#they make no sense and I am still debating on their stories but I'm having FUN

[eryanlainfa]

Making more random OCs because it's fun. Meet Felix, Euryale, Stheno and Bell. They all work at LuluWorld and it's a mess.

[sillyfudgemonkeys]

BF: *is going on a ‘buying anime spree’* Hey what do you think is the most expensive retail priced anime? Me, without missing a beat: P5 anime, or at least it should be up there. BF: Oh really? *looks it up* Oh that is pretty expensive! Oh well it has cards- Me: Cards? Really? For that price? BF: Yeah you’re right...... *watches the trailer* It looks pretty good Me: It’s not.  BF: How would you know? I thought you didn’t watch it. Me: I watched the first arc, they fucked it up. And fans bitched about the rest of it so I know the rest is bad too from that. It’s trash. The animation is trash too. BF: But it looks fine in the trai- Me: The trailers lie. They cherry picked only the best animated scenes they had for it. BF: I think you and I both know, this might juuuust be your anti-P5 bias. ;D Me: *points to the star ratings on his phone for him to look at* BF: *reads the reviews* BF: I’m sorry I may have misspoke. Me: Like I said, the actual fans bitched about it too. :P

[tyttamarzh]

Tallulah is Phil and Missa's daughter.

This will probably be very long, so if you want to read it, go grab some popcorn and get comfortable.

I have to talk about this because it's eating me up inside. I think I shouldn't give so much importance to comments coming from sewers like Twitter and much less Tiktok, but it makes me so sick (and I'm such a masochist that I even spend time looking for the shit they say to make me angrier and debate them xD).

I am very happy that it was finally made official, with papers certified by the federation, that Tallulah is the daughter of Philza and Missa, I think that was not entirely necessary for them, because they had assumed it for a long time (let's assume that Tallulah needed the pappers to end her W arc), although I suppose that more than anything it was done for those people who still cannot accept it or who deny the paternity of Phil and Missa (With Missa, although it bothers me, I can even understand it, he He hasn't been as present and many people don't know him, but god, it would be a crime to deny Tallulah's paternity to Phil, the man who has kept her alive and given everything for her throughout her life).

I'm glad that, although I have seen negative comments, the majority have been positive (even if it hurts them, it doesn't matter, it's official, screw them). Mainly, the negative comments have been from defenders of W and their arguments are so poor and weak that they are easily refuted. It is obvious that these people do not know Tallulah and have never met her, many do not even know how things turned out and say nonsense like that the current Llulah is an imposter, that it is not fair that they "rewrote" history and erased W (which It is false, Llulah's words make it clear that history was never changed, she simply moved on and that person remained in the past).

I refuted all those arguments on Twitter but screw Twitter, I hate the fucking character limit. So I'm going to expand (I have a lot of poison to get out of my skin). I have some points:

1- "That's not Tallulah" Of course it is her, those who witnessed her life and her growth during the year that passed, can realize that this was her natural evolution. She is the same girl who grew up overcoming her limitations, who suffered, who felt alone, who had abandonment problems, who everyone saw as a poor abandoned girl and who found comfort next to someone who has always loved her like a father and a brother who gave everything for her.

2- "They erased all her lore" No. Tallulah's lore is the one she built with Philza and Chayanne over the course of the year they lived together. Her relationship with W and her longing for him was only part of her story (although people made a lot of emphasis on that), but it was not the only thing that defined her, it never was and only people who never got to met her think that. They see her like an extension of that other person, as the only thing that kept him on the server, but did not see her as an individual character and definitely did not watch Phil's Vods and they never really knew her lore.

3-"How do they explain this in the lore?" Simple, there was someone in her life, someone who was her first father, but who spent very little time with her, who left a long time ago and who is currently no longer part of her life. She learned to let go of the past and focused in the family she has in the present, the family that loves her, that watched her grow up, that makes her happy and gives her security to believe in herself and that is the Death Family, Chayanne, Philza and Missa. Time passes, not all people stay, treasure those who are by your side and let go of what never brought you anything but pain.

4- "They should have created another egg and replaced her" Why replaceher? It has no sense or reason. She is a character who built her own story with her family, a story that never really involved that other person other than with one or another sporadic mention, why eliminate a character that evolved by itself? Little by little she separated herself from what she was at the beginning and that bond that she had with that first father was practically non-existent. What would be the point of eliminating it or replace her with another new character?

5- "No matter what other parents and appearance give her, she will always belong to W because she still carries the name he gave her" No. She never belonged to him. She lived with that man for 2 days and apart from leaving him the promise of a reunion, she did not contribute anything else to her life. She formed her own path, her passion for music was not because of him, it was something she already had before, her love for nature, for animals, everything was built in the days she lived with Philza (even with uncle Bad). She suffered for her first father but she moved on, she matured, she discovered her link with death and her powers as a medium, she acquired her own personality and little by little she built the Tallulah she is now.

She never belonged to anyone but herself and she always fought to prove that, but people insisted on dumping trauma on her and reminding her that she was an abandoned child waiting for someone who at a certain point was nothing more than an idealized dream, because There was never a real relationship between them, they never lived together long enough. She little by little made her decisions and chose the people she wanted to be her parents (and it's not that she had few options, Quackity, Bad and even F wanted to adopt her at the time and asked them to, but she was not a girl who was looking for parents). She could choose and she chose Philza, the person who had always been there for her and later she chose Missa, someone who despite not knowing her very well gave her his love unconditionally and gave her security when she needed it. Then she was able to feel the warmth of being part of a complete family.

6- "They should change her name because W gave her that name! That impostor is not Tallulah!" Why? Her name is not anyone's intellectual property, at the time it was given to her, it belonged to her for better or worse and yes, in some way it will always be a tie to her past, but a past she has already left behind and managed to overcome by creating new memories and dreams.

To a certain extent I understand those who became attached to her because she reminded them of that other person, but if they couldn't see her as her own character, it means that they never cared enough to make the effort to get to know her.

It would shock us all if a character we liked suddenly changed drastically and left behind what like us in the first place. But if they had really watched her, they would have realized that the change was not sudden, it was gradual.

She found in Phil a protective and understanding father who always put her and her brother before anything else, who suffered with her her pain and outbursts of frustration due to the depression caused by the absence of her first father. She found in Missa a cute and loving father who always showers her with love and helps her to have confidence in herself. She doesn't lack anything with them. She has closed a cycle of pain in her life and now she can heal.

She chose the look that makes her feel finally free to be herself, whatever the external reasons that led to that, she finally has a future ahead of her unbound by the past and prefers to be more like the people she considers her family now. If you can't see what all of this really meant to Tallulah and her evolution, it's because you never cared to see even 20% of her story. Well, since the middle of last year she began her journey to break away from a name and be herself, fighting to be seen for who she was.

If those people decide to continue supporting someone despite his shit, that is their right, but the server and the admin were also within their right to decide to kick him out and want to distance themselves from a person they consider unpleasant.

7-There were comments of another type, mainly from people who are really very lost with the lore, people who consider her the daughter of Quackity, even confusing her with Tilín (saying that Q didn't know if she was the daughter of W or Luzu and that she should get a DNA test), when we all know that from the beginning she was W's daughter as a single father and that the only reason Quackity could have become Tallulah's father was if to marry W, but that never happened, W didn't come back and Quackity was never able to develop that relationship with Llulah, she considered him a possible father because she knew W loved him, but Q always being kidnapped or something, they never really related much. There are people who, even with a certificate, continue to insist that Tallulah should have been given to Quackity to raise with Luzu (she had a tender interaction with Luzu and people were already asking him to adopt her, saying that she was alone and had no parents, I seriously hate them!) I shouldn't take seriously people who obviously haven't seen Philza even once and I know that many of those people are hispanic and are limited by the language barrier but if they don't have the slightest idea They shouldn't give their opinion… Tallulah is not an object to be passed from hand to hand, she chose and in order to do so she had to go through a very long and painful arc.

8- I firmly believe that it is a great win to now have a certificate that endorses who the people she considers her parents are, but I insist, it was not necessary, because that has been known for a long time and I am sure that if it was created it was to close the mouth mouth to all those people who are not capable of accepting that.

Tallulah is the daughter of Philza and Missa (and no one else), she is part of the Death Family, that is her story, it is not a whim, a whim is continuing to link her to something she is no longer a part of or wanting to make her a part of a lore that never happened or wanting to give her other parents different from the ones she grew up with (Quackity already had Tilín, Richas and now Pepito, I don't think she needs more children and Tallulah doesn't need any more shitty drama in her life).

Tallulah is a beautiful being, both with her old look and with the new and as Missa says "She deserves only the beautiful things in the world"

Tallulah is Phil and Missa's daughter!!! Tallulah is Phil and Missa's daughter!!! Tallulah is Phil and Missa's daughter!!! And I can shout it a thousand times because it's true and she always was, but now it's certified by the government and no amount of complaining or tantrums can change that fact.

Sorry for my bad english. See you!! jajaja ando re agresiva, pero es que nadie se mete con mi familia xD

[gallusrostromegalus]

ok so re: sternritter i gotta ask, whats the plan for my girl gigi? she's a horrible awful gremlin baby but i cannot help but love her immortal tgirl swag.

also, are there any sternritter who got incredibly underused in the story that you've significantly rewritten so far?

As it stands, Gigi gets to live, but she is going to have to sit through a VERY unpleasant lecture about how yes, Gender is Fake, Political Organizations are Fake, and to an extent the 'Line' between living and dead is fake but Bodily Autonomy and Informed Consent are VERY, VERY REAL and you will *fucking* respect them because the Gotei-13 is the home of monsters.

For better or for worse, the person she's getting the lecture from is Tama Nikuya

---

Tama: Sure, you're a Monster too, Miss Gewelle -that's why I like you so much and am even extending you this offer- but I promise there are much worse things serving in the Guard than were dreamt of in your philosophy. Horrors, artificial and natural alike, well within the comprehension of your intellect regardless of gender, but no less awful. Worse, perhaps, because you understand what's going to happen if you put one drop of blood out of line-

Gigi, twitching: Urrgh!

Tama: Don't gurgle at me in that tone! Tama: You do understand, don't you?

(warning for body horror, parasitism, mind/body control, discussions of violence, transphobia and abuse under the cut) (Bleach is a pretty dark series and the Fic is E-rated accordingly)

Gigi, shaking her head as much as she can: Nglk!

Tama: What part don't you understand?

Gigi: Thzzg-? ThhZomg-!?

Tama, head cocked sideways, squinting as she tries to make sense of what Gigi is saying: 'the zog-'? The Zombie? Oh for fucks sake Gigi, we're well past that.

Gigi: Bugh-? Haaauuuu?

Tama: Alright alright, if it will help. The Zombie relies on some of your blood reaching my brain, or replacing a large portion of my own blood with yours, through which you exert your reiki, and thus control my body, right?

Gigi, Blinking Slowly: ... Gigi: Haugh- Haugh gid you vigure thad oud??

Tama, taking a deep, disappointed sigh: Babygirl, it's not that hard. That's very basic Spiritual Dominion magic. Don't get me wrong, you're very good at it and the sheer number of targets you can control is really impressive but as far as techniques go, it's not terribly complex or hard to counter.

Tama, Gestuting at where Gigi is awkwardly kneeling on the floor, paralyzed: Take the thing you've got- that's an enhanced strain of Ophiocordyceps unilateralis- you've heard of Cordyceps, I'm sure- that I've worked with to function inside humans- REAL pain in the ass by the way, Humans are insanely immune to infection and parasitism compared to most organisms-

Akon, holding an extremely large laser gun, not currently cocked but still at the ready: This is your requested reminder to stay on topic, Sir.

