#this one is quite simple tbh aa

[nohenova]

day 7 - HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOB !!!

[kitchfit]

Year in Review: Games Part 1

This is a series I've been wanting to do for a while. Whenever I finish a piece of media (books, games, movies, comics, maybe art and music in the future) I jot in down in a doc so I can look back on them at the end of the year. I wanted to write my thoughts on them as I finished them, but since you have to start somewhere, I'll be writing simple reviews in retrospect. This is just for fun, but I welcome any feedback.

Pokemon Scarlet

This game released with some controversy. It was an unfinished glitchy mess with graphics still not up to the standards of the Nintendo Switch six years into its lifespan, but tbh this game was fun as hell to complete. I loved most of all the new designs and managed for the first time in my Pokemon career to actually complete the Dex. I usually get worn down on that pretty quick.

The characters were also much more engaging than the previous generation, especially my best boy Arven. The environments were super fun to explore and I got a new favorite little guy (Slither Wings my beloved). Here's hoping the next game has an actual sane development cycle and we get this amount of creativity in a higher degree of quality with better paid developers.

Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations

If you thought I only played games that came out this year, sorry to disappoint. I don't manage to pick up even half of the blockbusters that pop up annually, and go after older games way more often. That being said, I see why AA fans hold this game up so high. I played the first and second Phoenix Wright games last year (which I won't review since that was too long ago now) and this is a nice cap to the original Trilogy.

You get Phoenix's background as a dorky bisexual art student, Mia's first case as a defense attorney, and an honestly heartbreaking quest for revenge through Godot while never stooping to melodrama. (I love his theme it sounds like the Mother 3 Magypsies). Also unlike the first two games, there were zero "filler" cases. Each one was thoroughly engaging and moved the plot forward in a meaningful way. Though, I don't begrudge the earlier cases that fuck around a lot more.

Pokemon White 2

When the OG Black and White came out, I was in the "everything new is lame" stage of adolescence, so when the sequels came out I didn't even bother. Turns out I was the lame one for doing so! In hindsight, Pokemon seemed to reach something of a peak with Gen 5 in terms of graphics and gameplay, and would seek to experiment with new artstyles and gimmicks for the next (looks at watch) 11 years damn.

With the first Black and White, it focused on remodeling classic Pokemon designs and gameplay into something new and modern, and these games add back in most of those classic Mons. The plot is also very action-packed and engaging, and gives a satisfying epilogue for a lot of the characters from the first games. You get to see how the region has changed after 3 years and even get to explore some new parts of Unova, similar to how the Gen 2 games handled Kanto. I hope Gamefreak does something like this again in the future.

Kingdom Hearts: Re:Coded

Prepare for a deluge of this series, and not in any conceivable order. Kingdom Hearts took over my heart, mind, and body Xehanort style for the better half of the year. This title is known for a fun variety of gameplay and an absolute dogshit story. I wouldn't really agree. The game switches up its playstyle pretty frequently, including side-scrolling platforming, railshooting, and turn-based combat but for the most part its classic hack-and-slash 3D platforming that feels kind of grindy, but there's multiple unlockable difficulty sliders that you can use to switch it up if you get bored.

Storywise, there's not a lot for newcomers and if you want to play through all the games as one overarching narrative, I wouldn't blame you for skipping this one. However, if you're already a fan of Sora and Riku's relationship, this has quite a bit for someone to dig their teeth into. The world's are all recycled from KH1, making this one of the two games where you can actually explore Destiny Islands, but they all feel pretty downgraded. The endgame gave me a headache.

Kingdom Hearts

Our best boy's first big boot step into adventure. I watched all of the KH cutscenes for all of the games during a particularly dry season of lockdown, so this was my first foray into the original. The story genuinely holds up to a surprising degree, leaning into the Disney elements more than its Squaresoft side for probably the last time in the series. Its really good groundwork for Sora's introduction as a hero, I especially love the assertion towards the end that it is Sora's choice to help others that makes him worthy of the Keyblade and not destiny. Its a theme that would be both muddied and compounded upon later in the series in a pretty interesting way.

I was almost astonished at how in-depth all of the worlds are, especially Traverse Town. There are a lot more little Disney references and sidequests, like the 101 Dalmation quest, that help the worlds all feel a bit more lively. Also NPCs, which later in the series would become a rare gift. I fucked up on the combat. Did not learn how to do spell shortcuts until midway through KH2. Despite that, it was still fun to wack Heartless with my keyblades six different ways, and it makes me excited to replay it at some point.

Kingdom Hearts II

This is the big boy that every KH fan loves to absolute death. Chain of Memories had already started the series tradition of experimental storytelling, but the mainline sequel takes it to an fascinating and well-executed degree. For the first three hours you are forced into playing a new protagonist with zero context and near zero Disney shit. Vivi is there though and we love him for that. Later on we would see this prologue as the tragic conclusion of another entry in the series, but its initial presence here is jarring in a way you have to piece together throughout the rest of the main game. It would also introduce many of the more headache-inducing plot aspects that are fun to dissect but a pain to explain, such as Nobodies. I see them as ghosts, and no one can tell me otherwise. I wrote a whole absurdist retelling about it.

The worlds are more quantity than quality, I'll be real. About half of them are made up of 4 or 5 flat maps with nothing to do except grind Heartless encounters, (e.g. Mulan.) The other half are a bit meatier but could have benefited from more sidequests and such. You revisit quite a few from KH1 to see how they changed and that's always fun. There's a theme to each of the Disney worlds that add to the narrative, in this title mainly being romance and identity. The identity aspect leans toward the relationship between Sora and Roxas, two separate people who are also one person, while the romance theme hints towards the relationship with Sora and Kairi. Oddly enough, both themes also seem to work towards Sora's quest for Riku, who is in the midst of his own identity crisis while Sora desperately tries to find him. Huh. Interesting.

Kingdom Hearts: Birth By Sleep

This is my favorite Kingdom Hearts game. This was one of the few I was able to play as a teenager and even after all these years I still adore this game to death. It works without knowing anything else about Kingdom Hearts. You don't need to know about Ansems or Nobodies or Time Travel; none of that shit. This is the story of three friends that get torn apart by their own ignorance and one bitter old man on his quest to change the world. Its one story split among three perspectives, and each character you play through the game with you understand the grander narrative. You understand why Aqua's best friend snapped at her, why Terra's little brother is so ready to die. You also get to hear Leonard Nemoy yell "KEYBLADE" in the same cutscene three different times.

I love this game so so much dammit. The combat has a fun collection system where you earn action commands and combine them to make better attacks and healing moves. The worlds in the latter half of the game are also really creative and fun to explore, though you get a limited area to move around in for each character. If you have played previous KH entries, there's a lot of references to make you point at the screen and go "THAS AXEL THAS MY BOY HE'S A LIL GUY HERE." Anyway I'll shut up. Play this game.

Kingdom Hearts: Dream Drop Distance

Never ask me to explain the plot of this game. They added Inception to Kingdom Hearts and also Time Travel. And the story is mostly told through unlockable backstory cutscenes including the premise. Yes, the introduction to this game's story is an unlockable. Despite this, the story is pretty effective. This is Riku's second time in the spotlight since Reverse/Rebirth, though the game is once again split between him and Sora. It dissects Riku's character arc in a similar way to Re:Coded, except uhh this one isn't a computer simulation, he is a Dream. Completely different. It asserts his desire to continue as Sora's protector, and realizing this it is him who ultimately triumph's over Angst Teen Xehanort, saves Sora and passes the Key Test. He's no longer on his Way to the Dawn. He's in the light. It's sweet.

The worlds in this game are based around vertical movement. There's a new Parkour mechanic that lets you wall-step-flip around basically everywhere, and to compensate this the worlds are Huge. Since they're dreams, that also means they're pretty empty of anything to really do or explore. They are pretty at least. There's also a pokemon mechanic where you collect lil guys. I did not realize this mechanic also determines Riku and Sora's stats until the final boss, which caught me off guard. I see why this is a lot of people's fave KH game of all time, but its a little too busy for me.

The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Ages

This is an odd one. I first played this game two years ago at college alongside Oracle of Seasons in my spare time. Eventually my phone-I MEAN MY AUTHENTIC GAME BOY COLOR- broke and I thought I lost my save data for both. Turns out I did not and finished through the last few dungeons. This game makes solid use of the time travel mechanic, which is a mix of Ocarina's time travel and Alttp's world jumping. It's fun to jump sporadically between 1000s of years and see the world in different eras. That rock? Used to be slightly over to the left. Would you look at that.

The dungeons had a larger focus on puzzles in comparison with Season's love for combat, which is probably why this is the more beloved twin. Some of the dungeons had me waddling back and forth for too long until I figured out what to do. You can link these games up to get bonus items like the Biggoron's Sword which is fun to complete. After beating both games, you get an extra final boss against Ganon and a scene hinting towards the beginning of Link's Awakening, which is a nice touch. And then Nintendo declared them two separate Links, for some reason. Beh.

The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time 3D

Oh hey. One of the most beloved games of all time. I have played through this games more times than I know. Probably around like. 6 times I used to boot this game up and play all the way up to the Forest Temple and then restart for some reason, I don't know how many times I actually got to the end.

Its a game that eases you into its idyllic fantasy world before dropping you headfirst into the apocalypse you inadvertently caused in your quest to destroy evil. Its never a melodramatic game though. Its about the loss of innocence. Maturity. Learning that the evil was always there, before the King of Thieves took over the world, before you were even born. It even came from the place you are trying to protect. But there was always goodness too, there was always light. There are always friends to be found in dark places. The style and presentation are peak. The dungeons are rich in aesthetics and well made puzzles. The time travel mechanic is honestly a bit undercooked. But this game is fantastic. Quintessential Zelda.

The Legend of Zelda: Four Swords Adventure

I straight-up forgot I played this. Its fun though. Its a relatively short game, but compared to its predecessor, its a huge improvement. The game plays out in stages like the first Four Swords game, but usually in explorable environments, like towns and forests rather than generic volcano and cave themes. You control all Four Links at once, moving them into different formations to move rocks or put fires out. Or you can do it with friends controlling each Link. I did not. :(

I was mainly interested in this games story from a lore perspective. It features the return of Vaati, the Wind Creep who Lova Da Ladies, but with the addition of the Rise of Ganondorf. You are sent to stop him from a wise owl, Ganon allies himself with Deku Scrubs, attacks the Gorons, and is eventually turned into a monster by his own lust for power. It seems more and more like a retelling of Ocarina in a different light. Eh. Maybe I'll write about my Zelda timeline theories in a different post. Not here though

Kingdom Hearts: Melody of Memory

BACK TO KH BABY! This is a rhythm game, so I don't have too much to say. I've never really played any rhythm game before this, and I'm not sure if this one is on par with the more well-known rhythm titles out there, but I had a good time with it. Its great for people who like Kingdom Hearts music, lmao. You have a lot of unlockable character groups to play through the music with and level them up, but once I unlocked the Days trio I didn't really go for the others too much. Xion my beloved.

