#then maybe we will also let go of the bigotry that's attached to labeling one way or the other

[robotslenderman]

Ewww getting big privileged homophobe vibes from you. Blocking now.

Thank God.

I doubt you'll ever read this, but just in case hate-reading is your thing - I don't know why you bothered with anon. You're obviously not a follower because I talk about how queer I am here ALL THE TIME. I saw many queerphobes on that queer post, and even visited a few of their blogs. (Most of them were TERFs, except one - you, who claimed to be a trans dude. Maybe you are! Maybe you're not a TERF posing as a trans dude and you really are okay with being part of a movement absolutely dominated by TERFs!)

But there was only one that I left a comment on. You'd posted about how queer people are so horrible to call ourselves queer. Like the anthropomorphic personification of class and tact that I am, I trolled you by asking if my queer presence made you uncomfortable.

Clearly, it did. :)

So go ahead. Call me the first mean name that comes to your head, as if it bothered me what a random totally-not-anon thinks I am. I'm totally fine with queerphobes thinking my existence is homophobic, because the only way they'd understand otherwise is if I pretended I wasn't queer. My alleged homophobia is latched on to my identity as a queer person. The only way you would not accuse me of being homophobic is if I stopped calling myself queer.

So you use my very identity as a weapon against me. I am queer, and I am attached to not being a homophobe. You know that queer people do not want to be perceived as something they hate completely by anyone, strangers included, especially on a website where people harass first and listen later (if at all). So you hold us hostage - deny our queerness, and you'll drop your weapon. You'll drop the word "homophobic" and stop pointing it at me.

I'm not gonna cave to this.

Nor am I going to write an outraged essay about how I'm not homophobic. You know perfectly fucking well that not a SINGLE queer person is straight. You know perfectly fucking well that most queer people are same sex attracted or attracted to enbies. You know perfectly fucking well that queer people have accepted that part of us and aren't dealing with internalised homophobia or inflicting it on other people because we ACKNOWLEDGE our queerness and you can see this, otherwise you wouldn't be getting mad about it. In a homophobic society everyone has a degree of it, but by being what we are we have less of it than the great majority.

You know this perfectly well. Don't fucking pretend otherwise, I would have to believe that you are well and truly and sincerely STUPID to think for one second that you think I'm a straight person or a closeted gay person who's lashing out with malicious homophobia. Real homophobia, not "this person is part of a minority I am bigoted against, so I will claim they are inherently homophobic unless they get back in the closet or categorise themself in a way that allows me to fine tune my bigotry appropriately."

Because let's be real. Queer hasn't been used as a slur in decades and was reclaimed before I was even born. "Gay" was the slur of the time when I was growing up, but people like you never had a problem with that. Why? Because gay is clear cut and well defined. The problem people like you have with queers like me - the REAL problem, not the faux outraged you have made up about my label - is that queer means I have declined your insistence to more accurately categorise myself.

I mean, how else would you know specifically how to treat me? I could be bi and you might hate bi people, but if I'm a gay queer you don't want to aim the wrong type of bigotry at me by mistake - not because you care about gay people (you don't, because many gay people are also queer), but because you don't want to make yourself look silly by aiming the wrong type of bigotry at me. I could be queer because I'm an enby, and maybe you're truescum that would despise me for it, but you don't KNOW whether or not I'm an enby and that drives you mad! You don't want to risk alienating people who care about you by shitting on someone they might not agree is an acceptable target, so you target every queer and claim it's about a word when really, many queer people seek refugee under that term to hide from people like you, and you don't like that we can hide from you, so you try to strip our shelter away from us.

(And let's be honest. You probably don't even actually hate us. You're probably just afraid. Afraid of some identity you don't really understand because you've never taken the time to get to know us, or afraid that society will accept you less if we're "competing" for acceptance and so take some of the spotlight... I won't shit on you for fear, anon. We are all afraid of something. But I absolutely have a problem with how you're choosing to knowingly hurt people to cope with it. You called me "homophobe" to hurt me. There was no other way to possibly interpret the context of what you were saying. You meant to do this.)

So take away queer. Take away the shelter of queer. Force every queer person to divulge, upfront, who they are that makes them friends with queer. Force them out of the closet and pretend THAT'S not homophobic.

Send the gay queers back to the L and G of LGBT, let the TERFs flush out the trans people who are queer because they're trans* and shoo them away from LGBTQ spaces. Or maybe you really are trans, but you want to kick out straight trans people, or enbies, or pan people, or bi people, or ace people, or, one of the many populations that make up the true queer community.

* Not all trans people are queer, but many are BECAUSE they're trans. I would say "many are queer because they identify as queer" because that makes it sound like queerness isn't an inherent part of who we are and gives people like you ammo I have no interest in supplying you with. "Aha! So you CHOOSE to be a slur!" I just know you'd completely ignore everything I said to the contrary and say that.

Yes. The true queer community.

We've told you again and again that we're not calling you queer. We've told you again and again, if you're not queer, you're not part of the queer community. You're LGBT+, not queer. I'm not part of the LGBT+ community, I'm part of the queer community.

The queer community is not the true community of people who aren't straight and cis, that's not what I'm saying. We're not any more or less LGBT+ than you. I'm not invalidating the identities of people who aren't straight and/or cis, because they are who they are, and you don't need to be queer to be LGBT+. But we are the true queer community in that we are queer, and people who are LGBT+ but are not queer are not queer. Only queer people are queer.