Tama: What? Oh, thanks- but Cordyceps is fun because instead of bothering to control the half-assed mess that is a mammal's neural system, it straight-up structurally takes over the large muscle groups! Just suppress the autoimmune response enough by giving the fungus an antihistamine release function too, and that sucker can crawl into every major support structure you have in under a week!

Akon: Yeah, I'm not sure 'Fun' is the right word here.

Tama: Don't knock it until you've tried it!

Akon, debating becoming the server technician for the 9th again: I'll take your word for it, Sir.

Tama, poking Gigi's arm just below where a long spire of the fungus is sprouting out of her shoulder, one of several growing out of her body and impacting her ability to move, including speaking: I'd say you're about 40% Fungus by weight right now, mostly your skeletal muscles, and those do what I say, which is why you're sitting down and listening while I try to change your mind. Tama, giving Gigi an encouraging thumbs up: -And why you still have a mind for me to change! Tama, giving Gigi a comforting pat on the shoulder next to the fungal spire: I have a lot of faith in your ability to make the right choices when presented with all the information, Miss Gewelle. If I thought I had to change your mind for you, I'd have pulled out the Hypomyces lactifluorum!

Gigi, watching Akon visibly shudder behind Tama: ...uhh. Gigi: Bugh. The Zomgee..?

Tama: Oh, right, The Zombie. Yes, yes- Reiki Domination is pretty tough to resist, especially from someone in your spiritual weight class, but, ah- Well, you've run into two big problems here Gigi.

Tama, sitting down on the floor next to Gigi: First problem is the use of blood as an infection mechanism. Tama, cheerfully, as though giving constructive criticism in an introductory art class: Honestly? Not a bad choice! Blood-bourne infections are some of the hardest to resist, and Forigen Reiki is a PAIN to purge from the bloodstream unless you flush the entire system. Most people, as you have seen, are doomed!

Tama, wincing: ...But I'm not most people. Tama, pondering: ... Come to think of it "People" might be a more correct term for what I am, but my situation is pretty radically different from "most" people!

Gigi, still defiant: Whad- Whaddafug ARE yu?

Tama, gesturing to indicate the situation is about as clear as mud, or morphology-based taxonomy: I- Well. It's long and not really all that funny story, but I got stuck on the wrong side of a a version of the Kodoku Bug Thunderdome curse- you know, the inside- for over eight hundred years with a whole mess of Hollows, Obake, and other nasty things and I went to some pretty extreme measures to survive. Tama, with a sad sigh: To make a long story short- I don't have blood anymore. Or a brain. Tama, frowning in contemplation: ...Or I'm ALL brain, it sort of depends on your definition of 'brain'-

Akon: Topic, Sir.

Tama: Thanks Akon! -But from my perspective, your blood is just another snack with a little bit of Reiki spice on top! Which brings me to your other problem.

Tama: You hit hard Gigi! Real hard! And you really should be proud of the degree of concentration you have! But like I said, the Gotei-13 is the home of monsters, and there wasn't exactly a burger joint or an opportunity to farm inside the Kodoku. ...I survived because I kind of literally ate things like you for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

[There is a long moment of silence as Gigi processes that statement, it's earlier compainion statement about what Gigi's blood was like for Tama, and the general implication of those on Gigi's circumstances]

Gigi: ...Gid I daste gud?

Tama, ears flicking up to listen better: What's that?

Gigi: Uck! Gigi, wide eyed with terror but somehow this situation has not ended in catastrophe yet, and she might be riding the adrenaline as far as it will go: ...Gid I datse good?

Tama: HAH!

Akon, turning around because he can't face this at 7AM without coffee: NO!!

Tama, teasing: Yes, you do taste very good, or at least the aperitif of blood you threw in the thing I use as a face did!

Gigi, giggling a bit in fear like a Hyena: Oh! Dhad'z Good! Gigi, stopping as the rest of the sentence catches up with her: Waid. Gigi: Whad Do you MEANg, 'ting you uze az a fage'? Gigi, with increasing horror: Whag- Whag ARE You?

Tama, giving Gigi a light, encouraging punch in the shoulder: You're a smart girl Gigi! You can figure it out if you put your mind to it! Tama, counting off the datapoints on her paw-pads: I don't have blood, or a brain, I lived underground with nothing but corpses to eat for a few centuries and my go-to restraint method is a parasitic...

Gigi, a horrible new world of possibilities opening to her like the lid coming off a tub of very expired sour cream: ...Mu-Mushgroom?

Tama, giving her two thumbs up: You got it! Tama: "Mushroom" is probably more specific than you intended, but you're not wrong! The part of me standing here lecturing you is more or less the organ I use for sex and sometimes paperwork!

Akon: Speaking of, the division W-2's still need to go out-

Tama: Akon, we're in the middle of an apocalypse. If the council tries to make everyone pay taxes on time this year, the Old Man won't have the chance to burn the government chambers down before the peasants do it for him. Chillax.

Tama, returning her attention to Gigi: It's probably why I'm so cheerful and down to party too! You know. Because I'm a *Fungi*!

Gigi, staring blankly: ...

Tama, wilting a bit: -A. Fun? Guy? A Fungi?

Gigi, starting to cry big, ugly genuine tears: Uh-uh-uuuuuhhhnnn...

Tama, trying to console Gigi with a hug that definitely makes things worse: ...You're right it'd probably be funnier if you didn't have a parasitic fungus rapidly taking over your person and forcing you to sit still and listen to a genuine freak of science tell you about Cannibalism. Tama, giving Gigi a little shake of encouragement: But you see how this makes my point, right? This isn't very fun for you, is it?

Gigi, suddenly locking up like a badly taxidermied fox: ...

Tama, staring blankly: ..? Tama, ears slowly rising as understanding dawns on her face: Oh?

Gigi, face rapidly alternating vivid shades of pink and white as her emotions battle for dominance, before settling on 'Scaroused': -Uh...

Tama, delighted: OH!

Akon, enraged: OH. MY GOD.

Tama, pointing at him and hissing: You are the LAST person who gets to kinkshame anyone young man! Tama, pointing back at Gigi: At least SHE knows how to have fun!

Akon: I'm gonna transfer to the Ninth and never, ever leave the server room again.

Tama: If you think you can withstand the emotional toil of leaving the mass spectrometer in my hands, be my guest.

Akon: :(

Gigi: Uh?

Tama: He's spiritually bonded to a particularly finicky piece of lab equipment that hates me, like how some tween girls become spiritually bonded to giant murderous equines, which also tend to hate me. Don't worry about it. Tama: Back on topic, this does explain a few things. You DO understand that your feelings about this situation are unusual and given that most humans and their spiritually powerful derivatives experience pain and fear from having their autonomy restricted and bodies invaded by parasites, How do you think being made into a Zombie feels for other people?

Gigi: ...Bahd?

Tama, nodding enthusiastically and making her ears flop in agreement: That's right! Bad! Tama, settling down a bit more to explain things carefully to Gigi: See, the thing is- even monsters like us need to get along with other people. Tama: I know a lot, but nowhere near enough to enjoy the benefits of civilization all on my own- I don't know how to fix a toilet, or fill out grant applications or stand in the same room as the mass spectrometer without breaking it, so it's really, really good I've got people Akon over there, who like me, who can, and more importantly are willing to do those things for me!

Gigi, annoyed: Gyou woulgnd AVV to-

Tama: hang on, hang on-

[Tama pokes a few points on Gigi's face and throat, using Reiki to disconnect some of the Cordyceps parasite, then pulls the spire that was developing under Gigi's tongue out. It's much larger than it looked, and makes Gigi's throat wiggle as she removes it.]

Tama: Oh hell, that shouldn't have been there. How were you even talking around that thing girl?

[Tama tosses the fungal spire aside and offers Gigi a water bottle. Gigi takes a few sips before nodding and Tama puts it away.

Tama: Okay, try again-

Gigi: Ugh- You wouldn't HAVE to get along with tall, drak and grumpy back there if he was a zombie!

Tama, disappointed: ... Tama, taking another deep sigh: ...Okay, let's say I zombify Akon-

[Akon cocks and aims the Laer Gun, which whines ominously as it charges]

Tama: WHICH I AM NOT GOING TO DO FOR REASONS I'M ABOUT TO ELABORATE ON, PUT THAT DOWN-

[Akon turns off and lowers the lazer gun, still glaring.]

Tama: Thank you. Tama: I know you're still getting used to how most people have conversations, but that was a normal way to discuss a theoretical scenario and not me about to turn you into a Zombie. Do you understand?

Akon: ...Ues, Sir.

Tama: He used to work for an Evil Clown, don't worry about it- Alright, Let's say I was a micromanaging-type moron, and I decided to zombify Akon instead of just getting along with him. I'd lose all his expertise immediately. No more functioning mass spectrometer or bathrooms.

Gigi, haughty: Mine do.

Tama: Pardon?

Gigi: My zombies keep. most of their skills and personality. At least the ones I make out of corpses. Gigi: Akon could still fix the mass-thingie and if you zombify the Grant Committee you don't even have to ASK for funding.

Tama, intrigued: ...Do they? That's good to know, I'll want to hear more about that later-but that still supports my point.

Tama: Alright, HYPOTHETICALLY I Zombify Akon, and the Grant Committee- well now, the person who's choosing when the mass spectrometer gets fixed and who gets grant money I don't need is ME, and I already have WAY too much work to do, I don't have initiative to spare for them! I got stuff I want to do! I can't micromanage everyone, everywhere all the time! Tama: It's literally easier, more efficient and frankly, way, WAY less stressful to just get along with people and live in a society than to try to DIY one out of corpses.

Gigi: ...I guess.

Tama: So that's my question Gigi. Tama: Are you capable of respecting people's bodily autonomy and personal space to get along with them?

Gigi, frowning and biting her lip: ...

Akon: That doesn't sound like a 'Yes'.

Gigi: It's not though. It's not less stressful to just get along with people. Gigi: That's- That's WHY I learned how to make zombies in the first place. I'd. I'd TRY to get along, dammit! But any time I let people make choices, they chose to get up my ass about my name, or cut off all my hair, or send me off to 'camp', or beat the shit out of me, or- or lock me in the mausoleum and leave me to starve instead of just call me my name or admit they had a daughter- Gigi: ... Gigi: So it was- Gigi: -It was easier with bodies. Gigi: Bodies don't insist you're a boy or call you a freak or take you to a 'private institution' to 'help you get better' where they strap electric paddles to your head and run a million volts through you- Gigi: Dead people are SO MUCH EASIER to get along with! They don't think you're a creep! They don't think at all! Gigi: I mean, why should I-? Why should I try to get along with people who have already made up their minds that they're never, ever gonna get along with me??

Akon: ... Akon: ...I mean, you are kind of a creep-

Tama: -AKON!

Akon: Hang on I'm not done! You are a bit of a creep, but it's not the girl thing, it's the zombie thing!

Gigi: Oh, just because you're scared of a dead body-!

Akon: GIRLIE I'VE BEEN DISSECTING CORPSES SINCE BEFORE I COULD TALK I AIN'T FUCKIN' SCARED AND I AIN'T DISAGREEING WITH YOU- YEAH. IT IS EASIER TO TALK TO A CORPSE THAN A PERSON. I SPENT PRETTY MUCH ALL MY ADOLESCENCE IN THE 12TH DIVISION'S MORGUE BECAUSE TALKIN' TO LIVE PEOPLE SCARED THE FUCK OUTTA ME!!

