#then again i am and have always been particular bitter and jaded towards a post that feels guilt-trippy so like

[isaacathom]

i miss when the 'get this post to x notes' stuff was about like. buying a chicken

[phoenixrisesoncemore]

I want 8, the hand-kissing, because I am in some respects extremely predictable :D

(I am shocked. Shocked, I tell you.)

8. Laying a gentle kiss to the back of the other’s hand

In the polygon of morning sunlight on the floor of jingshi, Lan Wangji is three lines.

One is a headband: straight and steady, a wall of rules made of silk, pale and hard as ice; a horizon—a divider of things—Heaven above and Earth below.

One is a guqin string: the first finger of his right hand hovers over an A as it shimmers and evaporates like morning dew, passing from the “is” into the “was.” Such is a language that can speak to the dead.

And the third… The third only Wei Wuxian has seen.

Beneath five layers of white and a sun-shaped scar, a muscle beats steady and slow. He’d dug them out of the raw earth, carved talismans right into ribs, and seen them in their natural state, rotting inside scrimshaw cages. “Keep me alive that I may kill,” he had intoned, his mouth dry with terror and thirsty for revenge as bones popped and sinew creaked and muscles moved anew.

None ever beat, less so like this one. On a mountain of corpses turned to soil, none were solid ground. None raced to look at him or pulsed when he muttered a name.

“Lan Zhan?”

Lan Wangji keeps playing but meets his gaze without hesitation. Wei Wuxian realizes he has no statement or question to follow with; none was really intended, and he fails to contrive one instantly. The thrill of knowing that he can garner Lan Wangji’s full attention with such ease is still overwhelming, and were Lan Zhan really made of thin jade, the whole world, too, could see that muscle picking up speed.

‘May I have the honor of a glimpse from you?’ He had once asked.

It has been a string of hazy early mornings and quiet afternoons since he returned to The Cloud Recesses. Overly quiet. As if something was waiting to be said.

From Wangji rises gentle pops of color: a golden A, the soft green tincture of E, the purple query of G. Sometimes they are soft as rain, sometimes they are momentary fireworks.

There is no end of notes; they spring up like weeds.

But neither had there been an end of corpses.

It was at Nightless City that he had first seen the third, the line that runs from the right hand all the way to the heart, reaching at right angles against the other two down the face of a cliff to catch him, to anchor him to the world when he did not want to stay.

“Let me go, Lan Zhan” he had said.

Now it had reached across 16 years...

“Indulge me, Lan Zhan,” he says. He rises, crosses the room, and drapes himself closer, balanced on elbow and hip, back to the guqin on its low table, and punctuates with a single spin of Chenqing.

Lan Wangji’s hands do not miss a note. “For Wei Ying, always.”

Wei Wuxian purses his lips and worries Chenqing’s tassel, twisting it around his finger. “Shizhui told me something interesting the other day.” He pauses and lets the silence sit between them for a moment. “He said that when he was younger he used to hear you playing Inquiry late at night, and that’s why he asked you to teach him: because it was ‘the saddest and most beautiful thing he had ever heard.’” He spins Chenqing again, suddenly introspective. “I don’t think of Inquiry as beautiful, but then… I suppose that would depend on who’s doing the asking… what is being asked… who it is being asked to.”

He does not need to look: he can feel the sudden and subtle electric tension. “Lan Zhan, were you—by chance—playing for me?”

He had never answered when Wei Wuxian asked about burning money, but the guqin has gone silent, so Wei Wuxian waits, the thrill of expectation rising. Then Lan Wangji plucks a solitary note: E flat.

E flat?

Yes.

Ah, so this is our game!

Wei Wuxian rolls excitedly onto his stomach in front of the dias, beaming, his hands clasping Chenqing under his chin. Lan Wangji’s gaze is demurely downcast.

“Lan Zhan, tell me the truth: did you burn money for me?”

Yes.

Wei Wuxian practically giggles with delight. “When I left this last year, did you miss me when I was gone?”

Yes.

He’s going to hurt himself grinning like this. “Did you truly miss me when I was dead?”

Yes. But the note is plucked harder than it should be and it quavers.

“But you find me so boring! Really, how long would it take you to get tired of me?” He crawls up onto his knees and plops himself into a sitting position at the table, guqin between them.

“I know I don’t have much core to speak of,” he pats his abdomen gingerly, “and I’m working on that! But let’s say we both became immortals, would you get tired of me then? 16 years is one thing, but 160? 1600? 16,000 years? Imagine how boring, Lan Zhan!?”

Lan Wangji is silent.

“Lan Zhan?” Wei Wuxian leans in close and low, trying to catch his eyes under those lashes. “May I have the honor of a glimpse from you?” Lan Wangji looks up at him, and the gaze is so intense that Wei Wuxian feels suddenly vulnerable. “What on Earth did you want to ask me back then?”

