this isnt as long as before but i just cannot stop thinking about this, why i dislike story and lore boils down to these main point
--the ending feels unsatisfying as hell
even if i ignore everything i dont like about how the game treated zelda and ganondorf, the ending itself just feels, despite being presented as super epic an touching, incredibly empty to me and part of it is that it feels like an unearned return to status quo
of course i didnt think zelda would stay a dragon and i actually wanted to help her, which is why i kept trying to hunt down impa since she said shes gonna search for a way for us to help zelda, bc i wanted to!! i was eager to help her!
i fully hoped and kinda expected that thered either be some kind of dragon dungeon (think, the water dragon from okami) tho that would be difficult since you can get items from her so i ended up thinking before going into the end thered be a mission with impa (or at least given to you from her) where she found answers in ancient scripts (that she told you she would look through) and that you need to find a special lil thing that will help zelda undragonfy, like some sort of ultra secret forbidden enigma stone able to reverse dragon transformations kinda deal (golden opportunity to make you go and talk to the yiga bc they might know or even own some ancient texts) that youd keep in your inventory until the very end and after you kill dragondorf (pretty mortal for becoming an immortal dragon huh) you take it out and use it, undragonfying zelda and ending in a similar epic falling and paralel to the beginning way
... and instead impa stays in the house and only has a few repeating dialog boxes and does nothing and you cant do anything bc in the end you just get randomly teleported (and stripped of your clothing AGAIN) into some weird ethereal plane somehow?? with the ghost of long ass dead sonia and apparently not as gone as i thought rauru (seriously i felt sad when he went poof at the end of the tutorial but i guess i shouldnt have) awkwardly blasting dragon zelda with some magic tm and its all reversed no problem (heck me for caring i guess) turns out helping her was killing an evil guy we never really knew and mineru just kinda says lol its bc time and light magic i guess lol as an explanation
like i really wanted to go and help zelda! i was motivated to do it and spent HOURS trying to find impa again but i wasnt allowed to do anything bc zelda gets saved by some deus ex machina bs in the end anyway, what a fool i was, of course killing the evil guy is the solution to everything >:(
(and no i dont care if its meant as in uwu sonia and rauru wanted to help one last time uwu bc it doesnt change how unsatisfying it was to watch it all just kinda happen)
--point two is just how much totk feels like its trying to REPLACE botw instead of being a sequel, its not building on anything of it its ripping out the fundation and building its own thing in its place, like i was so excited to see what happened to the titans, and all the sheikah tech what they mabe had done in all that time now that theres a tech enthusiastic girl as the head of the monarchy, maybe even find out more about them
and instead its just all ... gone with not explanation? theres isnt even a LAME explanation, its just gone?? you never find out what the ancient energy actually was, and why there were concentrations of it in the regions with the ancient furnace (well heck it didnt even have anything to do with ganondorf actualyl bc that would have been too interesting) bc that was so intrigueing?? like yeah where DID it come from and why is it there ?? and oh suddendly hey look theres an even MORE ancient and even MORE advanced civilization thats way COOLER and BETTER than the ancient sheikah now, they also built stuff everywhere and have been here ALL ALONG cant you see its everywhere!! and its the only thing everyone cares about all of the sudden, all evdidence of the ancient sheikah tech was scraped of the earth so there literally only being some guardian parts on top of the hateno lab feels like an oversight now bc everything lese was to thourohgly wiped of the map-
for no reason even?? like im totalls fine with it being useless and not working anymore but .... why remove it like it was wiped from history?? and then they have the gall to mention the happenings of botw like, twice in the entire game but still just give you the most basic summary of it mentioned on a sidenote with again not even a hint what happened to all of it
wouldnt there have been the golden opportunity to use it to access the new parts and map points that changed?? like a shrine thats fallen into the underground, an access to caves and the underground in the broken and collapsed elevator tube of a sheikah srhine?? maybe even a broken interior of an old shrine, like the room you get put into with the puzzle and where the monk once were broken and half overgrown in the udnerground? some left over construction site where you can see oh thats how the ancient sheikah got all that tech underground, bc they all had access to it and built it there to then rise up when its needed? maybe even making use of the old sonau sites since they frequnetly built their srhines within those ruins?? that the ancient sheikah found em and put the ruins to use? to research it and built their own stuff from it? it wouldnt have to have any focus, literally just part of the enviroment even
really everything totk does is like -forget botw ever happend, look how much cooler and better i am, who cares about sheikah stuff sonau are the new cool guys that came out of nowhere but now apparently have been everywhere all along actually-
i LOVE botw and with it feeling much more like its attempting to replace botw instead of building its story and world further every reference to botw i found felt like a slap in the face instead, oh look where the shrine of life used to be isnt even a hint left of sheikah tech somehow, and also right under it is the lake of healing filled with sonau structure bc ACTUALLY they were here FIRST bc they are so cool omg you guys
dare i say it feel a little like they wanted to make an entirely different version of botw basically, but wanted to reuse the map and models so they just said yeah uhhhh its totally a sequel yeah yeha that makes sense, its not erasing botw and doing essentiall the same thing again but bigger cooler and better (tm) its just uuh a ...sequel ye.
