#they’re living up in the hayloft so maybe some week night I’ll put out some tuna and start trying to get the kittys to stay

[southislandwren]

Would really love if my landlord would reply to my text or email so I can start trying to catch a kitten and have mom bring me arby’s little playpen so once I catch one I can keep it caught and start bonding.

[aliveprofessor]

Don’t Be Afraid Of The Dark

rating: M

word count: 11742

archive warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence

personal warnings: Minor character death, demons, knives. Stay safe and don’t read if you have troubles with these things!

description: Ryan Bergara and Shane Madej - full-time independent ghost hunters. But when they happen upon a small town and unleash like, actual, literal Hell upon it, their lives won't be the only ones changed.

There's more cliches, too. Don't worry about that.

A/N: LISTEN i know this is super super long but let me just thank @lesbiancleophas​, @thepossessionofshanemadej​, and @crappylittledemon​ for betaing this!!! without y'all this would pretty much be illegible, thank u for making my dumb brain words entertaining <3

READ IT ON AO3!

You got me running like a spider in a bathtub.

Andrew had not wanted to start his morning with strangers in his town. He watched from the loading dock in the hayloft, Riceball in his arms. The farm was sprawled out behind him, his house just to the left of the barn. An unpaved road stretched on for a few miles before turning into the main road into town. Andrew liked his little vantage point, away from everything, but seeing people turn onto the road that led to their house, and then turn and go back into town, was unsettling.

  “I don’t like this, Rice,” he frowned. “I don’t like this at all.”

  Eventually, Steven figured out where his recluse of a boyfriend had holed up. He called from the ground outside.

  “They’re just strangers, Drew! They don’t bite!”

  Andrew pouted, but made his way down the stairs. Steven greeted him with the same sunshine smile that Andrew had fallen in love with, and maybe - don’t tell Steven, though - Andrew fell even more in love than before.

  Steven scratched Riceball’s cheeks and cooed to him, and Ragdoll let out a small chirp.

  “I love you.”

  The words escaped Andrew’s lips before he could stop himself; it was the first time he’d ever said them out loud.

  Maybe it was just because he was up so early and he thought them so hard that they exploded out into the brisk air without his permission - but whatever the reason, they were out there.

  “ Oh ,” Steven said, beaming. He kissed Andrew hard, Riceball scratching Steven on her way out of Andrew’s embrace. Andrew smiled into the kiss, bringing Steven closer.

  “For the record - I love you too,” Steven murmured. “I know how hard that was for you, and I appreciate you in my life so, so much -”

  “Just shut up and keep kissing me before I have to talk to the shmucks that showed up today,” Andrew interrupted, and Steven was glad to oblige.

  The sound of engines made their inevitable appearance in the driveway, and Steven stilled, hand on Andrew’s chest.

  Steven patted him, glancing down at his well-fitted shirt. “Another time,” he said, convincing himself as much as he was Andrew.

  A two-door jeep rounded the corner of the winding dirt road that led to the barn, and two men hopped out of the front seats. Another pushed the passenger’s seat forward and unfolded himself from the back.

  Steven greeted them, hand outstretched. “How can I be of service to you gentlemen?”

  The taller one - and that was an understatement - grinned. “I hear you got ghosts?”

  The other man was about Andrew’s height, with black hair and wide eyes. He smacked his companion’s shoulder.

  “Shane. We just met them. Chill.”

  He turned to Steven. “Sorry about my partner. He’s a bit forward. I’m Ryan, this is Shane. We have a YouTube series where we hunt ghosts. We’ve heard a lot of stories about your barn.”

  “Oh, yeah,” Steven sucked in a breath. “... The barn.”

 Andrew turned to introduce them to the building - and God, it could not have been creepier if there had been a storm and a clap of lightning and thunder. The wood was starting to rot, vines crawled up the sides of the building and seemed to move on their own, and the shadows inside seemed too dark, too cold. The paint had faded to brown - dusty and dark, and in different spots the paint peeled to reveal the original wood. The whole thing felt so off from the rest of the farm, which was teeming with life. The barn just reeked of death.

  It had taken Andrew forever to warm up to the barn, and he was still uneasy in certain spots. It wasn’t like it was falling apart, but it creaked all the time, and doors closed and opened on their own - and sometimes, Andrew heard a voice or saw shadows.

  For a while, Steven had been worried about Andrew’s mental health - which, if someone seemed like they might be hallucinating, was fair. But then Steven began to see the same things Andrew did. The worst part was that they weren’t rare occurrences. Almost every other week, there would be a minor incident.

  By the time their first six months had been up, they’d sort of gotten used to it.

  But only sort of.

  “So…” Steven prompted, waiting for Shane or Ryan to finish.  “We want to film some; investigate some,” he said, smiling hopefully. “Maybe… stay the night in the barn?”

  Steven glanced to Andrew, shrugging. Andrew shook his head. He just met these people - he didn’t want them in his barn.

  “Sure!” Steven said, through gritted teeth, shooting Andrew a pointed glare. “Would y’all like something to eat? There’s no activity in the house, but we could show you around and have you over for supper before the sun goes down.”

  “That sounds super !” Shane exclaimed, looking incredibly pleased, “Ryan, do you want to get some shots of the barn?” He looked to Andrew, who nodded his ascent; and the pair took off excitedly.

  Once they were out of sight, Andrew pulled Steven aside, hissing. “Why would you let them stay in our barn ? I work there!”

  “I work there too, sweetheart,” Steven rolled his eyes, “They seem like nice guys. If it makes you feel better, I’ll let you sleep on the couch with your pocket knife.”

  Andrew frowned, but didn’t feel like arguing any longer. “Alright. But they only stay the night. I want them gone before noon tomorrow.”

  Steven nodded, pecking Andrew on the cheek. “I really do love you. I’m sorry I invited two strangers into our house.”

  “That southern hospitality is really starting to get to you,” Andrew chided, thumbs rubbing circles into Steven’s arm. “It’s okay - I’m just a grumpy asshole.”

  “But you’re my grumpy asshole, and I love you,” Steven said, the emotion in his eyes melting Andrew from the inside out. Andrew cupped Steven’s face and brought him in for another kiss.

  Andrew broke apart and as the sun peaked in the sky, he murmured, “You’re the best thing that ever happened to me.”

  But Andrew and Steven had work to do that day - watering the fields and working on their marketing. A surprising amount of their work was done online - creating an appealing website and making it their own, reaching out to farmer’s markets… it was a lot.

  At four, the two men - intruders, in Andrew’s mind - showed back up and knocked on the door. “Thank you so much for inviting us in for dinner,” Ryan said, grin wide on his face.

  As Steven let them into the house, Andrew finished up a nice little dinner for them - brisket, mac ‘n cheese, bitter greens, and lemonade. It was comfort food, mostly for Andrew’s benefit. He took the mac ‘n cheese out of the oven, setting it on a potholder on the table. Already on the table were the bitter greens and the brisket, which Andrew had roasted about an hour beforehand. He got out four cups and the pitcher of lemonade, and looked upon his masterpiece. It really did feel cathartic to cook like that again - he’d definitely put a bit of effort into how everything was arranged and it showed, and it was nice to have something to be proud of.

  Andrew hoped he could have a redo with Ryan and Shane; he’d been particularly standoffish that morning, and he didn’t really know why. He still didn’t feel very at ease , letting two strangers into his barn to spend the night, but usually he could pretend to be hospitable for a bit.

  He’d definitely take Steven up on that offer of sleeping on the couch with his knife.

  He smiled as the three men walked into the kitchen. Ryan and Shane had wanted to keep their shoes on, but Steven had them take them off. He was very particular about the carpet.

  Steven served the food, stranding Andrew out on small talk duty. “So… how did you hear about our farm?”

  “I think the previous owners messaged us… a year ago?” Ryan looked to Shane, who nodded, “I dunno, I didn’t realize the owners had been switched. I thought you’d be the Laupers, but obviously -”

  “We’re huge flaming homos?” Andrew joked, and Ryan wheezed out a laugh. “Yeah, I figured we don’t really fit the nuclear family aesthetic they left behind. Notice how this house feels like it crawled out of the fifties? So did they. Anyway, as far as I know, they’re retired in some RV park in Florida.”

  “Well, I’m glad we can still do the episode,” Shane grinned, “Our viewers can get pretty aggravated if we don’t have the season ready on time”

  “Our lateness is kind of a meme, really,” Ryan laughed, sharing a lingering gaze with Shane. Andrew raised an eyebrow at Steven in a silent question. Andrew took off his apron and oven mitts and took his own seat, digging into the food he’d waited so long to eat.

  Everyone else seemed to take that as the cue to eat. “This is really fucking good,” Ryan said through a mouthful of bitter greens.

  Shane gently smacked his arm. “Don’t talk with your mouth full,” He said, with his mouth full. Ryan swallowed and stuck his tongue out at Shane, leaving Andrew and Steven in hysterics. He could see why their show was popular - they were hilarious to watch, their chemistry was electric and witty and it sucked you right in. They chatted all evening, the sun fading at eight.

  “You’re absolutely positive you’re fine with this?” Ryan said hesitantly as Steven led him and Shane to the barn. Steven assured them, and Andrew watched from the porch. He frowned into the distance, a horrible sinking feeling in his stomach.

  He shrugged it off, going back inside and doing the dishes, trying to work off his lingering anxiety. By the time he was done with the dishes, his hands were trembling and his heart was racing. He hadn’t felt that bad since… well, he didn’t like to talk about it. Steven found him leaning against the soapy counter, getting his shirt wet, trying to breathe and calm down.

  Steven took Andrew’s hands in his own. “It’s gonna be okay, Drew. They’re good people. I made sure all the windows were locked.”

  Andrew nodded, throat tight. Steven kissed him gently, prying him off the counter and making him go lie down so he could finish the dishes. Amidst Andrew’s protests, Steven managed to shoo him off. Andrew was grateful for a dark room, really, he was. But the anxiety still lingered in his chest.

  He held Steven close that night.

  .o0o.

  Ryan Steven Bergara had not been expecting to see a gay couple canoodling on the driveway when he pulled into the Laupers’ residence. He’d been up since four that morning, so everything about Steven and Andrew had startled him. The barn had startled him more.

  Steven relayed the stories of the barn and, unfortunately, Ryan soaked it all up. He wondered how the Laupers lived there for so long - and Shane rebutted in his usual style.

  “Because ghost aren’t real , Ryan,” He rolled his eyes, “And, anyway, old people are crazy.”