Lan Wangji is quiet for long enough that Wei Wuxian starts to think he has no intention of answering, but then...

“If the lotus seeds were ripe. If you thought the day was pleasant. If you heard the birds singing near Cold Pond, and if their song reminded you of the past. If you could forgive me for having only bitter soup for dinner. If you could see the kind young man A-Yuan was becoming. If you could divide for me the black from the white. If you knew the name of the song. But now… Wei Ying, now I think you do; I no longer need to ask that. So I will ask something else.” He swallows suddenly and Wei Wuxian could swear he’s trembling. “May I make this Wei Ying’s home? Will Wei Ying bear the early mornings and quiet hours and bitter soup and cold winters? Will Wei Ying allow me 16,000 years of Inquiry?”

Wei Wuxian is struck dumb. He sits back, slack-jawed and broken open. What can he say? How can he say…? Did he really wake this morning or is he dreaming still? He feels sloppy, wholly inadequate; his lips are clumsy things, his limbs an awkward pile of angles. How can he be worthy of the look on Lan Zhan’s face? Tears well up and surely he will combust.

But there is no end of tears. Tears spring up like weeds.

And there will be no end of corpses. But he is not a corpse. They are not. No, far from it.

Wei Wuxian fumbles with Chenqing and raises it to his lips where he plays a messy and solitary E flat. In truth it is more than that: a polyphonic note in a contrapuntal song that he’s sure only Lan Wangji can hear.

Gently, he reaches for Lan Wangji’s right hand, the one that had reached for him 16 years ago. Pale as a lily, the nails kept long to pluck the strings of his instrument, he wraps it in his fingers as delicately as he has seen Wangji handle his rabbits and brings it to his lips, and if some of his tears mar that perfect skin he has a feeling Lan Wangji won’t mind. The kiss is soft but is not the tickle of joss paper waiting for the fire; it shudders with his breath but is not the brush of a moth’s wings. It’s tender and reverent and warm with the promise of days and kisses to come and is very much—so very much—alive.

“16,000 years of Inquiry… We should get started then.”

He lays the palm of the hand against his cheek. His smile erupts without warning, and to his delight, Lan Wangji is not prepared.

“My dearest Lan Zhan, what would you like to ask me?”

———

In January gifs and meta about The Untamed started rolling across my dash. As interesting as it looked, I was determined not to watch—just no time for that. And then I saw you posting meta about it, and well… you made it sound very good, and I figure you know what you’re talking about. Add to that one particular gif you reblogged: the moment in the opening scene when LWJ’s arm, clothed in bloody white, reaches across the frame towards WWX as he falls. That was the first image of this show that really seared itself into my brain. So, I offer this with thanks for inspiring me to watch this amazing show (and with endless congratulations)!

Notes:

OK, admittedly it’s not a sun-shaped branding iron in The Untamed, but I like the sun shape better.

E flat is what “yes” sounds like to me during Inquiry in the man-eating castle, but I’m also the last person anyone should consult about music.

Still incomplete associated fanart HERE (color illustration on right).

[update: finished fanart can now he found HERE]

[cheri-translates]

[CN] Shaw’s Qixi Event (Eng Translation)

🍒 Warning: This post contains detailed spoilers for an event which has not been released in English servers! 🍒

Shaw’s Qixi Collection: Date / Call 1 / Call 2 / Event ♡ / Special Call

[ Chapter One ]

On the day of Qixi, I return home early to discover that Shaw isn’t around.

MC: Shaw? 

I take a look in the study room and the garden - places he usually goes to - but still can’t find a single trace of him.

Just when I consider whether or not to head outside to look for him, “pa da” - an empty shell of a water chestnut falls near my feet. 

MC: Eh, where did this water chestnut come from...

Shaw: Where are you looking? Raise your head.

A voice sounds from above me. I follow the voice and lift my head, realising that there seems to be something being thrown towards me from the tree.

I hurriedly take a step back, steadily catching it -- it’s another water chestnut. 

With his legs crossed, Shaw sits on the treetop, holding onto a big water chestnut. He’s currently peeling it leisurely. 

Shaw: Come up. It’s not fun to peel them on my own. 

MC: It’s such a tall tree. How am I supposed to go up?

Shaw: There’s a ladder over there. Hurry.

I can’t defy him, so I have no choice but to shift the ladder over, leaning it against the tree trunk and making my way towards him. 

When I’m left with the final two rungs, Shaw seems to be impatient at how careful I’m being. He leans forward and pulls me over.

MC: Ah...!

My exclamation is blocked by a lotus seed.

Shaw: What are you exclaiming for? The treetop is very spacious, so you won’t fall. Even if you fall, I’m here. 

MC: You always have so many reasons...

I mutter softly, biting the lotus seed open. 

The white jade flesh wraps the heart of the lotus seed, and both the sweet and bitter flavours entwine between my teeth. 