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Medics are messy.
Or, well, the medics themselves probably shouldn't be too messy, considering they are sometimes the only thing standing between a gruesome wound and Thanatos himself. Although medics probably shouldn't perform surgery while wearing flip flops, either, so maybe that's not saying too much.
But regardless of appropriate footwear (or lack thereof), the profession itself is messy. Blood. Muscles. Organs. Bones. You name it - Will has seen and touched it all.
He can vaguely remember being a bit grossed out, in the beginning. He supposes that would be the natural human reaction when confronted with gore. Especially of the real variety. He's grown out of it, though. Plus the perks that come with his position are nothing to sneeze at.
Nico teases him for not liking horror movies, but the truth is that to Will they are just incredibly mind-numbingly boring. It doesn't matter how realistic the wounds or special effects look - hell, they could cut open a real human being and the injury still wouldn't faze him, no matter how gruesome. Because for Will, the worst part isn't the visual. That one he got used to pretty quickly, considering. It's everything else. It's the smell, putrid and overwhelming and always so horribly nauseating he swears he can taste it. It's the sound, failing organs frantically trying to fulfill their purpose in a desperate cacophany the movies can never get quite right (if they even remember to try.) It's the revolting knowledge that what you are feeling does not belong outside of a body, that it shouldn't be able to be felt like that.
They watch a bunch of horror movies anyway, because Nico knows how to press his buttons and manages to bait him into it every single fucking time.
("Please", Nico had whined in a tone he'd never dare use outside of his cabin. Maybe Will's shamelessness is contagious. Or maybe Nico knows that, without witnesses, nobody will ever believe him. "It's for the aesthetic".
Will had felt his lips contorting into a smile, even as he'd tried to keep on his mask of fake indignation. 'Aesthetic' is one of Nico's favorite words, along with 'vibe' and 'rancid'. Will kind of loves that he knows that. Nico can be as cool and badass as he wants, doesn't change the fact that he's an absolute dork as well.
"Come on, you know you're gonna give in anyways" And then, because the little shit knows what he is doing, he'd winked. And, well. Will is not too proud to admit that he is an absolute sucker for brown eyes. Especially these ones.)
He should probably be embarrassed about how easy he is, to be honest. But things like shame or propriety or even self-respect kind of go down the drain when you are perpetually exhausted and have seen basically the entirety of Camp in various states of undress. He used to think that that was the reason naked bodies didn't seem to have the same effect on him as on other people, but then the Michael-thing-that-shan't-be-mentioned happened and. Well. Let's just say Will is very aware that being a medic and having an active sex life are not mutually exclusive. Their father's slutty tendencies have been inherited by quite a lot of his half-siblings, as it turns out.
Besides, even if the movie itself is boring, Nico's reactions are hilarious. The jumpscares always get him, even if the fucker tries to deny it. And when a movie manages to really grip him, Nico will make sure to keep Will just slightly behind him. Will isn't sure whether that is a voluntary action or just instinct, but it always makes him swoon all the same. Nico is probably aware of it, freakishly observant as he is, but he never mentions it, so neither does Will. Gods forbid Nico stop doing it - that boy is jumpy even outside of shitty movies.
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yeah it's 2 am DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT
the thing about pandora hearts is. IS. that it truly revolutionized the way i view storytelling when i was a teenager and also probably forever. anytime i am too afraid to try something new, i just look back over my shoulder and think of what this series was capable of over the course of its publication!! like holy shit i didn't even pick it up until years into its run (about 2010) but IT DID SO MUCH
the thing is!!! this is a story that did not pull its punches it DID NOT dull its teeth, it only got darker and more brutal as time went on and as the curtains were pulled back on the narrative. and what else could it do? we're led through the narrative by oz, who is trying to understand the significance of what happened to him (getting thrown into the abyss for ten years for the sin of existing????). he is having to pull on countless strings that are purposefully obscuring the truth from him, and most everyone around him. of course it's gonna end up being a NIGHTMARE.
BUT. BUT.
this is a tragedy, about war and the struggle of dying regimes in an insane fantasy landscape, about power and madness and the price of hubris (and also alice in wonderland?). and it's also a story about love, about reclaiming yourself when everything from fate to those who you should've been able to trust try to take your personhood and claim it for their own. it's about the shit you're never going to forgive yourself for, how grief can mangle and destroy your heart if you let it. it's about the shit you HAVE to forgive yourself for or you're never going to get any better.
it's about love. about choosing who you love, and them choosing you back, even at your worst and especially at your worst. (love as a savior, love as damnation, love as a purgatorial fear.) love and hope are both bloody-knuckled in this series, and it's so well-earned the whole way through the despair.
(and i don't even really mean it in the romantic sense, but it can also be that way! definitely!! but i mean it in every sense, every kind. holy shit.)
also yes speaking as the guy who was strongly influenced to change their name bc of this series (dw about it), it also feels in retrospect like this insane set of queer allegories. maybe i'm biased (i definitely am). but i get it, i still get it and i probably get it even better now!
anyway uh. lol you should read it sometime, it kinda slaps
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