OMGGGGGG RYENNNNN I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUđđđđâ€ïžâ€ïžâ€ïžâ€ïžyou write beautifully, majestically, elegantly, romantically, heartbreaking, exciting and if I could just find the right word to compliment you, I wouldđ„č youâre really everything #mytwin
I literally read the chapter as soon as I got off work that night it came out and then reread it again right after so I could find quotes and give you the review of a lifetimeeee. I also reread twice today leading up to me sending my review. Oh how I love 3tan and you sm â€ïžâđ„
BUT ANYWAYSSYSYS?!?!?!?! The jk reveal that they had something going on, but he still feels sm love for her even after breaking her heart (I wonder if it was him trying to let her go when she was leaving and the whole situation got misunderstood) but I really thought this revelation in the chapter would predict all the future angst of 3tan9 and then no happiness between yoongi and oc, but ofc Iâm WRONG?!?!! (Happily) I really wonder how everyone will take the news of them messing with each other now
ALSO JIN AS BROTHER?!?!?!?!?!?!? I actually thought it was joon, but joon and hobi being yoongiâs studio mates actually makes sm sense and Jin is obviously the dream big brother. I remember oc said something about how they (jin) went through a lot w their parents and I wonder if that bonded them more to want to live together as adults.
I ALSO HAVE QUOTES FROM EVERYTIME I HAD A MENTAL BREAKDOWN READING (some might not be in order as I literally re read 18 times:
âYou donât see what he does when silent, but you feel his jewelry slide against your ass when he leans forward to kiss the sore spot. âCareful, love,â he wisps into your skin. â PLS IM ACTUALLY BITING MY PILLOW WHEN I REREAD THIS FOR THE 34TH TIME OMGMFIVAIXIA
âSomething solid pushes into your nose before he stops, tearing his glasses off to kiss you straight into another plane of existence.â I NEVER WATCHED BUSINESS PROPOSAL BUT THIS DEF REMINDED ME OF THAT KISS SCENE THAT BLEW UPđđđ
âAs you pull him in impossibly close, a thought pierces through you like lightning. That maybeâjust maybeâhe speaks through actions, because his mind already says too much.â Thereâs not much to say butđ„čđ„čđ„č
âAnd you only feel the softest press of lips on your own. ⊠Time bends when youâre pulled into the most tender kiss heâs ever given, and everything around you melts away. The song fades to background noise, but itâs still wonderful, hearing his distinct voice on recording while feeling his lips in person.â - I might actually cry. The tender kisses throughout the story have made me melt in ways I didnât know was possible. I was already down for this couple BUT NOWWWW??? Yeah scoot over, Iâm joiningđđ
âWhen he buries his head in your neck, he breathes you inâŠâI know I havenât said my pieceâŠBut Iâm really fucking into you, doll.â yooooooonnnnnnnđđđđđđđđđđđđđđ« đ« đ« đ« đ« đ« đ«
on a serious note, I am actually married to yoongi and the way youâve managed to put our real life marriage into exact words is frightening???đ€Żđ€Ż
OMGGGG THE SCENE WHERE THEYRE IN BED HOLDING EACH OTHER AND SHE TELLS HIM THAT HES ALL SHE NEEDS AS SHES CRYING, BUT WHEN HE LIFTS HIMSELF UP, HE WAS ACTUALLY THE ONE CRYINGđ„Č
âAs soon as you loosen your hold, he pushes upward, and you realize with a visceral burn that those tears you felt werenât yoursâŠRaw at their edges, just as welled, his eyes hold the heavens inside as he continues to regard you like youâll still run.âđ„Čđ„Čđ„Čđ„Čđ„Čđ„Čđ
âAnd as a man that speaks through actions, Yoongi responds with a kiss reminiscent of moonlight.â This actually became my favorite quote ever. đ„Č
âAnd why wouldnât he? Jungkook probably talked about that damn ring he has on his chainâthe same one you still have in your bottom drawer.â UMMM??? I DIDNT KNOW THEY WERE THAT SERIOUS??? HES STILL WEARING IT.
Lowkey nervous because JK never shows to back down from a fight and I feel like heâs gonna be here for a while trying to win oc back⊠or maybe notđ§ I will be back with later thoughts on what I think.
But alas⊠the quote that ruined me fully:
âWhereâs my hi?â
HWCHWUVIEOCOSICJWJXJAICRKFOFOFSPZ IDK WHY BUT HIM SAYING THAT KNOWING HOW FLUSTERED SHE GETS OMGKGG. there will be a 1200 word analysis on these 3 words in ur inbox later⊠WHAT WAS THE REASON????
Also one quick question⊠will the future drabbles continue with them in their entanglement or will it be w their new sneaky, but confirmed relationship??
This was so long Iâm sorryđđđđ but this was so good and fulfilling (as always) I canât wait to read more of what you put out for us, youâll have my support foreverđ„Čđ«¶
-đ
AHHHHH CHERRYYYY this is so fckinsfnfjfdnj amazing?? i have many many words under the cut because i am floored by everything in this reviewđ
OMGGGGGG RYENNNNN I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUđđđđâ€ïžâ€ïžâ€ïžâ€ïžyou write beautifully, majestically, elegantly, romantically, heartbreaking, exciting and if I could just find the right word to compliment you, I wouldđ„č youâre really everything #mytwin
thank you, baby! you used a bunch of words that have me blushing fr fr. thank you so much for all of these kind descriptions, wow..