MC: Delicious! Where did you get these from? 

Shaw: The aunt from next door gave them to me. I ate half, and left the rest for you. 

As he speaks, he hands me another fresh lotus seed, which still has a few droplets of dew on it.

I mimic his actions and sit on the tree. My line of sight goes beyond the wall of the courtyard, and I happen to have a view of the Qixi fair, which is still being decorated.

Layers of trees separate us from the clamour of firecrackers, which are neither near nor far. 

The shower of rain has left behind dampness and an astringent flavour. Along with the sweet scent of red lotus plants, they exude the breath of late autumn. 

-

[ Chapter Two ] 

Shaw: What are you doing? Pounding medicine in a mortar? 

MC: I’m making nail polish. 

I tilt the small, handleless cup in Shaw’s direction. Inside, there are bright red petals. 

MC: Aren’t we participating in the Qixi evening fair later on? I want to dress up properly.

I suddenly harbour some playful thoughts, and laugh at him.

MC: Want to paint your nails too? 

Shaw: Tch, of course not. 

Despite what he says, he sits beside me, watching as I pound the petals with a pestle. 

When I’ve finished pounding the petals and am about to begin, Shaw suddenly takes the small cup away from me. 

Shaw: I’ll paint them for you.

MC: Eh? 

Shaw: I’ve never played with this before, so I want to try. 

MC: This isn’t something meant to be played with...

Even though I say this, I still hold out my hand.

Shaw’s hand is much larger than mine. When he hooks onto my fingers, my fingertips rest on his joints.

His palm is cold, but it transmits a heat belonging to summer. 

It even seems to dye my breathing with an odd warmth.. 

MC: Are... are you sure you can handle it? If you paint them badly, I’ll get even with you...

Shaw: Tch, don’t move around. 

Although he had an amused tone earlier, Shaw has an incredibly focused expression on his face now. 

His brows are slightly furrowed, as though he is carving a rare piece of art. 

My smooth and round fingernails are gradually coated with tiny bits of petals. Shaw’s hands are extremely steady, and not once does he let the sap of the flowers flow outside the nails.

Shaw: What’s next?

MC: Use the damp cloths at the side to wrap the fingers, hold them together with a thin string, then wait for them to dry. 

Shaw follows what I say. Not long after, every one of my fingers are wrapped with a layer of damp cloth. 

He sizes up the results several times, then suddenly laughs.

MC: What are you laughing at? 

Shaw: I'm laughing at how you look right now, because it makes me think of...

Because he painted my nails, he’s now extremely close to me. I can see my own reflection in his dazzling gold eyes, and a mischievous glint. 

Shaw: Dumplings. 

-

The lights shine in the night, reminiscent of an upside-down starry sky.

The temple festival in this small town is unlike the big city. There aren’t many people, but it is sufficiently lively. 

Shaw and I are taking a stroll. Occasionally, we bump into familiar faces from the neighbourhood and greet them. 

In order to attract customers, stall vendors have specially introduced “gambling” activities, and the profits from a successful gamble are clay figurines and wooden puppets. 

My interest is piqued, so I move closer to play two rounds with the vendor, and end up losing.

MC: I’m not playing anymore. The money I lost was enough to buy a small clay figurine. Let’s walk around elsewhere. 

After taking a few steps, Shaw pulls me back.

MC: What’s wrong? 

Shaw: Let me play. 

Shaw stands in front of the stall. The first thing he does is to size up the various clay figurines on sale.

Shaw: Which one did you want just now? Was it that rabbit? 

MC: Mm.

Vendor: Would you like to play too? The original price remains the same. If you buy it, it’d be ten copper pieces. If you gamble, the prize will be halved - only five copper pieces. But you have to guess if the dice is big or small. 

 [Trivia] This gamble is an ancient Chinese game of chance called sic bo (”precious dice”), which involves three dice. Players bet on the outcome of the dice roll - ‘big’ or ‘small’. The outcome is ‘small’ when the total number featured on the three dice is 10 or less, while ‘big’ is when the total number is more than 10.

Shaw: Sure, I’ll take a guess then. 

Vendor: Great!

After collecting the money, the vendor is about to shake the dice cup when Shaw suddenly grabs his hand. 

Shaw: Use your other hand to shake it. 

Vendor: You--

Shaw: Or I could tell everybody about the magnet hidden in your palm?

The vendor’s face turns red, and he angrily uses the other hand to shake the dice cup. Before he can open his mouth, Shaw answers resolutely.

Shaw: Small. Open it. 

The dice cup is lifted - it’s small. 

My wish is fulfilled as I receive the clay figurine. After leaving the stall, I remain curious about what happened earlier, and can’t help but ask.

MC: How did you know the dice would be small? Is there a trick to it? 

Shaw: There’s a trick, but... mm, I’m not telling you.

