#there’s too much personal damage that club has done to me

[sonny-shine]

If Jude ends up joining Liverpool my hate for that club is gonna skyrocket.

[xoxoskai]

Before anything else, I want to make it abundantly clear that these are all speculations.

I have taken whatever I could from the books and little hints and crumbs and come up with this theory and in no way does it reflect what will really be in the book.

Before I present my theory as to who the White Mask is, I want to cover who it isn't.

1. Vaughn Morozov

For everyone who doesn't know who Vaughn is, he's Kirill and Sasha's son and was, until recently, prime suspect #1 but Rina confirmed he will not be a part of Legacy of Gods so that essentially votes him out of this immediately.

2. Remington Astor

Before I started reading this series and had only heard of the White Mask, my first immediate guess went to the most unsuspecting person, Remi. Simply because no one would expect that from him and also because chances were that my man had more demons in his closet than he was letting on (like his Dad). However, he is not getting a book and the White Mask mystery is too good to not be revealed in a book which made me rule him out (sorrows and prayers, RemiAri you will always be famous)

3. Eli King

First of all, why would a 26 y/o participate in a passtime game of tag with college students? He's preparing to inherit an entire kingdom and I can't see him chasing people around for shits and giggles or for a more bloodthirsty reason. He simply does not have the time for it. Besides, even if he's not part of the Elites, he's dedicated to the entire united front that the Kings love to showcase which he won't betray just to satisfy his bloodlust (he might have other methods for it that does not require him to join the Heathens).

Which brings me to my prime suspect,

Ava Nash

Over the course of the first three books (Legacy of; Malice, Pain and Wrath), there were a lot of things that were said about Ava or in connection to her that hinted on something far more than simply words tossed to the wind.

(I will be referencing all of them and going forward will refer to the White Mask as WM)

I think the first, most obvious conclusion most people made was that the White Masked Heathen could be a girl. While the four known Heathens are all described as tall and muscular, it was specifically mentioned that WM was leaner.

(God of Wrath, Chapter 1, pg. 10)

Comes and goes as they please.

(God of Malice, Chapter 19, pg. 1)

Cherry could seduce the guards but not WM.

(God of Malice, Chapter 38, pg. 13)

Choice of weapon: Chains.

I always found this the most interesting because Killian, Jeremy and Nikolai rely on their strengths to wield their weapons whether it's a bat or a golf club or bare fists. It takes a considerable amount of power to swing those and inflict enough damage and pain.

But chains are easier to maneuver if you do not possess the actual strength to physically overpower your opponent. They can be swung at someone, used to disarm them or trip people or effectively cut air supply without exerting too much energy.

(God of Wrath, Chapter 1, pg. 9; God of Malice, Chapter 16, pg. 2)

Yes, I hear you. All of this is nice and good and obvious but where does Ava fit in?

Remember when Ava Nash took a shot for having done illegal things but not elaborating? There is so much more to her than what meets the eye.

Time and again, Ava has displayed tendencies that depict that violence does not bother that. That she finds it fun.

God of Malice, Chapter 7, pg. 2; God of Wrath, Chapter 4, pg. 8; God of Pain, Chapter 5, pg. 3; God of Wrath, Epilogue 2, pg. 1; God of Wrath, Chapter 25, pg. 2 God of Wrath, Chapter 25, pg. 2

Most Heathens: Jeremy, Killian and Nikolai partake in the brutal initiation to satiate their bloodlust of some sort. While Ava might not necessarily have the same level of thirst for violence as them, she is definitely a rule-breaker, loves treading the line between what is allowed and what isn't and has the most inside knowledge about the Heathens, something I will discuss in more detail soon.

If it's not obvious enough still,

Rina Kent does not like going with the obvious. She loves surprises and plot twists and I love getting surprised and having my mind blown.

Ava finds the entire concept of the initiation "fun" when mostly everyone outside of the Heathens has expressed distaste.

The reason I brought up WM's weapon of choice is because it was fascinating to me how Rina didn't go the conventional way of making Ava a pianist or a violinist which are usually what music majors in fiction pursue. She's a cellist. So, she probably has experience lugging her instrument to and from places. It speaks of considerable strength that she probably has carrying an instrument that weighs roughly 5-7 pounds around the campus daily, for years.

Every LoG book so far has been a Heathen X REU pairing.

Killian Carson X Glyndon King

Annika Volkov X Creighton King

Jeremy Volkov X Cecily Knight

Mia Sokolov X Landon King

Nikolai Sokolov X Brandon King

And lastly, Ava Nash X Eli King.

MORE STUFF SOON<3

[robinofinashiro]

"And if you go, I wanna go with you and if you die, I wanna die with you"

characters/fandom: feitan portor / hunter x hunter

request status/note: closed / ugh feitan you piece of shit i missed you lol lonely day by system of a down is such a good song for feitan imo

pronouns: she-her

you sharpened your knives, not bothering to look at chrollo who was lecturing you as machi helped patch you up. this wasn't the first time you had gotten such a lecture from your leader about being so reckless during missions but it was in your nature. you always managed to save your comrade in time even if it came at a price and this time it was your physical well being that was at stake.

you noticed that feitan was about to get stabbed and possibly not make it out of the fight without dying and you figured that his importance to the troupe was bigger than yours. you weren't the spiders #2 and you weren't the biggest person physically so if your life was taken, it wouldn't have been such a blow to the troupe. or at least that's what you thought.

chrollo had been grilling you for at least an hour for your reckless actions and you figured that maybe you were a bit more important than you thought, to chrollo at least. you continued to roll your eyes like a teenager getting screamed at by their parent but you hadn't said anything back. all you did was sit there and flinch every time machi had poked you with a needle.

"okay, you've been screaming at me for at least sixty minutes," you huffed as machi bandaged your last scar, "what has you so upset? this isn't the first time i've done this and the last three times you didn't bitch this hard."

chrollo had given the rest of the spiders a look to leave the room. they understood and walked out as you were left sitting on the chair with chrollo standing in front of you.

"i wasn't going to say this in front of those idiots but if feitan had lost you at the cost of his life, he would have had my head on a spiked pole for letting it happen," you nodded in agreement but didn't stop him from continuing the story, "you know more than anyone that feitan hates talking about his feelings but you know how important you are to him and if he found out that you died because of him, the troupe would have irreversible damage to it."

you stayed quite as chrollo ran his hands through his hair.

"and where do you think he's at right now?" he asked. you shrugged, really not knowing where he went after the fight, "he's murdering the group of people that tried to kill you or rather him but you get the point."

"how do you know all of this? i doubt he would've told you this to your face so spit it out."

chrollo laughed as he sat on the other chair next to yours, "it's not hard to read peoples minds; even feitan's is pretty easy to read, you just have to take the social cues when they're in front of you."

-

the entire troupe were on a mission and this time it took place inside of a club. you were dressed in the most uncomfortable club attire you could find and heels that made you want to chop your feet off. it was all too much for you but you knew that it would all be worth it for the money that all of you were promised.

you were sitting down on one of the bar chairs, chugging down a beer as you looked around at your surroundings. there had been a man, not one you were familiar with, staring at you for a while and although he wasn't bad to look at, you kept wondering why he was continuously staring at you.

"hey doll, first time i've ever seen you here," he finally said approaching you. you gave him a look of confusion, "uh yeah, that's because it's my first time here," you replied looking at your drink with annoyance.

"figures, i would have gotten with you a long time ago if i had seen you here before."

just as you were about to leave, you were handed a note from shalnark who was dressed up as a waiter. you quickly opened it up realizing that it was chrollo's handwriting.

"that's the man we need to execute, keep him close."

your eyes widened, not realizing that you had the bait in your hands. you gave him a sweet smile, before turning your attention to chrollo and shooting him a wink that silently meant that you'd have him in a secluded room for his death in no time.

"so, what plans would you have for me if you would have had a me a long time ago?" you asked, sliding on top of his lap and giving him the most fakest sweet smile you could muster, "how about i show you?" he asked now running his hand across your lap. you wanted to cringe but you knew that this was the perfect moment to cut the mission short and go home with the money.

you nodded as you turned over to chrollo and signaled him to follow you. chrollo could tell that feitan was fuming. it was hard to try and read what was going on through his head a lot of the time but this time it was fairly easy. he was fuming with jealousy and it showed. he knew that feitan had a thing for you but who didn't? you were cute and knew how to handle a battle on your own so what wasn't to like?

"come on, she'll need our help with him," he knew that you wouldn't but it was to try and give feitan some peace of mind. they followed your quietly into the room and as you pushed the man on the chair, you turned on the light and smirked, "but it looks like it'll be us giving you the show instead."

chrollo appeared behind you as the man's eyes widened at the spiders leader and their second captain. you smiled as you retrieved your own blade from it's cover and swung it in the air, "it's always so crazy to me that men will literally fuck anything they can get their hands on so i guess that has to be the first thing that goes, right?" you stated aligning the blade to his wrist.

feitan chuckled at your sadistic ways. he knew he must've been rubbing off on you but eventually you stepped back and gave the two men their rounds as you grabbed the wads and you meant wads of cash he had hidden on him. you stuffed them into your clutch that was hidden under your clothes and walked out as you were told to let the man die in the room. the police would find him in the morning, right?

the music was playing way too loud for anyone to hear him screaming so you went back onto the dance floor, happy that your mission was a success and you'd be off for at least a couple days now. you were whispered the success to your troupe members as they high fived each other in happiness.

you went back to the bar for another drink as feitan joined you.

"take shower at home," you gave him a questioning look, "man touched you so you have his germs now."

you giggled, taking a drink from the beer as he stayed my your side for the entire night. he wouldn't dare let another man touch you especially not in the way that the deceased man was.

-

you nodded in agreement. you knew what chrollo was saying was true but you knew never in a million years would feitan admit to it. in your own weird way, you kind of liked the relationship you and feitan had. it wasn't a solid relationship, not yet at least, but you knew within time, it'd get there. you just had to wait for feitan to get comfortable first.

it took two seconds before the door slammed open, a very angry looking feitan barging in screaming at you in his native language as chrollo excused himself.

you on the other hand sat on the chair, smirking at his antics. you knew this was his way of showing you his stressed out emotions of almost losing you but in his own feitan way. you would wait all day if it meant hearing him scream at you about the way he cared about you. you just had to remember to thank chrollo for opening your eyes about feitans feelings towards you.

[444m777]

Earlier today I started reading “You Are Not Alone” by Jermaine Jackson and there’s a prologue… I just knew this was gonna have me crying like a baby! 🥺

In the prologue Jermaine talks about the time Michael fell and injured his back and the family went to see him at the hospital during the 2005 trail (this was hours before the judge ordered him to come to court or else his bail would be revoked and so he had to leave wearing nothing but his pajama pants and a white top and black jacket).

It is GUT WRENCHING! Reading how he broke down (while in physical and mental pain) saying “Look at me! … Look at me! I’m the most misunderstood person in the world!” revealing his skin condition and his brother writing that this was the first time he’s seen the true extent of his brother’s vitiligo. He said he looked like a white man with coffee splashed over him. Michael used the power of makeup products to blend and hide his condition so to many people he just appeared to have bleached his skin even though Black people who do bleach don’t look the way Michael looked but I digress.

He talked about how Michael was very particular about how he wanted to appear during the court dates and had his outfits planned but on that day he couldn’t dress up and was dealing with the back injury from the fall at the hospital. I remember watching the news on TV (when my parents weren’t home) and how they made it seem like he was some fucking maniac and didn’t care about his court dates and honoring them. It was so humiliating what the press did to him. It was fashion police on a day that wasn’t anywhere appropriate about fashion and they made it look like he purposely was just lounging around in his pajamas laughing at how he’s going to “get away with this”.

