#the consequences of emotional neglect by one's primary caregiver or guardian

[transgender-catboy]

UGH I HATE HAVING FEELINGS

[guardian-rocket]

Rocket - RAD (Diagnosis)

So stemming from a conversation I was having about diagnoses for mental disorders, I think we came to a conclusion on two particular disorders I believe Rocket would have, both stemming from his childhood trauma.  One is being Over Compulsive Disorder which I may get into at another time, another being Reactive Attachment Disorder. **(Also PTSD but that goes without saying).

Disclaimer: I am not a licensed psychologist I just have a deep interest in psychology and have some education in the matter from college, along with personal experiences as an adult who was formally diagnosed with this same disorder as a teen.   Reference for the facts here were gathered from: 1, 2

Starting off, I believe Rocket early on develops a Reactive Attachment Disorder.  I believe this is his primary mental disorder, and anything else stems from it.

Signs and symptoms may include:

Unexplained withdrawal, fear, sadness or irritability (He is generally antisocial)

Sad and listless appearance (a lot of times when he isn’t around others or thinks they’re not looking he looks generally sad )

Not seeking comfort or showing no response when comfort is given (When the elder Groot passes away, Rocket cries alone not seeking any comfort.  When the Guardians get dusted, Rocket doesn’t seek comfort *from* Nebula, it seems he is more trying to *give* her comfort and when he gets it back he looks pained.)

Failure to smile (Often during celebrations or good times, Rocket looks uninterested or only half there.  Reference the holiday special, it isn’t until the end of Vol 3 when he confronts his traumas that he ever seems genuinely blissful.)

Watching others closely but not engaging in social interaction (Vol 1 first scene with Rocket, he is just jeering at the random people, in general he doesn’t socialize well) 

Behavior problems ( he does what he wants regardless of consequences )

Not showing positive emotions, like comfort, love or joy when interacting with others. (He generally doesn’t give much affection even though he wants it until vol 3. when he’s finally able to hug.)

Avoiding eye contact and physical touch. (he doesn’t look at Drax when Drax pets him, he nearly bites Mantis for touching him, he’s bit people before.)

Expressing fear or anger by throwing tantrums or frequently showing unhappiness or sadness. (He beats up grass)

Trying to find things in their environment that they can control, which makes them likely to break rules.  (he loves to feel like he has control of situations, and breaks rules even after confrontations about it)

Risk factors

The risk of developing reactive attachment disorder from severe social and emotional neglect or the lack of opportunity to develop stable attachments may increase in children who, for example:

Live in a children's home or other institution ( He was in a lab )

Multiple caretakers: The child doesn’t know who to trust. (The recorders, The High Evolutionary, his natural mother, maybe even Lylla to some extent and later, possible others) 

Have parents who have severe mental health problems, criminal behavior or substance abuse that impairs their parenting (High Evolutionary had mental problems, I think we can agree on that)

Have prolonged separation from parents or other caregivers due to repeated out-of-home placement, hospitalization or death of a primary caregiver (He was taken from his natural mother at 2 weeks of age, which is at about 6 weeks before he should have been)

Abuse or neglect: The child feels abandoned or alone. (He was abused and Neglected)

Inconsistent caregiving: The child’s needs are only being met some of the time, particularly if they don’t know when to expect their caregivers to reward or console them (at times he was nurtured, but mostly he was caged)

Safety: The child fears that they are in danger. (He was in danger)

Lack of hygiene (Dirty cage)

Are there complications associated with reactive attachment disorder?

Physical, emotional and social neglect and abuse put children with RAD at higher risk for complications in childhood and adolescence. These complications may include:

Emotional problems, such as depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder and anger management issues. (We know he has all of these issues)

Eating disorders. (Not any evidence but he does show signs of being fatphobic to Thor and Peter so there is at least a hint of the mentality behind it)

Drug and alcohol abuse. (He does drink to the point of public drunkedness but not saying this is a huge issue for him )

Problems in relationships with peers or adults, and later with partners (Right after joining the Guardians he isn’t even sure he wants to be there and continues to doubt is relations at all times, but is seen muscling through it for the sake of maintaining them.  Likely due to wanting to be there for Groot more than anything.) 

