#there is NO WAY people can see this and go theyre just firend

[atangledupmess]

I....am....normal about this -🍓

[beidousoneandonly]

Hobie x Reader

FNAFICC TIME EHEEUHEUEHU ok so ill start out with like neutral nothing freaky yeah im willing to take on requests!!!! and sorry if its wack english isnt my first language

You were looking at the nice sun set as you sat in the roof of your house, as you admire the nice colours of the sky hobie joins you for a bit,

You liked hobie but you werent sure he'd like you back so you didnt say anything, lately youve gotten closer to him, getting to know him more, be with him, you fell harder than ever before.

As hobie made himself comfortable next to you laying down whatching you "what are we lookng at?" he asks "dude look at the clouds they are so pretty" you say not trying to sound awkward

You wanted to be closer to hobie be more than friends but hed probably pull something like "i dont belive in labels like girlfriend or boyfriend" so you decided youd never actually confess but its hurt when you saw someone flirting with him

You look back at hobie trying not to blurt out your feelings so you looked away as hobie noticed and asked "soemthing on your mind?" "well you see theres this problem with my firend you know and i dont know how to help them" you said "well then tell me whats going on maybe i can help" you comply as you speak "well this friend of mine has a crush on her friend right, and she doesnt want to tell him because shes worried that he doesnt feel the same way and will ruin things between them." as you stop speaking you turn to look at him and he has a troubled look on his face "thats just stupid theres a high chance the friend likes her back even if he didnt like her i doubt anything would change" he spoke as you look at him and roll your eyes at his response as you climb down from the roof "what'd I say?!" hobie asks as he looks at you climbing down.

A few days go by from the day when you were on the rooftop with hobie as he tried not think about it, he had several conclusions as to your reactions but he didnt tell you about them.

after that day you prayed that hobie didnt catch on but it was too obvious.

Days later your group got invited to a house party, you werent the most fan of those but you didnt have anything to do so you decided to go with your friends for a bit and then youd leave.

As you get ready with gwen shes texting the guys if theyre already there, they reply with a image of pavitr in a water fountain, you and gwen switched looks and laughed and left for the party

You arrive and there puke outside on the grass already you contemplate whether you should return but march inside with gwen and meet up with hobie,pavitr and miles in the back

"Hey guys-" you say as you look at pavitr wet he still hasnt dried up "HAHHHHHHHHHHH" gwen wheezed her ass off as pavitr was trembling his ass off "You should defenetly change" you demand

Some time goes by as you get bored since you finished gossiping with hobie and gwen you guys were cririzing everyone at the party but now you had no one to gossip about, as you sighed this girl was going around recollecting people to play games as she asked you guys if you wanted to join so you said why not?

everyone gathered at the living room since most had left the party it wasnt crowded anymore, The girl that rounded everyone together suggested we sit in a circle as we do you notice hobie is looking at someone and you start to get jealous and sit next to him and bump into him to get his attention he raises an eyebrow at your actions, as the girl announces we play truth or dare or spin the bottle, someone suggests to combine them two

the game goes some on has to spin the bottle and has to do truth or dare as everyone agress the game starts and they spin the bottle as it lands on someone and they dare them to go home, everyone starts laughing at the cruel joke but the person seems upset either way the game continues as it lands on you and say truth, you dont want to be another joke like the previous person as they ask you who is your type, i am in blank "i dont really have a type ya know?" you try to shake it off someone yells BORING but you didnt want to make a fool out of yourself, some spins later the bottle lands on hobie

i give up LMFAOO ill continue this later im tired

[mackjlee9]

This is my honest opinion, but people have the right to complain. If people don’t like getting spammed with you answering ask from one person, then they are allowed to express that. You calling them names and making fun of them is wrong because you’re saying they can’t express themselves. No one told you that you can’t do it or that you shouldn’t do it. I’m sorry, but you weren’t being nice.

I’m so happy that you learn how to stand up for yourself and not take any bullshit, but it seems you lost any empathy and human decency along the way. You shouldn’t be so rude to people even if their rude 2 u because that doesn’t make anything any better.