-

[ Chapter Three ]

Vendor: Lady, would you like to release wishing river lanterns? We have carp lanterns, lotus lanterns, peach lanterns... If you release a peach lantern, it will usher in a fate which brings lovers together!

MC: I’ll just buy the carp lantern.

Vendor: All right! Are you going to write your wish on the lantern and release it here? 

MC: No, I'm giving it to someone. 

I scan the crowd, then raise the lantern and wave my hand to someone across the street.

MC: I’ve bought it!

On the opposite side of the street, a little girl exclaims happily and takes the little carp lantern from my hand. 

Girl: Thank you, big sister!

MC: Be more careful next time, and don’t let break it again.

Girl: Mm!

I watch the girl run off towards her friends. Shaw, who wasn’t around when I purchased the lantern, suddenly re-appears from behind me. 

Shaw: You only bought one for her, but not for yourself? 

MC: I don’t need it. Being able to fulfil someone else’s wishes is already my Qixi wish. Where were you just now? 

Shaw: I went to release a lantern. 

MC: Eh? Where?

Shaw: Over there. 

Right after he finishes, an exclamation sounds from behind me. After that, I see everyone surging to the side of the river. 

Woman: Hurry up and look! Is that... a river lantern? 

Man: What a large river lantern! 

Curious, I turn around in response to the voices, and see a gigantic colourful boat, half the size of a person, floating along with the river currents. 

The candlelight on the colourful boat flickers. The decorative patterns on the boat feature, in meticulous detail, lifelike images of people.

But why does the young woman on the boat... resemble me? And that young man...

I am suddenly aware of something, and my heart rate speeds up abruptly. When I open my mouth to speak, I almost bite my tongue. 

MC: S-s-s-haw! This is your river lantern?!

Shaw: That’s right. 

MC: Why did you release such a huge river lantern? 

Shaw: I wanted to, so I did it. There’s no particular reason. If I really have to say...

Shaw: My wish is a great one, so I need it to be that big.

[ladybug023]

Skarlet Headcanons!!

( I write Skarlet as less power hungry then her mk11 depiction. I write her as more loyal and tragic. Also I don’t like the flirty intros she has with her adoptive father Shao Kahn because they’re gross so where not gonna do that. She is devoted to him but there’s no sexual attraction. if I write young Kitana to be bitchy it’s not because I don’t like her it’s because she most likely was. She was raised in royalty with the pressure that Shao Kahn put on her. So logically she’d unconsciously take this out on Skarlet.)

First her backstory:

Skarlet was born to very poor family who couldn’t afford to take care of her. She was named Aurie by her birth parents. Since there’s no orphanages in Outworld her parents just dumped her in a city when she was 7 to fend for herself. This particular city called Oredon was known for known for it’s bad reputation. It was like New York but less advanced and much worse.

To survive she had to adapt quickly. She started hanging out with the other orphans on the streets. The older orphans would teach the younger how to steal for them. Her fellow orphans nicknamed her Skarlet because of her unique red hair and eyes. It stuck so much she never went by her birth name again. She had to learn how to fight for everything she had or wanted. She became a very talented little theif. She was able to use people’s underestimation of her to her advantage. Although sometimes she would get caught and be beaten severely. Pain and hunger became common feelings for her and remain that way for most of her life.

Her days on the streets would end though when she was 13 and she came into contact with the great Shao Kahn. He was marching through the city one day in his expensive horse drawn carriage on his way to his palace. His gaurds of course all around him.

The carriage stopped because their was a traffic jam ahead. That’s when Skarlet noticed a small loose diamond on the spoke of one of the wheels. She and two of her friends devised that if they could steal that diamond while the guards were distracted clearing the traffic and slip away without being noticed, they could then sell the diamond and get enough money to last her for a couple months. It was was a verryyy risky plan but they was desperate and hungry enough to try.

Alas, they got caught. A guard grabbed her and her two friends and started screaming at her. Shao Kahn saw the children from his window. He noticed Skarlet’s blood red hair first and then noticed how hard she was fighting against the guard. Such ferocity intrigued the Kahn. Shao Kahn stepped out of the carriage and stopped the guard from striking the little girl down. He then turned to her and ask:

Shao Kahn: “What is your name child?”

Skarlet: “Everyone calls me Skarlet.”

Shao Kahn: “I am assuming that is because of your hair?”

Skarlet: *wipes the blood from her nose and sniffs* “I guess.”

Shao Kahn: “You are quite the fighter Skarlet but tell me, why did you attempt to steal my diamond?”

Skarlet: “Because I wanted it.”

Shao Kahn chuckled. He admired her fearlessness. Her other two friends where sobbing and shaking. She had the potential to be a fearsome warrior one day. A warrior that would serve him. Shao Kahn took the diamond from the guard and crouched down in front of her. He gently opened her hand and placed the diamond into it.