Gigi: WIMP! YOU HAVE NO IDEA-

Akon: NO, I THINK I FUCKIN' DO! Akon: YOU KNOW WHERE URAHARA HIRED ME OUT OF? Akon: PRISON. Akon: I GOT THROWN IN PRISON WHEN I STILL HAD ALL MY BABY TEETH, *JUST* BECAUSE I WAS SO CURIOUS ABOUT BODIES. JUST BECAUSE I MADE PEOPLE UNCOMFORTABLE! PRISON-PRISON! THE MAGGOT'S NEST, WHERE THEY KEEP WAR CRIMINALS AND WORSE! Akon: YEAH, TALKIN' TO LIVE PEOPLE SCARED THE SHIT OUTTA ME, BECAUSE THE LAST TIME I TALKED TO SOMEONE, I LITERALLY GOT SENT TO HELL!

Gigi: -!

Akon: Captain Nikuya is RIGHT, the Gotei-13 is the home of Monsters- and the twelfth has got some of the most freakish and frightening ones of the whole guard! Akon: But I'll take the self-vivisecting, species-transgressing, only-barely-human Monsters any day of the week over the maggot's nest because we're all shamelessly, gloriously monstrous together, and the ONE damn rule of the monster's ball is to ASK before you fuck around with someone's stuff, especially their body. Akon: Not "Don't mess with someone's body", Not "Don't be weird", Not "try to be normal". It's "Be freaks and monsters, but also friends."

Akon: God help me if Nemuri ever finds out, but that's why Mayuri is still in that flask. Most of us have a pretty good idea how to isolate his consciousness again, but they way he- I'd have killed him the week after he took over if I had any idea how.

Akon: That's the rule Gigi. No violating anyone's right to live as they are. Akon: That's the difference between a monster- someone people are scared of just for being how they are- and the kind of FILTH that needs to be scrubbed off the earth. Akon: Do you understand Gigi? Nobody gives a shit if you're a girl on purpose or whatever- Fuck, I can think of a few colleagues who'd put themselves on a list for you to reanimate them when they die no matter how much of them actually comes back. It's overwritin' people's minds and controlling bodies BY FORCE. Akon, putting down the gun and patting his coat for his cigarettes: If I understood you right, that's more or less what people tried to do to you, isn't it? Tell you how to act, who you were, by whatever means necessary?

Gigi: ...fuck you.

Akon: Fuck me yourself, you coward.

Gigi: ... Gigi: So what am I supposed to do when someone gets up in my face again? Smile and play nice? Roll over so they can kick my guts out?

Tama: Oh, no- If they violate the "Don't mess with other people's autonomy" rule, all bets are off! That's why when you tried to murder me and Akon a few minutes ago, I was right to infect you with a parasitic fungus to protect myself and stop you! Tama: In fact, the sooner and harder you react to that shit, the less people will try to cross that line, so if anyone tries to fuck with you, you absolutely can and should make an example of them!

Akon, holding up his cigarette to ask if it's alright, and wating for Tama's nod: -If anyone tried that shit with me I'd absolutely turn them into a living educational exhibit on why people need to have skin, but genuinely? Nobody in soul society gives a shit what's in your pants unless they're your doc or fuckin' you.

Gigi, rolling her eyes: Sure, sure-

Tama, laughing: No! Really! It was a surprise for me too.

Gigi: You're lying to me.

Tama, shrugging: Okay, don't believe me, believe your eyes- Tama, ticking people off on her paw-pads: You saw the peacock earlier, he's a seated officer and Baldy is his Husband. Tama: Their boss is the most rampantly bisexual slut I've ever had the pleasure of meeting and the primary load-bearing member of the captainacy polycule-

Akon, starting to giggle: -Yeah I bet he can bear a lot of loads-

Tama, casually plucking off another fungal spire to half-heartedly throw at him: Oh, and the guy who had this job before me IS pregnant with his second child!

Gigi, incredulous: ...The guy with the stupid hat that looks like off-brand Shaggy from Scooby-Doo? That looks more a beer belly.

[Akon: Loud, Snorting Laughter]

Tama: Okay, you're right, it looks more like a beer gut than a baby right now, but PLEASE don't tell him that- He's in the weepy mood swings phase right now, and won't get his sense of humor back until the third trimester. Tama: We' re all placing bets on when Baby Kegger is gonna be born if you want in on the action.

Gigi, Biting her lip and grimacing: I- I don't-

Tama, taking Gigi's hand: -You know firsthand how weird my body is. I'm not properly male or female- I've got at least 21,837 sexes within me because of the insane way I have to metabolically regulate my body. Tama, shrugging: I'm just female in conversation because language hasn't evolved the 12th-dimensional pronouns I'd need yet. But when I brought this up at a meeting, the only question I got from the old man was if my uniform would need altering. Tama: I mean. It did, but that's because I'm 4'6" and i get all my clothes in the children's section, but I'm still amused that that was the captain-general's polite way of asking if I'd need any accomodations.

Gigi: ...Promise it'll be okay?

Tama: I don't know how the war is going to turn out, but if you help us and stop making zombies, I promise I'll do everything I can to make it okay.

[Gigi manages a weak smile]

Akon, wheezing, and doing a terrible Scooby-Doo impresson: Ruh-roh! Rhe Rexperiments Breached Containment, And Raggy's rust Whadder broke!

[Gigi, snorting and giggling in spite of everything}

Tama: See? Now you're laughing. When was the last time a Zombie made you laugh?

Gigi, sniffling a bit as she giggles: ...never.

Tama: So, are you ready to give an alliance a shot?

Gigi: I- I guess?

Tama: You guess? I can't go to the captain-general with a mere hypothesis.

Gigi: ...Yes. Yes, I'm ready.

Tama, grinning: So you're going to be a good girl and keep your bodily fluids to yourself unless asked?

Gigi, turning bright pink: Y-yes!

Tama: Yes, what?

Gigi, going even redder: Yes, sir!

Tama, patting her head and releasing the hold on the Cordyceps, at least for now: ...Very good girl.

Akon, rolling his eyes: Uuuugh....

Tama, helping Gigi up: Hey! You know damn well that positive re-enforcement-

Akon, hefting his Lazer-Gun back onto his shoulder: -is an important part of interpersonal communication, reward the behavior you want to see yeah, yeah-

[Akon is about to turn to leave when a thought occurs to him and he stops and glares at Gigi]

Akon: ...You DO hit like a fuckin' truck.

Gigi, blushing and twirling her hair: Well, I mean-

Akon, pointing accusingly at Tama: I KNEW IT! YOU'RE NOT RECRUITING HER FOR THE WAR, YOU'RE RECRUITING HER FOR THE SHINIGAMI WOMEN'S ASSOCIATION INTRAMURAL CRICKET TEAM!!

Gigi: -the what?

Tama: And what if I am? It doesn't matter to you- The Shinigami Men's Association couldn't keep their wickets up if their lives depended on it!

Akon: -Call me when Matsumoto-taicho can bat out of the pitch!

Tama: Yeah, the fact that Rangiku and Hiyori both suck at it and you STILL lost by 203 points to us is not actually helping your case here.

Gigi: Is. Is cricket a sport?

Akon: SPORT? Cricket is an entire EVENT! It's a Way of Life! It's the philosphical ideal of-

Tama: Yes. Tama: It's a very silly sport, and his team sucks at it.

Gigi: Ooh! If we all live through this, I can be a cheerleader!

Tama, causing problems on purpose: Yeah!

Akon, sputtering with fury: I- That's- CRICKET DOESN'T HAVE CHEERLEADERS!!

Gigi, pouting with her index fingers pressed together, rocking her hips: -But I wanted to cheer for YOU Mr. Akon!

Akon, freezing like a deer in front of an oncoming 18-wheeler: -! Akon, turning ever-so-slightly-pinkish about the ears: ...I'll think about it.

Gigi, grabbing onto Akon's arm: Yay! Gigi, hanging off Akon and babbling: What are the team colors? Do you think like Majorette uniforms are cuter or something more like a miniskirt and halter-top?

Tama, letting them get a bit ahead of her as she dials the main camp: Anyone on the horn? It's Nikuya.

Nanao, on the other end of the communicator: Status report?

Tama: Good news! I've eliminated an enemy, found us an ally AND a new batter for the team if we all live to see spring training.

[heliads]

Hello, glad I can submit this request then, I barely find any Luke Castellan fics he needs more love 😭

Anyways, I just wanted to request something small like headcannons on what it would be like at the aftermath of the Battle of Manhattan if Luke didn't die, what would he be like and how the reader would help him overcome his trauma or problems ? Just pure fluff is what I'm trying to say ;_;

Sorry if that doesn't make any sense... Please let me know if you don't understand me XD

But thank you so much if you write this <3

i see that you have asked for headcanons but i am so delighted by this request that you get a full fic instead (ily)

masterlist

Luke Castellan is not sure what to do with the fact that he did not die. It would have made for a better ending, he thinks. It was the logical conclusion. He tried to make a better world, and when that failed, he could have been terminated along with that last dream. It is what most people would have decided was best.

Yet Luke opens his eyes– his eyes, not someone else’s, not that awful feeling of having his body belong to some being that was not even human, let alone not him– and he is alive. Luke is not sure yet whether this is good or bad. He’s not sure that anything in this world could remotely fit into those categories anymore.

He stares up at a blank ceiling above, which confuses him. Last time he checked, Luke was dying on the ruined floor of the gods’ throne room. There had still been a roof over his head, but Luke swore that he could see a sky of the deepest blue. Luke had felt himself fall into that wondrous lapis void, and then he had felt nothing at all.

That was supposed to be dying. It was more peaceful than most people would say he deserved, given all the hell Luke wreaked on the world by allying with Kronos. Luke’s supposed ending had certainly not been pretty:  a dagger in his hand, stabbed into the one place the immortal waters of the River Styx hadn’t protected him. Achilles’ curse had lifted, and Luke was free of the Titan that had been consuming his body whole.

Yet Luke is staring up at a room that is neither burned nor broken. At first, he wonders if this is what death is like, but he’s heard enough stories of the Underworld to know that it would never be this simplistic. No, this isn’t Death; Luke sits up slowly and manages to fight nausea long enough to realize that he’s back in Camp Half-Blood. Back home, his mind tells him, and Luke has to remind himself that’s not true anymore. He has no home. He has no people, he left them all a very long time ago.

A voice to his side makes Luke whip around.

“I’d sit down if I were you.”

Luke trains his eyes until they slowly, begrudgingly focus on an orange-shirted figure seated next to him. At last, he realizes he recognizes the guy. Will Solace, one of Apollo’s kids. He must have been in charge of bringing Luke back from the dead. 

Luke is baffled by the fact that Will is perched here and not Michael Yew, current head of the Apollo cabin, until it occurs to him that Michael is likely dead. That explains the hollows under Will’s eyes, at least, and the undercurrent of hate that Will only barely keeps at bay. Such strong emotions for a boy who’s usually so cheerful. Luke supposes he only has himself to blame for that.

Will may despise Luke all he wishes, but he’s still a doctor at heart. The blond gestures for Luke to lean back down. “If you rip out your stitches and make my work worthless, I’ll kill you myself.” Will says.

Luke arches a brow. “How do I know you won’t do that anyway?”

“I’m still debating,” Will replies pleasantly.

Someone laughs next to him. “Try to stay civil, Solace. Our time for killing is over.”

A camper takes a seat on Luke’s other side. After a few moments of recollection, his addled head realizes that he knows them. That’s Y/N L/N, they’ve been in the Hermes cabin for the longest time, not one of Luke’s half siblings on the godly side but yet another demigod gone unclaimed for years. They used to complain about that to him. He doubts they would repeat the same sentiments now.