Ugh…

There’s much more in the prologue that paints a better picture but I just wanted to share how the lies and public lynching got to him. Jermaine said his brother maintained a cold and detached demeanor but he knew on the inside Michael was falling apart with all that pressure and described in more detail his brother’s breakdown.

And how appropriate… his father (like many Black fathers) did not know how to comfort his son and instead tried to steer the conversation to getting him to perform a concert in China. I’m so happy that both Katherine and Jermaine shut it down and said how inappropriate it was to even bring that up in a moment like this. I know what it’s like to grow up around Black men who had no emotionally intelligent people around them to gauge situations and learn to hold space for others who are experiencing a breakdown. It’s always “let’s just forget about it and move on” (and that’s putting it nicely). Sweeping real and intense emotional situations under the rug further suppressing and ADDING trauma down the line. I understand him when he said he was scared of his father. Not just concerning the physical abuse but the PURPOSEFUL emotional neglect. He forgave his father in the end and quite publicly too (like in his Oxford speech) but the damage has looonggg been done.

Man, that was just the prologue and I went through a whole tissue pack reading it😔

I’ll be sharing more of my thoughts on this book and of course through our MJ Book Club The Historians discord server join the bookworm gang 📚

[raptorfae53]

Monster High Reimagined: Heath Burns Character Bio/redesign.

Heath Burns (He/Him)

(Paraguayan-American)

Boitata child of the burns family.

To the average eye,Heath is not the…sharpest tool in the shed,an overly excitable would-be casanova whose desire to impress often leads to him making a fool of himself,exactly the last person you'd think to give the flammable powers and responsibilities of the Boitata. But although an exuberant literal wild child, there's more than a few dimensions to him, most more apparent out in the wilds and nature than in the classroom…

Likes: Being in nature,wildlife,flame print,girls (particularly girls taller than him) and s’mores and other such campfire foods.

Dislikes: Environmental damage and destruction,colder weather, boring or tedious activities,being ignored when chatting,and people being two-faced.

Killer style: nothing but the coolest fashion for this fire spirit! We're talking bowling shirts,chain jewellery, and flame patterns on everything! (For the uninitiated reader, he dresses like Guy Fieri, and nobody has the heart to tell him, heath wouldn't mind regardless)

Familiar: none, besides the whole fire thing heath has no desire to keep animals as pets,he prefers nature wild,free and chaotic,like himself.

Pet Peeve: Seemingly always ending up a laughing stock in his frequent attempts to prove himself as cool,suave or funny as he'd like,Heath laughs it off with the rest of them but it stings nonetheless…

Freaky Flaw: Impatience,at least in man-made settings. Heath…has never done particularly well in a classroom setting and is usually desperate to get anything paperwork related done in a flash to get back to more interesting affairs, his attempts to remedy that being not as well thought out as he likes and usually getting him into more trouble than they were ever worth in the first place!

Spooky Secret: heath can tell his peers are saying stuff behind his back and don't respect him as much as he wishes, and far from his seeming obliviousness to it all it irritates him greatly, that goes for those gossiping about that cute Yeti girl too, she's not scary she's just trying to be friendly!

Dream job: Wildlife ranger,wildlife photographer or anything that gets him out in nature and not cooped up indoors, going to cool places and learning and helping all sorts of cool animals,plants and other such forms of life!

Five Fearsome facts:

Like the rest of his species, Heath's actual form resembles an anaconda made out of living fire. As cool as he and his friends do think this form is, heath takes a humanoid form (albeit one with golden skin and flames for hair) to better navigate society and/or not scare the living daylights out of regular humans.

In turn, heath is capable of controlling said fire with pyrokinesis, or at least he's training to,getting too overexcited tends to end with anyone nearby getting their hair singed as he's come to learn.

Befitting his species original role and bewildering his colleagues used to his airheaded personality,heath is a staunch environmentalist ,striking up a friendship with Venus over their shared interest and collaborating often with the plant monster on various efforts as part of monster high's environment and gardening clubs.

Heath is trilingual in English, Spanish and Guarani, having grown up in a household fluently speaking all three. Recently a pastime of his has been practising the fundamentals of a fourth language to properly chat to a girl in his year,as she's clearly more confident talking in her mother tongue instead of English and Heath would love to get to know her better…

Whilst being made out of fire might seem like a surefire reason to stay away from swimming pools ,heath is an adept and seasoned swimmer, if only his exuberant nature didn't turn every pool he's ever been in into a simmering,steaming hot tub!

Hello again to the second profile of seven this spooky season (I know its still September but personally summer doesn't quite agree with me yknow,bring on Halloween!)

Compared to Abbey, (whose inspiration is well known by most people in the mh fandom) what exactly Heaths monster type and inspo is a little less well-known, so there's some explanation down below regarding exactly that!

Anyways,hope you enjoyed this profile, and see you next week for the next one. (It's going to be one I should've done a while ago tbh,if that's any clue...)

Anyways,regardless of all that, you probably have one primary question on your mind.

What's a Boitata, and why is Heath one?

In regards to the first question, a boitata is an Amazonian nature spirit that takes the form of a giant flaming snake and which protects the animals and plants of the forest from harm. The Boitata is from Guarani mythology, who live primarily in Paraguay and the surrounding countries, hence why Heath is from a trilingual Paraguayan family.

And to answer the second question, like toralei before him, I dont like the whole fire elemental thing, and him being a demon/hellborn goes against one of the fundamental rules I set myself regarding what monsters the monster high characters are based on. No Abrahamic Demons,Angels,direct children of Gods ,Aliens (bar one,but we'll get to them later) and no bigfoot because I thought it'd be funny if that were where i drew the line.

So I had a look at some of the other fire based monsters, and the boitata, in particular, simply caught my eye. (+ the environmental protector thing I thought fit Heaths g3 personality, as all things considered my version of him is a mix of g1 and g3 in terms of design and personality instead of purely one or the other...)

Also for better reference here's a collection of different renditions of the creature to give a better picture:

[slen-tiid-vo]

NSFW headcanons for a few characters

Contains brynjolf, ulfric, rikke, karliah, serana, Astrid, miraak, and teldryn

Brynjolf

Whats the opposite of a power bottom? Fuck it, a Brynjolf is the opposite of a power bottom. This man takes the reins, but he's going wherever the fuck his partner points, you feel me? Brynjolf is the kind of guy who gets so into being on top/dominate, that he circles back around into this odd type of submission. Loses all control even if he, technically, is the one in control.

Boy's got a knack with his fingers and hands that would make Dibella damn proud of him.

Favors slow, sensual encounters. Brynjolf would rather have a deeply erotic, charged moment full of intimacy and sensuality, than actually have sex. The anticipation is addictive to him. He can do something rougher, and with enthusiasm, but those long, drawn out, torturously slow affairs rewrites his brain chemistry.

Ulfric

Has fucked one person, in his whole life, and has no intention of ever doing so again. It was a girl he fell in love with in the Legion, and they planned to marry after it was all over. Well. "Over" never came, and she sided with the Legion. He still thinks of her, and misses her.

When he was with her, his greatest asset was his voice; he was a sweet talker who didn't shut up, and she loved his deep voice and thick accent right in her ear. The voice is still an allure, but only if you can get him talking, now. Would be much more reserved in bed these days

Eats pussy but the beard is...an acquired taste

Rikke

Has done damage with those thighs in and out of the bedroom, first of all

Had the drive of a saber cat in heat when she was younger. Now, she just has the ferocity, and none of it translates in bed. If she has the time, and is that desperate, to hook up, wants it done quickly and efficiently. Its like a trip to the healer rather than something to enjoy

Has fantasies of clothed sex, or fucking in a wide open space where anyone could see if they walked in. Would never act on it

Has a thing for babblers

Miraak

This is an endurance test, and not just because of what he's packing. Dragonborn stamina is...well. Dragons do their thing one way, humans do theirs another. Dragon stamina is not in the same ballpark as human.

Honestly, not very good at sex. He never learned how to use his dick beyond what felt good for him. Never learned how to use his hands or mouth for a similar reason. He's open to learning, but...he might be pissy about the whole "You're not very good at this" thing. Sensitive in more ways than one.

Karliah

Used to routinely attend what was, essentially, a strip club with Gallus for date nights. They both enjoyed the pageantry, and the shamelessness of it did a lot for her, being a reserved person.

Still enjoys such shows, but hasn't attended one since.

Used to enjoy public sex, right under everyone's noses. Or above on the rooftops. Or under bridges. In a tree, once

Serana

Ace lesbian argue with the wall

Has a soft spot for orc ladies. Real big soft spot. She likes a big teddy bear lady who can turn into a grizzly if need be. And a nice pair of arms...woof

Occasionally 'window shops' dudes and has a tier list of which men from every local faction she finds attractive. Arnbjorn from the Dark Brotherhood is at the very bottom, thinks he smells so fucking bad. The top? Viarmo at the Bards' College. A classy gent.

Would kill someone if Mjoll the Lioness asked

Astrid

Carefully curated the femme fatale persona, but not that horny, actually. Arnbjorn doesn't have much drive, being too prickly of a bastard, and Astrid just finds it a chore half the time

When they do find themselves in the mood, they have to go find a fort or something in the woods. The Sanctuary echoes. There's no soundproofing. Nazir threatened to neuter Arnbjorn if it ever happened again.

Astrid doesn't give a shit but Arnbjorn does. And so, the Sanctuary can rest easy, knowing that it isn't them being kept up all night if the married couple run off together

Teldryn

So fucking picky with everything, but he's great for sizing up someone else's potential partners.

This fucker has so many requirements and hard no's. He's worse than Miraak. If their stone sign is warrior and their mother is from the ____ region and their dad is alive, hard no. That kind of thing. Has a lot of icks.

That being said, fucks like a rabbit. Hypocrite, or settling for less? You decide

Uses magic for sex and has gotten rather good with it. Has hurt himself experimenting, however

[zaceouiswriting]

Fairy Prince - Hearts of Leviathans - Ch.15

Character: Sky x male reader, Riven x male reader, Brandon x male reader

Universe: Somewhere in Winx Club/Saga

Warnings: None

I walk through the crowd with my chest swollen with endless pride. Even if they don't like me alone, my presence forced them to make room for me, most likely so that none of them would have to touch such a despicable person as me.

Saladin watches all this with a horrified expression. However, before things got too bad, he hit his staff on the ground. The magical wave that courses through everyone draws everyone's attention to him. It quickly relieves me of the feeling that I've done something despicable when I was only trying to enter my new school.

Just as the elderly headmaster of the Red Fountain Academy began his speech, something else caught my attention. From the side of my field of vision, the building suddenly attracts my interest like a magnet.

The building is made of red brick and yellowish sandstone, with small and large windows that reveal the dark brown interior. The entire house is trembling with anticipation. It's been a long time since anyone has been here: the old academy building, which looks like a small castle. Like everything else my family built, this building was made with our magic, through which it has a mind of its own. Inside is a magical core that beats as if it has a heart that keeps it alive. There is not a single crack visible on the entire exterior of the building, even though no one has taken care of it for so long.

My gaze slowly wanders up to the second and third floors. There in a window stands a man in an old suit. A monocle hangs from his left eye, and his right ear is covered with a bandage.

But soon, the man moves away. As soon as he is gone, my gaze goes further up the building to the bright blue roof. Furthermore, I could see two towers, one behind the building on the left and the other in front on the right. While the tower on the back is much taller than the one on the front, the smaller one strikes a feeling of terror in my veins.

Cory's tight grip on my shoulder draws my attention back to him. This time, I even turn slightly to look into his disapproving eyes.