I literally read the chapter as soon as I got off work that night it came out and then reread it again right after so I could find quotes and give you the review of a lifetimeeee. I also reread twice today leading up to me sending my review. Oh how I love 3tan and you sm â€ïžâđ„
WAIT you reread it? twice?? that is a lot of words to go over holy heck.. but this review is certainly something and i am lucky af to have you reading along. wow.
BUT ANYWAYSSYSYS?!?!?!?! The jk reveal that they had something going on, but he still feels sm love for her even after breaking her heart (I wonder if it was him trying to let her go when she was leaving and the whole situation got misunderstood) but I really thought this revelation in the chapter would predict all the future angst of 3tan9 and then no happiness between yoongi and oc, but ofc Iâm WRONG?!?!! (Happily) I really wonder how everyone will take the news of them messing with each other now
YEAHHH THE JK REVEAL!! it's a lot deeper than people ever imagined and that's what makes it heartbreaking.. and yoongi bowing out when he believes this is the better option?? it hurts. it hurts it hurts but then we get their actual exercise of communication. happy they decided to work things out after reader calls out yoongi so blatantly!
ALSO JIN AS BROTHER?!?!?!?!?!?!? I actually thought it was joon, but joon and hobi being yoongiâs studio mates actually makes sm sense and Jin is obviously the dream big brother. I remember oc said something about how they (jin) went through a lot w their parents and I wonder if that bonded them more to want to live together as adults.
AHHHH it's not jin! it's none of the members ahaha. but them all in the studio hell yeah.. those scenes were super fun to work on. they did have some stuff with the family so maybe we'll hear more about that later.
I ALSO HAVE QUOTES FROM EVERYTIME I HAD A MENTAL BREAKDOWN READING (some might not be in order as I literally re read 18 times:
âYou donât see what he does when silent, but you feel his jewelry slide against your ass when he leans forward to kiss the sore spot. âCareful, love,â he wisps into your skin. â PLS IM ACTUALLY BITING MY PILLOW WHEN I REREAD THIS FOR THE 34TH TIME OMGMFIVAIXIA
GOODBYEEEE NOT THE FIRST QUOTE BEING THE CHAINS ON READERS ASSSSSSSS I LOVE YOU HAHAHAH
âSomething solid pushes into your nose before he stops, tearing his glasses off to kiss you straight into another plane of existence.â I NEVER WATCHED BUSINESS PROPOSAL BUT THIS DEF REMINDED ME OF THAT KISS SCENE THAT BLEW UPđđđ
LMFAOOO so what's even worse here is that.. i've seen the scene you're talking about. but yoongi takes off his glasses much faster than what happens in that kiss. he practically rips them off and throws them on his counter i'm swooning FUUUUC
âAs you pull him in impossibly close, a thought pierces through you like lightning. That maybeâjust maybeâhe speaks through actions, because his mind already says too much.â Thereâs not much to say butđ„čđ„čđ„č
awhhhhhh this line, too :'))) it's so heartwarming to see that reader really is starting to read yoongi well. i just think that part of her character dev is dope as fck.
âAnd you only feel the softest press of lips on your own. ⊠Time bends when youâre pulled into the most tender kiss heâs ever given, and everything around you melts away. The song fades to background noise, but itâs still wonderful, hearing his distinct voice on recording while feeling his lips in person.â - I might actually cry. The tender kisses throughout the story have made me melt in ways I didnât know was possible. I was already down for this couple BUT NOWWWW??? Yeah scoot over, Iâm joiningđđ
dear goddddd i warned y'all that kissing was a warning for a reason this time! i haven't counted how many kisses are in this one but i'm fairly damn certain it's more than what's in all the other chapters. and hahahah join the line get in wait ur turn i wanna be with them too LOLOL
âWhen he buries his head in your neck, he breathes you inâŠâI know I havenât said my pieceâŠBut Iâm really fucking into you, doll.â yooooooonnnnnnnđđđđđđđđđđđđđđ« đ« đ« đ« đ« đ« đ«
HELP MEEEEEEE THIS DAMN LINE
on a serious note, I am actually married to yoongi and the way youâve managed to put our real life marriage into exact words is frightening???đ€Żđ€Ż
BABY PLEASE LMFAO don't tell yoongi i'm writing y'all fr ok i don't want him to perceive me like this ufhsfhsfh
OMGGGG THE SCENE WHERE THEYRE IN BED HOLDING EACH OTHER AND SHE TELLS HIM THAT HES ALL SHE NEEDS AS SHES CRYING, BUT WHEN HE LIFTS HIMSELF UP, HE WAS ACTUALLY THE ONE CRYINGđ„Č
âAs soon as you loosen your hold, he pushes upward, and you realize with a visceral burn that those tears you felt werenât yoursâŠRaw at their edges, just as welled, his eyes hold the heavens inside as he continues to regard you like youâll still run.âđ„Čđ„Čđ„Čđ„Čđ„Čđ„Čđ
OH MY GOD YEAH.. when yoongi props himself up and we can see his tears? nah. i was done at that point. absolutely fcking gone and there was no going back i actually cried there, too.
âAnd as a man that speaks through actions, Yoongi responds with a kiss reminiscent of moonlight.â This actually became my favorite quote ever. đ„Č
oh stop. STOP ITTT i can't do this is it really oh lord i'm gonna actually hide now. honored!!
âAnd why wouldnât he? Jungkook probably talked about that damn ring he has on his chainâthe same one you still have in your bottom drawer.â UMMM??? I DIDNT KNOW THEY WERE THAT SERIOUS??? HES STILL WEARING IT.