Will groans. “Let me at least try to be intimidating, L/N. I only get to do it so often.”

Y/N cracks a grin, then turns to Luke. “I imagine you must have a lot of questions.”

Luke narrows his eyes at them. “Why aren’t I dead?”

Y/N does a superb job of ignoring Will’s clear sentiment that he’d like an answer to that as well, keeping their gaze firmly trained on Luke. “You tried to stop Kronos in the end. Chiron decided that, seeing as you did all that in an effort to protect unclaimed kids and demigods who were ignored by their godly parents, you deserved a second chance.”

“Does anyone other than Chiron actually believe that?” Luke asks pointedly.

Y/N shrugs. “Depends on what you do when you get out of here.”

Will jumps up. “That’s my cue to check on the rest of my suffering patients. You know, the ones that didn’t try to betray us.”

Y/N watches him go. “Ignore him. He’s–”

Luke cuts her off. “Mad that I tried to kill everyone here? I can’t blame him.”

“So you regret what you did?” Y/N questions slowly.

“I don’t regret trying to do something,” Luke says, “only that the gods weren’t as hurt as the demigods. I didn’t want to hurt us, just them. Olympus could use a good scare.”

Thunder rumbles overhead, loud and overbearing. Luke imagines it’s a warning to him:  he’s treading on thin ice by staying alive, he’d better not press his luck by insulting the gods anymore.

Y/N sighs, evidently thinking the same thing. “You wouldn’t be the only one to want the world to change.”

Luke glances over at them. Obviously, he hasn’t seen Y/N since he switched sides, but he had forgotten that they used to be friends. Good friends, too. It’s nice to have at least that back to normal.

“You haven’t been claimed in the last while, have you?” He asks, changing the subject away from more dangerous waters.

Y/N smiles. “Actually, I have. Percy made the gods swear to start claiming more of their kids. I found out about my parentage a few days ago.”

Luke nods solemnly, but doesn’t ask for further details. He made a point of prioritizing the demigod over their godly parent when he was recruiting for Kronos during the war, and he supposes that habit has stuck. It makes him wonder how many more traits of the enemy he won’t ever be able to shake.

“So when do I get out of here?”

Y/N folds their arms across their chest. “Depends on what you mean by getting out of here. You’ll get a clean bill of health within the next day or two, most likely. You won’t be leaving the camp for months, though, if ever.”

The implications of that don’t have to be spoken aloud. Luke messed up, obviously, and so he’ll be on house arrest until the end of time. If he can prove that he’s worth the effort of saving, maybe they’ll let him live his life, but until then he’ll be monitored around the clock.

It’s more than he expected, at any rate. Part of Luke thought that he’d be handed over to some sort of trial once he healed up, made to face his crimes and be overly punished accordingly. That way, the gods could point to him in the decades and centuries to come as proof of why half-bloods should never reach for more than they deserve.

But no, he’ll be living. That’s certainly something. Luke leans back slowly against his cot and ponders this. “Do I get a personal guard or something?”

Y/N lifts a shoulder. “Kind of. You get me. I’m supposed to follow you around and make sure you don’t try to escape.”

Luke snorts. “How’d you get stuck with that job?”

“I asked for it,” Y/N says coolly.

Luke is taken aback. “Why’d you do that?” He can’t imagine anyone in this camp actively trying to bond with him, let alone someone he knew as well as Y/N. Wouldn’t they hate him for betraying them?

They might be just as surprised about it as he is. “I’m not entirely sure. Guess I thought I was the only one who wouldn’t actively try to kill you in your sleep.”

They’re brutal about it, but it’s kind of nice. Honesty is the only sort of medicine that Luke feels like he can stomach right now. Mollycoddling and sugarcoating just serve to waste time.

He half expects Y/N to back out of it, but no, when Luke is declared medically sound and all but forced out of the hospital wing by swordpoint, they’re waiting for him by the door. Luke staggers out into the bright sunlight and looks around like he’s in a dream. The camp has changed since he last saw it. Cabins have sprung up like wildflowers and more are being constructed by the moment.

Y/N notices him staring and gestures towards the new buildings. “See, that’s your doing, even if no one wants to admit it. A ton of new kids have been claimed. Hermes cabin has never been so empty.”

Bitterness surges through Luke’s throat before he can stop it. “I thought that was Percy’s idea.”

Y/N shakes their head. “Percy only got the idea from you. You can make yourself a villain if you want, but you weren’t entirely heartless. You got my godly parent to claim me, and that’s worth a lot.”

Luke smiles to himself as they go. Y/N leads him to the door of their cabin. It’s still cavernously empty compared to the close quarters Luke remembers in Hermes, and he only notices one bunk with belongings on it.

“You’re the only one here?” He asks.

Y/N nods. “So far, at least. I’ve got you now, though. Just as a warning, I will be claiming cabin counselor privileges and there’s nothing you can do to stop me.”

Luke grins before he realizes it. The expression makes his scar ache, but he finds he doesn’t mind it quite so much as before. “I won’t fight you on that.”

He pulls himself onto the top bunk of one of the many empty rows and surveys his new domain. “Do you think it was worth it? Figuring out who your godly parent was just for them to leave you like this?”

After all, what a life. An empty cabin already collecting dust. It’s cold in here without bodies inside to warm it up. The walls are barren of personal touches. Y/N knows their heritage, yes, and is able to move out of a cabin that was never theirs, but this doesn’t seem like much of a blessing.

Y/N lingers by the foot of Luke’s bunk, and he gestures for them to climb up and join him. They do so in a heartbeat, and then they’re sitting opposite each other, gazes locked and breathing steady.

“It can be lonely,” they admit, “but it’s not so bad. You have hope that it won’t always be this way. Maybe someone will come. Maybe someone already has.”

Luke swallows harshly. “I missed you.”

He blurts it out, hardly aware of what he’s saying. He missed a hell of a lot. Y/N. Laughing at midnight, their whispered words covered up by the sounds of dozens of campers sleeping shoulder to shoulder. Training during the day, the clash of celestial bronze. Orange shirts burning like beacons against their backs. Being able to wear his beaded necklace without feeling like a traitor, even if that’s what he is and always will be.

Y/N leans forward. “I missed you too. I kept hearing about you, which is more than you got of me, but it didn’t feel right. I don’t know where the boy I knew is, if he even exists anymore, but I’d like to try and find him again.”

“I’d like to find him again too,” Luke whispers.

It is the dream of a broken boy bleeding out in the palace of the gods. At this moment, Luke isn’t entirely sure that he didn’t die there in the Olympian throne room. If someone told him that this is what dying is like, conjuring up a vision of what he wishes he could have most of all, Luke would have believed them.

In the end, Luke has no idea if this is real or not. All he can do is keep going, keep waking up each morning to see if he is still in the hazy aftermath of a second chance or finally locked down below in the Underworld. Luke always wanted to try for the Isles of the Blest anyway. Maybe this is just his second life, his second attempt at getting there.

He reaches out on impulse and takes Y/N’s hand. He can feel the blood pumping through their veins, the same certainty as being able to press his fingers against a locked door and know exactly how to break in. This is Luke’s next great trick, but he thinks he’d like to do it right.

“Alright, then,” Luke says at last, “Let’s try again.”

pjo taglist: @w1shes43

[itsawhumpsideblog]

The Safehouse, pt. 17

CW: for institutionalized slavery, mentions of abuse, treatment of people as things, medical procedures (x-rays, IV placement), hospital setting, brainwashing

Advice from the Box Boy Liberation Movement:

The type of conditioning rescuees undergo is impossible to shake off lightly. Do not worry, and above all do not take it personally, when they are unable to believe your reassurances. While you should attempt to defer to rescuees' choices, if they are able to make them known, there will be times that it is in their best interest to continue a course of action against their preference. [2] Use your best judgement in deciding whether to proceed in such an event.

[2] One common form of this is the decision to pursue necessary medical treatment for a frightened or reluctant rescuee.

Mikey's breath hitched as Angie eased the car over a speed bump and she couldn't help sneaking a look at him to make sure he was alright. She was trying to be careful, but it was hard on some of these older roads. Angie reminded herself that the ordeal was almost over and next time Mikey got in a car, his injuries would be repaired and braced and he wouldn't be so vulnerable to the condition of the roads. She reminded herself how it had been with Nathan, how badly he had suffered during the ride to the hospital but how much easier the drive home had been, once his leg was set and wrapped and the painkillers had kicked in.

It was hard to tell if Mikey noticed when the ride was rough, although he had obviously reacted; he was staring, wide-eyed, out the window as the neighborhood passed them by. Angie smiled at him and reached over to pat his knee. He looked at her with that owlish gaze, as if he was seeing everything for the first time. Maybe, in a sense, he was.

"We'll be there in about ten minutes," she said, just to fill the silence. "We'll park and then I'll text our contact and she'll come get us. Should be easy." Mikey nodded and went back to staring out the window. Angie debated turning on some music, but she looked over again, taking in the rigid set of his back, his clenched teeth, the nervous movement of his eyes, and decided against it.

When they finally arrived, Angie parked and texted the number she had been given. Here, spot 27 in front of door 2. She hit send and reached over to help Mikey remove his seatbelt.

"Okay," she said, "there you go. Watch your arm- you always do, but still- and the other one- and there you go!" She was trying to sound cheerful, in hopes that he would relax, but it didn't seem to be helping much.

"It really is going to be okay," she went on, in what she hoped was a reassuring voice. "And I promise I'll be there the whole time. I won't let anything bad happen to you. Okay?" He looked in her direction, almost meeting her eyes, and nodded. It was hard to tell whether he believed her or believed that this was the reaction she wanted. Angie tried not to sigh.

They hadn't been waiting more than a few minutes when Angie's phone buzzed with a text and then a woman in scrubs pushing a wheelchair appeared behind the car.

"Here we go," Angie said, still with that determinedly cheerful tone. She hopped out and waved to the woman. "Ready for us?"

"I sure am. I'm Wanda, I work with Dr. Silva- and we have a number of other colleagues in common, obviously." She winked at Angie, who couldn't help but smile.

"This is Mikey," Angie added, bending down to help Mikey out. It wasn't easy, but by holding him around the waist and supporting his right elbow, they managed.

"Nice to meet you, Mikey," Wanda said. She patted the back of the wheelchair. "Have a seat and we'll get you right in there. The story we're telling is that you were in a car accident- I don't think that'll be too hard to believe and it'll give us an excuse to get you right through the doors and into somewhere with a little more privacy. Okay?"

Mikey nodded. He shuffled around and lowered himself into the chair, placing his right hand carefully in his lap. Angie wondered if she should bring the pillow and then decided to leave it.

"Here we go," Wanda said, and pushed Mikey across the parking lot.

The closer they got to the door, the more obvious it was that Mikey was struggling. Angie could see it first in the way he hunched his right shoulder, as if he was trying to curl up and make himself smaller. He began to tremble and when she saw his face, his lips were pressed tightly together and his eyes were closed. Angie reached over and ruffled his hair, just to remind him that she hadn't left, but he didn't respond.

"Poor kid," Wanda said sympathetically. "Been with you long?" With another glance down at her patient, she added, "For his sake, I hope not." Then she seemed to hear herself. "Not because of you, of course- just that if he's been with you and waiting for an appointment- Oh, sugar, you know what I meant!"

"I know exactly what you meant," Angie replied, laughing. "And he's been with us for a couple of weeks already. It was tough to get him scheduled."

"It can be. I'm glad they found time, though."

"Me too. And he will be, too- or at least he will once it's over, anyway."

