#the actual text post is something I believe should have been canon...the tags? -winks- that's just my own personal happiness

[bumblingbabooshka]

I think Tuvok and Neelix should have become riddle buddies. Like they’re just always tossing riddles back and forth idly when they see each other (Tuvok’s are surprisingly easy if you’re knowledgeable in the subject they’re about - Neelix’s are easy for everyone who isn’t Tuvok.) 

[anthonycrowleymoved]

I know this is old discourse but in light of destiel becoming canon, what are your thoughts on neil gaiman not allowing Crowley and Aziraphale to be gay lovers? He said that they're angels, not men, so is that supposed to imply that they're not gay simply cuz they're non-binary (so they're asexual)? I just wanna know if they'e in love or not lol. I ship them so much.

yeah okay this is gonna have to be tagged neil discourse because thinking about this over a year later i’m still mad huh

so like. i know very well what he said at the time. he was basically like, and i’m paraphrasing but that’s because i simply do not care enough to give a direct quote but on twitter he was like ‘oh well angels don’t UNDERSTAND human concepts like GENDER and SEXUAL ATTRACTION so NO they’re NOT GAY’ and then someone was like ‘but they’re in love right?’ and he was like ‘of course.’ right? everyone agrees that’s what happened right after the show aired? and like, okay, i’m not going to begrudge people seeing this as representative of themselves if they’re nb and/or ace, that’s cool and fine, and you do you. i find it interesting that i saw a ton more criticism about it on here than on twitter, but that’s probably just more indicative of who i’m following and how much i’m on here than anything else. anyway.

let’s break this bullshit down and explain piece by piece why i think neil’s quote unquote representation in gomens is a hot garbage fire and why it kind of rubbed me the wrong way from the moment i saw it.

1. he posted it on twitter. he wrote the script and could have like, you know, put it into the show, if them being In Love was like, actually part of the story. he had the ability to do that. gomens was already going to piss off right wing groups because of how it treats religion, this wasn’t something i legitimately think amazon/the beeb would have just said ‘no’ to if neil was serious about it. mean, maybe that’s a bit far into conspiracy territory, but i truly believe if they really wanted to make azcrow canon the one person who could have managed getting a scene would have been the author/showrunner. and because he didn’t if you’re a casual viewer who’s not fucking following his goddamned twitter seeing gay representation is now a rorschach test

‘they don’t adhere to human ways of thinking about gender and sexuality’ MANY THOUGHTS HERE but let’s start with

2. i think hallie originally said this and neil i know you wrote the book but like. did you read the book neil. because i thought one of the main points of it was that aziraphale and crowley had effectively ‘gone native’ and saw themselves more like humans than like celestial beings. and they’d been on earth for all of human history. it’s a bad take i’m sorry i know he literally wrote it but like really. really.

3. look i’m nb and i’d love some nb rep. but that was not nb rep. those were two cis male actors playing (largely) male presenting characters with absolutely no in-text indications that they aren’t cis. there’s one (a few? god it’s been a minute since i watched the show) character referred to by singular ‘they’ and it’s not aziraphale or crowley. and like, look, i get that in real life there’s nb people who don’t go by gender neutral pronouns and that’s cool and fine because that’s what those people feel inside. but, like, this isn’t real life, it’s a tv show, and referring to male presenting characters as he/him and then occasionally putting them in feminine clothing isn’t representation because people who aren’t looking for that kind of representation aren’t going to see it, they’re going to see a joke about a man in a dress

4. and i’m not ace so i can’t speak on that, but i do remember at the time ace people being like ‘that....was not ace rep’ so like, make of that what you will. again, i’m not going to tell you you can’t see them as nb and/or ace, but like, i’m just asking you, was that really representation? like, was it? in your heart like, would you have been happy with that representation if neil didn’t tell you it was representation? because if you’re just starved for content, that’s FINE, you’re ALLOWED, all i’m asking you is to not praise the creator for doing fuck all.

5. ‘of course [they’re in love]’ again where??? where??? where is it neil. where is it in the actual text of the show. like there’s in text evidence that they love each other platonically and there’s lots of jokes made by other characters but like. i hate to say that but that’s it. i don’t know why this off the cusp response still makes my blood boil but boy does it

6. i don’t want to go looking for it because i’ve done that like six times but there’s a post on neil’s tumblr from before the show dropped about how there would be moments that people who ship it would be happy with but it wouldn’t become canon. you can look it up i swear he said that in like....december of 2018ish? something like that. which, again, is fine on its own, but combined with the fact that after he was like ‘lmao that’s what i was going for’......not my favorite look

what i’m saying is like, if he wanted to create an actual queer narrative he could have but he just like, chose not to and then when he realized he could have people watching his show just because they’re thirsty for representation that isn’t there i think he went ‘oh i’ll jk rowling this’ i don’t KNOW that that’s what happened but, like, that’s what it looks like to me.

