. There’s the smallest drip of warmth trickling down his back with your words. 
“I woke up and I thought about you. First thought of the day.” A deep breath and he can see the pink blooming up out of the collar of his shirt you’re wearing. “I thought about you and I felt so stupid after, for sitting in the dark and pretending that you’d ever-“ You stop yourself again and drop your eyes to stare at your hand on his chest. 
“You thought about me?” He asks and you nod slowly. He’s got an idea about what that might mean. “Do you maybe also have a secret polaroid?”
A break in the tension and you take a step back, laughing. A real one he knows, warm and happy. The photo hits him in the chest where your hand just was, where you’ve just flicked it at him. “How long Eddie?” 
“What?” He grabs for the photo but it flutters to the ground. 
“How long have you liked me?” Your wide eyes and breathless question challenge him. When he doesn’t respond fast enough for you, you reach out and push his bangs away from his face, smoothing them back. His wispy armor is gone and with it, surprisingly, some of his fear. Your eyes are clear and waiting, smile still pulling at your lips. 
“I don’t, I don’t have like, a date. Like, a-awhile.” Eddie stutters like he’s never spoken these words before. Nerves replacing fear when it starts to finally dawn on him: this isn’t going to end in flames.
The hand at his forehead slides down and rests on his cheek. He hasn’t taken a full breath in since you pushed his hair back, never mind now that your cradling his face, but the fear has been slowly melting off his shoulders while you’ve been staring at him and when your eyes trail down his face, it and the sudden nerves all just disappear. 
He feels your fingers flex along his jaw and he finally takes that breath. 
“I’m not reading this wrong am I?” Barely a whisper but he hears you. Shakes his head and opens his mouth to talk but you cut him off, just as quiet, “I don’t want us to make a mistake.” 
“You think this’d be mistake?” The hurt leaks through without his meaning to. 
“God no, Eddie I-“
There’s a bloom of confidence he hasn’t felt before, something that twist up through his ribs and around his spine. “Good.” 
Reaching out for you feels natural. He’s reached out to you a hundred times before but he’s never slid his hands into your hair. Tucked them up behind your ears and pulled you in close, felt you gasp when he brushes his lips against yours. Your hands pull at his shirt where they’re both fisted in the thin material, keeping him close. When you push into him he feels your mouth open, tongue grazing along his bottom lip; white static across his thoughts. 
It’s 10pm on a Thursday night and your kissing him in his room. Wearing his t-shirt and pushing him against the wall while your kissing him. He feels one of your hands flatten against his chest and his heart rockets off and your still kissing him. There’s your tongue again begging entrance and he yields, feels that barbell slide across his own tongue and he’s done for. It’s better than he could ever fantasize. He wants more of it but you just aren’t close enough. He grips at your hair to pull you in, to try and deepen the kiss but there’s no where else to go. You mumble something against his lips but he just swallows the sound and slides a hand down your back till he can get his fingers up under the hem of the shirt, palm laid flat against the small of your back. 
“Eddie.” You sigh his name and he makes it a personal goal right then to get you to do it again. Your hands wander down his chest and he starts his own wandering down your neck, lips finding any open skin he can kiss. “Hold on, Eddie-“
“I’m not holding on for shit.” He says in between kisses. “I’ve been thinking about doing this for months.” Your laugh vibrates under his mouth and it makes his eyes roll. “Do you want me to stop?” He pauses under your ear, panting against you. 
“No.” You sigh and shake your head, leaning into his hand still in your hair. “No I don’t.” 
He spends a few more minutes pulling little sounds out of you that he’s filing away for later. Nipping at your skin when you run your hands under his shirt and push it up. 
“Can I?” The question isn’t even finished before he pulls the shirt over his head and throws it behind you on the dresser. “Oh!” A giggle when he lays his hands back on you, hands rucking up your own shirt where he can run his palms over your midriff. There’s no finesse to his kisses anymore, just laying them wherever he can, anything to make you giggle again. He moves his hands higher, pushing your shirt up so he can finally see your tits again. It’s been a whole ass year since your wore your dress and he’s dreamt about this every day since. He kisses the tops of them and is mesmerized by the way they bounce back under his touch. 
“Hello old friends.”
“Old friends?!” When you laugh they move with you and he has to force himself to look back up at you. 
“Yeah, you saw the picture. We’re well acquainted.” He buries his face down in your cleavage and you hear him take a deep breath. “How do you always smell so good?” He’s layering kisses again and you’re trying to move around until you can pull your own shirt off. “Hey don’t rush this, I have this perfectly planned.” 
“Oh, so you left the drawer open on purpose?”
“Absolutely, it’s been my months long plan.” He takes a step forward to force you back one. Eyebrows scrunched together he scoffs, “I almost let you catch me for a while and then it happens by mistakeand I act like it’s the biggest fuck up ever and now I’ve got you shirtless. Listen, I plan campaigns babe. You know I can write ten steps ahead.” He’s walking you backwards till your legs hit his bed, fingers holding onto your belt loops to keep you close. 
“Eddie?” You hook your fingers into the waistband of his flannel pants, pulling down till they shift off his hips. 
“What?” He’s distracted by your fingers sliding around his hips. 
“You’re so full of shit.” He laughs when steps out of his pants and sees you look down, an immediate tilt to your head. Your fingers still against his skin, skimming the elastic of his boxers but he knows you’re staring at the growing bulge. The clever remark he had ready dies in the back of his throat when he hears the quiet ‘hmm’, watches your tongue poke out to swipe across your lips.
“If you keep staring I’m gonna get self conscious.” One hand covers his mouth to muffle the end of his sentence while the other lightly rubs up against his dick through the thin cotton. Somehow he stays upright, mouth falling open under your hand to pant against your palm. 
“You got any other surprises for me Munson?”
Are you talking to him? He can’t get a braincell to function with the heat of your hand pressed against him, barely moving at all. The button on your jeans is about all he can fathom, getting them opened and remembering how a zipper works is next. Your breath bouncing off of his chest makes him shiver and kind of brings some of his brain back up and running. 
“I uh, I got a few tricks up my sleeve.” He tips you back till you sit and he follows close, making you lay down. You laugh when your back hits the bed and you keep laughing, body shaking as he works your jeans down your legs. 
“What’s so funny, giggles?”
“I’m just…this is the first time I’ve had sex in a bed.”
Eddie stops moving and looks up at you from your feet. “I’m sorry, what?” He hopes he’s just hearing wrong, on account of his brain short circuiting a moment ago.  
“Yeah, it’s just always been in the back of cars.” You say it so flippantly, like it’s just a thing that happened to you. “I mean, It’s whatever. I just realized no one’s ever pushed me back on a bed before.” Your grin is hazy when you look down your body at him but he’s stone sober now. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to any of those assholes and he knows it. You’re the best thing to happen to him, and somehow you’ve gone this long with shitty car hookups. 
“No.” He shakes his head and pulls your jeans off fully. Slides your socks off and tosses them in the pile of your clothes. “You’re lying, please tell me your lying.” 
“I’m not! There’s so much more room!” You wave your arms next to you like you’re making a snow angle in his sheets. You sit up quick, bracing yourself on one hand to reach behind yourself to undo your bra when he stops you. 
“You don’t have to do that, I can help.” He’s crowded up against your legs where you’ve dropped them both sideways. 
“I know that, I was just making it easier.” His face must drop because you huff at him. “Look, I’m not stupid Eddie. I just, haven’t had the best track record I guess. I just assumed-“
“That I was gonna be like the other guys.”
You shrug. “Yeah, Hawkin’s finest. You know.” 
That’s a little bit of a blow, he won’t lie, but watching you slam up your walls when they’ve been nonexistent all night makes him switch tactics. 
“You deserve better than that.” He swings his legs to the side so he can lean over you, one arm braced against your hip, the other tilting your chin to look at him. He doesn’t think he’s ever seen you pout before, your bottom lip sticking out pink and wet and he wants to bite it. “I’m serious.” He leans in close, lips brushing yours. “Can I be nice to you?” He whispers against you and your face flushes immediately, eyes darting down to stare at the bed. He can’t stop the grin spreading across his face, delighted with how flustered you get. 
“I-you’re always nice.” You mumble, chin fighting to get away from his hand holding you still. 
“I can be nicer.” He closes the small gap and kisses you again, still holding your chin. He can feel your breathing speed up when it ghosts over his cheek where you’re nose is pressed. When he’s certain you won’t pull away he moves his hand to your back, unhooking the clasps one by one. Eddie pulls back to look at you properly, fingers lightly pulling the straps down your arms. “Can I?”
“You don’t have to ask.” You say, still nodding your head at him anyways. 
“It’s good manners.” He says simply, wiggling your bra off of you, tossing it to join the growing pile. You’ve shifted back to your elbows, further away from him but giving him a better view. None of his fantasies are measuring up to real life. Just watching the way your tits lay when you shift has him practically drooling. He runs a fingertip from between them and down to your navel, marveling at the softness of your skin. Runs that same fingertip over to a hip and you jump just a little. “Ticklish?”
“Maybe.” Your voice is wobbly, chest rising and falling faster. He lays his palm flat against your stomach and runs it up your side, thumb brushing the underside of your breast and you sigh, letting your head fall back between your shoulders. 
“You are so fucking pretty.” Eddie means it. Even before all the crushing and jealously he could see it. With your head back he can watch the blush creep down your chest and he marvels at that too. 
“Eddie you can’t just say shit like that.” You sound strained from the angle your at. He runs his thumb under the swell of your breast again just to watch you shudder. 
“What, that your pretty?” He leans down to place a kiss on your chest, can feel your heartbeat tick up faster. He’s only got so much restraint before he grabs you up into his lap but he’s trying hard to be a gentleman about it. You deserve that much for your first time. Well, not overall but with him? Eddie’s determined to make you forget about every other guy who’s even looked at you. 
“Look at me.” He’s dropping kisses along your collarbone trying to get you to lift your head up. His hands have been itching to grab your tits but he wants you to stop being shy for a minute. “Please.” He’s trying to kiss up your neck when you finally lift your head. “Can you scoot up for me?” He asks and you oblige. As soon as your head hits his pillow he’s leaned back, pulling your knees back up so he wedge himself between them. He grabs your hand and pulls it up to kiss your open palm and you close your fingers around his cheeks, making him laugh. 
“Will you stop being cute and just touch me?” 
“How?” He kisses down your wrist, watching you get more flustered. 
“I don’t know, whatever you normally do?”
“No, that was with them, they don’t matter anymore.” He makes it to the crook of your elbow before he lets go and crawls over the top of you, getting in your face to stare you down. “What’d you think about this morning, hm?” He’s keeping track of all the little whimpers your making, the way you bite your lip when he makes you nervous. You won’t meet his eye so he follows your line of sight and you huff at him. 
“Stuff, Eddie. Oh my god.” You cover your face with your hands and he thinks he can feel the heat radiating off of you. It’s driving him crazy in the best way, he doesn’t think he’s ever had this effect on anyone before. 
“Aw c’mon. Tell me.” He kisses each finger before moving down to your knuckles and honestly, he just can’t help himself anymore when he brings a hand up to knead at your tits, a quick pinch of a hardened nipple and you gasp into your hands. “Was it this?” He pinches again and you wiggle under him, hips jumping up against him and he drops his head. You’re hot everywhere, and the core of you pressed up against him through his boxers is going to do him in if he’s not careful. “If you don’t tell me I’m gonna have to guess and this could be a long night.” He rolls his hips into you to try to get his point across and to try to get some relief. 
“Is that such a bad thing?” You ask, pulling your hands down to just cover your mouth. Your eyes are wide and glassy, pupils big and dark. 
“No, but I want to know what I do in these dreams of yours.” He moves back to your neck to make a path to your chest where he laps at your nipple. “Something like this?” He asks before wrapping his lips around and sucking, tongue flicking over sensitive skin. You arch your chest up and there’s a laugh caught in your moan. He moves over to your other side, nipping at you before mouthing at your other nipple, hand teasing at your hip. He snaps your underwear against you and you let out a quiet ‘ow’ and try to swat at his hand. “Or was I somewhere else?” His fingertips graze under the band and inch down. Your knees pull up tight around him and he’s so close to saying fuck it to his own game. 