Angie had been in emergency rooms a handful of times in her life, but never had she gone back to a private room so quickly. There wasn't a wait at all; Wanda paused only long enough to tell the nurse at the desk that she would take the patient's vitals herself and they kept walking. At a big pair of double doors, Wanda pushed a button and steered Mikey quickly around a corner, down another long hall, and through a second set of doors. Angie hoped she wouldn't have to find her way back alone.

At last they came to a room with the door shut and Wanda nodded to it. "Will you get that for us?" Angie did, and pulled it shut once they were inside.

"Here's home, sweet home for today," Wanda told Mikey. He finally opened his eyes and looked around at the white walls, the curtain, the bright light above, and Angie watched his face go pale- or perhaps, more pale.

"It's okay," she said. "I'm going to be right here, remember?" Mikey looked up at her with big eyes and nodded as if he didn't quite believe her.

"Let's get you into a gown and we'll head out for x-rays," Wanda went on. "The sooner we get this done, the sooner you go home and start to feel better, hmm? Angie, will you help him get undressed while I find him a hospital gown?"

She bustled out and Angie helped Mikey out of his clothes, just as she did at home when it was time to sleep, and then folded his things and set them neatly aside where he could see them and be reminded that they were not being taken away.

"Here," Angie said, "Let's close the curtain so you can have some privacy." She started to pull it shut and then realized that Mikey's eyes had gone very wide and he was shaking his head vehemently.

"No?" Angie asked. "You want the curtain open?" He nodded hesitantly. "Okay, we'll leave it. It's up to you." He nodded again, shaky but clearly grateful.

Mikey sat on the edge of the bed in his undershorts, shivering from nerves and cold. He had understood when Mistress explained to him about the surgery, and he knew he ought to believe her but... something in his brain, more deeply rooted than her promises, could not shake the certain knowledge that he was back at a WRU facility.

It looked too much like one, for one thing, although the crowd of people in the first room had been comforting, for a moment. But maybe this was the wing where they housed the bad pets, the ones who needed so much work done that they couldn't be kept. The walls were the same shade of blank white, easy to clean because stains showed up so well. The light was bright and made to be shined in his eyes while they did whatever it was they intended to do. And the curtain would keep anyone passing by from seeing what happened to him. That was why he hadn't wanted Mistress to close it.

But when the nurse came back and she and Mistress helped him into a thin gown that barely covered all of him, Mikey tried to take heart. The presence of the two women was comforting and up until now, Mistress hadn't hurt him even once. Mostly, she helped him. She made sure he got enough to eat and talked to him and let him follow her around the house when he felt restless. He hoped she really would stay, like she had promised.

Once the gown was on, it was back into the wheelchair for x-rays, a concept with which Mikey was not familiar. Maybe he had been, once. He wondered vaguely, as he sometimes did when he let his mind go off wherever it wanted, if he had ever been in a real, for-people hospital before. Mistress tucked a blanket around his bare legs and off they went, all three of them. He wished he could have brought his clothes. He hoped they would still be in the room if he got to go back there.

The x-ray room was terrifying. There was a big table in the middle with some kind of machine over it and a booth in the corner. Mikey did not want to get on the table, did not want the machine to do whatever it was going to do, did not want to know what was in the booth.

"I promise it'll be quick," Mistress said. "Just climb up on the table and we'll help you lay down and we can get it over with. We're just taking pictures, it won't hurt."

He did not believe her, but an order was an order and Mikey climbed, shaking, out of his safe wheelchair with the warm blanket and got up on the table. Mistress helped him lie down and then the difficult part began.

It turned out that they wanted pictures of his arms and shoulders and to get them, they had to pose him just so. They began with his right arm, laying his hand flat on the bed and then turning it over for another angle. It hurt, but no worse than his hands usually hurt.

But then, the nurse took his left arm and moved it, something nobody had done to him since he was last in a facility for unwanted Pets. Mikey knew better than to twist away from her, but his stomach turned over at the movement and he could feel the blood drain from his face. Mistress had promised this wouldn't hurt, he thought.

"I know, honey," said the nurse, although he was sure she did not. "We'll hurry. Poor kid." She went back into the booth in the corner.

"I'm right here," Mistress added. She was holding his right elbow, very gently. "Almost done."

There was a pause during which none of them moved, and Mikey felt, as much as saw, darkness closing in around the edges of his vision. He was afraid he was going to throw up.

And then it was all over and they were sitting him up and he could curl up around his left arm and rock himself, the way he did when he needed to calm down. When they tried to set him on his feet, it turned out that his legs would not hold him. Mikey felt himself begin to panic at the idea of falling again, but Mistress grabbed the wheelchair and shoved it behind him, and when he fell, it was a controlled fall onto the seat with the nurse's arm around his back to help him down. They had to pick his feet up for him and put them on the foot rests, but at last they were leaving that horrible place.

"That was the worst part," the nurse was saying when Mikey's hearing came back properly. "I'm so sorry, honey. Nothing worse than an IV left, though."

Mikey was pleased to find that they went back to the room where his clothes were, where Mistress was kind enough not to shut the curtain. They put him back on the bed and this time the nurse went to his right arm.

"We're going to get an IV started," she told him, but she was looking at Mistress, too, as she spoke. Maybe she needed permission for each step. "Get you some fluids and painkillers, too."

He didn't know what that meant until she came over with a bag of something and a needle. Mikey stared at it and felt like he couldn't breathe. Every time he thought he knew what was going on here, they came and did- something like that to him. He knew where that needle went and he knew what happened when they put it in a Pet's arm.

But he couldn't get away. The nurse inserted the needle and clicked open a little piece of plastic and Mikey began to cry. He shook his head, wishing desperately that he could talk, plead, beg them not to take his mind away again. He would promise to be good, do whatever they wanted, even with his arms bad. If only they would just...

As he had known it would, the world went soft around the edges. Somehow, impossibly, he could feel the pain in his arms melting away. The world was quieter now and slower. He closed his eyes and sniffled and waited for his life at the Safehouse to disappear. It would have been nice to say goodbye to Nathan and Francis, even if he would forget them soon.

Mikey couldn't feel time passing, but when he opened his eyes, there was less liquid in the bag hanging next to him, so he knew it had. The soft feeling was still there and the pain in his arms was... not gone, but so much less that he sighed with pleasure. Mistress was stroking his hair and he wondered if it was all over and he would be allowed to go home, to see Nathan and Francis and sleep in his own bed.

Then his eyes flew open. He remembered them. Whatever was in the bag, even though it made him feel sleepy and light, he still had his memories. He looked down at himself and found that his hands and arms looked no different. He went to lift his left arm, which hurt but somehow not as much as it usually did, and Mistress gently pressed his arm back down to the bed.

"Not quite yet," she said and smiled at him. "They'll come get you soon, though."

Mikey slept again and woke when the door opened and a tall woman with dark skin and dark hair in a bun and wearing a long, white coat came in. She was holding a clipboard and she shook Mistress's hand and she smiled at Mikey. He heard her say, "His shoulder is badly dislocated. The dislocation wasn't reduced properly, if at all, so we'll take care of that while he's under. His left arm is broken in several places and his right hand is completely smashed- that's the technical term." She and Mistress laughed, but they didn't sound like it was really funny.

"Hi Mikey," she said to him, and he tried to look attentive. "I'm Dr. Silva. I'm going to perform your surgery. Okay?"

He tried to nod, but nothing happened. "Sorry," Mistress said, grinning. "He's a little loopy."

"Perfectly okay. We'll just get you asleep, Mikey, and then head to the OR. It'd usually be the other way around, but I think this will be less upsetting for you." She looked over at Mistress, who nodded.

Then they did something with the needle in his arm and the doctor said, "Can you count to ten?" He couldn't, but it made no difference, because he was asleep before he knew what was happening.

At home, Francis and Nathan were in their usual positions on the sofa while Tim bustled about the kitchen getting lunch ready.

"You doing okay?" Nathan asked. Francis clearly was not. His face was still sweaty and he kept sighing and shifting uncomfortably.

"Francis is in working order," was all he said, however.

"I don't think he is." Nathan's voice was teasing, but sympathetic. "You feel pretty bad?"

"Francis is anxious. Perhaps it is the fever."

"Perhaps it's worrying about Mikey."

Finally Francis pushed himself up on shaky arms and turned to look at Nathan. "Francis is worried that Mikey will not be himself when he comes back," he said quietly.

"Like- what do you mean?"

"Francis is worried they will erase him again."

Nathan nodded understanding. "I know, man. But they went to the same place they took me and I promise you, it's just a normal hospital. For people. They don't erase anyone there, not even pets. I'm sure of it."

"Are you really sure?"

"Really sure."

"Then Francis will try to believe it."

Next time: Mikey wakes up after surgery.

Master List

Tag list: @pigeonwhumps, @cepheusgalaxy, @i-eat-worlds, @honeycollectswhump @taterswhump, @starfields08000 @whumpsday, @fruitypinapple00, @currentlyinth

[thatgreenoneyt]

Magolor's Epilogue is NOT Magolor's Redemption Arc (Part 1)

Magolor is probably one of the most complicated characters to talk about. He’s also the most dynamic character in the series, second to King Dedede. I’ve already made a video essay regarding Magolor’s characters actions already, but not about the Epilogue. I wanted to hold off for a while because I was thinking “Well someone else would have this take! Surely someone would have it!”

And after a year… no. No one has talked about the epilogue the way I will. 

A lot of people seem to have come to a conclusion that the Epilogue is about Magolor’s redemption arc, and while there’s enough evidence to come to that conclusion, two things can be true. 

Before we head into deep territory regarding Magolor and Magolor’s epilogue, I want to talk about Star Allies for a moment. I don’t want to talk about the Jambastians, The Story or the Jambahearts– not at first. I want to talk specifically about Void Termina. Whether or not it’s part of dark matter is still unknown, however due to the heated debate and what I’m about to talk about, it would make more sense if Void Termina is a strand of dark matter– in some way shape or form. His name in the Japanese variation is named “End Nil” meaning Zero. and… well there’s only two major concepts that own the name “Zero” in the series, and both are a form of a major villain of dark matter. 

There’s something that has been confirmed in a miiverse post regarding Dark Matter’s abilities. It can form memories real enough to hurt you in the forms of rainbows. Pretty much everything regarding Void Termina is associated with rainbows. The forms of both bird and gorilla. That’s why the body disappeared the moment the strand of what looks like Dark Matter launched out of the body’s neck. 

Another thing to mention– while it’s not canon, the light novels portray something worth taking note of; specifically how Kirby reacts to seeing the “face” of Dark Matter. He goes into a mental breakdown, questioning why the face looked just like him, however, he is in a form of rainbows– [Enhancing Void Termina’s Kirby Face] this isn’t its true face, this is a perverted memory of Kirby, designed to mess with him. 

Why am I talking about this? Well… there is something that I mentioned in my last essay (video). Void formed the memory of the Master Crown– plenty of times. Clearly this is a memory– a memory that it manifested, meaning that it knows about it. Not only does it manifest the Master Crown, but also its messed up form. Why would it know about this?

I made a wild accusation that the Master Crown is linked with Dark Matter, and the parallels on how they both act are pretty much one of the same. Possession, negative emotions, draining those of personality– it’s pretty much a slam dunk.

If it truly is a form of dark matter or is at least associated with it, Magolor’s actions make a lot more sense. 

“Lor sense something was amiss when it met Magolor. It can travel to far-off paradises with ease… so why didn’t it? Perhaps it hid its true power, wanting to be stopped after stealing the crown.”

~ Vs Lor Starcutter EX, Kirby’s Return to Dreamland Deluxe

His reasoning for searching and studying Halcandra is unknown. All we know is that he wanted to know its presence due to it being more of a fairy tale and wanted to see if it was true. 