("But people use queer community as an umbrella term to mean people who aren't queer, but are still LGBT+!" Buddy, if I have to deal with being called LGBT all the time even though it's not true, while having the people who use LGBT obviously mean me too because I'm not straight, then you can live with it too. That's mostly straights doing that, in which case you have no reason to get mad at US, or people who are are making something for a straight audience or a questioning audience, in which case they're making it accessible because not everyone knows the nuance of queer and LGBTALPHABETSOUP discourse. Or even - and I know this thought is incomprehensible to you, as the centre of the universe - it's actually referring to queer people and queer people only, not LGBT+ who aren't queer. Actually, I love that idea! Queer history is now history of queer people, no non-queer LGBT+ allowed :D)

I've never felt LGBT+ even when I thought I was one of the main four letters. But I've always felt queer, even as my understanding of my specific brand of queerness changed. Queer is an umbrella term that is opt in, that covers any and all LGBT+ people who know they are queer too, who know they're one of us, or who simply choose to call themselves queer for whatever fucking reason they want. Some of us are intrinsically queer, some choose to be queer because of the inclusiveness or relative opacity of the term, and you don't know which one a queer person is unless you have earned our trust enough for us to tell you.

And people like you fucking hate that.

So you know what?

I'm totally fine with you calling me a homophobe because the people who actually know more about me than the few sentences I've given you know that that's a joke, and their good opinion matters more to me than yours.

I'm totally fine with you calling me a homophobe because because it means I've won. I've gotten under your skin, just as your bigotry got right under mine. You're furious you can't categorise me. You're pissed off that I could be one of the LGBT+ people you actively dislike and want out of the LGBT+ community, but are finding a hell of a lot harder to flush out of the queer community because we all look the same at first glance and refuse to give you information you feel entitled to. Because it's easy to force people out of the closet in the LGBT+ community, but much fucking harder in a meritocracy like the queer community. To get into the LGBT+ community, you have to tell them which one you are. Queer? No questions asked, cause you already told us all we needed to know! Welcome home!

But let's say this is all a strawman.

That you really are some well meaning person who has nothing against the more obscure queer identities and that you really do just have a problem with the word. That you truly do think that queer people, the great majority of which experience same sex attraction, are... somehow... homophobic just for using the word despite their advocacy against homophobia and total acceptance of that aspect of themselves and others. That our fight for marriage equality and employment and housing protections and human rights is rendered COMPLETELY AND UTTERLY IRRELEVANT because we used a word that Boomers and even some of gen X hurled at each other because a guy was a little bit girly, or a girl refused to grow her hair long, or because men were scared that a man would treat them the way they treated women. (Because queer as an archaic slur, ultimately, comes from misogyny as much as homophobia.)

Let's say you really do mean well and really do know people who were called queers instead of fags, or you really did grow up hearing "that is so queer" to describe things people didn't like, or you really did have "queer" hurled at you by straight people as if there was something wrong with you for not being cis and straight.

(Notice something, there? You probably haven't actually experienced any of that, nor anyone you know. This wank about who I am as a queer person - it's always aimed at us. Never the straights that used it against us. Nobody uses the word queer except queer people any more, I am 99% certain that you don't know ANYBODY who has had it thrown at them AS a slur, so that means that the only people you can target on your crusade are... gender and sexual minorities. Not cis/straight people. Because they're not calling us queers and haven't in decades.

That means you are knowingly targeting minorities over this EXCLUSIVELY, I am completely fucking certain..

... but I'M the homophobe?)

In which case all I can say is: I hope that the well-meaningness that's made you put this hateful thing into my inbox, that's made you say such hateful things to a minority because of their identity (there's a word for treating people differently because they're a minority, especially hostile treatment..), will outshine the hatefulness of what you're saying and lead you to a better way to express your desire to protect people.

If you truly are coming from a misplaced belief that we're somehow deprecating ourselves by being queer, and not a desire to force us out of the closet or to run off any gender or sexual minority, then I apologise for my hostility, acknowledge that learning takes time (and patience that I am unable to give, for I am tired of bad actors pretending they're not and cannot do it), and wish you the best in learning to be inclusive and loving so we can count you one day, at least, as a friend of us queer folk. Maybe one day we'll even welcome you as one of us. I'd love to do that more than I'd like to deal with THIS crap. I can't imagine me going off on you will have helped at all, but from in my experience people who want to protect gender and sexual minorities protect them. They don't target them. That's why I am writing this post under the assumption that you wrote this because you have bad intentions towards me as a queer person, and not out of a well meaning desire to protect anyone you think I've somehow hurt by being me.

In which case? Get fucked.

[redorblue]

The ministry of utmost happiness, by Arundhati Roy

I’ve talked about this book with my book club, and I’ve heard from a lot of people that this book is hard to get into. On the one hand, I understand - if you’re not familiar with the setting and the Urdu vocabulary (like me) it can get confusing, and the amount of names and places and people doesn’t help. But as I’ve been emphatically telling all those people: it is so, so worth it. Yes, it can feel overwhelming sometimes, but you’ll be rewarded with stories (intentional plural) that are as beautiful as they’re heartbreaking, with characters that feel alive and enigmatic at the same time, and (probably) with a whole new picture of modern day India. You obviously can’t expect to learn everything there is to know about a country and a people as big as that from one book - and a fictional one at that - but it provided me with a whole lot of starting points to do my own research. Plus, it’s one of those rare books that leave me with wide eyes and more emotions than my shriveled heart can deal with, so excuse my enthusiasm - both intellectual and emotional.

