#theres some weird discourse going on rn

[eddieintheocean]

Reminder that dolphins are not inherently evil

You cannot apply human morals to any animal

Just as people call sharks evil or orcas evil or hippos evil

None of these animals have the ability to apply morals to situations like we can, they simply do the things that requires them to survive

Cetaceans are incredibly intelligent and social, but they still should not be deemed evil in the same way as we apply morals and good and evil to humans.

If sharks, dolphins, orcas and hippos are evil because they kill animals to eat them then maybe have a look at humans who have driven many marine animals to extinction

[artificialwizard]

Venting and rambling about ai art discourse

Feel free to ignore this + this isnt an invitation to argue back and forth with me about ai

My tag system on main for years now has been

#art = abstract art

#representational art = all non-abstract art

( + #dreamscape = art that can't be neatly categorized as abstract or representational + art that reminds me of dreaming )

Bc at the time I created this tag system i was very fed up with abstract art and modern art being dismissed as Not Real Art by some assholes and i wanted to put abstract art first in my space and have representational art be the one that needs a descriptor to differentiate it from "normal"/"real" art

Currently holding myself back from doing something similar to be petty about the never ending ai art backlash/discourse

Haven't been posting my abstract art or ai art online much lately but i still make a lot of both (+ getting back into writing and prob won't be posting much of that either). Sharing art online, other than with close friends, seems like hell to me rn.

Maybe someday i'll start posting my art again it just sucks that anytime i go on any social media from discord to youtube theres an 80% chance i see people shitting on the artistic mediums that i'm most passionate about

And its not like the ai hate train has slowed down the rancid attitudes around abstract art lol, not that I'd stop making AI art if abstract art was more respected

Abstract art is the easiest and most rewarding way for me to express myself creatively and it gels so well with my perfectionism issues bc perfection is Not the point (except when it is, but then its an artistic choice not a constant obligation for every piece). A piece about grief doesnt need to have perfect straight lines or symmetry, the art can be messy if it suits the tone I'm going for.

And AI image and music generation is very exciting to me! I've always been curious about what it would be like getting to see the creation of a new way of making art and its been very cool being able to somewhat follow AI innovations since 2018 and then get to experiment with it myself once more ai tools became accessible!!

Whether im the ai art im making is abstract or representational, i love not having full control over the result! I love bouncing ideas back and forth with the AI. I love having to combine my visual art skills and my language/description skills.

I use midjourney et al. the same way I'd make my OCs in dressup games while brainstorming ideas. Mindless doodling that can often lead to writers block breakthroughs.

I also use midjourney et al. to make quick vent art when I'm feeling strong emotions just like I'd do in my sketchbook or in my digital art apps.

And sometimes i'm using ai to spend hours trying to make something very specific i want to create.

Idk its all just tools to me. Midjourney. Paint Tool Sai. Pen and paper. I get the same joy/relief out of making art with all of the above

Im not aiming for fame or money, i make 0-200$ a year from art, usually 0. I just want to have a little corner of the internet to share my images and reach a handful of ppl who appreciate them and want to discuss abstract & ai art with me thats it. Im not coming for your art job, i dont allign myself with corporations aiming to further disadvantage workers in artistic industries or artists who freelance

Anyway reason #2 i slowed down on posting art is grief has been kicking my ass these past 4 years. Lots of deaths in the family + death of a friend. some relationships were fractured and im grieving those as well.

Reason #3 is started full time library job in november 🎉 its wonderful and its exhausting and im still finding my rythm after years of being chronically un(der)employed and/or in college, but hopefully once life settles down more ill have more and more time to spend on art and writing

Havent vent posted in ages and it feels weird doing it on one of my art blogs so im going to end this with two of my recent(ish) pieces on grief, first made in onelab (not ai, android art app i make 80% of my digital art in) and second in midjourney

Thanks if u read all/most/some of that :)

Think i just needed to be like "man this sucks" so i can move on to "anyway! Art time >:)"

[ginalinettiofficial]

im actually already sad about the terrible lives that the children who get cast in the pjo show are probably gonna have. like i know i know it’s exciting to see characters portrayed their canonical ages and shit but did we all forget that child actors generally tend not to fare so well??? they’re very susceptible to abuse, grooming, EDs, drug addiction, so many terrible things, and i think we forget that when demanding child actors so that our content can be more accurate to its source material.