The story is hilariously shallow, almost insulted considering its Kairi's first solo outing, technically. She's on her quest to learn all the KH lore she missed out on, and eventually finds a repressed memory of a grown adult monologuing at a toddler for fifteen minutes. Also that her boyfriend is alive so that her boyfriend's boyfriend can go save him. Her boyfriend's boyfriend is also her boyfriend. Fight me.

Kingdom Hearts III

People were. So upset when this game came out. Acted like it was the biggest disappointment since the ill-fated economic crisis of '07. Sure, yea, that's a reference. Well this is the first time I've gone into it and I'm here to say this is probably among my favorite KH games of all time. Strong competitor with BBS. A lot of the criticisms of the story and gameplay weren't wrong per-say, but the issues with this game, such a goofy dialogue, bizarre pacing, and over complicated exposition dumps, are problems with the entire series that fans of the series, in my opinion, have come to see as endearing elements of Kingdom Hearts. Its funny to watch the big cloak guy point at Sora and say "Darkness Light Heart Darkness," and see Sora gasp in fear, while also realizing the importance of that dialogue to the story. It's a feature, not a bug.

The worlds in this game are its biggest asset. They are huge, heavily detailed, heavily explorable areas with tons to discover. Hell, the Pirates of the Caribbean world acts as a slightly smaller Wind Waker. The game adds in most of the mechanics from all the spin offs to give you a lot of toys to play with, such as parkour or sharpshooting, that are easy to forget but a treat to use when you actually remember them.

A central theme of each of the Disney worlds is happy endings. Hercules finally takes down Hades for good. Mike and Sully are able to visit Boo without risk to her safety. The dead Baymax from that one Disney movie gets a redemption arc. Frozen and Tangled play out exactly as their movie which is kind of boring. This correlates with the happy endings the rest of the supporting cast get to experience, including the initially tragedies of the BBS and Days trio in scenes that genuinely got tears out of me. But Sora doesn't get a happy ending. He sacrifices himself to strong-arm everyone else into their perfect circumstance. Literally breaks the rules of time and space to force the universe into saving his friends at the cost of his own life. And then Hell turns out to be Tokyo so its not all that bad. It makes you feel for the boy. This game also lets you play as Kairi in the DLC which makes me happy.

Alright ending this here. I've played way too many games this year this isn't even half. Also only including games I've finished, and games with definitive endings. I played Mario Kart 7 but that doesn't rlly end, ya know? Will try to write these weekly, even if no ones reading them. But if you do read them tell me what you think! Gonna switch over to books next week to even it out. I swear I don't just play games. This is the last Kingdom Hearts game on this list too I swear.

[fuckedurbias]

a-z analysis for ateez hongjoong 💛

a = aftercare

joong would be the softest boy ;-; making sure his partner is okay and not too exhausted and would help them clean up - most of the time he’d do the cleaning up for them, obviously asking if they’re okay to do it themselves first or asking if they want him to help them. he’d bring the tissues and towels from the bathroom onto the bed for them and would cuddle with them afterwards, showering them in smooches. he’d probably sneak in a nice scalp massage too ;-;

b = body part

i don’t think joong would have anything physical about himself that’s his favourite, he’s said that his favourite thing about himself that he’s most confident in is his music skills so let’s talk rap skills,,,,, that would help him be very good at oral bringing that into the bedroom and i just KNOW he’s the most magnificent kisser oh god,,, im weak just thinking about it.

on his partner i think his favourite body part would tie into something both physical and non-physical,,, their throat,,,, the way it moves around when they’re giving him head and the way it moves when they’re moaning and crying out when things are getting frisky,, this ties into joong loving his partners voice too,, just the sounds they’d make when he does anything at all to them would drive him fucking insane in the best way ofc

c = cum

i think while joong wouldn’t have a lot of cum, he’d love to get wild with it at times. cumming on his partners back, chest, stomach, face - whatever was closest during any act. he’d also love his partner to do the same with him, cumming all over him wherever they can and he’d love to lick it up n swallow it and seeing his partner swallow his too, would make him so close to cumming all over again.

d = dirty secret

hmmm i think joong would love butt stuff,,,, anal, butt plugs, rimjobs and everything in between, whether it involved giving or receiving as long as it involved butt play, he is into it.

e = experience

pretty experienced, not overly so but just enough and while he wouldn’t mind if his partner is or isn’t, he’d get so off on the thought of showing a less experienced person the ropes and kind of ‘tainting their innocence’ in a way you know?

f = favourite position

just like i said before,,, butt stuff !! !! so doggy style mmmmm he’d also love his partner having their legs over his shoulders

g = goofy

omg he’d love to laugh while doing things, whether it’s because his partner’s done something unintentionally cute or silly or if he just wants to throw in a cheesy one-liner or pun, he wouldn’t wanna take it too seriously

h = hair

he’s definitely the type to completely shave everything down there, including his ass. he wants everything nice and fresh for his partner and for himself too ofc,, he would just feel more comfortable & hygienic being completely hair free

i = intimacy

if he was actually romantically interested in someone he’d want to make the moments a little more romantic and show/confess his feelings, and if he was in a relationship with the person he’d have his moments where he’d make a romantic setup for the moment but he wouldn’t do it all the time. but he’d for sure always be intimate and want to be close to his partner when getting frisky,,,, or at least afterwards if he was feeling too wild for intimacy O-O

j = jack off

oh joong would 100% jack off quite often, if his partner wasn’t around or if he was just feeling to horny to wait. especially if he wasn’t seeing anyone at the moment whew he’d masturbate SO much.  

k= kink

like ive been saying this whole time !!!! ASS PLAY!!!! aaa a a aa a aa!!! i feel he’d be a kinky motherfucker too and would have several kinks that he actively partakes in and enjoys, too many that i can’t even name them all.

l = location

joong would do it anywhere and everywhere, he wouldn’t do it out in open blatantly in front of people, but the thrill of the possibility of being caught or someone walking in would really add to thrill and excitement so he’d love to do it in the practice room when everyone else is gone at that moment. his favourite place though,,, would be his studio of course - gives him more ~inspiration~ for music and plus he just finds it really fucking hot when his partner blows him underneath his desk,, especially when he’s talking to someone else or in the middle of making a song.

m = motivation

honestly, joong is a simple man. nothing in particular gets him going, it just happens most of the time. his own mind is usually the cause, just thinking about something dirty or fantasising about doing something would make him instantly hard.

n = NO

i don’t think there’s anything at all he’d turn down, if his partner suggested something to him and wanted to do something he’d do it. he wouldn’t knock anything until he’s tried it at LEAST once.

o = oral

he’d love receiving and giving equally and he is not ashamed to admit that he loves getting head so much. if he was in a committed relationship he’d love giving just that little bit more and would often give without wanting anything back, but obviously if his partner offered he wouldn’t refuse. he is good at oral and knows it and loves to see his partner squirm as he works his tongue and he loves to see his own dick disappear inside his partners lips.

p = pace

joong definitely loves a bit of everything and it 100% just depends on his mood, but most of the time i think he’d go for more fast paced sex, fast but deep thrusts - not necessarily rough. and when it’s more sensual and slow the thrusts would then tend to be harder & rougher, and even more deep. whew, that thought is painful to think about.

q = quickie

100% would always be up for quickies, especially when his partner is more in the mood for it than he is. quickly dashing off to the shared/disabled toilet, feeling no shame if anybody sees them go in or come out together. also no shame with leaving whoever they were with at the time together, not making any lousy excuse as to why they’re suddenly rushing off somewhere together and coming back all dishevelled, even though him and his partner would try to clean up and hide the fact they just had some rough, dirty quick sex.

r = risk

100% loves to take risks in sex & relationships (with consent ofc) and would 100% experiment and be completely unphased by it. he’d experiment with all kinds of people if they were also willing and he’d just love the thrill and to try as much as he possibly can.

s = stamina

if joong was super horny and/or had been waiting for a while to get his rocks off he’d finish pretty quickly, but would quickly reload to go for another, longer round. he’d be able to go for quite a few rounds, up to 6-8 over the span of a full day.

t = toy

he’d DEFINITELY own toys and would love to use them on both himself and his partner, he’d love butt plugs, anal beads and cockrings especially. also, how i said he loves butt-stuff before, he’d LOVE his partner to peg him (if they don’t have a dick) and use a strap-on hehehe or just stick vibrators up his ass. on his partner he’d love to do the same and would love to use toys that help him in teasing them and overstimulating them.

u = unfair

god he’d be the WORST and would never not tease his partner, denying them of coming a few times before finally letting them come all at once, with the strongest most visceral orgasm they’ve ever had. he’d also love his partner to tease him and make him beg to be able to come as well hehe

v = volume

joong would NOT GIVE A FUCK about who heard him and his partner going at it, he would be so loud when he wanted to be and even if it wasn’t loud, he’d always be noisy and letting out a variety of moans, whines, groans, curses, everything of the sort. he’d also love when his partner was as equally as noisy, letting him know that he’s doing a good job and that they’re enjoying themselves.

w = wild card

like i said before about the butt play,,,, he is 100% a switch,,,, and if his partner didn’t have a penis,,, PEGGING!!!!!!! HE WANTS TO B PEGGED LET THE BOY BE PEGGED!!! (or just fucked in the ass if his partner DOES have a penis)

x = x-ray

hmmm tbh i don’t think he’s that big, probs in the average range but on the smaller end of the spectrum but not to worry, he can use it and everything else well too.

y = yearning

ooo i think it’s pretty high, at least most of the time if he was with someone. if he wasn’t exclusive with anyone i think he wouldn’t be phased much as it’s harder to get some if he doesn’t have anyone to go to.

z = zzz

joong would do it at any point in the day, not just nighttime so he’d fuck and then go back to doing chores or leave to go practice and make songs in the studio (which is rlly hot to think abt ngl) but ofc he’d fuck when he comes back home to, probably for a longer time and then yeah he’d fall asleep but definitely not quickly after, he’d be up just scrolling on his phone for a while.

[juliangrant]

CHARACTER INTRO:

NAME: Julian Joseph Grant

AGE: 36

OCCUPATION: Defense Attorney 

BIRTHDAY: March 28th, 1985. (Aries)

HOMETOWN: Phoenix, Arizona.

FACECLAIM: Chris Evans

BACKGROUND:

The Grants were a legacy that only a special few could uphold. Born from old money, many successes, and lawyers at their top grade, the family name would stand the test of time. Henry Grant, and his wife, Andrea, would come to dote on their children, wanting perfect statues of successful, money, and power. Therefore, this meant that Henry had his eyes set on Julian following in the promising footsteps of a Grant, going into law, ruling with an iron hand. What Henry Grant hadn’t counted on? Just how hardheaded his oldest would come to be. Always on his own path, it’d come that Julian and his father would clash more then anything else. Julian wanted to be free, and see where life took him. He didn’t care about the name he was born under, or the successes his family seemed to come with. He simply wanted to live life his way, and because of this, the divide between father and son was most noticeable. At 16, Julian would come to meet someone who would change the course of his life. It was love at first sight, or so it’d seem. This girl seemed to be the one to get the wild and carefree Julian Grant under control. So, much so, that Julian would make the decision to move out of his family’s mansion, at the tender age of 17, and shorty after the two young teens would find themselves married. And oh boy, did that set ablaze so bright.