“They’re trying to get in,” he whispers to me.

Shocked and annoyed, my mouth opens without me doing anything. Not to say anything. It just happened. Sometimes, I wish people would stop trying to invade our territory. There is no magic in the universe - except perhaps the Empresses or Emperors - that makes our magic listen to anyone else.

Taking a step forward, the hand on my shoulder slowly falls off. Even though I could still feel him walking behind me, he gives me enough space to do whatever I want.

“Have you ever tried knocking?” I know the sarcastic tone in my voice is audible because almost everyone groans in disapproval. The same woman who called the specialists on me gives me a sideways glance so full of venom that I only want to slap it off her face. Instead, I push past these moral hypocrites and straight to the door.

As I suggested, I knock on the door quite forcefully. But even after a few minutes, nothing happens. I could hear people whispering, calling me “disgusting” and “disgraceful.” They laugh at me everywhere and surely think that I am not only a creep but also stupid. I completely ignore the two principals who couldn't open the door themselves. I could force the doors open if I wanted to, but it would damage the already troubled house. The spells haven't been renewed for a while.

Out of nowhere, the large double doors open. Honestly, it wasn't all that sudden because the door squeaked loudly as someone opened it from the inside. But it’s obvious that the door is difficult to open. When the doors were finally opened, the same elegantly dressed man I had previously seen in the window stood before me. 

"Welcome, ho-" I could barely shake my head before he would say anymore. The man seems to understand immediately. He clears his throat, puts a hand over his mouth, and looks down for a second. When he looks up again, he shows a small smile. “Welcome, guests! Please state your intentions.”

One of the specialists suddenly pushes me aside. I immediately lost my balance and couldn't avoid falling into a group of girls. They scream and call me a pervert once again. The group even went so far as to walk away from me and let me fall to the ground. As the dirt covers my clothes, many people stand around me and laugh loudly at me.

Anger slowly grows inside me. I have never been treated so disrespectfully! I had to use all my energy to keep my temper under control so as not to explode. Just then, someone extends their hand to me. As I follow the long arm with my eyes, I immediately look into the smiling eyes of the only one of these disgusting people who treats me like a normal being.

Without hesitation, I take his hand and stand back on my feet in one swift move.

“You are not welcome here!” The same voice of the older man who opened the door from the inside echoes across the castle's forecourt. As I look around, all eyes were on me. Most of them look very happy. Because, of course, everyone believes that the man means me. Who else could he be referring to?

But I only grin back at the people. I know these words are not meant for me.

I ignore the other people and wander over to the guy who pushed me to the ground. The butler-looking man stands before him and does not allow him to enter the building.

"You have no right to keep me out! I am Artheon Papalgio, and I'm-"

“Unimportant,” the man replies before the young man can finish his sentence. Shocked, the dirty blonde stares at the man as if he had seen a ghost. “The House of Papalgio, a minor noble house of Eraklyon, known for their loyalty and skill in administration. Notable Members-"

“Stop,” the young man whimpers. He seems ashamed of his family, which he shouldn't do since most specialists don't come from aristocratic families.

Saladin desperately tries to get Artheon into the old academy building. But the other man didn't let a word get to him. Looking straight forward, without looking at anyone, the man speaks again.

“It's not me who has to let him in. He did not insult me, but another student,” he told Saladin in a hard and cold voice.

“I forgive him this time,” I say slowly, as I can feel everyone’s eyes on me again. I look sharply at the guy. Who still seems to think he is better than me.

The smartly dressed man nods at him and opens his arm to let the first person in. But when Artheon tries to be that first person, he gets pushed back.

“You will be the last one,” said the man, still standing in the doorway, harshly. Only to open his arm again so I can walk through. After me, the man lets in all the others. Even the teachers had to enter before Artheon was allowed to enter. I silently thank the man again and again.

Neither headmaster even waited for Artheon to be let in before walking further into the building. Saladin, in particular, mutters something under his breath about the size of the building, as he remembers it being much larger.

He tries again every spell he knows to make the building the way he remembers it, but nothing works.

Cory's hand grabs my shoulder again.

“What is it today with you touching me?” I ask him quietly, hissing. He doesn't back down. He only gives me a knowing look. With both arms in front of me, I finally give in after he stared at me for about a minute.

But before I do anything, I snatch his hand from my shoulder and walk away from him, leaning casually against one of the walls, mostly away from anyone's attention. The inside of my hand pressed against the cold stone of the house.

I close my eyes and let my magic flow into the house, searching for its core because the building didn't respond to my call immediately.

“Master,” an indescribable voice calls to me.

A smile even grows on my face. The voice sounds just like the one that echoes through the palace at home, which I listened to on silent nights. It has helped me a lot, from helping me out while playing hide-and-seek to giving me tips while studying.

“Can you expand?” I ask the house happily.

But the magic didn't answer me. It just left me feeling empty. Unwilling to let the house slowly die, I pump magic into it. Luckily, since I've been full of magic for so long, the reproduction happens quickly as it needs to return to a normal flow.

Soon, I could hear the interior space expanding, feel rooms being added, and even hear water splashing in a distant corner of the building.

When I open my eyes again, smiling even wider after the magic thanks me, I glance over to Cory. When our eyes meet, my body shakes before I can understand what is happening. I stumble to the side. Cory catches me barely in time, his face full of panic, so worried I could almost believe it.

But I remember he's just my grandfather's lap dog, so I push him away as soon as I'm calm enough. For a second, I even imagined I could see a hurt glint in his eyes. 

I quickly turn away from him. But I still can't concentrate on what Saladin is rambling about. His voice to me is like a Toggo - a small round animal, unable to move in warmth - that my old teacher hit on the head to bring my attention back to him or to torment me.

With my mind blank, I stare at the old man, trying to find anything special about him besides his staff in the shape of a snake, even with a snake's eyes as the centerpiece.

“Are you ready to go to your room?” A sudden voice robs me of my inner silence. It even startles me a little. When I turn to the person, I see the same woman who called the specialists on me, speaking to me again like some vile creature. Her voice is so fake-sweet that I want to hit her.

With a sweet smile as fake as her voice, I look her disgustingly up and down and say, "No."

"What? How dare you talk to me like that?"

“I'm waiting at the training field to the right of the building. You have to go past some trees as the place is overgrown because no one cared about it for so long,” I tell the old headmaster, ignoring the woman's outburst. 

My voice comes out in the same sweet tone, only with an underlining accusatory tone.

Before any of the teachers could answer, I walk past everyone. On the way out, I meet Cory again. As soon as I'm next to him, I suddenly stop. I look into his eyes intently. He holds my gaze and doesn't even flinch.

“Who broke the spell?” I ask him, whispering in his ear. He remains silent, his gaze never wandering anywhere else. “It was Saladin, wasn’t it?” Suddenly, he swallows hard and answers my question with it. But instead of getting angry, I smile. “The old man is more powerful than I thought.”

Now that I know what happened to my silencing spell, I walk past Cory. To the front door. The elegantly dressed man is still standing at the door, watching me with a longing in his eyes. When no one was looking, I winked at him with a half-smile. He looks at me slightly questioningly, almost sadly. I'm sure that if I had stopped right before him, it would have been a happy reaction because he and the other servants seemed to have been waiting for a long time.

But I don't want to blow my cover just yet. I'm waiting for the perfect moment to do it, and when it happens, I will apologize to the servants for my behavior.

[Masterlist]

[anaisthete]

the fetishization of "goth girls" has really done irreperable damage to my self esteem i think

everywhere i see "goth girls (debateable if they are really goth, most of the time not and just wear black or are part of some other alt community) getting compliments and praise for their looks... but i dont look like them (skinny, pretty hair etc) and irl no person every gives me compliments except for my besties of course. and when i go outside (like at the club or uni) no person i would be interested in ever talks to me or tries to get my number (except for old creeps aka the goth fetishizers)

and i dont think that i look bad, i actually think that im pretty, but this belief is solely based on my own perception and im confident in my appearance but it still hurts. like "why dont i get compliments? is there something wrong with the way i look?"

maybe i just dress too "actual goth" and not "alt of model" for them lmao

(and of course i DONT condone the feteshization of goth people AT ALL and it really pisses me off as much as any other goths but it still hurts my feelings and confidence..)

[ambrossart]

I decided to write my own it fanfiction because of you!! ive read some of your and other critics about bowers gang stories and im trying my hardest to take those in consideration, but i also feel like im late lol the it fandom is almost non existent 😔😔 do you have any advice or tips?

First off, I love that you’re working on your own fic. That’s so awesome!

Second… gosh, I don’t even know if I’m qualified to be giving advice. My writing is so niche, and I feel like there are better people to ask about this kind of thing. I mean, there has to be, right? Or maybe the fandom is that dead. 😬 😂 I dunno, I’m kind of an outsider when it comes to the IT fandom. Apart from writing Paper Men, I don’t interact with it much… or at all, honestly. I’m like a kid playing alone in the sandbox. Sometimes other kids stop by, say hi, compliment my sandcastle, but for the most part I’m just entertaining myself.

So here’s my generic, cliched advice:

Write the fanfiction you wanna read.

Seriously, do whatever you want.

When I started Paper Men, I stopped caring about what everyone else is doing.

This is truly the best advice I can give you: do whatever you want.

Now, to get more Bowers gang specific (I'm assuming you're writing about the Bowers gang. If not, some of these still apply):

Accept these characters for what they are: 🗑️🗑️🗑️ and 🔥🗑️

You can't fix them. You can't change them. I don't care how special your character is. I don't care how "in love" these boys claim to be. These guys are horrible people and partners, and nothing is gonna change that. Nothing.

This is especially true for Henry and Patrick. Henry's way too damaged and Patrick can't magically grow a conscience, so embrace that or stay the hell away from them.

With Belch and Vic, you have a lot more flexibility, especially if you’re going the romance route.

That doesn’t mean you can’t have Henry and Patrick in relationships. You just have to tread carefully and understand your limitations. The rules are different with those two.

Book!Patrick and movie!Patrick are separate characters, so if you wanna make Patrick a little softer, go with his movie portrayal. Since he had such little screentime, you can give him whatever personality you want.

Don't romanticize their violent/abusive/toxic behavior. Seriously, don't.

Avoid the New Kid trope at all costs. It's been done to death at this point.

And no, the Bowers gang won’t be nice to the new kid. Ever.

At best, they’re just gonna ignore them.

Odds are your character isn't going to be close friends with both the Losers club and the Bowers gang. These groups are natural enemies and, more importantly (and especially if you're following the movie canon), they're in completely different age groups. The Bowers gang are all 15-16 and the Losers are 12-13. These groups rarely mix.

If you’re gonna have all the canon characters be drawn to your character, you better give her/him/them one helluva magnetic personality. Otherwise, it’ll seem forced.

Don't have invisible parents. Yes, I realize Derry is full of abusive/neglectful parents, but I feel like many writers go this route simply because it's more convenient. No parents means no rules. But it also isn't very realistic.

Please, please, please, don't ignore Belch and Vic, especially Belch.

Better yet, write about Belch! Nobody ever does 🥺

If you haven't already, read the book.

Sorry, it's hard to give advice without knowing more about your story. I don't know if you're writing a romance or not. I don't know what characters you're focusing on. I don’t know if you’re creating an original character. So if you want more specific advice, you can always DM me or shoot me another Ask. My inbox is always open. 😊

[crazyunsexycool]

Is it a crime?

Chapter 9

Pairing : mob boss!bucky barnes x mob boss!reader

Word count: 3.3k

Warnings: mentions of domestic abuse, mentions of smut, violence, knife use, loss of limb, drug use, alcohol consumption

A/N: the long awaited chapter for this series… honestly I don’t know how to feel about this chapter but here it is I do have some interesting things planned for this series though!!