“You were-fuck Eddie, you were going down on me.” You get so quiet, the one hand still on your mouth muffling your voice. 
“Oh?” He lets your nipple go with a wet sound, big grin already set in place. 
“If your gonna make fun of me…”
“Absolutely not.” 
You watch him over your hand place a scattering of kisses down till he hits your underwear, giving you one last questioning look before he hooks his fingers in and pulls them down. You’re also starting to feel a little self conscious when you realize he hasn’t taken his eyes off you. 
Payback
“Ed.” He just runs his hands up your legs, big palms warm against your thighs. He pulls your knees out a little further before leaning down and re-situating himself between your thighs, leaving open mouthed kisses along the inside. You’re torn between wanting to watch him and wanting to cover your face in embarrassment when he makes the decision for you, pulling at your elbow to drag your hand down to his head. He’s got that lazy smirk on his face and you can feel his breath skipping across too sensitive skin. 
“Give you something to hold on to.” You want to laugh but he’s too quick, fingers moving in to hold you open for him. Your head drops into the pillow when he licks a broad tongue from your center right up to your clit, your back arching up and Eddie’s laugh vibrates through you. 
“Oh fuck.”
“I haven’t even started yet.” You can hear the proud smirk in his voice and if you’d like to say something smart back you won’t, too focused on his mouth working you over. His tongue is soft, even when he points it, uses it to prod at your opening and you forget any remarks you might have had for him. 
“Eddie.” You pull at his hair when he wraps his lips around your clit and he groans. You’re stuck concentrating on his mouth until he slides one finger in and you choke on a gasp. He pulls his mouth away and lays his head against your leg, watching you from under his wet hair. 
“Is this what you thought about?” He can see you nod into the pillow, hand twisted next to your head in the fabric while he pumps his hand slowly. 
“It’s what I thought about.” He hooks his finger up, trying to find that soft spot to make you melt. “I think about it all the time.” The grip on your thigh is tight, keeping it close against his cheek. “Ever since you told me about those shitty dates.” 
“Seriously?” You lift your head, eyes half lidded and face scrunched up. 
“I should have nutted up and said something. They didn’t deserve you.” He pulls his finger out and you watch him suck it into his mouth, watch his eyes roll in his head. You groan and he adds his middle finger before he pulls his hand out, spit slick fingers running up over your clit, teasing you before he slides both back in. He leans in to run his tongue through your folds, watching you from under his lashes while you wriggle around and clutch at the pillow. The hand in his hair grips tighter and your legs squeeze up around his ears and he’s surrounded by you, the low chanting of his name keeping him planted in place. He finally finds that spot, feels you shudder under him before you moan, tilting your hips up to chase his touch. 
“Eddie Eddie Eddie fuck!” You keep rolling your hips against his face and he can’t help himself. He’s been pathetically rutting into the mattress listening to you whine and he can’t take it anymore. He taps under your thigh to get your attention, really gets it when he fully pulls away and you look down at him all concerned. “Why are you stopping?” 
“Good reason.” He stands up and pulls off his boxers, rooting around his nightstand for the condoms he knows are in there. He’s oblivious to you on the bed, sitting all the way up now and staring. Of course they’re not where he left them, instead tucked behind his lamp but he grabs one and climbs back on the bed before he realizes what he’s done. “Oh.” Eddie feels his face heat up when he looks down at himself. “I probably should have done that better.” He’s expecting you to laugh or sigh or say something witty but you just snatch the foil out of his hand and tear it open. You only pause for second before wrapping your hand around him and he’s positive this isn’t going to last as long as he’d hopped. When you roll the condom down he hisses and drops, head falling into your shoulder. 
“You okay champ?” 
He just nods and whines when you give him a few easy strokes, watching your hand move up and down his cock. You’re so much more gentle with him than he is with himself. Eyes half open and mouth hanging he’s sure he looks fucking stupid but he doesn’t care, doesn’t want you to stop touching him. When you scoot closer and pull his face up it takes him a moment to realize you’re kissing him, for him to react and do something. 
“C’mere.” He shakes out of his haze enough to move back between your knees, pulling your hips so your ass is flush against his thighs. He pulls your leg up to hook over his hip, placing a quick kiss on your knee before lining himself up.  He rubs the tip of cock against you, catching on your clit twice and making you whimper. 
“Please Ed.” He doesn’t need to be begged twice, grabs the base of his dick and sinks in slow. Sees your breath catch and your eyes roll, “Oh fuck it.” He bottoms out, can feel you clenching around him tight and hot and gasping and laughing and he looses all composure. Fingers dug into your leg wrapped around him he snaps his hips back and into you, punching out a sharp peal of laughter. He does it again, loves the way he can hear the choked off gasp in your throat. When he picks up his pace you grab at the sheets, twisting them up off his bed. 
“Fucking th-thank you-u!” It’s stuttered out between thrust, your face flushed and twisted up in a smile. 
“You know how many times I thought about this?” He has to talk, if he doesn’t talk he’s going to blow his load and he refuses to let your first time together end before a full minute passes. “Every time I looked at that picture I thought about it. I should have fucked you in that bathroom.” Your nails scratch at his thigh where they try to find purchase. “All the rides out to the lake oh fuck- I should have done this sooner, yeah?” He licks his thumb before bringing it down on your clit, running tight circles around it. Your back arches off the bed and he feels you clench around him. “Is that it? Right there-ohmygod.” It almost sounds like you’re crying his name just before you come, nails digging into his thigh when it crashes into you. He watches you tense up and then collapse against the bed, pliant under him where he starts to loose his rhythm. The heat that reached up fast burns up his spine while he watches you revel in your aftershocks, already trying to grab him down to you. The hazy look in your eyes and that grin you’re flashing him send him over the edge, burying himself with a deep groan, your name scattered between curses. He’s whited out until he can catch his breath, gripping your thigh until he can see straight. In the distant ringing in his ears he can hear your giggle under him, soft like the hands trying to pull him closer. 
“Hey.” Your eyes find his in his own haze, slowly coming back down to earth. “Come here.” Gentle tugs to get him to lay down but he shakes his head, asks for minute. He pulls out to get rid of the condom and disappears into the bathroom for minute, leaving you to roll around his bed. When he comes back he turns off his light. Sees that you’ve pulled the blankets up under your chin, one finger poking out to beckon him back in. “I’m cold.” 
Eddie would like to pinch himself just to make sure this is real. In all of his imaginings he never let himself have this part. The sex was easy to think about but this hurt too much to ever linger on. He finds his pants first before crawling back into bed, snaking a hand around your middle and pulling you into him. He wedges his nose up under your jaw and hums, leaving a few soft kisses in his wake. 
“Are you always this cuddly?” 
“I don’t normally get to cuddle.” You’re both quiet in the dark, hushed tones under the blankets. 
“Huh.” Your fingers tangle up in his hair, nails lightly scratching over his scalp. It sends a deep shiver down his spine and he has a split second where he feels like crying. “Their loss.” He feels the kiss you leave on his forehead and just buries his head further into your neck. You smell like you always do, sweet and deep and now a little like him. He drifts off without meaning to. 
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It’s not daylight yet, but his room is lighter. There’s no alarm clock going off next to his head so he looks around, trying to find whatever it is that pulled him out of his warm cocoon. 
Bleary vision in the dark, he can barely make out your form jumping quietly into your jeans. He’s peering at you from under the covers, watching you get dressed. You stop mid jump to pick something up, staring at it before padding over to his dresser and tucking it into his mirror. He’s basically awake when you turn to open his door and he quietly asks you where you’re going. 
“Jesus fucking Christ you’re gonna give me a heart attack.” You clutch you chest and try to search through the dark for his eyes, finally see him when he pulls the sheets back a bit. 
“Seriously, where are you goin’?”
“It’s almost 5. I figured Wayne was gonna be home soon so I cleaned up the living room and like, I didn’t know if I should hang around?”
“You sleep over here all the time.” He slides a hand out from under the covers to make a grabby hand at you. “He won’t care.”
“Well I mean, I’m not usually naked in your bed dude.”
“Then leave your shirt on.” Eddie doesn’t understand what you’re not understanding. “I mean it, Wayne isn’t gonna care. If anything he’ll be happy I stopped bitching about you.”
“You bitch about me?”
“No, I bitched about not having you. There’s a difference. Now come here, I’m cold.” He lifts the blankets up quick, making a sweeping motion for you to get back in. “Plus, he won’t say anything unless you do. He likes you too much to embarrass you.” You’re out of your jeans again and crawling over him, trying to avoid kneeing him. 
“Aww, he likes me?”
“Well I like you too.” You’re barely settled before he’s wrapped around you, leg hitched over your thighs and pinning you down. “What’s that get me?” He’s nosing along your jaw again. 
“Depends what you’re looking for.” 
“Mm. Concert tickets to see Ozzy in Indy.”
“Oh that’s a big ask.”
“I see. How about a kiss?” He pulls back to smile lazily up at you. 
“I can do that.”
❣Tag List❣
@edsforehead @fracturedarkness @munsonsguitarpick @bebe07011 @ali-r3n @cantreadbutcute @eddiethesexy @emma77645
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scoonsalicious · 4 months
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7.2 Bucky*
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader
Summary: Lily McIntyre, trainer for new SHIELD recruits at the Avengers Tower, has been in love with her best friend, Bucky Barnes, from the moment she met him. She's been content with her role of the #1 girl in Bucky's life, even if it means she has to sabotage a romantic relationship or two. It'll be worth it when he realizes that they're meant for each other, right? There's just one small problem: Lily McIntire never expected Bucky Barnes to fall for You.
Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language, Explicit Sexual Content Minors: GTFO; I don’t serve your kind here (oral (m receiving)).
Word Count: 1.3k
Previously On...: Bucky surprised you with a night-time picnic. You exchanged dog tags, and now things have taken a sexy turn.
A/N: Fair warning, this and the next two sections are smut! Hurray!
If you ever feel so inclined to support my work, hop on over to buy me a coffee; it's much appreciated! <3
NOTE! The tag list is a fickle bitch, so I'm not really going to be dealing with it anymore. If you want to be notified when new story parts drop, please follow @scoonsaliciousupdates
Thank you to all those who have been reading; if you like what you've read, likes, comments, and reblogs give me life, and I truly appreciate them, and you!
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Bucky Barnes was convinced in that moment he’d died and gone to heaven. How else could he explain the sight before him? Major, on her knees, completely naked in the middle of the woods, save for his dog tags around her neck, body glowing under the candlelight of the lanterns as she palmed his aching erection through his jeans, telling him how much she wanted it down her throat. 
But Bucky knew that a man who carried as many sins on his back as he did had no hope of finding paradise in the afterlife, so this could only be the real thing. He watched with mouth hanging open as Major crawled up his body, undoing his belt and unbuttoning his pants. “Help a girl out and lift your hips, Sergeant?” she asked him with a smirk.
Bucky let out a low groan as he obliged, lifting his hips from the blanket so Major could pull his pants off his legs. Once she’d removed them, she tossed them aside atop her own pile of discarded clothes. 
“Mmm,” she hummed, “you sure look pretty, Sarge. Let’s get that shirt off.” Bucky made a move to reach for the hem of his shirt, but Major tutted him. “Let me take care of you tonight,” she said. “You always do such a good job of making me feel good; I want to return the favor.” Her hands reached to his waist, dragging his shirt up and over his torso, then his head, and Bucky thought he was going to cum on the spot. He’d never been with a woman so… enthusiastic? Insatiable? Commanding? All of the above, he thought. 
Once she had his shirt off, she leaned back on her haunches and studied him, licking her lips as she took him in. “I just want you to lay back and let me do all the work, okay?” she asked him. 
Bucky found he couldn’t speak through the lump in his throat but did as Major asked, leaning back on his elbows so he could watch her. She locked eyes with him, and he expected her to take his briefs off of him the way she had his pants, but instead, she leaned down and began to nuzzle his cock with her cheek through the fabric.