  “And you’re an asshole,” Ryan nudged Shane harshly with his shoulder, “C’mon, let’s wander for the rest of the day. I’ve heard some pretty wild stories about this town.”

  And so, they walked around the rest of the day, vlogging camera in hand, just talking about the town’s odd history.

  “So, let me get this straight,” Shane’s brow was furrowed as they sat on a bench after stopping for ice cream, “This town was founded by a serial killer, has allegedly housed Jesse James, has had a ripe history of occultists, and has had an almost record-shattering number of homicides and suicides per capita.”

  “Well, I think if there’s any place that’ll get you to concede that ghosts are real, it’s here,” Ryan said, leaning back on the bench. Around them, people played, seemingly unaware of the town’s past. “And, anyway, that barn gave me the heebie jeebies and it was like, nine in the morning when we saw it.”

  “I will admit that something about that barn made me anxious,” Shane frowned, “But then again, it does appear to have never been touched since nineteen seventy-nine.”

  Ryan rolled his eyes. “Just eat your ice cream, longlegs.”

  Ryan turned off the camera, relaxing a bit and biting some of the chocolate shell off his ice cream. Shane, seemingly immune to anything that afflicts human beings, ate his ice cream without regard for his teeth or brain. Ryan was appalled. “I can’t believe you. Where should we get lunch? I’m fuckin’ hungry.”

  Shane let out an indecisive noise, eyes darting around main street. “The barbeque place smelled good.”

  Ryan nodded, taking a minute to finish his ice cream before walking with Shane to “ Habersburger ”. There was a woman at the register, a lovely looking brunette with a smile that lit up the room. Around the room was a bar, several tables and booths, and a small stage.

  “Howdy!” The woman at the register asked. People laughed uproariously from a nearby table. “My name’s Becky, and the giraffe taking orders today is my fiance, Keith. What can I do for you?”

  “Table for two, please,” Ryan smiled back to the beam of sunshine that inhabited the town. Becky seated them near a window.

  She passed out the menus. “So how long have y’all been together?”

  Shane had this weird little smile on his face as Ryan spluttered. “We’re not together - just friends.”

  “And you’re not out with anyone else on such a beautiful day?”

  What was she trying to prove? Ryan thought as Shane spoke again.

  “We’re filming for our show. We’re going ghost hunting at Ilnyckyj’s.”

  Becky nodded, seemingly convinced. “Ah. Keith will be right with you darlings.”

  Ryan thought the town was doing well for one with such a dismal history. He played footsie for a while with Shane under the table while he scrolled on his phone. Eventually, a tall blond man with another radiant smile showed up at the table.

  “Your gorgeous waiter today is Keith,” He introduced himself, “Try not to fall in love.”

  Ryan and Shane both were in stitches by the time Keith left, and the food was delicious, too.

  “How can such an amazing place exist in such a small town?” Ryan asked, stirring his Sprite, full and happy. A band had gotten up on stage and was playing, sweet bluegrass pouring out the front door.

  Of course, Ryan thought the bluegrass music was sweet until he really stopped to listen . Songs about death, of people… killing their husbands. Pleasant.

  “What the fuck is wrong with this music?” Ryan whispered to Shane as four men sang in beautiful harmony. The bass player, fiddler, banjo player, and lead vocalist all seemed perfectly at peace singing about a “river of death”.

  “I dunno,” Shane said, “I think it’s kinda pretty.”

  “Of course you do. Let’s get out of here and sightsee.”

  “Goin’ so soon?” Keith pouted, arms overflowing with plates. “Well, at least let me recommend you the Museum Of Angels - it’s about our town’s history. Very cool. Right up your alley, I think.”

  And with that, Keith was gone. Ryan shrugged to Shane, who just shrugged back. And they set out on their next endeavor.

  The Museum Of Angels - complete with a ghost tour - sat on the outskirts of town. It looked much smaller on the outside than it was in reality, halls full of history set before Ryan.

  He and Shane spent hours absorbed in the museum, a time capsule of the murders and plagues and cults and natural disasters of the town.

  And sure, Ryan got some good shots in, but nobody could capture the look on Shane’s face when he was truly absorbed in something. Maybe Shane didn’t agree with the ghost part of the museum’s message, but he read every body of text in that museum. Ryan certainly could feel something stirring in his chest - a long-dead crush that seemed to resurrect itself at random. Ryan figured that’s what you get for repressing something that deeply - but little twinges of affection were so much better than hopelessly pining after someone who was almost certainly straight.

  Ryan could barely figure himself out, anyway - how could he begin to figure out Shane?

  With the bitterness now scratching at his throat, Ryan gathered himself and coughed a bit. “Let’s get going soon, Shane, it’s almost four.”

  “We’ve spent three hours here?” Shane asked, still absorbed in some paragraph about a mother who’d drowned her husband and two children, “Wow - that’s - man . Can we come back here sometime?”

  “‘Course,” Ryan said, voice almost breaking in trying not to speak too softly to Shane. He wanted so desperately to hold his hand and say I love you because - oh God - he loved Shane.

  He loved Shane; he loved his asshole attitude and his freaky long legs and his love of history and his humor and his kindness that was just below the surface. Ryan loved Shane and maybe in the middle of a museum about death wasn’t the ideal place to realize it but it happened and Ryan needed a minute but he couldn’t take it and he couldn’t breathe .

  Ryan kept walking. Eventually his heart calmed down and his face returned to normal Tennessee sweatiness instead of furious blushing. Ryan walked with Shane back to their Jeep, all the equipment still in back, and Shane set off to Steven’s again. The wind still whipped Ryan’s hair around and maybe he was enjoying it immensely and maybe he felt a little free when he rode in the Jeep and maybe it was the best fucking feeling in the world and maybe Ryan was starting to realize how close it was to when Shane smiled at him.

  The Jeep pulled up to the barn again and Ryan spent the walk to the door pushing his feelings somewhere the sun didn’t shine.

  .o0o.

  After dinner, Shane and Ryan were to stay the night in the barn. Shane felt his apprehension return. Even after Steven had assured them that the hay loft was perfectly fine - they didn’t even have hay up there - Shane would’ve felt much better sleeping on the ground. As much as he hated to admit it, there was just something that creeped him out about the barn. And usually, he could chalk it up to disgust; there was just something so fitting about the word creep that it stuck in Shane’s brain like glue to paper. It felt like he was being followed. It sucked.

  “This place sucks ,” Ryan hissed as soon as they got into the ancient structure, the empty stalls echoing Ryan’s sentiment back to him. Shane saw the camera out of the corner of his eye, but he didn’t reply. Something about Ryan’s statement rang too true.

  Shane gritted his metaphorical teeth. “I think you’re imagining things.”

  “Oh, just like you always do, gigantor,” Ryan rolled his eyes. “So - can we get past the part where you taunt the demons and get to the part where we try to sleep and I don’t?”

  “Why don’t I let you have a minute alone, first?” Shane grinned, “The most of the activity is reportedly from the quarantine stable, where they kept the sick horses. Why don’t you go stand there for a few minutes with your spirit box or whatever?”

  “Sounds like a plan,” Ryan nodded, grabbing the spirit box and walking into the quarantine stable. Shane saw him take a deep breath and collect himself, and then he shut the door behind him.

  And suddenly, Shane was left alone in the darkness with nothing but his own thoughts. And for some reason, his thoughts never strayed from Ryan.

  Ryan , with his gorgeous smile and beautiful laugh and soft hair and - Shane wondered how starry-eyed he could get. He smiled softly as he heard Ryan faintly from the closed door.

  Ryan was the bravest person Shane would ever know; he was certain of it. His thoughts were so full of Ryan, Ryan, Ryan , that he barely heard Ryan creep out of the stall.

  “All finished,” He said, weary, “I think I heard a few things, but nothing huge.”

  Shane nodded. “I guess that makes it my turn.”

  Shane walked into the stable and as soon as the door was closed, the room dropped ten degrees. Must be a weird night with the windchill , he thought to himself.

  “Hey demons!” Shane called, “De-mons! De-e-e-e-e-mons! Got anything for me tonight, spooky boys? Got anything for an old pal? Remember when I took the Goatman’s bridge? That’s mine now! And this is gonna be my barn, too!”

  And that’s when Shane heard it - a chuckle. The low battery light on his camera blinked (he needed new ones when he’d replaced them ten minutes ago?). The chuckle only grew louder when Shane tried the door handle and it didn’t work.

  Shane found himself panicking, throwing his body against the door to get it open. As if it were only stuck, it eventually gave way and Shane was thrown from the room, eyes wide and chest heaving.

  “Dude, are you okay?” Ryan asked, reaching for Shane in the darkness. Shane brushed him off, closing himself in. His camera died, beeping loudly before shutting off.

  “I heard something. It was probably just the wind, though,” Shane shook his head, “Oh well - I need new batteries. We’ll have to check the footage in the morning.”

  “I always bring them for demon episodes,” Ryan smiled, handing over a few. Shane exchanged them, grateful when the camera blinked to life. By the time his camera was back online, the feeling of terror had dissipated. Shane could only hope it wouldn’t come back.

  “Well, now that we’ve gone over everything, I think it’s time for us to get some sleep,” Ryan said, nodding to Shane. He still wore a look of concern on his face.

  Shane shook his head minutely, an I’m fine that only Ryan could pick up on, “If you can call it sleep. You’ll keep me up all night with your panicking.”

  Ryan shook his head and laughed. “You asshole. Let’s go upstairs and lay out our sleeping bags.”

  And they did just that, without another word, both of them ever so thankful to share breaths with another human instead of the thing that resided in the corner of the room. Neither of them spoke about it, but they laid their sleeping bags far closer than they normally would.

  “I’m gonna feel like a real idiot listening to tapes of the wind howling tomorrow,” Shane murmured, trying to coax himself into sleep. He kept telling himself he was close to Ryan for Ryan’s comfort - but really, he just needed to be close to someone, to have something to convince himself that the noises in the night were just Ryan rolling over in his sleeping bag.

  .o0o.

  Eugene heard of two strange men that had arrived in town - hell, he’d seen their faces that same day. He heard of the same unsuredness that everyone had greeted Andrew and Steven with. Rumors that they were going to stir up ghosts… and, of course, other rumors. And, as per usual, he thought it was utter bullshit.

  So he maybe turned on the Southern Charm a little more than he usually would have. “Morning, gentlemen, what can I get for you?”