One of the complaints I’ve heard about this book from people who have actually made it through the first ten pages is that the narrative structure is confusing. Again, yes, I see your point, but I think there’s a reason why the story is so episodic, with narrators appearing out of the blue and mentioning people and events that only get explained much later. Somewhere towards the end of the book (in my paperback version it’s on page 436) Tilo writes a poem that in my opinion is the key to understanding the fractured nature of the book:

“How to tell a shattered story? By slowly becoming everybody. No. By slowly becoming everything.”

The book isn’t coherent in the conventional, easily detectable sense of the word because the story isn’t. It can’t be, what with all the different conflicts and catastrophes and bigotry that it sometimes barely touches upon and sometimes elaborates a bit more. In fiction, we’re used to the characters having smaller social circles than we do: less family, less friends, rarely colleagues, barely any of the everyday acquaintances that most of us just have, without knowing where exactly they came from or any intention of deepening them. One of the three focal characters in this book is a bit like that (although that’s intentional and meant to make a point about her personality), but the other two, to whom belong the most confusing parts of the book have the huge social circle that comes with living in one place for a long time, especially when one of them has a rather colorful personality. Point is, it’s normal that seen from the outside, people’s lives aren’t coherent or easily understandable because they’re suffused with context that doesn’t always get an explanation when it’s handy because sometimes there isn’t one, or it leads to another story that leads to another that leads to yet another... Because in the end, no one is an island, we’re just not used to seeing it in fiction.

The same goes for the conflicts that are touched upon here. There’s rarely an easy explanation or black-and-white sides to be taken (which is not to say that the book doesn’t take sides, because it clearly does, but it shines a light on different views on an issue), and if real-life conflicts don’t work that way, why should a literary representation of one be any different? If you give it enough time to affect enough people, it automatically becomes a “shattered story”, and the only way to make any sense of it at all is by allowing the narrative to adapt to that - to become fractured and messy and told from the eyes of people who come with their own lifestory and everything that entails. Long story short, I think the structure of the book makes a necessary point about the story it tells, adds to its lifelikeness and doesn’t even need to be that confusing - you just have to let it unfold in front of your eyes without getting hung up on every single name you don’t recognize.

Another complaint I’ve heard is that the characters are not relatable, or that they don’t feel like fully developed human beings, and here’s where my sympathy stops. It’s true that there’s rarely any interior monologue or other kind of explanation that explicitly tells you why has done this or said that, but I don’t think it needs to. Through pretty neutral accounts of events and backstory it gives you enough clues to at least make educated guesses (otherwise known as interpretation) about a character’s choices, and to deduct important tenets of their personality. It might not be as satisfying sometimes because you never get the ultimate proof that you guessed right, but where’s the fun in having it all served to you on a silver platter? I think that’s exactly the reason why so many people don’t like main characters - you’re too deep inside their heads, too aware of their logical flaws and mental loops and repetitive insecurities. It’s much more fun if the author leaves a bit of space for the readers to fill in thought processes, and Arundhati Roy leaves a lot of space for that. There’s a lot to unpack here, and I’d love to write about so many of the characters in there, but this has already gotten longer than I thought, so I’ll only talk about my two favourites, Musa and Tilo.

I feel like I have a better grasp on Musa’s character (and also, I fell for him. Hard.), so I’ll start with him. On the surface, his life appears to be nothing but a  string of tragedies, with him as a simple vehicle that the author uses to tell us about how fucked up the situation in Kashmir is. After all, he was pretty much forced into the underground after Amrik Singh made him his newest source of entertainment, and “underground” in this context means that he’ll have to join the rebellion. But I think that is a very superficial view on his character. For me, the two defining aspects of his personality are his sense of justice and his bond to the people and the valley of Kashmir. Sure, he could have fled to some faraway place in India, or elsewhere, kept his head down and hoped that Amrik Singh’s network doesn’t stretch that far. That wouldn’t have been easy, but theoretically doable. In reality, however, going someplace else wasn’t really an option. He’s tried that already with studying in Delhi, and even though he obviously knew how bad the situation was back home, he still chose to return after he graduated because he doesn’t want to live anywhere else. He loves Kashmir and his people with all his heart. So the underground it is - because he can’t bear the injustices done to them, because he owes it to his daughter to be brave, because he can’t run away from his grief and this might be the only way to work through it.

And it takes a toll on him, of course it does. It’s heartbreaking how both he and Tilo remark on how he has become less substantial (smudged, as Tilo calls it) than he used to be, which is such an on-point metaphor for what being in a war (and a pretty hopeless guerilla war at that) does to a person. But in his thought processes and his interactions with Tilo (and briefly with Garson Hobart - I can’t remember his real name for the life of me) show that he’s - maybe not the same person as before, but a person, a complete human being, which is a lot more that what you usually get. I mean, let’s face it: he’s a Muslim in a rebel organisation, which is more than enough to get you labels such as terrorist, fanatic, extremist etc. I was a bit afraid that someone in my book club would call him that, because my reaction would have probably got me banned from the book shop. There are so many instances where you can see how kind a heart he has, how intelligent he is, how caring - and yes, also how much he suffers from seeing his people suffer and how he puts everything he has into make it right, but what’s important here is that it’s not his only defining feature.

(This is the point where I realised that this post was definitely going to be too long. So I split it, with more in-depth analysis of Musa - or rather getting my feelings for him off my chest - here.)