i used to regularly refer to the “representation” in gomens as nu-queerbaiting, which i still like as a term, because to me it’s the person in charge (not the actors, usually, unless they have some say in the writing process) going, oh no they’re totally in love with each other totally trust me :) and then like, they’re not, not really, not to the people who like, watch the show but don’t fucking follow the author on twitter. and that’s. i’m sorry, that’s not canon to me.

and, to be honest, how this is presented honestly makes me more angry than if it was just maybe in-universe wink wink nudge nudge, because i’m USED to queerbaiting and i know that like, almost nothing ever ever ever comes of it and i get it and i like having fun anyways, so i deal. and like, i was a book fan before the show came out. the book was written in the late 80s, and i knew that it wasn’t going to be anywhere near as gay as the fandom has made that work for thirty goddamned years, and i was fine with that. like, going into it, i joked, but it was fine because it was a relatively faithful adaption of a book i like. i wasn’t looking for gay representation, even though i ship aziraphale and crowley.

but like, there was this wave of people who came looking for representation, and the show is so vague on that concept that they saw it, but it’s like. it’s not actually really there. there’s no one saying ‘yes they’re really irl in love.’ there’s two male-presenting characters who COULD be in love, if you choose to view it like that, but maybe aren’t. and like, that’s FINE, on it’s own, but i hate that someone in a position of power said ‘no you’re right lmao’ even though he didn’t do shit. it was made in 2019. queer representation should be better than that. i’m not patting neil on the back for doing literally nothing.

so like, tldr: yeah the rep is bad in my opinion!!! it’s not good!!!! i don’t like how neil handled it and it’s gross!!!! i hope this answers your question!!!!

anyway that being said azcrow is such a good ship anyway, so like, why does it matter if they’re canon? ship em anyways no one can stop me from doing it even though how it was handled by the actual creator is a garbage fire when you look at it for more than like, thirty seconds. like......why must a ship be ‘canon’? is it not enough to read a book and see two celestial beings, in love with humanity?

[goodluckdetective]

Fic: Letters to Nowhere 1/3

Ship: Destiel, Sam/Eileen

Fandom: SPN

A03: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27829108/chapters/68131141

Warnings: Grief mostly 

Tags: Angst with a happy ending, angst, found families

Characters: Dean, Sam, Castiel, Eileen, others in passing or in clips

Rating: PG-13

Length: 2k this chapter

Summary:

AU Post Inherit the Earth

After God is defeated, Sam decides to text the one person they're still missing with regular updates. Castiel can read them when he gets back. Because they are getting him back. 

This isn’t Chuck’s story anymore. They’ve lost too much to him as it is. They’ve won: it’s time they feel like it. And act like it too.

Author’s Note:

It’s 2012 again, here’s Wonderwall. 

This fanfic is not canon compliant after “Inherit the Earth” cus this is my city now. It’s been a really long time since I watched Supernatural, let alone wrote fic for it, so this is a bit like getting on an old rusty bike for me. I was dragged in with the news like everyone else, and because I am a firm believer of "fix canon yourself" here I am, writing fic for a fandom I only wrote for twice in my teens. 

I wanted a Destiel reunion as much as anyone, but there are a lot of fics about that with the focus so I wanted to do something that also looked at Sam and Cas’ friendship. So this is a ship fic and a found family fic because I have two hands. I wanted this all to be a one shot, but it's 7K already and that's wild, so multi-chapter here we come. I hope to have this complete by the end of the year with an update weekly.

Fic below the cut:

He sends out the first one on the ride home from what should have been the end of the world with a dog in the backseat and the radio set to blast.

His phone has been beeping non-stop since Jack turned the lights back on. Dean’s too, though he can’t answer since he’s driving. Some messages he gets are from hunters he hasn’t heard from in years, folks he thought might have died on the job. He’s shocked they even remember what happened. The rest of the world didn’t. It’s such a departure from the last times they saved the world with nothing but silence and a new crisis to await them. 

Eileen’s text to him causes his breath to catch. It’s a single sentence.

“This is real.”

If Dean notices him tearing up, he doesn’t mention it. He’s all eyes on the road, heading back to the Bunker like this was a regular job. After fifteen minutes of calls and messages, Sam opens his contacts to reach out to the one number he hasn’t heard from. His thumb lingers over “Castiel” about to press down when he remembers.

He looks to Dean, considering saying something, then decides better of it. The jubilation of their win sours in his head, the reminder that one person isn’t here to see it a depressing note on what should be their happy new beginning. They’d asked Jack to bring Cas back too, of course, but apparently his Godhood has limits when it comes to the empty. All he’d been able to provide them with was some leads to opening a portal and a wish of luck. No angel, no promise of resolution. 

“Chuck would love this,” Sam thinks. “We can never have a victory without a loss to ruin it.”