  Eugene ran a diner, a hole-in-the-wall place that made it by sheer force of will. Eugene’s mom and dad had both immigrated from Korea into a tiny town in Tennessee, for what reason Eugene could not fucking place, and they were - as new people often are - greeted with hostility. Eugene had grown up learning all the ways slurs could hurt aside equations. But now that his sisters had left, it was just him: a part of a tiny, insignificant town. Seeing outsiders was rare; seeing outsiders who looked like they’d run a marathon and fought an army on their own was… worrying, to say the least.

  The shorter one had ruffled hair and bloodshot eyes, and the other had eye bags the size of a small dog, and they both looked like they hadn’t changed clothes, like a walk of shame but without the fun part. Eugene thought it best not to ask.

  “Chocolate chip pancakes,” The taller one requested, and the shorter motioned for the same thing. Eugene smiled and told them their order would be right out, yelling to Quinta. Eugene served them some warm milk too. It was his true belief that there was nothing like warm milk for a heavy soul.

  “We didn’t order this,” The shorter said, gesturing to the milk.

  Eugene winked. “It’s on the house. You look stressed.”

  “Thank you,” The taller said, “You have no idea how rough last night was.”

  The shorter  nodded. “Seriously, thanks. I’m Ryan, this is Shane, we’re… new, in case you haven’t noticed.”

  Eugene grinned. “Not a problem! Nice to meet y’all.”

  Eugene went back behind the register and eavesdropped a little.

  “Hey, dude, are you okay?” Shane asked, “You probably didn’t get a lot of sleep last night.”

  Ryan yawned before he replied, proving Shane’s statement. “Nah, ‘m fine, promise.”

  Quinta finished with the pancakes not long after. Eugene looked outside to see a storm beginning to roll in. “Huh - didn’t see that in the forecast.”

  Ryan and Shane exchanged a glance, and Eugene thought maybe there was more to them than met the eye.

  “These pancakes are so fucking good,” Ryan sighed, way too loudly, “Oh - shit - sorry! Wait - fuck -”

  “It’s okay, sweetie,” Quinta said through laughter, “There ain’t nobody here but us.”

  “What fucking time is it anyway?” Eugene wondered, mostly to himself. He checked the clock. “What kind of people wait until after nine thirty to eat breakfast?”

  Another look was shared between Ryan and Shane. “Hey, dude, we’re sorry, but - uhh...”

  “What have you two done?” Eugene asked, feeling a pang of something in his chest. It wasn’t panic, just a… knowing .

  Ryan gulped. “I have a feeling it’s a lot worse than we originally thought.”

  .o0o.

  “Shane - I think we need to get out of here. Soon,” Ryan said as they walked to the Jeep. This time, Shane was in the passenger’s seat, and Ryan was driving.

  “But - listen, Ryan,” Shane pleaded, “I still haven’t finished reading what was in the museum. Please , man, just for one more day? I’ll let you take me on the ghost tour too once the weather clears up.”

  “Fuck you,” Ryan sighed, nodding. They booked a motel with Shane’s debit card, and Shane grinned when Ryan flopped down onto the bed. Luckily, they weren’t in danger of running out of clothes or money any time soon.

  Ryan hoped the rain would stop soon.

  .o0o.

  Steven felt the cold presence of Andrew somehow taken away from him. It was fucking awful - and it was only ten in the morning. It had been a long time coming - Andrew had been distant for a whole day, ever since Ryan and Shane had stayed the night in the barn. Steven had woken up to an empty bed that morning.

  “Babe?” Steven asked after he found him, peering down at his boyfriend  curled up on the couch with the cat. Guilt and anger and insecurity were already starting to rise in his chest. He knew he was jumping to conclusions, but he couldn’t help it.

  Andrew stared into the distance, something that made Steven incredibly uneasy. “Not in the mood, Steven.”

  “Not in the mood for… what?” Steven asked, throat going dry.

  Andrew sat up. “I’m not in the mood for you , Steven. Try again some other time.”

  Steven felt tears in his eyes. “You can’t just not be in the mood for me, Drew! That’s not how relationships work!”

  “It kinda is - and don’t Drew me,” Andrew growled. Riceball, always the coward, had abandoned the couch and run to the bathroom, probably to hide in the sink.

  Something strange overcame him, and all the emotions he didn’t know he was bottling up came out at once. “Y’know, sometimes I don’t feel like I even have a boyfriend! Sometimes I feel like I just have a mannequin who sleeps on the couch all day and pets the cat!”

  “Yeah, well -” Andrew paused for a minute, “It’s not my fault you chose me! Because you did! You chose to be with me! And you can choose to stop.”

“I don’t know where you’ve been for the past few days,” Steven snapped, “But I think Ryan and Shane took a part of you with them. I miss my Drew.”

  “He’s gone, Steven!” Andrew raised his voice, exploding off the couch. “He’s gone - and I’m here.”

  And Andrew’s eyes flicked to black.

  Steven didn’t know how to process what he saw - but there was a part of his brain that was so, so relieved that Andrew wasn’t Andrew. Once he was done being relieved, though, he was terrified.

  “I can hear you thinking,” The demon said, “And I am still some of Andrew. I’m all the parts of him he was afraid to voice before. You know he’s been depressed for years, right? And he never told you. He’d been in all this pain, and you still weren’t trustworthy enough for him to go to.”

  The tears made a forceful return to Steven’s eyes. “That’s a lie! I - I know what it’s like to go through that shit and it’s hard to voice to anyone , even people you’re close to, and -”

  “And he’s not really in love with you,” The demon hissed, “He pities you, he lusts after you - but he’s never really loved you.”

  The color drained from Steven’s face. “He - he -”

  “It’s the truth,” The demon stepped closer to Steven, cupping his face far too gently, “Andrew promised himself to me just to be rid of you.”

  Steven sobbed, trying to flee the house. He made it to the front door and tried the doorknob. It was locked - or, or kept shut or something. Steven whirled around to see some warped version of Andrew’s face, not quite there. Steven’s chest shuddered and his stomach churned and darkness was encroaching the sides of his vision and God , he was going to pass out.

  “I don’t want you gone, I want you with me. Swear yourself to me, darling” The demon purred, “Aw - don’t worry, I can give you a good life in Hell. You’ll be my little pet, pretty thing.” He stroked Steven’s cheek, and Steven pressed himself so hard into the door it hurt.

  He thought, coming to his own conclusion in a matter of seconds. He just needed to know one thing. He forced himself to look the demon in the eyes, and he rasped out, “Will Drew be happy?”

  “I guarantee it,” the demon nodded. “So? What do you say?”

  “I’ll do it,” Steven decided, “Shake on it?”

  Without speaking, the demon grabbed Steven’s face and kissed it, and it burned the image of Not-Quite-Andrew’s face into Steven’s brain. He was gasping for air and no matter how much he struggled, the abyss on the edge of his vision sped closer and closer. Everything felt so… final. Like the sound of a bass drum at the end of a song.

  As his vision faded and his knees gave out, he thought that death like this was a lot more peaceful than someone going to Hell deserved.

  .o0o.

  Shane woke up to a knock on the door. Eugene was there, looking outraged. Shane wished they hadn’t decided to stay in town for a few days just to wait for the stupid ghost tour to start up again.

  “The demon was your fault, right?” Eugene asked, “This… this is all your fault, right?”

  Ryan stirred from his bed, and Shane realized how beat-up Eugene looked. There were cuts littering his knuckles and fingers, and he was in his pajamas and sandals. He looked like he was about half a second away from blowing a fuse.

  Shane spoke, awake enough now to regret not putting anything on over his boxers or changing out of his ratty t-shirt. “I’m sorry if anything happened -”

  “You’re sorry if anything happened? Someone robbed my fucking diner!” Eugene shouted, “I might have to close!”

  “Oh shit,” Ryan said from the other side of the room, stumbling around blindly before finding his glasses and joining Shane at the door, “Dude, I’m so sorry. Are you okay?”

  “Unfortunately I’m not dead or healthy enough to tear you both a new one,” He growled, “But you two are fixing this. Now .”

  “Well, jeez,” Ryan held his hands up in surrender, “Okay, we’ll fix it.”

  Eugene relaxed a bit, letting out a breath. “Thank you.”

  Eugene’s phone rang, and he picked it up. He gasped, rushing out of the building, leaving Shane and Ryan to stare at the empty space on the concrete outside of their motel as the rain continued to pour and pour and pour.

  Shane turned to Ryan. “I guess this means we need to do some research?”

  Ryan nodded, grabbing Shane’s laptop. They closed the door, leaving it unlocked just in case.

  Hours later, and there were so many sources giving different information that Ryan didn't know which way was forward any more. Salt and holy water and repentance all seemed to be common threads, though.

  Suddenly, Eugene came crashing into their motel room with a stranger, who was covered in a leather jacket, soaking wet, and shivering.

  “This is Ned, and he will be staying with you,” Eugene said in a voice that didn’t leave room for negotiation, “He’s momentarily kicked out because of the demon. Deal with it.”

  And then Eugene was gone again, and Ned was looking terrified. “I’m - I - I’m sorry -”

  “Dude, it’s okay,” Ryan soothed, “Do you want a towel? We’re probably pretty close in size, I can lend you some of my clothes while yours dry.”

  Ned nodded, silent. He stayed silent for the rest of the night, sitting in the corner and staring blankly at the wall. Ryan and Shane worked on putting together a viable plan for chasing the demons out of town.

  Ned stood up, suddenly, as if he realized where he was. “What’s all this about demons?”

  “It’s - uh - kinda my fault,” Shane admitted, “I provoked demons - or, just a demon, I think. It’s my shtick on this show Ryan and I do and I guess this time they were just… real? I dunno, this is all a lot for me.”

  “He didn’t believe in ghosts before this,” Ryan said, “And I guess now the evidence is just -”

  “This is too much to be a coincidence,” Shane conceded, “And while I was in the barn - I saw stuff, heard stuff, felt stuff. It’s - I guess it’s real this time.”

  “I was gonna say compelling, but I guess that works too,” Ryan sang, allowing himself to gloat, and turning back to Ned afterwards, “Anyway, we’re going to chase it out. Do you happen to know a priest?”

  .o0o.

  Eugene paced. When he was anxious, he paced, and now there was all this supernatural bullshit on top of everything else. Ned was in serious danger, and he could feel that several others were too. He felt like he needed to rescue someone, like something horrible was going to happen.

  And he’d had a nightmare. He’d dreamed that he was in Andrew’s barn, staring at a shadow that looked down on him, unblinking and seeing everything in his soul like there was nothing to stop it. But there was something stopping it from attacking - a hand was on his, a comfort amidst the darkness. His chest felt tight, though, like he couldn’t breathe. The thing looked at him, and he felt so deeply afraid that he could feel his heart beating irregularly.

