#this is so funny HELP

[alexturntable]

what do you mean you pushed ALL THE BUTTONS

[moralesluvr]

imagine sitting down at a restaurant with miguel & the couple that’s seated in the booth a few spaces away from y’all starts arguing and you both can hear what they’re saying…and it’s all stuff that shouldn’t be said out loud. n y’all r just sitting there trying not to laugh 😭😭😭

nah because i KNOW miguel is so goofy like this.

you were seated in a diner together for breakfast, finally enjoying your day off together as you both picked the menu apart, when you heard bickering.

not just normal arguing, literal bickering from the other side of the old-timey restaurant. miguel completely turned around to eavesdrop, and you slapped his hand, “babe! that’s none of our business, you’re making it obvious that you’re listening!”

he didn’t say anything, he just shushed you and motioned for you to come sit by him. you rolled your eyes, but you couldn’t even pretend you weren’t interested too, so you snuck out of your side of the booth and sat on his lap as you eavesdropped on the two women who were talking a little too loud.

“how dare you invite me here, acting like you haven’t been having sex with my husband for months!”

the other woman snorted, “oh please, elizabeth, your husband had been cheating for a long, long time and you never knew! ask the other girls back at the country club, where do you think he goes every weekend? to the lake house like he says? baby, he sold that lake house and blew it on call girls.”

“you’re lying! at least me and my husband don’t have to wear protection because one of you has an STD!”

miguel immediately craned his neck over to you, whispering, “the hell?”

you contained a laugh as the women just kept going, until one of them stood up, a fork positioned in her hand like she was going to hurt the other woman with it. “i’ll kill you!”

“oh hell no.” you snorted, grabbing your husband’s hand as you started to stand up,

“we’re leaving.”

[occidentaltourist]

Kate Winslet and Cate Blanchett talking about she-wees with Dua Lipa and Adrian Lester. [x]

I’m wheezing

[confettieparfait]

OH MY GOD ???

[thiagodasilva]

he’s just like the girls fr

[fr-likes-chocolate]

So after Phil talking about a lion king Au for QSMP, I had a vision

[goodpokeaniscreencaps]

[higgsbison]

Obnoxiously verbose my immortal you say ….. “Hi my name is Havelock Dogbotherer Dementia Raven Vetinari and I have long ebony black hair (that's how I got my name) with purple streaks like Madams dress and red tips that reaches my neck and icy blue eyes like limpid tears and nobody tells me I look like my aunt (AN: if u don't know who she is thank gods I have enough problems as it is) I'm not related to Leonard da quirm but I wish I was because he's a major fucking intellectual. I'm not a vampire but the way these idiots are carrying on I might be ones dinner by the end of this trip .I have pale white skin. I'm also an Assassin and I used to be “educated” in the Assassins Guild in Ankh Morpork where I just graduated (im nineteen) I'm a jaded revolutionary (in case you couldn't tell) and I wear mostly black. I love Harga Topic and I buy all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a black shirt with matching daggers and a black coat , black socks and black shoes ,I was wearing black gloves , black underpants (yes I changed them stop asking Aunty!) black trousers and a black mood . I was stuck in a coach with Downey and Cruces and Ludorum . It was snowing and raining and werewolfing but there was no Rust which I was very happy about. A lot of Scags stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them.”

ANON WHERE DID YOU GET MY FIRST DRAFT FROM, FESS UP

[beanghostprincess]

Usopp friendship with Mihawk had to be the funniest thing added in the OPLA, year 1 of Kuragaina goth rooming nightmare and the three of them end up bonding over Ussop of all ppl. Because Shanks shows up on a "bother Mihawk" whim and they all subconsciously decide to bully Yassop about his shitty parenting choices. Perona escorts them to the main house ranting a mile a minute about Ussop this Ussop that and how he is immune to her fruit and what that means and how that means that obviously Ussop suffers from daddy issues(only issues Ussop isn't suffering from but Yassop doesn't know that) and Yassop is already squirming but then Zoro is there. He is looming in a corner, menacingly (as much as he can anyway, he is scrawny and more bruised than an overripe apple at the bottom of the barrel) and he just gives them a flat look, murmurs smth vaguely rude about them being the deadbeat pirates(Shanks catching strays about his less than stellar parenting choices) and leaves to go train. Now everyone has caught on more or less on the Yassop bullying campaign the residents of Kuragaina have decided to embark on but they hope Mihawk is like, uninvolved. Except he isn't unaware of Ussop, no he is genuinely fond of the boy, would have vastly preferred he showed up out of nowhere because "at least Ussop seems to understand the notions of body odour and daily showering Roronoa" and while not done deliberately, he does bring up Ussop as a positive example for things like cleanliness and "not bothering people with incessant chattering and complaining Perona" (Zoro laughs at this, if only Mihawk knew). This lulls Yassop in a false sense of a security. Yeah, Mihawk is praising his son, but surely he wouldn't say anything about his parenting. So he relaxes, even feels a little proud of his boy making such a good impression, is planning on bragging to the crew about his cool as fuck son who charmed the fuck out of Mihawk after they leave and then it happens. Mihawk gets a glint in his eye and delivers the final punch: "one would think the two of you are the fatherless ones, with the way you are acting. The boy grew up with no father in his life and still behaves more dignified than both of you. To your rooms." Yassop goes back to the ship after this and sobs in his rum bottle.

HELP THIS IS HILARIOUS KWJEFBWJKEBFWKJEBFK

"The Yassop bullying campaign" being a thing is extremely funny to me. Everybody loves Usopp. Everybody is overprotective of him. Perona and him are actually besties and she kind of wishes to see him again because the second her ghosts affect him, that'll mean he's more or less fine mentally (girl is worried sick about his self-esteem). Zoro? We know Zoro loves the fuck out of him. That's his sniper. Back off. He's ready to fight Yasopp if needed, even. And you're completely right about the OPLA thing because I swear the Mihawk/Usopp friendship makes me the happiest person on earth. Mihawk has a favorite son and I won't say who he is because it's obvious. Now Yasopp is shaking with fear and regret because three people apparently hate his guts for his son and now he's extremely scared of meeting Usopp again.

[countingstars-17]

⚠️spotted a nun praying on the side of the track in baku⚠️

[rockieriel]

tyler durden is that you

[shuffleoflove]

today on panels i need to see in the show at some point

[ms-believer-2181]

HE KNOWS

[weneedatdcharacterwho]

We need a td character who arrives on the show an turns out, that literally ALL contestans already know them. But not because they're famous or something but because they worked like a goddamn promoter of some crappy cafe and distributed flyers somewhere in the city center

Bonus points if their relationships with other contestans will depend on what this contestant did with a flyer they had given them (throw it away, saved or maybe even went to the cafe from the flyer)

.

[chibigaia-art]

OMFG IM SO STUPID WHY AM JUST NOW REALIZING YOUR A PERSONA FAN IVE EVEN READ THE FEB 14 PEGORYU COMIC AND DIDN'T REALIZE IT WAS YOU 😭

anon look at my Haru and ryuji manjuus

[campbyler]

trying to catch up with your guys’ blog is like playing chutes and ladders. except i get the slides every time

this ask made me laugh aloud and then start violently coughing so i hope you’re happy