Tilo, on the other hand, is not as easy to grasp because she is presented to the reader as she presents herself to the world - stoic, not exactly talkative, very hard to reach. A lot of that has got to do with how she grew up, in an environment heavily influenced by racism, classism and prudery where her mother felt like the only way she could raise her daughter was to pretend they weren’t biologically related and then adopting her. I guess you could say that such an arrangement is better than growing up in an orphanage, and it could have been a lot less damaging if her mother wasn’t so very concerned about her public image, or so demanding, controlling and condescending. But she was, and the effect that had on Tilo is obvious - she’s someone who “lives in a country of her own skin”, the borders (seemingly) closed off. It’s not that she can’t care for people; it’s obvious that she’s loved Musa for a long time, and that she came to care deeply for Naga and Dr. Azad Bhartiya, even before she adopts Miss Jebeen the Second and moves in with Anjum. Rather, her issue seems to be that she has trouble accepting other people’s feelings towards her and getting attached to anyone. It’s why, for example, her marriage to Naga didn’t work (who, on a sidenote, really got treated unfairly in Garson Hobart’s POV), why she didn’t want to go through with the pregnancy when she came back from Kashmir, or why she didn’t even break things off properly with Naga and just... floated out of his life. To be fair, his family’s racism towards her didn’t help either because I’m pretty sure it stung her more than she let on, but her behaviour fits her overall pattern in interacting with people, so I don’t think that was the main issue.

It’s probably also why her post-university relationship with Musa works so well. They’re both aren’t controlling people, they trust that the other would never hurt them intentionally and they know that their communication works well enough that long-time separation doesn’t shake the foundations of their relationship. It’s a very unique bond they share, one that doesn’t go away from one of them marrying someone else and sleeping with them, even loving them, as Musa did with his wive Arifa. They know what they have, wherever they live and whatever they do. That’s another aspect I loved about the book: it never pits the two women in Musa’s life, Arifa and Tilo, against each other. Not even Tilo is jealous when she learns of Arifa’s existence, she simply trusts that if Musa loved Arifa, Arifa must have been a remarkable person. This is a testament to Tilo’s magnanimity - just because you have attachment issues yourself doesn’t mean that you’d automatically be okay with the person you love starting a family with someone else.

But Tilo knows that she’s not that person (at least not at that point), and although she worries a lot about Musa, she knows that a conventional happily ever after wouldn’t work for them. On the one hand because Musa is so tied up in Kashmir’s struggle for independence - which Tilo wholeheartedly supports - that she would never ask him to give it all up to live a life of safety with her (another thing about Tilo I deeply appreciate). But on the other hand I’m pretty sure it also wouldn’t work for Tilo herself. She’s too aimless, too far away to go through with the whole getting married, settling down, having kids etc. shtick. She needs this kind of open relationship that leaves her her space, that gives her a kind of attachment she can bear. It’s mainly emotional, and the few times a year it gets physical, as in being in the same room, it happens mostly because she decided to come back to Kashmir, with the exception of the few times Musa comes to Delhi. I do think that from her side, things might have been different if Musa had lived longer (after Tilo adopts the baby and moves in with Anjum), but on his side things would still have been the same, and I firmly believe that she’d have stayed true to herself and not asked him to walk away from his cause for her.

Which leads me to the question that has made me reread almost the entire book as soon as I was done the first time: Why did Tilo and Musa break up after university? It’s never said explicitly, but I’m pretty sure that he asked her to marry him, in all probability also to come back to Kashmir with him, and she said no and that was that. I still haven’t found an answer in the text (see, this is what I mean by interpretation being both fun and frustrating), but I have a theory. I think that his belonging, his rootedness in a family, a people and a region, was too much for her, who has never been made to feel like she belonged anywhere, was accepted and appreciated anywhere. In that situation, it wasn’t enough that she loved him and he loved and accepted and appreciated her, because in real life, the love of one man doesn’t magically fix every single one of your issues, even if it is the love of your life. So she refused him. And he, honorable person that he is, didn’t press the issue, stayed true to himself and went back to Kashmir. Where they met again years later, under unimaginably sad circumstances, to rekindle, in their own way, one of my all time favourite fictional romantic relationships.

[randomnoteforfuturereference]

Aftermath: Business Dealings

This has been an idea I’ve been mulling over for some time due to thoughts about Nursey’s family and how they’d react to a potential public coming out for Jack. 1800 words and takes place during episode 3.26. In any case, thanks to my ‘swawesome beta @kleeklutch, and I hope you enjoy.

Now has a companion piece that takes place in Maine.

“Thank you for making time on such short notice and during what must be a busy time for you.”

Mama’s words accompany a slow stirring of her tea as the morning rays reflected by the Financial District skyline bathe her in dappled light.

Opposite us, via projection on the drop-down screen, sits Georgia Martin in what I suppose is her office with Providence Harbor as the backdrop. “Don’t worry about it, Dr. Nurse,” she replies with a grin. “It’s a welcome change in pace from the reporters.”

Mama gives a smile of her own over her cup. “No doubt. In any case let me first congratulate you and your team on an amazing and well-earned victory. That was quite a nail-biter the whole way through.”

“Thanks. I have to say that we’re still running on that high.” 

It’s probably all they’re running on. That and coffee. Many probably can’t tell at a first glance, but I’ve been around enough power players to know that she’s probably keeping it all together by sheer will.

“Yes, you could imagine how ecstatic my son was at seeing his old captain make the winning shot. In overtime at that.”

Martin’s eyes aim in my direction. Pretty sure that she’s still wondering what a college kid is doing sitting next to his mother during a meeting of this magnitude. “’Nursey’, right?” she asks. “Number Twenty-eight? That was an impressive slapshot in your last game against Harvard. Amazing synchronization with Twenty-four as well; you two make quite the pair.”

I almost choke on my drink. “Thanks, ma’am.”