Series masterlist

9 years ago

James Buchanan Barnes was a ghost.

He was the shell of who he used to be. A whisper in the shadows of the already dark and seedy underbelly of the city. Since the night of the infamous Y/L/N murder it was clear that Bucky Barnes had changed. The switch that flipped inside of him was losing you.

Even being the heir to the Barnes family empire Bucky had always been known as charming and even kind. Not to be considered weak, he was a beast in his own right. Some would even go as far as to say he could instill more fear in someone than his father. Yet he had earned more respect from others in the business. It wasn’t fear disguised as respect no, the now twenty one year old had gained genuine respect from the others in this business. It was the worst kept secret that eventually the Y/L/Ns and the Barnes would become one when you and Bucky inevitably married. Everyone fought to be on Bucky’s good side lest they be the target of his wrath.

Now though, that person had died. His heart had been ripped away and sent out of New York. What was left was a ruthless man who thirst for blood. Specifically the blood of hydra. It was enough to send hydra’s associates running for the hills. There were some that didn’t care. They didn’t believe the whispered warnings. They saw Bucky as nothing more than an inconvenience until they were face to face with him.

Like right at this moment.

Bucky stood in the dark alleyway. A cigarette between his lips and a knife in his hands. Hydra had been pushing their business closer to his territory. It’s not like he needed a reason to kill hydra men but that could lead to a war and George Barnes didn’t want that. If it were up to him he’d call a truce with Pierce just for getting rid of you but Bucky had done too much damage in the span of just three months for that to happen now.

Bucky tosses his cigarette on the ground and steps on it before heading out of the alley. Pierce’s men had stolen from him and he was determined to make them pay. Before he even rounds the corner completely Bucky has already stabbed one of the guards. The knife slicing right into his lung, the man wheezes and falls to the floor. Bucky makes sure he won't get up again. On the other side of the street Steve handles some other of Pierce’s people, while Bucky makes his way into the warehouse.

By the time he was done the warehouse was on fire and all of the hydra scum that was supposed to protect Pierce’s assets were inside.

7 years ago

The music was deafening. Bucky’s first club was up and running successfully despite his father’s insistence that it would fail. Bucky sat up straight after trying the new drug the infamous Bruce Banner had cooked up. There’s some leggy redhead that had attached herself to his side the moment he walked in and he was already wasted so he didn’t care.

“Why don’t you try that and tell me what you think?” Bucky whispered in her ear as he held out what looked like a tiny piece of paper. She stuck her tongue out and when he placed his finger on the tip she wrapped her lips around it. Her tongue swirling around his finger until he pulled his hand away harshly.

It didn’t take long for the effect to take place and Bucky found himself shaking hands with Bruce after closing a deal to sell his new concoction only through Bucky and only at his clubs.

“Bucky, we have to go. You have a meeting.” Steve said as soon as Bruce walked out of the vip area.

He was beyond annoyed with Bucky’s behavior. Steve had even parted ways with him for a few weeks because Bucky was being so reckless he was sure to get one or both of them killed. He understood the pain Bucky had been hiding under the recklessness. He hadn’t been the only one to lose you. Frankly Steve had been just as upset when he heard the news and he was ready to go out and bring hydra down. Both men had thrown themselves into work but in very different ways. Steve became more calculating, double and triple checking his plans to make sure everything fell into place. He couldn’t lose anyone else.

“If my father thinks I’m not smart enough or for old enough to take over already he can fucking go to the meeting.”

“Buck…”

“Get out. I don’t give a fuck about the damn meeting.” Bucky was up and in Steve’s face.

“The only reason you’re this upset is because Y/N’s birthday is coming up.”

There was an instant and drastic change in the room. The tension builds so quickly it’s suffocating. Bucky reacts without thinking, his fist already flying toward Steve’s face. Fortunately he was high and a bit drunk so Steve was able to move out of the way just in time.

“What did I fucking say about mentioning her?”

“You,” Steve points at the redhead. “Get out.”

She scowled in his direction but left anyway.

“You need to get your shit together. At some point the way you’ve been acting because of Y/N is going to get you killed. What if she comes back and finds out you’re gone huh? At least you have your mom and Becca and your friends. Y/N is out there with nothing and I can’t fucking find her to make sure she’s ok. All you do is get high or drunk and act like a child that had their toy taken away.” Steve yelled. “You’re not the only one who lost her so man the fuck up already.”

“Get the fuck out Steve. I’m not gonna deal with your bullshit.”

Bucky moved to the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. He returned to the couch and sat down before taking a drink directly from the bottle.

Steve just stared at him for a moment before he started walking out. “She’d be so disappointed if she saw you like this.” He said over his shoulder.

The bottle Bucky had in his hand flew into a wall and shattered on impact. A blood curdling scream turned into a sob in his throat. He knew Steve was right. If you saw him right now you’d probably hate him. Still he couldn’t bring himself to be better. What was the point?

Underneath everything he had become, Bucky was still that 20 year old that had to watch while you ran for your life. At the time he didn’t have enough influence within the Barnes crime family or in New York. His hands were tied behind his back and he blamed himself for failing to protect you. That would always be his biggest regret. All he had left was hope that you were still alive and that you could somehow reach out to let him know you were ok.

But everyday that hope dwindled a little more. Until he was left with nothing.

6 years ago

A trap had been set by hydra. George had willingly given Becca to Pierce as a bargaining chip. Hoping that she would be enough to stop the war before it began.

Bucky was furious when his mother told him what had happened. And even though his relationship with most of his friends was rocky he called on Steve and Sam to help get Becca back. He should have known that Pierce and Rumlow would use his sister to lure him out.

Bucky doesn’t remember much of what happened once he stepped into the abandoned building. All he knows now is that he’s in a hospital. He goes in and out of consciousness. The doctors go on and on about something but whatever they have him on has thrown him for a loop.

Arm.

Amputate.

Pain.

Miracle.

Lucky.

Those are the only things he was able to capture. Everything is hazy and far away. Whatever pain medication they're giving him is the best thing he’d ever had. Bucky swears he can hear your voice, see your face and feel your hand on his face before he’s unconscious again.

When he fully wakes up the first thing he does is ask for you. Winnie and Becca are at his side reminding Bucky that you aren’t there. Bucky cries over the fact that he imagined you but not so much at the news that he lost his left arm. He looks at Becca who is beaten and bruised and all he wants to do is get back out there and destroy Pierce. Then find a way to destroy his father.

The pain is unbearable, nightmares interrupt his sleep. Adjusting to not having a limb is so difficult Bucky thinks it won’t get easier. He’d prefer to just crawl into bed and never get out. Winnie, Becca, Sam and Steve don’t allow that to happen.

5 years ago

It took a year of doctor visits and appointments before he could be fitted for a prosthetic. Of course he did intensive research with the help of Becca to find the best money could buy.

Now with a metal arm more people seem to be afraid of Bucky. A feeling he relished and used to his advantage. Something in him changed too. He felt the old him die. There was no use in emotions; he would only hurt himself. Bucky closed that part of himself off. The part of himself that thought he could have a happy life and love. Instead he focused on his job, on hitting hydra back for touching Becca. Of course George is furious at this but he isn’t as vocal about it afraid of Bucky, considering the rampage Bucky is going on.

****

He’s relentless in his pursuit. Bucky had managed to pull together a group of men he trusted. None of them had any connections to his father. They were just trying to make a name for themselves. Luckily enough for Bucky. Hydra had also screwed them over so it was easy to get them on board with the promise of their own money tacked on. They called themselves the Howlies because of how they made their enemies cry out in pain.

When Bucky isn’t destroying hydra or their associates he’s either high or drunk and fucking some girl he met at his club. When he’s done he feels disgusted, like he’s cheated on you. The most recent girl gets kicked out of his office before she’s even dressed. He can hear her cursing up a storm but he couldn’t care less. Bucky sits in his office alone, looking down at the dance floor through the large window. Every time he did he wished for you to magically show up.

That would never be the case and for the first time since that night he began reluctantly accepting that he’d never see you again.

3 years ago

It was a rumor. Not really a rumor but a whisper in the wind. Just something said in passing but it was enough to give Steve hope. A group of mercenaries or something was traveling around taking jobs others wouldn’t. Starting connections and dealing with groups no one else could. All of them led by the so-called mob princess of New York.

Steve walked into the Barnes residence knowing Bucky would be finishing up a meeting with George. He had possible good news and he was going to tell Bucky before leaving in search of you again.

“Steve.” Winnie intercepted him before he could make it to Bucky.

“Mrs. Barnes, you aren’t going to believe it. I think I can find Y/N.”

“I’ve heard, how sure of this are you?”

“I’m pretty sure.”

“Steve if you aren’t even 75% sure that it could be her— you can’t tell him. If it isn’t or you don’t actually find her it will break him. He’s already on edge because of his father. And I can’t see him like that again.”

“Please don’t cry.” Steve moved to comfort the older woman. “I won’t say anything. Just tell him I had to go away on business and I’ll see him in a few days.”

“Thank you, please be safe.”

*****

“Where have you been?” Bucky asks Steve without even looking up from the documents he had in his hand.

“I had some business to take care of.”

“That’s what my mother said. What business?” His head snaps up to look at Steve.

“Nothing important. The plans fell through anyways.”

“So nothing to do with Y/N then?”

“I’m sorry what?” Steve did his best to look confused.

“You heard the rumor about some team being led by the so-called princess of New York and you tried to go find her. Am Icorrect?”

“Yes, listen I didn’t tell you because-“

“It doesn’t matter why you didn’t say anything. She’s not here so it obviously wasn’t her or you missed her. Anyways it doesn’t matter.” Bucky shrugged his shoulders.

“Why doesn’t it matter?”

“There’s no reason to keep-“ Bucky clears his throat. “To keep looking for her.” He said quietly. “She’s been gone this long with no type of communication. It's obvious she isn’t interested in coming back.”

“You don’t mean that.”

“I have a business to run and that’s what I’m going to focus on.”

Steve looked at him with concern. “Did something happen while I was out?” He asks.

“Nothing to worry about. Why don’t you rest today and I’ll catch you up on what you’ve missed tomorrow morning?”

“Buck-“

“Don’t. I’ve made my choice. I can't continue to live hoping that she’ll show up here one day when I know she won’t.”

Steve just nodded and decided to leave and talk to Sam. It’s obvious his father got to him and he was going to need back up.

1 year ago

“It’s time you stop fooling around. I thought that by giving you time you’d straighten yourself out but you’ve been insufferable.” George Barnes told his son from behind his desk.

“I’m doing my job. I’m making this family money, I’ve strengthened our relationship with the rest of the families and I’ve kept hydra in line. So please enlighten me on how I’m fooling around?”

“No one is going to take you seriously if you keep fucking around with those whores. You need to settle down.”

“I would have settled down if you had kept your promise when Pierce killed Y/L/N. Y/N and I would be unstoppable-“

“Enough.” George slammed his fist on his desk. It was a move that used to instill fear in Bucky as a child, but not so much now. “It’s been almost ten years, get over it. You sound like a pussy every time you whine about her.”

“Fuck you. I’m never going to get over it. She was everything to me and you knew that. But you only care about yourself and your money. If you hated having a family and children why did you get married in the first place?”

“Because it was my obligation. To keep the family name and business going. And just like I had to do it, so will you.” George pulled some documents out of a drawer and dropped them in front of Bucky. “I’ve already found someone for you. All you have to do is sign the contract and we can proceed with the wedding.”

“I’m not signing shit without my lawyer reviewing and adding my own stipulations.”

“The family lawyer was the one to put it together.”