But at the time, no one could tell Julian anything. He was simply gonna do what he wanted to do. This, however, maybe the one thing he should’ve taken advice to. Just short of a year of his young marriage, the woman he was so sure was the love of his life had left him. Ring on the counter, and a note with an simple ‘I’m sorry’. A realization that she was following after her dreams, which didn’t exactly involve him, anymore, it’d seemed. The broken heart he’d feel was unbearable, as was the anger. Picking up a piano that he had in his place, he’d proceed to throw it against the wall. And the next thing he’d know, he was trashing the room. Little did he know that the broken heart he felt would be the least of his worries. His dreams of playing professional ball would also come to a crashing haul after a drunken night had left him incapacity of continuing on the field. Instead of stopping there, he'd dive deeper into the bottle. Drinking away his problems. The memory of her, the pressures of being a Grant, his lost dreams of getting away from his family, and playing ball, everything. One night of that would turn into many, and before he knew it, the alcohol seemed to take him completely out of his reality. He felt in control of his life, despite the fact that this was further from the truth. Before he knew it, he was making even headlines in his town, adding to the scandals the family was so well known for. Not at all surprising to those around them. After all, Andrea Grant had made the headlines countless of times in just the short years prior, following her divorce from Henry Grant. Her son now making them just seemed like the apple that fell from the tree. This would all come to a head when he’d find himself in a bar fight one night. Angry at the world, and fuel by the liquor in his veins, he’d come to nearly beat a man to death. Leaving him only hanging on by an inch of his life. He’d come to find himself facing time in prison for his assault. But as one could expect from a Grant, the family name, his father’s representation in the court room, and the money they held, it’d all would proceed to do Julian well. Getting him off rather light, he’d find himself doing countless hours of probation in place of the jail time he was looking at. But with his light sentence, came strings. His father now owned him, and Julian did very little to fight him. 

Julian would take this time to fix himself, going to AA, he wanted to get control of himself once again. Along the way, his father would also regain control over his oldest son. Setting Julian up on the path that Henry always felt he should've been on. Pulling the right strings a long the way, Julian would fall into line. Law showing to be a natural talent in the blood as he was a shark in the court room, only following foot steps that were so desired of him. Who he was only a shadow of who he was, his past feeling like it was hardly ever apart of him. as he now seems to be the perfect mini me of his ruthless father. Working along side him at the family firm. 

ALSO

Over the years, his heart has turned rather cold. Focusing more on work and such, as his love life has only ever truly been a joke. he has come to realize that the less he involves such serious commitment into his life, the happier he is.

He is ruthless in the courtroom, and his success proves that it works for him. That ruthlessness has translated into his personal life, just a little, but most people still find that they’re capable of starting up a conversation with him and getting through with it just fine. Most people who knew him growing up would say that he isn’t remotely the person they remember, nor thought he’d be. Some would consider that a good thing, others-- not so much.

THE GRANT FAMILY:

Henry Grant: A powerful man who likes things his way. Extremely hardheaded and unwilling of change. The relationship between father and son is at best --- just okay. Most days they butt heads, and argue. As it is truly almost like having two of the same people in one room together. But their relationship has gotten a little better from where it was years ago. They are two very powerful men in their own standing, and that is sometimes not the greatest thing to have around at the same time. 

Andrea Grant: A carefree, wild, live loving woman. Once stuck to follow the dreams her own parents had for her, she found herself quite unhappy for quite a long time. Her marriage to Henry was a rough one, more for show then anything else. His mother has gone on to do her own thing since the divorce, she’s very open with her body, and high end sex work (ex. toys, having posed in play boy, just being very much a MILF, which makes him extremely uncomfortable when people realize that’s who his mother is, and they wanna speak on it.) Most days its hard for his mother or father to be even remotely civil to one another. 

2 younger siblings: He’s close to his siblings, for the most part, but they have all had their issues with different things in the past. Their parents have definitely screwed them up, and that’s probably the thing they can share and agree on the most.

(pinterest) 

WANTED CONNECTIONS

THE BEST FRIEND: M/F/NB. This person has been by his side for a long time, and may have even helped get him sober when he first went to get help. This is his person. The individual that can get through to his no matter what. 

COLLEAGUES: Lawyers, cops, judges. Anyone who would work in law and would have come across each other at some point. It can be a good relationship, it can be a bad one. 

THE FIRST LOVE: This would be his ex-wife, and the whole young love disaster. They were together most of high school, he wasn’t the nicest person when she first met him, but she got through to him unlike most have. She ended up leaving him about a year after they got married. For absolutely whatever reason. 

THE SECOND SHOT: Despite how shitty his first marriage ended, he managed to find someone else. Only this didn’t end all that well either, once again, for whatever reason. But this relationship was just as much a string as the last.

HOOK UPS/FWB: He is so very good at these. A little too good at this point. This is an area he masters, and he likes that. He doesn’t care for the emotions, but the sex, he enjoys the sex. And he enjoys experimenting. No nights spent, no names given, no emotional baggage. Best of both worlds.

SIBLINGS: There’s 3 of them. So they could all be boys, the last two could be girls, it could be one girl, one boy. It could also be nonbinary. Anything works. And I will put out a WC with more info on that later.

POSSIBLE EXTENDED FAMILY (ex. cousins, but ALSO STEP-SIBLINGS): As I do believe his parents possibly remarried.

ENEMIES: People will 100% hate him. There is no doubt there, so any which one, I’m down. He defended someone your character hated. He was a dick to yours one day at a coffee shop. Might hate him because of his family. The possibilities are endless here tbh.

Truthfully I am open for everything and anything. I can’t wait to plot with you guys!<3

[elisaminimeneghini]

Italian Nats 2019 Recap

The 2019 Italian national championship was held in Meda on September 13-15 and it was also a trial for the upcoming worlds. Asia D’Amato won the AA competition, followed by Desirée Carofiglio and Giorgia Villa. Alice D’Amato came in 4th, Elisa Iorio in 5th, and Martina Maggio in 6th. These 6 gymnasts make up the team plus alternate that will compete in Stuttgart. My personal recap below the cut.

(Pic from GAI on FB)

- Asia D’Amato showed up in really good shape at this competition. She was the only one among the Brixia girls to hit 4/4 which allowed her to win the competition with a 55.200 (no bonuses). Her vault boosted her total with a 14.900 for her DTY which clearly shows that she’s been working on an Amanar lately (which hopefully she won’t debut before next year). Together with her Yurchenko half-on half-off she qualified in 1st for VT EF and went on to win that title (easily) with a 14.375 avg. On bars she struggled a bit with a close pak catch, but recovered and still made UB EF where she then counted two falls but it really wouldn’t have mattered as this is her worst event. On beam she was the only one to hit consistently at nats and also at the previous friendly meet in the Netherlands, even though she only has a 5.1D. On floor she brought her FTDLO (pretty piked and not landed very well) + DLO. She still needs to do a lot of cleaning up on the landings but I’m glad they worked on her stamina, since she finally managed to hit the full routine twice without dying. Casella revealed that the long term plan is for Asia to bring back the double arabian in third and only do 3 passes total (FTDLO, DLO, double arabian...send thoughts and prayers).

- Desirée Carofiglio also looks in an amazing shape. I honestly don’t think I’ve ever seen her look this confident and solid AA as she is now and I’ve been stanning her for ages so I know what I’m talking about. She was second only to Asia (who had a huge advantage with the big score her DTY earned her) in the AA and only by .2! Absolutely crazy. On vault she has her good 1.5Y back and a second vault which is a fhs pike. She unfortunately sat her 1.5Y in EF which kept her out of medals, but that’s clearly a fluke. She hit bars both in quals and EF, and she’s showing a lot more confidence and cleanliness of execution. Her Nabieva, while still on the pikey side, is getting consistent and her handstands have improved a lot and she scored a 14.000 on both days on this event, finishing in 4th in EF only because the 03s are excellent here. On beam she consistently hit her solid routine, going 13+ on both days and earning again a 4th place. But it’s FX where she truly shines with her beautiful front tumbling and great choreo. She brought back her front layout to double front tuck and her Dowell which she landed extremely well every time and this plus her awesome artistry (with a little help from Lara Mori not being very clean and Giorgia Villa not making FX EF) earned her the gold medal on floor. Overall, an amazing competition for her, and I hope this showed Casella he can count on her for more than just floor at worlds.

- Giorgia Villa, despite not having the best day in qualification (oob by two miles on her triple twist on floor and fall on beam on her tuck full), with her huge vault and bars she managed to snatch the bronze AA medal ahead of Alice D’Amato (who wasn’t exactly thrilled about her 4th place LOL, see pic, she’s in the pink leo)

Anyway, Giorgia still managed to make UB and BB EFs (beam was a bit of a splatfest in quals) and she won gold in both with superb routines. On bars Giorgia now has a consistent 6.2 routine which is full of connections including ricna-pak-maloney-bhardwaj which she sometimes connects to the VL. On beam, the roundoff tuck full has a decent hit rate, but since it’s such a hard acro, it will forever make me nervous. I’m very happy that (for now at least) she has taken out the double pike dismount in favor of a simple double twist which she can stick and, since her twisting form is great, gets wayyy less deductions. It should be noted that there have been hints from Brixia and GAI that both Asia and Giorgia are training Amanars (which is not surprising as both their DTYs are looking really good and you can tell they’ve been working on that extra twist lately, from the way they land the DTY). Hopefully and realistically, we won’t see them before next year but this is both exciting and terrifying. On floor, I’m also pretty confident that a Silivas is in the works for Giorgia, since her full-in is beautiful and high. I hope she ditches the DLO forever in favor of that. At nats (or at the dutch friendly) she hasn’t done the DLO so yay for that.

- Alice D’Amato looked like she was going to medal in the AA over Giorgia but she counted a fall on beam on her new double wolf turn and that put her in 4th place instead. Vault and bars looked great for her as well, however her floor needs extra work as her opening DLO is still short and so is her triple twist in second. This was particularly clear in FX EF, where she landed both passes kinda badly and then scratched the rest of the routine while touching her ankle...It *looks* like it shouldn’t be anything major, but she will undergo some checks before she can be declared fine. Hopefully she’ll be ok, it would be such a shame if she got injured again after all the struggle with her previous comeback. She won the bronze medal on bars with a great 14.200 routine.

- Elisa Iorio looks like she will be the one not doing AA at worlds out of the 03s right now, unless they’re having her peak riiiiiiight before worlds. She’s looking strong on bars, her best event, but on beam, the other event where she should shine, she’s still inconsistent. On vault, she brought back her DTY which, despite not looking dangerous, is not up to speed with the D’Amato and Giorgia’s, “only” scoring a 14.400 (for comparison, Desy’s 1.5 scored a 14.3). This has me wonder whether she’ll be vaulting or not. She definitely won’t be doing floor I’d say, since she got a 12.900 for a hit routine. I think unless her DTY improves in the next few days (unlikely) they should just have her do UB and possibly BB. I don’t know if I would bet on her or Desy’s consistency more tbh. Right now I’d go with Desy. She won silver on bars with a good routine. She didn’t connect out of the pak but she did connect Ezhova-VL which is very impressive. I wish she’d be able to bring back her endo dismount combo but I think she’s been having issues with it since she’s grown quite a bit. So now she’s just doing a double front.