Lowkey nervous because JK never shows to back down from a fight and I feel like heâs gonna be here for a while trying to win oc back⊠or maybe notđ§ I will be back with later thoughts on what I think.
DFSDFFJDF NOT ONLY IS THERE A REVEAL BUT THERE ARE LAYERS TO IT. there are certainly more things that need to be uncovered here but it's like. yeah. it seems - as of now and from what we can see - that they were pretty fcking serious.
and i totally get the nervousness surrounding jk! he's super competitive and he's clearly determined and stubborn if he's this successful right now. we shall see! happy to hear any thoughts or theories you end up having :D
But alas⊠the quote that ruined me fully: âWhereâs my hi?â
HWCHWUVIEOCOSICJWJXJAICRKFOFOFSPZ IDK WHY BUT HIM SAYING THAT KNOWING HOW FLUSTERED SHE GETS OMGKGG. there will be a 1200 word analysis on these 3 words in ur inbox later⊠WHAT WAS THE REASON????
HAHAHAHAHH HE WANTS TO FIGHT. I JUST KNOW IT. MEET ME IN THE BACK OF A WENDYS SIR. down to hear the word analysis and screaming on this later i will not be mad at all LMAO
Also one quick question⊠will the future drabbles continue with them in their entanglement or will it be w their new sneaky, but confirmed relationship??
so.. this was the other surprise i was gonna wait to tell y'all. most of the drabbles are meant to be after this! (loosely-imagined, since the party is still happening) so you can read them as if they happen after 3tan9<3
This was so long Iâm sorryđđđđ but this was so good and fulfilling (as always) I canât wait to read more of what you put out for us, youâll have my support foreverđ„Čđ«¶
you are so damn kind, cherry! it was a pleasure to read as always and i treasure every word. you had so many good quotes and commentary!! super glad you decided to make it this way, no worries at all :D
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Too Good To Be True - Ch. 48 | kth(m)
Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. Youâve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but itâs getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. Heâs affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but thatâs how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.
pairing: Taehyung x reader
genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn
rating: 18+
word count: 7.0k
warnings: none
A/N: I am so sorry đ
Chapter 48: Lying To Yourself - Part 3
†previous || next ℠|| masterlist
You woke the following morning to an empty bed.
It was unusual for Tae to wake up before you because he was such a late and heavy sleeper and even more unusual for him to then leave the bed entirely. Usually when he woke up first he would gently rouse you with a series of feather-light kisses placed all over your face: your forehead, the tip of your nose, the apple of your cheek, your lips themselves. It was by far the best way to be woken up and oftentimes you would pretend to still be asleep just so he would keep spoiling you with kisses. Eventually, though, you would be unable to contain your smile any longer at which point heâd realize you were awake and say âGood morning, beautifulâ.
Sadly, this morning you received no such sweet and tender awakening. Instead, you woke to the jarring blast of sound that was your alarm. You honestly couldnât remember the last time youâd needed your alarm to wake up on time. Given that you were a true morning person, you typically woke up naturally hours before it even went off. Last night youâd gotten to bed rather late, though, and had then struggled to fall asleep. It wasnât surprising that you slept so long and were still feeling exhausted.
As memories from last night began trickling back in, you felt that heavy blanket of unease once again envelope you. It had been a strange night, one that was perhaps as stressful as you imagined it would be, but for reasons you never would have predicted when you woke up yesterday. Although Tae had apologized for his behavior, and had assured you it had nothing to do with you, the night had still ended on a disquieting note. Him not being here when you woke up had you picking up right where you left off: in a state of confusion and worry.
Trying your best to remain calm, you turned over to grab your phone off the nightstand only to be met with a surprising sight: Tanju, propped up by a small vase filled with purple flowers, accompanied by a folded paper heart laid at his feet. You recognized the beautiful blossoms immediately; they were azaleas, the exact same shade as the ones that grew in the small indoor garden located in the apartment complexâs main lobby. A tiny smile crept onto your face as you picked up the paper heart and unfolded it to reveal a note written in a small, neat, familiar script.
Jagi,
I had to head out early today so I could talk to Jimin before the shoot starts. I wanted to let you sleep a little longer since I kept you up so late last night. You also just looked so pretty and peaceful while sleeping that I couldnât bring myself to wake you.
I am so sorry for the way I acted when I got home last night. It was wrong of me to take my frustration out on you like that. I am ashamed to have hurt you and made you sad. Iâm supposed to keep you safe and happy, but I did the complete opposite.
I promise I will work to become a better man for you, sweetheart. You deserve the world and I want to give it to you. I love you so much.
~ Tae
P.S. Tanju picked these flowers for you because they are beautiful just like you. I told him that the maintenance staff wasnât going to be too happy with him, but he claims no one saw him do it.
By the time you were done reading, your tiny smile had morphed into a big, dopey grin. Tae must have picked the flowers after taking Tannie out for a walk earlier that morning. You could just picture him furtively glancing around the lobby before reaching into the garden to pluck out a couple and then casually walking away with them hidden under his jacket. It was such a silly, Tae-like thing to do, but it was an incredibly sweet gesture nonetheless.
The fact that he took the time to write out a sincere apology meant a lot to you. As you read through it once more, you felt the residual hurt and anxiety from last night fading away. Couples fight. People get upset and say and do things they donât mean. It happens. There had certainly been more than a few times over the last two months where youâd snapped at Tae, whether because you were tired or hungry or just randomly in a bad mood.
