#this all sounds so trivial and those parts of it are but theres other shit i dont want to mention bc i Can't Think About It rn

[piplupod]

oh i think I'm going to throw myself into a ravine actually

[thegamingcatmom]

i enjoy your posts so much and i always want to send asks so…. your maggot mommy dry humps reader because she’s horny for her lil drama queen yes? or is it for another reason?

obviously nothing properly intimate has happened between your maggot mommy and reader yet so i want to know who you think would make the first proper move?

iirc theres not been a kiss yet? so like who do you think would kiss the other first? and who do you think would make a move to touch the other beneath their clothes first?

EEEEEEEEEEEE

THANK YOUUU BB 😭🥰

I enjoy receiving yall´s asks so much, lemme tell you. Seeing other ppl just as obsessed as I am and just fangirling makes me just-

Also, pls do send me all those asks because I´m needy af and I need yall to know it. 😩🤌

Aight so, that first question is very easy to answer because yes yes yes Momma is a horny lil shit and we love it. Ofc she´s got the hots for our certain someone and, if it was up to her (meaning: if someone wasn´t being so dramatic because of something as trivial as needing sleep, my goodness-), you bet your ass she´d be on them 24/7, without exception...except when it´s time for blood, guts and gore galore.

(Then again, I guess there´s no way for us to know what exactly Momma is up to whenever her darling Drama Queen is out of order. Hmm...)

But ofc there´s also the feral part to consider, the one that´s driven by instinct and urges and reacts to stimuli and that part of her is just as present, if not more, when it comes to hopping on and, yknow-

I´d say that´s also the main reason the clothes stay on (for now) and nothing real has happened yet because, as strange as it sounds (especially for someone like Momma), it doesn´t even occur to her that there´s another (and better) way to, yknow, hop on and get things done. She´s driven by this urge to catch and mark and conquer her ～mate～ and get that stench all over them as thoroughly as possible and she gets this tunnel vision and nothing else matters.

Which brings me to your next questions...

Momma does not know how to human, at all. That´s just a fact. And it´s not even that she wouldn´t enjoy if something were to happen - on the absolute contrary. It´s just that her feral, rotten brain genuinely doesn´t grasp the concept of it...yet.

You think horny!Deadite!Ellie is terrifying? Horny!Deadite!Ellie driven by actual sexual desire is a nightmare (and we might just gonna like it).

So, when we look at the facts now...who do you think would make the first move?

I know that doesn´t exactly answer your question but I´ve been thinking about that topic for a while now actually - how to best go about it considering, well, everything. I did have some ideas already but your ask made me rethink some things and well, let´s just say it´s probs not gonna go down the way yall expect it to, as per usual.

But it´s something I wanted to save for later because it´s defo an important moment that´s gonna set some things in motion and I wanna focus on other things first (meaning: more dry humping and utter batshittery) before that happens as I feel like once that line´s been crossed there´s just...no going back. A door has been closed, so to speak.

Thanks a lot for your ask! 🥰

[shriekingseas]

TW/ discussion of r@pe (nothing personal or explicit, just discussion of the nature of sexual violence and r@pe culture)

im really struggling to understand what makes r@pe so bad? not like, morally, but what about the actual act of r@pe makes it to much more traumatizing than other acts of assault or abuse? or is that just the product of r@pe culture, which considers sexual trauma a key element of one’s identity after the fact?

what about those specific body parts has the power to completely obliterate sense of self and ability to function? theres a whole generation system of opression built around rape- that plays a role. Purity culture has also pushed this idea that sex is a private, intimate, act-- and given that r@pe culture has so many people who’ve been raped questioning the line between r@pe and sex, that taboo of purity culture definitely exists. Theres also the element of trust considering most rapists are known entities to the people they rape-- thus there’s a breach of trust and sense of loss... but theres gotta be shit im missing. Perhaps that thing is the all encomassing nature of r@pe culture itself. 

Ex. If you beat the shit out of me unprompted in the street- you’re a piece of shit. If you rape me in the middle of the street- you’re still a piece of shit, but now my sense of self and life-trajectory is likely completely shifted. Why?

I feel like this sounds as though I am trying to gaslight or trivialize, im not saying that rape isnt as bad as we feel it to be, im just baffled by the impact it has in comparison to other acts of violence.... idk im writing an essay on this so we shall see where the research takes me. Any thoughts?