Shao Kahn: “Such strength should be rewarded. Come with me and I’ll make you even stronger.”

Skarlet was shocked for a moment but then she took his offered hand. They walked back to the carriage with her tiny hand holding onto his big finger.

Once he lifted her into the carriage and shut the door he ordered the guards to kill off the other two orphans. Skarlet didn’t hear this order or see her friends deaths. She was too in awe of the expensive leather inside of the carriage. He entered into the carriage and she was whisked off to her new life.

When she met Kitana:

When they returned to Shao Kahn’s palace a 15 year old (in human years) Kitana came to greet her father. She was understandably shocked when she saw a dirty, little redheaded girl by his side.

Shao Kahn: “Kitana this is Skarlet, your new little sister.” *He gestures to her*

Kitana was still processing it all when Skarlet stepped forward and offered her hand. Instead of taking it Kitana looks at his father and says.

Kitana: “Father you can’t be serious.” *irritated*

Shao Kahn: “I am very serious. You dare question my choices daughter?” *He glares at her dangerously.*

Kitana scared of her father’s wrath, begrudgingly takes Skarlet’s hand. Kitana at this point in her life is very immature, spoiled, and arrogant. She is pushed everyday to be the flawless heir for Shao Kahn. She wants to be the best in her father’s eyes and immediately sees Skarlet as competition for his favor. Skarlet tries to befriend her new sister many times but Kitana refuses to make an effort.

She and Jade are also put off by her street rat past. They were taught since they were toddlers that the poor where lower than them. They often avoided her because of this. She would go intentionally rough on her during sparring matches and never let her win. She always reminded Skarlet that she was adopted.

This caused bitterness and hatred for Kitana to grow with in her. Skarlet became a loner and would train by herself. Shao Kahn started to teach her magic and drove her to focus on mastering it. He also introduced her to the dangerous Blood Magik. He used mental and emotional manipulation to convince her to use it of course.

As she grew into her teenage years she started turning into a stunning young woman. She began getting the attention she lacked from her adoptive family, from many lovers. This is where her flirtatious side comes from.

On a mission assigned by Shang Tsung she clashes with a cute Earthrealm boy named Tundra. (Refer to my sub zero/ skarlet post) he’s from some clan named the Lin Kuei. He’s a good fighter but she’s easily able to distract and immobilize him. She blows hims a kiss goodbye and hopes for them meet again sometime.

Shao Kahn manipulates her into taking a Blood Code at 18 (human years) saying, that it would make her even more powerful. He never told her that the ritual could kill her and the Magik would kill her very slowly.

Shao Kahn had doubts that she’d even survive the blood ritual and was surprised when she did. This ignited her hunger and addiction for blood.

Side note Skarlet was dating Erron Black a this point in time. Leaves his ass heartbroken too.

After Shao Kahn’s death:

Skarlet is devastated by his death. She feels like she had failed the one man who in her mind saved her. The one person she shares this pain with is Mileena. She hadn’t known Mileena for long before Kahn’s passing but they relate to each other in many ways. Both were loyally devoted to Kahn and both hate Kitana.

Since Mileena was the heir Shao Kahn wanted to take the throne she pledges her loyalty to her. They become very close and Skarlet gets the sister Kitana refused to be. She helps her take the throne and becomes her right hand man.

(In my AU Kotal never becomes Kahn because that’s stupid and instead Kitana and Mileena have a civil war for the throne of Outworld.)

She’s one of the very few people Mileena will actually listen too. She keeps Mileena from making rash decisions. She also protects Mileena from treachery. Tanya, Baraka, and Skarlet become the only three people Mileena trusts.

Side note: Skarlet is dating Nitara at this time. Until she dumps her a couple months later because Skarlet is a playa. Nitara defected from Mileena’s forces because of this. That’s why you don’t mix business with pleasure.

When Mileena’s forces overwhelm Kitana’s. Kitana and her forces go into temporary hiding. She reaches out to Earthrealm but Raiden is very hesitant about bringing Earthrealm into a war that they have no business being in. Despite Liu-Kang’s insistence that they help her.

Skarlet and Tanya chase off Reptile, Kotal Khan and Devorah when they find their assassination attempt against Mileena. Skarlet manages to track down and brutally kill Devorah. She brings her head to Mileena.

(Because fuck Devorah. She’s an awful and overpowered character.)

Skarlet believes with the correct guidance Mileena could be a good ruler and she wants her to be. Because beind the Blood Magik and ferociousness Skarlet does want a better Outworld. She wants a Outworld where children are safe and not starving. She believes she can accomplish this with Mileena.

She continues to fight on Mileena’s side until one day while in a battle with Kitana all the resentment towards her boils over.

While they fight she tells about all the times Kitana rejected her, made her feel like she was nothing, and that she was never a sister to her. Kitana is caught off guard by Skarlets genuine hurt. As an adult The memories of mistreating Skarlet when they were children had slipped her mind. It didn’t impact her the way it did Skarlet and Kitana realized that.