You realized that the unique circumstances of the evening were making it seem worse than it really was. The truth was you were already on edge when he got home because you were planning to tell him your big news. The fact that he was off working on something that you didnât fully understand yet also didnât help. If it had been any other night and he came home in a bit of a surly mood, it wouldnât have bothered you nearly as much. It was just bad timing.
Your fight aside, there was still the question of why Tae wore a shirt to bed. You had contemplated numerous possible reasons for this before sleep finally took you. They ranged from the completely innocent - he forgot to take it off - to the somewhat outlandish - he got a secret tattoo or piercing - all the way to the highly disconcerting - he was concealing injuries on his body from some kind of accident or physical altercation.
You had fallen asleep before you could settle on which seemed most plausible, but now that you were awake the most likely reason seemed fairly obvious: because it was unusually cold in the apartment at the moment. While you didnât specifically remember it being cold last night, you didnât remember it being warm either. You had also been drinking and had spent all night wrapped up in a blanket on the couch. Maybe the apartment was this cold last night and Tae decided to keep his shirt on to stay warm?
Whatever the reason for his unusual choice of sleepwear, you would find out about it when you and him finally talked which, you just realized, wasnât going to be this morning. In all honesty, even if he was here right now youâre not sure you would even try to have the talk. There was just too much to say, too many bad feelings that needed to be worked through, and not enough time. Thereâs also no way either of you could have that conversation and then spend all day surrounded by tons of people trying to act totally normal.
It will just have to wait until tonight.
As you got up and began getting ready for the day, you realized that it was probably for the best that Tae was going to talk to Jimin right now. They might not have actually hung out last night, but Jimin did know what Tae was working on and would hopefully be able to help calm him down. You hated seeing him so upset, but until you two talked about everything there unfortunately wasnât really anything you could do to help.
A half hour and several cups of coffee later, you were in the elevator heading down to the parking garage when you remembered you hadnât texted Tae yet that morning. Not wanting him to think you missed his gifts or worse, saw them but didnât care, you quickly pulled out your phone and sent him a message.
[8:34 AM]
Thank you for the note and the flowers.
[8:34 AM]
They were both beautiful.
[Taehyung 8:35 AM]
You are beautiful.
[Taehyung 8:35 AM]
And I love you.
[Taehyung 8:35 AM]
And Iâm sorry again.
[8:36 AM]
I love you too.
[8:36 AM]
And I forgive you.
[8:37 AM]
Were you able to work things out with Jimin?
[Taehyung 8:38 AM]
Yea we had a good talk this morning.
[8:38 AM]
Good Iâm glad đ
[8:39 AM]
But hey I just got into the car.
[Taehyung 8:39 AM]
OK Iâll let you go.
[Taehyung 8:39 AM]
No texting while driving!
[Taehyung 8:39 AM]
And be sure to wear your seatbelt.
[Taehyung 8:40 AM]
Iâll see you soon, sweetheart.
[8:40 AM]
đ
Smiling to yourself at his unnecessary, but adorable protectiveness, you put down your phone and put on your seatbelt like you were told and headed off towards Big Hit.
Twenty minutes later you were walking into the studio, feeling infinitely better than you had when you first woke up. You had spent the drive listening to a playlist Tae made for you which mostly consisted of sappy love songs. Several of them were ones he actually shared with ARMY during his TaeTae FM Vlives earlier in the year. At the time it broke your heart to hear him play those songs and realize he was obviously in love with someone, but little did you know that someone was you.
âGood morning, Y/N,â Mrs. Choi said with a warm smile as you set your bag down.
âHi, Mrs. Choi,â you replied, returning the gesture. âHow are you today?â
âStressed,â she said with a laugh. âThereâs just so many moving pieces when we do this shoot.â
âYea, coordinating all the different groups and individuals is no small feat,â you agreed as you looked around the busy room.
âPlease let me know if thereâs anything I can do to help,â you then added.
âThere actually is something I wanted to ask you about,â she quickly replied.
You looked over at her with a curious expression as you waited for her to continue.
âOne of the TXT stylists unfortunately isn't going to be able to make it here today,â she revealed. âTheyâve suddenly fallen quite ill.â
âAnother one of their stylists is also currently out on maternity leave,â she continued. âTheir manager has been filling in for the last few weeks, but with a second stylist now out they are in a bit of a bind.â
âWould you be willing to transfer over there for today to help them out?â she asked tentatively.
âI would fill in for you here and work with Taehyung,â she then added.
If Mrs. Choi had asked you this a few months ago, you would have been absolutely convinced she was simply trying to get you out of her studio and out of her hair. However, as she stood there before you sporting a hesitant smile, you were certain that was not at all the case. Her asking you to join their team for the day was actually sort of flattering. It meant she was confident in your abilities and trusted you to represent the BTS team well. As much as you wanted to spend the day with Tae, you wanted to prove to her that you were worthy of her trust and confidence.
âI would be happy to help them out,â you replied honestly. âIâll pack up my things now and head over there in a few minutes.â
âThank you so much, Y/N,â she said brightly. âI know you will make me proud.â
The strange truth was that over the past month you and Mrs. Choi had grown significantly closer. Since that Friday when you almost had a panic attack during your conversation with Eunji and Donghae, she had been going out of her way to talk to you and check in with you to make sure you were doing alright. Her kindness and support had actually come to mean a great deal to you given how lonely and anxious you often felt at work these days.
She hadnât specifically said anything, but you knew that she noticed the shift in your relationship with Tae. After years of scolding the two of you for being too loud and rowdy, the fact that you no longer talked much or joked around was surely obvious to her. You were also pretty sure she had correctly surmised that this was because Tae and Jisoo were now âtogetherâ.