He sucked in a breath as she drew her nose along his clothed length. As he grew harder, she began sucking open-mouthed kisses against him. While Bucky couldn’t wait to feel her warm mouth against his sensitive skin, the friction the fabric was providing as she worked on him was divine.
“Fuck, sugar,” he grunted as her palm rolled over him. The gray fabric of his boxer briefs was already dark with precum, but Major added to the growing wet patch with her saliva. “If I don’t get these off soon, it’s gonna be the second pair I’ve ruined because of you in two days.”
Major laughed, her mouth so close to Bucky’s groin, he could feel the vibration of it in dick. “Wouldn’t want that,” she said teasingly. “No washer and dryer out here in the woods. Though, I suppose you could rinse them out in the stream and I could fuck you until they’re dry.”
“You kiss your mother with that mouth?” Bucky asked, his laugh turning into a gasp as Major rolled his boxer briefs down his hips, setting his erection free.
“Nope, just this fat cock,” Major said, winking at him. Once she’d slid his underwear down to his knees, she leaned forward and gave his cockhead a featherlight kiss. Bucky grunted and arched his back. Who knew the softest of touches could feel so fucking good?
Major licked a long, slow stripe along the underside of Bucky’s cock from the base to the tip, and Bucky nearly came right then. He tried to think of any and everything he could come up with to stave off his orgasm as Major took him fully into her mouth. 
He settled on the 1941 Brooklyn Dodgers. 
Major’s tongue around his tip, dancing over its weeping slit and Bucky bent his knees to brace himself against the ground… 
Winning the Pennant for the first time in 21 years over the Cardinals. 
Her cheeks hollowing as her mouth tightened around him, enveloping him in her warm heat… 
Losing the World Series to the goddamn Yankees, 3 to 1 in the fifth and final game. 
Her tongue sliding along the underside of his cock as her head began to bob back and forth, taking him deeper and deeper with each thrust. 
Higbe and Wyatt pitching their best seasons. 
The feeling of her nose brushing up against the curly hairs of his pubic bone… 
Eight hundred runs, the highest in the league and – Jesus fucking Christ, was she actually swallowing around him?!
It was too much. Despite his best efforts, everything she was doing to him felt too wonderful, too euphoric for him to continue to think straight, let alone try and hold back. “Fuck, sugar, pull off; ‘m gonna cum,” he grunted, but Major didn’t retreat. If anything, her eyes took on a sardonic look and she gripped his thighs tighter and began moving her head faster than she had before. God, Bucky thought as he watched her from between his legs, she looked a vision, the way she was devouring him. With her eyes locked on his, and the flickering shadows dancing in the candlelight, she looked like something out of ancient myth, a goddess of fire and lust, of darkness and passion. And he was a willing sacrifice to her alter.
The candlelight reflecting off the silver tag around her neck that bore his name. Of all the mere mortals that roamed the planet, Major had selected Bucky Barnes to bestow upon him the honor of seeing her, like this, in all of her divine glory. 
With a grunt that bordered on a growl, Bucky came at that thought– the thought that someone like her felt that he, of all people, was worthy. He could feel seemingly never-ending ropes of his cum spurt from his cock, and he was fully expecting Major to pull away– none of the other girls he had ever been with could seem to withstand the amount of cum the serum led him to produce, but Major? Major continued to suck him like he was a straw, as though she were trying to draw every ounce of cum out of Bucky’s balls and take it down her throat. And by the gleam in her eye, she seemed to actually be enjoying it. 
After what felt like the longest orgasm of Bucky’s very long life, he finally stopped, his cock beyond sensitive. Bucky’s elbows gave out and he fell onto his back, gasping for breath. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d cum that hard. Gently, Major slid herself off of him. She wiped at her mouth gently with a hand, then moved to grab one of the extra blankets Bucky had brought for their picnic. She carefully draped it over him, then crawled up alongside his body to mold herself along his length.
“Are you okay?” she asked, tracing a gentle finger along the line of his jaw.
Bucky sucked in a gulp of air before turning to face her. “You…” he began, not even sure where he was going with his thought, he was so lost in the post-orgasmic fog of his brain, “you are fucking magic.”
Major pressed her forehead against Bucky’s shoulder and snickered. “If you say so,” she told him. 
“I do say so,” Bucky said, still trying to catch his breath. “I just need a minute.”
“Take your time,” Major said. “I’m not going anywhere.”
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turbotasthick · 5 days
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If you could say something to all TSAMS characters, what would you say?
BLOODMOON (old): bro if only you didnt fuck up and tease the living hell outta sun you couldve had a sick family whod help you and love you. they did you so fucking dirty like you actually had potential to be good with your LOVE FOR THE CALM when the bloodmoon was up, when you say nobody gets you my god you couldve been such a cool fucking brother for them.
BLOODMOON (new): You were fucked from birth when ruin made you. bro wasnt even give the coding to be able to change, to eat foods, and to just be a fucking dog for everyone despite you not admitting to it. you couldve sucked up your urges and you wouldnt have to be alone but no your coding fucked you up from the start and ended up alone in the end i pity you, bitch. rest in hell with your brother also bloodmoon i think youre fucking funny you couldve been such a cool character to be their brother bro if only your thick headed skull of yours could comprehend shit and not succumb to your blood and murder addiction
Sun: You should stop shaking and shivering in fear and do somefuck about your brother it pains me to see him get replaced like that- and fuck old moons back yet you dont have the backbone to stand up against him when he yells hits or berates you fucking do better sun smh
moon: do better youre slowly going back to your old ways bro like stop forcing sun to do shit he dosent want or yell at his face or be a bitch bro
nexus: respectfully go to therapy and do fucking better bro i cant believe youd do that to your family AND solar??? i know you broke down and are probably in some psychotic break holy shit (i pity you honestly) but fuck man its so rough seeing you struggle and isolate yourself like this- fuck even going as far as to lobotomizing yourself...i hate how hirt you are rn and i hate how youre also hurting people fucking shit
solar: God im glad youre back and shit but i feel pity for you- of course theyd put you right into work- of course youd drown yourself into your work..youre mourning your best friend i understand but please dont give up on him so fucking easily like how his family did- solar cmon man nexus loves you bro..dont kill him right away...
lunar: Ngl i used to really like you but now you just break my heart- idk when you said "nexus and i werent ever close" that fucked me up cause nexus did and tried everything to get close to you- he wanted to keep you safe helpef you in any troubles you might have and you just spit in the guy in the end- and not yo mention how you seem to push solar away as well-- dont tell me you arent close to him too after what solar does for you? you feel really cold lunar
eclipse: Eclipse, bestie please gtfo of puppets grasp you deserve to leave and live your life without a fucking burden on your hands bro- it must be annoying. Also i hope you make more friends.
earth: Wtf happened to your caring nature?
jack: my precious pomerianian puppy!!!! yourr so cool and awesome with your weapons and agility do you wanna play fight with me kiddo? i bet you cant beat me in a tussle!
dazzle: Hiiiii wanna go out to the markets and buy some banaynays and froot? we can bring jack with you honey :3
kill code: be a better father lol like goddamn and why didnt you fight for ur life when bm killed you? didnt you WANT to live a nice life? ffs kc
flare: Slay babe you did nothing wrong imo rest in heaven
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When I Get Home (Hawks x Black!Fem!Reader 18+ Angsty One Shot)
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"Can really love a monster like me?"
Pairing: Keigo Takami x Black!Fem!Reader 
Synopsis: In which Keigo realizes how truly lucky he is to have you by his side despite his refusal to open up to you and show you how deep his scars run, so he decides when he finally gets home from his stupid fucking mission, he’ll show you his scars, his heart, and everything more. 
Story Warnings: MAJOR MANGA/ANIME SPOILERS (BEWARE!), Smutty Smut, 18+ (MINORS GTFO), Angsty Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Crying, Arguing, Mentions & Use of Marijuana, High Sex, Shower Sex, Possessiveness, Scar Appreciation, Edge Play, Sensitivity, Marking, Biting, Foreplay, Cunnilingus, Deepthroating, Doggystyle, Mating Press, Begging, Vocal, Subby, Feral Hawks, Unprotected Sex, Creampie, Facial, Wing-Stroking, Breeding Kink, Aftercare 
Disclaimer: I own none of the characters mentioned in this fic. However, as this is my writing, I do not give permission for my work to be reposted on any other sites that are not from my own accounts. Thank you!
Writer’s Note: Got another one shot for y'all and it's my first Hawks fic!! I love me some of that birb man. I was listening to Faith Evan's "Soon As I Get Home" & got inspired lol. Enjoy! AND FUCK ENDEAVOR. -Jazz
*********
Keigo hates the rain. 
It reminds him too much of his childhood days when he would aimlessly wander through the wet streets of his childhood home of Kyushu, looking for shelter and a place to lay his head and tired wings, too wet and weak to fly. 
A rainy night like this reminds him too much of those nights where he would escape his home to find solace in the streets, only to get nothing but some firsthand experiences of the hostility and black-heartedness of humanity: crime; abuse; violence. He’d find himself in the slums, surrounded by the degenerates of Kyushu, soaked to the bone in rain, shivering his poor little feathers off. 
But now, sitting and watching the sheets of rain fall along the city, his legs dangling off of one of the highest buildings in downtown Musutafu, he finds the rain a little comforting. Especially given his circumstances. 
He is in his hero gear, gloves, goggles and boots included. He isn’t sure why he decided to change into it before he left the penthouse, but something told him just to do it. After all, a hero’s job is never done. Maybe he just might get lucky and find himself stopping a robbery or a carjacking to distract himself. He’d need a lot of it to make himself feel less like shit for tonight. 
Whenever he closes his eyes, all he sees is you and the hurt in your pretty, brown eyes. Those eyes he wants to stare into forever. How could he hurt you so badly? How could a night that went as well as it could go at a charity ball end in such turmoil for the both of you? 
“Fuck,” he hisses, his head dropping into his hands as the memories of the past few hours begin to rewind in his head: 
“I just wanna know who she is to you,” you declared as you sat on the couch in your shared living room hours later. You were still in your gown from tonight–bright crimson to match Keigo’s wings, your hair curled to perfection and your heels making your legs look fantastic. He stared at you from the kitchen then while you unstrapped your Steve Madden heels, his hands itching to do it for you. 
“Why?” he asked, doing his best to not scoff at the question. “There’s nothin’ to tell, Y/N; I told you that.” As he headed into the kitchen, he loosened his tie with one hand and popped a button to his Armani button-down, glad to be out of his suit jacket and shoes. Though he looked good, he felt like a little kid being forced to dress for church. 
He went into the back where the walk-in pantry and wine cellar is to get himself a much-needed, chilled bottle of Merlot wine. When he returned to the kitchen, he glanced at you from across the marbled kitchen island. You were already staring at him from the living room, your red dress standing out against black couch.“But she isn’t a friend to you?” You asked, sounding agitated at his answer.“Or a coworker? You barely introduced me to her tonight, Keigo.” 
Now Keigo was agitated even though he shouldn’t have been. But damn, you always did this. You always tried to dig into him at the worst possible moments. Especially during a moment where all he’s trying to do is just relax after a night of acting.“Why the fuck does it matter?” He scoffed flippantly. 
Your eyes flared angrily at him.“First of all, don’t talk to me like that,” you sternly said, jabbing one acrylic nail at him.“You don’t have to be like that, okay? We’re just having a conversation here.” 
Keigo turned his back to you to get the corkscrew out the drawer next to the $800 stove with its electric stove top and Stirling steel oven.“No,” he argued, bumping his hip against the drawer to shut it.“What you’re doing right now is putting me on the spot when you know tonight took a lot out of me. You know I’m not built for shit like that wack ass fuckin’ ball, Y/N.” 
You gaped at him, dumbfounded.“I told you we didn’t have to go tonight, Keigo!” you protested, anger evident in your tone.“You wouldn’t listen to me!” 
You crossed those gorgeous legs over each other, the light glowing against your skin still shining with coconut oil. Keigo was initially excited to get you home tonight just to feast on those legs and perhaps fuck you in that dress before stripping it off of you. It was the only thing he had looked forward to for tonight despite being forced by the Hero Commission to attend that stupid charity ball to prove that Japan’s heroes were “conscious of civilians’ needs all over the nation”. 