  He could see the barn in clear detail, even in the darkness. He could see strands of hay, the railing that marked the beginning of the stairs, the crescent moon outside the loft. The only thing he couldn’t seem to do was move.

  The shadow struggled against whatever was holding it back, and seemed to disappear. Eugene could tell, though, that it wasn’t really gone.

  So he looked to the hand. It had long fingers and it was a little cold but that was okay because Eugene’s hands were warm. Of course, it didn’t occur to Eugene that, in reality, his hands were always freezing. It made sense in the dream, when Shane’s palm squeezed around his and made him feel like he’d make it through the night.

  Eugene woke up and, for a minute, he could’ve sworn he had Steven’s name on the tip of his tongue - but he couldn’t figure out why.

  .o0o.

  Ryan and Shane approached the barn again, the emptiness of it amplified in the rain. There were noises coming from the house, something that sounded like the howling of wind, but too unearthly, and too vivid for something so far away.

  Despite his best efforts, Ryan felt horrible for neglecting to warn Steven and Andrew. He just… hadn’t been able to find them. He couldn’t find their phone numbers, and they hadn’t replied to their emails, and they’d lost the directions to their place until Eugene could give them the directions. Ryan took comfort in the fact that at least he wouldn’t have to say the words “I’m sorry for raising a demon in your barn” any time soon, according to Eugene.

  Ryan struggled against the rain, holy water in hand. It felt like a security blanket to have, even though Ryan was still anxious about it not working or becoming too diluted in the rain and even as his shirt was soaked and he grew cold to the bone. Shane stood beside him, clearly just as terrified as he was.

  “Remember, don’t let it get to you,” Shane yelled over the booming thunder, “This is only as dangerous as your mind makes it out to be.”

  Ryan honestly didn’t know what to expect - there was so much conflicting information that it terrified him to think of what was behind the door. And then he heard Andrew scream out.

  Ryan crashed through the door, vial of holy water raised, to find Steven holding a knife to Andrew’s neck. “One more step and your blood won’t be the only blood spilled tonight.”

  Steven’s eyes were jet black - but that was an understatement. Steven’s eyes were like negative mass, so empty they beckoned Ryan in a way that felt inevitable.

  “Soon,” The demon crowed, “Soon, soon, soon, my brothers and sisters will arrive, and we will make this town so full of sin it rots from the inside out.”

  Andrew looked petrified, tear tracks on his face. His chest heaved.

  “Get out of my friend!” Ryan cried, rushing the demon and throwing holy water onto it.

  And then, silence fell over the room, and everything slowed down. The demon laughed, pushing Andrew aside, letting him crumple to the floor like a ragdoll.

  Shane rushed to his side.

  “You’re a complete idiot, Ryan Steven Bergara,” The demon’s use of Ryan’s full name sent a horrible chill down his spine. “Did you really believe that old superstition?”

  “It’s not - not a superstition,” Ryan’s eyes widened. “And anyway, I’m not afraid of you.”

  “You sure seem afraid.” The demon grinned, smile contorted and wide, “Are you afraid of me, Ryan?”

  “No!” Ryan said, heart hammering in his chest. Shane and Andrew looked on, completely forgotten.

  The demon narrowed its eyes, hand on Ryan’s chest. “Then why don’t you prove it?”

  Ryan swung his fist at Steven’s face, connecting solidly with his skull. The noise of Ryan’s knuckles cracking against Steven’s head rang out into the dead silent room. The demon blinked back, brown irises flickering in and out of focus.

  “Ow - holy shit!” Steven nearly screamed, gripping his head with his hands and sinking to the floor. His eyes bulged and he trembled.

  Ryan dropped to his knees in front of him. “Dude I’m so fucking sorry - are you okay? Holy shit -”

  “Shut the fuck up!” Steven cried, pressing into his temples and whimpering. Andrew scrambled over, tackling him in a hug.

  “I thought I lost you.”

  “I thought I said shut up,” Steven groaned, curling up tightly in his arms. Andrew kissed his hair, pulling him close.

  The scene was tense, Shane moving to check Ryan’s knuckles, which had started to throb. Shane’s eyes met Ryan’s and for a moment, the danger had passed. Lightning caused the lights to flicker, and Shane swore, disappointed.

  Ryan let Shane hold him, let him rock back and forth on his heels, let the energy heal. He gripped his injured hand in his whole one.

  Slowly, Steven uncurled and let out a long breath.

  “I love you, baby,” Andrew said quietly, choked up. Ryan’s heart ached, a knife in his chest cavity because he could only imagine what it would be like to be that with Shane. It was a quiet ache, though, background to the panic still residing in his chest.

  When Steven had enough of himself back to ask to be alone, Andrew patted Steven’s shoulder. “Thank you. You’re a brave man, Ryan.”

  Ryan looked to Andrew, finding the stony face he’d grown accustomed to looking back. “Of course. Thank you.”

  Ryan and Shane went back to the motel, leaving Andrew to put Steven back together.

  .o0o.

  Andrew cupped Steven’s face, kissing him softly. “I really did think I had lost you, baby. I’m so sorry. I tried so hard to fight off the demon, but he -”

  “Did you?” Steven asked, blinking up at the ceiling, “Because I heard otherwise.”

  Andrew seemed confused. “What do you mean?”

  “I mean the demon said you wanted to get rid of me!” Steven raised his voice, wincing as his headache came back, “That you pitied me and - and you didn’t trust me, and -”

  Steven sniffled and Andrew wanted to cry. “Steven, I - that’s not true. You know it’s not. I’ve never loved someone like I’ve loved you.”

  “The demon said you’d been depressed for a long time and never told me and I -”

  “That’s true,” Andrew muttered, “That part’s true. I just - I didn’t want you to worry. I wanted you to think I was being a lazy asshole and not to think I was just too empty to feel anything because -”

  “I did something horrible,” Steven realized, looking Andrew in the eye, “I thought the demon was telling the truth and I - I sold my soul to it, I think.”

  “For what?”

  “For you to be happy.”

  .o0o.

  Eugene held Ned as he shook. There was something small about his friend that Eugene hadn’t seen since he’d come out.

  “I…” Ned whispered, “My mom kicked me out. She told me she didn’t want a sinner in the house, Eugene.”

  “I’m sorry,” Eugene stroked Ned’s hair, rage flying through his chest. This wouldn’t have happened if Shane and Ryan had known their place. Something in Eugene told him it could only get worse before it got better, and Eugene was terrified of that feeling - especially since his feelings tended to be incredibly accurate as of late.

  Ned looked up to Eugene. “I want Ariel back.”

  “She’ll be back soon, and the demon will leave,” Eugene said, as though he were stating the end of a story he knew by heart. He hoped there was some weight to his statement. Ned took a deep breath collapsed onto one of the beds, staring up at the popcorn ceiling like it was full of stars.

  Eugene sat at the small table in the corner of Ryan and Shane’s room. They’d given him a key - said it would be a group effort. Eugene just wanted the demon gone so they could go too.

  “Wh - why are you two still here?” Shane asked impatiently when he and Ryan got back to the room. Ryan was nursing some sort of wound and, as Eugene noticed Shane was apt to do, Shane was treating it like a minor emergency.

  “We’re here until you fix this shit,” Eugene stated, “Quinta’s not here because her brother lives out of the city and she could get out.”

  Shane sighed. “Okay, but I need you to move so I can get to the sink.”

  Eugene obliged, moving from where he was leaning on the counter. Shane turned on the sink’s light, looking at Ryan’s hand. His knuckles looked bruised and a little swollen.

  “What did that brick wall do to you to deserve this?” Eugene joked, and Ryan looked at him with eyes so full of guilt and sadness that Eugene legitimately felt sorry for a minute. For a minute. And then he remembered that Ryan and Shane brought this upon themselves. Shane let Ryan tuck himself up against him as he checked Ryan’s hand, putting an ice pack on it.

  Shane didn’t step away, though. He just stood there, letting himself relax against Ryan’s body. “I thought I was going to lose you for a minute there.”

  “You thought…” Ryan looked up to him and, God , Eugene thought he was going to have to squish their heads together if they didn’t kiss soon. Shane was looking down at him with fear in his eyes. He really does love him , Eugene thought, glancing between their faces.

  They both said, wordlessly, “I love you.”

  Then, Ryan stood up on his toes and kissed Shane. Shane moved to cup his face, the kiss sweet and soft, and Eugene kinda wanted to barf. He was never a huge fan of kisses. He was a child of divorce, and all that.

  For someone who didn’t have a lot of faith in love, Eugene had a lot of faith in Ryan and Shane. He almost trusted them. Or, he wanted to - they were cute.

  Ned looked just as uncomfortable as Eugene felt. Shane turned to them when he realized they were still there, surprised. Eugene raised an eyebrow at him.

  “Oh, don’t stop on our account.” Eugene grinned, as Ned wolf-whistled.

  “I dunno, it seems like he’s enjoying the free show,” Shane said, nodding to Ned. Ryan, however, didn’t find the situation very funny.

  Ned laughed, and Ryan’s face only grew redder as he got more worked up.

  “I’m sorry, when you have any ideas on how to get rid of the demon that don’t include punching possessed people in the face, come talk to me,” Ryan narrowed his eyes at Ned. Everyone blinked at him, stunned into silence.

  “If I was wrong about the brick wall, who was it?” Asked Eugene, seeming vaguely intrigued by the concept.

  Ryan shook his head a bit, leaning into Shane. “Steven.”

  “You punched Steven ?” Ned’s mouth fell open, “Dude - that’s like, a capital offense in Andrew’s book. How are you still alive?”

  “I dunno,” Ryan laughed, “The fact that about thirty seconds prior he was threatening to kill him might’ve done it.”

  “God, you guys really did get close to dying,” Ned said, astonished, “I had no fucking clue.”

  “Generally, when people say they’re being attacked by demons, they aren’t kidding,” Shane interjected, “So - Eugene, you got any solutions yet?”

  Eugene thought on it a moment. “Actually, I think I do. A while ago, I had a dream. I think I was Ryan - I dunno. I was in a sleeping bag and Shane, you were curled up next to me and I couldn’t move and there was a demon standing right at my feet but I don’t think he could touch me -”

  “So… what are you saying?” Shane quirked an eyebrow at him. Ryan looked shocked for a minute, but he took Eugene’s dream in stride incredibly well.

  “That maybe, the key is love, or something,” Eugene frowned, “I dunno. Dreams aren’t an exact science. And that sounds like bullshit.”