“I have my own lawyer.” Bucky said as he glanced down at the document. “See, the family lawyer works for you so I don’t trust him, or you for that matter. My amended contract will be the final say if not, this arrangement isn’t happening.” Bucky got up and walked out.

******

It took almost a week but Bucky finally returned to the family home with the revised contract and set it on his father’s desk. His personal lawyer found too many requests that would screw Bucky over permanently.

“It’s this or nothing.” He states calmly and then proceeds to sit and watch George Barnes lose his shit over every stipulation he’s added.

“You’ve got to be out of your damn mind if you think I’ll agree to any of this.”

“You either sign and walk away with a nice retirement plan or I move on you and your men. Either way I’ll end up in full control of our territory and you’ll be gone.” Bucky states calmly.

Bucky’s requests were simple. He would be allowed to divorce after 2 years of marriage at which time the bride’s family would sign their businesses over to Bucky for a large sum of money. The day of the wedding George Barnes would officially step down as the head of the family and Bucky would take total control of everything. But the most important and the one request he wouldn’t change was that George would have to grant his mother a divorce and move away from the city.

“This is my city boy. I’m not moving and I’m not letting your mother go either.”

“You will sign the divorce papers, that’s non negotiable. If you don’t I will personally do to you every single thing you ever did to her. Everything.” Bucky’s eyes were ablaze with rage.

“You wouldn’t dare-“

Before George could finish the sentence Bucky had reached over the desk, grabbed his hand and held it there before stabbing him with the knife he had been wielding in his left hand. George cried out in pain as Bucky pulled the blade out.

“You ungrateful brat.” George spat.

“I was six years old when you did that to my mother at the dinner table because she didn’t make the meal you wanted. Then you refused to let her see a doctor until dinner was over. I suggest you sign the contract because if you don’t you’ll be in a lot more pain.”

****

A blonde that looked like she had been plucked out of a 1940’s housewife guide comes walking in. Curls bouncing, hips swaying, heels clicking, smile blinding. Bucky hated her immediately.

“Hi, I’m Dorothy but you can call me Dot.” She stretched her hand out in order for Bucky to shake it although it seemed she expected a kiss to the back of her hand.

“James.”

“I know,” she giggled, it was infuriating. “Your dad has told me so much about you.”

“It’s a shame I can’t say the same about you.”

“It’s ok, we’ll have plenty of time to get to know each other.”

Bucky rolled his eyes. “Unfortunately.” He mumbled.

Present

The bar was a little hole in the wall. You’d miss it if you didn’t know it was there. Bucky and Steve walked in with purpose, the other patrons stopping their conversation except for a table at the back. They were a rambunctious bunch.

“Well look at what the cat dragged in.” Tim Dugan called out from behind the bar. “Hey guys! Look who's here.”

The rest of the Howlies turned their attention to the bar. All of them immediately get up and welcome Steve and Bucky with open arms. They spend some time catching up before the question is asked.

“So what are you doing here after not seeing each other for some two years?” Falsworth asked.

“I need your help again. I know I said I wouldn’t drag you back in but there are very few people that I trust with my life. Most of them are sitting at this table.”

“What do you need help with?”

“Hydra.”

The men looked at each other before deferring to Dugan.

“When do we start?” He said with a sly grin.

Ch 10

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[mythserene]

John in the Star Club Tapes: No Mr. Lewisohn, he is not charming

It is so stressful to listen to the December 28th Star Club tapes. And for anyone who has endured a relationship with an out-of-control person, who has tried to minimize the damage in public, terrified in every moment, it is borderline traumatic. You’re not terrified of anything in particular, but you still feel terrified. As moments stretch out, beat by beat, every hair on your body feels electrified. Your senses are on fire. Your blood seems hot and thick. You can hear and feel your pulse BOING-BOING-BOINGing in your head, and you are just trying to get through another second. You are blind to everything else and any future. All there is is now and you must, somehow, get through this because there is no escape. 

I can remember the understanding that dawned on me when I first heard Paul trying so hard to keep it together. Heard Ringo trying to distract with little drum fills, and for the first time truly understood how much George’s guitar is his voice.

But that is not at all what Mark Lewisohn got from these tapes. (By the way, I’ve done a few threads on this night as it breaks down, and I don’t have it in me to parse through and post all that audio again now.)

--

LEWISOHN: I mean, John— we need to talk about John Lennon on this recording. These recordings. Because he’s uh— he’s- he’s- he’s belligerent. Um, he’s under the influence of— I’m sure he’s under the influence of Prellies. Probably drink, as well. Um, he’s beguiling, he’s rude—

CS: —Yeah.

LEWISOHN: —He’s still charming. He’s— I mean he’s not horrible. He’s just —yeah— he’s just edgy!

--

On December 31st John’s “Battina” might indeed be beguiling, but on the 28th nothing is fucking “edgy” and it’s certainly not “charming.” It’s a dysfunctional family at Cracker Barrel desperately trying to get dad to stop screaming at the waitress.

But what is clear from the first moment to the last is that Paul is the conductor. At first John is just shambolic and a little wild, and Paul seems fairly relaxed, but it changes. All the sounds of everyone change as John unravels. There are times when I can just see Ringo, George and Paul looking at each other, and although Paul is the one who is landing the plane, it feels so much like a team effort.

(John, playing out the cycle that would become so familiar, has shaped up and is on his best behavior on the 31st and the band sounds great.)

I think we need to realize that this was just the dynamic. This is by far not John at his worst. By all accounts this was one of John’s best behaved Hamburg trips. It was a short trip, they had real bedrooms and a real manager, and they had a future they didn’t want to screw up. All those “funny” stories about John wearing a toilet on his head and laying on the stage drunk just smudge out the three other people in the picture. How much fun was it for them? 

Derek Taylor says that one of the things that helped bring George back after he walked out of the “Get Back” sessions was Taylor going to him and saying, “Come back, don’t make Paul shoulder the burden of John all alone.” The tape from December 28th makes that so explicit. 

There is the whole separate issue of Lewisohn seeming to be a terrible listener. He listened to the NAGRAS like a tribute and has gotten so many things wrong about them in interviews that I hope someone else (wink, wink AKOM) will handle the mess, because I do not have a podcast and this ain’t the best format for lots of audio. But hearing Lewisohn gush about John being “edgy” in these recordings in that weird, fawning voice—and completely fail to see and hear what the band was going through—troubles me in a much deeper way than almost anything else regarding the man. How can anyone be that blind?

[respectthepetty]

Since I decided the best way to make it through Our Skyy 2 with minimal damage is to drink my way through it, welcome to the second round of

CockTails in the Skyy!

This week's drink is Sun & Stars to celebrate my two precious Sunflowers (JOONGDUNK!) in Star in My Mind:

gin & tonic (to balance the bitter and sweet of this pair's dynamic)

pineapple juice (for that beach vibe)

elder flower syrup and vanilla bean sugar on the rim to add to the sickly sugariness I know I'm in for

"You are every shade of yellow for me, Daonuea."

I made it strong because I already know what happens for SeanMaithee, and with no further tears to cry, let's get this wedding party started, so I can be properly upset.

Bottoms up!

That was a very Lana del Rey's "National Anthem" beginning: "I love him. I love him. I love him."

"How many times did you make me cry? How many times did you break my heart?" <- gin & tonic was the right choice

Too much sweetness (pineapple juice), but I think it will sort itself out with the looks Daonuea is giving right now

The water bottles are blurred, so I'm taking that as a sign to only drink alcohol for these episodes.

Sean and Maithee are too hugged up with each other for this to go the way I know it'll go. I'm already bitter <-gin & tonic was the ONLY choice

The dental students stay doing the most. Mork in Fish Upon the Sky was basically a one-man EMT, Ana in Love Mechanics and Future is checking everyone's temp, and now Kluen is saving all the girlies. Where are the future doctors at?! Coasting?

Hold on! Is Typhoon a future medical doctor? I thought he was a dentist too? Still Dr. Typhoon, but why aren't the doctors doing their volunteer hours in any show ever?!

Min's friend is ON THE GROUND and she is trying to flirt. Priorities, my girl.

Hearing Maithee say he has a date WITH A GIRL, just to hear "O Come All Ye Faithful" right afterwards got me effed up. This is chaotic.

Daonuea is still wearing that sunflower bracelet! Thank goodness for the product placement, so I could see it.

Palm and Kluen both telling their men that they are all they need in life is some real water sign bs. Where are my fire signs?!

Oh snaps! The first episode is already done!

More Sun & Stars for episode 2

Since I'm already a Bitter Body, I went heavy-handed with the gin and skipped the pineapple juice for the second episode. Good choice.

The scene going from Daonuea and Kluen being all lovey-dovey immediately to Typhoon looking at them in his feelings felt like a personal attack. Alexa, play Sam Smith's "I'm Not Here to Make Friends" 'cause "I NEED A LOVER!"

I legit stopped the show so I could hear that song, and now Phoon wants to confess he has someone. Another attack!

The friend group being disgusted by these two is the only appropriate response.

Kluen is being a damn water sign again with his response about how he would feel if they never meet again. You are both 10s, sir! Start acting like it! I just need one of these Bl boys to pop off like Cardi B - "I'm a boss bitch! Who you gonna leave me for?"

There is ham and cheese in the spaghetti. Is that a thing?

"Why did you two stop fighting?" - Because they joined the music club and exchanged colors, duh.

I cannot be rational about JoongDunk. I CANNOT!

Prince was too busy talking to his time-traveling boyfriend in Midnight Museum to film a cameo, I see.

Everyone walking away from Pawin is why I'm a captain of the "Pawin's Milkshake Brings All the Boys to the Yard" step team

Daonuea saying Noel is hard to approach is SLANDER!

Kluen is salty like them Lay's chip GMMTV snatched from WinTeam and Between Us with all these boys in his room.

I'm so glad Typhoon and Daonuea can be friends too considering the violence that ensued last time.

God, I miss the (unnecessary) drama.

I noticed this on The Warp Effect, but Joong stays looking soft yet sensual.

Where is King's mom from Bed Friend to dunk on this ring? Because this ain't it, sir. Is the star a sapphire? Is the center of the sunflower a pearl? Diamond? ¿Qué es esto?

Rose petals are romantic and all, but let's stick to the theme. Where are the sunflower petals?!

What in the Blair Witch Project was that tree lantern thing?

Kluen saying he used up all his luck snagging Daonuea is so . . . he is a Cancer? A Pisces?! WHAT IS THIS?! He was not laying it on this thick in the show.

Oh, thank goodness, it ended right when I ran out of gin.

For the rating, the drink and the episodes were too sweet, yet somehow still very bitter because no SeanMaithee. I got JoongDunk, a proposal, and alcohol, so I'll take my wins where I can get them.

7/10 CockTails for doing its job but being bittersweet.

I'm going to have to make my Jack Nasty much stronger than I planned for next week's episodes of The Eclipse considering we are getting that strange teacher/student relationship.

"this is a god damn bitch of an unsatisfactory situation"

[forest-falcon]

Another extract from my WIP.

If I ever get around to finishing it, I'll pop them all in order!

Had fun writing cheesy villain lines.

OC: Lieutenant Tamara Fielding, a firefighter from Fire Chief Cass McCready's fire station.

Content Warning for whump and mild language.

***

"My dear Tanusha."

"Uncle."

"You have no idea how much it irks me to see your talents wasted upon these people."

"On the contrary, I am very much aware, and I relish it!"

The Hood chuckled.

"There's that Kyrano fire I adore!"

"Now, I have been patient. I've allowed you to have your fun..."

"How very generous of you."

"... But whatever your childish preoccupation is with these people; it ends now. You're coming with me."