Rage boils in his gut at the thought. This isn’t Chuck’s story anymore. He doesn’t get to dictate their life as an endless repeating tragedy. They’ve lost too much to him as it is. They’ve won: it’s time they feel like it. And act like it too.

He sends off the first message a few minutes later.

***

Hey man, it’s me, Sam.

I know this is kinda stupid: it’s not like you get bars in the Empty or anything. I don’t expect you to get these there. But when you get back, you should still have your phone (Dean said it went with you) and I plan to keep paying the bill so 1. You don’t have to ask someone for payphone quarters and 2. You can easily catch up on what you missed while you wait for us to pick you up.

We won. We are going to get you out of there. Promise. 

***

So we won. Chuck is human now. Score one for Team Free Will 2.0.

But, Jack is gone. Not dead: he sorta became God. It’s a long story. Anyway, apparently Godhood means an anti-interference policy or something, so yeah he’s gone. I’m sorry you didn’t get to say goodbye.

He’s happy though. Which I guess is what matters, right?

We asked him about getting you back before he went hands off. He said he couldn’t grab you himself (something about the Empty being its own thing who knows) but he gave us some leads to start looking. Good leads too. And we’ve done more with less.

***

Eileen is waiting for them when they get back to the Bunker. Sam almost trips over his own feet to pull her into a hug. She laughs and hugs him back, and Sam was so sure he would only hear that laugh again on his voicemail that he starts crying on her nice jacket. She cries on him too, though Sam’s jacket is so covered in dirt and blood that the tears might actually make it cleaner.

Dean doesn’t say a word, just walks past them and mouths to Sam “I’ll be inside, loverboy” with a wink. The dog follows him. As soon as he vanishes behind the bunker door, Sam pulls Eileen into a kiss that is considered impolite to have in front of your sibling. 

After they’ve both calmed down a fraction, Sam fills Eileen in on what she missed, signing as much as he knows. She looks devastated when he tells her about Cas, and Sam remembers that the two of them were starting to become friends. When he tells her about Jack she asks quite a few follow up questions trying to wrap her head around it all. Sam doesn’t blame her: he’s trying to wrap his head around it too.

“So, is it thank Jack now?” She signs, using the hand sign they came up for Jack’s name. 

“I don’t think he’ll care either way.”

She walks towards the bunker, and Sam keeps step with her so she can see his face. “How’s Dean?”

“I don’t know,” Sam signs. “It’s hard to tell with him.” That feels like a massive understatement. Sam is sure he knows Dean the best out of everyone on the planet, but still his brother manages to surprise him. Sam can read through Dean’s bullshit better than most and he’s faster to get a clue when something is up, but figuring out how Dean is doing often feels like decoding a spell. Sam can get the general idea from just looking at it, but for the particulars, he has to put in legwork to decipher exactly what’s on his brother’s mind. All he knows at the moment is that Dean is not okay. The rest is a guessing game until Sam has more clues or Dean spills his guts.

 They walk into the door and head down the stairs. Sam can see the dog, a giant ball of white fur, running around the wooden table in the middle, tail wagging.

 “The dog is a surprise,” he signs. Out of the corner of his eye, he can see Castiel and Jack’s names carved into the table and feels a pang of loss. Eileen walks up to the dog.

“Really?”

“I thought he hated them. They have bad history.” History is perhaps an understatement, but Dean’s trauma from Hell is not his to tell. He reaches down to pet the dog behind the ears and they bark happily.  The dog makes a pitiful noise when Sam stops petting them to sign to Eileen. “I’m going to see where he went.”

Eileen nods, bending down to spoil their new furry friend. Sam heads down the hallway towards Dean’s room. When he doesn’t find him there, somehow, he knows where to look. Dean told him where it happened. Past the bookshelves and the door with Cas’ blood on it is Dean, staring at the wall. His palm is against it, head bowed. 

“Dean?” Sam says, voice soft, trying not to startle. Dean keeps his pose for a second then turns around to take in Sam, a fake smile falling across his face. Sam knows it well: it’s too large, too tight at the edges, and it doesn’t reach Dean’s eyes. It’s the kind of smile they put on to talk to civilians on cases, the one to disarm and encourage the feeling that “everything’s alright.” 

Sam has always hated seeing it directed at him. It’s a clue that translates to “something Dean doesn’t think Sam can fix.”

“Sorry, just taking a minute,” Dean says. He walks past Sam before Sam can say another word. “Do you know if Eileen is hungry? I think it’s time for dinner.”

Sam watches him go then turns back to the wall. He knows the significance of this room without being told, just from the sigil on the door and the upturned books. This was where Castiel died. Where the Empty took him. 

“What the hell happened here?” Sam asks the empty space. He doesn’t get a reply but it’s not like he expected one. He knows Cas can’t hear him, but just in case, he closes his eyes and directs the question as a prayer, though the wording is slightly different.

“Cas, what the hell happened to you?”