“It was in a dusty tome that Magolor first learned about the legendary item. It all sounded like a fairy tale, until he found the Lord and began scheming. It’s time to save the universe, Lor, and Magolor.”

~ Vs Magolor EX, Kirby’s Return to Dreamland Deluxe

While it could be the fact that Magolor stole the crown, and Lor wasn’t fond of it, I think it had more of a vendetta of the crown itself. The light novels, while not holding any weight in the canon, do however support that he held a grudge against Magolor. 

"’...Don't get in my way. I'm your master, you know... Me, Magolor…’ But the screen showed him nothing more than the information necessary for completing the repairs, just as it always did. If the Lor could speak, it had no words for him.’”

~ The Starcutter and the Lying Wizard, Chapter 9

However, this is the only game where he thought he held authority and had malice in his heart, and while the Light Novels give entertainment, the canon is vague. 

The point is the Lor knew that something was wrong with him. 

In any other game, while yes he was quite an asshole, he wasn’t exactly malicious nor did he think he had some sort of authority. On top of this, since there’s debate that the Kirby Clash Series is likely canon, his mannerisms seem to hold my case well.

It can be argued that his time in another dimension humbled him, but as I said before, two things can be true.

Over and over again, the game encourages that we’re saving Magolor. Especially in the EX variations. 

“What remains of Magolor is a sad shell. He’s possessed by the limitless power of the Master Crown, imprisoned by the hatred and possession of prior rulers. Now… defeat it and save Magolor’s Soul!”

~ Vs Magolor Soul, Kirby’s Return to Dreamland Deluxe

I’d like to think that the EX variation of Story Mode is arguably more canon than the original Story mode due to it giving off more depth. Magolor’s epilogue also encourages that as well in the beginning scene where it’s Magolor’s Soul who gets vanquished before Magolor himself falls and gets banished. 

There’s also the mention of Prior rulers as well— which I don’t have much to say here. 

Now I know that a good chunk of people will say that this can’t be dark matter due to the fact that since Landia has been taking guardianship of it for quite some time and nothing really happened to him, which while yes that may be true, if the theory that The Dark Hearts and Void Termina is also associated with Dark Matter, it means that what its doing isn’t possession, it’s influence.

Just look at what happens to both Dedede and Meta Knight— notably Meta Knight.

“Corrupted by the power of a dark heart, Meta Knight’s dedication to the purity of combat has been eclipsed by a secret wild streak that always lurked within him. This once hidden fury is now unleashed with every stab and thrust of his sword.” 

~ Vs Meta Knight, Kirby Star Allies 

Possession is one thing, influence is another, and I think influence is a gatekeeper of Possession. With Meta Knight under the INFLUENCE of Dark Matter, he didn’t really do much. Meta Knight isn’t easily messed with according to Forgotten Land, so this had to be powerful stuff.

“The lone illusory foe that you encounter outside of Forgo Dreams. When Fecto Forgo tried to control Meta Knight like it had King Dedede, the experienced swordsman came out on top through sheer force of will… but the result was this mysterious doppelgänger, formed by the residual psychic energy.”

~ The Lone Illusion Phantom MetaKnight’s figurine, Kirby and the Forgotten Land.

Now that I believe I settled my case regarding if the Master Crown is in the family tree of Dark Matter, we can finally talk about Magolor’s Epilogue.

Now that we are done talking about Dark Matter, and Void Termina, it’s time to talk about the Epilogue: 

TO BE CONTINUED

[shenlis-spear]

THE LEGEND OF SHEN LI 与凤行, 2024

⇢ starring: zhao liying, lin gengxin

If I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more. (I'm talking about The Legend of Shen Li)

Let me preface this by saying I'm biased. And it's been a million years since I tried to put my thoughts into writing so this is gonna be all over the place and long-winded. And probably wouldn't make any sense. So here it goes.

I really enjoyed The Legend of Shen Li. Do I love it? With all my charred heart. Do I think it's the best drama this year? It's still April. It's hard to say. Are Shen Li and Xing Zhi the best power couple? This shouldn't even be a debate.

Honestly, I didn't even plan to chase this drama while it's ongoing because I binge watching drama is what I enjoy best. However, I was bored. And The Legend of Shen Li's trailer looked interesting. And my heart still needs healing from the mess of an ending that is Princess Agents. I needed closure. So I started watching the drama, and boy oh boy did it drag me down one hell of a roller coaster ride of emotions every single night. (No, I'm not complaining.)

However, before I talk about the things that I really loved about the drama, I have some things to say about the stuff that kind of irked me. Because no drama is perfect (unless it's Nirvana in Fire).

So let me get started on the things that I feel like the drama could've done better.

Musical scoring - the OST's? Chef's kiss. However, they way they're putting music on the scenes are a hit and miss. Most of the time it just distracts me from the scene and I just get bored with the mv-ish scene. I wish cdramas especially custom ones would stop this. I don't need 5 mins of the leads staring at each other in all angles accompanied by a really nice song. I'm here to watch a drama. Although, I kinda did get used to it in the latter episodes (specifically ep35-38) because I definitely needed a minute or two to process the emotions.

The progression of the story - One thing. I'm confused. Not to the point that "I don't understand the plot confusing" but still confusing nonetheless. There was no consistency in the scenes and the dialogues. (Ex fishing village). There was no flow. I feel like someone messed up the storyboard and when they edited the scenes they were also confused. Or maybe this is the issue of the translation of the dialogue? I don't even know. Still, I definitely think this part could've been done better.

The internal monologues - sigh when I said the thing I love most in dramas are their dialogues I don't mean what's happening in The Legend of Shen Li. The characters just talk (or think?) too damn much I can't keep up. They're supposed to be the characters whom their actions should tell the story but the way they're narrating the whole plot to me is just so jarring. Am I watching a drama or listening to an audiobook? Sometimes I can't tell. I wish they'd tone it down but it just got worse with the later episodes.

The camera - this is just me being nitpicky but there are some random camera angles especially the spinning ones that probably is supposed to make the scene dramatic but all it did was make me wanna vomit.

This is not in any way, shape, or form hating on the drama because I genuinely enjoyed it. I've deluded myself into waiting for a Princess Agents S2 but I got a better deal and had Zhao Liying and Lin Gengxin to reunite in a new project which is better in my opinion because Princess Agents is a hot mess. There was really no saving that one.

So moving on to the things I like! But like, where do I even start?

First of all, Zhao Liying and Lin Gengxin. Chemistry so good, they had to be casted in another drama. Everything about them was just so perfect for the drama and the role. Could not ask for a more perfect casting than them. The 7 year wait was almost worth it.

The WOMEN! - so much room for improvement regarding the characters but I loved that the women were not treated as damsels who always needed saving. I have to say 5 1/2 braincells were working throughout the drama, 2 from Shen Li, 1 from You Lan, 1 from Jin Niang Zi and 1 from Shen Mu Yue (1/2 from Xing Zhi because he's too unbothered if it's not related to Shen Li).

Shen Li - might not be the best female character in cdramaland but I think she can hold her own place. She's stubborn, a bit reckless but she's loyal and righteous. She's a strong woman without being a stereotypical cold and ruthless strong woman. Shen Li is a strong woman at the same time also a mad woman in love. She does not have to be one or the other. The more I write this the more I'm falling in love with her character. You just don't find a character like her. She is Shen Li. A capable general. A strong leader. An empathetic comrade. A respectful student. A woman in love. She is not just one of them but all of them.

Lin Gengxin is pretty believable playing as an ancient god. He has that air around him that screams your highness. He played the lofty and aloof Xing Zhi to perfection.

And what can I even say about Zhao Liying? As always miss ma'am played Shen Li perfectly. Whimsical, stubborn, in love and devasted in love, you can feel all those emotions just watching her eyes.

It has angst but not too much that we as viewers would spend multiple episodes pulling out hair of frustration about the misunderstandings and accidental killings. (Not a shade to any specific drama but just to the xanxia genre in general). It has the perfect balance of angst, romance and comedy. You laugh, cry and giggle all in one episode. The comic relief scenes are naturally funny and doesn't feel forced. Zhao Liying and Lin Gengxin's comedic timing are 👌.

The conflict was handled maturely and the confession was direct but still heart fluttering. Throughout the drama, they both got their heads perfectly placed on their shoulders.

The last episode! Let us talk about the last episode because when has a drama provided that kind of fan service just making one whole episode of shenanigans and fluff. After going through the angst, the reward that is the last episode is just too good and definitely worth all the tears.

Also, can we talk about Dong Jie's guest role? I know miss ma'am is good but when I tell you I cried for a minute because of her story arc? Just hands up and mic drop. So so good!

Now that all of these are out of my system, hopefully I can move on to the next obsession, whatever that may be. I'll still probably watch episode 39 on a daily basis though. It's just too enjoyable and it makes my day. Will probably, revisit this "review" in the future and update it because I'm aware that at this point it's not making a lot of sense.

RATING: 9/10 REWATCH VALUE: 10/10 definitely would watch again! ACTING: 10/10 CATEGORY: GUILTY PLEASURE

[aromantic-diaries]

hii, i have a question

(im pretty new to the community)

i heard at some point, there was so much aphobia inside the lgbtq+ (not that much has changed but thats not the point) so aspecs decided "hey so we are separenting ourselves for the lgbtq+ and creating a separate community" and then the alloallo members of lgbtq+ got mad because of the separating so aspecs came to back to the community

is it true? how did it happen? i kinda need some context

I am in no way a veteran of the aromantic community as I've only been openly identifying as aromantic for about a year and a half and running this blog for roughly a year but I have heard horror stories of the rampant aphobia on this website in the mid 2010s (I was not even on tumblr back then as I'm what tumblr considers a toddler at the tender age of 18). From what I can tell, it died down after the tumblr exodus when the majority of what was considered the worst of tumblr users with dogshit opinions migrated to twitter and I'm guessing that most exclusionists are dwelling there now. Good riddance if you ask me

I don't know anything about separating from the community so I can't tell you if that actually happened, though it makes sense. Aspecs being lgbtq+ is more of a mainstream opinion nowadays than it was back then even though some still like to debate that, but I have heard there's aspecs who are otherwise heteroromantic or heterosexual and cisgender choosing not to identify as lgbtq+ due to having faced hostility within the community. I myself sometimes feel out of place, despite also being trans alongside being aro and ace and the fact that back when I identified as bi I wholeheartedly accepted that aspecs are queer and still think that we should be included in the conversation around sexuality

So yeah if anyone who's been here for longer than I have has anything more to add I would love to hear it

[juliamex3]

I knew whether this is Emilie or Amelie would be a huge debate in the fandom but the worst part is I can't even decide which side I'm on-

Like on one hand, with only the context of the episode, I would've been 100% sure this is Amelie. My first reaction to this scene was "WHAT THE HELL" then the immideate thought after was "wait this is just Amelie that makes more sense".

For one, she's wearing black. That has always been Amelies colorscheme. Amelie wears black, Emilie wears white.

Félix is in this scene, so his mom being there as well wouldn't be strange at all.

Plus Nathalie is there, alive and well again. So I thought that was Gabriels wish. Help Nathalie. He accepted his own death and Emilies as well and gets to be with her again.

BUT we don't only have the episode itself to go off on with this. We have a model sheet and the episodes script that refer to her as Emilie.

So, like, this should 100% be Emilie right?? But that seems so weird to me?? Because would the wish work like that? Can Gabriel trade one life for two? Wouldn't that mean there is still something else off in this new universe, someone else missing? Balance and all?

But mixing up the chatacters in the script seems like such an unlikely error.