“Jack never hesitates to share highlights from Samwell with us.” Somehow, that doesn’t surprise me. It would surprise me even less if ninety percent of the highlights involve Bitty.

“We’re quite proud of him,” Mama adds with a smirk. “But you know that just gushing over player performance is not why I called.”

Martin leans back and apprises both of us before putting all of her focus back on Mama. “You’re interested in sponsoring.”

“Or a partnership. Whichever is going to be a more effective use of our resources.”

“Well, I can’t say I’d mind. We’ve had people and companies lining up ever since we went to the playoffs,” she explains before blinking owlishly at us. “But that isn’t the case with your offer, is it.”

“You are correct,” Mama affirms while setting her cup down. “I’m not interested in any offer going into salaries or sports equipment. Overall, it was about the game, I’d have sponsored the Rangers a long time ago. They have history after all.”

“And are the home team,” Martin adds wryly.

That’s dismissed with an airy wave. “Yes, New York is my home and where we are headquartered, but we’re also not bound to a single metropolitan area… or nation for that matter. Some will throw a fuss in regards to us supporting an out-of-town team… but, well, it’s not like this company is a stranger to protests.”

“Hashtag ‘fight the power’…” I mutter under my breath while forcibly keeping my eyes from rolling.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m the first to criticize Mama for her business and r&d practices, but sometimes the vitriol put forward by others are downright ridiculous. That many of those protesters are hyper-privileged white dudes — “kale-munching, latte-guzzling tankies” as a certain ginger loves to say; to his credit, he stopped associating me with them before the end of our first semester — makes their motives all the more suspicious.

If Martin hears me, she shows no sign. “So why are you interested in us?”

Mama simply taps on her tablet to bring a single video up to view. The video is of Jack and Bitty kissing on the center ice; their full attention focused on each other despite being surrounded by strangers and the media.

In the wake of the game’s end, I was infected by the high of the win and dancing with glee. The moment I saw the two embrace however, surprise overtook that elation and—

Well, the details regarding me aren’t important.

What is important was the reaction from my family. Mama and Papa, despite being very hard to shock due to all they’ve witnessed and dealt within the boardroom and courtroom respectively, gaped wide-eyed at the screen. Even Sis, who never ceases to have a sarcastic quip regarding professional sports, was at a complete loss for words.

When they turned their stares towards me, I knew what the unsaid question was. Pretty sure they were legit impressed that we all managed to keep the secret for over half-a-year; not sure if I should be pleased or miffed at that.

In any case, the SMH group chat is still on fire. And it’s not all cheers.

Dex and Chowder, being the rays of sunshine that they are — okay, Chowder is a ray of sunshine a good chunk of the time; though many forget that sunlight burns — have already considered this old news and are now discussing with the older guys strategies to head off those who wish to intrude upon our lives.

Because there is already discussion in the media about the fact that “Zimmermann’s boyfriend” — there is no small amount of entertainment watching some sports commentators struggle saying that — is going to be the first out NCAA ice hockey captain. And with that publicity, there has already been a slew of… opinions.  

“The thing is,” Mama continues, “while this is spectacular news, it in itself is not what prompted me to make the call.”

She switches the footage to show statements from Martin and the older Falconers.

As the vids are muted, Mama asks, “Is Zimmermann scheduled to appear yet?”

Martin’s face goes blank. “Jack and Eric are taking well-earned time to recompose themselves.”

Translation: the Falcs have zero clue where the two are, and it’s probably driving management insane.

Well, we’re just as in the dark.

“Completely understandable, and we wish them all the best,” Mama notes. “So, were you serious about what you said in front of the cameras? It is a risky move.”

“Maybe,” concedes Martin. Then her eyes light up with the kind of fiery passion that must have caused opponents to wet themselves while she was in skates. “But this isn’t just PR. When Jack came out to me, I told him the kind of organization that I wanted the Falcs to be. One that went beyond what should be common decency and actually towards raising the bar for the League as a whole.”

A smile graces Mama’s lips. “And that’s why I’ve expressed my interest,” she states before turning to me. “And I will admit that, beyond general morals and principles, I have a personal reason for throwing in my support.

“Derek?”

Shit, it’s my turn already? Granted, I wouldn’t be here if not for the fact that I came willingly.

Still I turn my chill up to maximum in the hope that my jitters don’t show. “I’ll say off the bat that I’m not straight. Bi… Pan… Personally I’m not attached to labels. What matters is that I’ve been out and comfortable for some time now. Helps that Samwell’s welcoming.” A breath. “Hasn’t always been the case, and even if I was interested in going pro — with no disrespect, I’m not — the nature of the League is a major sticky point. Not just about my orientation but also… you know…” I wave my hand around my face for emphasis.

I know Martin gets the point when she lets her composure slip with a grimace and says, “Yeah. I take you’ve read some of the articles focusing on Thirdy. We crack down pretty hard on such behavior at home, but some away venues are more lenient about what’s said on the ice or from the stands unless the media is breathing down their necks.”

“And the media is sometimes the problem,” I add. After Martin gives a weary nod, I get myself back on track: “I have mad respect and support for groups like You Can Play, which I know the Falcs have been active in. However, considering how many times players have been disciplined, it’s clear that speaking out against bigotry reactively can only do so much. So while I do think advocacy groups are important, teams themselves should take the initiative.

“Ever since Jack came out to the Falcs, you and his teammates have shown it’s a real possibility. You’ve been walking the walk; including by making sure his secret was secure until the kiss. And when that happened, all the statements made so far have been matter-of-fact support.

