#the comic pages are more dynamic to me but im also afraid they get a little crowded but that the one panels look a little bare

[invasionaugems]

Just a little heads-up! The next part of the update will be back to the one picture per panel format! Please let me know which one you prefer so i know more which one to lean into in the future updates and posts! Thank you! :]

[jemmo]

the confession.

i cant remember around what ep it was that there was a lot of discourse going around about a big, blatant confession, and whether it was gonna happen, and what it was gonna be like and who was gonna confess ‘properly’ first. which is why i find it kinda funny that, after all that discussion, when i watched this scene i didn’t see it as the confession, i saw it as a confession. they have confessed time before but here is where the confession is said in its plain and simplest terms. so lets talk about it. 

after ep 5 i wrote this post about the theme of courage through the fight and rooftop scenes. so when during the big confession pran kept using the phrasing ‘be brave’ a lightbulb went off in my head. bc this scene to me is like a gift. its pran giving pat the gift of a voice, of volume, of publicity. its pran giving pat everything he couldn’t give him in that fight, the chance to say what they are. 

and what’s clear to me is that their understanding of each other has grown from that fight, bc the fundamental difference between the fight and this confession is that they’re on the same page, they both understand what the other wants and what they can give. before, pat’s courage was at odds with pran’s fear, but we’ve come so far from there. pran’s walls have slowly but surely been knocked down and in this moment, there are none left, nothing is keeping pat out any longer. and now, unlike in the fight, pran is the one asking pat to be courageous. pran’s asking pat to make their relationship known to the world. 

it might not be pran directly asking for these words, but this whole thing is staged and arranged. and pran isn’t blindsided by this, it isn’t his faculty and friends dragging both of them into this. this is something pran put in place, got his whole faculty involved, his friends and his seniors. he’s set the script in place, he wrote the words. and there’s something so perfect about the fact that when we hear these words, we aren’t looking at the guy saying them, we’re looking at pran’s face. bc pran has always been silent. he said it in ep 8, just because im not shouting from the rooftops, doesn’t mean i don’t like you. and this is both exemplified and also counteracted here. bc he is not the one doing the screaming. he’s not the one asking or replying, he is a silent party at this point, watching it all play out. and yet, the fact he organised this whole thing is him screaming from the rooftops. he’s the one that made this so, and that fact is an act of love, a statement that doesn’t need words. he’s always communicated through actions and this is no different. 

‘do you dare?’. the fact that this is said and we see such a comical face on pran says it all. bc its a joke, honestly. we all know that pat would dare. he has always been daring. he is daring in his love of pran and daring in his public display of his feelings constantly. all along he has been the one with the courage. and this is a perfect reversal of the dynamic of the fight. bc before, pat asked for courage from pran he didn’t have. but now, pran asks for courage from pat that he knows he has. there is no point to the question, its obvious, pat has always had courage to devote himself to pat. 

for the whole scene, its kinda ironic to hear these lines coming from pran. the fact that one of the first things he says is akin to ‘are you scared pat?’ is just... it makes no sense. no. pat’s not scared, he’s never been scared. pran has always been the scared one. he’s the one that ran away time after time and hid his feelings. he’s the one that was too afraid to get close. but precisely the fact he’s saying these things show how far he’s come. bc now he’s the one on top, he is the one in control. i don’t think they elevated pran on these stairs like this just to give the whole juliet’s balcony affect. i think its also to show that finally pran feels powerful. he’s gotten to a place where he is so much more sure in himself that he’s the one questioning pat, he’s the one doubting pat’s courage, not the other way around. he has chickened out many times. he chickened out of telling pat how he feels, he chickened out after the kiss, he constantly chickened out of confessing during the bet. but he’s done running scared now. he’s here saying i’m not scared anymore, are you? 