i know no one is gonna read this post lmao i just wanted to vent i’m just so worried for these kids and i hope none of them suffer at all but, like, knowing what we know, and having seen disney channel stars come and go, sitting on a website that idolizes ppl like mara wilson and macauley caulkin whilst spreading around massively popular “awareness” posts about how terrible and abusive their lives were as child stars, i can’t help but feel like by being so fiercely in favor of a full cast of child actors (enough so that i’ve seen several long-time rick haters say things along the lines of “finally rick did something right!”) we’re ignoring the very real children who are going to sign up to sacrifice five years of their lives in order to work extremely intense schedules with little to no social life outside of the cast and crew in an industry famous for underage sex abuse scandals and unhealthy labor conditions just so that we can enjoy the artistic content they’ll be creating.

idk sorry to rant into the void yet again i just think it’s pretty naive and not the best idea to demand a cast of 8-14 year olds for the sake ~being faithful to source material~ when speaking from experience we /know/ that those children (who as we speak are maybe, what, 5 to 11 years old? in order to be old enough to play these roles by the time production begins) will for the most part be the next victims of a brutal and unforgiving industry that’s far more likely to chew them up and spit them out as fragile, unstable young adults who have no concept how to function as healthy human beings than it is to let them grow into stable happy healthy ppl, whilst creating this art for us.

[choco-style]

lately I’ve found myself mind yelling “shut the fuck up” more than usual and I don’t know who to talk to because there’s nothing anyone can do to stop it, I just have to wait to go to school and feel better, which is crazy because the general opinion on school is “god I hate it I just wanna go home” and that’s what I used to think too when I was in my awful 5-8 grade class

and it’s not just real life people I want to shut up, I feel like I’m getting more defensive and my favourite creators are getting called all kinds of things by people who claim to have the higher moral ground (or whatever you call it), when they themselves wish terrible things upon people who have either done nothing wrong, or who have apologized for everything they did wrong. and it’s 99% on tumblr. now I understand why no one fucking likes this site.

and I’m back again in this state where “I wanna go home” doesn’t at all refer to the actual apartment, but to a mentally happy place. and it sounds edgy when your brain says I wanna go home I wanna go home I wanna go home I wanna go home please shut the fuck up

this isn’t even that bad and it’s nothing serious and I don’t know how I feel about all this I just needed to let it out and tumblr is where I can write longass “diary entries” and very few people who I care about will read them, and if someone has a problem with them I don’t give a single shit about their feelings and I hope they get the help they need to not turn into a shitty person or worse.

ive also been kinda mean??like not quite but kinda??? i dont know i just feel like i peaked and now im just kinda there. but im not even in the neutral empty doorway kind of state, its like now im in the room but idk what i wanna do and i need to pee but theres no toilet and im just there. like how dreams feel sometimes,,,,, idk aaagh

during the first 5 days of the week i look forward to the weekend because that keeps me happy and good and nice but then the weekend is the worst part of every week and i look forward to going to school, and now i wont even have this escape because this is the last week were going to school this decade and i have to breathe the same air and hear the same sounds as my family and i dont want to, i wanna go to school and be distracted and plan out my evenings and mornings when im basically alone. or something. i dont know what im talking about. i just dont want winter break. i dont wanna talk to my family when theyre all together. whenever theres even two people from my family in the same room i feel like i want to cry and i end up wishing id made plans or something, anything just to be somewhere else. 