“So while I’m a fan of the Falcs because of Jack, all of this makes me think that the team is a bar setter in all the right ways.”

I might as well been swimming underwater the whole while, considering the way I end my speech with a gasp for air. Mama uses that as a point to enter back in:

“Some may think that just means there is bias affecting my decision. I counter that bias informs a lot of our decisions. In this case, is it a bad thing?” she posits. “Overall, my hope is that our involvement the Falconers isn’t just to promote greater inclusivity in professional sports, but also to start other social programs.

“And while it may be hard to tell, know that I’m not just doing this for PR points.”

If anything, Mama’s taking a risk with this as not all of her clients may approve of her activism.

“Don’t worry about that, Dr. Nurse. If I thought you were just jumping on the publicity bandwagon, I would have told you to wait with the other potential sponsors as we get our bearings straight,” assures Martin. “So let’s just say you’ve had my attention for some time.”

“Excellent! And I must say, it’s not like we don’t already have the perfect symbol for such a partnership.”

To punctuate her statement, Mama pans and zooms the cam to focus in on one of the office’s windows. As if on cue, one of our Peregrines lands on the ledge with a freshly-killed pigeon to feed her fluffy eyasses.

The sight makes Martin bark out a laugh in wide-eyed surprise and delight. “Didn’t expect that. But you’re right; they are quite appropriate. I’m sure Tater would be delighted to incorporate them into FalcTV.”

“Once we finalize this, your team will be welcome here. Which reminds me: Derek, you may go.”

I take the cue to get right up, say my farewells to the two ladies, and make my retreat out of the office. As I close the door behind me, I hear Mama’s next few words before the rest get muffled:

“So… let’s talk business…”

[decoding1432]

BRIDGES...

Melodically it might not be the strongest one in the album, & not the favourite one for many, BUT conceptually is the perfect song for single choice. Let me elaborate… Mainstream media regularly doesn’t touch subjects aside of sex, love, heartbreak & partying.

Logic stated something similar during his VMAs performance: “I just want to take a moment right now & thank you all so much for giving me a platform to talk about something that mainstream media doesn’t want to talk about…” Speaking about mental illnesses on his song “1-800-273-8255” is such a powerful, raw & real statement. If you have heard the song or watched his performance that night, don’t tell me you didn’t get chills or a lump in your throat. Now, this is an statement that has achieved a #1 on Spotify’s US Top 50 chart; got a new peak of No. 5 this week on the Hot 100, a platinum certification & continues to rise (not to mention the impact that has had on the lifeline, it’s unprecedented). Personally, I’m extremely happy that a song like such is getting that amount of success. Doesn’t mean there hasn’t been anyone that has treated this subject in the music ever before but take a look at the BB charts from these days & there is not another similar single on the market right now. The GP appreciates these songs that convey a different type of message other than the trivial ones we’re used to hear on the radio all the time.

Take a look at other very successful pop singles by female singers that have spoken about matters that don’t have anything to do with the common “mainstream-ish” ones:

Rachel Platten’s “Fight Song”… Reached double platinum on the US, & did very well on the BB lists)

Katy Perry with “Firework”… Commercially successful, reaching number 1 on the Billboard Hot 100 and the top five on 20 charts around the world. It has sold 7.1 million copies in the United States, and over 1 million in the United Kingdom.

Lady Gaga’s “Born This Way”…

[“I really can’t believe it. I’m humbled, honored and overwhelmed at the reception to ‘Born This Way’. This has been so life-changing for me. Between Billboard and the international No. 1s, and the radio numbers… I couldn’t be more blessed to have the fans I have. I knew when I wrote the song it was special, but I also knew that perhaps my fans or my label were hoping for me to deliver ‘Bad Romance the Third’ or ‘Poker Face the Third’. I wanted to do exactly the opposite.”] — Gaga talking to Billboard about the commercial reception of “Born This Way”.

These are just the first examples I could come up with, surely there are other options that I’m missing right now. My point here was to highlight how these sort of songs do great in terms of the commercial reception & sometimes even better than expected.

Back to Bridges, by making it a single the girls would totally be showing the GP a side of them, musically speaking, that they have never been given the chance to showcase. I want to believe it would get them the respect they deserve. I’m positive it would change the GP’s view on them since it’d be a total different approach. I would even dare to say that they could go viral since anything that slams Trump’s administration, rightfully does (like Miss Texas two or three days ago). Concerning stan Twitter, hopefully it would lessen the slander towards them.

I know most are begging for Lonely Night or DSYLM for the third single. Almost everyone is rooting for the powerhouse ballad that DSYLM is, don’t get me wrong this song is everything we all have ever wanted from them since “Who Are You” but the absolute best time to have gotten this song out would have been their debut as a foursome, releasing something no one would have expected nor sonically nor vocally. But we know Epic adores sabotaging them. Regarding Lonely Night, the girls are known for bops, adding another one to their hits list won’t bring a change onto their name. Here’s what I mean:

For a girlgroup that’s not taken seriously more than half of the time; that has sadly secured a solid place on the stan Twitter bandwagon hate list; & the label that loves fucking up their singles choices… just look at Down, as much as they want to sell us the idea that they all agreed with it as the debut, it’s obvious that LAND didn’t pick it. Tbh if it had actually been for them I don’t think they would have included it on the tracklist. For a band that’s been doubted since always, having a single out there climbing the top spots on the charts protesting about today’s political situation; speaking on behalf the lack of love & division reigning over society; stating about equality in general… It’s such an outstanding concept.

Four POC women basically singing in harmony a big fat fuck you to the giant Cheeto head & his regimen founded on racism & bigotry while taking over the mainstream radio it’s such an statement, I just got chills from merely thinking about it.