also, i’m adding this in after the fact, but while writing this i saw this gifset on my dash about the small ways pran has tried to reach out before and it was like a divine coincidence that i saw it bc look at where he is now. he’s gone from being that terrified to ask the smallest question or do the simplest thing to not confessing his love, but asking pat to confess his love. that to me is beyond him becoming strong enough to confess himself. bc the thing is he’s always been sure in his feelings, he’s had them and known about them and carried them since high school and they haven’t changed. what was the hardest for him was destroying all the lies and excuses he built in his head so that he could let himself accept the fact that pat liked him too. its more than letting himself believe, its him seeing it as a reality, an indisputable fact. and this scene shows that he’s made it. he doesn’t just accept pat’s feelings but actively asks for them, demands for pat to make them known. he’d never once, despite all the flirtatious behaviour, ever demanded pat to feel anything for him, he’d never thought of himself as that lucky or deserving. but here he is, taking pat’s love and owning it, admitting to himself that he’s worthy of it, that its real and its all for him.  

‘be brave’. he just outright asks pat to be brave for him. and i said before that this whole staged confession is like a gift to pat, bc its what he’s always wanted, for the entire world to know he belongs to pat. that he will be brave for him. and he’s been brave countless times. he was brave enough to admit his feelings first, brave enough to pursue pran when he ran away even if it meant walking into the lions den, brave enough to lose the bet and confess first. he is brave enough to love pran in the first place despite their friends and families being at each other’s throats. and thats important bc i think some of the courage pran shows here is bc his friends know about his relationship and are ok with it now. his courage doesn’t come from inside, its built up piece by piece by pat’s love and his friends acceptance. his fear is lessened bc his friends ultimately ended up supporting him and going against what he was afraid of happening, even tho it started out like that. pat tho, his bravery is innate. the whole world could be against him and he’d still be brave. and while so much of this scene opposes what happened in the fight scene, this dynamic is a perfect mirror of what happens on the rooftop, pran asking pat to be brave for him. up there, he asks him to be brave and take the first step, be the one to admit first that they’re more than friends, and he does. here, he says the words. pran, the man who has always communicated through actions, is actually saying what he means out loud. he says it with bravado and an air that this isn’t all too serious, but that’s another safety net. it’s something that’ll catch him if pat isn’t brave, bc he can pass it off as a joke. its much like the bet where he could pass off his overt flirtatious actions as plays in a game. but both then and now, we know he is being deadly serious. we know he does want pat to be brave for him, and pat would never disappoint on that front. 

and finally, finally, pat gets to say the words. the simple three words he’s always wanted to say. and i could wax poetic forever about pat being a man who sees the world so simply despite the complex nature of everything that keeps him down. but for simple pat, those clear and simple words must feel like such release. a statement he’s known is true for so long, and now, after being begged by pran and forced by the world to stay silent for so long, pran is letting him say it. no need to be silent, no need to lie, no need to call it what it isn’t. no friends, no enemies, just ‘i like you’. bc unlike pran, pat is a man of words. he communicates through words. yes, he may show his love through constant acts of service, but unlike pran who communicates through actions, pat communicates through words. he talks, he wants to talk, he needs to talk, needs to say it as it is. thats what ep 6 is all about, pat’s need for simple and clear communication. and so here, pran speaks to him on his level. this is pran coming to him, where he’s always gone to pran before. pran is using the plain and simple words so pat can too. i talked before about how, despite loving pat for so long, he’s never really known how to care for him, bc he wouldn’t let himself. it was always one sided so he didn’t need to take pat’s feelings into consideration, bc if he did, he might find more there than he can deal with. so now they’re finally together, he’s learning how to care about pat. and again, this scene shows how pran has grown in that aspect too. he’s reaching out to pat in a language he understands and inviting him do what he wants, let him be himself. and after living under pran’s rules and sacrificing himself for pran before, this switch speaks louder of pran’s love for pat than any words ever could. 

and here pran is encouraging him. say it again, say it louder, scream it from the rooftops and to everyone that will listen. for every time he’s brushed off pat’s touch in public, every time they’ve ran away to hide from someone, every time he’s told pat to stop when he was saying too much, crossing too far over the line, making it too obvious, he’s now letting pat be as loud as he wants. no more caring about the risks, no more stifling that loud and brash part of pat that makes him pat, makes pran love it. he can be his full in love and loveable self on display. they can play and goad and keep that same dynamic that’s always carried through their relationship, competition, and use it here too. pran can tease him, say ‘you think thats good enough? for me?’ bc he now knows what he deserves and what pat wants to give him and its right in front of him just ready to burst forth from this man. the loudest and proudest confession of love. and man does pat deliver. 