"No."

"I wasn't asking."

"Good, because we're done talking."

Kayo turned to leave but found herself encircled by mechas.

The security operative smiled and formed her fighting stance.

"Always with the drama!"

"Well, it wouldn't do to make things too easy now, would it?

The Hood gave a nod and the machines advanced, sparking ominously as they approached.

There were too many. Six, maybe seven? One was handful enough.

None of the strategies flitting through her head would prove sufficient for taking them all on.

The sound of boots on rubble, and Lieutenant Fielding suddenly appeared brandishing a metal pole.

"Hey, Dumbass! She said no!"

"How quaint, you brought your little firefighter friend to play?"

The Hood turned to address the Lieutenant.

"My Dear, was that meant to wound me? Because I’ve been called a lot worse by far more powerful adversaries."

Fielding shrugged.

"Figures."

The Hood inspected his fingernails.

"As entertaining as this little interlude has been; I'm ready for the main event. Bring my niece to me. Dispose of the others how you will."

The jet's boosters fired, leaving a heavy cloud of dust in place of where the tyrant had stood moments before.

Kayo spared no time, using the temporary cover to her advantage. Snatching the pole from the Lieutenant, she rammed it through the nearest mecha's circuit board. The machine flailed, toppled, and crushed another in it's wake.

Kayo ran and scaled the felled scorpion. If she could just get to its stinger, they'd stand a fighting chance.

She reached it and began stamping on a coupling to free the weapon. It began to loosen.

Through the dust, a large shadow appeared. The security operative was out of time. A mechanical claw collided with the back of her head and Kayo's world went black.

The mechas advanced towards the unconscious figure, unwittingly presenting the Lieutenant with the option to escape.

For the briefest of moments, the firefighter dithered; wiping a trace of blood from her brow as she pondered the clearing.

A glance behind her confirmed that the IR operative was still out cold.

"Dammit"

Wrenching the pole free from the mecha; she swung it wildly at the remaining robots.

"You can't have her!" She snarled.

The scorpion drones turned, abandoning Kayo and started upon their new path towards the Lieutenant.

"Shit!"

Now, Lieutenant Tamara Fielding, was athletically fit by the average person's standards, but her skills in self-defence were limited to the basic bojutsu moves she had acquired as a teen in after-school club. The metal pole was a world away from the rattan staff she had once used, and the mechas would have likely wiped the floor with her coach.

"Lieutenant, come in?"

"Bit busy with these bots Chief! I have four tracking me now."

"Where's Kayo?"

"Unconscious."

Fielding dodged a lurch from the nearest mecha. Bringing the pole down heavily, the firefighter succeeded in damaging it's right claw. Electricity sparked from the exposed wires and the creature retreated to the back of its pack.

"We're en route to you now. Any injuries?"

"Can't...urgh...tell!" Tamara swiped at two which were splitting forces, herding her back towards a wall.

"Casualty appears...to be...breathing. Took...blow to her...head!"

Tamara suddenly felt cool concrete press against her back.

"We're two minutes from your location now."

Tamara could hear their heavy breathing over Comms. Help was coming.

But the two mechas were now four and had her completely surrounded.

At this point the remaining minutes between her and her rescuers may as well have been days. It didn't matter. It was too late.

Still, if she was going to go down, she would do so fighting. She could buy Kayo time for the others to reach her at least.

With all the strength her exhausted body possessed, she swung out at the mechanical assailants.

Mecha Two caught the pole mid-swing.

"Sorry Chief. Don't think I was quite fast enough today."

A white hot punch to her abdomen stole her breath away.

"Lieutenant Fielding?"

Her knees collided with the unforgiving ground.

"Lieutenant Fielding? Report!"

And her world tipped sideways.

"TAM?"

"SHIT!"

[helianskies]

“i won't leave you." with russpa

you know what. i've had an idea... cardverse, anyone? 👀

Treachery

The council is dismissed. Plans have been established, orders have been given, and when the sun rises tomorrow, horses and soldiers shall ride off in the direction of Spades.

It is too late to withdraw their declaration now.

As the room empties of ministers and miscreants, only two figures eventually remain. One sits in his chair at the head of the table, exhausted from the talks; the other has lurked in the shadows for the entire council gathering and only now, as their privacy becomes concrete, does he move away from the doors he has guarded to stand at the other’s side.

One is Ivan, King of Clubs. The other is Antonio, Ace of Diamonds—a long way from home, yet precisely where he needs to be.

“So,” the Ace begins, his hand settling on the back of Ivan’s chair, “how do you feel that went?”

The other gives a light scoff. “As well as any such gathering can go.”

“But you still believe that this is the right thing to do?”

“I do.”

“Good. That’s good,” Antonio determines with a smile that imbues him with a sense of pride and relief.

He moves his hand to Ivan’s shoulder, wanting to share such feelings with him. In turn, Ivan’s hand drifts up and gently settles down on top of Antonio’s, which makes the Ace only happier. To think, it was only a year ago that they first stood in this room alone together—that he and Ivan started to get to know each other beyond their official titles…

Antonio shouldn’t be there. Not really. Francis believes he is in Clubs to oversee talks so that he can return to Diamonds with the information, the decisions, and the insight that will help their own kingdom decide whether neutrality or belligerence is best. In truth, however, he is there for Ivan—to make sure Ivan goes ahead, that Clubs’ plans are fully fleshed out, and to provide strategic, moral, and more… personal support to the king.

(The rest of the Clubs royals were dismissed with the council. Similarly to Francis, they believe he is there to help them, to support them, and to potentially convince Diamonds to join their effort. Maybe he still will. Or, maybe he won’t…)

He brushes the back of his fingers against the other’s cold cheek. “I have faith that this will work,” Antonio remarks, fingers becoming a hand when Ivan starts to lean into the touch (how can he resist?). “Spades have much to answer for. If this is what it takes for them to finally see the damage they have done and the bridges they have burnt, then so be it.”

Ivan hums. He lifts Antonio’s hand from his face and brings it in front of him, pressing a kiss to his knuckles. The tenderness used to surprise him—it is so unexpected of a man so outwardly intimidating as Ivan—but now, he relishes in it, adores it, misses it when he is away.

“It is a shame,” the king says, “that you will have to go tomorrow. If it weren’t for this war, I would invite you to stay for longer than planned.”

“Well,” Antonio replies, taking up residence on the other’s broad lap, “I don’t have to go, I suppose…”

Ivan smiles, feeble, unsure, though he still holds Antonio, who duly rests his arm around the other’s shoulders. He says, “But you do. Your king is waiting for you; you have a duty to him and to your kingdom to return,” with a solemnity about him.

“I won’t leave you,” Antonio tells him, however. “Not if you do not want me to.”

“You will hardly stay if I have to go to war.”

“Your men will go to war. You will stay here, at least until a chance at victory appears,” the Ace insists. “Until then, we cannot risk our most important piece. If they got their hands on you so soon, it would… It would be catastrophic.”

Yet, Ivan does not worry about himself. He does not worry about what would become of himself if he were to fall into enemy hands. Rather, his smile holds, and with his fingertips he finds Antonio’s face—finds the scar that strikes down across his eye and into his cheek—which becomes the subject of his affection.

No one else is allowed to touch his face, at risk of losing their hand. But when Ivan does it, Antonio's hatred dies, and in its place is born a sort of peace. That is, a peace that interferes with his desire for revenge, yet one that… makes living easier. It is such a rare, curious feeling.

"Whatever happens," Ivan goes on to say, "I will make sure that Spades pay for what they did to you and your home. As you said, they have much to answer for, and I will pry those answers from them with my own bare hands if I must."

The sentiment is warming. It is as though he has not a king but a knight in his grasp, a fighter willing to do anything for him, even at the expense of his own life. Antonio has to make use of that while he can; when Clubs goes to war tomorrow, Diamonds will not follow. He needs Ivan. He needs Ivan to fight for him and his dignity.

But, if Ivan should do the unthinkable and fail him, then his use will unfortunately expire, and Antonio will have to explore other his options.

Francis has been easy enough to persuade to his whims in the past. As for Ludwig, well… Antonio is not one to back down from a challenge. He always finds a way in the end.

[ final wordcount, 953 words! ]

[findingtarshish]

Chapter 4: The Evening After

In the aftermath of Harmony losing control for the first time, she and Olivia meet via online chat room to discuss what happened. But this is the age of the Second Inquisition, and they'll have to be vague to avoid breaking the Masquerade. Sounds like there may be exciting things in the future for these two vampires?

Written by @jasina85 and myself!

For reference: Harmony's username is LibraryPasteEater, and Olivia's username is TheDoctorIsIn. In addition, they euphemistically refer to the Bahari as "Ripped Book Club" as an allusion to the fact that Harmony's first edition copy of Revelations of the Dark Mother is stripped and very damaged. Similarly, they refer to the Book of Nod as "Black Book" as a reference to the ornate copy of the text gifted to Harmony by the Lasombra Andre LaRue.

> User:LibraryPasteEater has joined

> User:TheDoctorIsIn has joined

> LibraryPasteEater: Hey

> TheDoctorIsIn: Hallo

> TheDoctorIsIn: How are you feeling?

> TheDoctorIsIn: I’ve been worried about you

> TheDoctorIsIn: I realize how I must have made you feel :(

> LibraryPasteEater: Im ok

> LibraryPasteEater: im more worried about you

> LibraryPasteEater: how are you doing

> TheDoctorIsIn: I’m fine

> TheDoctorIsIn: Mostly done cleaning the apartment now

> LibraryPasteEater: are you still hurt?

> TheDoctorIsIn: Yes, but I will be fine

> TheDoctorIsIn: Please don’t worry about me

> TheDoctorIsIn: I will be fine

> LibraryPasteEater: after what i did to you..

> LibraryPasteEater: if you dont want to see me anymore i understand

> TheDoctorIsIn: Why would I not want to see you?

> TheDoctorIsIn: It was just a sweater

> TheDoctorIsIn: Ok, bad joke

> TheDoctorIsIn: Harmony it’s alright

> TheDoctorIsIn: I may be hurt, but it wasn’t your fault

> TheDoctorIsIn: Besides, I’m used to that

> TheDoctorIsIn: I’m taking my lessons from it

> LibraryPasteEater: still. I am so so sorry

> LibraryPasteEater: im not usually like this. i promise

> TheDoctorIsIn: I know

> TheDoctorIsIn: You’re a good person

> TheDoctorIsIn: It was just an accident

> TheDoctorIsIn: Nothing of significance was damaged

> LibraryPasteEater: except u. youre significant

> TheDoctorIsIn: That’s debatable

> LibraryPasteEater: :(

> TheDoctorIsIn: But thank you

> TheDoctorIsIn: And I do hope I can come over soon

> TheDoctorIsIn: I’ve become quite engrossed in the book :) 

> TheDoctorIsIn: Harmony

> TheDoctorIsIn: I’m sorry

> LibraryPasteEater: dont apologize

> TheDoctorIsIn: Too late, I just did

> LibraryPasteEater: :(

> LibraryPasteEater: youre not the one who

> LibraryPasteEater: well

> LibraryPasteEater: you know

> TheDoctorIsIn: I kind of am

> TheDoctorIsIn: If I didn’t cause a scene back then

> TheDoctorIsIn: If I wasn’t stupid and just texted you back

> TheDoctorIsIn: You’d never have come over

> TheDoctorIsIn: You wouldn’t have stayed over

> TheDoctorIsIn: And

> TheDoctorIsIn: You wouldn’t have known

> LibraryPasteEater: i guess

> LibraryPasteEater: i dont want us to grab for blame like this

> TheDoctorIsIn: Then don’t

> TheDoctorIsIn: Accept that you aren’t to blame

> LibraryPasteEater: i dont know

> LibraryPasteEater: im still having a hard time with it

> LibraryPasteEater: i talked to my sister and that helped but

> LibraryPasteEater: its just not easy to accept yknow?