Apart from the fact that the GP could be very receptive of it, most importantly, it’s a much needed message that don’t even doubt for a second, Lauren, Ally, Normani & Dinah wouldn’t want to share with the world on a bigger scale. Yeah the song is out there, sure thing. But not every outsider will give themselves the chance to hear it. Many don’t even know the song exists. With a well budgeted music video (preferably that contains an actual storyline) & the adequate amount of promo it’s a song that could definitely get the recognition & appreciation it deserves.

I repeat, Epic won’t ever pull this card (I’m sure it must be true that they have already selected Sauced Up) but if the fans unite to demand this, definitely the girls won’t reject the idea & maybe we could really get them to change it EVEN if the third song is put out there by that moment. Many moves likes this have been done in the past, due to the fans’ petitions. E.g. Lady Gaga had everything prepared to promote “Ayo” & she changed it last minute to “Million Reasons”. One Direction had begun promoting “Infinity” but directioners wanted “History” instead. We could do it, we could get the label to exercise this option. Besides aren’t we told almost daily that we’re the fifth member? Just saying…

If you have made up your mind about other song for the next single, remember the other songs talk about about the trivial topics that the mainstream media consistently push. Not that there’s anything wrong with them of course, but from my POV it would just be another hit added to their brand & that’s pretty much it. Not that this last is not a big deal but imagine if they could have a hit with an anti-Trump anthem, love encouraging piece. Sounds better or is it just me?? Idk, don’t want to sound like I’m exaggerating but this could be huge for them. Plus bringing a different element into the table for a change seems persuading enough to me. By the way, the girls just said recently said in an interview that they wanted to be remember for spreading love & positivity… What a perfect opportunity to exhibit this to the GP than with Bridges.

Not convinced enough? The portion of the general public, that got to hear it already, praised it quite A LOT. (I’ll attach later some ss with tweets demonstrating this last point)

The world deserves this message. The girls have it. It’s just a matter of pushing it & spreading it a little bit more. This shouldn’t be an opportunity gone to waste. Especially if this is really their last project as Fifth Harmony. In the end it’s not the girls who got to decide this latter, it’s the label, (even if they try to sell us otherwise). Not to mention right now it’s the most fitting time. The situation in America, the world crying for love & compassion… It’s a must to get this anthem out as soon as possible. The time is now.

#MakeBridgesASingle

[matthewabapo]

Hope for humanity

Does humanity really gives a positive change to us in the future? Does humanity coherent and related on what it is going on right now such us cruelty, racism and inhumane behaviors of a particular people? So in this blog, I will try to write my understanding, knowledge and use the accurate information that I researched about the hope of humanity. But first, what is really a humanity? Well, humanity can be defined as the aspect of being a human, mean to be the unusual nature of a man or simply saying that the abstract quality that makes a living being human such as to think and analyze in a way that will lead us to be called a “human”. However, humanity plays a bigger role in our society to take care of the environment as we care for ourselves.

As a Humanities and Social Science (HUMSS) student, I need to engage and develop myself to be a socializer or a aspect of being human, which I need to be kind, care and help others whenever and wherever possible. In studying HUMSS, I have learned many things that strand focuses on, such as the study of the human behavior, anthropology, linguistic and communication. In learning them, I would be able to see the connection of the study to Humanity. Humanities are the subjects, the ideas, and the words that help us make sense of our lives and our world. The humanities is present to us the people we have never met, unusual places we have never been visited, and the objectives and ideas that may never navigated our intellectual capacity. By treating how others have reside and reflects about the living, being a human or humanity helps us determine what is dominant in our existence and what we can help to make them well and better. By attaching us with others, they end up the way to acknowledgements about what is correct and incorrect, or what is accurate inheritance in our history.

So there are several reasons of engaging humanity in order for us to have hope and to be positive in the future according to the source below; and such of these are: you bounce back better from tougher problems, regrets is not that scary, “what does not kill you makes you stronger”, sometimes terrible events makes us better people, rarely in life are you limited by your genes, you don’t need to win the lottery to be happy, helping others helps you, trusting too much is better than trusting too little, sometimes empathy beats objectivity and The most powerful goals aren’t about being perfect they’re about getting better, Get-better goals, on the other hand, are practically bulletproof. When we think about what we are doing in terms of learning and mastering, accepting that we may make some mistakes along the way, we stay motivated despite the setbacks that might occur. Research shows that a focus on getting better also enhances the experience of working, we naturally find what we do more interesting and enjoyable when we think about it in terms of progress, rather than perfection.

The humanities assists us to label the oppositions we face jointly in our families and peers, our community and as a nation. But of what is it happening right now? The racism? Violence? Is it really gives a positive change in the future? Yet we can be also be astonishingly narrow minded of each and one other. If we are completely truthful to ourselves, there is maybe least a bit of bigotry and racism deep within all of us. Fortunately, we have the ability in choosing to control and conquer such tendencies for our own wellbeing and the good of the whole society. Far away such genetic influences, our human culture forcibly influences our behavior and attitude, altering our human drives either encouraging them or conquering them further. Whether we indulge and trusting someone or frightened and incompetent them depends a lot on this civilization or culture. Modern civilization as as a whole encourages the addition of attitudes such as tolerance and respect beyond those who look alike to us, to those who we have no connection to. We strengthen and set out these values, teaching them to our children, while some religious and non religious spiritual leaders promote them in their guidance and teachings. That is because they generally lead to a greater sympathetic, mutually beneficial society. This is because we tend to accept and adopt a common position on a topic to signal that we are representation of a group, just like basketball fans wear certain colors or have tattoos to show their tribal loyalty. Even powerful and strong individuals who stand up to oppressive regimes typically have norms and shared ideals with other members of a resistance development.