She clearly did not like Jisoo; her vitriol for the young woman was stronger than it had been for you even at the worst of times. On more than one occasion she had come over and told Jisoo to stop disrupting everyone in her studio. One time she even straight up asked Jisoo to leave. Tae had also evidently fallen out of her good graces, no doubt because of who he now associated himself with. You felt guilty knowing her disappointment in Tae was misplaced, but you hoped she would come around once he ended his ârelationshipâ with Jisoo.
While you were loading up your carrying case with brushes and makeup pallets and anything else you thought you might need for the day, Tae suddenly walked into the room. For half a second he looked a little surprised to see you, but then his face broke out into a big, boxy smile. It instantly faltered, though, once he saw what you were doing.
âWhy are you packing up?â he asked, giving you a curious and slightly concerned look.
âTXT is a little short-staffed today so Iâm actually going to be working on their team for the shoot,â you said apologetically, hating the way his face fell as you spoke.
âYouâre leaving me?â he said, giving you the most adorable pout youâd ever seen.
âJust for today,â you assured him. âIâll be back on Monday.â
âBut, why do you have to go?â he whined as he continued jutting out his lower lip. âWhy canât someone else go?â
âBecause Mrs. Choi asked nicely and I wanted to help,â you replied in a hushed tone. âShe likes me now, you know, and Iâd like to keep it that way.â
âSo enough with the pouting,â you then scolded gently. âItâs just one photoshoot.â
âStill, I donât like it,â he huffed out under his breath.
âTheyâre going to think youâre cute and fun and fall in love with you instantly and want to keep you,â he then said worriedly, keeping his voice down so no one else could hear.
âYou make me sound like a lost puppy that was found on the street,â you said with a laugh.
Realizing that was exactly how he just described the situation, a silly grin replaced his pout and he started to laugh too.
âOk, fine. You can abandon me for the day,â he then said with an exaggerated sigh. âI swear I wonât hold it against you for the rest of your life.â
âJust promise me youâll come back, Jagi,â he then said softly, ironically giving you his puppy dog eyes.
âI promise,â you said back with a shy smile.
~~~
The TXT studio was on the same floor, but at the opposite end of the hallway. It was a little smaller than BTSâs, which made sense given that their group was smaller, but otherwise looked remarkably similar. You had been there a handful of times over the years, mostly to drop off something Mrs. Choi asked you to bring to their stylistâs manager, Baekhyun. Having mingled at enough company-wide functions, you were fairly well acquainted with him and the groupâs stylists. They were all very friendly, but you were still a tad nervous to be joining their team on such short notice and for an event as big as this.
However, as soon as you stepped foot in the room your worries melted away. You were met with an incredibly warm welcome from both the staff as well as the members who all thanked you for coming to help out. After briefly meeting with Baekhyun, he brought you over to Beomgyu, the member who you would be working with for the day. You had met the young man on numerous occasions, but he was still adorably shy when you said hello. Tae was Beomgyuâs BTS bias, and the idol he looked up to most, so you wondered if that had anything to do with his nervousness around you.
Once you started getting him ready and he began to open up, you soon found that he actually reminded you a lot of Tae. He was extremely talkative and energetic, but also incredibly sweet. He had a very bright personality and seemed to simply radiate positive energy. He also just so happened to have an incredibly deep voice and be from Daegu. You had heard people make comparisons between him and Tae before and now that you were actually talking with him at length you understood why. Obviously, no one would ever replace Tae, but it was kind of nice to be spending the day with someone whose personality you knew yours meshed well with.
In all honesty, though, it would be hard not to get along with any of the guys. They were all so great, so kind and funny and outgoing. They were also all so young, most of them not even 20 and technically still teenagers, that at 26 you felt positively ancient. Their youthfulness made the environment in the room much more relaxed and playful than it was in your own studio which you loved. Given that you were used to being rowdy and silly with Tae, you felt like you fit right in.
Despite the fact that you were genuinely enjoying yourself, you did still miss him which is why you started smiling down at your phone like an idiot when he texted you.
[Taehyung 11:01 AM]
How is my puppy doing?
[Taehyung 11:02 AM]
Are you having fun in your new home?
[11:03 AM]
They are such adorable little babies.
[11:03 AM]
I am literally so soft right now đ„ș
[Taehyung 11:04 AM]
Haha Iâm glad itâs going well.
[Taehyung 11:04 AM]
Donât get too comfortable, though.
[Taehyung 11:05 AM]
I miss you and I want you back here with me.
[11:05 AM]
You miss me, huh?
[Taehyung 11:05 AM]
I do.
[Taehyung 11:06 AM]
I miss the way you run your hands through my hair when youâre using the flat iron.
[Taehyung 11:06 AM]
And the way you part your lips just a little bit when youâre putting on my makeup.
[Taehyung 11:07 AM]
And the way you tilt your head to the side ever-so-slightly when youâre shamelessly checking me out đ
[11:07 AM]
Youâre a little too cocky for your own good, you know that?
[11:08 AM]
I think Iâm going to ditch you and start secretly dating Beomgyu just to spite you.
[Taehyung 11:08 AM]
Noooo donât leave me, sweetheart.
[Taehyung 11:08 AM]
đđđ
[Taehyung 11:08 AM]
Iâll be a good boy.
[11:09 AM]
You promise?
[Taehyung 11:09 AM]
I promise.
[Taehyung 11:09 AM]
I wonât make any more jokes about how thirsty you are.