  “I read somewhere that the trick was just to not be afraid of it,” Ryan shrugged, “But I tried that, and wound up punching Steven in the face, and, I mean, it worked, but the gloom ‘n stuff is still here.”

  “Were you really unafraid, though?” Eugene asked, his own piercing eyes reflected in Ryan’s startled ones, “You were brave, yes. But bravery and being unafraid… those are two different things.”

  Ryan snorted. “I’m not stupid -”

  “Ryan,” Eugene said, flatly, “We need to find a way to stop this thing before someone gets hurt - or worse.”

  “What if we burned the barn?” Ned suggested, looking to the group. They looked back at him. “It’d be a pretty damn good display of being unafraid, and without a central source, maybe the demon will leave?”

  Eugene blinked. “That could work. We’ll need to ask Steven and Andrew, though.”

  Ten minutes later and, across town Andrew sighed into his phone.

  “If you really think this will work.”

  .o0o.

  Ned creeped into the barn, feeling the wind raise the hair on his arm. Voices whispered to him, and he felt like running away or simply falling to the ground, clutching at his hair and screaming until they went away. They whispered horrible things about him. It was middle school all over again, when word that he was trans got out and ran wild. It was complete with insecurity, the need to hide his chest, the erratic feeling of paranoia in his lungs and toes as endless voices muttered that he’d never really be a man. It hurt like Hell.

  But he pressed on, to the quarantine stable. Armed with gasoline and a bundle of matches, he hoped that the rain wouldn’t wash everything away before the barn burned to the ground.

  He knew the others were outside with more fuel, anyway. He started in the quarantine stable, making sure to use a lot of gasoline there. He moved around the corners of the barn and, as he exited, he lit the match and dropped it onto a trail of gasoline.

  It felt cathartic, really. Like he was burning all the horrible people he’d come into contact with. Like he was burning the people who’d ignored him after he came out to them, or worse. Like he was burning up his whole past, like he was about to watch it go up in flames. He walked up to the front knowing he was going to enjoy this very, very much.

  And walked straight into the door.

  He tried the handle - when had he closed the door? - and he banged on it as the flames began to lick up the walls, creeping closer and closer to him. The room grew unbearably hot, Ned’s leather jacket sticking to his skin and hair damp on his face.

  “Let me out!” He screamed, “Somebody help!”

  The door shook with the force of Ned throwing his body against it. Just as the flames began to burn his leg, the door splintered around the lock and he fell into Eugene’s arms, shaking.

  “It’s okay, it’s okay,” Eugene said, softer than Eugene had said anything, ever, “You’re safe now. Are you hurt?”

  Ned nodded - he’d been burned and there were splinters in his leg and just above his collar. Eugene spent the night doting after him, picking out the splinters carefully and pressing cool cloths to his burns. Ned was so shaken that it took him awhile after that to even talk, nevermind process the fact that he almost died. Shane and Ryan took one bed, Eugene and Ned took the other. Ned didn’t talk about the fact that Eugene held him close despite the fact that he knew Eugene hated cuddling.

  .o0o.

  Zach tripped over a rock, papers flying everywhere and heart thumping so loud he thought the whole town could hear. He scrambled back up, ankle feeling like it was malfunctioning. He had too much adrenaline in his system to feel much in the way of pain, but he knew he’d scraped up his legs and palms pretty good, and that he had a very sprained ankle.

  But he kept hobbling on, as fast as he could go without falling right over again. He had to get somewhere. He didn’t know where, just - somewhere.

  Zach was naturally clumsy at the best of times, so of course he’d tripped over the rock when he was running for his life in the middle of the night. His lungs still burned, even as he slowed to what felt like a brutally meager pace.

  Then, someone appeared in front of him. A hooded figure - Zach couldn’t see its face. A switchblade clicked, and Zach put his arms out, pleading on his tongue, preparing for the worst.

  .o0o.

  Eugene turned on the radio as everyone else looked out at the continuing downpour. By now, there was some minor flooding going on. Ryan kicked the wall.

  “Dammit!” He swore, “Fuck!”

  “Woah, dude, what’s going on?” Ned asked, eyes wide.

  Eugene answered before Ryan could speak. “He’s angry at himself for agreeing to burn the barn, even though he wasn’t the one who suggested it, and it was as good of an idea as anything else.”

  “Dude - what the fuck? How did you know that?” Ryan exclaimed.

  Eugene shrugged. “I dunno. I’m starting to think I’m psychic. It makes sense - back in Korea my mother was weaned on the teat of the town psychic.”

  “Wh -” Ryan wheezed, cutting himself off.

  “I’m serious!” Eugene said, “It hasn’t really been a thing until now, but the more I think about it, the more it makes sense!”

  Shane and Ryan exchanged another one of their glances , and Eugene glared at them. And that’s when the radio said something that caught their attention.

  The woman’s crackly voice was quieter than anybody’s, but the word “murder” caused the room to fall silent.

  “-f twenty-seven year old Zach Kornfeld shocks the town. He was found stabbed to death in Wilder Park, at the hands of someone police simply can’t identify. With no witnesses and next to no evidence, there are currently no suspects.”

  Ned turned to Eugene. “Bud, I’m sorry -”

  But Eugene was just staring at the radio, unblinking, unmoving. Ned looked crestfallen too, to say the least. Ryan was reminded of just how small a town it was - Ned and Eugene probably knew Zach. Ryan felt horribly guilty. It really was his fault.

  “Don’t even start blaming yourself,” Shane murmured, hand wrapped around Ryan’s waist. Eugene looked like he was having trouble breathing. He was having a panic attack, Ryan vaguely thought, as he nestled himself into Shane’s side like the guilty, selfish thing he was. Eugene collapsed onto his knees, and still, Ryan watched on as Ned helped him, almost like Ned wasn’t really there, just something blank to guide Eugene away from his terror.

  Eugene gasped and swallowed, spitting out, “Everything’s falling apart.”

  Ned’s hand stroked Eugene’s back as he looked out to the torrential downpour. “I just wish the demon would get it over with and end us. I just wish he’d stop our suffering once and for all.”

  Ryan thought of Steven. For some of them, their suffering wouldn’t stop at all. It felt like years had passed, and they’d only been in town for a few days.

  “You’re right,” Shane said, stepping away from Ryan. “Everything is changing. But - okay - maybe there’s a bright side to this?”

  “Where?” Eugene asked, so quietly it might as well have not been there, “Where’s the goddamned bright side? My friend is dead , Shane, and my other friend sold his soul and this psychic stuff isn’t nearly as cool as I’d imagined!”

  “We don’t know for sure that you’re -”

  Eugene lunged at Shane, held back by Ned. “I do! I do, and I know for a fact that if it weren’t for you, or something, Ryan would be fucking dead too! And you would be just as scared as I am!”

  “I - I’m sorry, man,” Shane blinked, “I didn’t even believe in this shit a few days ago. I just wanted to come here with Ryan and watch him get scared out of his mind and laugh like we always do - and now - and now I’m responsible for so many horrible things and I -”

  Ryan just watched the scene as though he were behind a veil. Like he wasn’t even there. Shane sobbed and Ryan reached out for him but Shane ran out before Ryan could get his hand to his shoulder.

  Ryan shook, even if he couldn’t really feel it - as if his whole body was in front of the veil, his hand pressed to his mouth. Eugene was silent beside him, staring at the wall, and Ned looked like he was stuck between helping them or chasing after Shane. He walked to the door, closing it, and turned to face them again. He blinked, and his eyes were pitch black.

  .o0o.

  Shane made it a few blocks before he stopped on the sidewalk, dropping to his knees. “Please!” He begged, staring up at the abysmal sky, “Please - I know I haven’t believed in you for a long, long time - but I need answers and I don’t have them!”

  He screamed up at the sky in the empty night, pleading to someone he didn’t believe in to do something he didn’t believe God could do. His last please, I can’t lose him echoed through Main Street, greeting Shane’s ears just as they’d left them. Meaningless and facetious and just a way for Shane to cast doubt onto someone else. Shane sobbed into his palms, feeling his jacket soak onto his skin.

  He felt truly hopeless for once in his life. No answers, and the questions kept piling on and on and on. So he sat there, freezing, in the rain, letting it fall over his face and get in his eyes. If this was a movie, there would be a swell of music as the cameras closed in on Shane’s face, capturing it in the most beautiful light possible.

  But it wasn’t beautiful - and it wasn’t loud. It was quiet except for the sounds of Shane’s lamenting and the sheets of rain that just kept coming, and it was ugly, the way Shane’s face crumbled, the way his back hunched, the way he’d acted. Everything about his situation was ugly and quiet and it made Shane want to scream again. But if he did, he still wouldn’t have any answers. And, anyway, nobody would come to check on him.

  Shane looked over to find a shop - closed. But it drew Shane’s attention. He supposed it was the gloom or the demon’s influence or whatever, but he was attracted to it like a magnet. He stopped crying and took off his jacket, using it to smash open the glass door. No alarm.

  Shane walked in and picked apart the scene. It was a small, hole-in-the-wall place, decorated with nerdy posters and memorabilia. Shane looked at the desk at the front, and started looking for something. He didn’t know quite what. Then, he found it - a tattered book laying on the worn carpet floor. It looked as though it had been dropped.

  It had a name and a number written on it. Zach Kornfeld , Shane read, and felt sick to his stomach.

  And Shane told himself dead men don’t need books , and he opened it.

  Demons are a most foul creature, wretched souls that have been tortured so endlessly that their souls cease to be human, instead consumed by their own pain and suffering.

  Shane read along, a few sentences catching his attention. Demons feed on fear and hatred, so lack of either emotion should get rid of them , in pen, by the typed text.

  Huh. So Eugene was right.

  Another typed note caught his attention as he skimmed the rest of it. If a person sells their soul, and the demon who made the deal with them is destroyed, that person is free from the deal.

  Shane had to share this with them - he ran back to the hotel room, a fire in his lungs that was mostly there due to the fact that he was, like, super out of shape. His legs burned and his shoulder hurt for some weird reason and damn , Shane made a mental note to go running more often with Ryan when they got out of this hellhole.

  Of course, now that he thought about it, leaving the town felt almost… wrong. Like he was stuck in a fishbowl with nowhere to go, and if he left he’d cease to breathe. He arrived at the door to their room, and pounded on it with his fist.

  “Ryan! I don’t have the key - let me in! I know how to kill the demon!” Shane shouted over the wind, which had picked up, almost as if the demon knew Shane knew. But there wasn’t a reply. Shane, panicked, glanced out at the parking lot. Their Jeep was still there, so where was Ryan?

