#think Tulio and Miguel levels of bullshittery

[quillfeather21]

Mha AU Idea

Anastasia, but make it MHA Fantasy AU

Okay, before you all delete me, consider this-

The Fantasy AU Bakugou’s home is invaded when he’s very young. Kirishima, a couple of years older and works in the castle kitchen, helps him and Inko, the duchess, escape. Inko loses Bakugou in the chaos, and Bakugou is left alone at the coach station.

Years pass, and Bakugou is kicked out of the orphanage he found himself in. Still a sarcastic asshole, he walks, hoping to find work, until he finds himself at the abandoned castle he once lived in. Since he’s a curious little shit, he wanders around, finding the keepsakes he once adored. He picks up a vase and exclaims that “its fucking chipped! It’s damn worthless now!” (Little did he know he had chipped it as a child, playing with Izuku)

But it all feels too familiar. Too close to him to be coincidental. Sings “Once Upon a December”, remembering how soft his Auntie had been, and how much he misses her.

Meanwhile, Kirishima, now an adult with his accomplice Shoto- sneak in to steal some stuff from the castle. Turns out, Inko is still alive! And she’s looking for her adoptive nephew in a city far from where they currently are. She believes he’s still alive, yet Kirishima and Shoto are unsure IF Bakugou is still alive. So they’re stealing stuff to try and find a keepsake that would convince Inko that some random person is Bakugou.

So they find Bakugou in the castle, staring at a painting of him and his parents trying to figure out why the fuck he looks so much like these people. He’s never seen them before.

Shoto and Kirishima find him, and they scream. Bakugou yells, scared out of his pants about suddenly being seen because he thought he was ALONE DAMN IT!

Shoto, stopping his screaming: Wait- that’s a painting of the lost prince! This guy looks EXACTLY like him! We wouldn’t even have to get a wig!!

Kirishima: no. Hell no. We are not using this blond twink to get money.

Bakugou: I AIN’T NO TWINK ASSHOLE- (offended Bakugou noises)

So, Bakugou is convinced that he’d get some answers if he joins Shoto and Kirishima on their little scam way. They travel…

Enter on stage left Shigaraki. He’s WHOLLY pissed that the blond brat he tried to kill ended up ALIVE, and so he sends the league to hunt Bakugou down. Because why… he holds a grudge for not being able to take the throne. Dabi is just in it for the money, Toga likes to stab people, and Twice… no one is sure why Twice is with the villains.

Meanwhile, Shoto is having the time of his LIFE watching KiriBaku happen before his eyes. Kirishima is SO ANNOYED by this blond asshole, and Bakugou LOVES to annoy him. Shoto keeps tallies of who wins the arguments (so far Bakugou wins most of them).

Shoto also tells Bakugou Kiri’s story, because Bakugou wants to know what’s his deal.

“Kirishima is a good friend, but he carries sadness. He never got to find out what happened to the prince. It haunts him, I think. That he feels responsible.”

“That’s bullshit! He saved the prince! If I was the prince, I’d be thanking him! He’s the reason the duchess is alive, that the prince might be alive!”

Shoto: *knowing smile*

They get to the city with little trouble, minus Dabi trying to lure Bakugou in to BURN him. Toga tried to, but she was too girly so Bakugou said “naw fam.”

They meet Izuku, the son of the duchess. He chastised them for trying to trick his mother, but he takes one look at Bakugou and goes “Hmm, very convincing. You answer my questions, then you meet the duchess.”

Shoto and Kirishima had DRILLED the questions into Bakugou. He knew the answers. Until the last one.

“How did you escape?”

Kirishima PALES. HE KNOWS how they escaped, but he never told a soul. Bakugou answers flawlessly.

“There was a kitchen boy, he opened a door the servants used and we crawled out. I got separated from the duchess and I ended up in the orphanage. I stayed there until I got too old.”

Izuku knew the story, his mother had told him hundreds of times about the dark tunnel and the little servant boy’s smile as they had run across the castle grounds towards freedom. This boy’s story matched it detail for detail.

Izuku instantly starts crying. His cousin is home, why wouldn’t he be crying?

But Inko doesn’t want to see Bakugou. She’s tried of being tricked and fooled. She’s sure he’s a lovely boy but she doesn’t want to see him.

Shoto and Kirishima: BUT HES THE REAL DEAL!!

During all of this, Shigaraki’s fed up with his incompetent lackeys, and so he takes it upon himself to finish what he started (way to take responsibility, man). Shoto, Kiri, Izuku, and Bakugou all had gone to see a play and hopefully meet the duchess- who Kirishima was trying to convince to even LOOK at Bakugou.

Bakugou finds out Kirishima and Shoto lied to him. They weren’t his friends. They had just wanted to scam a innocent lady into thinking he was someone he supposedly WASN’T.

Bakugou bitch slaps Kirishima, who tries to apologize. Shoto tried to get everything under control, but he ends up hijacking a carriage with Kirishima to take Inko back to her place. Bakugou was already there, grabbing his belongings and hopefully hitting the road before anyone stopped him.

Inko walks in to see him staring at some drawings. A little boy holding a woman’s hand. She sighs, leaning against the table.

“Someone I loved gave me those, a long time ago. They tricked us both, didn’t they?”

Bakugou agrees, angry with Kirishima. He sniffs, before stopping.

“Peppermint?”

“Peppermint oil, for my hand. It helps the ache. I broke my wrist when I was younger, it never healed right.”

“I… we were in the parlor, you asked me to grab your peppermint oil. I- I spilled the entire fucking bottle! When you and Izuku would go away, I’d lay on that rug and wish you were back! Because it smelled like peppermint- like… like you!”

Inko is shocked. No one knew about the peppermint rug. Only her and Katsuki. It was their secret. She hugs Bakugou, who hugs her back and calls her auntie.

She smiles and opens a box. In it is a crown. She puts it on his head.

“As handsome as your father, and with your mother’s hell raising smile.”

Meanwhile as this fluff happens, Shigaraki is fucking shit up outside. Shoto and Izuku fighting Nomu side by side, Izuku kisses Shoto before turning around and DECAPITATING a Nomu with his sword.

“TAKE THAT!”

Shoto: oh god he could kill me in an instant. I’m in love.

Kirishima and Bakugou fuck up Shigaraki’s night the second Bakugou joins in.

Kirishima: *gets hit*

Bakugou: DON’T TOUCH HIM YOU CRUSTY FACED BASTARD!! (Swings at Shigaraki)

Shigaraki: why not? Do you love him or something?

Bakugou: YES! NOW DIE!

Kirishima: wait- you love me?

Bakugou: I DON’T KNOW I’M STILL MAD AT YOU!

They defeat Shigaraki and the Nomu, and Bakugou takes his place as the Dragon King.

Kirishima is happy as his King, Izuku and Shoto have a nice Dukedom going on (Izuku is a duke in the story as a son of a duchess), and Inko?

She’s just happy her family is whole again.