youtube videos arent working anymore. or they are, but not really. i can block out the sound partially but i can still hear other people. and i think its normal but also fucked up. “what is?” well thanks for asking, me in “ “s, having these people argue so much is common but fucked up, having to stop whatever ur doing just to check whether or not a family member is crying, only to find out theyre laughing, is fucked up but maybe common. wanting to be home alone is common and not fucked up i think. going into a mental crisis because youre in this eternal circle of being sad - amplifying it because ur an attention whore - realising ur an attention whore - instead of stopping, u amplify THIS to feel absolutely terrible except not really because its not real or is it - now ur making urself look like the victim of realising ur not the victim. jesus fucking christ u stop thinking about it and it happens again a while later. just shut the fuck up, me. shut the fuck up. make my brain shut the fuck up,  i would literally probably cry happy tears if someone could make me shut the fuck up forever. or maybe i wouldnt but right now i feel like im gonna cry thinking about it. or its just placebo. or not placebo, the negative one. or idk. maybe i was right the first time i dont know. and now my back hurts cuz im like a little bug or whatever im just writing like. reversed arched. i dont know how to explain it lmao. i dont wanna read this thiing ever again but i most likely will! yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! be happy lol u knwo the meme thats like cmon work. idk what it was but the reference is in my brain and i feel like i could use it. and now i sound weird. well not weird im just going thru the thing i explained earlier in this thing. but i wont write abt it im just gonna not think about it bc that seems to work really well. felt the need to add ^^ as if im talking to someone or maybe making my thoughts talk to me rn like how i would talk to someone irl lmao.theyve actually been silent for a while so idk.

id title this “if im being honest” to like show im trying to get my rthoughts out with no real filtering but aaah idk. i dont wanna do it bc the title would be like. bigger and semibold and itd draw attention to  it. i want this to not be read by people but maybe someone will. i have like 2 or 3 people in mind who would maybe maybe maybe read this but i dont know. its really not anything so you shouldnt read it. maybe someone could skim this. is that how you say it. also there is some filtering of my thoughts because i dont wanna name anyone im not looking for trouble i just wanna talk into the void and feel better and maybe this is really it. i do feel kind of relaxed now. my uhhh wrists, yeah thats what theyre fcalled, they kinda hurt and my fingers dont hurt but like, the joints are very,,,accentuated? but not like visually they just. i can conciously feel them? and my throat and kinda eyes? thats bc of almost kinda crying but lol idk. and like ive always hated accentuated feelings and i read this thing on wikipedia about sensory overload and idk if its a normal thing that happens like when something stings or hurts or if its a symptom of something or i dont know but ive always kinda joked about it and its also related to tics. ticks? ticks. tics. and its not really what im feeling rn but its a thing that happens sometimes. kind of. but like when u walk up the stairs and u feel ur right leg has been doing/making more effort pushing u up than ur left leg and u try to balance out the effort and it can be hurtful i guess bc if something like an eye or arm hurts u try to balance out the pain and that can be bad dont do that but like i can do it bc i wont do it in bad scenarios. i went off track lololol sorry

this is kind of what my mind speeches and discourses look like so yeah i hope this goes unnoticed or someone notices it and i can just say nah dude im good trust me because i am i think and u should maybe probably trust me bc usually i have it better than everyone i talk to online or in real life so its fine if u trust me because its nothing to worry about really. ur precious and u desrrve more attention than whatever this thingy is. take care of yourself. the only thing ur allowed to think about this post if u read it (or not but like sure), according to my selfish brain, is that oh wow its cool that u tried mimicking (??) ur thoufhts and id be lioke yeah haha i dont even know whats wriitten in here anymroe im cool like that hahahhahahhhhhhhahha hehe hoho hihi you know. so dont feel anything else than indifference and maybe admiration. i wouldnt say the former if this were something i put thought into but it isnt so enjoy! honesty. kinda.

[skoggiis]

got tagged by @nowprisoner-24601 😄 thank you, im having a hard time staying awake rn, so this helps pass the time!

Nickname: Just Cars, and now theres this inside joke that keeps going (proly past its death day) that all cars are my cousins, and that im going to die by someone yelling "CAR" and im gonna turn, thinking theyre talking to me, and get hit😅 i live in a small suburb, so nobody really acts threatened by cars, so its p likely

Gender: I go with whatever, most people go with she/her just cuz thats my birth one, i can confuse people pretty easily with a dress shirt and a tie tho!

Astrology: Im an Aries on the cusp of pisces!

height: 5'5" tho im still in the short range of my school...

sexuality: wlw? ace definitly, maybe aro? been ace aro for like 4 years, so i just stick with that

hogwarts house: even mix between slytherin and ravenclaw!