[11:10 AM]
đ
[11:10 AM]
Youâre dead to me, Kim Taehyung.
[Taehyung 11:10 AM]
IâM SORRY.
[Taehyung 11:11 AM]
Iâm serious now. No more jokes.
[Taehyung 11:11 AM]
How about I tell you how thirsty I am to make it up to you?
[Taehyung 11:11 AM]
Iâll tell you all the filthy, unprofessional thoughts I had about you in the shower this morning...
[11:12 AM]
âŠ
[11:12 AM]
You may proceed.
After Tae divulged his naughty shower fantasy in deliciously explicit detail, the two of you spent the rest of the day sending scandalous messages back and forth. It wasnât full-on sexting, but it was still pretty risquĂ©, especially considering you were not just working, but in the Big Hit building itself. The fact that you hadnât been together in almost a week made it all the more exciting and had you absolutely itching to finally get your hands on him later that night.
You did feel slightly guilty reading and writing such filthy things while in the presence of your precious TXT babies, but you loved the idea of Tae doing so while he was with Jisoo. As you had predicted, she was all over him while everyone was together in the big room where the photos were being taken. After watching him basically ignore her all week, it was a little hard to watch him slip back into the role of her doting boyfriend while they were talking to Bang PD, but you knew he was just trying to put on a show and make it look convincing. Of course, it was actually no longer necessary for him to do that given that they would be ending their ârelationshipâ shortly and you would be leaving Big Hit not long after, but he unfortunately didnât know that yet so you had no right to be frustrated.
Things were pretty hectic while the photos were being taken so you unfortunately didnât get a chance to sneak back over to the BTS team and talk to Tae. However, you did shamelessly check him out from afar and decided, in your completely unbiased opinion, that he was hands down the most attractive Big Hit idol. He looked fantastic in the outfit you had picked out for him, but you chuckled to yourself when you saw that Mrs. Choi, who was quite conservative when it came to showing skin, had made him button his shirt up all the way. Usually you left at least one or two buttons undone, although lately he had been sneakily undoing a couple more. He claimed it was because he thought ARMY would like it, but you knew he just wanted to tease you with a full view of his chest when you leaned in to do his makeup.
By the end of the day you found yourself feeling quite exhausted, but overall really happy with how everything had gone. Spending the day with TXT had been a really great experience for you, both professionally and personally. As much as you hated not being with Tae, you realized partway through the day that it was probably a good thing that you had both gotten a taste of what it was going to be like once you left Big Hit in a little over a month.
In some ways, you felt like todayâs change of plans was going to make this eveningâs conversation go more smoothly. You had proven that you could both function totally fine at work without the one another and that you could successfully stay connected throughout the day. You hoped that this would be of reassurance to Tae when he undoubtedly got upset about the fact that you wouldnât be together all the time anymore and started worrying that you wouldnât be as close.
You were definitely still a little nervous about tonight, but that was to be expected before having an incredibly emotional, life-changing conversation. After what had happened last night, though, you were actually feeling more sure than ever that it was going to go well. Although unpleasant at the time, what the two of you went through had ended up giving you a great deal of confidence in your ability to tackle the upcoming challenges together. It showed you that as long as there was communication, honesty, and accountability in your relationship, everything would be OK.
~~~
Once the shoot was officially over, you found yourself back in the TXT studio helping to clean up and put away the guysâ outfits. You were hanging Beomgyuâs clothes on the rack in the corner when Baekhyun approached you.
âThank you again for helping us out today,â he said sincerely. âWe couldnât have done it without you.â
âIt was my pleasure,â you replied back happily. âI really enjoyed working with Beomgyu.â
âThe feeling is mutual,â he said back smoothly, laughing a bit before he spoke again. âHe was quite taken with you. I overheard him telling Soobin that he wished you could stay.â
You let out a little laugh in return, blushing slightly as you then diverted your attention back to the clothes in front of you. You were definitely going to enjoy telling Tae that little bit of information.
âIâm really glad Taehyung was able to help set this up,â Baekhyun then added.
You were smiling to yourself as he said that, imagining Tae getting all riled up and jealous at the thought of Beomgyu wanting to have you as his stylist, but his comment caught your attention and pulled you from your thoughts.
âWhat do you mean âhelp set this upâ?â you asked curiously as you began buttoning up the shirt in your hands.
âOh, I assumed he told you. I ran into him in the cafĂ© this morning and we got talking about our situation,â Baekhyun said casually. âHeâs the one who came up with the idea of you transferring over to help us out.â
Upon hearing his words, your hands immediately ceased their work, your fingers tightening around the topmost button like a vice.
It was Taeâs idea for you to transfer?
âHe thought it would be fun for you to shake things up and spend a day with our boys,â he went on, blissfully unaware of the true impact of what he was saying.
âAfter he and I talked I reached out to Mrs. Choi and we made it happen,â he then continued as he made room on the rack and hung up Soobinâs outfit.
Momentarily stunned by this revelation, it took a few moments for you to remember that you needed to respond back to Baekhyun.
âOh, right. Tae did mention that before I left this morning,â you lied, giving him a smile you hoped he couldnât tell was completely fake.
âI must admit, Iâm a little surprised he let you slip away,â he said with a chuckle before adding more seriously. âBut, selfishly Iâm glad he did because we truly needed the help.â
It looked like he was about to say something else, but just as he opened his mouth one of the other stylists suddenly called out to him from the other side of the room. He thanked you again for your help, shot you another smile, and then excused himself, leaving you alone with your now very tumultuous thoughts.