I don’t care how mad you get over this, but you have to realize that, yes, this is your blog, and you can do whatever you want, but people are going through things behind the screens, and sometimes don’t mean things to come out the way they type them. I was the anonymous person who originally sent in that ask about the two many ask at once, and spamming my notifications thing.

I was going through some stuff and I was really annoyed. The way you reacted to me honestly hurt my feelings because it was so uncalled for. All I did was express how annoying it is to send so many ask about one conversation when you could send it at once. To be honest, you’re turning into such a bully. All I want it was not to be spammed with notifications, and you decided to call me so many names. I could try to be mean to you and say some shit that’s out of pocket and could really hurt your feelings, but I don’t want to because I’m not that kind of person. You really need to think about how you speak to people. I understand that I made a mistake, expressing my feelings to you because you obviously don’t care about anyone but yourself, but you could’ve been a little bit nicer about it.

Do you realize that people don’t have perfect lives behind the screen. Not just you. So the fact that you think that you could just cheat anybody any certain way because this is your blog and you can do whatever you want and you’re behind the screen, it’s just disheartening. I had come back to apologize, but now I don’t want to because of how you responded. I was the other person that sent in that ass saying don’t mind me, not anybody else, because I felt embarrassed about how I acted. I am no longer embarrassed, but I am upset because of the way you treated me simply because I have the right to complain and you don’t wanna see it.

Sometimes I wonder how that Seokie person puts up with you. At first, I saw it. You were a sweet person, but now you’ve changed.

I don’t remember of the ask I sent, but I know I didn’t insult him. All I did was comment on how annoying it was this in so many fucking ask about one topic when you could send it all at once and you decide to say all that shit about me. I would ask how do you think that Seokie person would react to you saying so messed up shit about an anonymous person who only complained about something that they have the right to complain about, but you probably wouldn’t care about how they felt either

To be honest, I’m done. If you want to be the reason, I end it all then, so be it. I had an extremely rough day yesterday, and I was so close to hurting myself, and all I wanted was not to be spammed because I wasn’t feeling well, but it seems like you don’t care how people are feeling. You don’t ask for context and you don’t care, so I guess this is goodbye because I am over it. I don’t care if you think I’m lying or trying to guilt trip you, because I know I’m being honest. You, quite literally, would are my 13th reason and this is not a joke.

i'm sorry.

But i'm just tired of people telling who i should or shouldn't talk to, no one thinks whether what they send me is gonna upset me at all, and then theyre suprised because of the way i answered them. i also have stuff going on in my life, youre not the only one whos is suicidal. Sometimes i just want to have fun and chat with my firends, what so wrong about that?

Your ask did make me upset, you said that you liked it better before that anon started talking to me, and specifically said that you dont care how i answer your ask and how nothing i or my moots could say would change your mind, so you soming here and saying this makes me question stuff.

i do not want you to hurt yourself, that was never my intention, but i was mad, i still am actually. and if you or anyone else wants to complain about my decision of words and questionable actions, then go ahead, im tired of pretending to be the "nice and sweet Leon" everyone thinks i am, i've said plenty of times that im not a good person, but no one fucks believes me, and here you have me.

i've been lucky to be surrounded by people who stand up for me and trust me, but they shouldn't, and if this makes them hate me, then i deserve it.

i've turned anons asks off, so if you or anyone else wants to say something to me, then go ahead, so i know who you are