Fav animals: boxelder bugs, weird enough, i thought they were fireflies when i was a kid, and would protect them in the winter, now theyre just friendly faces to me!

Number of Blankets: as many as possible, i have a high heat tolerance, i wear plaids during the 90° temps around here a lot, and my cats sleep on any blankets any time they go into my room, so i have to have a lot so i have one to be in when i walk around my house

Where Im From: Would rather not say just cuz i still live in the same area :p

Dream Trip: Road trip to the East Coast tbh, id LOVE to see the Smithsonian, Broadway, New York, the ocean, all the colonial history, mountains, and road trips in general are a lotta fun with the right people, either coast would be great but west coast has plains for dsys and i think id go a bit crazy without seeing a forest for more than a couple hours, it feels not natural to not have ANY😖

When I created this account: Jesus, proly 2015? 2016? i dont wanna check cuz i know i reblogged cringey stuff and mobile makes that painfully slow anyways

Why I created this Account: i think my friend pushed me into it, cuz i hated instagram with a passion, and ifunny was too sexist and they showed me some funny posts from here, then i proly started using it regularly when i got into reylo when it was the hot new discourse

yeet idk who to tag cuz mobile wont let me turn this into a draft without posting so whoever wants to!

[wizardrat69]

ok im done fighting the urge to fill out 20 abt the blogger things in a row. let me have this

i found one from when i was 15 and im gonna do it again to compare bc im uhhh bored

LAYER ONE: THE OUTSIDE

Name: drew! tho im considering some other shit in addition

Eye color: blue... shit doesnt change :/

Hair style/color: its short and still red and frankly its a bit weird rn 

Height: 165 centimeters (5′4).......... @ my past self. you fucking wish you were me

Clothing style: androgynous slutty goth vacation dad is the IDEAL. but thats not always attainable 

Best physical feature: im just cute. :/

LAYER TWO: THE INSIDE

Your fears: pregnancy. gröss

Your guilty pleasure: really shitty music and like sexy designed evil ladies. but thats valid because im gay. also reading awful discourse and getting mad on purpose

Ambitions for the future: i want to be this guy

LAYER THREE: THOUGHTS

Your first thoughts waking up: i immediately got shanghai alice of meiji 17 stuck in my head. there was something vaguely music related before that but i forget 

What you think about most: whatever i happen to be hyperfixated on :/

What you think about before bed: gay thoughts 💖

LAYER FOUR: WHAT’S BETTER?

Single or group dates: single is classic but i support going out and being gay with your friends who are also gay 

To be loved or respected: LOVED...

Beauty or brains: pardonnez-moi... im a homo-morosexual

Dogs or cats: cats!!

LAYER FIVE: DO YOU.

Lie: nngfkjdh when im scared. i dont lie to my friends

Believe in yourself: yes and simultaneously well Not Really!

Believe in love: its one of the only things thats real actually.

Want someone: god you fucking KNOW it

LAYER SIX: EVER?

Been on stage: yea a few times but nothing like, huge

Done drugs: no but its because im pussy. also i have no friends whom drugs. and i also dont wanna get deported lol

Changed who you were to fit in: i tend to compromise myself a lot so people like me but ive been way better about not doing that lately

LAYER SEVEN: FAVORITES

Favorite color: red rn... changes a lot but its usually red/green

Favorite animal: cats... 

Favorite movie: alien but really theres not much competition 

Favorite show: jojo bizarreadventure. hyperfix aside i luv cowboy beboy

Favorite book: i can NOT read

LAYER EIGHT: AGE

Day your next birthday will be: feb 28th

How old will you be: 20 😰

Does age matter: yeah.

oh heres another one from when i was 15. frankly i am unstoppable now

Name: drew

Age: 19

Height: 165cm. etc

Relationship status: gays... i am in love

Birthday: feb 28

Favorite color: see above -__-

Favorite bands: THE MARS VOLTA if i go into lesser faves ill be here for an hour but im feeling rheostatics a lot this week i guess

Last song listened: studio killers - jenny 

Last movie watched: oceans thirteen 😊

# of pets: THREE cats

Best school subject: it was always english but i loved bio also

Cell phone type: samsung a5... old bitch

Current shirt color: gray with nasa logo :]