It isn't that he hated charity. He wasn’t an asshole. He made sure to give his portion to hospitals, animal shelters, and homeless shelters all over Japan. He just hated being forced to put up with the annoying reporters and cameras in his face all night while he pretended to enjoy socializing with people that weren't his cup of tea and his nosey coworkers. 
He especially wasn’t looking forward to it when you had asked to go with him. He hadn’t ever taken you to a ball or any kind of event that was associated with his hero work in the time you’ve been dating him, but you understood the strict ways of the Hero’s Commission and how it was important for Keigo to keep up his “bachelor” image for as long as he could to gain more popularity. 
At least, that’s what you told him when he explained things to you. 
He had figured tonight wouldn’t be a big deal since security kept the paparazzi and reporters outside the venue, so he let you come along and met you inside the building after he was done dealing with the zoo animals with their note pads and microphones on the red carpet. 
However, he quickly realized how bad of a decision that was when his coworkers began swarming, asking him who “the beauty” was sitting with him; how you were; how long you two have been together; where he’s been hiding you at. 
And then, of course, Wanna had to show up. Fucking Kanna! Keigo would have rather had forgotten she existed, but there she was, in the flesh in her skin-tight dress with her publicist. She was a simple fling; a past summer he spent with a model before he met you. That was a different time for him. A time where he didn't give a fuck where he stuck his dick because he was desperate to rid himself of the nightmares for a night in someone’s bed. 
But seeing his past and his hopeful future interact the way you and Kanna did after Kanna made a show of throwing herself at Keigo and making conversation made him want to off himself right there. Especially when he saw your face when he didn’t introduce you to Kanna–disappointment; confusion; hurt. So much hurt. 
But you didn’t understand. And though you never will, Keigo knows that it is for the best.
“Correction: you didn’t have to go,” he cooly stated.“But I do! Are you forgetting I’m pro no. 2? Publicity matters. If I wasn’t there, the whole fuckin’ nation’s eyes would’ve been on me wondering where I was and coughing up shit for the next magazine cover.” 
He huffed to himself as he turned away from you once more to jab the screw into the cork to try and open the wine. When that didn’t work, he flung the cork screw away, nearly breaking it, and took the cork into his mouth. He pulled on the damn thing until it finally popped out of the nozzle. He then spat it out and reached above to grab himself a wine glass from the suspended wine glass rack before pouring himself a much-needed glass and taking a long gulp. 
As soon as the wine was in his system, he felt an inch better, but that anger at himself still chugged in his veins. Anger for not being real with you. For never telling you the truth. For never being the man you deserved. 
A tense silence coated the air between you in his penthouse. Ever since you started visiting since the first night you spent the evening with him in his bed, you’ve been here more than at your own apartment. Keigo doesn’t mind one bit. He feels so at home with you here, but even when you aren’t together, he feels at home with you….so why can’t he make you feel the same way? 
“Keigo, I didn’t mean to upset you,” you finally sigh.“I just felt like tonight you didn’t really want me there. I felt like you were embarrassed with me.” 
His eyes widen at the confession and fear grips him. ‘Oh, no,’ he lamented internally. ’Oh, no, no, no.’ That was the last thing he wanted to make you feel like ever. When he looked over at you, you had a despondent, oh-so sad look on your pretty, beat face. All because of his stupidity. “Why would you think that?” he all but whispers. 
“You barely looked at me,” you reply, your voice soft and defeated. “Barely touched me. Half of your coworkers didn’t even know you had a girlfriend, Kei.” 
Keigo pinched the bridge of his nose. He thought you’d been through this already.“You know why I can’t just go public with my relationships, Y/N. Don’t even start with this shit.” 
You stared at him for a moment, sizing him up, and for a moment, he thought you might start wilding on him. Your silence scared him even more though.“C’mon now,” he tiredly sighed. “It’s been a long night. Can’t we just forget tonight and roll somethin’ up?” He gave you a smile, hoping you’d say yes to some wine, some smoke, and some much-needed TLC after tonight’s events. 
But instead, you gave him a tight-lipped stare with a wall behind your eyes that made him realize that he’d be getting none of that tonight with you. He watched in utter defeat as you rose from the couch and strutted away upstairs to your bedroom, never turning to look back at him. 
When he heard the door slam behind you, he knew he fucked up. Epically. He put his head in his hands, feeling like screaming until his throat was raw, but he knew that would do nothing to fix this. This was a reoccurring problem between you two; one that always seemed to end in arguments and nights where he spent spent either on the couch or out among the skies. 
The truth was he wanted to desperately open up to you. He wanted to tell you why he hated every social event the Hero Commission forced him to attend. 
Why he hated the entire organization he worked for so passionately, but still allowed himself to be manipulated and exploited to save others. 
Why he had trouble sleeping and drinking habits. 
Why he never tells you about the past hookups and flings. 
Why he would sometimes smoke an entire bag of weed to rid himself of those horrible, itching thoughts of the past. 
Why he never visited his mother. 
Why he never visited Dabi in prison and who he was to you outside of a mortal enemy. 
Why he feels like he is undeserving of any success or good thing in his life. 
Why he hates himself. 
Why he doesn’t truly love himself at all. 
But he can’t lose you, and he knows if he were to ever reveal who he is behind the dazzling smile and charm, you would be gone for good. It’s better to keep those wounds closed anyway. 
You didn’t seem to think the same though. A half an hour later, while Keigo was sitting on the same couch you abandoned with his second glass of wine and the balcony door cracked to let in some of that cool spring air, you returned to the living room. You were out of your dazzling outfit from tonight, your face scrubbed free of makeup and only wearing one of his old shirts. You looked amazingly sexy to him like this. 
But he didn’t try to make a move or grab at you as you sat down. He didn’t even look at you. He knew you were there for a reason. You reached a hand out to stroke the burn scar that jet from the side of his jaw down to the column of his neck. “Your burn is healing,” you softly pointed out. “You know, you never really told me what happened to get you that.” 
Your fingers gently stroked his jaw, tentative and tender. “You never asked,” Keigo muttered, sipping on his Merlot. You leaned your head against the back of the couch, giving him a soft-eyed stare. “That’s ‘cause you’d never tell.” 
Keigo did his best to keep calm, but he hated this game you were playing with him. You were crossing a line with him here. He finally looked at you, accusingly.“What are you doing, huh?” He uttered, irked.“Why are you doing this?” 
“Doing what?” You asked. “I’m only asking you a question, Kei.” You truly didn’t know which pissed him off even more. “No, you’re trying to act like you’re asking a question when really, you’re poking the bear and blowin’ my buzz.” 
His tone was harsh and so are his words, but they were enough to coax you to speak your mind. You sat up and hugged your knees to your chest as you stared at him.“You never tell me about your scars.” 
Keigo flinched at your statement and his ghosts of scars littering his body seemed to itch.“That’s not true.” 
“It is,” you protested, your voice strained. You sounded close to tears and that hurt him even more. “You never share anything with me. Nothing about your missions, your friends, your past, nothing. I feel like I barely know you and we’ve been together for a year!” 
The frustration you were feeling was evident in your voice. Keigo sighed, placing his wine glass down on the glass coffee table in front of him. He looked at you, noticing how exhausted you looked aside from your irritated: dark circles under your eyes, a tight jaw.“Y/N, it’s just hard, okay? It’s not that simple to just tell you shit like that.” 
“Even though I have?” you retorted harshly, tilting your head to give him a fixed, sideways stare.“I’ve told you everything about me from the jump, Keigo. Even the things I wouldn’t even tell my closet friend! Don’t I deserve the same transparency?” 
Keigo heaved an exhausted sigh and ran his hands down his face. In the darkness behind his hands, he saw Twice’s body go limb, the blade of Keigo’s sword impaling his body.“I’ve done some fucked up shit,” he whispered into his hands. 
You placed a hand on his back.“I’d never judge you,” you promised. "We all make mistakes and none of us are perfect.” 
‘But you are,’ he thought. You are more than perfect. Way too much for someone like him. “I just can’t, okay?” he huffed, moving away from your touch. He ignored the hurt in your eyes. “Some things are just too painful to go back to, and I’d think with as much as you love and respect me, you’d respect my decision to keep things to myself.” 
“Well, I don’t!” you shouted abruptly, standing up to glare down at him. “So…now what?” 
Keigo stared up at you, feeling a flood of emotions begin to swarm him: gratefulness for your determination and stubbornness; confusion as to why you want someone like him; and anger for your refusal to leave this alone. He just wants to protect you from the messiness of himself. Why can’t you see that? 
The words are out before he can stop them and he regrets having that second glass:“Why are you so hellbent on making me your fuckin’ project, huh?” he cooly asked you, his voice as cold as ice. 
Your glared softened a bit.“What are you talking about?” 
He stood up too, giving you a sharp glare that made all of the color in your face drain.“You look at me as this tragic hero you’re tryna fix, don’t you?” he snapped. “I may have the sob story that almost every fuckin’ pro has, but I’m not a puzzle for you to figure out and I don’t appreciate being seen as that.” 
You gaped at him, your mouth open agape.“Are you serious right now?” you scoffed incredulously.“Keigo, I’m only trying to get to you to know you. And you’re not a project or a puzzle–you’re an amazing, passionate man that I adore and I just want to fuckin’ know you!” 
The scream ripped from your throat after being buried under months of frustration and stress. Keigo could hear it as clear as day. He stood there, shocked, as you began to break down, your hands covering your face as you cried. 
“Is that too much?” you sobbed into the open air.“Why won’t you let me in? Why won’t you let me see you?” He could see every ounce of frustration and hurt that he was causing you begin to take its toll, rolling down your cheeks in fat tears that plopped onto the cherrywood floor below your painted toes. 
Keigo immediately strode over to you and closed the gap between your bodies by wrapping his arms around you. He held you as you quietly sobbed into his chest, gripping his arms as you did. He felt horrible. He had never felt more like shit for making you feel like this.“I’m sorry,” he whispered.“It’s not that I don’t want to, baby bird. But I’m just too ugly.” 
You stared up at him, astounded at his confession. “Just trust me on this, okay? You’d need a fuckin’ team to help clean this mess up. I don’t want to burden you with that.” 
“But you’re not a burden!” you protested, tears in your pretty eyes.“You’re anything but a burden to me, Kei! I just wanna understand you.”
You cupped his face in your hands, forcing him to stare at you.“Why do you feel the need to hide yourself from me?” You implored, begging him to answer. 
He groaned tiredly, gently taking your hands off of his face. “Y/N, just drop it, alright?” he implored. He turned, wanting to walk away from this entire situation. 
You followed, ever the stubborn one. “But why–“ 
“I said drop it!” Keigo bellowed, and his wings flared before he could stop them, his feathers sharpening to points. You frozen immediately, your eyes widening in fear like a deer in headlights. 
He and you were both shocked at Keigo’s sudden change in demeanor. He had never reacted this way towards you, because you were never perceived as a threat to him. But something in his hawk-like instincts saw you as one right now. In that brief moment, you were a villain to him, and that frightened him beyond words. 
Quickly, his muscles loosened and he fluffed his feathers out, lowering his wings down against his back. “Y/N,” he began softly, wanting to apologize. But it was too late. Instantly, you turned around and sprinted away from him until you were up the stairs and slamming the guest room door behind you once again. 
Keigo was left standing there, feeling like the worse person on the planet. And he was. His head began to fill with every negative thought that haunted him at night: You’re a loser. You’re a fake. You’re a horrible boyfriend. You don’t deserve her. You should just leave so she can find someone better. 
So what does Keigo do when his head is his worst enemy? He goes out and patrols. 
He finished his wine before heading upstairs to his bedroom and entering his walk-in closet to suit up. After putting on his hero gear, he passed by your room. Though the door is unlocked, he knocked anyway and waited for your little grunt of acknowledgement before he entered. You were sitting in the black armchair facing the small balcony of your guest room, your legs tucked against your chest. 
You didn't face him when he slid inside. “I’m gonna go out and patrol,” he said, getting right to the point. “You know the alarm code to turn it on, right?” 