Staring down at the floor dejectedly, you felt a wave of embarrassment wash over you as you thought about everything Tae had said and done today. How surprised he seemed when you told him youâd be working with TXT for the day. How he said he wished you didnât have to be the one to go. How he was worried about them liking you and wanting to keep you. How he spent all day saying that he missed you and couldnât wait for you to come back. He did and said all of those things when all along he was the reason you were sent away in the first place.
You were hurt that he did that and didnât tell you and even more hurt that he then put on that big performance when you left. At the time, him pouting and worrying about you leaving him even for a day made you feel all warm and fuzzy inside, but now it just made you feel humiliated. If he was the one to suggest that you be transferred, he obviously had no problem with you being away from him.
The fact that he then spent the rest of the day sending you flirty and suggestive text messages only made you feel worse. Just like last week when you realized he lied about where he was and then came home and slept with you, you felt betrayed and also used. Even if you hadnât done anything physical today, you had still engaged in a form of intimacy. Knowing that you had said all those things to each other while he was being dishonest with you made you feel dirty and not in a good way.
What hurt the most, though, was the fact that he did all this after everything that happened last night. Just this morning he had written you what you thought was a sincere note apologizing for hurting you and promising to try and be a better man for you. For him to then turn around just a few hours later and lie to your face made all the beautiful words in that note seem hollow.
You just didnât understand why he kept this from you or why he even did it in the first place. Your initial worry was that he was upset with you about something and wanted space, but that didnât really make sense given he spent all day talking to you. With that in mind, you tried to think of some other reasons for why he might have acted this way. Maybe he threw out the suggestion not thinking they would actually follow through with it and then felt guilty once he realized they did and decided not to say anything? Maybe he was worried you were still secretly upset about last night and thought it would be best if you two didnât work together today so things wouldnât be awkward?
Whatever the reason, it was wrong for him to have lied, especially about something that involved your job. The two of you had always been careful not to let your relationship interfere with work, but today he had definitely crossed the line and that was not OK. With a heavy heart, you added this to the ever growing list of things you and him needed to talk about tonight. Less than an hour ago you were feeling more confident than ever that your relationship was solid and everything was going to be alright, but you couldnât deny that this most recent discovery had shaken you. It just wasnât like Tae to keep secrets from you.
At least, not until recently
As you collected your things, said goodbye to the remaining members of the TXT team, and started wandering down the hall towards the elevator, you texted Tae and tried to push that unnerving thought from your mind.
[4:55 PM]
Are you heading home soon?
You hoped he was. Your anxiety regarding tonightâs conversation had skyrocketed during the last 10 minutes and you now felt an overwhelming urge to finally get everything out in the open. You had spent all week calming yourself down and trying to think rationally, and had even handled last nightâs fight with a surprising amount of poise, but right now you felt yourself slowly slipping back into a state of panic. Something about the whole TXT transfer situation just felt so off.
As you stood there leaning against the wall by the elevator waiting for him to respond, you felt that now all-too familiar sense of unease creeping back in. You could see that he had read your message and the longer it took for those three dots to appear the worse you started to feel. It was a relatively simple question, one that shouldnât take this long to answer. After waiting and waiting and waiting, you were just about to write something else when he finally responded.
[Taehyung 5:01 PM]
Sweetheart, Iâm so sorry but I just found out that me and the guys have to stay at the dorms for the rest of the weekend.
[Taehyung 5:02 PM]
Things have been kind of tense between everyone lately and Jimin and I fighting last night sent Joon-hyung into a tailspin.
[Taehyung 5:02 PM]
He wants us all to spend some time together so we can work things out before award show season starts.
[Taehyung 5:03 PM]
Iâve got plenty of clothes and stuff there so Iâm going to head straight there.
[Taehyung 5:03 PM]
Iâm sorry I wonât be there to snuggle with you tonight âčïž
[Taehyung 5:04 PM]
Call me when you get home, OK? I miss you and I want to hear your voice.
An overwhelming and unbearable sadness came over you as you read and reread his messages. Thirty minutes ago you overheard Jin talking on the phone with who you could only assume was his fiancĂ©. âThat sounds great, darling. Iâll be home in an hour or so.â, you heard him say happily into the receiver. Namjoon had clearly not requested that everyone in the group stay at the dorms tonight.
Tears welled up in your eyes as you came to the heartbreaking realization that every single word Tae just wrote to you was a lie. He wasnât going to the dorms because he had to, but because he wanted to, that is, if he was even going to the dorms at all. He wasnât actually sorry that he wasnât going to be able to snuggle with you tonight nor did he miss you or want to hear your voice. He just wanted you to think all of those things were true.
He was avoiding you, plain and simple. He didnât want to see you last night. He didnât want to see you this morning. He didnât want to see you during the shoot. He didnât want to see you now. He didnât want to see you tomorrow. He just didnât want to see you, period. This fear had crossed your mind the moment Baekhyun told you what Tae had done, but at the time you didnât want to believe it. Now, though, this fact was just too glaringly and painfully obvious to ignore.
Your head was spinning as you stepped into the empty elevator. Slumping against the far wall, you felt truly overwhelmed by how rapidly everything was falling apart. From the very beginning this fake dating nightmare, and your relationship itself, you now realized, had been a house of cards waiting to collapse. One after another after another, the secrets had piled up on top of it and their staggering weight had finally become too much to bear.
Sadly, there was not a doubt in your mind which secret had been the breaking point.