Skarlet manages to overpower her and start choking her. She stops though when Kitana apologizes to her, something she wasn’t expecting. She roughly lets go of her.

Skarlet: “I should kill you. By the gods I should bleed you out dry.”

Kitana: *rubs the bruises on her neck* “I probably would deserve it, for how I treated you.”

Skarlet: “You would deserve it!”

Kitana: “Skarlet. I should’ve been there for you. I’m sor-

Skarlet: “If you think for a second that a sappy apology is going to make me forg-

Kitana: “-I want to be there for you now. I was insecure and foolish. I tried so hard to please father everyday but it was never enough. I shouldn’t of taken that stress out on you but I did and I know I can’t take it back...” *She takes Skarlet’s hand and smiles genuinely.*

Kitana: “Allow me to make it up to you sister, please.”

*Skarlet stares at her for a couple moments with tears streaming from her eyes while contemplating is Kitana was being truthful or not.

Skarlet: “...No you’ve had your chance. The next time we cross paths, I’m putting a blade through your skull.”

*Skarlet takes her hand away, turns her back on her and walks away.*

She leaves Kitana heartbroken.

But Kitana’s apology did have an effect on her. She was honestly contemplating if she did say yes. Could she have the relationship she’d always wanted with Kitana? But that would be betraying Mileena. She becomes very conflicted with her loyalty for her two sisters.

[theseerasures]

Conspicuous Media Consumption, 2020

it’s that time of year again! *saddest toot from the party horn*

for those of you just joining us: it’s a “consume a different content every week for 48 weeks of the year” challenge. for a longer explanation, check out last year’s write-up here, and as always, feel free to pop in and ask questions about any and all of this content.

(same disclaimer as last year too: content for this project ONLY here, and not certain...*looks at my billion Sad Cop Lady posts*...hyperfixations.)

(man remember when i was big into X-Men comics earlier this year? better times than these, if only because no one's discoursing about Emma Frost’s woobie/war criminal ratio anymore--her w/w, if you will)

(...i swear at one point i didn’t exclusively like platinum blondes but alas)

Bitter Root (comic, 1 issue finished 1/1/2020): still very cool on a basic concept level, but runs into the Image Comics problem of just not having enough content to keep my interest beyond that. part of that is on me, for picking it up again BEFORE the second arc rolled out, but the first five issues didn’t really follow (or resolve) any cohesive story either, so...meh.

Immortal Hulk (comic, 3 trades finished 1/17/2020): still not gonna be something i care deeply about (maybe one of Bruce’s Hulksonas dyed his hair???), but i do want to give kudos to Al Ewing for sheer consistency in terms of sustaining this level of quality storytelling month by month for more than two years now. working with the dense archive of the Hulk mythos and managing to make it interesting and thoughtful is impressive even if i personally would not expend the same effort.

Disco Elysium (game, finished 1/18/2020): honestly i should have twigged onto what this year was gonna be like when the third thing i drew from the barrel was pure uncut Eastern European flavored depression. i faintly recall people ragging on it for being pretentiously cynical, but i actually thought its core slid more towards idealism than people give it credit for. also gratified that i haven’t heard anything about Robert Kurvitz using slave labor to finish it, which is a thing we have to say about our video games now!!! fun.

Watchmen (TV, 7 episodes finished 1/27/2020): i am a fool who wants to believe in Damon Lindelof and I WAS RIGHT!!! honestly still cannot believe that he pulled off this highwire act with such deft aplomb. might be my favorite TV this year, which is a pretty high bar given how much TV i ended up watching.

On a Sunbeam (comic, finished 2/1/2020): Tillie Walden rightly deserves all the praise for inventive queer storytelling, but i will say that on reread--since i first read this as a webcomic--there ARE some issues with pacing here that clearly come from the foibles of its original intended medium. still just excellent, even if after some plot significant haircuts i was having trouble telling a few folks apart.

Lazarus (comic, 1 trade finished 2/8/2020): it’s so good and i want moooooorrrreee--though obviously Rucka and Lark have the right to take all the time they need. the newer longer issues work really well with the epic prestige drama vibes of the story! i’m into it.

The Good Place (TV, 4 seasons finished 2/18/2020): i’m gonna be super honest: i actually wasn’t a big fan of the finale, nor the last season as a whole. it felt like all of Eleanor’s flaws vanished for a majority of the season, and the Chidi-centric episode where they tried to give a legible justification for why he’s Like This was...i didn’t care for it. still, it’s so good and unique on the WHOLE that we’ll literally never get anything like this ever again, and that counts for a lot.

The Old Republic (game, finished 2/21/2020): it’s an MMO so it will never actually Be Finished so long as the servers aren’t shut down, but i caught up on the content i’d missed in the intervening months. Onslaught thus far has mostly been...kinda bland tbh; going back to Imps vs. Rebs after all the shakeups in the previous expansions feels like a waste.