“I’ve got it, Keigo,” you muttered numbly. “Just go.” You still didn’t look at him and it pained him greatly. “I’ll be back tonight as soon as I can,” he weakly said, trying to vain to ease the fire he caused. 
“Don’t bother,” you grumbled. “Just go. I’ll see you whenever you get back…if you decide to come back.” 
Realizing you were never going to acknowledge his presence, Keigo silently left your room, his heart breaking in two. He then strode over to the balcony in his living room, slipped out the door he left unlocked specifically for himself, and took off from the terrance, his crimson wings flapping into the night. 
He has been out here since, desperately trying to clear his head as he stares into the night and the rain. He stares up at the sky, watching the droplets fall. "Give me some answers here,” he pleads, not sure who he’s talking to–God; the rain; the universe. 
Almost as if he is heard, his work phone suddenly rings. He usually keeps it in the pocket of his hero gear pants, fully-charged, of course. 
He slips it out and looks down at the caller ID, finding the HPSC chief’s name on his screen. 
“Fuck,” he mutters, rolling his eyes. He knows that whatever it is, it can’t be good. He answers the call with an annoyed, “Hawks.” 
“We need you out and patrolling,” the HPSC chief bluntly said, his voice gruff and aggressive. “We got another tip on the villain that has currently been terrorizing the city since the beginning of the month. A couple of civilians reported that they spotted him near the bridge. We’ve already got Mirko and a couple of others down there patrolling in different areas. We need you to join in case he attacks and civilians may need help.” 
Immediately, Keigo rises from his spot on the building and cracks his neck. “Got it. I’ll be there in five.” As soon as he hangs up, he stretches out his wings and proceeds to head towards the bride that hangs above the Musutafu river, doing his best to fly among the pounding rain and thunder. 
When he finally makes it to the bridge, he finds himself breathless at the chaos: the bridge is completely cut in half, one of the sides slipping down into the murky depths of the blackened water below; vehicles slide across the apsault into the water as their passengers scramble to safety, being escorted by other heroes to the other side of the bridge that is still intact. Yellow, inflatable lifesaver boats bob against the black water below, either to catch anyone who falls or look for bodies. 
The villain has already begun his attack, Keigo realizes. He doesn’t see the guy now, but he knows he’ll have to put everything into stopping him if he’s this powerful and deranged with his quirk. He cannot be Keigo tonight. He has to be Hawks. 
But before he springs any further into action, he quickly flies over to the rocks several feet away from the bridge onto the river’s shore. The only things here are the waves, the rain, and him. His hands shake as he dials your number, tiny, wavering breaths leaving his lips. He doesn’t know why he feels so small and so scared right now, but something about this mission and leaving things with you the way they are don’t sit right with him. 
So he calls you. When you don’t pick up, he expects it, but even so, he wants to hear your voice before he goes into this fight. But at least you’ll be able to hear his. When the beep signals the beginning of his voicemail, he doesn’t have time to think of what to say. He just says it. 
“Hey, it’s me,” he sighs. “Hero's Commission called. They need me down at the bridge in case a villain attacks tonight. Supposedly, he’s been making trouble for over a month now and we’ve been trying to track him.” 
He trails off, his brain trying to think of what else to tell you. Anything he’s sure he’d regret not saying sooner if he happens to kick the bucket tonight. “I’ll be home as soon as I can, but if for some reason that doesn’t happen, just know that I’m so sorry I’m so fucked up.” He presses a fist to his pounding head, gritting his teeth in frustration. “I just don’t tell you about it, about me, because I don’t want you to worry and…” 
He pauses, gnawing at his bottom lip. The words push at his throat, threatening to rip from his chest. 
“Dammit, because I love you,” he declares, strained and his heart pounding as fast as a hummingbird’s wings. “I’m so, so in love with you, and I’m so afraid that if I’m to ever tell you why I am the way that I am, you’ll never love me or want me in the same way. I…” 
He trails off, a sob leaving his mouth. He covers it at first, afraid someone might hear, but no one is around. No one but him. “I’m so scared you’ll leave,” he confesses, his voice wavering. “But I just keep pushing you away from me,” he says, his voice trembling. “I keep fucking this up for myself.” 
The dam behind his eyes breaks and he begins to softly sob to himself, keeping himself as quiet as he can so he doesn’t scare you. How lame to be crying to your girlfriend in a voicemail. 
But as quickly as it came, it vanishes and he pulls himself together. He clears his throat and takes his goggles off to wipe at his eyes. “This voicemail didn’t go the way I wanted it to,” he chuckles dryly. “Just know that this is how I feel about you and I promise I’ll be home.” 
Without another word, he ends the voicemail and stares out at the bridge. The sound of terrified and panicked screams echoes in the wind. Sounds of chaos. 
Keigo balls his hands into tight fists at his sides and pockets his phone. But not before turning it off entirely. 
************* 
“Just take a deep breath, honey,” your friend soothes you over the phone. “Everything’s gonna be okay.” 
“But what if it’s not?” you pitifully sob into the phone. “He’s out there right now, I have no idea where he is, and the last thing on his mind conscious is us fighting!” 
You’re sitting on the couch now in Keigo’s penthouse, still in his shirt. His coffee table is littered with a half-empty glass of wine, his opened bottle of Merlot that you started guzzling down, and bits of weed from the clumsy blunt you rolled for yourself to soothe your nerves. 
None of that helped you, so now you’re here, about to tear your hair out. When Keigo had left, you ventured out of the guest room to rummage through his wine and his weed since both aren’t hands-off for you. “Anything that’s mine is yours, baby bird,” he had told you a year ago when you had spent the night and forgot your toothbrush. He shared his with you with no problem. 
That was the first time you had spent the night with him after a magical date and some even more magical sex. You had fallen hard, and him even harder, since the first day he saw you, in fact. 
You had been walking to work, looking so pretty in your pink blouse and your work slacks with an ass that could stop traffic. It had stopped Keigo dead in his tracks. He was doing day patrols and had caught sight of you, causing him to lose track of his conversation with a police officer about the possibility of new villains. 
He didn’t catch up with you and spit game immediately as he usually did with women he was interested in. First, he flew alongside you at a distance you couldn’t see him to make sure you got to work safely. Then, after realizing you worked as an interior designer, he had pretended he was in need of renovating his agency. 
“I just need a little bit of color, y’know?” he said as he sat in your office, loving your smell and your eyes. “Like this pretty pink you’ve got on.” He eyed your blouse, smirking at the way you froze when you realized he was flirting. 
You had never been flirted with so openly before like that, especially by a pro. And especially by someone as sexy and as charming as Hawks. His boldness and confidence turned you on and you found yourself wanting more of him. When he asked for your card (for business purposes), you had agreed. The renovations for his agency never happened, but a date did. 
That was all just a year ago. Now here you are now, all stress and uncertainty and marijuana smoke in your lungs. “I should’ve never brought any of it up,” you lament. “I feel like a fucking asshole.” 
“Sweetie, you’ve been with the guy for a whole year!” your friend argues. “If he hasn’t opened up to you by now and shown you the him he is without the cameras in his face and his hero facade on, then he isn’t the one for you.” 
You know she’s right, but the idea of leaving Keigo pains you beyond words. You have too much invested into him to just leave when things get tough. You knew what you were getting into the moment you decided to embark on the journey of a romantic relationship with him since he happens to be a hero. 
You told him and yourself you were fine with the late nights where he’d be MIA and the missed calls. The constant wondering and worrying. The sneaking around and being discreet about your relationship for the sake of his status. 
All you want in return is some closeness. Some vulnerability. Something to make you feel like you’re wanted and cherished the way you want and cherish him. But he’s never given you any. You sometimes question if you’re asking for too much from him, knowing how hard his job is and how stressed he can be. 
But even so, the yearning to know his secrets still pushes at you every time he brushes off a new scar or tells you vague events of his past that end in him not wanting to talk about it anymore. And though you respect him enough to leave it alone, you know you need more. 
“Has he even told you he loves you?” your friend asks, bringing you back down to earth. 
You flush at her words. “We haven’t gotten there yet,” you reply, almost embarrassed by the fact. “I’ve been holding back telling him because I know his job is hard and…” 
‘And I don’t wanna scare him,’ you think. You know this is the longest relationship Keigo has had. You as well since your past relationships had never gone past a couple months or sex. But with Keigo, it’s different. You feel safe with him. You can be wholeheartedly and undoubtedly yourself. You love him, but you keep it inside. All to keep him comfortable. 
“Now what if I don’t get the chance to tell him at all?” you ask, quickly beginning to cry again. Every word left unspoken begins to bubble at your throat, coming out in anguished sobs. 
“Okay, stop,” you friend firmly says. “First off, put down any alcohol or smoke ‘cause it’s making you paranoid.” You eye the wine and the weed littering the coffee table. 
“Second, Keigo is going to come home to you. He just went out for a breather and he’ll be back. Plus, he’s a smart guy and he’s a pro! He knows how to get himself out of any kind of situation.” You listen to your friends word, taking deep breaths to calm yourself. “I guess you’re right,” you weakly say. 
“I am right,” she states with conviction. “Just rest for now and when he comes home, give him time to decompress. Then tomorrow, you can apologize and talk about what happened. Simple, right?” 
You nod, but even as you try to persuade yourself that your friend’s words are true, you still feel that twist in your gut at the idea of tomorrow. What if he isn’t here tomorrow? What if you pushed him so hard that he left? Or what if something worse has happened? 
“Just sleep, honey.” Your friend’s words drift to your ear again like a prayer; beacons in the void of darkness. “Everything is going to be okay.” 
Though you don’t really believe her, you do as she says anyway. After she hangs up, you clean up the living room and venture back to your guest room to sleep off your frustrations. The effects of the wine and the blunt combined with the aftermath of crying hit you immediately, making it easy to drift off to sleep. 
You sleep for over three hours until you awaken in the darkness of the guest room. Groggily, you look at the clock: 2:04 AM. Immediately, you reach for your phone which you put on ‘do not disturb’. There, on the screen, are one missed call and one voicemail from Keigo. 
Your heart skips a beat and the fogginess of sleep leaves your head as fight the urge to ignore it. This could be important. You click on the message and put it on speaker, placing your phone flat on the bed. You bring your knees to your chest and hug yourself, tucking your nose into Keigo’s shirt collar and breathing in his cologne. 
The beginning of the message is disoriented and loud, the sound of the wind cutting through before you hear Keigo’s beautiful, wonderful voice. As soon as you hear him, you’re calm. 
“Hey, it’s me. Hero's Commission called. They need me down at the bridge in case a villain attacks tonight. Supposedly, he’s been making trouble for over a month now and we’ve been trying to track him.” 
Your heart drops into your stomach. A villain attack. Of course! That’s why he isn’t home yet. “Oh, my God,” you fearfully whisper, covering your mouth. 
“I’ll be home as soon as I can, but if for some reason that doesn’t happen, just know that I’m so sorry I’m so fucked up. I just don’t tell you about it because I don’t want you to worry and…” 
He trails off and you swear, your soul leaves your body as you anticipate his next words. But nothing could’ve ever prepared you for them. As soon as you hear those three little words that mean so much to so many, your breath hitches and you come back to life, feeling like you’ve been dead all night: 
“Dammit, because I love you. I’m so, so in love with you, and I’m so afraid that if I’m to ever tell you why I am the way that I am, you’ll never love me or want me in the same way. I…I’m so scared you’ll leave.” 
His voice begins to tremble and waiver, hitching as he begins to cry. You’ve never heard him cry before. Your heart aches for him, your body desperate to be against his. 
“But I just keep pushing you away from me. I keep fucking this up for myself.” 
“No,” you whisper, beginning to cry yourself. The fact that he’s felt this way for so long, suffering in silence, is a reality that is worse than anything you could’ve imagined. 
Finally, he clears his throat and you know that the end of the voicemail is near. “This voicemail didn’t go the way I wanted it to. Just know that this is how I feel about you and I promise I’ll be home.” 
When the voicemail ends, you sit there in silence, the newfound information processing in your brain. All you can think about is one thing that you still cannot believe is a fact as true as day: ’He loves me. He really loves me.’  