There was a scene in the story board of Adrien smiling at the woman that got cut in the finished episode.

Which, if this is Emilie, is kinda disappointing to me that it didn't make it in. This isn't the moment he reunites with his mother timeline wise, but it's the first time the viewer sees them together again, so having this little scene in it would've been nice. It's not that long, they could've saved two seconds of time somewhere else.

If this is Amelie however, and the smile would've only been there to support the fakeout, then yeah makes sense to cut it out, it wouldn't really have been that important.

Maybe they changed their mind further down in production? Maybe it was supposed to be Emilie, but they ultimately decided not to bring her back to life and reused that model to be Amelie? I have no clue.

I know this is intentionally ambiguous, the viewer is supposed to wonder. If they wanted to be clear about it being Emilie then they would've had both of them shiw up. Thomas played off it himself on his twitter.

But the uncertainty of whether or not Emilie is alive again is driving me nuts.

Honestly an insane way to make use of the fact you have characters that are twins lmao

[yellowhollyhock]

raph vs a volcano day 20

The 1987 episode plot:

Donatello's health scanner predicts Raphael has only 24 hours to live. Raphael goes around doing good deeds and taking ridiculous risks because he's gonna die anyway. Meanwhile Donatello figures out his machine didn't work right and means to tell Raphael, but you see he is distracted doing good deeds and taking ridiculous risks. It culminates with Raph inside an active volcano (trying to stop it from erupting? bro??) and his brothers have to come rescue him.

I love this episode. For so many reasons.

1) What an interesting way to give Raph his role while keeping him in character within the new role they gave him for this show. Because Mirage Raph is the guy who always wants to help without pausing to think about whether they can. He's known for sometimes being impulsive and always being protective. And not just of his fellow turtles! He sees someone in trouble he wants to help. But usually in Mirage that's expressed with violence. So for the show they made the "crazy one" express the same traits through sarcasm instead and he became the witty one, and I love how future Raphs are both. And I especially love when 1987 Raphael himself is both

2) This is such a classic plot. It's like... the tribbles spoof/tribute or 'character gets kidnapped but acts so annoying they get released.' You know the kinds of plots I mean right? Our style of storytelling has changed (it's always changing) but tv shows in late 80s early 90s especially had these. You could pretty much guess the plot from the title because you know the characters and you know the story. The exciting reveal is mostly the jokes. There are words for what I'm saying but I haven't had an english class in a few years, so take this ramble and trust me. It's a beautiful example of whatever this is. And!

---2a, It doesn't have the classic resolution that 'character thought they had one day to live due to a misunderstanding' would have on a kids show. There isn't a 'moral' about seizing the moment and using your time wisely. There also isn't a moral about communication, so instead of the miscommunication being annoying like it would in a preachy episode, it's gloriously hilarious to watch

3) Speaking of that, the obligatory 'he tried to ask' scene is Raphael watching Michelangelo cry on Donatello's shoulder because "I'll miss him so much" "I'm sorry there's nothing I can do for him" it's the oven. The oven is broken. Michelangelo is sobbing in Donatello's arms like his world is ending because they're going to have to get a new oven because this one's beyond fixing. And Raphael fully believes that Michelangelo is begging Donatello to fix him, when this version of Donatello is so very none medic. Like I don't even know how to describe why and how much I love this scene. I think I killed english

4) The scene of Raphael in the volcano. I just. He's so funny. This episode really captures what I love about the whole show, which is that I am absolutely buying into it and feeling deeply about it, and simultaneously enjoying it ironically. Does that make sense? When you can put your whole heart into unironic enjoyment but your brain at the same time gets it's 'make fun of this' treat. So both types of fun at once.

---4a it's not trying to fix the plot holes it's enjoying that in this format you don't have to. I feel like this is severely under utilized in modern cinema. make things not make sense on purpose for fun. don't explain about where they are, how they carried that object with them, why there were not other consequences for certain actions. The fun thing about stories is they don't have to be realistic unless you want them to

so for today I had intended to write a Rise version of this episode. I think it would work well for them. Plus, Raph and Donnie bonding. However. That is going in drafts and will be coming. later (march for raph is my opportunity to collect drafts for the rise turtles apparently.) I'm actually still debating if Donnie would make a health-o-meter or if something goes down in witch down, but either way, ❤️💜

[allthecanadianpolitics]

Hi!

I hope that you had a great week and that the long weekend is going great!

Sorry I’m sending you an anon ask, I don’t like doing it because I would rather have a debate around this, but as often with unpopular (one might say controversial in some space) opinion, I know I may be branded as someone I don’t feel I am.

My question will be about the laïcité in Quebec. To sum it up, so you can have a good idea of what my position is before asking you my questions, I don’t not support the full laïcité, French-style, like I don’t support it in hospitals, public administration, like if you want to display your religion as a doctor, I think that you should be able to, as long as it doesn’t interfere with your job (i.e. refusing to practice an abortion because of your religion is not ok, in my opinion).

But for the schools, to be transparent, I am a teacher near Montréal, I teach in secondary, and I’d be inclined to agree with the laïcité of the public school. All of it. I feel like the school system should be a safe space for all kids, and by letting religion, and religious practices inside a public school, we are failing at this mission. I don’t care if you are religious, the job of a school and a teacher is to teach you, regardless of your personal beliefs. Like if you’re a Christian and you don’t want to believe in evolution, well that’s your choice, but you’re still gonna learn about it because this is the reality of our world, and your beliefs system shouldn’t interfere with that. And I don’t want, as a teacher to have to put disclaimer in front of all my classes.

So my question is: why are people (especially left leaning people) so against it? Because education is usually one of the center piece of the fight for tolerance and acceptance but I feel like we’re failing at providing a safe space for kids that grow up in extremely religious household and that would like to get out of it but don’t because of family and peer pressure.

I am not stupid, so if the answer is : because it disproportionately target people from specific faiths that may have to wear visible clothing (i.e. Muslim and Jewish), I guess you are right, but I think it is more important to provide a safe space for kids that want to escape religions.

I may have a bias, as I grew up in a very religious household (evangelical Christians) and my dad was a pastor so I never really had a say in it. I got out of it in the university, but I really wish the public school system would have helped me get out of it sooner.

If you read all of it, I hope I didn’t bother you too much with what could basically be my life story at this point. Thank you!

PS: as you can guess my first language is French, and I really am not an English teacher so sorry if my broken English is awful to read.

"Just as a preface, I'm not the usual person who answers the asks, I'm one of the two people helping the usual admin run the blog while they recover from injury. This is important because I'll be addressing some of my experiences growing up Muslim in Quebec, experiences that the admin is not trying to speak to and is leaving for me to address. First off, I do want to note you're speaking from the perspective of the privileged group causing religious oppression as opposed to the receiving end. As someone who was growing up 'Christian' trying to escape religious impositions from your father, you're not in a situation where your religion is being oppressed and suppressed systematically, nor are you suffering under presumption your religion is inherently violent. This is why your comment on your opinion being "unpopular" makes no sense. Your opinion is not unpopular, it is in fact supported by the CAQ and their adherents. Second, the left does not support this because the interests of the right in making such laïcité laws was never to protect children from religious imposition. When I went to private school, where those rules were strictly enforced only onto Jewish and Muslim students but not to Christians wearing cross necklaces (although ostensibly those rules applied to them too), the result wasn't anyone's religious beliefs being protected nor was anyone tolerated, as I was bombarded by homophobic harassment and bullying from our Christian peers and accepted by my Muslim peers. The result was alienation of the Muslim and Jewish students. You should remember that is the original intent of this legislation is not to protect anyone's rights but to remove them. They are telling Muslims "Leave your religion at the door, or you're not a part of society." This is the practical impact of this legislation, and nothing else. You are harming more students than you are 'saving''. Additionally, your worry that Muslims having a prayer room somewhere in the building is a religious imposition on other students, in your imaginary likely atheist ones, is based in islamophobia. The idea that parents can somehow enforce their children to practice at school just because there is a room that allows them to literally makes no sense either. Your concerns are misplaced." "Removing Muslims' ability to have a room to pray in at their school does not remove any mechanism by which parents can use to force their child to perform religious duties they do not want to do. But what it does is continue the operation of an increasingly hostile and alienating system in Quebec that wants Muslims to know they're not welcome in their own country. Would you seek the outlawing of abortion because many men force their partners to undergo them when they don't want to? No? Why? Because it's a basic human right to have access to that service. And just because people impose it on people in their family as part of their abuse doesn't mean it should be removed as an option for everybody, the majority of whom want to use it for legitimate and sincere reasons."

[sarilolla]

Now I'm thinking about Pop Trolls and what happened with them... I love making it clear in my fic that what happened with the Bergens affected them, to various degrees.

Small ramble? I guess? It's not completely cohesive

In Hanahaki, they make peace with the Bergens, but most older Trolls are still anxious around them, and only Bridget and Gristle actually know where the village is and they never go in.

In Different Beat I'm at a bit of limbo, I can see them helping Bridget which would help King Gristle and it dominos into the Bergens being happy, but there won't be a positive relationship between the two species.

In Experiment Pop... well, Bergens are genuinely huge bad guys there, and there's no way the Pop Trolls would ever willingly interact with a Bergen. There's more trauma than just Trollstice, and it affects the newer generations too meaning they can't fully get away from what happened.

I have more aus that I haven't posted but Bergen relations are spotty or bad there too, so... I guess I just think they should have been affected more

So it's all different, which is the joy of aus, but something I don't like is how glossed over the trauma of Trollstice is in the movies and the series. How long were the Pop Trolls captured and eaten? The franchise doesn't give us a definitive answer, but from context clues I would say a decade or two at the bare minimum. The first movie starts with the story where it's shown the city is built around the Troll Tree. They wouldn't get such an established city in so little time, I refuse to believe that. Trollstice was so integral to them, that the adult Bergens in the beginning of the first movie seemed like they had had a Troll their entire lives. I refuse to believe the Bergens showed up between BroZone breaking up and Rosiepuff being eaten

I want to say that realistically, the Pop Trolls were captured for 80-130 years. It may seem like a lot, but it is what makes most sense to me (feel free to debate me on that and provide your own speculated timeline). The timeline just... doesn't work properly? We don't have any set points to look at, except that in the first movie the escape was 20 years ago, and between World Tour and Band Together a month has passed. This makes it so I can fuck around with the timeline as needed, but they could have given me more to work with. So the only timeline I am working with is that at the escape, the Pop Trolls had been stuck with the Bergens for nearly 130 years, the whole Music schism happened almost 200 years ago (and while they were with the Bergens there was a generation or two who didn't even know other Trolls existed), and the Strings were made around 250 years ago? But that also doesn't fully fit with how a society evolves, so might have been even longer between all of this?