he claims love for pran and only pran. shouts it, screams it, let it burst out from the very core of him. and its the light in his eyes, the shine the gleam. the pure joy of being able to confess his love for all to see. its such a simple joy pat never thought he’d get but its happening right now. we all know that feeling of being in a moment you’ve always wished for but never thought would happen. when you’re in that moment and realise its happening, you’ve got everything you ever wanted, you can do the thing, it bring you such pure and unmatchable joy and i cant express it in words that’ll do that feeling justice. its euphoric. and for pran to see that, see the absolute high pat gets from loving him, that’s better from the words themselves. being shown that loving pran makes pat so happy, thats a feeling that cant be matched. bc he isnt loving pran just for pran, he’s loving pran for himself too, and as someone that loves and cares for pat, pran seeing him do this for himself is just as good as knowing just how loved he is. 

and for pran, think back to ep 6 and his big bravado claim. ‘i’ll make you get down on your knees declaring your love for me’. bc ofc pran would never make an empty claim. ofc he said that with the full intention of it happening. and dont think for one second, as well as all the mushy emotional stuff, this isn’t also pran fulfilling that exact promise. in a way, its him proving he won the bet and pat’s ‘punishment’ for losing. bc he said it himself, when pran was losing he said i’ll make you claim it in front of the whole class. and now his words are being turned on him, he’s the one confessing in front of everyone. it just so happens this is exactly what he always wanted. 

and i really love this line ‘can you hear that?’ bc all this time pat has been trying to find the right words, do the right thing that’ll make pran hear him. he cares for him, defies the world for him, kisses him, chases him, tells him he’d always lose for him, smells him, understands him, sleeps with him, cooks for him, will fight for him and get on his hands and knees for him. what is the thing that’ll make pran understand the size and extent and the power and the overwhelming nature of his love for him? and the thing is, its all of those things, they all add up, they all build, every single thing every single day is proof and reaffirmation of his love. and in this moment, its the plain and simple words. its his language. can pran hear that? he can now. bc what was holding pran back wasn’t pat not saying it right or doing it right, it was pran’s desperate need not to hear it. now he stands, defences defeated, ears open, hearing, understanding, and accepting. this is real. pat loves him and it’s all he’s ever wanted and more. they have it, its here, its now, its strong, its powerful and it’s loud and out for the world to see. 

it’s yes. he hears, he understands, he accepts. it’s a yes to everything. it’s yes you love me and a yes i love you too. and going back to what this whole thing started out as, think back to the rooftop scene. what’s the word that broke through then? no. it was pat saying no, refuting friendship, refuting enemies. it was saying what they weren’t bc they still didn’t know what they were. now its pran saying yes. its pran saying yes to boyfriends, yes to love. its pran saying everything they are bc they are no longer shaped by what they’re not but what they are. it’s not ‘just’ anything or ‘not’ anything. there’s no need for a prefix, no need for excuses or conditions. it’s just what they are. two people, in love, and the whole world knows it.  

[9worldstales]

Loki & Thor in “Thor & Loki – Double Trouble” n° 2

I really, really, really wanted to read this one from when it was announced so here are my two cents on the new number.

BEWARE FOR SPOILERS?

So, “Double trouble” continues on the same line on which it’s started. It’s fun and cute and it’s based on having a funny situation after another, in total contrast with “Thor” of this month.

Anyway, where were we?

We’ve left Thor and Loki having to deal with Mildred, the sister of the Midgard serpent, which is really not happy at having been summoned.

The story starts… showing us two panels. In one we can see Thor’s eyes, in the other Loki’s.

Although they’re physically different, the fact they’re shown in the same way, remarks a similarity. It’ll be something recurring in this episode.

Thor is conveniently saying it’s all Loki’s fault.