According to Michele Gelfand a Cultural psychologist has manifest in what matter environmental shocks can cause societies to become tighter meaning the tendency to be loyal to the “in-group” gets stronger. Such of the group of societies are more to be expected to to show influenced in regards to outsiders and to elect authoritarian leaders. This has been noticed below past ecological threats such as disease outbreak and scarcity. Bottom most climate change scenarios we expect these warning and threats, in particular extreme weather events and food insecurity, to only get worse. The same goes for the coronavirus pandemic. While many hope such outbreaks can lead to a better world, they could do exactly the opposite. This increase allegiance to our local tribe is a defense mechanism that helped past human or ancestors groups pull together and get the better of deprivation. But it is not beneficial in a globalized world, whereas the ecological issues and our economies cut across the national boundaries. In response to global issues, xenophobic, become bigoted and reducing cooperation with other more state will only make the impacts on our own nations poor and substandard.

In January 2001 , a United Nations initiative called the Millennium Ecosystem Assessment sought to take stock of global environmental trends and, crucially, to explore how these trends might unfold in the future. One of the scenarios was called “order from strength” and represented “a regionalized and fragmented world that is concerned with security and protection. Nations see looking after their own interests as is the best defense against economic insecurity, and the movement of goods, people, and information is strongly regulated and and policed. On a big picture, the rich or let us just say the developed nations essentially in charge of for causing climate change are doing very little to address the difficulty of deficient nations. There seems to to be a lack of empathy, a disregard and and intolerance for others who were not lucky enough to be born in any kind of tribe. In response to an ecological cataclysm of their making, liberal and progressing countries simply argue about how best to put a stop to the prospective inflow of migrants. It is attainable to navigate our cultures and reconnect our minds so that xenophobia and bigotry all but vanish. As a matter of fact, working collaboratively across borderlines to get the better of global challenges of the 21st Century relies upon us doing just that.

In the end, at the societal level, we need have of plain-spoken and open debate about environmental and societal change and its the current and future human impacts, crucially and essentially, how our attitudes and values can affect other lives and livelihoods. We need public dialogue around climate-driven human migration and how we respond and answer to that as a society, authorize us to diminish the knee-jerk reaction of devaluing others.

Nevertheless, Showing and manifesting the Humanity is is a virtue associated with both selflessness and ethics obtained through human circumstances. However, The humanities should not be confused with "humanism," a specific philosophical belief, nor with "humanitarianism," the concern for charitable works and social reform. The manifestation of humanity is extremely valuable because there are many benefits in showing humanity to society and everyone around you. Humanity help our future generation while we currently manifest this virtue. Only human beings can understand the importance of humanity and it is humanity as a result of intelligence which actually gives the core essence to human existence. You will not need a hefty bank account to contribute towards humanitarian activities. Paying your domestic help fairly is also humanity. You are willing to pay thousands of bucks for for your medical check- up but when it comes to paying your employee, you want to save every penny.

manifesting humanity have a beneficial effect on the world. The world will become a better place even in your very presence, even if you were just a homage. We would make a difference to the totality of human consciousness, we will be able to create an effect, which is one of the single thing that there is such thing as the totality of human. For example you want to become a professional basketball player and then at first you might thought and say of how does it help people, but it does. You play basketball and you encourage them to strive greatness in the inner most most of their being, has an important effect and makes the world a better place. Another example is that, you want to become a military or soldier and when you thought how it helps people, simple, you want to become a soldier because you want to help and serve people, you manifest your conscious and when you manifest conscious you will possessing humanity by serving to those who needs and for that you would be able to convey kindness and love to the people. If you create through your conscious manifestation the conscious of every human who comes into in touch with whatever is that you create, but only that you speak to another person, serving to another person, you listen to them, you embody their presence and when they move away they not only feel loved but also they feel better within themselves without knowing why because the consciousness that you embody spreads out to others. So that, we need to become present, if we are present, we have the access to wisdom. Wisdom is not an IQ or analytic intelligence nor highly regarded but wisdom is an intuitive knowing that is much deeper than the intellect which moves within the realm of the polarities. Showing good intentions does not not guarantee a good outcome, the good intention can actually be have unforeseen consequences. Yet it is good to have a good intentions but we have the saying that “the road to hell is paved with your good intentions” so have good intentions but have also wisdom so that when you’re intent and does not produce ultimately the opposite of what was intended because again, in any course of action that you undertake is the the most important ingredient and is to have access to the dimensions within yourself where wisdom arises.

Moreover, the cause and effect of the state of being a human have a huge impact, it can help a lot to the environment and to the whole world even if it is cruel and undiversive. Humanity really be summed up to the to others, by helping them and give them the love and kindness. Because humanity means caring and for helping one another whenever and wherever you are. Humanity do really give a positive change in the future and it affects not only the culture and society but the ethics and the biology. And we cannot anguish of humanity, since we our ones self are human beings. Humanity do really gives a hope! There is really a hope for humanity. All in all, I am gonna end up with a quote saying “people can be very cruel and disgusting, hope for the humanity learns the meaning of love once and for all”

Sources: https://www.google.com.ph/amp/s/time.com/96731/faith-in-humanity-10-studies-to-restore-your-hope-for-the-future/%3famp=true https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20200403-how-to-overcome-racism-and-tribalismg

@queenlupitajones