Gamer? i mean. i certainly have played a couple of video james in my time

Day or night? im a dawn/dusk lesbian

Summer or winter? uhhhh summer

Most-visited website? STILL tumblr. tragic

Celebrity crush(s): still none... i do not give a fuck 

Biggest turn on: epic cringe of me to answer this with aph norway like 4 years ago. anyways chaotic nature + boldness is really hot not to be rowdy and sort of a bottom

ANYWAYS the moral of the story? character development. other moral is that i need more hobbies im so fucking bored rn

[winking]

8

weird why u chose this number but then i remember isnt this ur favorite number..........sigh im tired ive been thinking abt chicken strips for a while now n if i go to the dining hall rn and there isnt none guess ill starve! but hello friend i love u :/ thank u for being my frien even tho i suck...... i like messaging u something but in general i dont talk to anyone thats why i dont do it often plus im probably gonna be busy soon :( but ill talk alot onr abbit dkjewn of if theres some discourse im glad we became mutuals and honestly its very easy to become friends w u even tho i dont kno anything abt video games its bc u didnt care but u gave effort and so did i and thats the difference between so many peoples like how u expect to become friends whne u never try.... whhy r people like this why arent more people like u what the...... anyways dont let people take advantage of ur niceness .... each day i feel more comfortable around u n believe it or not i miss u when ur not around :( sigh idk wat else to say... thanks for stanning the greatest kpop group they need all the support how does it feel to be a kpop blog i love u i didnt write alot bc again thinking abt food also im tired n i wanna nap sigh but i hope ur moving in goes well n u mesage me or update me once u get there

[i-amusemyself]

All Emoji Asks.