- Martina Maggio proved once again that she can be a great backup asset and she will most likely be the alternate at worlds. She brought back her 1.5Y that is looking strong. Her bars and floor have a low D, but because she’s so clean and precise, she gains in E what she lacks in D. It’s on beam that she could offer the most to the team, with her cleanliness and consistency. She has added a double wolf turn on beam With her 5.3D, she managed to win silver in EF on this event, right behind Giorgia Villa. I’m so happy that she’s back on all 4 events after being injured repeatedly for such a long time.

- Lara Mori didn’t do AA and generally didn’t look too sharp BUT this is definitely understandable as she’s not planning on going to Worlds. This was her decision, she specifically asked Casella not to go because she wants to try and go the world cup route to qualify for Tokyo and get a spot no one will take away from her (smart). For this reason, she doesn’t need to do AA or to peak until Cottbus. Despite this, she still managed to make BB and FX EF and to win a silver medal on floor after a good routine, if a bit unpolished, with a .2 oob. I truly hope she will manage to qualify for Tokyo, however unlikely. It breaks my heart to think that it’s gonna be either her or Vanessa (or neither), but tbh if I had to pick one I’d 100% go with Lara, no matter how sentimental I am towards Vany. Lara is an amazing gymnast and she deserves so much more than what life (and Casella) has dealt her so far. Best of luck to her.

This competition also marked the return from injuries of Giada Grisetti, Maria Vittoria Cocciolo, and Noemi Linari. Giada especially looked very sharp and ready on all 4 events, despite some downgrading. I hope all 3 of them will manage to stay injury free because they can really be assets for the future.

Another notable result is Irene Lanza’s solid AA performance. She made all EFs but beam (where she was third reserve) and snatched a bronze medal on vault with just a FTY. For someone who seemingly came out of nowhere last year (in terms of national team assignments), she’s grown immensely and she should be really proud of herself.

Here are the EF rankings.

VT

UB

BB

FX

[michinekot]

Right. Greetings, dearest artist. To summarize, im an old fan who lost their tumblr account for quite sometime so im kinda lost about all your OCs and persona. You got a table of contents or something? Lol

Hi hi!! I'm sorry about your account D'=And tbh- everything is a mess for me&people who follow me too so kalsjdlaks there’s not too much I can say, although I’ll try to explain some stuff-

I have like- 3 worlds1st one is where Miki (the girl on my latest doodle) is the protagonist. The story is really simple, mostly based around irl struggles&I was planning on making a Visual Novel someday. Preeetty undeveloped, but I think I got the whole base of the story ready.2nd one is where Kai is the protagonist. It’s really undeveloped- So I don’t want to say much about it, other than that his story happens during war and he’s doing his best to protect his little sister - Ari. I started the project bcs I wanted to make a rpg game.3rd world is my monster world, based all around fantasy creatures! Follie might appear in it, too. There’s also Tami, Aster&his family, characters such as Ruby, Choco&Nao, Umi, Vian... I think this one has the most characters who actually get development, haha--Anyway, for this world I was mostly thinking of making a comic, although it’d revolve mostly around Umi’s story... I guess........

I also have 3 smaller stories that got scratched- but one of them has hope!! I never talked abt it before tho-

AND THEN! There’s my flower boy sona... (who I just tag as “Sona”)He’s something between an OC&a persona tbh--I started drawing him as myself&his personality is(+story /would/) be based on me! I was thinking of making a super short comic with him, but I might just give up on it bcs that’d be the first&last serious thing I did with him lol ((bcshedies))(btw you can call him by he/they pronouns. I also like to call him Mako (tho it’s not an official name I gave him.. he doesn’t rly have one...) bcs that’s what I always named myself in games when playing as a guy lolol)what else, what else aa... oh!! I always tag my oc content with “OC” so if you’re interested you can check that out! Or you can just look up the name of a certain OC that interested you.Most of my OCs&especially their stories are just a bunch of wips, so I don’t want to reveal much, but if anyone interests you, I could tell a bit more about them ^^

[curestardust]

if you want: slice-of-life / realistic portrayal of wlw relationships with no fanservice 

We obviously know why I’m here. If something contains wlw, expect me to appear there sooner or later.

Aoi Hana is a pretty special series. Among all the shoujo ai series whose main draw is the fanservice and the fetishization of girl on girl action, Aoi Hana contains none of that. It’s a quite realistic take on the “genre”.

The way I’d describe this anime would be to say that it’s about “Fumi’s first love”. Our main cast consists of Fumi, a very timid and gentle girl who moves back to her hometown where she meets Akira (Aa-chan) with whom she used to be friends with as kids. Despite the expected premise, Aoi Hana isn’t a love story between these two. Fumi meets a girl called Sugimoto on her first day in her new school. They eventually start dating. The series is basically about Fumi’s personal growth throughout this relationship with multiple characters and their interjecting love interests keeping things even more interesting. I’d also like to mention that while wlw relationships are the focal point of the anime, Fumi is the only lesbian in the bunch. Two other main characters are bisexuals and we aren’t really given anything to figure out Aa-chan’s.

With the complicated relationship “drama” you’d expect Aoi Hana to be pretty spicy but it’s a slice-of-life through and through. The story advances at a very slow pace and focuses quite a bit on side-characters’ relationships, friendships and just general school life.

The technical side perfectly mirrors the anime’s pacing and general atmoshpere. The OST contains a lot of piano and various musical instruments and the OP/ED are both slow and soothing. The animation is very smooth and the art direction is quite interesting with the backgrounds only being drawn as if they were just sketched. The character designs are simple but distinct.

However, there’s a reason I said that this is about “Fumi’s FIRST love” as this is just a small piece of the actual story. The manga was unfinished at the time of this production and thus they decided to leave the ending SOMEWHAT open-ended. Not in a bad way as most of the story threads have been wrapped up but they left room for a potential sequel which I’d love to see so bad!”

Sidenote: compared to my review my score may seem low and that is because I may have appreciated how the series was handled, I’m really not a sucker for SOL and the pacing was way too slow for me personally. [7/10] (x)

Recommend: HELL Yeah! | Yes | Eh??? | Nope | This anime killed my parents

if you want: boobs and asses tbh / okay-ish beach volleyball matches

Harukana Recieve is a sports anime mixed with some slice-of-life. Which sport? Beach volleyball. And as I found out from watching this, that is apparently very different from normal volleyball.

The story starts out with Haruka, who moves in with her cousin Kanata. Now living near the ocean, Haruka obviously takes a trip down to check it out where she meets 2 girls playing beach volleyball. Later it turns out that Kanata has certain connections to the pair. This is the start of how Haruka gets her first taste of the sport which later leads to her pairing up with Kanata. A bit later we meet another pair, the Thomas twins, who get the other 2 to join the beach volleyball club at school.

Honestly, Harukana Recieve was quite boring to me. The slice-of-life between the matches felt really slow. They did give some character bulding moments to our characters, however this being a sports anime I think the same could’ve been achieved during or after some exciting matches. And while the anime tries to give some depth to our cast, for quite some time I could only think of them as the tropes they represent...cause of the fanservice.

I looked at a few pages of the manga and was surprised to see that the characters don’t look like they came out of a hentai which means that making their boobs 3 times the size of what they were in the manga was a conscious choice. The creators most likely thought that the story couldn’t carry the anime and instead they filled the empty spots with a lot of eyecandy. Boob jiggles, close up shots of their asses and of course weirdly small swimsuits, everything a salivating virgin would want and more!

Shortly about beach volleyball from what the anime told me: a team consists of 2 people. A pair can only touch the ball 3 times while it’s in their court before needing to send it over the net. This part was initially what I thought made the matches quite boring to watch as it really doesn’t offer much variety. The tactics were the exact same for a long while. Recieve the ball, second person goes up to the net and passes up the ball to be hit over, first person jumps up and hits ball over. Repeat. However, I took a look at some actual real life beach volleyball matches and I realized the problem. The camera work. In real life, the passing of the ball is incredibly fast paced. You barely have time to think, the ball is just flying all over the place. In the anime however, they often pan on the ball while it’s in the air or even slow down the camera after a hit, making the matches feel much more sluggish than they actually would be. This is made worse by the fact that they barely use any wider shots, mostly just close ups from a lot of weird angles, making it hard to discern how big the court actually is and following the ball’s trajectory is almost impossible, as sometimes the ball looks like it got launched into the stratosphere and then we pan to literally a few meters from the person who hit it.

Obviously, the lack of tactics used in the matches could be attributed to the fact that Haruka is new and she is slowly progressing. Which is realistic, but doesn’t make it any less boring. 

The final 3 episodes more or less consist of one match, which is the most exciting part of the whole thing. It still has the problems I pointed out above but as the 2 pairs are both more or less experienced, the fooling around is finally over and replaced by some actual tactical playing. It helps that the match also carries much more emotional weight than the ones before.

Well this ended up being hella long...if you just wanna look at boobs and asses go ahead tbh. If you want the beach volleyball part just watch the last 3 episodes. If you’re not interestested in either, then... [5/10] (x)

Recommend: HELL Yeah! | Yes | Eh??? | Nope | This anime killed my parents

if you want: beautiful presentation and nature scenes / some insight into diving /  iyashikei (healing slice-of-life anime) / peculiar charm

Amanchu! is a special case for me. I see it mentioned a lot that one of the most exciting points of the anime is that it’s made by the creator of Aria, which I’ve obviously heard of but haven’t seen yet. And while this would work great towards me not comparing it to a prior work of the mangaka, I still made a mistake by having preconceptions about what this anime would be like. 

My vague memory of the plot was that it was going to be about a diving club. Great! Basically another sports anime, which I’m fine with. However that wasn’t quite the case.

In the beginning, we’re introduced to Futaba (Teko) who moves into a new town, away from her dear friends. She is very shy and timid. Then at her new school she happens to meet a peculiar girl named Hikari (Pikari) who quickly befirends her and makes her join the diving club with her. The overarching plot of the anime is Teko’s change from a shy little girl into a much more mature young woman thtough Pikari, the diving club and the sport itself. 

That is, in the first half of the anime and then the last episode. However, there’s a pretty big chunk of Amanchu! where the diving barely gets mentioned in favour of some slice-of-life and character building episodes, some of which focus on the side characters; the other 2 members of the diving club, a twin sister and brother and the club manager who’s their teacher. Unfortunately, most of these episodes fell flat for me as they really aren’t...very interesting characters!