PERHAPS MOST IMPORTANTLY: Is this question even worth posing? Should we just say r@pe is one of the worst experiences a person can have and leave it at that? Who cares what makes it so? Does risk of leaving someone reading this and feeling less valid in their suffering afterwards outweigh the value of wondering why that suffering exists?

im running myself in circles with this one

----- also side note it feels so icky to censor r@pe, but it is unfortunately necessary to not get flagged rip

[grubhivemind]

RILEY: -while ryan falling  back into the web of addiction wasn't a good thing, she was grateful that she was given the chance to support her through this. she took advantage of every day's two hour long visiting period no matter what. the last she wanted was for ryan to feel like she was going through this alone- 

RILEY: -she gets clearance into the facility and knows by now not to bring much of anything--everything could be used as a weapon these days. and she walks into the common area, looking for her daughter-

RYAN: -she's got herself perched in an arm chair near a window, away from other small groups of visitors with patients. she seems to be zoning out a little, watching the happenings of the outside world, but she already looks like she's on the upswing in general, even with the pensive look on her face.- 

RYAN: -when riley enters, she catches a glimpse of the movement and perks to attention. a smile returns to her weary face, brightening her look immensely and she waves in case riley hasn't spotted her yet.-

RILEY: -her attention is grabbed by the waving and she greets her youngest with a warm grin- hey, baby.

RYAN: -hops up from her seat to capture riley in a hug. she really appreciates her visits... the loneliness really worsens the restlessness.- hey!!! i missed you.

RYAN: its only been a day but i missed you!!!

RILEY: -hugs her tightly and smooches her head- i missed you too, cutie. 

RILEY: how are you doing?

RYAN: im alright... just a little bored i guess. -sighs-

RYAN: i mean aside from all the gross withdrawal shit but hey. 

RYAN: its not as bad as it could be???

RILEY: -she pulls away to take a seat next to ryan's chair- you really feeling that optimistic despite all of this? i mean...you totally should. because it's gonna get better. i just know how hard it is to.

RYAN: -wringes her hands and then takes a seat again too.- yeah. i dunno. 

RYAN: last time i was in a place like this it wasnt really... my decision?

RYAN: guess its easier to be optimistic if you sorta feel in control.

RILEY: -nods- yeah. i totally agree. 

RILEY: it took a lot of maturity, you know. for you to put yourself first and come here. 

RILEY: i wouldn't have been able to do that at your age at all.

RYAN: ... -she just shrugs about that- just took advantage of a moment of clarity. 

RYAN: i had some motivation but... 

RYAN: i think mostly i was disappointed in myself? and i was tired of feeling bad about that. 

RYAN: time to put on me big girl panties i guess.

RILEY: -she smiles a little, listening to ryan talk- and you're pretty fucking amazing for it.

RILEY: but you've always been amazing.

RYAN: -she blush... she isn't sure how to receive a compliment like that. at least not in THIS context. she doesn't feel all that amazing. its just necessary.- aw gee. 

RYAN: youre just saying that. :blush: -still gonna act coy about it tho.-

RILEY: -ruffles her a hair a little- nah. 

RILEY: i'm real proud of you, kid. 

RILEY: just happy i get to hang around you this time around. 

RILEY: you know, impart my motherly wisdom or some shit like that.

RYAN: oh?? what nuggets of wisdom do you have to share with me today?

RILEY: fuck bitches get money.

RYAN: -snorts then pops and locks it- no no no no silly boys cant tame me. 

RYAN: bennys the only one whos ever gonna claim me. 

RYAN: uh uh uh uh im in love with the price tag. 

RYAN: gimmie your number imma give that shit right back. 

RYAN: fuck boyz get money. 

RYAN: fuck boyz get money.

RILEY: i like that better. 

RILEY: okay, but for real, i never got any motherly wisdom to impart in the first place. it's all just winging it.

RYAN: hehe... i figured thats how the parenting thing works. 

RYAN: i mean no offense.

RYAN: youre good at winging it.

RILEY: yeah? 

RILEY: good enough to get a g on my report card?

RYAN: more like straight up g.

RILEY: daaaaaaaaaaamn! 

RILEY: didn't see that one coming. 

RILEY: so have you made any friends here yet? 

RILEY: places like these are friend central.