Anyway... Back to the Pop Trolls and how the Bergens and Trollstice affected them

I love making jokes in my stories about how desensitized the Pop Trolls are to death and destruction of their home. I love writing other Trolls' reactions to that. It's fun and morbid at the same time. Like the other genres can be as pissy as they want about Pop's attempted takeover so many years ago, but in a cynical way, they got their karma... Other genres had places to be safe, evolve in their own time, no huge threats, but the Pop Trolls lost that, and you can't tell me that wasn't lost for a long time

I firmly believe the Pop Trolls don't have an actual cemetery, but rather a field of flowers planted in remembrance, a Memorial. Flowers planted for the ones lost, but no bodies buried with them. Just a flower representing who they were and what they meant to their loved ones (which brings in my headcanon that flowers and flower language is a big part of Pop Troll culture). It's just in the past 20 years they actually have had bodies to bury, and those are few and far between

...I had a point to this ramble, I think. I think Trollstice and Pop Troll history is my fictional roman empire, it has genuinely gone in and out of my head since the first movie. It just hits hard

[arikad0]

I try not to speak about the LTD but it's been insane on Twitter ever since Rebirth came out so I am just gonna. quickly give my thoughts

(REBIRTH SPOILERS BELOW)

Cloud and Tifa almost kiss in Gongaga

Cloud and Tifa eventually kiss and confess to having feelings for each other

Sephiroth constantly gaslights Cloud into thinking Tifa is dead while emphasizing that Jenova can look like someone he loves

Aerith recreates her first date with Zack with Cloud and it doesn't go nearly as well

Cloud tells Aerith he sees her as a friend in the Japanese version (though tbf if you got Aerith for the GS date he doesn't say this, he just agrees to hang out with her again iirc)

HOWEVER, no matter if you got Aerith for the GS date or not, Aerith says she knows where she and Cloud stand and that, while she likes him, there are two different kinds of liking someone. which. yeah definitely shoves their relationship in a more platonic direction

also people comment that the two do not look or act like a couple during that dream date

ship what you want. ABSOLUTELY ship what you want! who cares if you prefer headcanon over canon? but the fact that people are insisting Cloud and Aerith are canon after Rebirth is??? so weird???????

tbf from what I've seen, pretty much everyone who is neutral on the shipping debate and played Rebirth agrees cloti is the canon one. and tbh while I'm kinda surprised they just straight up had Cloud and Tifa kiss each other this soon, I'm not that surprised it happened at all?? the devs have said countless times that one of their main goals with the FF7R trilogy is to leave the story a lot less up to interpretation, so it makes sense they tried to kill the love triangle this early. unfortunately the English translation team still tried to make it a bit more ambiguous, but if you look at Rebirth's script in literally any other language it's very obvious the love triangle is pretty much confirmed over (and honestly I'd argue it's still pretty obviously over in the English version, especially with that kiss)

and honestly. let's face it. that love triangle died way before Rebirth came out. Cloud and Tifa end up confessing to each other in the og game no matter what choices you made and they live together and have a kid in AC. Rebirth is just moving Cloud and Tifa's relationship along a little quicker, which makes sense considering what is gonna happen in part 3

[mandos-mind-trick]

I'm forever grateful for this fandom

I've been meaning to post something like this for a while. I debated doing it during my next follower milestone (which is very close) but today just felt right.

I've been in a funky place these last few weeks due to a lot of things going on, and this time of year is always a struggle for me. I'm feeling better now, putting aside how today makes me feel, and some things have happened that are going to continue to make things improve slowly but surely.

Today marks twelve years since my mom's death. She died of colon cancer, which the diagnosis for came on rather suddenly and traumatically (that's a story in itself) and she fought for two years before finally succumbing to it on August 14, 2011. I was only 15 when it happened, sitting across the room from her when she took her last breath.

She and I were very close. I was a surprise child, born about 20 years after my siblings so I was raised as an only child. My mom was everything to me since my dad took on the more stereotypical gender role of working all day. (I was close with my dad but not nearly like I was with my mom.) My mom was the glue that held our family together and her getting sick and then ultimately passing really took its toll on my family, and me.

My mom was the one that introduced me to Star Wars. She loved the movies. She went and saw the original trilogy when they came out in theaters, and she instilled that love into my siblings and I. I still remember the day when she finally let me watch The Phantom Menace. I think it sticks out to me because if you had known her, you wouldn't have thought Star Wars would be something she was into. We went and saw the two remaining prequel trilogy movies when they came out in theaters and even the Clone Wars movie (the last one to come out before she got sick) and it was just so special that we shared this thing as a family that we all loved.

I didn't watch Star Wars for ten years after she died.

I rebuked anything and everything that had to do with Star Wars. Every new movie, every new show that came out, all I could think was how much she would have loved it (even the sequel trilogy.) I tried so hard to hate Star Wars because every time I saw anything related to it, it just brought up all those horrible feelings. The pain and grief of losing my mom and in a way I felt like I was betraying her because she'll never get to watch Star Wars again.

I don't really know what changed my mind. I honestly couldn't tell you what switched, what caused me to risk dipping my toe back into the world of Star Wars. Maybe it was all the Baby Yoda memes.

I decided early last year that I was going to watch The Mandalorian. It felt like a safe place to start since there were no emotions attached to it like other things. Also, I've been in love with Pedro since Game of Thrones so that also helped. Watching it, it didn't really feel like Star Wars, but at the same time, it reignited the feelings I used to get watching it with my mom. It took me a long time to watch the first two seasons (the only two that were out a that time) but I'm glad I did it. I went back after I finished those and rewatched the prequels and decided I was going to watch the Clone Wars show. I never really got into it when it was on TV, since I was reaching that stage of pubescence where I was trying to distance myself from anything that felt too childish.

Well, long story short, here I am now. The Mandalorian helped me ease myself back into the world of Star Wars, and the Clone Wars dunked me in head first.

I still think about it, I still think about her when I watch things. It's less painful now and more bittersweet. There's a sense of melancholy underneath everything that just kind of sits there. It never goes away, but sometimes it gets buried enough I don't feel it.

I certainly don't regret coming back to Star Wars. I certainly don't regret getting involved in the fandom side of things. When I decided to watch Star Wars again, I was sort of flailing between fandoms. That awkward spot when you leave one and have to find something else to occupy your every waking (and sleeping) moment. I had just left Marvel due to a toxic friendship (that's a whole other thing in itself) and had briefly jumped into Kpop (I still love Kpop but yikes at the fandom side.) I needed something and Star Wars decided to be that thing.

I didn't plan on getting so involved with the clones. I originally started this blog as a Mando blog (hence the name) and my first Star Wars fics were Mando fics. A lot of them have never seen the light of day and probably won't and that's okay. I hadn't realized, even when I first started getting into the fandom, that there was such a community centered around the clones. I remember when the Clone Wars movie came out, I desperately searched for any fics related to the clones, and there was nothing. So to return fourteen years after searching to find an entire fandom based around the clones...it was a bit unbelievable.

I'm so glad I found this place and eventually became active within it. Y'all have helped me more than I can ever say. I went from debating quitting writing entirely to enjoying it again. I'm writing like I did seven/eight years ago. It no longer feels forced, like I'm forcing myself to write so I don't lose my ability. I like what I'm writing. I'm proud of it. Y'all have helped me get over the impostor syndrome, the hatred I used to have for my writing. I can look at my works and feel confident in them because I know that they're good and I believe that they're good. That confidence and positivity has translated into other areas of my life. I still struggle sometimes, I still question myself, but it's never to the end of "I should quit because this is utter garbage" anymore. (When I say my writing is trash now, it's coming from a joking place, not a serious one.)

A lot of that growth has come from me and the work I've been doing, but you all have had a hand in it. I'm so grateful for all of you, from the silent readers to the dedicated commenters. You've helped me in so many ways. I'm not going anywhere, no matter how bad things get. I may have to take breaks but I'll always come back here because I have a reason to. You're stuck with me for the long haul.

I'm so glad I found my love of Star Wars again. I'm so glad I decided to engage in this fandom space. You're all so special to me and I love each and every one of you and I am so thankful for you. I can only continue to repay you with my writing and my unhinged thots.

[tadpole-apocalypse]

So Astarion says during the post Cazador cemetery scene that he didn’t like Tav at first. Which makes sense given what we learn about him throughout the game, but it really got me thinking about I see Morgan and Astarion’s relationship and what they actually see in one another beyond the physical, so here is some stream of consciousness about their early relationship that I can't stop thinking about.

Firstly, I think the decision to seduce her was entirely instinct; I doubt Astarion actually sat down and planned to manipulate her, because it wouldn’t even be a debate to him. Ofc he’d seduce and manipulate her, that’s how he’s done things for the past two centuries. He doesn’t even think of doing otherwise; it's just how he is around others he perceives as useful to him.

She vouches for him to the others after the vampire reveal, mostly because she’s pragmatic and they need all the help they can get for the tadpole crisis.

When he tries to bite her, she has no moral qualms about digging into his mind. Not only does she see he has fed only from vermin, but she can feel echoes of his hunger, his revulsion, and then the barest bit of satiety as the putrid blood slides down his throat. Then he starts pathetically begging her for her blood, so she takes pity on him. It’s also pragmatic, she would rather not camp with a starving vampire, but it's mostly pity.

It turns out she likes being bit, so when he turned on the seduction she was like…ok fine let’s do this. It was casual for her to start, as well. She thought his over the top seduction was a joke, and didn’t realize he actually trying to seriously seduce her this way until she teases him about it at the tiefling party (during the scene where he’s trying out all his lines on her). He doesn’t have her “hooked” the way he wants; She still hasn't dropped her guard around him entirely and he needs her on his side against Cazador. She would also have spent some of the tiefling party flirting with Halsin and trying to get him to drink with her. Karlach and Lae’zel also shoot their shot with her here.

There's a really interesting dialogue you can get when holding the Sussur flower as a Sorcerer (or any magic user I presume) because it blocks all magic use. Astarion made a comment that we should fix not having our magic asap, because "he wasn't with us for our personality" like in a cutesy "oh darling I'm joking but am I really" way. He just for a moment becomes very transparent about the transactional nature of their relationship and because I had Morgan react with panic I thought she would have been really upset by what he says here. They would have a big argument around this part of the story that does threaten to end whatever they have going and it’s only until he sees she is actually really shaken and left vulnerable by the experience that he tries to fix his mistake.

Clearly what he was doing up until now wasn't getting him the results he desired, so he has to change tactics and actually try to cozy up to her in a way she will respond to.

He stops with the clichéd lines and act, which lets them talk more candidly with one another. At this point she's still being tight lipped about her background, and all she's shared is that she sold fortunes in the city to pay her rent. But they have things in common because they are both selfish cunts who reluctantly start to care about the others around them, and they can have animated conversations about fashion, local baldur's gate politics, and necromancy.

He spontaneously offers favors, like mending her clothing or slipping healing potions/baubles he nicked off of the last merchant they passed into her bag. He does them as an incentive to get her in bed again but it feels nice when she is genuinely impressed by his work. She has an eye for detail that he grows to appreciate, particularly when it comes to himself as she is not at all the type to give him the shallow praise he wants. It becomes a game for him to get those little reactions from her because of his actions.

Then by the time they’ve made it to Last Light Inn he realizes that he’s even starting to look at her entirely differently. Her large nose was quite elegant actually, and her freckles weren’t nearly as hideous as he first thought, and actually in this lighting she was quite stunning, really. And her blood was really really good.

His oh moment happens after the Gauntlet of Shar. She clocks his scars as Infernal way back to their first time together, sketches it out so he can see it for himself, and is generally like “hey I see this is important to you, I can help if you let me.” And she proves it by killing Yurgir, no questions asked. Just goes out and kills a devil just because he needed it. He’s a step closer to achieving his seemingly impossible goals because of her. And she’s covered in devil blood and gore and reeks because no one has showered in weeks, but she’s looking at him with fondness in her eyes and blood in her mouth from the Merregon arrow she took to the face, and his chest hurts in a way it hasn’t in many years if ever.

So what starts as him molding himself into a more attractive honeypot for Morgan ends up being something that makes him go...oh I want this. I want this to be real.

Morgan herself grew up in a cult where her social relationships and interactions with outsiders were heavily controlled, and she was always warned about sweet talking men looking to steal her away. Once she got free of the cult, those guys became her type. She was perfectly content to have short but intense relationships that inevitably self destructed, and this was how she expected things to go if both of them survived their situations, until she caught feelings too.