While my lack of enjoyment in most of Amanchu! could be chalked up to me being a bit sick of slice-of-life stuff thus making it hard to get invested in what was happening, there’s something else that can be a huge turn off for people which is the “comedy”. Whenever something that demands a reaction happens the characters’ heads turn into a circle and their faces kinda turn into an emoji (for examples look up ‘Amanchu faces’). All of them have a specific “emoji face”. This looks cute of course but the anime uses it SO OFTEN you sometimes feel like you see their normal faces less than their emoji faces. Characters also have certain “ticks” like Pikari constantly saying “upyo!”, Teko making this high pitched “eeeeeehhh??” and the twin sister kicking her brother in the back at basically every occasion. The “funny sibling abuse” trope I hate anyway but your opinion of these things I just listed could make or break the series. It could either annoy you to hell and back making it basically unbearable to watch or you can find it incredibly charming and entertaining. 

If you’re on of those many people who find it charming then Amanchu! will be a great iyashikei (healing anime) for you. The presentation is absolutely gorgeous with soft linework and a vivid but inintrusive colour palette. The background music consists of some very nice instrumental tracks. Of course, the anme shines especially during the diving and underwater moments while the slice-of-life episodes bring up some less serious but everyday questions. The enjoyment of small moments is a big part of Amanchu!.

This anime wasn’t really for me but I’m still giving it a quite weak 7 as I don’t think it deserves to be listed with some of my 6 rated anime that are objectively much worse. [7/10] (x)

Recommend: HELL Yeah! | Yes | Eh??? | Nope | This anime killed my parents

[herotheshiro]

ok i didn’t do a review of the phoenix wright trilogy but i’ll do a mini-write-up on apollo justice which i just finished earlier. this is mainly due to me looking up apollo justice/ace attorney afterwards and seeing ppl talk vaguely abt how and where the series and characters go after this... i wanted to add my 2 cents to the void of the internet i guess lol

spoilers for aa4 below

i think as a story, apollo justice is quite good but definitely a bit lacking in writing compared to the 1st trilogy. i feel like this is pretty much the common fan opinion, esp since the 1st trilogy was written all together as a 3-game-set and apollo justice has to conclude everything within 1 game. i think this game did real good at revealing info over time... i remember when they revealed the troupe gramarye poster and i was like WAIT... THAT’S SHADI SMITH... HOLD UP... personally though, i think the ending was not very strong for me -- i feel like we nailed kristoph almost a bit too easily at the end without much i guess concrete evidence linking him to everything even if basically everything was really pointing to him. [EDIT: lol ok reading summaries on aa4 and yeah apparently this is the point and why it being a jurist sys trial was so important… and the realization that he really could get nailed for the crime that he’s been paranoid abt for years made him break down at the end. Ok that makes sense I guess, I was just used to things playing out like the 1st trilogy where you would last min get decisive evidence lol] other than that, there was quite a number of loose ends that didn’t get tied up

so what happened to valant? i think the implication was that he was gonna turn himself in out of guilt even if he didn’t actually kill magnifi (sp?). and also w trucy having the rights i guess it would be complicated for the 2 of them to work that out. that whole aftermath wasn’t entirely clear to me esp since they didn’t give him a post-credits scene

so we’re not gonna get an explanation for why thalassa left her not-even-1-yo son to fend for himself? that was like my no. 1 thing i would’ve liked to get a reason for but the ending is just her being like oh yeah i remember now he’s my son and that’s it. no explanation for why she left him behind and returned to troupe gramarye w/o him. like at least a “oh it would’ve been complicated to bring a literal baby to raise back into that traveling group” would’ve sufficed, esp since we’re supposed to get the impression that lamiror is a kind woman. yet she left her damn kid behind with only a bracelet. were we just supposed to assume the explanation i gave above? i mean yes i’ve looked it up vaguely and i think we get more info on apollo’s growing up in later games but i’ve heard w very little mention of thalassa. which i mean i get, thalassa left him when he was around 1yo so he prob wouldn’t remember shit but man we never gonna get that explanation huh. it’s kinda messed up to leave this baby behind who i assume you care about; it’s another story if she didn’t want the kid and therefore didn’t care what happened to him but she left a bracelet w him which implies she does care

also the loose end of them not telling apollo and trucy they’re siblings. i’ll save this for a later paragraph though

also side note but when i was finishing the game up and before i saw the ending, i literally had a passing, very brief thought like “oh what if lamiror was actually trucy and apollo’s mom lol. what a crack thought” but then it actually happened... i mean it’s good to wrap up that mystery of lamiror’s past, plus they were insinuating so hard that maybe thalassa wasn’t actually dead lol so yeah you knew the mom was gonna pop up fr by the end

apollo himself as a character. now i’m not gonna nit-pick as much here bc he does show up again in later games w more backstory and character development as i’ve heard, but yeah he is very much a mystery character in aa4 i feel. he has basically no given history throughout the game, and the lack of detail made sense at first when you slowly started connecting the dots that he and the gramarye power were related, but then they never really shed any more light on him at the end. they really only reveal he and trucy are related just to explain why and how he has the power to perceive, not even to really indicate anything abt them as characters. i kinda forgot about this as i played the game, but i read a write-up by someone else being like “oh yeah phoenix you know his motivations as a defense attorney but apollo has basically none” and i was like yeah that’s right huh. bc the 1st trilogy reveals p early on that phoenix had a certain motivation to be a defense attorney but apollo you don’t get that, he’s just an attorney just to be an attorney i guess. which i mean is fine, you don’t always need a reason to do stuff sometimes, but it does make him a weaker character. i think maybe in the beginning they were like oh apollo respects kristoph as a lawyer but then they don’t really develop mpre  backstory there like how they met or why kristoph decided to take him on. i thought the latter was gonna be a point that was gonna come up, like maybe kristoph took apollo on as part of his large masterplan or something bc i think kristoph does mention being aware of apollo’s “power” but yeah they didn’t delve further into that. anyway i’ll go less on this bc i’ll just assume they had plans for him to show up in later games therefore they didn’t fully flesh him out here. otherwise that means they just didn’t bother on him other than him having the perceive power and having a personal relation to the whole gramarye case

how did drew misham or vera idk who painted it know abt all of apollo’s 3 cases? i thought it was gonna be like oh phoenix or kristoph saw all this coming and somehow told misham abt it who drew it but uh that didn’t happen. was that bc drew misham was following phoenix in the news and saw the stuff happening w apollo and was inspired to draw his cases? that was a dramatic reveal when apollo/trucy/ema found it out but i mean i guess it was just to show that misham was connected to them/the overall story more than just a simple jurist sys test case

the last writing thing i’ll mention is abt trucy and apollo being siblings. after the whole phoenix x maya crap in the 1st trilogy i suspected they were gonna do the same with apollo and trucy... thankfully they didn’t which was good bc i liked them a lot as a platonic duo, also since i actually thought apollo was 25yo for a while so that age gap is pretty weird too if you do it romantically. i suspected they were actually related p early on after discussing my playthrough w my sis who upon googling info said ‘lol i did say why not ship them but i will not say that anymore’ so i was like lol it’s prob bc she found out they were related or something. regardless i mean i would have suspected that anyway bc the game pushes the ‘oh this perceive power is really only seen in trucy’s family line’ so hard so it’s like not that hard to draw the line bw them, esp when they’re super vague abt apollo’s history and how he even got that bracelet in the 1st place. anyway i think it’s cute to imagine two siblings running all over town to solve shit. as expected tho, there are still ppl out there who ship them even after knowing the truth which is meh but i mean what do you expect of fandom/the internet.

although one of my biggest disappointments is the fact that apparently even in later games, the two never find out they’re siblings. i mean i guess it’s not a major plot point that NEEDS to be addressed as covered in point #3 above, but come on? their mom is literally still alive? a mom and her children reuniting and developing their family relationship again? i mean she’s been so distanced from them for so long that a family reunion would be awkward sure but zak literally made phoenix promise to tell trucy apollo was her bro so i’m surprised he never told her even before his conversation with thalassa at the end of the game. like i thought for sure they were gonna reveal their sibling relationship in aa4 but sadly my imagined revelation scene never happened

(i literally thought up a funny scene too... them seeing thalassa and both being like “MOM??” at the same time and then looking at each other in confusion before thalassa confirms that yes she is both of their moms. although this makes less sense on apollo’s part since he prob wouldn’t remember what she looks like but i mean same bracelets)

otherwise, gameplay was pretty interesting this time around. music was bopping tbh, i played aa4 right after finishing trials and tribulations and wow the music quality improvement was so obvious. the perceive thing was pretty cool and their tutorial on how to use it was super cute lol (apollo: that’s cool but i’m freaking out a little here // trucy: yeah your eyes are kinda bugging out); although absolutely hilarious on how apollo "explained” it in court... imagine a lawyer looking real hard at you and then being like ‘actually you swallowed weird when you said this therefore you’re lying’... i cannot even imagine how that sounded the 1st time to the judge and klavier... anyway i also thought the MASON technologies chapter was really interesting, w phoenix going back and forth through time and using evidence from the future for the past and vice versa. fun time traveling stuff!

ok and that’s kind of all i wanted to say i guess. i’m prob gonna try to stay in the dark on fan content stuff like i was purposely doing before playing aa... i was looking some stuff up and i was like ‘huh... i didn’t get this impression of apollo or the apollo/klavier ship when i was playing aa4...’ i don’t want to get my own opinion of these characters warped by fan content/others’ opinions so i might just take a bit of time to solidify how i feel about/characterize each of the characters before i trek out into fandom land. also it’s prob bc i haven’t played apollo’s later games since he supposedly gets more character dev later. tbh idk if i will bc to be frank i’ve been using emulators to play aa so far and i don’t think there’s a rom out for the later aa games on 3ds. i mean if there really isn’t, i’ll prob just watch a playthrough on YT so i can continue the aa story since i did like apollo as a character despite his lack of backstory.

i was considering skipping edgeworth’s games to go right to dual destinies and continue on apollo’s story/the aftermath of that game, but tbh i’m less incentivized to since i’ve heard that the story/character continuity aspect kind of goes out the window in later games (also the point abt apollo and trucy still being in the dark abt them being siblings. even though yes it wouldn’t change how they interact w each other, i would also prefer the fact to be known officially in-universe so characters don’t be freaks as apparently there are some lines in later games that are a little weird). i mean i could end up having a different opinion abt the continuity, but yeah seeing those comments did put a damper on me diving straight towards dual destinies. so i might just play edgeworth’s games first as i originally planned anyway since they were developed right after even if they take place before aa4

[pinksweatergettingbetter]

warning, the following has mainly snarky (and possibly furious) opinions on Spirit of Justice. Reader discretion is advised.

Trucy, you don’t need to take sides. There’s one side. The truth. And both Apollo and Phoenix are on that side.

They’re not at the same bench but they’re on the same team. It’s gonna be ok.

-

“I’m sorry too, little lady! this is all my fault..”

Oh so trucy gets an apology, but not Apollo? cool cool whatever 

-

Trucy, if Phoenix and Apollo become bitter enemies over a property dispute then they weren’t really all that close to begin with.