[i-dont-want-to-forget-this]

hi i just wanted to talk

i dont really have any sort of direction or reason that i wanted to talk but its 9:30pm and im alone and im in a typey mood and i dont want to just watch more how i met your mother. (im on episode like 17 i was on like 2 this morning thats so embarrassing.) anyways. i should probably watch a disney movie to help fuel the reigniting fire inside of me, but idk it just hasnt happened yet. oh im waking up at like 6am tomorrow morning rip me amiright or amiright. obviously relationships have been on my mind a lot lately. theyre hard. honestly, i know that once one of radk starts dating someone im going to feel the need to be a know it all (WHICH IS SO ANNOYING SUCH A BIG FLAW I HAVE) and be like ok but dont believe all the sweet things they say because boys lie!!!!!!!!! which is true. lets be honest here they do. they say very very sweet things to win over your heart because they want you and they know that saying those things will make you swoon. and it sucks because it will work and youll believe what theyre saying, hell, they may believe what theyre saying at the time but surprise things change sometimes. and thats ok. the world is constantly changing. it jsut reallt really really really sucks when soemthing you thought could be a constant is not. FOR EXAMPLE:::::

1. “camille, listening to you is infinitely more important than this right now,”

which, in his defense, wasn’t a lie. he said right now. but thats not the point the point is that i could have sworn phil laplante would listen to everything. every complaint every hope every dream every belief everything. but we are about to hit 4 months (oh my gosh only 4 months) and i cannot tell you the last time i truly felt listened to by him. which hurts my heart does not hurt my heart as much as:

2. “i love you my dearest, kaibigan, unconditionally.”

i just literally dont believe you. i dont. and heres the thing. tears shed over phil suck/ed. ok. theuy stunk before im sure theyll stink in the future, and it hurts and it sucks but OH ME OH MY IT IS NOTHING. NOTHING IN COMPARISON. TO THE PAIN INFLICTED ON MY BY ONE OF THE LOVES OF MY LIFE. i feel like shes not even mine anymore. is this a dramatized version of camille speaking? probably, but she deserves to have a say too. and it sucks. so much. to feel like youre all alone because the one person you swore would love you no matter hwat you did or what you coujld do would still love you just kind of stops becasue she finds new firends to become obsessed with this sucks because i used to be that new friend. she used to be obsessed with me and thar hurts likea  mother tucker. i think ive developed shades of trust isseus. maybe. id ont really know i jus tknow that it sucks SO MUCH to think of my two favorite people on the planet both being uninterested in me wow that hurts a lot. and it makes me sad to think that i could be someones favorite person on the planet and i ditched them im sorry i dont wantt o make you feel that way but i feel as though i ahve and i am so sorry. THERE IS SO MUCH HURT IN THE WORLD AND THAT SUCKS ASS. A LOT. LIKE A LOT OF ASS. But there are also some beautiful things in the world. things like music. i love music. things like stories. stories are so fascinating. there is constantly something happening on earyh and there is a select few numbers of people who will experience it. 

im rediscovering myself. i lost her somewhere. somewhere in the mix of the kissing and the new bralettes and the frozen fruit snacks and the engieneers and the design projects i left her somewhere. shes out there. or maybe shes in here, tucked away behind a familiar smell. or maybe a new smell. i dont know what she likes. i dont know how to coax her out of me. shes made some appearances, for example when i was scrolling through instagram after that himym episode and it was earthyandy showing off some of her vegan ice cream with 10,000 emerald pools playing it jsut reminded me of humans existing and it was beautiful. and there are shades of her still in me writing this todaybut she doesnt overflow me anymore. which is ok. id rather have her be a little hidden than be garbanzo.

things that hurt:

thinking about the honeymoon phase.

and i know that this is like with God, am i in it for the reward or am i in it for Him? (ive come to discover im still very much in it for the reward i think. i am not the best. but im working on it. am ia ctually working on it. or do i just say that and ignore it. id ont know but i cant afford to put myself through the hurt of telling myself that im doing nothing.) 

but God, like actually God, I miss it.

i miss the romance. i miss feeling like i was floating, like the world was saturated, and my face was hot and things were sweaty in the best way. i miss feeling like i was flying, and like nothing had and ever would hurt me (sidenote, things did hurt.) i miss 

i miss still being pure

thats a rip

i am weak

but its in the past

i dont know if ive actually forgiven myself for that one yet

i feel less disgusting and more loveable than i did previously, which is good.

maybe im not ready fora  relationship.

but when will i be

i need to learn somehow

has phil been perfect?

no!

no he hasnt!!

today he told me “im going to stop replying for a while, dont get offended.”

which.