Suddenly, everything makes sense and the world is clearer to you. All the uncertainty and doom you felt have vanished, replaced with a fluttering in your heart that belongs only to Keigo. Delirious with need, you jump out of bed and immediately go to his bedroom to search for his sweatpants and a hoodie. ‘I have to go find him. I need to see him.’ 
You don’t know where he is or where he could be calling from, but if there is a villain attack then social media will have the first place to search. As you venture into Keigo’s master bedroom to search for clothes, preparing to fight the rain and the city’s chaos to find him, a sound stops you. 
It is the sound of the click of the lock to the balcony doors. Then the sound of the doors as they slide back. 
“Hawks,” you immediately whisper to yourself. Then, louder, “Hawks!”, as you immediately race out of the bedroom to the living room just in time to see him walking through the doors after landing on the terrace. 
“Keigo!” you gasp, every emotion hitting you at once watching him in the dark living room. The only light is from the big, silver moon illuminating Keigo while the rest of him is shrouded in darkness. 
“Hey,” he tiredly greets you as he shuts the door behind him. You feel like God as blessed you bringing him home in one piece. Now, you can really tear into his ass. “God, why didn’t you call and tell me you’d be back?” you snap, not daring to let him rest for a second. “I’ve been worried sick about you! I was gonna…” 
Your words die in your throat when the overhead light that automatically switches on according to body movement flicks on, coating the room in a golden glow that shines right on Keigo and the fresh bruises and scratches he’s sporting. He doesn’t look that bad, but you can tell his right eye socket is swelling and his wings look ragged and worn “Keigo,” you softly gasp, the word almost getting caught in your throat. That’s all you can begin to say. 
“You listen to my voicemail?” he asks curiously, but not rudely. You nod slowly, mouth still open in awe. “A villain destroyed the bridge and nearly had every vehicle on there goin’ into the river. He has the ability to extend his limbs, so he made a couple of other extended arms and legs to go along with ‘em.” He huffs in annoyance. “Motherfucker looked like Doc Ock from Spiderman.” 
“Is everyone okay?” you softly ask. 
“After a couple of my coworkers and I got to the guy, yeah,” Keigo replies, kicking off his boots. He places his goggles on a nearby table. “First, I had to fetch as many bodies as I could that the fucker kept flingin’ over the bridge to taunt me. Gang Orca and Eraserhead took care of the rest of the civilians once I caught up to the villain. Then it was just us vs. him. Once Eraserhead got near him, he took the fucker's quirk and the cops put him in handcuffs.” 
“That’s good,” you reply, relief filling you. Mostly at the fact that he’s still here, alive and breathing. Silence falls between you, tense and filled with unspoken words. You nervously wriggle your fingers, feeling small under Keigo’s unwavering gaze. “Listen, Kei,” you nervously begin. “I’ve been goin’ crazy in here ever since you left and I’m so, so sorry for–“ 
Keigo suddenly puts up a hand to silence you. Your words abruptly cut off and you button your lip, your heart pounding in your chest. You wonder if he can hear how loud it is because you sure can. It is pumping wildly in your ears, making you even more of a nervous wreck. 
“Since you got my voicemail, you probably already know a lot of what I’m about to say, but I’m goin’ to tell you properly because you deserve it.” He takes a deep breath, preparing himself. You stay silent and patient, waiting for him to come to grips with whatever he is fighting. “I suppose I should be grateful that eight-armed dickhead decided to cause commotion tonight,” he dryly chuckles. “I had went out to clear my head; to distract myself. What better way to do all that than to kick some ass and save some lives?” 
He unzips his jacket and lets it fall to the floor, revealing his shirt and toned arms underneath. “But while I was doin’ all of that, other than thinking about stopping that villain and saving the innocent lives of all of those people, all I could think about tonight was you.” 
His gaze soften as he looks at you. Your heart pumps a bit faster. 
“I thought to myself, ‘when I finally put this motherfucker behind bars, when my mission is finally done, I’m going home’.” 
He steps toward you, eyes still locked with yours, never wavering. It makes you tremble in your position. “‘And as soon as I get home, I’m falling to my knees, begging for forgiveness, and showing my baby all of me and more because she fucking deserves it’.” 
He takes another two steps toward you before suddenly dropping to his knees in front of you. “So this is me doin’ all of that now. Plus, showing you how much I love you.” 
He leans toward you and wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you closer to him so his face is pressed into your stomach. You stare down at him in awe, unable to speak. You’re afraid that if you do, the moment will disappear and so will he. 
“I never said I before,” Keigo continues, “because I was afraid it wasn’t the right time or I’d end up fucking everything up for myself. Plus, loving someone always seems to backfire on me.” He strokes up your thigh, holding onto your hip. “So I kept it in, just like everything I haven’t told you yet.” 
His hands, so careful yet so strong, trail up your hips and ball into his shirt, gripping the fabric. When his hands and shoulders begin to tremble, you realize he’s crying. You’ve never seen him cry before. It is a sight you never want to see again. 
“I’m a mess, Y/N,” he tearfully says. “When we met for the first time, I never wanted you to see any of that. I didn’t even want this to turn into what it is now, but I’m so, so grateful it hasn’t.” He looks up at you, eyes red and wet with tears. “I’m so happy you didn’t leave.” 
Your heart wrenches at the sight of your boyfriend–so sad and so broken. How is a person as bright-eyed and confident as Hawks also someone like this? He must have hid all of this from you for some time. You wrap your arms around his neck, cupping the back of his head in one of your hands. “Keigo, I’d never leave you.” Your fingers caress his blonde curls, stroking his head softly. “I promise.” 
“You can’t promise me that,” he croaks, shaking his head. “How do you know you won’t get tired of me? How do you know I won’t scare you off?” 
“Keigo, you’re scaring me now,” you confess, feeling your own fresh set of tears beginning to make an appearance. “I’m scared we won’t make it because you refuse to open up to me.” 
Keigo’s expression changes to one of confusion, his eyes narrowing as he scowls at you. “So you’re telling me that if I tell you all about my childhood, you promise you won’t leave?” he asks, a bite in his voice. “If I tell you about the abuse, the trauma, the shit I witnessed from my own parents, being stripped of my name when the Hero’s Commission picked me up, learning that the same man who saved me and inspired me to become a hero is a fuckin’ abuser, you’d stay?” 
You stare down at him, dumbfounded and horrified. You never knew any of this, though you did know the part about Endeavor since it was all over the news. But that other stuff? Keigo kept entirely to himself, leaving you in the dark. 
“What about the scars?” He moves away from you slightly to strip himself of his shirt, revealing a very impressive, toned upper body and a slew of scars–some new and some healed. “All the training I forced to undergo by the Hero Commission. Some that have barely healed from nearly dying during missions. This burn here that I got tryna save a fuckin’ villain.” 
He points at the burn on his jaw and your stomach lurches. “Twice?” you ask, your eyes wide. “You tried to save Twice?” You know a little bit about this event, mostly because it was publicized everywhere and Keigo was forced to tell you some of what happened after he had nightmares. But now that a year has gone by and most of the LOV have been arrested, it has become old news. People have moved on. 
But Keigo obviously hasn’t. He visibly cringes at the sound of Twice’s name, the trauma still fresh. “And what about him?” He demands, his voice cracking. “What about the fact that I fucking killed him?” 
“Keigo, he was a villain,” you firmly respond, taking his hands into yours. “You gave me a chance. He didn’t take it.” 
But this isn’t enough to calm Keigo down. He crumbles again, his lips trembling and eyes welling with tears. You instantly wrap your arms around him and hold him, cradling his head. “I feel like a fucking monster, Y/N,” he sobs into your stomach, gripping you for dear life. “I feel like I’m drowning and I’m gonna pull you right in with me. I don’t want that. I just wanna make you happy…” 
His fingers slide under your shirt to expose your stomach and he presses his face there, wetting your skin with tears. “Can you really love a monster like me?” he whispers against your skin. 
He begins to cry again, his body wracked with sobs and soft whines that tear at your soul. A lone tear drips down your face as you continue to cradle your boyfriend like he’s a child. And right now he is–he’s the exact neglected, abused, broken child he alluded to minutes before. You picture him as a little boy, roaming the streets of his home, doing anything and everything to survive because no one cared enough to care for him. You’ll make sure that never happens again. You swear it. 
Gently pushing him away from your stomach, you take his hands into yours and join him on the floor. He stares at you in awe, eyes red and face wet. “I have two answers for you,” you gently coo, smoothening his hair back. “To answer your first question is yes, I promise I’ll stay as long as you show me everything.” 
You cup his jaw and caress the burn scar. His eyes flutter closed at your touch, tears sparkling on his blonde lashes. “I want it all, Keigo: the scars; the bruises; the wounds. Tell me every secret you have; every dream and aspiration; every fear that keeps you up at night.” 
You lean in to kiss the burn then his bruised eye. “Let me take all of it, especially your pain.” You continue to kiss his face before trailing down to his neck and shoulders; his arms and collarbone; his chest and pert nipples. You kiss every bruise, scar, and burn you find, your fingers trailing over them. You treasure every soft moan and gasp he lets out, happy to have them over sobs and whines of anguish. 
“I don’t wanna fix you–I just wanna water you; nurture you; watch you grow the way you’ve done me.” You look at him then, cupping his face in your hands. “I just wanna love you the way you deserve to be loved.” 
His eyes widen an inch at your confession. “Yes, I love you, Keigo,” you softly giggle. “That’s my answer to your second answer: yes, I can love a monster. But you’re not a monster, Keigo. You’re just a human, even with these big ass wings.” 
You gently tickle a wing with your fingers, making him laugh under his breath. “You’re an intelligent, strong, beautiful man who deserves every inch of my love,” you whisper to him as you lean toward him, nuzzling your face into his neck. You breathe in his scent of sweat and cologne, committing it to memory. 
Keigo holds you to him, cradling your head to his neck. His hold on you is fierce and passionate, validating his feelings for you even before he utters them. “I really love you, you know that?” he whispers against your ear. Your heart jumps and a joyful grin stretches across your face. You look up at him, tracing every single feature of his pretty face with your eyes. “I do now,” you softly reply. 
He smiles at this, the act finally reaching his beautiful eyes. You trail your thumb over his bottom lip, your stomach curling at the plumpness of it. “Wanna smoke?” you ask, raising a playful eyebrow. 
At the mention of rolling up, Keigo’s wings ruffle excitedly and you giggle. “I thought you’d never ask,” he sighs, sounding like he needs it. With no hesitation, you help him to his feet and proceed to set up. You ask him to roll the blunt which he does, his fingers and tongue working expertly to tighten the blunt in a way you can’t. But then again, Keigo has always been good with his hands and mouth. 
After he finishes, you begin to pass the blunt back and forth between each other as you play your music from your phone, the sound of SZA filling the living room. Soon, you’re feeling light as a feather and high as a kite. Your body and mind are relaxed, especially feeling the solid chest of your man underneath you as you lie against him. 
The blunt lays on the ashtray on the coffee table now, smaller now after use. You reach for it and pinch it between your index and thumb before taking a puff, the end of the blunt turning red like an angry firefly. As soon as the smoke hits your lungs, you’re falling deeper into that sea of bliss. You look up at Keigo, finding his eyes fluttered closed. At first you think he's sleep, but his arm circling around your waist tells you different. “Feelin’ good, Kei, baby?” you coo to him, your eyes flickering between his eyes and his lips. You desperately want to kiss them. 
“Mmm,” he hummed, a content smile on his pretty face. The sight makes you giggle. You start to laugh even more when he suddenly circles his other arm around you and pulls you into his lap. “Don’t want you to leave,” he mutters to you as he grips your waist, firmly holding you to him. 
You wrap your arms around his neck, kissing his forehead. “You have me,” you whisper to him. He looks up at you, eyes slightly red and glinting with adoration for you. “And you have me,” he replies, soft conviction in his voice. 
“Promise?” you utter hopefully. He slowly nods, staring at you the same way you do him: intensely; adoringly. Your fingers trail up his chest, his heart pounding underneath your fingertips. ‘He’s real,’ you think. ‘And all mine. And I need him.’ 