> TheDoctorIsIn: Believe me, I do

> TheDoctorIsIn: And I know it will take time

> TheDoctorIsIn: Also - sister?

> TheDoctorIsIn: I didn’t know you had a sister

> TheDoctorIsIn: But I’m glad she was able to help

> LibraryPasteEater: yeah i dont talk about my family much with our sort

> LibraryPasteEater: obvious reasons

> LibraryPasteEater: but Melodys my little sister

> LibraryPasteEater: she’s really important to me

> LibraryPasteEater: and im worried about her

> LibraryPasteEater: seems like shes going through something but wouldnt say what. Said shed be in town soon too so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ idk what im gonna do about that

> LibraryPasteEater: She doesnt know

> LibraryPasteEater: i dont know how im going to hide it

> TheDoctorIsIn: I understand

> TheDoctorIsIn: Let me know if I can help

> TheDoctorIsIn: Even though I’m not good with people

> TheDoctorIsIn: Speaking of people

> TheDoctorIsIn: French K hasn’t knocked on my door yet so

> LibraryPasteEater: FRENCH K LMAO

> TheDoctorIsIn: What am I supposed to call her?!

> TheDoctorIsIn: I’m guessing she doesn’t know?

> LibraryPasteEater: yeah i didnt tell her

> TheDoctorIsIn: I figured

> TheDoctorIsIn: Though you said it yourself

> TheDoctorIsIn: She’ll figure it out

> TheDoctorIsIn: And that’s going to make things

> TheDoctorIsIn: Problematic

> LibraryPasteEater: itll be ok

> TheDoctorIsIn: I wish I had that confidence

> LibraryPasteEater: shes to busy talking to welsh c to worry about you

> TheDoctorIsIn: Welsh C?

> LibraryPasteEater: french K’s “mom”

> LibraryPasteEater: shes old enough to know how to get though things like this

> LibraryPasteEater: theyre trying to reassure me

> LibraryPasteEater: not sure i believe it but

> LibraryPasteEater: im trying

> TheDoctorIsIn: Oh

> TheDoctorIsIn: So

> TheDoctorIsIn: Extended family?

> LibraryPasteEater: mhm

> LibraryPasteEater: shes nice i met her last year

> TheDoctorIsIn: Do I need to worry about her too?

> TheDoctorIsIn: I mean

> TheDoctorIsIn: Not implying anything but

> TheDoctorIsIn: You know

> TheDoctorIsIn: I know I worry about this a lot

> TheDoctorIsIn: But I kinda have to

> LibraryPasteEater: even if she knew C wouldnt hold it against you

> TheDoctorIsIn: No offense

> TheDoctorIsIn: But I find that hard to believe

> LibraryPasteEater: when i say shes nice shes REALLY nice

> TheDoctorIsIn: Even nice people tend to take issue with that

> TheDoctorIsIn: Look

> TheDoctorIsIn: I’m just scared

> LibraryPasteEater: she does have history with your folks

> TheDoctorIsIn: Not encouraging

> LibraryPasteEater: but she wouldnt hurt you

> LibraryPasteEater: its more

> LibraryPasteEater: your folks club if you catch my drift

> LibraryPasteEater: she was one of them once

> TheDoctorIsIn: WHAT

> TheDoctorIsIn: Past tense?

> TheDoctorIsIn: I thought these things 

> TheDoctorIsIn: Generally didn’t go past tense

> LibraryPasteEater: kinda hard to explain without buzzwords

> LibraryPasteEater: actually theres going to be an event in a little bit

> LibraryPasteEater: shell be in town

> LibraryPasteEater: want to meet her?

> TheDoctorIsIn: Well

> TheDoctorIsIn: On one hand

> TheDoctorIsIn: The more I hear of your family

> TheDoctorIsIn: The more I want to go

> TheDoctorIsIn: OMG ADOPT ME PLZ

> TheDoctorIsIn: But on the other

> TheDoctorIsIn: Still kinda scared of

> TheDoctorIsIn: You know

> TheDoctorIsIn: Being past tense

> LibraryPasteEater: she literally does that

> LibraryPasteEater: adopt i mean

> LibraryPasteEater: i think youd like her

> TheDoctorIsIn: Is she also a

> TheDoctorIsIn: You know

> TheDoctorIsIn: Uhhh

> TheDoctorIsIn: Actually

> TheDoctorIsIn: How do I say this

> TheDoctorIsIn: Book club?

> LibraryPasteEater: which book

> LibraryPasteEater: black book or ripped book?

> TheDoctorIsIn: Ripped book

> LibraryPasteEater: yes

> TheDoctorIsIn: I’d be surprised

> TheDoctorIsIn: If she was black book

> LibraryPasteEater: yeah we dont talk to those people

> TheDoctorIsIn: I mean

> TheDoctorIsIn: You talked to me

> TheDoctorIsIn: I kinda was?

> TheDoctorIsIn: I think I was black book by default?

> TheDoctorIsIn: I honestly don’t know

> TheDoctorIsIn: But I’m not ripped book

> LibraryPasteEater: thats fine

> LibraryPasteEater: theyre not gonna hold it against you

> LibraryPasteEater: you havent finished reading tho so

> LibraryPasteEater: god i sound like a youth pastor

> LibraryPasteEater: SORRY

> TheDoctorIsIn: It’s a long book

> TheDoctorIsIn: Also LMAO

> TheDoctorIsIn: Prettier than a youth pastor tho :) 

> LibraryPasteEater: >.<

> TheDoctorIsIn: My point is

> TheDoctorIsIn: I’m just kinda tired

> TheDoctorIsIn: Of being alone

> TheDoctorIsIn: Black book sucked

> TheDoctorIsIn: The middle-ground kinda sucks too

> TheDoctorIsIn: Ripped book seems cool

> LibraryPasteEater: if slightly fucked up at times

> TheDoctorIsIn: True

> TheDoctorIsIn: I don’t want to seem

> TheDoctorIsIn: Too desperate

> LibraryPasteEater: nono its ok!!

> LibraryPasteEater: i mean if you want to learn more about it

> LibraryPasteEater: the event is a good place to start

> TheDoctorIsIn: Well

> TheDoctorIsIn: I like learning

> TheDoctorIsIn: Is there a dresscode?

> TheDoctorIsIn: Are people gonna stare if I rent again?

> LibraryPasteEater: um

> LibraryPasteEater: well

> LibraryPasteEater: the dress code is optional

> LibraryPasteEater: this is

> LibraryPasteEater: shall we say um

> LibraryPasteEater: one of those dance naked in the woods affairs

> TheDoctorIsIn: the

> TheDoctorIsIn: what

> TheDoctorIsIn: affairs

> TheDoctorIsIn: ok

> TheDoctorIsIn: that is

> TheDoctorIsIn: um

> TheDoctorIsIn: yknow

> TheDoctorIsIn: I have very few words

> TheDoctorIsIn: Actually I have very many

> TheDoctorIsIn: Struggling to arrange them

> LibraryPasteEater: its totally safe i did it last year

> LibraryPasteEater: thought it would be cold but i dont really feel that anymore!

> TheDoctorIsIn: Ok so

> TheDoctorIsIn: Should probably heal first

> TheDoctorIsIn: Or failing that

> TheDoctorIsIn: Just do something about it

> LibraryPasteEater: you dont have to do dress code

> LibraryPasteEater: nobody will think less of you for it

> LibraryPasteEater: bunch of my friends wont be

> TheDoctorIsIn: Ok so just

> TheDoctorIsIn: Dress for the outdoors is fine?

> TheDoctorIsIn: I can do that

> LibraryPasteEater: mostly its just book club that will be doing that

> TheDoctorIsIn: Ok

> TheDoctorIsIn: When is it happening?

> TheDoctorIsIn: And is it really ok for you to invite me?

> LibraryPasteEater: next week

> LibraryPasteEater: and yeah ill just have to run it past Kath

> TheDoctorIsIn: Oh

> TheDoctorIsIn: Hmmm

> TheDoctorIsIn: As good a time as any to tell her?

> LibraryPasteEater: NONONO

> LibraryPasteEater: I think that is a conversation that should happen fully clothed

> TheDoctorIsIn: I don’t disagree

> TheDoctorIsIn: But you know I can’t lie

> TheDoctorIsIn: And if she asks

> TheDoctorIsIn: Well

> LibraryPasteEater: she wont

> LibraryPasteEater: Oh wait

> LibraryPasteEater: ah shit

> TheDoctorIsIn: which part?

> LibraryPasteEater: unrelated part

> LibraryPasteEater: mels gonna be in town next week

> LibraryPasteEater: this just makes things more complicated :T

> TheDoctorIsIn: Well shit

> TheDoctorIsIn: We’ll figure something out

> LibraryPasteEater: i can just tell her im busy but

> LibraryPasteEater: seems a little cold for my own sister

> TheDoctorIsIn: Think you can’t do both?

> TheDoctorIsIn: Well

> TheDoctorIsIn: Event sounds semi-regular

> TheDoctorIsIn: Sister a bit less so

> TheDoctorIsIn: So if you have to choose

> LibraryPasteEater: ill manage dw

> TheDoctorIsIn: ok

> TheDoctorIsIn: I guess you'll tell me more when you have a plan?

> LibraryPasteEater: yep

> LibraryPasteEater: details in person though

> LibraryPasteEater: not putting anything about it online

> TheDoctorIsIn: Obviously

> TheDoctorIsIn: I thought that was implied

> TheDoctorIsIn: Let me know when I should come over then

> TheDoctorIsIn: Actually

> TheDoctorIsIn: Look I get if you don’t want to talk about it

> TheDoctorIsIn: But who the hell was that guy?

> TheDoctorIsIn: I’ve never seen you so shaken up

> LibraryPasteEater: oh

> LibraryPasteEater: hes

> LibraryPasteEater: hes my ex

> TheDoctorIsIn: Oh

> TheDoctorIsIn: I’m gonna guess

> TheDoctorIsIn: He didn’t quite get the ex part

> TheDoctorIsIn: Did he?

> LibraryPasteEater: he

> LibraryPasteEater: i dont know

> LibraryPasteEater: i thought everything was fine

> LibraryPasteEater: then i tried to confide in him about something and he started just

> LibraryPasteEater: started treating me horribly

> LibraryPasteEater: I thought i could trust him 

> LibraryPasteEater: that he could help me though it

> LibraryPasteEater: but I guess he never really cared about me that way

> TheDoctorIsIn: Sounds like a real asshole

> TheDoctorIsIn: What the hell is wrong with him?

> TheDoctorIsIn: Or more to the point

> TheDoctorIsIn: Why don’t you just call the cops on him?

> TheDoctorIsIn: He’s very clearly stalking you

> LibraryPasteEater: you know why i cant

> LibraryPasteEater: not to mention

> LibraryPasteEater: he has connections

> LibraryPasteEater: theyd believe him not me

> TheDoctorIsIn: Ok so

> TheDoctorIsIn: If the legal angle isn’t available

> TheDoctorIsIn: Why not just ask someone else?