-

Dhurke: invalides trucy’s feelings while simultaneously spouting more of his Manly Man shit

-

“one minute we’re trading blows, and the next, we’re having drinks together”

well if that’s his mentality i can see why he thinks its ok do be an utter fuckwad to everyone

-

“We’re simple creatures at heart! Hah-hahahaha!”

yes... men are so simple at heart... they’re just a bunch of neanderthals... thanks Dhurke, truly you are the way to the future.

-

To be honest, I am glad that this is a civil case. When I first saw the publicity I was sure they’d made Phoenix a prosecutor for no reason and I was furious.

I’m not super glad at the way things turned out but at least the bullshit counter didn’t go into the red and explode.

Phew. I’m actually sighing in relief here. Maybe I can pretend what follows is all a friendly game or something.

-

Aww; poor Judgey’s confused :(

-

...they seriously don’t need to have a falling out to be on the opposite side of a courtroom. Lawyers face each other all the time. 

They don’t have to hate each other, they just have to keep things professional, otherwise they’d cause a conflict of interest. Like... it’s not ideal but tbh it’s more a danger to their clients than each other.

-

Y’know, I’m gonna dare to be optimistic here; as much as I hate this storyline and most people in it, this is actually an interesting and character-developing scenario.

Apollo has to face off against his mentor, the guy who... well I’d say Kristoph taught him all his tricks, but Phoenix was a sort of moral guiding force, I guess. Apollo standing up and holding his own against a superior is a legitimate way to show that he’s come into his own. Plus, since it’s not framed in a negative light (or at least, it shouldn’t be) it’s more impactful than phoenix being straight up evil since that would make it easy to take him down. This is a contest between two people who simply happen to be on opposite sides of the chess board. Again, it’s a pretty legit way to show Apollo’s growth.

...that said, I just wish it wasn’t happening after zero character build up and a heaping serving of bullshit. :T

Oh well. At least they got something right.

-

it is pretty hilarious how much they’re trying to up the drama though. it’s not that deep, guys

-

I guess Atishon just doesn’t have legs 

[snerk] his shitty speeches are actually kinda funny. ...if a little cliché.

-

...he’s standing... but I'm still not ruling out that he’s legless...

-

Tbh, even though Atishon is clearly lying, the fact that Datz basically threatened the orb out of Buff does make this kind of in their favour. 

-

...Apollo, don’t overcomplicate the case. All you have to do is prove that it’s not the crystal and you can have it. 

-

Reasons Apollo would make a good rebel: He doesn’t blab his rebelness all over the place for no reason.

-

SEXY PAN UP SHOT FOR MS. SKYE

nice ankles, ms skye.

-

“Ema..?”

“Use some manners, we’re in court”

thats not the way you acted the last time you were called as his witness :/

-

whoa seriously whats with the sudden crazy 180 for Ema? Yeah, she’s grumpy, but suddenly she’s acting like Apollo’s some rude little shit off the street. Why is she upset that he’s going up against Phoenix? Why does he need to apologize? JUST BEING ON OPPOSITE ENDS OF THE COUTROOM DOESN’T MAKE YOU ENEMIES.

or did the SOJ team forget the lessons we learned in the trilo–– oh who am i kidding they’ve never even laid eyes on those.

-

“You’ll never get the job done with that attitude. Take it from someone who’s been there” Been where???? Been where, Ema?????? what the fuck are you talking about what is going on 

-

haha the fey statue and the urn were ‘stolen’, huh? yeah. stolen from a better game.

-

pfft. So Buff’s some Kaitou Kid type, huh?

-

y’know ive been neglecting to mention it but have you noticed how much they skimp on animation compared to DD? DD had like 20 tiny animated cutscenes, and SOJ has one lame one at the beginning of each case to set it up. I can’t believe they even slashed the animation budget.

-

has anyone noticed how unfocused 3D phoenix looks. he looks like he’s just. staring out into space.

-

i love they don’t use gendered pronouns to refer to Buff’s kid. Remember the last time they did that? Mr. Andrews......

-

“I was shocked to see the urn that came from Kurain in Kurain”

anyway quit referencing actually good games, SOJ. Back to the shame corner for you.

-

oh COME ON. How do you steal a fucking wall relief?! 

and he really couldn’t just get a fucking permit? what the fuck is this

-

“but good intentions are no get-out-of-jail-free-card”

they are a sentence-lightening card, though! either way, this is one of the things i like most about AA. No matter how good your intentions were you still dont get away with cold-blooded murder. 

OR KIDNAPPING, AURA. HAVE FUN IN JAIL YOU SHITTY EXCUSE FOR LESBIAN REPRESENTATION.

-

every single theft of an artifact can be attributed to Dr. Buff. every single one.

-

alright, so we’re back to that whole ‘missing object report’. Thing is, unless there really IS a Crystal of Ami Fey, this wouldn’t work out. Atishon has to provide evidence that he owned the item, or that it existed in the first place. If this crystal turns out to be made up I’m gonna pitch a fuckin fit.

Don’t disappoint me, SOJ.

-

“Wimperson”

ah, SOJ, with all the comedic genius of a third-grader.

...to be fair i could say the same about Larry but i like larry and AA1. and it also plays into his phrase-thingy!

-

seriously. gimme pics of the crystal or we’re gonna have some serious problems.

-

“So how do you know this item is the thing he’s looking for”

“he said so”

THATS. NOT EVIDENCE. 

-

oh judge, your oldness never ceases to be to be enjoyable 

(that wasn’t sarcasm btw i love that dumb running gag)

-

seeing phoenix scream from the opposite side of the table is very enjoyable. just because i love seeing phoenix scream but also like having that scream not mean something bad for my case. 

i get to have my cake and eat it too! <3

-

um i dont think you can put dashes in email addresses.

-

“Don’t tell me!”

“Oh, but I will anyway.”

I love Apollo so, so much.

-

so you looked far enough into this that you tried to hack his computer but you’ll accept “its mine cause i said so” as concrete proof of something??

-

“Maybe the recipient of the email was a dog lover!”

he might be on the other side with the kid gloves off but phoenix is still Phoenix “a baseball also has stitches” Wright.

-

fuck. he walks to the bench. he cant not have legs.

...but maybe........

-

what the fuck

Atishon has the same birthday as my dad

DISGUSTING

-

oh my god, seeing phoenix /sweating/ on the other side is even more surreal

-

i also love that everyones making ‘politicians are gross’ jokes willynilly but they all forget that they’re Criminal Defence Lawyers

-

“This is... Quite... a thing... you’ve said”

I'm wheezing

this is turning out to be way funnier than i expected

please SOJ I'm having fun don’t stop me now

-

i mean he has a point. if Atishon leant the item to Bluff to study that still means that Atishon owned it in the first place.

HOWEVER, WHERE THE FUCK IS THE PROOF OF THE ORIGINAL ITEM IN ANY WAY RESEMBLING WHAT WE’VE GOT HERE.

-

its so weird to see phoenix on the wrong side of the bench that i keep getting his voice wrong when i read him out loud. i keep making him sound deep and authoritative instead of... well, how he usually sounds.

-

“Well, grandchildren ARE meant to be spoiled... I mean, that’s what grandfathers are for!”

judgeyyyyyyyyy

im crying

-

ema: can i fuck off now

-

“lets get more info on the crystal”

FINALLY. thank you, athena.

-

NO, NOT ITS HISTORY, DAMNIT

PROVE THAT IT EXISTS AND YOU OWNED IT.

-

“back in the old country”

...england..?

-

pft i though his testimony said “The Hilarious History” instead of illustrious history and i was so ready

-

“he protected the spirit mediums, a minority back then, from the rest of the locals”

well thats a big fat lie because

A) Kurain village is build on mediums

B) no way the Fey clan would allow a male ruler

we could reaaaaaaaallly use some photo evidence, Atishon.

-

“One Ives Shineto”

ok what the FUCK. where the hell are all the women?! HEY. SOJ TEAM. DID YOU EVEN GLANCE AT THE  oh of course you didnt fuck meeeeeeeeee

also whats that pun

-

FFFF PHOENIX YA LIL SHIT

-

“The transformation the mediums underwent when channeling spirits frightened the locals”

i am glad to know changing your entire bone structure is as scary looking as it sounds. of course, i doubt people would be frightened for too long when they were talking to deceased loved ones.

-

i must say they did do a good job writing Atishon’s lines.

-

“The Kurain channeling technique is known to have originated from Kooraheen, and Ami was said to travel there to train”

No, Ami invented the technique, and according to your backstory, she lived there first. Can you even keep your own facts straight?

I mean, apart from all this being bullshit and i hate it.

-

i legit cant believe it took THAT LONG for phoenix to point out the fact that the handover agreement was signed under duress.

that'd be like, the first thing i pointed out. 

...ah, there it is. I knew this couldn't stay a happy little civil case for long. Here comes the murder.

Also, really Phoenix? You didn’t bring up the fact that he might have been killed any earlier too?

-

Now that theyre bringing up the pile of books, I realize how ridiculous it is that there were so many of them on the ground. Pulling out one book might dislodge one or two next to it, but not the entire shelf. For the books to have fallen like that, they would have needed to have been shoved from the other side, or for the shelf to have listed forwards. neither of those things are possible. and nobody noticed this?!

i mean the only reason i didnt think about it was because i knew this was murder from the start.

-

Man, Phoenix, with all your “with respect for the dead” talk, it sure did take you a while to bring up the fact that you knew he was murdered and the police should probably be getting on that right now.

>edit: Actually I just realized how despicable that is; keeping the fact that this was murder secret just to use it later on as a quick bargaining chip in your civil case.

Hey capcom? You can screw up the series all you like but FUCK you for making Phoenix a skeezy piece of shit on par with the likes of von Karma. Because you know who else withholds information that sensitive for such a petty reason? MANFRED VON KARMA. 

Fuck you, capcom, fuck you, fuck you, FUCK you. 

-

“Did you forget who you were up against, Mr. Justice?”

All I do is hurl baseless accusations!!

-

wow the second this turned into murder i just got tired of this case. Also, Phoenix, you better back your butt back to your seat. Being a murder case, this requires a prosecutor... something that you are not.

-

theres AN AUTOPSY REPORT. WHY ISNT THIS A SEPARATE TRIAL.  THIS SHOULD BE A SEPARATE TRIAL; THIS SHOULD BE BEING... TRIAL-ED IN ANOTHER COURTROOM. you can reference it, and use it as evidence, BUT YOU CAN’T JUST COMBINE THEM.

Damnit, Capcom, I TOLD YOU NOT TO DISAPPOINT ME.

BUT YA JUST COULDN’T HELP IT, COULD YOU.

-

...Datz is in the gallery... But he was just in jai–– fuck it whatever

-

ok now that this is a murder trial Atishon’s non-answers aren’t funny anymore, theyre ANNOYING. I WANT THIS SHIT TO BE OVER AS FAST AS POSSIBLE. YAP ME A CONTRADICTION OR I’LL CRAM YOUR BELOVED PLAQUE UP YOUR POLITICALLY INEPT ASS.