The want and need for Keigo and his body dawns on you quickly, quickly taking its toll on you. Your nipples harden and your thighs squeeze together as you begin to strip him out of his clothes with your eyes. “Prove it then,” you demand, need crawling into your voice. “Prove how much you love me. Prove to me that things will be different.” 
Realization alights behind Keigo’s eyes and his expression darkens slightly. It excites you. He coaxes you off of his lap before standing to meet you. “Come here,” he coos, already taking your hand in his. “Let’s get cleaned up.” You nod, excitement and anticipation filling your core with warmth as he leads you up the steps and straight down the hallway to his master bedroom. 
Keigo has over four bathrooms in his penthouse: in his bedroom, guest room, down the hall, and living room where his washer and dryer sit closest to the kitchen. The bathroom in his bedroom is by far the most beautiful, complete with marbled sink counters, a whirlpool tub, and a walk-in shower with a sliding glass door and one of those shower heads that make the water look like a rainforest waterfall. 
You watch, trembling in anticipation as Keigo gets the shower ready. He makes sure it’s at the right temperature to warm you up but not burn you before turning to face you, lust in his eyes. He then begins to undress himself, taking everything off until his hero gear is on the floor and he’s standing before you, completely bare. 
You’re silent, unable to speak. You’re too tongue-tied at the sight of your man’s body displayed before you like an all-you-can-eat buffet. Keigo is not extremely buff, but he still has some impressive muscles, including well-defined abs and a V-line that trails down to his tufts of darker blonde curls that you desperately want to venture towards. His gorgeous, muscled body is unfortunately scarred as well, fresh bruises and cuts coating his skin from the mission he just completely tonight. In addition, he still has scars from where Dabi burned him a year ago, the skin tight and pruned. You feel tears prick your eyes, realizing that it’s quite possible that you would’ve never seen his gorgeous body again. 
You close the gap between you and lay your hands flat on his chest. With your eyes locked with his, you begin to kiss every single old scar and bruise that adorns his soft, tanned skin. You’re careful with those that look fresh, making sure to skip those and focus on the ones that have been on Keigo’s body for months if not years. 
As you do, you find pleasure in the tiny sighs and groans that leave his lips, knowing he’s enjoying this TLC. It makes you feel good to know you’re making him feel good. You want him to know you enjoy every single part of him, no matter if he’s scarred or not. You think he’s beautiful. 
Finally, he pulls you away and gives you an excitably, darkened stare. You know what he wants now. Quickly, you go to strip yourself of his shirt, but he stops you. “Let me,” he gently orders, and you let your arms go limp at your sides. He presses his lips to yours and pulls you into a passionate, wet kiss as his hands slide up under his shirt. 
You softly moan into his mouth as you feel his hand on your bare skin. “You look so fuckin’ good in my clothes,” he whispers against your lips. “Even when you’re pissed at me, you still wear my shit.” 
He brings the shirt up more, exposing your panties, stomach, and bare breasts to him. He groans as he pulls the shirt up over your head and flings it across the bathroom before ducking down to play with your tits. He latches one of the hardened peaks of your nipples into his mouth, swirling his tongue around and around. 
You moan a little louder, your hands grasping his shoulders. “Missed you,” you softly utter, biting back another moan as his tongue teases your hardened nipple. He peers up at you, smiling. “I missed you too, baby,” he whispers. “So much.” He presses his lips to your other breast, his fingers sliding down your sides. “M’so sorry for everything. I never should’ve pushed you away. I–“ 
“Hush,” you say, pressing a hand to his cheek. He looks up at you, regret in his eyes. “Show me how sorry you are now.” He doesn’t need to be told twice. Immediately, he stands and takes your hand to walk you into the steaming-hot shower. As soon as you are under the jets of hot water, Keigo pushes you against the tiled wall and presses a passionate kiss to your lips. 
You moan softly against his lips, wrapping your arms around him to bring him closer to you; as close as he can possibly be. He puts one hand above your head against the wall as he begins to grind his hips into yours, his pelvis pressing delightfully up against your clit. You whimper into his neck as he continues to move against you, his lips caressing your neck and that spot behind your ear that makes your pussy wet and your nipples tingle. 
“You’re so fucking pretty,” he coos. “So beautiful…so sexy…and you’re so mine.” 
The feeling is too much. It overpowers you, making you delirious with need. “I’m all yours,” you practically sob. “Please, Kei; don’t tease me.” 
Keigo moves his head away from your neck to smirk at you. “And so impatient,” he chuckles. His hand sneaks between your thighs where he presses his index and middle fingers between your pussy lips. You gasp at the sensation of his touch, your clit jumping against his palm. “Naughty girl. You’re already wet for me,” he groans. “I suppose you’ve been waitin’ long enough though. Time to show you how sorry I am.” 
After sucking on his fingers, he proceeds to get onto his knees and press his lips against your inner thigh before showering your pussy in kisses that quickly turn into open-mouthed sucks and licks that have you seeing stars. Your hands grab his shoulders, gripping them tightly as his tongue licks every bit of your pussy up, his lips pillowy-soft against your clit. “Fuck, Keigo,” you moan, leaning your head back against the shower wall. “You’re so good at this.” 
Keigo moans into your pussy in response, lashing his tongue in different shapes across your clit. When he suddenly hooks your leg over his shoulder, you squeak in surprise. He looks up at you, eyes shining and a love-drunk look on his face. “I’ve got you, baby,” he coos, staring up at you lovingly. “You know I do, don’t you?” 
Then he’s diving back in, one hand gripping your thigh hiked up to his ear and the other holding you steady by your hip. You’re losing your shit, one hand in his hair and the other gripping his shoulder for dear life. “Shit, Kei!” you cry out, your cries of ecstasy echoing off the shower walls. “Fuck, baby, that feels so…oh, my God!” 
Meanwhile, Keigo won’t shut the fuck up about how amazing and pretty your pussy is. “You have the prettiest fuckin’ pussy, baby,” he coos into your clit, his words slightly muffled. “You’re always so open n’ wet for me. How could I ever neglect this cunt?” 
His words ignite something in you that have you crumbling, all self-control abandoned. The porn-worthy sounds slipping from your lips are drowned out from the sound of the shower as Keigo continues to go waaaaay down south, never letting up. It doesn't take long for that knot in your core to begin to tighten, signaling your oncoming orgasm. “I’m close!” you whimper. “So close! Don’t stop!” 
“Mmm-hmm,” Keigo mumbles into your pussy, still flicking that magical tongue. But when he inserts a finger and curls it up against your G-spot, you just about see God. “Go ahead and cum for me, baby,” he practically begs you, his finger encouraging you further. “Cum for me. Cum all over my face.” 
Your eyes close, plummeting you into darkness as your peak begins to dawn closer and closer the faster Keigo’s finger fucks you. “Please, baby,” he pleads. “I need you. Need all of you.” He dives back into your pussy, sucking on your clit softly in time with his finger stroking your insides and your G-spot. 
Finally, finally, you fall off that hill and cum all over your man’s face as requested. Keigo moans and whines in appreciation as you scream his name, nearly losing your voice. He grips your hips with such force that you can’t move as he licks you clean, his tongue carefully licking over and around your sensitive pussy. When he finally pulls away, his hair is wet and his face gleams with your cum. 
You help him up and clean his face off, running your thumbs over his plump lips. “That was amazing,” you breathlessly giggle. Keigo smiles proudly at you, happy with the praise. “I try.” 
You press a passionate kiss to his mouth, rendering him speechless afterwards. “Now, it’s your turn.” A newfound boldness courses through your veins as you press down onto his shoulders, forcing him to sit down on the bench. “You sure, baby bird?” he asks, raising an eyebrow. “You don’t have to–“ 
“Nah,” you interrupt him firmly. “I’m gettin’ that dick down my throat and you’re gonna enjoy every single second of it.” You settle down onto your knees in between his thighs, your hands trailing up his legs. “My amazing, intelligent hero deserves it.” 
Keeping your eyes locked with his, your nails gently graze up and down his thighs, earning a shiver and a delicious moan that escapes his luscious mouth. His cock quickly hardens even more between his legs, dripping with pre-cum all for you. Without wasting anymore time, you wrap your hand around the base of his length and begin to light peppering his dick in kisses, playing close attention to the sensitive spot at the underside of his cock. 
“Fuck,” he whispers, eyes fluttering closed. You stare up at him, his dickhead in your face, near your lips. “You deserve all of this, honey,” you coo before you wrap your lips around his cock. You take your time with sucking him off, starting by sucking on the pink dickhead as you slowly pump your hand up and down, spitting onto his dick if necessary. 
By the time you take him deeper into your mouth, Keigo’s dick is nice and slick with water and your spit, allowing him to easily slip into your mouth. You continue to pump him up and down, stroking the rest of the length that you can’t fit in your mouth. You swirl your tongue around his head and along his dick, loving how warm his skin is, his masculine scent, and the taste of salt on your tastebuds. You commit all of it to memory, including his beauty face etched in pleasure. 
You take a bit more of him, your mouth stretching around his thick cock, but you don’t do it enough to hit the back of your throat. Not yet. Keigo is in his world. His blonde brows are knitted together in concentration while his chest heaves up and down. His hand immediately goes to your hair as he watches you bob your head up and down on his cock. “Just like that,” he hisses. “Such a good girl. So good for me.” 
His hand travels to the back of your head and gently pushes you down, causing his dick to slip farther into your mouth. You feel him hit the back of your throat finally, causing you to gag and your eyes to water. He keeps his hand on your head as you begin to gag on his cock, your throat pumping up and down, back and forth. 
Despite the year you’ve been with him, you still can’t believe how big he is. He practically fills your throat, stretching out the wet, inner walls until your jaw aches and your eyes begin to tear. But you do it for him and those lovely sounds dripping from his lips. “Fuck, baby bird!” He groans through gritted teeth. “So good! Such a good little slut for me!” His toes curl beside your naked thighs, his hand in your hair and gripping it tightly. 
You continue to give him the Glock Glock 3000, taking extra care to fondle his balls with your other hand. He loves that. He’s a whimpering, whining mess as you continue your work, working him so good that he’s seeing stars. You want to show him you can take everything. 
Finally, he growls deep in his throat and wrenches your head away from his dick. “Enough,” he firmly says. You gasp as you pop off of his dick, a string of saliva following him in his wake as he pulls his dick out of your mouth that droops from your bottom lip. 
You softly pant, catching your breath but also to calm yourself down. You’re becoming hornier by the second. Your pussy is wet and wanting, desperate to be filled, leaving you to rub your thighs together to give yourself some relief. Keigo’s eyes are blown with lust, filling you with excitement and a slight twinge of fear. “Get up,” he demands. 
You oblige and stand on shaky legs. You fortunately don’t have to move on your own. Keigo does the work for you. In an instant, he is behind you with his hands on your hips, forcing you to bend forward. With a squeak, your hands fly to the shower wall and your back arches, presenting your ass and dripping cunt to your boyfriend. 
“So fuckin’ pretty,” he growls, giving your ass a sharp smack that echoes off the shower walls. “Yeah, you like this, don’t you?” He hisses, spanking you again. “Nobody could ever make you feel like this, could they?” 
You whimper, the stinging of his spanks making your pussy tingle. He spanks you again, harder this time, and you yelp. “I didn’t hear that, gorgeous,” he snickers. “Louder for me.” You whimper when you suddenly feel his cock slide against your pussy, nudging your sensitive clit. 
“Yes!” you wail out. “No one makes me feel like you do, daddy!” You turn to look at him, arching your pretty ass further into him and whining your hips around for him. “Please, please fuck me, Kei. I can’t take much more!” Keigo watches your hips and ass, slowing growing more and more needy by the second. 
“Fuck!” The word leaves his lips in a hiss. He instantly grabs your hips, lines his dick up, and sinks inside of you. Finally home. A gasp falls from your open mouth as he sinks in deeper, stretching you out. No matter how many times you do this with him, you’ll always feel full with him. 
Keigo holds your hips and slowly begins to roll his hips into you, sending your clit into hyperdrive with pleasure. You’re a mess at this point, grinding your ass back into him despite his slow pace. “Keigo,” you whine in need. 