***

[A photo is attached of a large white dog with floppy ears, lying on a bed next to a sleeping Dean. Both dog and man are drooling, the latter onto his pillow, the former onto Dean’s shirt. A dog bed rests in the corner of the room, unused.]

So Dean has a dog now. Her name is Miracle. She’s been here for two days and she already runs the place. Dean even let her have some of his bacon. I checked to make sure he wasn’t possessed just in case. He didn’t think it was funny.

I was shocked Dean wanted to keep her. You know how he is with dogs. But he insisted. And I guess it’s working out because well...you can see the picture.

Might start calling myself Uncle Sam to get on his nerves. I’ll report back on how that goes should I survive. 

I’m looking into a book Jack told me to start at. There’s a spell in it, one to summon someone who might be able to help us help you. Don’t worry, no deal making required. 

Hope to see you soon.

***

Dean is the one to tell Claire. Sam offers to do it for him, but Dean blows him off, gets in the Impala and drives down to deliver the news in person. He refuses to let Sam come with.

“This isn’t shit you should hear over a phone,” Dean says. “It’s my fault he’s gone. I should at least tell her myself.”

Sam is on edge the entire time he’s gone. When Dean comes back, he looks like absolute crap, and when he falls back in a chair, Miracle is quick to run to his side and place her head in his lap. Sam watches Dean pet her half heartedly behind the ears.

“That bad, huh,” Sam says. Dean reaches to pet Miracle under her chin.

“Kid lost enough. Don’t blame her for lashing out at the dude who cost her more.”

“Dean it’s not your-”

Dean looks up at him and his expression is stone. Sam’s words die on his lips. He knows better than to try to talk to Dean when he’s like this. Not unless he wants it to go badly. 

This is another clue, he thinks. Dean blames himself for whatever happened and not just in his general “the world is my fault” way. Dean confirms it himself the next second he speaks. 

“You don’t know what happened. And it is. Trust me Sam, it is.” He stands up and pats the dog on her head. “And it will be until we get him back. So any leads?”

Sam takes the distraction, but he makes a mental note not to let the conversation go. For now.

***

[Text is from a number belonging to contact “Claire Novak, FBI Cell”]

Fuck you for leaving me too.

***

Went to clean up your room a bit so it doesn’t get too dusty. Found it already in good shape. I think Dean has been keeping the cobwebs away. He really misses you, you know? He’s taking this...hard. I’m worried. I’m always worried but you know what I mean. 

Also, I saw your collection of IDs. Agent Lizzo? Really? Did anyone buy that? 

When you get back, we should make you some ones with some artists who aren’t as conspicuous as a lie. I’m shocked you didn’t get busted. 

The ingredients for this summoning spell are kind of nuts, and they’re going to take time to gather. I’m using Rowena’s stash to make up most of it, but the real problem is making a lyre out of some petrified wood.  We have to steal some from a National Forest Preserve. It’s an easy heist, but it’s kinda weird to be trying to con just some Park Rangers.

Also, do angels know how to play a lyre or is that just a stereotype? I’ve been up for over twenty seven hours reading this thing and I have to know. Tell me when you get back.

Also, what do you know about Orpheus? 

[sharkfish]

ps i loved this one

(rereading bookmarks edition)

i’ve been rereading stories from my bookmarks as a comfort thing. i’m getting real deep in there to stuff i haven’t (re)read for years, and damn do i have good taste. the ones i’ve read recently that you should, too: 

(under the cut so i’m not that asshole that makes you scroll past an endless post) 

A Change of Scene by SurlyCat

When Dean goes over to see his Dom on Christmas Eve, he isn't expecting Cas to play naughty Santa, and neither of them is expecting how it turns out for them.

ooooomg fuck me up with that sex to lovers thing featuring bdsm. yessssss 

A Room of His Own (or not) by Valinde (Valyria)

Dean took a deep breath and reassessed the situation. He was in bed with a guy, sure, and technically they were snuggling, but it was Cas. The guy had absolutely no reference on what was appropriate physical contact between two dudes sharing a bed in the... normal, completely unsexy, no-funny-business, way.

cas is fallen, dean is confused (what else is new), A+ cuddling. that’s the fic. 

Boys On Film by LoversAntiquities @tragidean​ 

But maybe that’s what it is—maybe Castiel’s finally realized something Dean is too chicken to admit, despite the fact he’s been jerking off to the idea of Castiel fucking him for the past few weeks. The idea warms him as much as it pains him to think about, his friend not being able to talk to him about something like that. That has to be it—it’s the only explanation. Castiel likes him.

“Or maybe he knows you do cam shows.”

Dean chokes on his burger.

idk what to say, i love a good sex worker fic and here you go. @tragidean​ is always here with that first-class content. 