  Shane knocked on the door again. “Ryan? Eugene? Ned?”

  He stopped and listened and he could feel something wrong in the room. It wasn’t just his paranoia - there was something horrible in there.

  Shane grew frantic again, bruising his palm on the door. “Let me in! Get away from Ryan - fuck! - I love him! Let me - let me in!”

  The door swung open. Ryan and Eugene were sitting together in the corner, hands bound and mouths gagged with some strange thing that Shane couldn’t place. Oh well , he thought, It’s just weird demon goo, then .

  “You love him?” Ned asked, black eyes and silver tongue giving the demon away, “You really, really love him?”

  Ryan’s eyes widened, and Eugene shook his head, as if he knew they were doomed.

  “I think I do, you demon fuck,” Shane snarled, “And if you touch him -”

  “Don’t worry,” The demon said, “I won’t touch a hair on his pretty little head. I’m sure you know by now that love will kill me, oh woe!” The demon pressed a hand to its forehead, pretending to faint. “I’m so scared.”

  “You should be, ‘cus I’m not scared of you,” Shane hissed, eyes narrowed, “Why would I be?”

  The demon almost seemed taken aback, but it smiled anyway. “You may not be afraid of me - but your crush? Your little infatuation, your little project ? He’s terrified of me. I can touch him - I can hurt him all I want. But if you truly love him - if you don’t want that to happen, you’ll kill Eugene.”

  Shane found himself holding a knife, the book safely in the demon’s hands. “Do it - do it, Shane. Prove that you love Ryan, and I’ll be forced to leave.”

  Shane glanced between Ryan and Eugene, and back to the knife in his hand. And then, Shane dropped to his knees and set the knife down. He cast Ryan one more pleading look.

  “I’m not going to kill Eugene,” Shane said, swallowing and taking a shaky breath before continuing, “Because he doesn’t deserve that. But Ryan doesn’t deserve pain either. Please, if you’re gonna hurt anyone, hurt me. Because I love him too much to see him suffer. Please .”

  The demon laughed. It looked between Ryan and Eugene and Shane, and laughed. “You really think I’ll do what you say? You’re pitiful. I’ll hurt him, and you’ll watch, and then… when I’m done with him, I’ll hurt you.”

  Shane ignored the demon, trying a new tactic, and turned to Ryan. “Please, baby - I promise it can’t hurt you if you aren’t afraid. Just - just think about me, okay?”

  Ryan nodded, and Shane pressed forward into this unfamiliar territory, “Think of me with my arms around you, watching basketball or whatever, and - and think of going out on dates to Knott’s Berry farm and - and just try to stop being afraid. I know you - I know you can do it, okay, baby?”

  Shane had never really talked to someone like that, but it did something to Ryan. His shoulders squared up and he had tears in his eyes.

  “Okay, I’ve had enough of this,” The demon said, and the knife rose into the air and flew at Ryan. He stared at it as it approached, and Shane thought of Ryan buying him flowers, Ryan going window shopping with him and making fun of the latest fashion trends, Ryan going to cheap haunted houses with him, anything but the sound of Ryan screaming.

  And then, he realized Ryan wasn’t screaming. The knife had stopped a few inches from Ryan’s abdomen, and the demon kept flicking its wrist like something would happen. But it just twitched lifelessly, like it was stuck.

  Ryan tentatively tried at the bonds on his wrist, which fell apart. He spat out the gag and rushed over to Shane, tackling him in a hug. “It worked - holy shit, holy shit, Shane - it worked!”

  Shane kissed Ryan fully. The demon, in a body that was seeming more and more to be Ned’s, blinked.

  And then the demon screamed. It was an unearthly sound that pierced Shane’s ears - but somehow, he couldn’t care less. Ryan kissed back, and there was a blinding flash of light. The bonds at Eugene’s wrists fizzled away, but not before leaving the demon’s last mark. Eugene hissed as the imprint of the bonds was burned onto his skin.

  After a minute, Eugene spoke. “Do y’all hear that?” He said softly, eyes full of wonder.

  “Hear what?” Asked Ryan, still on Shane’s chest. His voice was slightly muffled by Shane’s jacket.

  “The rain stopped.”

  .o0o.

  Steven was still awake. It was six in the morning and he hadn’t slept and somehow, at some point, the rain had stopped. But that meant the demon could be back at any moment to collect him.

  “I love you,” Andrew said, like it was the last time he’d ever be able to.

  Steven sighed. “I love you too, buddy.”

  “You can’t call me buddy, we’re practically married,” Andrew rolled his eyes, “And, hey, listen -” He got serious, “Even if at some point you’re going to be taken away to Hell, or whatever, these years will still have been the best of my life. Even if the demon promised I’d be happy - I can’t really be happy without you.”

  “Were you, though?” Steven asked, “You never denied that you’d been depressed.”

  “Steven, I - you know I couldn’t help that -”

  “Well, you could have asked me for help! Partners are supposed to support each other! And I’m not just here for you when you’re happy!” Steven raised his voice, stomping his foot, and immediately feeling bad about his outburst. “I’m sorry - I’m just scared for you sometimes.”

  Andrew looked a little taken aback, and then his eyes softened. “I love you so much. I’ll - I’ll try to tell you next time.”

  “Thank you,” Steven breathed, relaxing a bit and kissing Andrew’s cheek. “I love you.”

  “I love you too.”

  .o0o.

  Ned looked wary as he waited for his mom at the park. When she arrived, though, he relaxed. She looked as though she had been crying. A lot.

  “Ned - honey,” She said, already looking uncomfortably close to tears, “I’m so sorry - I’m so, so sorry - I don’t know what came over me, but I was so terrified -”

  Ned’s resolve to be angry at his mom broke and he rushed forward, scooping her up in a hug. “Mom, it’s okay! It’s okay. You were afraid. We all do horrible things when we’re scared.”

  Ned’s mom shook her head, “It’s not okay! I was so scared of the Lord’s judgment for my baby that I kicked him out. That’s never okay. You know I’ve been going to that nondenominational church lately, where they focus a lot more on tolerance, and -”

  “And I love you for it,” Ned said, squeezing her and letting her go, “You’re doing your best. And I know you didn’t mean it - I think the rain just got to you.”

  Ned’s mom nodded, and Eugene noticed they were both crying. Eugene smiled, his own eyes watery.

  Eugene knew everything would be okay for Ned. Ariel would be back in town, soon, and Ned’s mom would give him more leftovers more often for a while before everything went back to the way it had always been.

  And it was all like it was before, except Eugene and Ned had a few more scars and a few more stories they couldn’t share.

  .o0o.

  Ryan and Shane left the next weekend. Steven was assured that the demon was obliterated and couldn’t take him to Hell, Ned had reconciled with his mother, Eugene had found the man who’d robbed him and had the money returned (plus some extra for damages).

  As Shane packed the filming equipment back up into the jeep, he turned to Ryan. “This feels wrong, right?”

  “Yeah.” Ryan nodded, “Like… like we’ve been through so much in this town we belong here now?”

  Shane gave a small noise of agreement. “Yeah. Like we’re leaving ourselves behind.”

  Shane didn’t think he’d belong there, either, though. Like they didn’t belong anywhere, now.

  They stood there for a moment, and Shane climbed into the driver’s side of the Jeep. Ryan took a seat on the passenger’s side. They passed the diner on the way out, and Ryan saw the vigil for Zach taking place in the recently repaired front room. Ryan turned to Shane, who had his aviator sunglasses on and hair windswept. His heart still hurt.

  Ryan watched the fields pass them by in a slow, melancholy way. He didn’t feel free any more. Just like he was the same small, trapped thing he’d been when the demon had inhabited Ned’s body back at the motel. He wanted to go to Zach’s vigil so bad, but Shane had promised that they would not be missed. They hadn’t even said goodbye.

  “Do you think there’s more demons out there?” Ryan asked as they stopped for gas.

  Shane thought a moment, and nodded. “Absolutely.”

  “Wanna never get involved with another one again?” Ryan leaned up against Shane, both of them looking out at the fading dusk around them.

  Shane paused again. “Absolutely.”

[thetaekswoon]

BTS Jungkook| Stable Boy AU

So I really wanted to make this AU not only because I love Jungkook, but also because as a horseback rider I really love seeing AUs that revolve around horses.  That being said, I love being able to connect with the “reader” in a story in a way that I actually am similar or have similar interests as the person in the AU instead of them being generic.  Please submit some of your hobbies or passions so that I can specialize AUs to more people everywhere!

Anyway here is the AU, hope you enjoy!

Jungkook

Jungkook started working at the Chestnut Lakes Equestrian Center because he had always been curious about horses and as a kid he kind of always wanted to learn how to ride, but it was too expensive so he just settled for watching races on tv and thinking about how cool it would be.

As he grew up, Jungkook would accept small jobs at the county fair and whatnot working with the horses and ponies.

Everyone could see that he had a real special way of connecting with the animals and could always be the first one to tell what was wrong with them.

lol Jungkook is kind of like the horse whisperer tbh...

, and though he never learned to ride he has grown content with just spending time around the horses,

So when he heard that the fancy stables in town was hiring a new stable hand, he immediately jumped at the idea of working with such incredible and majestic creatures everyday instead of just doing all these side jobs.

Word travels around fast in the horse industry, so when Chestnut Lakes hears all about Jungkook’s skills with the horses they instantly hire him and a groom/technically unqualified horse therapist

It takes Jungkook a really long time to adjust to working at such a upscale facility because tbh most of the owners are incredibly wealthy and uptight about everything involving their horse,

“Bacardi must only be walked, never put into the pasture with the other horses,” and Jungkook is like, “But he’s A HORSE?  HE NEEDS TO RUN AND ROLL AROUND IN THE GRASS?”

As, many of the riders don’t care for their own horses, like they have Kook or one of the other stable hands groom and tack up their horse and then when their done riding have them untack and massage the leg muscles.

Chestnut Lakes Equestrian Center is really fancy too, like the stables are huge and made of stone with high ceilings and wooden beams, and all the riding rings are precise,

there’s a large fountain in front of the main stable, and all the landscaping is trimmed and pruned every week.

all the horses have fancy leather halters with their names engraved on them, kinda vibes.

But it’s not all that bad, I mean, besides working with the horses, one of the perks is that Jungkook has his own room to live in on the 2nd floor of the stable, next to the hayloft, but it’s clean and has a bathroom and is all his for when he stays the night to take care of any sick horses.

is friends with the other stable hand Taehyung, who is a complete mess and Jungkook always needs to help him with distributing the supplements and vitamins cause otherwise Tae would do it wrong no matter how many times he is told.