-

“Try me, o lord of plebs”

its been a long time since any meme-y type person has called someone else a pleb... please try to keep up, SOJ.

-

i love that phoenix, at the end of each statement, politely states “get the fuck on with it, asshat”

-

why the fuck did he 

fall asleep what

OOO THE JUDGE YELL 

AW YEA

-

“What did I ever do to deserve this?”

you existed in the first place, Apollo. I’m sorry.

-

No.............

I do not like that Phoenix used the phrase, “Witness, I think it’s time for you to come clean.”

You know who uses phrases like that.

Assholes.

-

“You should know I always come fully prepared, Justice!”

( buy it, buy it, buy it, buy it––)

-

...Right, so Phoenix isn’t a prosecutor but he sure as hell has been doing a lot of prosecutorial things. Calling all the witnesses, explaining the case, etc.

Oh and he and and Atishon still didn’t tell anybody that Buff was most likely murdered right off the bat so ffffffuck you capcom 

-

Fuck you, Datz. Stop laughing and fucking focus on the fact that you’ve been accused of murder and it’s kinda tough on your ol’ pal Apoll– oh wait silly me i forgot none of you give a rats ass about him. All you do is laugh and eat and sit around waiting for Sadmad to come home.

-

“Better brace yourself, son”

Hey guess what Dad warranty expires if you haven’t made or tried to make contact in 20 years so get that word out of your nasty mouth, Dhurke.

-

“Worried this might make a rift between you two...

...and that you might then leave the agency”

haha

“Hahaha. She has an active imagination”

hahahah

hahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahhAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA

-

“...Nothing a little persuasion couldn’t handle.”

Capcom. If it was something douchey. I will tear you in half.

-

SEXY PAN UP SHOT FOR

robot guy

-

i remember when i used to be excited for each new case. now I'm just scared what new horrors the next will bring.

-

hang on why does the drone not have a special sound font? if it didnt disguise the operator’s voice it would be kind of obvious who they were...

-

HOLY SHIT MISSILES

SO... THE WHOLE “BOMBS IN THE COURTROOM ARE HORRIFIC THING” FROM DD IS JUST FORGOTTEN, HUH??

-

hang on.

“Capitalist pig; I’ll turn you into pork stroganoff”

is “Sarge” legit Russian, then? That explains the “Komandir” thing. Shit, I have to change my voice.

-

ok so Sarge is written with an American Sargent phonetic accent, but uses Russian rankings and seems to be communist. What am I missing???

-

“I guess he does dress like he’s in the military...”

hes a paratrooper!!! why dont you know that? i thought you grew up with him.

-

“That’s true. Papa didn’t keep our house locked up.”

...the... archeologist... with a house full of priceless treasures... didn’t lock his fucking doors.

hey congrats for trusting the mediums and all but guess what? thats irresponsible as fuck and incredibly stupid for a supposed thief so I'm kinda surprised it took you this long to be discovered/bumped off.

-

those have got to be nerf bullets cause firing a GUN in court is just fucking ridiculous. like too far for Ace Attorney. Melee weapons, ok. Long range firearms? No.

...Though... Note to self... Next time, when creating parody prosecutor, you now have legit grounds to just give him a fucking gun........

-

“Sorry, but I’m afraid lawyers are missile-proof.”

Note to self. Upgrade gag prosecutor to missile launcher.

-

ooh, i see this drone is in the same vein as the Assassin’s Radio.

-

“Courtroom warriors don’t use guns or missiles, because evidence is our weapon of choice!”

Ahah! THATS why prosecutors are so violent. They never have any evidence to back up their assertions so they just fuckin ASSAULT people.

-

i... had a little chuckle at ‘truth bomb’

-

“What’s with him and Siberia of all places?”

Well context wise it seems he's some kind of... Defected-to-communist American?

-

Huh. Athena’s powers must be based purely on sound waves then. Interesting. 

Anyway, it’s mood matrix time! Hooray!!! I’ve warmed a lot to the Mood Matrix to be honest. I like the glowy lights.

-

I’m gonna make a guess right now that something was on fire. Cause thats some PTSD shit right there.

-

pfft the gallery was so on board with their new judge overlord. Also thank goodness this is Ace Attorney and this shit is allowed to fly, cause you’d get your ass handed to you if you tried this in real court, pal.

-

Um, I wouldn’t dig any deeper if sarge is still in such a state. It’s not... safe. Either that or you best hope that thing’s bottomless magazine has run out. Plus, I love that whoever’s watching over the actual Sarge in the Lobby hasn’t tried to stop them when they noticed them SCREAMING AND PRESSING THE ‘FIRE’ BUTTON REPEATEDLY.

Or they’ve left Sarge unattended and the Dark Age of the law isn't over because it was an omnipresent thing to begin with...

-

its ok, game. contrary to what you think, you did write Sarge’s backstory in a memorable enough way for me to remember it up until now.

-

Huh. 

HUH.

So... the person involved in writing Ace Attorney Investigations... Has written a sequence in which we must burn evidence to prove a point, huh?

:T

-

DONT YOU HINT AT ME, GAME

-

that solemn moment of reflection doesn’t include Phoenix cause he’s over behind his desk bawling his eyes out

“I’LL BE YOUR NEW PAPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA”

-

actually Athena’s got a point. Her tragic backstory is much more similar to Sarge’s than Apollo’s. She can properly relate to losing one’s last family member in a horrific way.

-

S––

Well, considering her age, Cutesie Pan-up shot for Armie.

-

Apollo’s having serious Robin Newman flashbacks right about now

-

ahhhhhhhhhh. her mom was Russian. It all makes sense. Tbh just for now, forgetting everything else, this kind of does feel like an old case. I’m at peace... for now.

-

i guess it’s less of an orb and more of some kind of lantern then. Cause you can’t really burn a crystal

unless its

whitcrystal

hahah

hahahahahahahhaha

-

so far I'm ranking the cases from best to worst: Magical, This part of Revolution, Foreign, Rite and Storyteller. 

-

sgsjgsjsjjs athena’s INTENSE LOOK OF HUNGER as Apollo burns the orb

“I wanna see me some sweet mama goddess”

-

damn shit thats her face

thats uh

o

ohhhh

oh i see. I was wondering what the ‘great power’ the orb could bestow upon people was, and now I realize that since it depicts her face, if someone knows her name, they could channel her. And since she's basically an actual goddess that would bestow some serious power.

not bad, not bad at all.

i know i highly dislike Kooraheen but i legit feel kinda blessed

-

“The issue is crystal clear”

*seals phoenix’s fate with a fucking pun*

-

dont keep saying “did we just win” before the verdict is handed down, you'll jinx it.

-

oh hey, blackmail. its like a perfect reenactment of Capcom getting Phoenix to sign onto this sequel.

-

Phoenix: According to the legend, once the founder returned... She would bestow spiritual power onto the person who solved the riddle.

Apollo: ...Y-youre kidding, right?!

[Apollo looks flummoxed, the gallery whispers. We cut back to Phoenix’s smirk, and then––”

???: Phoenix... Just give it up.

[Phoenix screams in shock. We pan back to Apollo......... Who now has D-Cup breasts and a very familiar face.]

/...i wish.

-

legit tho i cant believe he's trying to pull this. I'm cackling

this is the lawyeriest lawyer ploy ive ever seen

-

“What’s gotten into him?”

bad writing.

-

sdsgsdhjafhgj EVEN THE JUDGE IS CALLING BULLSHIT IM CRYI

-

(sigh) i guess we’re really gonna have to finish this, aren’t we. oh well. on we go! let’s forge ahead!

-

y’know i just remembered that Pearl appeared like, once in this. Was that her only part? I guess she just existed to remind us that Kurain village used to have girls in it.

-

noooooooo fuuuuuuuuuuck

i really hope the contradiction doesn’t require pressing because i aint sitting thru this fuck’s antics again.

-

it has rounded corners.

and its huge.

-

phoenix and apollo’s objections are too similar, i can never tell who’s screaming.

-

“There haven't been many murders there, I take it”

well........ not “many”

-

i love that Atishon pledges to banish murdeer from Kurain village and Apollo is all “yea good luck with that” like Murder is inevitable, even in a tiny village like Kurain.

Thats. kinda terrifying.

...though considering the way Kurain is...

-

i cant tell phoenix and apollo’s voices apart (sigh)

i never know whose objecting 

-

Phoenix: my client couldn't have viewed the murder directly from where he said he was, but the fact remains that he had inside knowledge of said crime!

...phoenix, you’re just trying to help apollo along, right? you didnt seriously believe that that sounded positive to your case, instead of Shady as Fuck, right??

-

“You talk big, Mr. Justice, but do you have what it takes?”

he just finished telling Phoenix he was about to put what Phoenix taught him into practice. Phoenix should be swallowing a lump in his throat and trying not to cry of pride right now.

-

“that suitcase could be a weapon anyone could use!”

yeah... yeah! even someone in a wheelchair!! oh wait wrong case.

..........but we still have someone in a wheelchair

-

a 3D crimscene view

haven't seen that shit since AAAJ

-

‘THAT SHITSTAIN ON THE BOOK PROVES HE WAS HAVIN THE COFFEE SQUIRTS, CASE CLOSED BOYS”

sorry i just felt like being vulgar

-

“and there it is, the final excuse cornered killers are so fond of”

holy shit

i love apollo

-

phoenix shut up please, just shut up

let it end

let me rest

-

oh wait

ah here we go.

-

“hes a bright young politician with a future ahead of him, its in our nations best interests to avoid burdening him with the taint of scandal”

hey, uh Enshiro

ill never forgive you for putting those words in Phoenix Wright’s mouth

-

“Lawyer! Do something! Or a bad thing will happen to ‘her’!”

no? nobody else heard that incredibly obvious threat? nobodys gonna

“whats he talking about? well, i can ponder that later. for now...”

FUCK

YOU

DO YOU HAVE A BRAIN THAT IS CONNECTED TO YOUR FUCKING EARS?!

HOW THICK HEADED DO YOU HAVE TO FFUCKING BE TO NOT RECOGNIZE A GODDAMN THREAT WHEN YOU HEAR ONE YOU 

YOU

YOU PUTRID PICKLED RED PEPPER?!?!??!?!

-

Athena: oh yeah i also heard Atishon making blatant threats at Phoenix but meh, phoenix made me pinky swear not to tell. 

I’m not shitting a lung in fury, I’m just getting rid of an organ i dont need through the nearest available passage. I’m perfectly calm and not cursing this game, Eshiro and his entire team to the pits of their own stupid made up hell.

-

“I had no idea. This must’ve been excruciating for him.”

i wanted to write a sarcastic jingle but i had trouble coming up with rhymes, so the blunt bottom line is:

when you’re not good at writing, simply steal clever and impactful plots from previous iterations so that you’ll seem clever and exciting

i mean

nobody even remembers Farewell my Turnabout anymore, right????

-

what the fuck is his deal with being king

-

OH SHUT UP DURKE 

GO FUCK YOURSELF

think youre gonna steal Franziska and Mia’s thunder????????????? no

you aren’t a fucking fraction of an inch as cool as either of them.