🐰 what is one secret youve never told anyone?I don't really have that many secrets. I guess theres a side of my personality that I spend a lot of energy supressing like hell that I hate with a passion.💗 if you could hug anyone, who would it be?Right now? My best friend right next to me or my friend back home.🐹 what are some of your favourite pokemons and why?I mean, I only ever played pokemon go, but from that I loved the squirtles and the evees just bc theyre cute af🌠 if you were in charge of the world what would it be like?A lot more chilled out. Chill pills would be mandatory.👀 what was the most recent vivid dream you had?Okay I had two freaking weird ones the other night?In one I was a 10 y/o muslim girl going to a new primary school and while I was there I started raising money for a cancer charity.In the other I was taking a really hard A level maths exam and getting stressed and mad bc everyone kept talking and I couldnt finish it in time.☀ what do you like most about your best friend?EVERYTHING?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! Idk, I guess how forgiving and layed back she is. She always tries to understand and see things from your point of view.😘 talk about your crush or partnerLmao I'm alone 😂 I do have a crush but its a million miles from mutual so like, shes amazing but boi it hurts 😂💁 if someone was rude to you would you be rude back?Depends on how well I know them and what they're like tbh. I'll banter, but I avoid confrontation.🌟 what do you like about yourself? (3 things)😂😂😂 wow erm...1. I always try and put in all the energy I have if someone/something needs it2. I make loads of terrible puns its gr93. I really dont have any other qualities idk🐾 what are you scared of most? How will you overcome it?👏 I'm terrified of abandonment 👏 aaaand as of yet I have no idea how to deal with it ngl🎁 what never fails to make you happy?Really good stand up commedy or my favourite music💙 what annoys you about some people?Their complete lack of self-awareness. Idk, maybe I'm low key jealous too but srsly some people????😤 do you get angry easily?Yeah. I keep pretty good tabs on it so you probs wouldnt know it, but if something upsets me, chances are I'm hella pissed too.🐇 what do you always daydream about?Dramatic and upsetting situations or drunk situations 😂🌻 if you could change 3 things about the world what would you change?1. Sort out equality and all that jazz2. Divide up the land more equally, bc it pisses me off that some people are living in tiny cramped shacks and others have 100 mile square farms.3. End capitalism and with that make all necessary services free.🍓 send me 4 names: kiss, befriend, kill or marry?Anon?✈ what is your dream city and why?I mean Ive always wanted to go to copenhagen but theres no guarantee its gonna be my fave. My fave so far is Amsterdam bc its so peaceful and the architecture is to die for.☕ talk about your ideal day?Spend it with my best friend/crush. Lay in bed late and be lazy and watch good TV/movies. Maybe go out in the afternoon to not go stir crazy and entertain ourselves. Stay up kinda late talking about deep shit, lying underneath the stars.🌸 are you an introvert, ambivert or extrovert?Ambivert!💧 when was the last time you cried?Yesterday lmao 😂 i havent gone more than 2 days without crying in the past week 😧 I just got myself into a nice Depression Episode.🎵 name 5 songs you like atm?Argh I havent listened to music in so long (7 days...) umm so things i wanna listen to- youth by daughter- voices by Motionless in white- living dead girl by rob zombie- corpse roads by keaton hensen- lost boy by troye sivan⚡ if you had any superpower what would it be and why?Mind reading bc my anxiety would be halved.💛 if you could talk to your younger self, what would you say?I'd tell myself to stop trying to fit in and be like everybody else because the people I know are just a tiny portion of the population and really aren't much to aspire to. I'd tell myself to drop all my shitty friends because it would stop me from dealing with a lot of crap later on. I'd point myself in the right direction of the better people 😂I'd teach myself how to stand up for myself and how to not take any crap.And I'd give myself a hug and tell myself it's okay not to be cishet, because maybe if I could turn back time and start to deal with it earlier I'd be okay with it now.💚 who are you jealous of and why?A lot of people really, with qualities I don't have.I suppose one kid in particular is like, everything i want to be. Kind, hillarious, confident, close to people I love. 💎 what would you rather have more of: intelligence, beauty, kindness, wealth or bravery? Why?Bravery or kindness?? Its hard to have one without the other. Also beauty ngl bc im fugly.🙊 what are you ashamed of?My gender and sexuality 👏🌺 which languages do you know? Which do you want to learn?I know english and spanish and I'm learning Danish. Hopefully once I'm okay at danish I can learn arabic. Ill be satisfied after that 😂☘ if you could be any fictional characters friend/lover who would it be and why?I mean, theres plenty of fictional lesbians where im like 😏👀 but honestly if I had to pick only one person I'd choose Kieren Walker from in the flesh bc he needs a friend and I relate to him so strongly.☁ talk about your dream universe.Mental and physical illness doesnt exist. People arent dicks. Everything is free. No one feels unloveable.💜 which acts of kindness are you going to do today?Idk I'm p much done for the day 😂 I've been helping out around the house all day tho🐬 if you could transform into any animal what would it be and why?I mean i might be biased but either a dog or a sloth bc they get to sleep all the time 😂🍄 talk about someone/something you really dislike.Someone I was best friends with for 4 years suddenly turned around and stabbed me in the back, made up shit about me, arranged that all my friends not talk to me for a fortnight, sent group emails stuffed with emotional manipulation and blamed me for her suicidal thoughts. I nearly ended it. Now I get to watch my friends still loving her like she isn't the world's most heartless person. It makes my blood boil.😣 talk about something that has been making you depressed/angry/anxious.I'm staying with my best friend rn and I can't stand the thought of going home.🍪 what did you want to be as a kid and what do you want to be now?I wanted to be a nurse and now I wanna be a doctor 👏 variety 👏🍰 what are some of your favourite sugary foods?I cant really eat sugar 😂 so fuck knows? Chocolate?🍑 what are you obsessed with?Brains, thought processes, psychopaths, graveyards and more 😂💘 what happens to you when youre stressed?I just get really emotional and start agressively making lists everywhere in an attempt to sort my life out.😪 what are you sick of?Humanity.🙀 are you an adrenaline seeker?Yeah its terrible 😂 i hate anxiety but I also kinda love it when my heart races.💥 what are some unpopular opinions you have?I....dont? I cba with discourse lifes too short.☔ would you consider yourself a good person?I think anyone with good intentions is usually a good person so yeah😊 what do you do as hobbies?Sleep, binge watch netflix and blog 😂🎤 whats the last song you hummed or sang by yourself?👏👏👏 Mr Brightside 👏👏👏 what a jam 👏👏👏🐝 whats your worst trait?Being waaayyy too clingy.🌷 whats your mbti personality type and why do you think it suits you?ISFJ and yeah defo, its the defender and I feel that tbh🐶 send me 3 fictional people and ill choose my favourite.Anon?👑 who are your favourite celebrities and why?Kaitlyn Alexander is my bae.Besides that I dont really....obsess over any celebrities? Eliza taylor is doing p good 😂 ummm also some youtubers? Do they count?🐴 opinion on __?Its a great bit of punctuation.🍋 do you consider yourself to be an emotional person?Lmfaoooooo YES📚 share 3 books you love and your favourite quotes from them.M8. Thats not gonna happen 😂 I love any book that makes me cry but I cannot quote a single word.😔 what do you always do when you feel sad? Does it work?Find a quiet corner, shut my eyes and listen to my Depression Playlist. It doesn't always make me feel better but it helps me ride it out.🙂 what thoughts keep you going when you're sad?The thoughts of uni and that I'll hopefully meet some great new people. Also my best friend. Just in general 😂🌎 which country do you live in?England.🐧 describe yourself in 3 words?Awkward, tall and shy.🙉 what quotes changed you?"Pick your fights" bc as much as its a meme it helps me chill outAlso "everything is temporary" and "the sun will rise and we will try again".💭 do you keep a diary?I have a personal blog which acts as a diary yeah💫 who inspires you?Kaitlyn Alexander!! (Listen theyre like the first nb representation I ever knew and I relate so much to everything they say and theyre so cute and talented)👻 do you believe in ghosts and why?I mean, my initial response is no. Because we're just bags of flesh made up of cells and when we die those cells die so theres nothing to live on.But tbh we know so little about the universe I'm open to the possibility of anything at this point.🎀 whats your fashion sense like?Dior. I know what clothes I like and think look good but I never like them on me.🎬 what are some of your favourite films?Deadpool, My sisters keeper, pitch perfect 2 ermm🍦 what is one treasured childhood memory?UmmmmmmmmmmmmWhen I first got my bunny, that was an amazing day!!🐼 if you could meet anyone, who would it be and why?Um my soulmate? Where are they at?