> TheDoctorIsIn: Sorry if I’m presuming too much

> TheDoctorIsIn: But I can think of someone who would

> LibraryPasteEater: k offered

> LibraryPasteEater: hell my dad offered

> LibraryPasteEater: but i cant

> LibraryPasteEater: i cant bring myself to hurt him

> LibraryPasteEater: its not who i am

> TheDoctorIsIn: I’m not saying hurt him

> TheDoctorIsIn: Even if after that night

> TheDoctorIsIn: I very much would not be opposed to that

> TheDoctorIsIn: But I’m sure k has

> TheDoctorIsIn: She is very talented

> TheDoctorIsIn: And it almost sounds like he suspects something

> LibraryPasteEater: i know

> LibraryPasteEater: but im scared if we go after him itll only confirm what he thinks

> LibraryPasteEater: you dont know how smart he is

> TheDoctorIsIn: Look

> TheDoctorIsIn: I just don’t want to see you hurt

> TheDoctorIsIn: And I can see it plain as day

> TheDoctorIsIn: He’s hurting you Harmony :( 

> LibraryPasteEater: i know

> LibraryPasteEater: you have no idea

> TheDoctorIsIn: Please don’t take this the wrong way

> TheDoctorIsIn: But the longer this goes on, the worse it will get

> TheDoctorIsIn: I know people like him

> TheDoctorIsIn: They’re like sharks

> TheDoctorIsIn: Once he smells blood, he’s not gonna let go

> LibraryPasteEater: believe me i know

> TheDoctorIsIn: I just want to help you Harmony

> LibraryPasteEater: maybe im just weak

> LibraryPasteEater: but i dont know what to do to solve it

> LibraryPasteEater: but this isnt your problem

> LibraryPasteEater: you dont need to do anything for me

> TheDoctorIsIn: Nonsense

> TheDoctorIsIn: You’re my friend

> TheDoctorIsIn: Friends help eachother out

> TheDoctorIsIn: I may not know how just yet

> TheDoctorIsIn: But we’ll figure something out

> TheDoctorIsIn: And please

> TheDoctorIsIn: He knows where I live now

> TheDoctorIsIn: He very much went and made himself my problem

> TheDoctorIsIn: Ugh

> TheDoctorIsIn: Why is nothing ever straightforward?

> LibraryPasteEater: to be fair

> LibraryPasteEater: things not being straightforward was how this mess started with him

> TheDoctorIsIn: He is really starting to remind me of someone

> TheDoctorIsIn: And I do not like where that comparison is going

> LibraryPasteEater: oh

> LibraryPasteEater: im sorry i didnt mean to dredge up memories

> TheDoctorIsIn: You didn’t, so no apologizing

> LibraryPasteEater: too late i just did

> TheDoctorIsIn: Ey!

> TheDoctorIsIn: That’s my line! :( 

> TheDoctorIsIn: You can’t just steal my lines!

> LibraryPasteEater: clearly i can!

> LibraryPasteEater: the point is

> LibraryPasteEater: please dont do anything rash

> LibraryPasteEater: i know i have no place to talk after what i did but

> LibraryPasteEater: that thing with the eyes??? that was reckless

> TheDoctorIsIn: Thing with the eyes?

> LibraryPasteEater: you were uh

> LibraryPasteEater: seeing red

> LibraryPasteEater: if you catch my drift

> TheDoctorIsIn: What?

> TheDoctorIsIn: I don’t understand

> TheDoctorIsIn: I didn’t notice anything different

> TheDoctorIsIn: I mean

> TheDoctorIsIn: A light came on in the hallway but that was it

> LibraryPasteEater: i dont know what it was

> LibraryPasteEater: its definitely not something i can do

> LibraryPasteEater: also the light in the hallway did not turn on what are you talking about

> TheDoctorIsIn: But it got brighter

> TheDoctorIsIn: It wasn’t as dark

> TheDoctorIsIn: I’m not going crazy, am I?

> LibraryPasteEater: i did not see that

> LibraryPasteEater: maybe it had to do with the eye thing

> LibraryPasteEater: is that somthing you can do?

> TheDoctorIsIn: Apparently I have an eye thing now?

> LibraryPasteEater: apparently!

> LibraryPasteEater: its a bit scary

> LibraryPasteEater: and definitely looks uhhhhh

> LibraryPasteEater: not normal shall we say

> TheDoctorIsIn: That’s concerning

> TheDoctorIsIn: I best figure out what it is

> TheDoctorIsIn: And if I can do something about it

> TheDoctorIsIn: Besides

> TheDoctorIsIn: I think red eyes kind of ruin my look?

> TheDoctorIsIn: It just doesn’t seem like me

> LibraryPasteEater: i agree

> LibraryPasteEater: i like ur normal eyes :)

> TheDoctorIsIn: Thanks :) 

> TheDoctorIsIn: I like your eyes too :) 

> TheDoctorIsIn: Ok this might be

> TheDoctorIsIn: Officially the weirdest I phrased a compliment

> TheDoctorIsIn: In my life

> LibraryPasteEater: lol

> TheDoctorIsIn: The tattoo is pretty cool too

> LibraryPasteEater: how did you

> TheDoctorIsIn: :) 

> LibraryPasteEater: oh

> LibraryPasteEater: right

> LibraryPasteEater: i guess i was kinda. Not dressed

> LibraryPasteEater: sorry about sleeping in btw

> LibraryPasteEater: i just didnt really see the point of getting up early

> TheDoctorIsIn: It’s alright

> TheDoctorIsIn: Not like you’d have much to amuse yourself with

> TheDoctorIsIn: Aside from digging through my stuff I guess?

> LibraryPasteEater: what do you take me for maam

> TheDoctorIsIn: The lady doth protest too much :3 

> LibraryPasteEater: DONT YOU FCCKING SHKAESPEAR ME

> TheDoctorIsIn: In all seriousness

> TheDoctorIsIn: I didn’t expect you would

> TheDoctorIsIn: Maybe the night before?

> LibraryPasteEater: i didnt

> LibraryPasteEater: all i did after you went to bed was a short prayer

> TheDoctorIsIn: Hey, it’s fine

> TheDoctorIsIn: I may not exactly be religious

> TheDoctorIsIn: But far be it for me tell you what to do

> LibraryPasteEater: ik

> TheDoctorIsIn: “Not religious” she said, reading ripped book

> LibraryPasteEater: ok to be fair

> LibraryPasteEater: there is a whole PROCCESS beyond just reading the book

> LibraryPasteEater: knowledge is neutral!! Doesnt imply belief

> LibraryPasteEater: did for me but

> LibraryPasteEater: i just dont want you to feel pressured

> LibraryPasteEater: i grew up catholic i know what that can feel like

> TheDoctorIsIn: Don’t worry

> TheDoctorIsIn: I don’t feel pressured at all

> TheDoctorIsIn: Slightly encouraged maybe?

> TheDoctorIsIn: To explore my options at least

> LibraryPasteEater: im glad

> TheDoctorIsIn: Not Harmony? :3 

> LibraryPasteEater: -_-

> TheDoctorIsIn: Mistress of Humor, lest you forget

> LibraryPasteEater: careful or im gonna die of laughter again

> TheDoctorIsIn: Please don’t

> TheDoctorIsIn: I’ve had enough cleaning for a while

> LibraryPasteEater: ok thats fair

> TheDoctorIsIn: And I’d be sad :( 

> LibraryPasteEater: i might want to go soon tho?

> LibraryPasteEater: getting a bit hungry

> TheDoctorIsIn: That’s alright

> TheDoctorIsIn: I should probably change my bandages

> TheDoctorIsIn: It’s been long enough

> TheDoctorIsIn: I know

> TheDoctorIsIn: Not super intuitive

> TheDoctorIsIn: It just makes me feel better when I do

> User:LibraryPasteEater hugs User:TheDoctorIsIn

> TheDoctorIsIn: :) 

> User:TheDoctorIsIn hugs User:LibraryPasteEater

> LibraryPasteEater: see you in a bit?

> TheDoctorIsIn: Yeah!

> TheDoctorIsIn: Enjoy your meal!

> User:LibraryPasteEater has disconnected

> User:TheDoctorIsIn has disconnected

[90363462]

Pusha T Breaks Down “Story Of Adidon,” Says Drake Got What Was Coming Once He Said His Fianceé’s Name, “All Bets Are Off Because Of That”

Bossip

WENN/Euan Cherry

Pusha T Calls The Breakfast Club About His Drake Diss

If you were feeling bad for Drake after Pusha T dropped “Story of Adidon,” you shouldn’t — at least that’s what Pusha T says. The rapper called into “The Breakfast Club” Wednesday to break down his bars and explained why he snapped. 

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When asked by the Power 105.1 morning team if he felt badly at all about the verbal assault (and photo exposure) of Drizzy, Pusha told the crew that once Drake said his fianceé, Virginia Williams’ name. 

“All bets are off because of that,” Pusha told The Breakfast Club. 

He went on to discuss the photo he’d used for the song after Angela Yee asked where he got the artwork. 

“The picture came from a site, it was a photographer named David Leyes. I guess Drake took the pictures a little while ago. They said it was his idea, what to do.”

Charlamagne then said that it’s likely Drake will be questioned about the photo wherever he goes now. 

“I need to understand what makes you take a picture like that,” Pusha agreed and when the trio added that the baby lines will also continue to haunt Drake, Pusha agreed with that as welll. “Even the baby thing is a little crazy. Who rolls out their child with a sweatsuit?” Push asked.

Envy, Angela and Charlamagne asked Push to further explain the Adidas situation and he had this to say:

“The Adidas situation is this. His new line on Adidas is called Adidon — the line is named after his child Adonis. We don’t know, we just know that we couldn’t know until he sold a sweatsuit.”

Angela then brought up how today is World MS Day, making the lines about Noah “40” Shehib that much more impactful. 

But Pusha remained unfazed.

“Ah man, that’s ironic. Listen man, I’m just here man, I’m here for the sport of it but when it gets too personal it gets too personal.”

When asked if he had any regrets or had censored himself at all Pusha said “Not at all. I’m not censoring myself, that’s just more content later.”

This battle really could go on and on! Mind you, Pusha isn’t fearful about what Drake may say about him next. 

“I’m a tell y’all like this,” Pusha said. “I don’t have any skeletons. I’m not gonna bully the situation but I think it’s bigger questions than the things I brought up and I really feel like they need to be answered. That’s really how I feel. I’m not gonna excuse you talking multi million dollar talk to me while you are tucking a baby. I don’t even talk to my friends who have child support issues. I’m big on kids. That’s just real. You can’t hang out with me and ball with me. That’s real.”

When talk returned to the blackface photos Pusha continued to question Drake’s judgment. 

“Listen cuz to me, I feel like this wasn’t so long ago,” Push told The Breakfast Club. ” Have you just started recognizing your blackness? How could you not have felt some type of way doing that photoshoot? It’s deep. I need to know.” 

Angela Yee then asked if Pusha knows for sure that Drake has actually fathered a baby, to which he responded, “Angela Yee, we done already tap danced around the ghostwriting, we not tap dancing around no baby.”

Charlamagne jumped in to say, “We not tap dancing at all because we not wearing no blackface.”

“And that’s a fact!” Pusha added.

The interview also shed some light on alleged Drake ghostwriter Quentin Miller, who has been collateral damage in several Drake related beefs. 

“I talked to Quentin last night,” Pusha told TBC. “For real for real, that is the one regret that I have about “Infrared.” Quentin is extremely talented and he’s trying to get his career on and trying to move on and I feel like I sort pulled him back in it. But I feel like that was just a casualty. For him, in turn I’ve tried to help him, reach out to agents and managers and I’ve seen how people react to his name. That’s one thing that’s bothersome. He was like, ‘You know I’m trying to duck that.’

As the interview came to a close Charlamagne cautioned Pusha, “Don’t sleep on Aubrey Push, don’t sleep, stay alert.”

“Bruh,” Push replied, “I’m wide awake.”

Are you loving this rap battle or do you think they’re going too far? 

Hit the flip for some related social media from Pusha T.