-

“he’s saved my neck so many times”

w

when

-

“where there’s a will, there’s a way”

how about where theres a whip, theres a better game?

-

“wait................... maybe we can summon the founder now that we can see her face??”

aww. you got there in the end, didnt you apollo.

-

...that doesnt automatically spare Maya’s life. Pearl is also a spirit medium. And i’m fairly certain there are other–– oh wait SOJ retconned that neverMIND

anyway, Atishon could still bump Maya off and then force Pearl to channel Mamma Kooraheen

-

OH MY GOD HE JUST BROUGHT UP PEARL

WHY PEOPLE ARE SO STUPID 

-

WIMPERSON BROUGHT UP PEARL

THE IDIOT VILLAIN BROUGHT UP THE FLAW IN YOUR BRILLIANT PLAN 

GSEGFISGUILSGIULSGUI;SRHG

-

“pearl wouldn't help you if anything happened to maya”

um. you morons think he’d politely ask her to help??? he's already kidnapped someone and threatened their death?? he and his founder aren't above torture or blackmail????????????

you FUCKING MORONS

-

why even bother resigning? just do what you did before and let him go to jail.

-

...this’d better just be a lead up to his breakdown animation 

-

YOU COCKSUCKING FUCKSTAINS JUST END IT ALREADY

END IT END IT END IT EDN TI EDNEI HDFI HSRLG SIHFLIHIR HF;LIVHLSIRHIGHISRHOVGLORIH’WI’HSGOI’WSGZIHSI

-

“if only you'd been smart enough to kill the girl, too...”

wow

-

...what the fuck

well that was... interesting.

-

i cant even celebrate Phoenix congratulating Apollo, I'm just so tired

there are like 85 sarcastic remarks i could make but I'm just so exhausted 

-

yay we got the orb

dootdootdoot dootdootdoot

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even the judge doesnt want to have anything more to do with this.

im right there with ya judgey

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“All I can say is, thats my boy!”

NO, YOU DONT GET TO CLAIM PARENTAL PRIDE OF THIS KID

HES NOT YOUR BOY

YOU BARELY RAISED HIM

GO HOME AND DO YOUR SHITTY COUP

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“Still, its kinda nice to be appreciated”

if only you actually were, Apollo

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yeah, thought so... ill bet they dont even channel her. cop out.

“tsk, thats no fun” indeed, trucy

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i love how nobodys like “OK WHERE’S MAYA??? IS SHE OK???”

its fine her whereabouts are unknown and the last info on her was just that her life was in danger

pfffff

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its alright, Armie has a place at the WAO 

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"i knew if i admitted i could walk, id have to leave the house”

uh honey newsflash: you can leave the house in a wheelchair too. I'm pretty sure your dad would let you stay inside anyway

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christ how fucking corny can you get. I CAN WALK AGAIN. why dont we just have Tiny Tim in here throwing away his crutch and dancing a fucking jig

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see, there we are. Maya’s still in danger you fuck wits.

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and part one is over, folks! i am pooped. and furious.

till next time.

[nerdyskeleton]

ALL of the author asks

all right, you anonymous rogue, let’s do this. under the read more for length. I’m answering this instead of doing my accounting homework mua ha ha. But thanks in advance for asking for these it made me feel really nice and it was so fun!!!

1) is there a story you’re holding off on writing for some reason?

Ah I mean not really? I have a bunch of ideas bouncing around, but I don’t have the time or the energy to sit down and start another multichap really. Still recovering from the last one haha. Plus I need to have the main story planned out before I start writing, as well as most of the big details, so I don’t want to start something without knowing where I want to ehh vaguely end up.

2) what work of yours, if any, are you the most embarrassed about existing?

oh my god. Everything that’s on ff.net. I wrote SUCH garbage from like 13-16(?) it’s just all such a disaster. But there’s quite a few multichaps there that are complete so I’m proud of little me completing those haha. But it’s all SO cringe-worthy.

3) what order do you write in? front of book to back? chronological? favorite scenes first? something else?

(lol “““““book”““““) I do write from beginning to end! Sometimes if there’s a scene I suddenly have a really good idea for I will sit down and get most of it out, or at least jot down some notes for what I want to happen. But I try to write in the order of the story so that I can update consistently! And I try really hard to write ahead, like I didn’t start posting School Daze until I had a few chapters as back up, so I could work on the future ones as I updated weekly, like a bad ass.

4) favorite character you’ve written

I LOVE writing Trucy. She’s one of my favorite characters in the whole AA series - she’s just so fun and lovely. Plus it’s fine to like write a regular person instead of prissy ass Edgeworth or Blackquill.

5) character you were most surprised to end up writing

I mean I personally never expected to go as hard with Blackmadhi as I did and in such a short time span either!! I’ve written 80k of Blackmadhi in 2 months like girl can you cool it for a minute? Also I didn’t like Blackquill AT ALL while playing DD so the fact that I’m such a thirsty bitch for him is surprising to me. Here we are though.

6) something you would go back and change in your writing that it’s too late/complicated to change now

7) when asked, are you embarrassed or enthusiastic to tell people that you write?

tbh I don’t tell anyone really! Well, not people who are already confirmed dorks like me. Mostly because I don’t want to get into the “oh what do you write?” conversation hahaha. “uh…..gay lawyer fanfic?”

8) favorite genre to write

Hmm…….I mean I’ll go for angst and hurt/comfort all day long, because there’s nothing more satisfying to me when I do something terrible to the characters, everyone gets mad at me for it, and then I fix it later on with a happy little scene of pure love and compassion between the characters.

9) what, if anything, do you do for inspiration?

Hm. I’ll normally put on some Disney music, because that has been my go-to inspiring music for a very long time. Sometimes I’ll go back and reread some parts of whatever I have written recently to be like “Look! You actually like this part! Write more so you can keep feeling this way!” Or I’ll read the last bits of the last update to remember where I was even going with the plot line LMAO

10) write in silence or with background noise? with people or alone?

I like to write with music! It has to be very specific music though. Being with people who are also writing/being productive helps, so then I feel obligated to get stuff done too haha.

11) what aspect of your writing do you think has most improved since you started writing?

??? man I have no clue. I guess I’m pretty good with like……not sweating the little stuff. If I feel like I don’t have much sentence variation in one paragraph, I leave it, because it’s okay. Not everything has to be poetic (literally NOTHING I write is poetic). I feel like I make up for it later on with a paragraph with better flow. I hope. Idk these things, friends.

12) your weaknesses as an author

I guess like……descriptions?? Both like physical background descriptions like where they are, because I feel like knowing the scenery can be pretty important. but also like facial and behavioral descriptions too? Like sometimes I’m too lazy to find the exact word I want so I just pick a generic one and move on. I love getting things done, so sometimes the quality isn’t what it could be because I just like finishing things hahaha.

13) your strengths as an author

I’m pretty good with writing things out the way I want them the first time, because if I’m going to write I want it to be right (hehe). Obviously I go back and edit things to tweak it, but if I’m sitting down to write something, I don’t want to half-ass it and come back to it later. I HATE finally finishing some huge ass 12k chapter and then remembering I left a scene unfinished because then that means I’m NOT DONE AHHH.

14) do you make playlists for your current wips?

Not really! Mostly because I can never just like listen to whatever music I want. I listened to Hozier for a month straight as I finished up School Daze because for some reason that smooth hipster really did it for me.

15) why did you start writing?

Who knows man!! But it’s fun!! I got super into a book series called Skulduggery Pleasant like it was my first HARDCORE FANDOM that I wrote for. My ff.net is under the same name if anyone wants so suffer through it. Let me know if you do because it’s all disgusting and I want to laugh about it. But ALSO it’s all really problematic so please don’t judge 13 year old me okay thanks.

16) are there any characters who haunt you?

LMAO WHAT KIND OF QUESTION IS THIS.

17) if you could give your fledgling author self any advice, what would it be?

oh man…..keep on sticking with it man. I’m glad you are writing (even if present me thinks it’s god awful) because you made so many friends and really learned a lot, actually. Good on you for doing what you want to do. Maybe also stop thinking of yourself as the greatest fanfic writer of all time I mean just maybe, girl.

18) were there any works you read that affected you so much that it influenced your writing style? what were they?

Yeah, Skulduggery Pleasant again! The author, Derek Landy, writes so sarcastically and I guess kind of simple (not like bad simple haha). I would just crack up every few minutes reading the series so I wanted to be that funny author with clever little deadpan lines like him. idk if I succeeded haha.

19) when it comes to more complicated narratives, how do you keep track of outlines, characters, development, timeline, ect.?

I have a separate document where everything is planned out. Well, not everything, but the majority of stuff. For School Daze, I always wanted to have the next two chapters planned out from where I was currently. I just always gotta know where I’m headed so I don’t get anything mixed up or forget anything.

20) do you write in long sit-down sessions or in little spurts?

It depends! Both usually just depending on the time. I write for a looong time on weekends like a loser with nothing else to do, but if I have like twenty minutes to kill between stuff I’ll think up some lines or finish planning out a scene.

21) what do you think when you read over your older work?

I literally cannot stop laughing at it. I guess it’s not BAD like my grammar was always good and I tried really hard but just like…….I know I thought I was the fanfic SHIT back then so I’m just like “Laura like how could you ever let other people see this???? it makes no sense!!!!!!”

22) are there any subjects that make you uncomfortable to write?

I guess kind of the usual suspects…..No non-con, incest, underage stuff. I don’t write it, so I’m never uncomfortable with it!

23) any obscure life experiences that you feel have helped your writing?

Hmm not really?? Not too obscure, but I took a looong break from writing mostly because I fell out of that Skulduggery Pleasant fandom and I got super depressed in high school. So now that I’m way better, I really enjoy writing again because I remembered the old feelings of being SO happy when I got a review on ff.net. Makes me feel 13 again, which is actually pretty regrettable.

24) have you ever become an expert on something you previously knew nothing about, in order to better a scene or a story?

Ah not really! I don’t write too much stuff that needs expertise (and also tbh I haven’t written that much like idk what I’m doing here) but also I’m just a lazy shit and will look up the minimum required information for what I need to get done hahaha.

25) copy/paste a few sentences or a short paragraph that you’re particularly proud of“Meaning, Miles concluded, that she expressed a very high level of care and compassion for nearly everything in her life. Soon, her thousands of questions in class made sense, because she just wanted to understand the information to the highest degree. And now that Miles was witnessing nearly a private glimpse into the art teacher’s collage project, he saw the same level of attention that Trucy bestowed on her own projects in Phoenix, as well.With this knowledge, Miles assumed, logically, that Phoenix had been the one to impart this trait into her. And from their date, he now knew the man had taken her in unexpectedly and still managed to raise her right.Phoenix Wright was clearly not only an amazing father and art teacher, but also a wonderfully kind, considerate, and determined individual. How could Miles not be drawn physically and mentally to the man?” I really liked this paragraph, because this was a part of the first time that I had written as Miles Edgeworth and had taken a very long chunk of time to go into some gay-ass introspection. Thought it turned out pretty well???