[chekovsphaser]

so @boyjadzia tagged me to do this super long tag game. I’m probably not gonna tag anyone because its way long but I love a good oversharing moment

tagging: no one

last text sent: “and to u”

list three favourite colours: Red, Black, Teal

what time did u wake up at today: 10:45 am

what were u doing last night at midnight: playing the Sims 4

name something you can’t wait for: I hate to be that guy but I can’t wait to be okay again

when was the last time u saw ur mother: Like two weeks ago, or last weekend on skype

one thing u wish u could change abt ur life: My mental illnesses would be gone. 

whats getting on ur nerves rn: My horrid father

favourite tv shows: STAR TREK, X files, Brooklyn 99

first best friend: My older brother definitely. 

listening to rn: random comedy playing on Netflix in the background

3 fears: Being abandoned and secretly hated by my friends, becoming homeless, being locked up like in a hospital or jail.

4 turn ons: Funny, Agrees with me on sociopolitical stuff, doesn’t need to be sexual, Aware and Good With mental illness

4 turn offs: Right-wing, boring, bossy, generally insensitive

sexual orientation: Bisexual 

senior year quote in my year book: “So long and thanks for all the fish”

first thing i notice in a person: whatever is brightest in colour? like hair or a shirt or shoes. 

shoe size: 35 or 5

eye colour: Brown

hair colour: Dark Brown

favourite item of clothing: Currently my LIGHT UP SHOES

what colour of underwear i’m wearing rn: Bright pink

favourite season: I like wet season when theres a nice rain sound when you’re indoors. As for the 4-seasons thing, I guess spring - jacket weather!

how much time i spent on designing my blog: not. I just used a theme someone else made. 

the reason i joined tumblr: I wanted to enter the community of disability stuff I noticed and it just went from there

do i ever get “good morning” or “goodnight” texts: my mum sends me good morning texts when she gets up, usually sometime in the afternoon bc timezones. Plus I also talk to people before falling asleep so a lot of goodnight convos 

when did i last hold hands: like a few days ago I held hands with a friend

how long does it take me to get ready in the morning: I mean, I can and have been out the door in 2 minutes flat but usually it takes at least 30 minutes to get out bed so 1 hr ish. 