Now... I won’t deny Loki has a HUGE share of the blame, but Thor knew they shouldn’t take the lur, knew it could be dangerous, and that giving it to his brother was a bad idea and yet did it anyway over a dare. He was a willing accomplice and, while he couldn’t figure out the full extent of what this would have caused, he could have avoided the whole thing by saying ‘no, I’m not retrieving the lur’. He didn’t, afraid he would look a coward so yes, he’s also to blame.

Loki, who’s still being held there by Thor, points out whoever is the fault (and he remarks he’s not conceding anything), this doesn’t matter as they’re both doomed.

He seems relatively calm and rational (really, Loki, shouldn’t you worry a little?) and I really wonder why he wanted to play that lur so badly, he recognized Mildred so maybe he knew what playing it would cause, beyond causing mischief.

I mean, to use a way to say from my country which is particularly fitting here, was the play worth the candle?

Mildred attacks, parting them and sending them both flying.

Thor says he guess it’s up to the more HEROIC brother to make short work of this mess as he tried to use his hammer against Mildred.

Indeed, the siblings have a poor relation, as this is also a jab implying Loki is ‘less heroic’ (coward), as well as a demonstration of Thor’s big ego. Loki doesn’t seem offended though as he pats dust away from his clothes and smiles as he agrees and look at his brother.

There’s to wonder why Thor kept him there if he thought he could solve it on his own, did he want to show off?

Mjolnir hits Mildred. Thor seems proud of this but Loki is much faster to understand this only angered her more.

As the siblings hurriedly and not so heroically run away (in an hilarious way... I mean, look at them!), chased by a furious Mildred, Thor tells Loki to be the one to think of something.

Loki’s plan… is to have a bouquet of roses magically appear and then to try to swoon Mildred over.

Honestly it’s hilarious (he even has a shine effect around) and, considering the cover, one might even think it would work (it doesn’t as Mildred uses her tongue to toss him away) but it’s not really particularly clever or make special use of magic, which should be Loki’s two strongest points.

Still it’s interesting how he tries to deal with her pacifically, not fighting but trying to ‘make friends’.

Anyway, as Loki flies away, Thor comments he’s not her type.

Mildred heads for the market, devastating it. It’s probably a good thing this is meant to be a funny thing or there would be a massacre. Instead the market place seems to be empty.

Thor points out they need a new, new plan to which Loki retorts it’s Thor’s turn.

I like the visual of the panel, with Mildred’s body cutting the 4 panels in halves and Loki and Thor alternating between panels, Loki on a side and Thor in the other, well balancing the symmetry of the scene.

Thor spots the lur and makes a run for it, telling Loki to distract Mildred. Loki points out that was what he was trying to do previously but it didn’t work.

So… I take if this was what he was trying to do when he attempted to seduce her, Thor didn’t realize and he didn’t take the hint.

It’s also clear Loki doesn’t look pleased with this plan, yet he still does what his brother says and, after catching Mildred’s attention, since Thor has previously suggested he was rejected because he wasn’t her type, he turns himself in a snake… maybe thinking she might like him more in this form.

She doesn’t.

As Thor grabs the ‘dreaded object of his brother’s schemes’ (which actually belonged to Odin and Thor totally contributed in handing it to Loki) Loki, in his snake form, escapes from Mildred, urging him to act.

Thor explains he believes if a note summoned her, another note might send her back so he bets on him guessing it. I’ll say it would have been better ask Loki first if he had an idea which one it could be as it’s Loki who’s the magician but whatever, Thor has the good luck of being the heroic main character.

Loki, still in snake form, comments it’s a solid plan… (it’s not really, it’s more a risky bet in Loki’s style) and then we see him draped on his brother’s shoulders, which is kind of cute, as he wonders if it did work, wearing the same expression as his brother.

Call me weird but I find adourable Loki crawled on Thor’s shoulders in snake form and Thor isn’t even fazed by it, as if this was perfectly normal for him.

Anyway turns out Thor has summoned an even bigger snake, which Loki recognizes as Mildred’s mom.

Mildred is dragged home by her mother and while Thor and Loki comment on how she’s going to be grounded, a voice calls them, saying their names in 2 different fonts. It’s Odin who wants to know what’s going on.