I feel like I need to make it clear that Kook as a stable hand is HOT, like really attractive,

because the job is dirty sometimes, he always wears worn in jeans that look really good on him and timberlands (obviously)

Jungkook is really strong and muscular because he needs to be in order to deal with a horse since they’re three times the size he is, and because the equipment and trunks and all really heavy.

everyone loves stealing glances at him on hay day because he has sleeves rolled up so that you can see his arm muscles, while he carries all the new hay bales which are all also very heavy...

And though everyone gawks at him all the time, he never really notices and is very much kept to himself and the horses.

Like Taehyung is his only friend at the barn and he’s ok with that.

wears bracelets made out of the twine around the hay bales.  And sometimes when it is really hot outside, like during the summer months he wears this old pale blue baseball cap.

He likes spending his breaks in the pastures with some of the horses he works with, and it’s actually incredible like, the horses love him so much that they will actually like lay down next to him in the grass and doze off

always carries peppermints in his back pockets for the horses,,,,, and for himself

boi always has some kind of hard candy in his mouth,

And then you come along...

You just moved to the area and not going to lie, you come from a much wealthier family, and you own your own fancy Dutch Warmblood named Apollo and after scouting the area decide that Chestnut Lakes is the stables that you want to board at.

Your horse Apollo is enormous and beautiful, he is a gelding (neutered male horse) and has a silky dark black coat, with pure white socks on each foot, a thick blaze that runs down his face, has a pink muzzle, and stands at a little above 17 hands tall.

(hands are how you measure horses, essentially a hand is around 4 inches, 17 hands is a pretty tall horse considering they are measured from the ground to their withers which is their shoulder, kinda, that’s just the jist of it for understanding)

And you love Apollo, he is a very strong eventing horse (which means you compete in all three events, dressage, show jumping and cross country) and though he basically has a perfect temperment, he is terrified of being inside a trailer.

It is a warm spring day (teehee) when you arrive at Chestnut Lakes, Apollo is in the trailer and is kicking, making a lot of noise, and overall his making a huge scene.

Jungkook hears this from inside the stables and runs out to see what the problem is, but by the time he is out you already have Apollo out of the trailer and are calming him down with gentle words and soft strokes down his neck.

and tbh Jungkook can’t help but stare because it really is a sight to behold.

I mean, there you are with your horse who has complete trust in you, looking you in the eyes,

but also you are kind of on the shorter side, and since your horse stands so tall proportionally it just looks a little funny, and Kook can’t help but admire you from afar.

When you are done with calming down your horse, you take your time walking him into the barn, allowing him to adjust to his new home, letting him sniff a bit and put his head towards the ground.

One of the other stable hands tells you where they set up the new stall for Apollo and you make your way down the beautiful stable hall till you reach the stall,

, and there is Jungkook, still fixing up the bedding in the box.

“Oh, um, sorry, I’m just about done here.” He says to you, and you can’t help but blush a little bit because well, Jungkook is really attractive and seems a little insecure, and you also have a really nice very of his butt from this angle, along with the fact that you are just meeting, awe

and you’re like, “no no, I just wanted to let him gather his wits for a moment.  We just were in the trailer for a couple hours, I was hoping to walk him around for a little bit to help him stretch,”

And Jungkook is like oh, that’s right well I better start walking him then, and goes to take the lead rope from you, but you’re just like wait what? no.

Jungkook is kind of shocked tbh because all of the other riders here don’t really care about their horses or want to deal with all the other things besides riding,

, but not you?  “No, I’ll take him it’s fine.” You say, and he kind of just nods.  “I’m Y/N by the way, and this is Apollo.” You tell him, and your voice is awkward, but he still smiles and reaches out to shake your hand,

awkwardly laughing, “hi, I’m Jungkook”

Jungkook then tells you the best places to walk Apollo and you thank him greatly before clicking your tongue and moving along with your horse.

You can’t help but think, oh my god Jungkook, he’s so attractive and sweet and his face is so nice and his hands were soft...

Jungkook is thinking the same thing, leaning against the stall door.

Fast forward a few weeks and you and Apollo have finally made yourselves comfortable in the new stables.

You haven’t had a hard time making friends with all the other girls who board their horses at CL, but over this time you have become closest with Jungkook and Taehyung.

You have always been the girl who has many guy friends, but it also had to do with the fact that they were the most real and down to earth of all the people at the facility.

Like they never talk about silly things like new limited edition horse blankets that will ‘make them look so cute in the winter!’, but will casually talk about idk, normal people things haha.

And you are not the only one getting closer to the boys, Apollo is completely trusting of Jungkook, maybe even more so than he is of you, and you just tell Kook that it’s because of all the peppermints he gives him, but deep down you know that it’s just his way with the horses.

And tbh you still have a teeny tiny crush on Kook since the first time you two spoke, but now you two have some casual friendship, and you’re not really sure if a relationship is something you need at the moment since you are so busy training for this big competition in a little over a month.

When you’re riding Jungkook and Tae will sometimes make excuses to watch you and Apollo train in the ring.

It’s really cute Tae keeps saying that he is going to make a giant banner for you when you actually go to your competition,

but that will never actually happen for several reasons, the first being that it could scare the horses and second that he couldn’t actually go to the show because Jungkook is technically Apollo’s groom so he is the one that will travel with you to events.

The first time you ever see Jungkook wearing his old blue baseball cap, you are so struck by how pretty he looks with it on, his hair is pushed out of his face and the such, that you actually avoid him for as long as possible because you knew that you’d be too distracted to formulate actual sentences.

(Now while we are on the topics of hats and accessories, though this is not his AU it is still essential to know that Taehyung wears a lot of bandanas at the stables, A LOT of BANDANAS)

One day you show up a few hours earlier than you usually do because your lecture class had been cancelled, and you are surprised to find that Apollo isn’t in his stall?!?

but you quickly realize that since you are early he is most likely out in the pastures, so you check the list in the tack room to see which pasture he is in, and then you head over to go collect him so that you could practice this new dressage move,

when you get to the pasture you are actually stunned.

Jungkook is sitting underneath this ancient oak tree in the middle of the pasture and appears to be dozing off, and Apollo is completely lying down next to him on his side with his big head in Jungkook’s lap.

Never once has Apollo even been that comfortable with you, and you’re his owner!

You are not jealous, but more amazed at what you are seeing.  Jungkook is lightly stroking Apollo’s neck, and with his head back against the oak he look so beautiful, so ethereal.

You don’t want to really disturb them, but you still enter the paddock, Kookie looking up to you, but not saying anything, and you sit yourself down next to him.

It’s quiet and you don’t say anything to each other for a while, until you think you can hear Jungkook saying something about how pretty your hair is, but when you ask if he did he denies it and looks the other way.

You can’t help but blush and look the other way too.

Again ever since that moment in the pasture you and Jungkook seem a little awkward with each other, but not enough that Tae notices, and you are finally starting to accept that you have a serious crush on Kook when one day you are falling asleep and you get a call.

You’re a little angry because it is one in the morning, but Jungkook is calling you so you answer and he’s panicking, “It’s Apollo,” he says, “I think he’s colicing, I’m not sure, I’ve never had to deal with this before I don’t know what to do I already called the vet but it’ll take him an hour to get here and I don’t know if I’m doing this right, oh my god Y/N, please your show is in three weeks, and it’s Apollo.”

You have never driven so fast in your life, you get to the barn in a record ten minutes, and you can see all the lights in the stable are on.

You rush in, wearing your silly shark patterned pajama pants, sleep tee, uggs and an old sweatshirt with holes throughout, and you see Jungkook pacing with Apollo up and down the length of the stables.

Apollo is covered in sweat and it is dripping off of him and he looks like he is about to topple over any moment,

You cry out seeing your horse in such pain, and run over to them,

Tears stream down your cheeks a bit and you quickly pull your horse into a tight hug, letting go quickly only because you know that you have to keep him walking.

Jungkook looks awful.  

It looks like he may have been crying, but you are unsure.  There are deep purple bruises underneath his eyes from staying up with Apollo and lack of sleep.  

“Thank you,” you say to him as you walk beside them, and he nods, “Of course I’d call you, I’d freak out if it was my horse,”

You two end up taking turns walking Apollo up and down the length of the stable until the vet finally shows up.

They make a quick diagnosis, saying that Apollo only has a very very mild case of colic, that after only one dose of antibiotics he should be good as new within an hour or so, that he should be fine and doesn’t necessarily need to be put on any kind of rest, though he does suggest at least one day of no work.

You are so relieved, and after walking Apollo around for another hour and a half he seems like he is back to his normal self, so you put him back into his stall.

Jungkook suggests that he puts a baby monitor in his stall just in case, so that he can hear if he starts showing any more symptoms again like rolling around or pawing the ground.

You agree that it is a good idea, but you still can’t pull yourself away to go back home, you are just too worried about Apollo, even though exhaustion is evident in your face.

Jungkook gulps loudly, scratching his head, “Um, you know, I have a room upstairs to sleep in,” and you graciously accept, following him up the slim staircase in the tack room to the second level and into his little room.

In his room there is a twin sized bed pushed up against the far wall, covered in layers of blankets, a small wardrobe and a large chair.  He doesn’t even have furniture like an end table, the lamp and alarm clock are on the floor next to the bed.

“You live here?” You ask him, and he tells you, “no, not really, only on some nights or when I have a night shift, someone is always here watching the horses, but we still need rest.  Sometimes I stay here even when I’m not on though cause the walls are thin, and I like hearing the sounds of the horses, it helps me sleep”

he looks away for the last bit, and you have your suspicions that he is blushing.

Then came a whole other matter,

“um, there’s only one bed...”

“Oh, yeah sorry, you take the bed, I’ll just sleep on the chair.” He says, and you don’t really listen, after he said that you could have the bed you kick off your uggs, crawling under the covers in a sleepy haze, that is until you see him sitting in the chair,

it’s ridiculous really, the chair is not a proper sleeping place, made only for putting on shoes in the morning and taking them off in the evening.

and you can’t stop yourself from saying what you do because the words already leave your mouth before you register what they are, “You know, I don’t mind sharing the bed,”

*face palm*

Jungkook looks up for a moment, “Are you sure, I don’t want you feeling uncomfortable or anything.”  and you sigh, “Kookie all we are doing is sleeping right?  What’s the harm if it’s on the same bed?”