High Road (album, finished 2/22/2020): someone should tell Kesha not to say that word!! otherwise i was very happy with this album, and happy FOR her even though we don’t know each other. being able to find joy again in the same genre of music you made while you were being horrifically exploited is very cool.

Young Justice (TV, 13 episodes finished 2/28/2020): given how much the middle stuff dragged--STOP KILLING YOUR HIJABI CHARACTER IN HORRIFIC WAYS--i was...actually kinda mad by how the end managed to stick the landing anyway. the day being saved by Vic’s self-acceptance and Violet’s sublime compassion was A+, and even the Brion/Tara switchup was a pleasant surprise, though it relied on me caring about Brion MUCH MORE than i actually did.

Manic (album, finished 2/29/2020): do people still care for/about Halsey? i feel like even That One Song that was on every tumblr gifset ever has kinda faded into obscurity at this point. this album was...okay. i feel like people give Halsey a pass for extremely obvious lyrical turns that they wouldn’t for other folks because of her subject material--which is fine. not really my cup of tea, but i also listened to lots of Relient K this year, so that’s probably a good thing.

Jade Empire (game, 3/10/2020): the only 3D-era Bioware game that didn’t franchise out, and for good fucking reason!!! the Orientalism and appropriation really haven’t aged well, and even beyond that the story was...standard Bioware faire. even my usual “my wife’s a bitch i love her” Bioware type didn’t do it for me, and i just ended up romancing no one. it did make me think a lot about what level of cultural borrowing is accepted nowadays, and why: people still look fondly at Avatar and talk about how ~accurate and respectful it was, for example, despite it being staffed almost entirely by white folks, and the Orientalism ALL OVER the monk class in DND is still fine for some reason.

Alif the Unseen (book, finished 3/31/2020): interesting to have read this AFTER reading The Bird King last year, because it highlights how the intervening years have shifted G. Willow Wilson’s thematic interest and improved her craft. i’m actually quite fond of how her characterization work is rougher here--Alif is extremely flawed to the point of being insufferable, but it makes his development by the end more satisfying. Dina is also just good and i love her

Baldur’s Gate (2 games, finished 5/31/2020): well, having finally finished the series i’m happy to say that it...still doesn’t really do it for me, sorry. any awesome story moments were overshadowed by the EXCRUCIATING inventory management system and the combat (i still don’t know what a THAC0 is and at this point i’m afraid to find out). these games crucially lack the Home Base that later Bioware games were so good about, and that (coupled with the huge cast of characters you can drop off and never see again) really hurts the intimacy for me. by the time we finally did get one it was the Hell Dimension in Throne of Bhaal, and i was just...trying to get through it. (yes, i did just say that about one of the most beloved expansions ever to one of the most beloved games ever.) THIS particular iteration of “my wife’s a bitch i love her” was very good, but the game wouldn’t let me romance her :(

The Underground Railroad (book, finished 6/19/2020): honestly what is there even left to say at this point! it was exactly as good as every critic on the planet said it was, even with my usual aversion to hype. draining and horrifying in turns but still insistent upon a future for Black folks.

Steven Universe (6 seasons and a mooooooviiieeee, finished 7/11/2020): yes, i DID finish the show and almost immediately begin a rewatch. this series is now one of my top five most formative things, and the amount of love and respect i have for it is incalculable. that said: i once again did not love how the central conflict of Future was resolved (just the resolution--i loved the finale just fine). for all of Steven’s breakdown was built up, resolving it with “EVERYONE HUG HIM UNTIL HE CRIES” felt...cheap, especially since up until this point the show had been so good about treating trauma and mental illness with the respect and nuance it deserves. it made me wish some of the earlier, less substantial episodes had been cut so we could spend more time at the end.

What It Is (comic, finished 8/19/2020): y’all i love Lynda Barry SO MUCH. for the longest time i was worried that One Hundred Demons was more a lightning in a bottle situation but every book of hers i pick up makes me feel obscure emotions i didn’t even realize existed. the compassionate way she’s able to describe her child self and how weird and fucked up she was (and still is) is honestly aspirational.

She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (TV, 5 seasons finished 9/26/2020): so here’s a reversal of what i’ve been complaining about with other shows: i was mostly lukewarm-to-warm about She-Ra, but the later seasons and the finale made me much more into it as a whole. more shows should improve in stakes and overall quality as they age tbh!! i still don’t actively love Catradora (my sole quibble with season 5 actually has to do with the way Adora kept backsliding as a character to make certain Plot/Relationship things happen), but i’m very happy for them nonetheless. i can certainly appreciate a show that will go for High Feeling over tight plot. dark horse standout moments: trees growing everywhere proving that Perfuma Was Right, and Hordak and Adora seeing each other--that weirdly intimate moment of recognition.