Just yesterday afternoon you had believed with all your heart that whatever Tae was secretly doing, it wasnât something that you had to worry about. You trusted that he had a totally valid reason for why he hadnât told you about it and were convinced that he would explain everything when the time was right. But right now, after realizing he had spent all day telling you lies and pushing you away, the truth could no longer be ignored.
Whatever happened last night, Tae felt guilty about it. He felt guilty and was hiding from you because of it, physically hiding from you. The best case scenario was that he was only doing that because he didnât think he could keep up the façade if he was with you in person, but the terrible, sinking feeling in your stomach told you that wasnât true.
Just as the elevator doors closed, the first few tears started rolling down your cheeks as you recalled the way he had recoiled from you last night when you went to hug him and how he had been reticent to cuddle you and the fact that he wore a shirt to bed.
He didnât want you near him.
He didnât want you to touch him.
He didnât want you to see him.
You knew at that moment that he wasnât just hiding from you, but hiding something from you, something tangible and visible, something that would tell you exactly what he had been doing last night.
âIt can't be...he wouldn't...,â you whispered to yourself as your head fell into your hands and you finally allowed your mind to wander to the darkest of places in search of an explanation.
A second later, the elevator stopped and the doors opened. Slowly raising your head, you looked up and saw none other than Jisoo standing before you. She was still in her photoshoot outfit which was a beautiful floor length halter dress in a deep shade of red. It was probably the most conservative dress youâd ever seen her wear, but she looked stunning nonetheless, elegant even.
After eyeing you up and down disdainfully, and obviously noticing your tear-stained cheeks, she stepped in beside you. The moment the doors closed and you were alone, she caught your gaze in the mirrored doors in front of you.
âYou know, I was supposed to wear something else today, but I accidentally had a little too much fun last night,â she said smugly as she tugged the neckline of her dress to the side.
There, all over her chest, trailing from her collarbone down to the swell of her breasts and no doubt beyond, were a plethora of hickeys. The sight made your already queasy stomach churn, but it was her next words that truly sickened you.
âIf you think these are bad, you should see the ones I left on him,â she cooed, feigning remorse as she threw the words you had spoken to her on Monday back in your face.
For a few heart stopping moments, your mind went completely blank as you struggled to comprehend what you were seeing and hearing, but as you gazed in horror at those red and purple bruises, the last piece of puzzle, the one that explained Taeâs evasive, mysterious behavior, finally fell into place.
Why he was upset that you were still awake last night.
Why he was so distant and cagey.
Why he wore a shirt to bed.
Why he left this morning before you could see him.
Why he didnât want you to be his stylist today.
Why his shirt was buttoned all the way up during the shoot.
Why he said he needed to stay at the dorms.
Why he literally did everything and anything within his power today to make sure you did not see him.
It was all so heartbreakingly clear now: his chest was covered with hickeys.
He cheated on you last night with Jisoo, accidentally let her leave marks, and was now hiding from you until they went away. From the moment you realized Tae was wearing a shirt to bed last night, this terrifying explanation had begun lurking in the shadows of your mind, but you had simply refused to acknowledge it. When you woke up this morning and found his heartfelt apology, you accepted it without question because you were too scared to face the truth.
âI tried to tell you, but you didnât listen,â she sneered, letting go of her dress and allowing it to conceal the evidence once more.
Every single word that left her lips was a dagger in your heart and the pain became all the more excruciating when you realized every single one was true. She did try to tell you, multiple times, and you didnât listen. Instead, you kept blindly believing the man that you knew for a fact was lying to you.
âDo yourself a favor and take that last shred of dignity you have left and leave him,â she then added, now sounding deadly serious. âLeave him before you can embarrass yourself any further by continuing to desperately cling to someone who does. not. love. you. â
With every terrible word she emphasized, your heart sank lower and lower until it was lying in a heap on the cold, lonely floor. You tried to think of something, anything to say in reply, but your mind was a dark, empty void. On Monday she had claimed he didnât want you, but you proved her wrong by getting him to sleep with you. There was a world of difference, though, between wanting someone and truly loving them. What did you have to prove this new, far more devastating claim wrong?
His empty promises? His manipulative behavior? His blatant lies?
Nothing. You had nothing.
Because the way Tae treated you today is not the way you treat someone you love.
âNow, if youâll excuse me, I need to get home,â she said casually once the elevator stopped and the doors opened. âIâm expecting company this evening.â
And with that, she strolled out into the parking garage.
It was her final insinuation, that the place where he was going to hide the marks from you was the very place where he had received them, that caused the dam inside you to finally break. All at once great, heaving sobs began tearing through your chest, shattering your heart and grinding the broken shards into nothing but dust.
People talked all the time about the âDuality of Kim Taehyungâ. They marveled at how quickly and easily he can go from being playful to serious, shy to outgoing, cute to sexy. What no one ever talked about, though, is how he can use this remarkable talent of his to manipulate those around him. One second heâs showering you with love and attention, making you swoon with his sweet words and affectionate gestures, but a second later heâs exploiting the trust youâve given him so youâll let your guard down long enough for him to use you and take from you until there is nothing left.
All day long he had manipulated you. He used flattery and gifts and grand declarations of love to distract you from his hurtful and suspicious behavior. He made you feel wanted and needed and desired so you wouldnât realize he was secretly avoiding you and pushing you away. He was so affectionate and protective that you believed your safety and happiness were his priority when in reality he had a hidden, selfish agenda. He told you exactly what you wanted to hear to distract you from the awful, gut-wrenching truth.
That all that time you spent convincing yourself that he loved you and respected you and would never hurt you, you were only lying to yourself.
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