Castiel's Angel by Valinde (Valyria) @valinde​

The angel took a deep breath and looked down at his hands. He was fidgeting Cas noticed. Usually he was so bizarrely at ease in his human form, lounging around and tossing winks and smirks at anyone with a pulse. That more than anything had Cas straightening on his stool and wishing he was a little less tipsy.

“Ineedyoutogroommywings,” Dean muttered in one long, almost unintelligible, string. He was blushing.

all my fellow wing hos should flock* to this fic. i also love me a good switcharoo with angel dean (and hunter cas, as this is an alternate canon universe). and dean gets all claim-y, which is also my jam. 

*this was unintentional but a pretty funny joke 

For Science! by pm_lo 

Selected transcripts and supporting materials from Dr. Castiel Williams and Dean Winchester’s seminal study on physiological and psychological sexual response by gender designation.

i believe this was the first abo fic i added to my bookmarks. story time: many, many moons ago, i kept track of my reading list. i was doing that “50 books a year” thing so it was mostly for tracking that, but i had another tab for fics, because i read few enough that i could track them. i rated things and sometimes left notes, and by all the abo ones i was like “don’t tell anyone i read this.” yes, i shamed myself for liking abo. it was a dark time in my life.

anyway, then i read this, and was like, all right i can see what’s going on here.

this is a great fic for multiple reasons, and the format is one. it’s written as dialogue-only transcripts from their experiment. it’s hard to make that kind of format work, but pm_lo ain’t fucking around. 

Just a Stranger On the Bus by Amelia_Clark 

December 31 9:32 PM When Castiel boards the bus in KC, they think it’s empty at first—but when they toss their backpack onto an aisle seat and climb in after it, there’s a muffled yelp from the dimness at the back of the bus. They turn in time to see a man in a faded Carharrt jacket, sitting up and yawning as he rubs sleep out of his eyes. The man’s hair is greasy and matted down on one side, and there’s drool on the side of his face; nonetheless, he’s ridiculously good-looking.

“Hey man,” he says. Castiel does not correct him. “This can’t be Chicago.”

the non-binary tag, just like the trans tags in general, are a house half-built and left to rot in the rain. even if that wasn’t true, this series is goddamn amazing. also there’s rimming. also there’s a line in there that said something like “they don’t dislike their body, it just never felt like theirs” and i had a lightbulb moment irt my own experience. did dean ever wear carharrt in the actual series? if not, mistakes have been made. 

Just Turn Around and Go by PorcupineGirl @porcupine-girl​

Dean should be happy. His best friend and housemate of five years, Castiel, is moving out to live with his boyfriend, Balthazar. Dean's career is going great, so he can easily afford the house on his own now. This is just growing up, moving forward to the next phase of their lives.

It would be awesome, if he weren't in love with Cas.

Well, here we go, he thinks as he opens the refrigerator and digs around for sandwich supplies. First day of the rest of your life. Time to move the fuck on. As he slams his meat and mayo and pickles down on the counter, he considers adding the bottle of whiskey he knows is hiding in the cabinet, but decides that he has enough self-respect to wait 'til five. Then he'll get fucking blackout drunk. Yep. Awesome.

y’all, do i even have to say anything about this? roommates to friends to a pathetic amount of pining without saying shit to disgustingly in love. also i think i cried, but i��ve been in tears so many times in the last week, who’s to say. 

Plus One by ceeainthereforthat @ceeainthereforthat​ 

Castiel Novak might have to attend three weddings in two months, but he’s not about to let his brother play matchmaker. His family’s Internet streaming company is too important to let a relationship steal his time, but he knows exactly what to do–hire someone to pretend to be his boyfriend.

Dean Winchester has worked five-star hospitality long enough to know how to fit in with Castiel’s crowd, and this job could score him the connections to make his acting career take off. It’s a business deal, no matter how they’re drawn to each other. When the lines of their contract start to blur into real feelings, can they withstand Castiel’s family and jealous fans working to split them up?

there are a lot of great fake dating stories out there, but this one takes the cake (or, at least, a slice of it). also, i cried a lot rereading this, both “ohhh god i love their love” tears and also “ohhhh god this hurts so bad” tears. 

Should've Just Asked by Annie D (scaramouche) 

Despite their age gap and differing social circles, Castiel has struck up a warm friendship with Mary Winchester, a wealthy widowed socialite. When Castiel needs a place to stay, Mary invites him into her house, where there’s loads of spare room. Castiel’s aware that they make an odd pair, but he doesn’t fully realize how things look to outsiders, especially to Mary’s eldest son. All Dean Winchester sees is that his mom has apparently hooked up with a hot young guy (who is totally Dean’s type) and that makes things… weird.

they’re both oblivious idiots in love, cas is grey-ace, dean’s a total dork, it’s all just very lovely (and frustrating in the way oblivious idiots can be!!!). 

PS - annie d is writing marvel fic lately and i’m sure it’s fantastic if you’re into that kind of thing. 