Keigo chuckles, still rolling his hips, his dick pumping in and out of you slowly. “Patience, baby. I wanna make it last.” He suddenly lets go of your hips and grabs your tits, squeezing them in his palms and emitting gasps from you. 
“You’re mine, you understand?” He growls into your ear. “You’re. Fuckin’. Mine.” Each word is punctuated by sudden, rough trusts that make your eyes blow and your mouth fall open in a wordless, pleasured O. Now Keigo begins to go faster, snapping his hips forward as the water continues to fall around you in sheets. The only sounds are of the water hitting the shower floor, skin slapping against wet skin, and your breathless moans and gasps of pleasure as Keigo continues to pummel your cunt. You go to rub your clit as he does, but he shoos it away and does it for you, rubbing the bud in time with his relentless thrusts. “No, no, no, baby,” he coos into your ear. “I told you you're mine. Which means this is my pussy too.” 
His other hand suddenly moves to your leg and lifts it up, just enough for you to feel his cock sink deeper into your walls. “Oh, my God!” you holler, your head falling back in pure ecstasy as Keigo continues to fuck you silly with your leg up and his hand on your clit. “Shit, Kei, I’m gonna cum soon!” 
You can feel your orgasm quickly building, that knot in your core about to snap. Keigo moves his body closer to yours and pushes it against the wall, causing your tits to squish erotically against the wet shower door. “Do it, baby,” he growls into your ear, his breath fanning over your face. “Cum for me. Cum all over this dick. Your dick.” 
His words send you over the edge. You tumble down that hill hard and fall into a sea of bliss as your second orgasm washes over you. All you can say is his name and God’s name in vain as you cum all over his cock that has begun to replace its fast pumps with slow strokes, Keigo’s hips doing wonders behind you. 
Keigo holds you to him as you continue to cum, breathlessly moaning into your ear. “You’re so good for me, baby,” he whispers, peppering the side of your face in kisses. “So tight…gonna make me cum soon too…” 
“Do it,” you beg him. “Please cum for me. Cum inside me, daddy.” 
You’re delirious with need for him, all logic going out the window. You and Keigo have always been careful, leading to him usually pulling out before cumming even though you’re on the pill. But after tonight, you want to feel all of him. 
“No.” Keigo’s voice is firm and deep, almost a monstrous growl. It renders you speechless as he suddenly slips out of you and places your leg down. Before you can process what’s happening, he twirls you around and scoops you up into his arms. 
You squeak in surprise at the sudden action, but say nothing as he slides the bathroom door open and exits the shower, causing the water to cut off. He is swift and quick as he makes the trip from his bathroom to his master bedroom. He wastes no time tossing you onto the bed. You gasp as you bounce slightly against the mattress, still wet and naked from the shower. 
When you finally settle onto your back, you stare up at him in confusion. “What are you doing?” you ask, a little giggle leaving your lips. But you stop when you get a good look at him. 
In the dim light of the moon that shines through the window, Keigo looks less than human: his eyes are a dark gold and glowing brightly as he stares down at you, his crimson-colored wings fluffier and frazzled as if someone has touched them too much and caused them to become oversensitive. Gone is the Keigo you know, replaced with a man starving for release and you. 
He suddenly gets on top of you, pinning your hands over your head with one hand. “Here’s what’s gonna happen, baby girl,” he softly growls to you. “I’m gonna put your pretty ass into a mating press. Then I’m gonna fuck you deep, hard, and fast until I spray my cum all in that pretty lil’ pussy of yours. Then, when I’m done, I’m gonna pull out and spray you in the rest of it so people will know you’re mine. And you’re gonna like all of it and take all of it like my good little slut.” 
He leans down so his nose is pressed against yours, his face like a full moon emerging in the sky. “Is that clear?” he gutturally asks. 
Fear and arousal curl in your stomach, chasing each other around so one can be dominating your body and mind. You don’t know how you manage to speak–your mouth is so dry–but you do. A tiny “yes, daddy” leaves your lips as your pussy throbs and begs for him. “I understand,” you whisper. “Please fuck me.” 
That is all Keigo needs. In a blink of an eye, your legs are thrown over his shoulder and he’s sinking his cock deep inside of you. A loud moan leaves your lips as he fills you to the brim, so deep that his balls hit your ass and his pelvis presses against your sensitive clit. You swear he’s never been so deep inside of you before. You can almost feel him in your stomach! 
Keigo leans down so you’re face to face, chest to chest. “Can you feel me, baby?” he coos against your lips. “Is it too much for you? Am I fillin’ that poor pussy up too much?” 
You whine in response, your hands gripping his shoulders. He wolfishly grins down at you, loving your submissive, dumb little state. “Don’t worry; you can take it. You’re a big girl, right?” He begins to rut into you, hips snapping against yours and cock pumping deep into your pussy. “Right?” he growls, purposely angling his hips to aim at your G-spot. 
You’re seeing the entire galaxy now, your pussy spasming around his dick that mercilessly strokes your walls. When he begins to slow down to tease you, you open your mouth to cuss him out, but all that leaves is a high-pitched, incoherent whine. Keigo laughs right in your face, loving this shit.
‘Bastard,’ you think, the only clear thought in your dicked-down, fucked-out mind that isn’t the pleasure or the scent of your boyfriend. ‘Two can play at this game, bitch.’ 
You then take two of your fingers and proceed to lightly stroke Keigo’s feathers, taking extra care to touch each overly-sensitive, buttery-soft feather. It is enough to have Keigo’s eyes widening and his body tensing. You smirk up at him and his reaction, continuing to torture him. “Somethin’ wrong, daddy?” you innocently coo. 
You then move your hands to the tips of his feathers and stroke them one at a time, running the tips of your fingers over each of them. Keigo lets out a high-pitched whine that has your pussy spasming and clenching around his cock. “D-don’t!” He cutely begs. “Gonna cum if you do that!” 
“Then you’d better fuck me then.” You lock your legs tighter around his head and your hands grip him tighter, locking him in. “Cum inside of me,” you demand. “Cum with me.” 
Keigo doesn’t need to be told twice. He snaps back into position and continues to pummel your cunt, his hips snapping forward again and again, driving his cock deeper into you. You gasp and moan beneath him, egging him on as you bounce against the mattress that shakes with the force of his thrusts. “Yes, baby!” you moan loudly, your voice bouncing off the walls. “That’s it! Keep going! I’m so close!” 
You continue to stroke his wings, up and down, in circles, in aimless patterns that start to lose shape as he starts fucking you harder. His hands suddenly take your legs off his shoulder and pin your open thighs down as far as they’ll go as he settles deeper into you, practically mounting you now. 
“You see it now?” he hums hotly against your mouth. “You see how much I love you? How much I need you?” You can’t answer him because he is now kissing you–hard, passionate, and rough. It has you seeing stars and barely catching your breath as he continues to fuck you into the mattress. 
Finally, you begin to feel it: his cock swelling inside of you, signaling the beginning of his end. You look up at Keigo and find his eyes locked with yours, blonde locks in his face and sweat coating his body. “Gonna cum,” he warns. “Gonna fill you up, baby. Fill you with all of me. Gonna fuckin’ nut…” 
You deliriously nod as your pussy spasms and your clit jumps, your third orgasm of the night present. “Me too!” you cry out. “Cum with me, Kei! Fill me up! Make me yours!” 
Keigo doesn’t need you to say anything more. He swoops down to press his mouth to yours in an open-mouthed, tongue-swirling kiss, eating the sounds of your pleasure up as you finally cum all over his cock. He cums too, spilling his seed inside of you without a warning or a second though. A loud moan of your name and a whine of ecstasy leaves his lips as he cums, his hips stilling against yours. 
You feel his cum stream inside of you, warm and overflowing. So much so that your mouth drops open and your eyes widen, the feeling foreign and intense. He coats your inside in all of his nut and doesn’t stop fucking you until his cum is finally dripping down your ass and onto the sheets. 
Keigo pulls out of you quickly, making you whine at the sudden loss. His cum spills out of your pussy, the sight of it lewd yet so arousing. “God, that’s so hot!” he groans, pumping his dick in front of you, his shaft slick with his cum and yours. “Makes me wanna cum again.” 
He suddenly scrambles on top of you and straddles your chest, his dick now in your face. “Open your fuckin’ mouth,” he growls. You do so, opening your mouth and sticking out your tongue for all of him to coat it. 
Keigo cums again, tossing his head back and moaning to the ceiling, his voice echoing off the walls. His cum coats your mouth and tastebuds as well as your tits and face, causing your eyes to flutter shut to avoid getting nut in your eyes. He coats every single inch of your skin in his cum, marking you completely as his. You feel like you’re his now, and you love every inch of it. 
When you finally open your eyes, your face is wet and sticky with cum as are your chest, lips, pussy, and ass. Keigo is coming down from his high, his dick growing soft and eyes dimming. When he finally comes to and gets a look at you, he grows as red as his feathers. “Fuck, look at you!” He gasps, horrified. “Don’t move. Lemme go get a towel.” 
He nearly falls out of the bed trying to get up fast enough to go run to the bathroom. You lie there, covered in cum and sedated by your three orgasms of the night. And then you begin to laugh. They come up in short giggles that reach hysteria until you’re full on guffawing in Keigo’s bed. 
When he finally comes back with a soft towel wet with warm water and a glass of water, he stares at you in confusion. “What?” He asks curiously. 
“Nothing,” you giggle. “That was just…really nice.” You smile sweetly at him as he crawls onto the bed and proceeds to clean you up. He moves the wet towel across your sticky, sweat and cum-soaked skin until you’re finally free of it all. Then he moves to the bedside table to get the massage oil that he’s used on you and himself many times. 
You smile contently as you watch him squirt the tropical-scented oil into his hands and rub them together. He takes his time and is extra careful with your legs as he moves each one into his hands, starting from your feet to your thighs to kneed the tender flesh and massage the oil into your skin. 
His hands are warm and feel so nice against your body as he rubs you down, now moving to your stomach and shoulders. He then works on your arms and hands, taking each finger and gently tugging on each one. He is an expert, paying close attention to your bones and muscles on your hand. You can’t help but be aroused from it, loving the way he takes care of you. 
When he finishes with the front, he turns you onto your stomach and coaxes you to lie flat on the mattress. After he gets more oil, he continues to massage your body, his knuckles pushing into your back muscles and hands kneading the globes of your ass. Your head falls onto the bed in utter pleasure and relaxation, making your muscles less tense and loose.
“Mmm,” you moan as Keigo’s fingers start to kneed into the bones of your shoulders. 
“Feelin’ good, baby bird?” he hums happily.
You nod lazily and he laughs, continuing to work your body into an absolute puddle. You love this: the tenderness that comes after some good sex. All you smell are your boyfriend and the massage oil, the scents relaxing you even further and pushing you towards sleep. 
When it’s finally over, Keigo scoops you off of the bed and you let him, too relaxed and exhausted to do it yourself. “Come on, gorgeous,” he coos. “Let’s get you into bed.” He coaxes you under the covers before settling in beside you. As soon as he’s in bed with you, you snuggle up against his side and he wraps his arms around you, holding you closer than close. 
“Love you,” he murmurs against your forehead that he lays kisses upon. “Love you so much.” 
“I love you too, Kei,” you whisper into his neck, breathing in his smell. Your hand falls to his chest and presses against his heart, feeling it beat against your palm. “I always will.” 
He stares down at you, his gaze soft yet serious. “Then if you ain’t too tired, you in the mood for a very sad backstory?” He asks, a wry smirk playing at his lips. 
Suddenly, all sleepiness and the fog of relaxation are gone. You sit up onto your elbow, your heart beating a bit faster. Keigo is still staring at you, dead serious and waiting for a response. You give it to him by pressing a soft kiss to his lips, cupping his face as you do. “Always,” you whisper against his lips. 
Keigo smiles and presses another kiss to your lips before you lay back down beside him, mentally and emotionally preparing for his story. He doesn’t look at you as he prepares himself, mentally pulling back the pages to the book of his life that he swore not to tell you. But after tonight, that promise is broken. 
“It all starts on the little island of Kyushu,” he begins softly. 
THE END. 
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