have i shaved my legs in the past 3 days: LOL no

where am i rn: in bed

do i like music loud or at a reasonable level: rI like music at normal volume but I don’t hear very well so I guess it’s pretty loud

3 things i love: my friends, shiny things, space

how i feel rn: a little drunk. I mean im not actually drunk but i feel kind of wack

something i rlly, rlly want: mental health

3 things that upset me: mean people, drama/discourse, world suffering

what i find attractive in other ppl: Wasn’t this question already asked? Personality is everything

3 habits i have: biting stuff, drinking too much soda, sleeping weird patterns

something i fantasize abt: Entering Starfleet and going to space 

something im talented at: ~creativity~

the blog i give the most notes to: i have literally 0 idea

last person re-blogged sth from me: boyjadzia

do  i smoke/drink: Nope, neither

my favourite food: depends on my mood? sometimes white chocolate, sometimes sushi, sometimes kebab, sometimes beef? mashed potatoes?

my favourite dessert: Brigadeiros - they’re a brazilian sweet made with chocolate and butter and condensed milk

what i did yesterday: skipped first lecture, went to second lecture, grocery shopping, watched a lot of netflix, played the sims. 

number of kids i want: 0

number of siblings i have: 2

something thats constantly on my mind: That vine where the dude is playing piano in a parking lot and screaming “everybody loves shit fuck”

last person i messaged on tumblr: my buddy ryanepstein

can i drive: nope

what state or part of the world do i live in: London, UK

am i in school: 3rd year undergrad

do i get grossed out easily: yeah. like I have a lot of stuff like textures and things that gross me out so yeah

somewhere i would like to visit for a week: Really good question. I’m not a fan of travel but I’d like to go to someplace in east Asia or Oceania bc those are the 2 continents I’ve not been to

i’ll love u if: you are kind to me. That’s it. I’m a real sad person. 

last show i binge-watched: Brooklyn 99. I rewatched it for the 10th time last week. 

what words upset me the most: like slur-type words pretty much?

what words make me feel best abt myself: I have no idea? Any nice words basically. 

a wish that i’ve wished for repeatedly on 11:11: I usually do a “I hope this turns out okay” of whatever thing I am struggling with that day

who i would switch lives with for a day: IDK. Maybe some cis dude who isn’t mentally ill just so I could see what it was like

my favourite ice cream: i dont like ice cream it’s cold and hurts my teeth. 

allergies: Mint, dairy, capsicum peppers, something that’s used in preservatives and I can’t figure out which one and it makes me throw up.

sexiest person to come to mind immediately: yeah no i can’t? I’m too tired to think?

my childhood career choice: I literally used to say “no one knows what they will be when they grow up so why bother” when I was a child. I was a sassy child. 

one of my insecurities: that I will die alone because I look like a child and that makes any potential dates uncomfortable.

how many blogs am i following: 386

how many tabs/different windows do i have open at this very moment: 2 windows, one tab each. One plays netflix the other is on tumblr

coke or pepsi: coke

tea or coffee: coffee but cold

movie or book: movie probably, I love a good book but unless it’s an audiobook I can’t read for long periods of time in one go because ADHD and stuff. 

a sense i would be willing to lose: smell. I have a very poor sense of smell as is (turns out it’s bc thyroid stuff), and have at several points not had any sense of smell. It really doesn’t hurt to lose at all. 

quote i live by: I do not. 

type of accessory i wear the most: JACKET, or like, spinny rinng?

last awkward situation i found myself in: I straight up asked a girl to her face what her name was because I forgot and she was like “You don’t know my name?” and I was like “I’m sorry??” and it was awkward.  turns out she was drunk but I was awkward

what time is it rn: 23:40

a song that made me cry: many songs. Recessional is probably the last one I cried at?

first song u ever sang at karaoke: At like legit karaoke it was that frigging Coldplay song the one with the ruling the world? I don’t remember the title anymore.