Support Your Local Gay Beekeeper by Powerfulweak

It’s not like Dean goes on Grindr very often, just when he’s bored and alone. The blue-eyed guy's profile reads "Beekeeper, 29, 5'10, Single, I watch the bees." Dean is intrigued. He has to send a message.

this is a series that starts with some great phone sex and then goes on to very, very awkward sex injuries. a goddamn cringefest that had me in complete horror imagining it. but it’s fun! they persevere! people so rarely write about Sex Going Wrong and i love @powerfulweak​ for taking the bullet for us on that one. 

Take Me Home Tonight by Persephoneshadow @persephoneshadow​

“Come on, we’re finding you someone to…engage with sexually or whatever,” Dean explains, chancing another swig of beer before going on. “Anyone in this bar, no limits, who would you would be your top choice to bang?” “Well, you, ideally.” Dean spits out some beer before collapsing in on himself, legitimately choking this time. “Excuse me?!” ---- Or the one where Cas wants to have sex and Dean is there to help.

your classic denialist “i’ll be your wingman” turning to “actually imagining someone else touching you makes me want to punch someone.” which is dumb, because cas actually wanted dean all along. 

Words with Friends by betts

"Dean Winchester is as straight as an arrow. He’s a lady’s man of epic proportions: the king of the one night stand, the messiah of the friends with benefits paradigm, the emperor of perpetual bachelorhood.

Except, apparently, when it comes to his best friend, Castiel Novak."

***

Wherein a longstanding acquaintanceship leads to friendship, then best friendship, then sexting, then dirty talk, then mutual masturbation, then, inevitably, fucking.

look i think you’re always in good hands with @bettsfic​. but this one has some good sexting and phone sex right at the start, which i’m totally into, and then it gets even better. cas is a lil bossy, by which i meant to say he’s the kind of bdsm geek who has equipment installed in his bedroom for sex purposes. 

You're The Only Stranger I Need by lyndsie_l

When Castiel receives a text from a stranger, he finds himself engaging in conversations daily. He's drawn to the outgoing college student and longs to interact with the other man as often as he can. Slowly, he finds himself falling in love with the other and can't imagine ever meeting a more beautiful person.

The only problem?

He's never actually met this other man.

be still my heart! a long distance/texting/phone sex thing! i want to read it again right this second. cas is such a cool nerd, dean is a brat, it’s a good time all around. 

if you enjoy these fics (and you should), please give the writer some love via kudos and/or comments. <3 

ps - as always, if i didn’t tag the writer and you know their tumblr, please tag in the comments. i don’t think there’s a writer alive who wouldn’t be happy to be on a rec list. :) 

[nemuri-no-kid]

It's me, the fic request anon... I hope this doesn't sound rude, but are you going to answer it? It's completely fine if you don't!! I'm just super curious and I keep checking your profile but it never shows!! :) (Sorry I'm being pushy it's been a few weeks now...)

Wait, who’s rude here again? It’s rather me who’s seemingly ignored you. But it wasn’t like that, I swear! But I guess you’d prefer to see an actual answer (finally) instead of excuses, so here you go! (You have some incredible timing though, like I’d post it today anyway - the joy of having cold) I apparently can’t make a simple list and it got ridiculously long, so I’m putting it under Read more. Does tagging people even work under Read more btw? If not then well, I suppose I failed a bit. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Anyway. You’re probably already aware of this, but I feel I should point out that Kaito is my dearest boy, and therefore pretty much everything what I’m going to mention here is more or less about him. Contrary to appearances it won’t be only KaiShin, but I admit there’s a lot of that. Also, you won’t find here too many long stories, as I rarely read fics with more than 50k words unless I’d started them before they got so long. I mean, I do have quite a few saved and waiting to be read and I’m sure they’re all amazing, but at the end of the day I usually prefer sleeping than night-reading and yeah. Ok, let’s start:

So, did someone say KaiShin? Because you know, Shinichi is my second dearest boy, and when both of my boys are happy together it’s just the best thing. One of first writers who shown and are keep showing me the joy of reading about these two is @rachello344. Many of Rachel’s fics are only prompts, so they are pretty short and that’s a real shame, but they’re still worth reading! I think my favourite stories are these two and honestly I could read them over and over again - asexual Kaito is good, the fake-but-not-really marriage of these two dorks was the best thing and please write more self-indulgent stuff

@lunarscaped (Luna Darkside)’s oneshots steadily get longer and longer but I definitely don’t mind~ Some of the most memorable to me are Penumbra (a.k.a. only Shinichi could write a romance by accident), Darling, So It Goes (undercover mission and more of oblivious Shinichi) and Ease (just. asfadsfgdga) but really, they’re all good