In the most (im)mature manner the siblings blame each other in a mirroring way, each refusing to act as an adult and take his share of the blame.

Odin though, is distraught over the loss of his favourite ice cream stall (who cares about the rest of the market and possibly of the city being in ruin?) and, as the siblings get another image in which their position mirror each other...

...he condemns them to clean up duty.

Thor is pissed but, as he carries a huge load of ruins, comments maybe this will curb Loki’s craving for mischief. Obviously not, as Loki, who’s carrying just a rock, immediately starts suggesting something. Thor cuts him, insisting he doesn’t want to hear it.

Loki is disappointed, he doesn’t get what Thor’s problem is.

Thor, covering his ears, insists Loki does this to him every! Time!

Loki still doesn’t get the problem, saying he’s just trying to keep the days lively with intriguing solutions to their problems and asks him if he wouldn’t like the cleanup done faster… so Thor can go chase his adouring fans.

Really, I do wonder if Loki does all this not so much for the mischief but because this is the only way he knows to have Thor paying him attention. He really doesn’t seem to get what he’s doing that’s so bad… but he seems to get that Thor would prefer to be elsewhere than with him.

Anyway Loki’s ‘brilliant’ plan is to use his cunning and genius and… some sort of crystal ball he has snatched from Odin’s vault while Thor was escaping from the guards because sacred objects can be useful and it’s better to be prepared. When Thor asks what the ball does Loki claims he’s glad Thor asked… but it turns out he has no idea what it does and discovers it just by testing the ball.

I take back my previous speculation about Loki having better chances than Thor to know which note to play with the lur. It seems Loki’s way to deal with magical objects it’s not to read instructions but to test try it on the nearby object. Really Thor, why would you trust ANYTHING in your brother’s hands?

Well, credits when it’s due, Thor tells him to put it back and, after finding back his hammer that he has somehow left behind, that it will be a bad idea.

I’m not really sure why we had this scene with Thor searching for his hammer. Is it a clue Thor isn’t the ordered type? Is it going to be relevant later on because, let’s say, Thor picked up the wrong hammer or something like that? Or it’s just to fill space? No idea.

Anyway as Loki asks him if he wants to resume clean up duty, Thor gives up.

Loki tells him to then shut up and let the smart brother do some cool magic.

Now… hum… I’m not really sure it’s smart to use some magical artifact Loki doesn’t really know how it works but whatever, we know this is just the prelude for another disaster.

Again they reinforce the previous dynamics, where Thor defined himself the heroic brother, Loki calls himself the smart brother… and even if Thor knows it’s a bad idea, ultimately he plays along because he doesn’t want to do the clean up.

Anyway the panel with Loki holding the ball is quite awesome, there’s the focus on the shining ball, Loki on the front in a powerful position and Thor behind, which causes him to seem conveniently of the same idea as his brother, which, symbolically, proves how they’re actually the same. Loki partially standing in front of him connects their figures, reinforcing the idea they’re on the same page.

In a way this episode showed them more similar than they seem to think to be, remember also how they previously blamed each other in an almost mirroring manner?

Or how Thor totally risked everything randomly playing the lur even if he had no idea if it would make matters better or worse?

I don’t know if there’s a goal in this comic beyond being funny, but I wonder if it could be they could understand they’re more similar than they think.

Whatever, Loki is clearly very happy to do his cool magic to the point he doesn’t even notice some sort of hole is opening up below them. Thor does and manages to warn his brother about it just in time for Loki to begin to say he is sure it’s noth—before they fall through it, losing hold of the hammer and the ball..

Thor blames Loki for this (forgetting he has allowed him to play in hope he wouldn’t have to clean up things) while Loki insists he maintains no responsibility.

Again though the image plays on how they’re similar. Both let go of their objects and both are in almost exactly the same pose, although Thor is upside down compared to Loki.

The comic ends here.

I’ve to say this volume was very well balanced in term of portraying both the siblings, with the visual depicting them often in the same position or in a mirroring one, but also with them making mistakes similar to their counterpart, or adopting their same behaviour.

So, as I said before, I don’t know if this comic has a point beyond the cute and funny tales but maybe it’s trying to set up the brothers so that they’ll realize they’re more similar than different?