1. sucks. or well, is odd.

if he had opened and left me on read i wouldnt even flinch

if he just sent back a smiley face id be like lmao, probably send back a bitmoji

but he told me it was going to happen. which is just so weird.

2. i feel like im more offended that he told me to not get offended. dont tell me what to do. which, ok, i realize could be crazy, he jsut doesnt want to hurt my feelings but believe it or not phil its a little late for that its happened and im ok im fine ive forgiven it. i think. maybe. i just want to be there for you and with you and actually scratch that i want you to want me to be there for you and with you. i just dont feel very wanted by you sometimes which, weve discussed before i know that you know that youre not affectionate. or at least not when were in real life and not honeymooning (sidenote i feel like our honeymooning phase was shorter than others were and i find that unfair but whatever.) i signed up for htis. im consciously dating someone that is distant. am i okay with that? i dont want to jsut date boys to feel like im flying though i want us to 

i dont know

i was going to say be a team

but thats what phil says

and i dont want to let him pick these words for me

remember when i wrote that poem about chaos

and how i felt like i was in a storm and i dont know what to hold onto and i was like oh jk i want to hold onto you

yeah

me too

i think im there sitll

and like you said

the storm is inside your brain

and i want to be able to be the one to calm it

but maybe thats not my job

mabye thats a different persons job

maybe it is j=my job but its my job for later

maybe its your job

i dont know

but the idea of youd ating someone else really sucks

like a lot

liek a lot a lot

because i know

i know what the hunt is like now

i can imagine 

all of our friends

sitting somehwre, id ont know

and all the boys are checking out the hot girls around

and maybe im just old fashioned

maybe im still naive

maybe i am still just a noob

but that sucks so much

i dont want to be replaceable with a deli girl

or with ffg

not that theyre bad or anyhting but its the princile of it

that when im gone you jsut go back to sitting in the purple chairs at storms planning how to talk to the next girl

WOW THAT SUCKS

A LOT

THATS NOT HOW IT WORKS FOR GIRLS

And mayb ethats the point

actually i tak that back

im sure thats how it isf or some girls

but phil im not just some girl

phil im the girl that made lauryn hurley feel loved

im the girl that helped bring radk together

im the girl that blew ms crsit away

im the girl that used to look down in the damn hallway but looked up because she liked a boy

i didnt look up because i wanted to see a hot rack with blue eyes and a nice ass

i looked up because i wanted to be noticed

and intriguing

and wanted

and i jsut dont really feel like any of those things by you sometimes

and that hurts a lot

what is the point of this

this just sounds like i dont want to date him anymore

but i do

do i or do i jsut not want change

i do

i think

id ont know

but camille

right now you get the best of both worlds

you get to date him

who is goofy

and smells really good

and is strong

and is hungry for God 

and is grateful

and is

well

i was going to say a good listener

sometimes

but there is so much space between you two becaues this is a time for you

no one but you, camille

you can grow

this is a summer of self improvement.

you lost yourself somewhere and tou dont need anyone to help you find her

thats a lie

who i am is reflected onto me by those around me

but still

i dont need him.

i dont want to need anyone yet

i am young

im still finding out what i want

im still discovering myself

dear God,

i cant do this without you

youre the only one who will love me and satisfy me

“the human world, it’s a mess”

youre right

but thats knida the point

we feel things

we hurt

we love

we lvie

we cry

we laugh

we do all these things

and feel what we think is great

but then when we get to feel you, oh lord, we are blown away.

you are so much greater 

and i am not worthy, but only say the word and my soul shall be healed

im sorry

im sorry for disappearing

and i honestly cant see myself running back soon

which sucks

and i dont know how to fix it

i think i hurt a lot

which is so backwards

but im doing what they say normal people do

am i normal though

no

i literally jsut said im not

God i need you

help me find you

i bet you know how to find me.