House of Cards is a beautiful story of Kaito taking care of Shin-chan the Dove written by V. Shalyr (how Ai managed to make that pill will forever remain a mystery though); my other faves are With Each Season (it’s beautifull too), Paper Trail (funny short piece in which Kaito is too good at being bad, somebody stop him), Countdown to Forever (good old taking BO down together) and On Wings of White (aww, these two)

Alaena F. Dragonstar’s Win Some, Lose Some and Shadow of a Smile followed by Echo of a Laugh are all good examples of A+ writing. Boys, it will be fine, you have each other. Check the profile for more good stuff~

All ToukoTai’s fics are good, but Life In Technicolor is good, and then there is this Flower shop AU KaiShin Give A Little which includes Shinichi convincing Kaito to become Kid, and if isn’t that ironic

This Little Thing I Have by teawithmochi is a really nice piece - Conan overthinks his situation, but what are annoying phantom thieves for?

solomonara’s Getting Off Track - did I say something about overthinking? This is real overthinking, boys, come on

Almost Magical by ObsidianAbyss got me by this one scene in the class - Shinichi, if you’re trying to deny you and Kid have a thing, you’re doing it wrong

I love the dialogues in dokidokidk’s The Guy Next Door, they will never be not funny for me, plus it’s a nice idea of AU

Good Soulmate AU KaiShin is not bad, and aceoftwos’s Apple Blossoms is good. Also there are locard’s exchange principle series for even more of these two

Beautiful Carvings written by RavenShira is another really nice Soulmate AU. Misunderstandings are strong in this one - lesson: multiple identities don’t help in finding your soulmate

No Ghosts Need Apply by Cursed Detective is a really nice supernatural story, and Shinichi and Kaito are always a big plus for me, obviously. Kaito is sort of dead - the title may suggest as much - but such trivial detail won’t stop him, haha. And then there is a really nice (Not) Supernatural story. It’s ongoing, Shinichi is not a vampire and honestly, I love this and I need more

purple_mangosteen’s Clair de Lune series mean more KaiShin goodness, and also I’m a sucker for Conan and Kid texting each other

joisbishmyoga - I loved Rolling Snake Eyes for a good application of Kidnichi. Will Conan ever stop being so reckless though? I don’t think so. Pluralverse is about minds of three teenage detectives somehow ending up in Kid’s head, and it’s tight in there. It’s interesting, it’s good, read it. Twist the Knife is really intense and the writing is amazing, but it may not be to everyone’s taste, as rape and trauma happen and well

@kawaiibeyotch (kaitothegreat) writes mainly AoKai fics and they’re wonderful, I simply adore Aoko in these. Some nice examples are Live Life in full Bloom and Hello Incognito - these two are good AUs and have I already mentioned Aoko? There are also few HeiKazu stories which I’ve yet to read but I’m sure they’re worth trying, too

Slip and Fall, Obligation, Pride Goeth Before, Philanthropy, Heavy Silences, Never Here, Never Far and Shades of Grey by blinkblink form sort of a series and I wouldn’t make a better summary to any of them than the author, but it’s Kid and the Kid task force dealing with some actual dangers and criminals, there is action and mystery, and it’s really good written and you totally should read it

Nerves of Steel by Ellen Brand is another must read - Robo-Kaito makes a comeback and things get serious

A Perfect Act, No Little Plans, Both Dark and Deep and Forgiveness and Reunion by Candyland - a set starting from sort of cornering Kid by the police and presenting him an offer he couldn’t refuse followed by good action

@backtodc‘s piece about the Kid task force being actually competent when it comes to other crimes is both funny and brilliant, try it

The Cranes by Acier Glace is just so sweet? No pairings here, it’s just Kid making lots of paper cranes to make you believe in magic and did I say it’s sweet? Because it is

miladyFeather wrote the ridiculous The Adventures of Kudou Shinichi, Fast Food Worker which is ridiculous and I have no regrets sharing this one, even if it’s ridiculous

Now a surprise, as Love-Love Daisakusen by neonquincy1217 is Makoko/Sonoko! Where’s the catch? Well, remember Doito Katsuki? *wink*

When I think of quality SaguKai, I think of @5160763 (OrphanText). There is good KaiShin, too, but both examples I’m putting here happen to be SaguKai, so. Anyway. The way Kaito and Saguru are written, I simply love it. And How we begin is so good? Also, In the language of the birds. I read it while it was being put on Tumblr in small fragments and boy, every new fragment was making me so happy

The Hattori-Kudo Files is a set of few cases solved by Heiji and Conan (who could’ve thought that?), written by MeridianGrimm - I believe the last one isn’t finished, but the others are really interesting! And then there are some nice SaguShin and SaguKai fics, too~

I picked five of Mikauzoran’s fics for different reasons but again, I recommend trying all others as well: The Fifth Detective (Kaito’s reasoning is funny and brilliant, he needs a hug though), The Pit: A Romance and Quietly Starving (SaguKai, these dorks), Healing Heartbreak for the Holidays (SaguKaiShin? That’s even more dorks), and Coming to Terms (KaiRan - usually I prefer it platonic but this one really got me, also interactions with Conan? It was a pleasure to read)

Dressed to Impress by Lisa Telramor is a really nicely written SaguKai oneshot, for all your SaguKai needs

Addy01’s When the travel bug bites is a sweet story about Shinichi travelling the world to find his way in life again and befriending some magician thieves along the way. You made me reread it and I don’t regret anything

In case of Operation: Gift Wrap by Boogum I’ll just copy the author’s summary as it’s explanatory enough: ‘Sera Masumi was used to being mistaken for a boy. She was not used to being mistaken for Kaitou Kid.’