We’ll see, maybe the meaning is just to make us smile, and in these times of pandemic this too is an important goal.

Anyway I love how cute and funny it is, I love the characters’ expressions and the dynamic of her art, the costant bitching of the siblings and... everything really.

Really, maybe it’s just a weird AU universe story but it’s lovely, you must read it.

As for me I just can’t wait to see the next episode!

[bamfoftheundead]

fic writer tag game

i was tagged by @dannybagpipesarecalling ! thank ya

fandoms: uhhh mostly x-men, the dark crystal, kinda bnha too and my middle school favs that i never truly grew out of Homestuck/Creepypasta. Im mostly active in x-men as of now and like dannybagpipes im really into Excalibur and catching up on a lot of the comics 0V0

number of fics: 1 lmaoo, i writer down my daydreams for potential comic script but they’re bad and suuuper unfiltered/edited.

fic i spent the most time on: desert winds of course, despite being a lil old thing. It took me abt an hour to write bc my ipad was charging n i was bored. Bead au would take the lead if i could get more of it done >:T

fic i spent the least time on: uhhh Queens bath? the new lil saucy drabble im working on but having a hard time bc WOW, i get flustered easier than i actually thought. Words are harder to write then drawing lines on a canvas

longest fic: actually this goes to that fanfic i wrote for my friends in 7th grade it was a slice of life of us living together casually, haven’t touched it since but it deffo is my longest fic

shortest fic: dfjdjdjjd middle school fanfic for the win again, this 800 word lil smut thing i wrote for my friend, it was between her and a naruto character and it was very badly written i can assure you

most hits: desert winds at 23 hits (what do those mean?)

most kudos: desert winds at 4 kudos :D

most comments: desert winds with 6! super proud, and i got a comment from a mystery user? love it

most bookmarks: desert winds, 1 (whoever u are ily)

total word count: 1,354

fav fic i wrote: definitely desert winds, ive never gotten so much feedback before :v

fic you wanna rewrite or expand on: uhhh desert winds ig, there still a lot of thing i don’t know abt writing and my learning disorder makes it hard to learn basic stuff so when i actually do get better at writing and understand things im deffo gonna rewrite everything i ever wrote

share a wip or story idea you’re planning on: well my bead au, still trying to get that done, im trying to make at LEAST one page 10k long, its my bare minimum and boy do i gotta long way to go. Another wip i think is something i did a long time ago (2017-18 i think) and i called it my “Pink diamond au” bc it was somewhat like pinks arc in su but instead it was abt kitty being a powerful/bratty princess whos also inhumanly tall (bc pink diamond/pearl dynamic ig) with a special bodyguard (kurt) whos somewhat strict and technically prince of a kingdom but since he was like more than a 5th son became a knight/paladin and how kitty suddenly became queen of a whole world and inherited amazing god-powers as a half celestial queen and struggled to rule and not be manipulated by others (azazel, belasco and mephisto who all have their own kingdoms) and how shes young/naive and just wanna do whats right and gets weirdass marriage proposals from kings/queens shes never even heard of, it was very high fantasy-ish and i definitely wanna do more with it.

tagging: uhhh @kurtty-drabbles if you haven’t done it yet? im afraid everyone i know has been tagged already :’)

[fueledbysprite]

Nathmarc November Day 9: Dance

oh look im alive

also rip my formatting screw you tumblr

Graduation.

They’ve all been waiting for this day for years, and yet now that it’s finally come, none of them really know how to feel about it. A strange mix of relief, regret, apprehension, and nostalgia hangs in the atmosphere, but a party is a party and they’re not going to waste their last day together as the graduating class of Collège Françoise Dupont. Tonight is the night for one last stab at making memories, before it’s all compressed, packed into a box, and shoved away to make headspace for lycée.