You probably shouldn’t have said that last part, but you see him nod and take off his Timbs, sliding in under the covers with you.

It is too small of a space not to have any kind of contact with each other, and when he’s under the covers with you Jungkook pulls you into his chest.

and it is in that moment that you finally realize... THAT YOU HAVE NOT BEEN WEARING A FREAKING BRA THE ENTIRE NIGHT!  You rushed out of the house without putting one on.

Not that he could have noticed when you were downstairs walking Apollo because of your thick sweatshirt, but now with you pressed all up against his chest he is doomed to notice.

(*cough cough* he does notice, but doesn’t mention it afraid to make you embarrassed.  But he does smile and tries to enjoy it as long as he can because he isn’t sure when it is going to end or if it will ever happen again)

... so you try to stay still, and just fall asleep as soon as possible.

With your head on him you fall asleep to him smelling of salt, the comforting scent of sweet hay and horses, along with something a little minty.

The next morning you wake up, and it is hard to keep it being anything but awkward, so you try to thank him as quickly as possible and get out of there.  

Apollo was fine, and you were able to continue your training the next day, you were so thankful that nothing bad had really happened to your horse.

In the next few days you and Jungkook rarely speak to each other, not that you are mad, just that you don’t know what to say,

and now Taehyung finally takes a notice of you two acting so weird.

“So, what’s going on Y/N?” He asks while you are brushing Apollo down after a long ride, you talk a little bit and then he finally asks you what’s on his mind, “Is something going on between you and Jungkook?  Because you two have been acting strange.”

You try assuring him that nothing is going on, and he seems a little suspicious at least, but doesn’t pry.

And then Taehyung does something that surprises you a little bit, he acts like he is about to leave and instead leans into your ear whispering, “If you really like Kookie, do something special for him.  Teach him how to ride.”

Taehyung leaves right after that and you are left frozen.  Were you that easy to read? and Jungkook doesn’t know how to ride?

You ask Jungkook about it the next time you see him, “Do you perhaps want to ride Apollo?”

And he is taken aback, so surprised by your offer, but he doesn’t refuse, you two warming back up to each other, and agree on when he gets to ride.

After you leave Jungkook gets so excited that he starts to act like a little kid again, running around, dancing.  After all it is something that he has been wanting to do since he was in fact a child.

You start teaching him the basics off the horse, showing him the proper way to sit in a saddle and the posture you need to keep.

Jungkook was a fast learner and within a few hours you were confident that he could sit up in an actual saddle.

For the next few weeks your life only seems to be happening at the stable, you hastily preparing for a big eventing show, and you also teaching Jungkook how to ride.

To be completely frank, you had expected Jungkook to look very calm and collected in the saddle, since he is very confident in his movements and things on the ground, but

Jungkook is so awkward up on top of a horse, like he is learning everything and knows how to do it, but not matter how hard he tries he can’t look graceful,

like when he posts during the trot he looks like he is about to fall out of the saddle, and it always makes you laugh.

It’s cute, Jungkook gives Apollo a peppermint after he rides him.

As the time for your show gets closer and closer, you start getting more and more nervous because it is really important and if you do well you could potentially be put on this really exclusive riding team, that travels the world and stuff, and it’s basically your dream to be on that team.

Jungkook notices this and tries his best to encourage you so that you don’t give up on yourself when you can’t stop knocking down a certain pole when you come at the jump from a certain angle, and you feel like crying because of all the stress and ahhhhh

Once you get so worked up that you dismount and just sit in the dirt for a while, not angry crying but crying a really frustrated cry.

And Jungkook sees this, so he makes his way over and sits down with you,

He takes a hold of your hand in both of his and slowly starts rubbing his thumbs in circles to comfort you.

he doesn’t say anything because he is afraid that if he does he’ll say the wrong thing and make it worse for you, so he just keeps massaging from your wrist to your fingers.

You lean in his shoulder and doze a little, you stop crying.  From that moment on Jungkook and you are significantly more touchy with each other,

like you’re not dating (yet), but he’ll hold your hand when you walk Apollo to the pastures or make excuses to groom with you.

And though you don’t ever talk about this new sudden intimacy, it really helps start to relieve all the stress you have built up preparing for the show.

It is three days before the show that you finally start to make the trip to the event location...

Tae even helps you pack up all of your supplies into your trunk since Jungkook is still working with one of the other horses, and when you are finally done with the trunk and getting the trailer ready,

you meet up with Jungkook to discuss how you were going to get Apollo into the trailer,,, you ended up lucky and Apollo was somehow distracted or tired enough to not put up a fight when entering the trailer.

the trip to the event location is over 5 hours, and even though you are with Jungkook, you end up falling asleep in the passenger seat sometime along the way...

... you wake up to Jungkook, singing softly to whatever music is on the radio, and you are in awe,

his voice is too much, so beautiful.  

Like he was already perfect to begin with but now... just why?!

One day in the future you will learn that one of Kook’s first dreams was to be an idol, but turned down the opportunities to stay and take care of his family.

You arrive at the show, check in, and settle Apollo into the makeshift stable that they set up for all the horses to stay in for the three days while the show is taking place,

You and Jungkook had plans on staying in a small hotel a short walk from the show site, but since the room was definitely priced higher than expected, you guys opted to spend one night sleeping in the trailer.

Sleeping in the trailer was something that many people did often, in fact some of the other riders probably decided to just sleep in their trailers all along, after all with all the hay it can be rather comfortable.

After setting all of your equipment up for the next few days, you and Kook split up for a little bit, you wanted to walk around the grounds and get a feel of the competition, while Jungkook and some of the other stable hands from other stables were going to go play around in the parking lot or whatever,

it wasn’t that long after dinner time that you got a text from Jungkook, he and some of the other grooms and stable hands he befriended were going out to get drinks in town, 

He invited you along too of course, but you politely declined knowing that you needed to stay bright minded for tomorrow.  

It is already dark by the time that you get back to the trailer, and you can tell by the way that the clouds are coming in that it is about to rain.

You could start to hear the droplets hit the metal exterior of the trailer, as you snuggled into your makeshift sleeping bag (just a bunch of blankets that you keep in the trailer in case of emergency), and you hope that Jungkook will be back soon so that he doesn’t get caught in the pouring rain.

He arrives sometime later, clearly a little drunk and definitely caught in the downpour.

Jungkook’s shoulders are wet, and he throws off his baseball cap and jacket somewhere into the corner.

“Are you still awake?” he says playfully, definitely not sober, “Y/N you asleep already?”

You turn to face him better in the piles of blankets, and give him a sleepy wave, “Had fun?  You going to remember any of this tomorrow?  It’s going to be a little hard to call in a sick day,”

He chuckles, a little bit too hard, “My clothes are wet.” he raises his arms up like a child, “I’m going to catch a cold,”

“That sounds like a YOU problem Kookie,” you tell him, and he smiles a lopsided-drunk smile.

But then he just starts stripping in front of you, like with no regard of your presence in the room.

“Kookie-ah!” you shout, covering your eyes with the blanket,

“Calm down,” he says, “didn’t we and Tae go swimming in the lake by the CL sometime?  What’s the difference now?”

“FOR YOUR INFORMATION JUNGKOOK THE DIFFERENCE NOW IS THAT WE ARE NOT SWIMMING.”

“But I am wet,,,” He winks, and you glare.  What?

He finished dressing into a pair of sweatpants and a white undershirt and climbs under the covers, coming much closer to you that you would have thought considering the room you two have.

“Y/N?” 

His voice is soft and gentle, you can hear the rain still falling around the trailer, and droplets are in his hair.

“What is it Kookie?”

“I think you look... pretty when you’re flustered.”

Gone.  You are gone, out of this trailer and on cloud nine; Jungkook thinks you’re pretty, even when he is drunk, he thinks you’re pretty.

He is quiet for a moment, and you think that he might have fallen asleep, but then you turn to look at him and see him leaning up at you,

“Y/N?”

“What is it Kookie?”

“I kind of think, that I maybe,... that I maybe maybe like you.” *chokes* “And right now I kind of think that I, no I know that I definitely want to kiss you, right now, right here,” *chokes harder* “but I’m not going to.”

You sigh, “That’s probably for the best, you are kinda, not kinda more like actually drunk right now,” 

“For your information I am just as sound of mind now as I am normally.  But yes, that’s one reason.”

“What’s the other?” you whisper.

“I don’t know if I could stop.  I’ve wanted to kiss you for so long.” He sighs, gathers up a bunch of blanket and cuddles into it.  

“You should in the morning.” you tell him.

“I plan on it.” And with that you hear his breaths get heavier, sleep overcame his body, and with that you allow yourself to do so as well.

In the morning, to your displeasure, Jungkook is nowhere to be seen.  It was your biggest fear, he confessed and regrets it, maybe he never even had those feelings towards you in the first place.

You get ready, putting on your best show attire, knowing that you are being judged on your presentation as well.

Later you find Jungkook in with Apollo, braiding his mane in the classic dressage buns.

“Hey you!” His attitude surprises you, you expected him to stay away, is he really going to act like nothing happened?!?

“I thought I’d wake up a little earlier and get him ready for you, now I know how you like to do this yourself, but I thought that it’s a special day, don’t want you getting any doubts while you get ready.” you nod at him, and start helping braiding Apollo’s tail.

The day continues like this until your class is finally called and you are outside waiting till your turn to go into the ring.  You had already warmed up Apollo in a smaller ring a little while ago.

Jungkook stands with you as you watch the other riders go do their trip.

“Don’t get nervous Y/N,” he assures you constantly, “you’ve trained harder than almost everyone here.” He grabs your hand in his to start massaging the circles like he usually does, and you snap.

How dare he act like this after what happened last night!

You tell him just that. 

“You confessed to me last night, you can take back what you said, I know you were drunk maybe it wasn’t really like that, but don’t ignore it.  Please, I’m begging you, it’s not fair.” you feel like you are about to cry, but no tears come.

May rider 32 please prepare to enter the ring.

That’s you.  You turn away from Jungkook in order to mount, but he grabs your wrist.

“Y/N, of course I meant it.  I planned on kissing you after I saw you win, but I guess you are just too stubborn for that,”

He does it.  He kisses you.  Right then and there and in front of all those people.  No one seemed to care, but to you, you feel like you’re levitating off of the ground.  How can one kiss feel so right?

“Now go,” he tells you, and you mount up, ready to go into the show ring.  You smile a smile too big for your face as you enter.

<><> do not edit/remove anything from the original post <><> this AU belongs to me <><>