Risk-taking. (stealing, working in areas of high risk and high stakes )

[cummunication]

Why I’m fucked up

You may have heard of attachment before... “I’m so attached to you” is something most of us can relate to feeling or being told at some point. However, in this instance I’m not referring to the kind of attachment where a child may physically attach himself to his mother's leg. The kind of attachment I’m talking about is attachment [injury] discussed in psychology. “In psychology, attachment refers to the major social and relational connection a child makes, such as with a mother or father. The primary caregiver in a child’s life is usually who he or she attaches to, and this is most often the mother. It can also be a father, an older sibling, a grandparent, or another guardian, whoever spends the most time with the child and provides most of the caregiving. Attachment trauma is a disruption in the important process of bonding between a baby or child and his or her primary caregiver. That trauma may be overt abuse or neglect, or it may be less obvious—lack of affection or response from the caregiver.” There are two main styles of attachment; secure and insecure. These styles can influence how an individual forms relationships later and whether they are largely successful or are riddled with conflict and problems. The large majority of people have secure attachment - which sets them up for happy, healthy relationships in the future. This doesn’t necessarily mean their childhood was perfect, however, (for the most part) their parents were available and taught them how to form and maintain healthy boundaries in relationships. The other kind of attachment (insecure) can be broken down further into anxious and avoidant attachment. I have previously written a blog on avoidant attachment, which is the style I identify with. We can have mixed attachment (anxious and avoidant) however, most of us will lean towards one side or the other. I myself, relate mostly to avoidant attachment because of what I believe was an initial childhood injury. “Attachment trauma, an early form of relational trauma, occurs when there is some disruption in the healthy bond formation between a baby or child and his or her primary caregiver. Healthy attachment occurs when the caregiver provides comfort, affection, and basic needs on a regular basis and with consistency. Poor attachment, inappropriate responses to a baby’s distress, lack of affection, abusive behaviors, and the absence of the caregiver can all cause a traumatic experience for the child.” I was given up for adoption as an infant and although I obviously don’t remember this, I recall finding out and remember my first initial thought of “why did my parents give me up?”. “The consequences of attachment trauma can be far-reaching, because a positive caregiver-child bond helps to establish healthy development, self-confidence, self-regulation, and a pattern for developing other relationships. Trauma associated with this important bond can lead to a wide range of issues from poor social development to serious mental illness.” Not only that (being adopted; which left me with a core abandonment wound) but growing up my father was terminally ill and died from cancer when I was 15. Due to these attachment traumas (being adopted and my dad dying) I have a deep, inner belief that I end up losing everybody I love. I associate love with pain which attracts unhealthy people. I am not super needy nor have I ever been extremely clingy (which leans more towards anxious attachment), rather, I am more avoidant of relationships altogether. I have a huge heart but intimacy scares the hell out of me and tends to bring out my neuroses. This can be because I correlate love with loss, heartbreak and grief which I’d do almost anything to avoid. I suppose in my mind the only way to avoid such things is to reject love altogether. “Whether attachment proceeds in a healthy way or not, it influences later relationships. It influences confidence, self-esteem, and choices of romantic partners. The other styles of attachment are not healthy and may be considered incomplete, because a secure attachment never developed. These can result in developmental problems, behavioral issues, emotional challenges, poor self-esteem, poor impulse control, difficulty trusting others, a lack of depth in relationships, impaired social functioning, and cognitive difficulties. These problems begin in childhood and may continue into adulthood if an individual does not learn to establish healthier patterns.” Subconsciously, I attract people who make my worst fears come true (grief and heartbreak). I either attract emotionally unavailable people or people who are dysfunctional, confirming my insecurities that I do not deserve love. Although I am aware of my faults, it is something I’ve been working on for years in therapy and continue to work on daily. It’s one thing to be aware of your shortcomings, have insight and education on a topic, yet it’s another to actually implement the knowledge, make changes and not let your ego run the show. Bottom line is, “when you let yourself be emotionally close and vulnerable with another person, there’s always a chance you might hurt each other, even by accident. By taking the time to understand and treat attachment injuries, you can help keep yourself and your relationships strong, healthy, and optimized.”