Critique written by Eliryn is a short but really nice piece. “Looks just like the real thing, doesn’t it?”

AngelicSentinel’s the suffering of fools was already amazing as a oneshot, so when more chapters appeared one day I was overjoyed. It’s KaiShin and it’s good. Also, the author is one of the only two (look below) which I trust enough to blindly read their ShinRan fics. Like, I have nothing against ShinRan, and I kind of ship it while being in Canon Mode, but I don’t go and read fics about them at all, so this is quite an achievement. Read their other pieces, too, they’re really worth reading!

Cost of Freedom by @mintchocolateleaves? OMG, Cost of Freedom. Read Cost of Freedom. I love both the plot and the characterizations, it’s amazing, read it. It’s ongoing and you’ll suffer because of that, but read it. And while suffering, try other ongoing fics: The Innocence Game, Law Unto Themselves and various oneshots. Like, I can blindly recommend each and every fic Mint wrote, even ShinRan. Cost of Freedom though

Next, Taliya - I recommend all present and future fics. My faves are Without Fanfare (my heart though), Search and Recovery and Recompense (the kind of Kidnichi enactment I approve and aftermath), A Word of Caution (Ai and Kaito as the main characters? Yes, please) and TMPD Antics (it’s simply hilarious)

lucathia’s 4-6-4-9 is a oneshot about Conan getting disturbing encrypted message and trying to find the sender. Oh, and there was some murder, too

A Snowy Meeting (followed by ongoing Hidden Friendship) by angelwingsonline puts Kaito in DC movies, starting from Quarter of Silence, and lets him befriend and exchange messages with Conan. I love this concept

Ichthyophobia’s Mirror Mirror and Two-faced, Half-faced are really funny - the former has really nice interactions between Shinichi, Kaito and the bad guy, while the latter… Let’s say that Kid fixing Subaru’s face is my aesthetic. And then there is Shaking Hands about Kaito not being really able to do magic anymore but getting help and somehow overcoming it and it’s beautiful. And again, check other fics too~

I liked the idea of Shinichi with grapheme synesthesia working in forensics in Number the Stars by The Sand Assassin. Then there are sweet KaiShin fics: Kaitou the Snowman (Akako, stop) and Dakimakura (it’s just a shirt Conan, you’re making Kid sad)

Yannami’s A Criminal’s Fiasco is a good example of why taking Kaito hostage is a bad idea. Poor criminals

@kkrazy256 (kakashikrazy256) likes making Kaito suffer. A lot. In all possible ways. And I really mean that. If that’s your thing, then check it out. And if it is not, there are the mild ones I like coming back to: Early Snow (this was literally my first fic in this fandom, I’m sentimental ok - also Shinichi and Kaito, come on), Mr Barista (Mystery Train aftermath starring Bourbon and Kid) and Sympathy From the Devil (or how could OVA 10 end if the bad guys weren’t so dramatically bad at being bad). As for the rest, you were warned, haha

In Elirius’s Put on a Smile and Take me Apart Kaito definitely doesn’t cope well with his situation. Somebody help him *sobs*

Hostage situation and platonic KidRan anyone? In that case, Irreplaceable by LostInTheDreams is the thing you need. As for other stories, I can only vouch for these with Kaito, but my boy is suffering a lot. Again

Unfair by Frozen-Infinity, but only if you want your heart to break, my boy is dying and this is unfair

StoryWriter369’s Broken Record makes my heart ache every time because immortal Kaito is not what should ever happen, but I’m doing this to myself from time to time anyway *sobs more*

Hebiaczek’s The fox and hounds is an ongoing story and to be honest I’m not up to date, but what I’ve read was a really amazing writing, and exactly the kind of plot I like the best. Because. The plot.

I loved Externalities by 873.25 and I hope Internalities will be continued. Characters are written so well, and both concepts are really intriguing. Try it and you won’t regret it

And last but definitely not least: kittebasu’s A Study in Scarlette - it’s a must-read. There is a good plot, there is Kaishin and it’s truly amazing, and did I say something at the beginning about not reading long fics? So this one is very long and I still read it, so it really does say somehing

I 100% missed at least few people and I’m totally going to regret it later, but let’s say I’m finished. See you in few weeks Anon, haha