And making the most of it seems to be what everyone is determined to do tonight. Chloe, still on her awkward way to redemption, reserved the most luxurious hall at Le Grand Paris hotel, the effort into decoration and venue for this final night together is obvious. Nino has a mix ready for just this occasion, a playlist to highlight the interesting mixture of emotions that everyone’s going through at this point. Adrien and Marinette, the ever-iconic couple, have already initiated the couples dances, and Ivan and Mylene don’t take long to join them. Rose and Juleka are slightly more hesitant, then Kim runs to the floor with Ondine in one hand and Max in the other.

All while Nathaniel Kurtzberg and his fabulously aromantic best friend hang around by the snack bar, awkwardly watching the pairs (or, in Kim’s case, trio) dance it up on the center floor.

This is the last night, this is the last night, just one last night, Nathaniel repeats it over and over to himself under his breath, but his legs won’t move and his body is too stubborn to ask them to. They’ve been collaboration partners for goodness knows how long by now, but the exact dynamic of their relationship hangs in mid-air, not quite certain in any direction. He is an amazing friend, that part is certain, but is he more? And if he is, how much more? Nathaniel stares at the other side of the room, where the subject of his suppressed dilemma is currently engaged in conversation with Juleka’s older brother.

Marc, Nathaniel softly says his name out loud. That’s who his eyes are on tonight, and as uncertain as he’s convinced himself he is right now, the decisive voice in the back of his head is growing louder and he can’t keep denying it for much longer. No, he knows exactly what he wants tonight, what he’s been subconsciously wanting and hoping and dreaming and wishing for for months, now, but for all he is, he can’t find the right words. To be fair, he never could, not even after a childhood of growing up on comic books, he couldn’t word them himself. That’s what Marc was good at, wasn’t it? Too bad the one time he really, desperately needed Marc’s help with words was the one time he couldn’t.

Alix isn’t helping. At all. He glances over at her for support probably the umpteenth time tonight, but she’s resolutely ignoring him and instead occupying herself with taking a video of Kim’s antics on the dance floor. He already knows what she’d say even if he hadn’t driven her up a wall already with his panicked lament. She’d look him straight in the eye, draw herself up to full height, and, with a completely deadpan expression, say, “Just. Do it.” And he would go off blabbering about how badly he wanted to but just couldn’t and, well, yeah he really can’t blame Alix for resorting to giving him the cold shoulder at this point.

So he’s alone. He takes a slow sip of his shocking purple punch and cautiously chances another glance at Marc. Nathaniel sighs. Last night, last chance, final call…

***

Marc casually glances away from Luka for 0.1 seconds and immediately snaps his gaze back to the guitarist. He couldn’t be imagining it at this point, Nathaniel has definitely been watching him for the last how long had it even been now? He nods along to whatever Luka was saying, smiling with interest, but not really processing any of it. How could he, when his mind has been monopolized by someone else for at least the entirety of today. It’s his last chance to confess, last time he’ll probably ever have to tell Nath how he’s really felt towards him for the past year or so- it makes him scrunch up and hide his head in his hands just from the thought of it.

Well, to be fair, that isn’t entirely true, either. It’s not like they’re going to be attending different lycées or anything, but they aren’t taking the same courses and the chance they’ll actually be in the same class for any of them is pretty low. What Marc’s really most afraid of, even though he’s never going to ever admit to anyone in a million, bajillion years (and yes that is totally a word), is that Nath is inevitably going to end up in a much bigger fish pond than this small collège. And bigger means more people. And if someone new meets him and discovers how amazing Nathaniel really is and then start to feel towards him like Marc does- it makes his stomach twist that this thought has even occurred to him at all, and even moreso that Nathaniel really isn’t his and he has no right to feel possessive of him like this. Being able to even just be his collaboration partner, be producing the scripts to the comics whose concept art he’s only ever admired from afar, having his literal name on the literal front page of the comic books for all to see, he feels guilty for wanting more in spite of it all. Isn’t that human nature, to only ever crave more and yearn and hunger, never to be truly fulfilled? It’s not a nice feeling, but he’s wanted Nath for so, so long, and if he has a chance and loses it he doesn’t know what he’d do with himself.

And of course, the cherry on top of his anxiety, does Nath even feel the same way?

Marc doesn’t even notice himself absentmindedly picking at his nail polish, redone by Luka himself just for tonight, until Luka waves his hand in front of Marc’s face and asks him if he’s okay.