Fetch the Bolt Cutters (album, finished 10/7/2020): again i find myself not having much to say that no one else has said. it’s good! once again love it when an artist reclaims something they’d attached with negative affect (anxiety, depression, disordered eating) for better and brighter things.

Solutions and Other Problems (comic, finished 10/25/2020): i was very into Allie Brosh’s ambition with this book, which feels weird to say but i stand by it. it’s cool to see an artist try to make a new medium work for them instead of just sticking to what already works. not all the experimentation was 100% effective, but it was still delightful and occasionally devastating to read, so.

Legend of Zelda (3 games: Ocarina of Time, Majora’s Mask, Link Between Worlds, finished 11/1/2020): this was the third time i’d played Ocarina of Time, which made it the nice, comforting groove i settled into before Majora’s Mask blatted me in the face. i’m not usually a completionist Zelda person because...the gameplay in Zelda is bad, do not at me it just is, but i really felt like i HAD to be one for Majora’s Mask since the whole point is to get attached to the banalities of the town. i’m sure nobody’s surprised that i loved it, even if it gave me an existential crisis about how life goes on in the game for NPCs when you’re not there to save them from it, and there’s not enough time to save them all all the time (also not a surprise to anyone: Romani and Cremia gave Personal Feelings). Link Between Worlds...bad. not like in a “this is a bad story by every measurable gauge” way, but i was already struggling with the 2D playstyle shift enough that for the whole story to end with some “yes it’s v sad that Lorule is Like This but trying to steal Hyrule’s privilege is Even Worse Actually” noblesse oblige bullshit left a VERY poor taste in my mouth, this year of all years. i did audibly gasp when Ravio took off his mask, though. i’m currently playing Breath of the Wild in cautious increments; it’s the first time i’ve enjoyed early Zelda gameplay, but if they wanted fully voiced cutscenes i wish they got voice actors who...knew what words sound like.

folklore (album, finished 11/6/2020): my belief that Taylor Swift is Just Fine continues, i’m afraid. i LIKED this album, don’t get me wrong, and respect her constant drive to innovate, but i didn’t love it substantially more or less than any other Taylor Swift album. mostly i’m just tickled by how she thinks leaning into the indie aesthetic means borrowing Vita Sackville-West’s entire wardrobe, though i will admit to feeling Something when she swore in a song. i think it was like. savage vindication?? you go ahead and swear, Taylor Swift. you deserve it.

Shore (album, finished 11/19/2020): do people still care about the Fleet Foxes? i think there was some Drama with Josh Tillman a while back but i don’t remember where the discourse landed with who was being more problematic. it was nostalgic for me to listen to their new album--made me remember being an undergrad who exclusively listened to men who mumbled and played acoustic guitar all over again.

Star Wars (3 movies: original trilogy, finished 11/27/2020): there is So Much bad Star Wars these days that every time i rewatch the original trilogy i’m afraid that they will suddenly be bad, but guess what! they’re not. i love these children and their hot mess stories, i love that Lando doesn’t know how to say his best friend’s name. what stood out to me this time was the way Obi-Wan described the Force in A New Hope, which strongly implied that ANYONE can be Force Sensitive; that obviously faded with each subsequent movie, but part of me does wish they’d kept it.

X of Swords (comics, 22 issues finished 12/5/2020): i am enjoying Hickman’s X-lines!!! not so much here for the Grand Conspiracy or whatever, but the character work and highkey weirdness is fabulous--they FEEL like X-Men, despite all the shakeups in-universe. this crossover is a nice microcosm of all that: grandiloquently all over the place, but still full of cool standout moments and genuine hilarity. ILLYANA DOESN’T KNOW HOW TO SPELL MAGIC.

Fire Emblem (4 games: Sacred Stones, Path of Radiance, Radiant Dawn, Awakening, finished 12/14/2020): this was the thing that i was closest to giving up early on, but i ended up hyperfixating on it instead. that’s a credit to what the gameplay does to my lizard brain more than anything else, because the story and character writing is...insipid. it was very bizarre to witness this franchise blunder around with its animal-people racism allegory around the same time i was getting back into RWBY, and ITS animal-people racism allegory blunders. Awakening was the first time i felt anything for the franchise beyond “teehee red units disappear make exp bar go up and brain go ding,” so i’m excited for more mature storytelling in subsequent games (they MUST get better. they MUST). the child husbandry thing is...very bad tho, and Apotheosis being “challenging” entirely through the game changing all the rules is also bad.

once again no vidya games that came out this year--i’ll probably pick up Spiritfarer or Hades after the New Year, though (or maybe TLOU II! but probably not. sry Laura and Ashley). more TV and franchises this year, which made me feel In Touch with the Children but was also kinda exhausting. nothing was so egregiously terrible i dropped it without finishing! in a year like this that feels almost like an accomplishment