RYAN: i mean... im friends with pretty much everyone. -looks around at all the folks visiting with their family and friends.- 

RYAN: im of moderate popularity. people either love me or hate me cuz im being so bitterly optimistic haha. 

RYAN: so you know. 

RYAN: love me or hate me its still an obsession.

RILEY: love me or hate me that is the question. 

RILEY: you've always been the light that draws all the moths and big bugs. 

RILEY: it sounds less like a compliment when i say it like that but i swear it is.

RYAN: -snorts- oh yeah... i attract all KINDS of creepy crawlies.

RILEY: where's the lie?

RYAN: -snickers, but then pauses thoughtfully.- hey... 

RYAN: im sure theres some wisdom you can share though? advice on how to like... 

RYAN: keep myself from feeling so  restless?

RILEY: -looks over at her as her expression softens a little- you can't. 

RILEY: it's a fun part of withdrawal, baby. 

RILEY: what you can do is try and distract yourself. or make sure you're never completely alone. cuz it's when you're alone that it gets unbearable.

RYAN: ... -looks down at her lap.-distractions are hard.

RILEY: they are. 

RILEY: or you can channel that energy into something artistic. 

RILEY: it's not going to take it away but at least you'll get something out of it, you know?

RYAN: -fidgets, but then nods.- i always try singing. 

RYAN: it usually helps a lil bit.

RILEY: keep singing. even if you don't want to anymore. 

RILEY: that's my advice.

RYAN: -some days it is harder to find her voice and it feels like those have been more often than not lately.- you wanna sing with me?

RILEY: -she smiles sweetly at her- there's no question about it. 

RILEY: i'd fuckin love to.

RYAN: -nods again, taking a deep breath.- alright cool. 

RYAN: -shuts her eyes, thinking of what she wants to sing... and then just lets it happen.- 

RYAN: when it went down it was hard to breathe. 

RYAN: i gave up everything in a slow fall down to the floor. RYAN: life was escaping me. i couldnt find myself. 

RYAN: til it was all lost. 

RYAN: not anymore. 

RYAN: im holding on to all the pieces of my hearts debris. 

RYAN: til its time. 

RYAN: ill put it together and fix myself eventually. 

RYAN: and know its mine.

RILEY: i found gold in the wreckage, put it on a necklace. 

RILEY: keepin' it cause i, i, i, i know that it's mine. 

RILEY: i wear it like a message so i don't forget it. 

RILEY: keepin' it cause i, i, i, i know that it's mine.

RILEY: i know that it's mine no matter what i do. -reaches over to push ryan's hair back- 

RILEY: i know that it's mine whether i win or lose. 

RILEY: and even though my heart needs to take its time. 

RILEY: i know that's mine, i know that it's mine.

RYAN: -chest tightens at the simple gesture.- facing the change but its still tough to see. 

RYAN: at first i fought it all. i was so mean. 

RYAN: im still unsure how its supposed to be. 

RYAN: but taking every day now by the skin of my teeth.

RYAN: until i learn. 

RYAN: im holding on to all the pieces of my hearts debris. 

RYAN: til its time. oh. 

RYAN: ill pull it together and fix myself eventually. 

RYAN: and know its mine. -she starts to sniffle, watching her mother sing with her.-

RILEY: i found gold in the wreckage, put it on a necklace. 

RILEY: keepin' it 'cause i, i, i, i know that it's mine. 

RILEY: i wear it like a message so i don't forget it. 

RILEY: keepin' it 'cause i, i, i, i know that it's mine. -takes the opportunity to bring Ryan against her, holding her and singing more softly.- 

RILEY: know that it's mine no matter what I do. 

RILEY: i know that it's mine whether I win or lose. 

RILEY: and even though my heart needs to take its time. 

RILEY: i know that it's mine, i know that it's mine.

RYAN: -curls up against her, clinging tightly and giving up on singing the rest of the song because she's trembling too badly now.-

RILEY: -just holds her safely in her arms and leans her head against her daughter's.. she's still singing, just very softly-

RYAN: -she just listens to her for a long while, letting the tears that escape from her to cleanse the heaviness in her heart. she feels like a kid again, crying over something trivial that her mother effortlessly cast away with her soothing songs. it reminds her of all the ways she wanted to be just like riley. maybe she got that wish in too many different ways, but she wouldn't change this connection they have now for anything. she feels safe just like this.-