“You seem kind of out of it,” Luka says, and Marc whips his stare away from the either oblivious or now-self-conscious redhead on the opposite end of the room.

“I’m fine,” Marc assures him quickly, cheeks warming.

“Hey Luka, mind if I steal Marc for a second?” Marinette’s innocent voice comes out of nowhere and Marinette herself suddenly materializes next to Marc.

“Go right ahead,” Luka tells her, winking, and she giggles softly before dragging Marc away. Marc’s mind only strays from Nathaniel to briefly wonder what’s up between Marinette and Luka, but he doesn’t dwell on it for long at all, not when there are far more pressing matters to be addressed. Thankfully his mind zips back to the moment just in time to catch Marinette before she goes too far.

“Stop it right there,” he stops her, and she complies. “I know exactly what you’re doing and I’m not going to let you go any further.”

She looks at him in half-hearted exasperation and frustration.

“If I don’t help you get from Point A to Point B, who is?” she points out.

“I can do it myself,” he says hastily, and she raises an eyebrow that most obviously says “oh, really?”

“I can!” he repeats defensively, and Marinette laughs.

“I’m just teasing, you know that, of course. But really, are you sure you can?” she challenges, and he swallows. “See, told you! Trust me, I can help you, and I know just what to do,” she winks.

If anything, that makes him less at ease.

“No,” he refuses flatly. “I can do it myself and I’ll prove it,” he decides, reasoning that anything is better than another one of Marinette’s failed ploys.

Marinette, bless her heart, may be well-intending, but she was not very good at wingwomaning.

Which was how he ended up here, staring at the floor, heart sinking like he was walking to his own execution, breathing shallow, his mind ceasing to function but his mouth managing to move just enough to whisper words of encouragement to his pitiful self.

“Just put one...foot...in front...of another...” he mutters softly. It works. Too well, apparently, because he ends up in front of Nathaniel a lot sooner than he’d have ideally liked to.

Nathaniel looks up in surprise.

“Oh, hi, M-” But he doesn’t get to finish because Marc knows that if he doesn’t do this now, he never will again.

“Will you dance with me,” he says, voice just above a breath.

“S-sorry?” Nathaniel asks, eyes widening. Marc sets his resolve even more solid and takes a deep breath.

“Will you dance with me?” he repeats, fully aware that the mix is transitioning to the last couples song on the track. It’s now or never.

“Y-yes?” Nathaniel manages to stutter out, and Marc feels himself deflate and soar up with relief at the same time.

They’re both a little shaky walking up to the dance floor. Even more awkward trying to figure out how to go about this. Nath ultimately takes the lead, placing one of Marc’s hands on his own, Marc placing the other on the redhead’s shoulder himself. The first steps are uncomfortable as heck, but they make do, avoiding looking at each other at all cost. At some point, Nathaniel feels a sudden surge of adrenaline and breaks their hold on either to tilt Marc’s chin up, looking him right in the eye.

Their steps become smoother, almost fluid, as their bodies move without thinking, without sensing, practically floating on a fluffy cotton cloud of bliss. They’re lost in each other’s gaze for heavens knows how long, and when the song finally slows to a finale, it feels like it’s been forever in a blink. They jerk back to reality, staggering off the dance floor, nothing short of euphoria in the air. Alix is applauding, and Marinette, and Adrien and Rose and Juleka too. The others don’t seem to have noticed anything, but the world has flipped almost upside down for Marc and Nathaniel.

“So, I guess it’s a little late to ask this, but, uh...you want to be my boyfriend?” Nathaniel asks shyly, cheeks flushed with happiness.

Marc doesn’t even bother giving him a reply, instead tackling him in an embrace, kissing him on the cheek for the sake of holding back. Someday there’ll be a day for a real first kiss, but today isn’t it, and Marc doesn’t care at this point.

They’re boyfriends. They’re happy. And collège is finally over. The only reasonable thing to do tonight is celebrate the heck out of this evening. The first few lyrics of Panic! at the Disco’s Victorious float over from Nino’s DJ Booth, and party the night away they do indeed.