#this post is such a mess dksfjl hopefully it's readable?

[professorthaddeus]

as sort of a follow-up on my post about fcg’s pseudo-therapy style, i think the contrast between their conversation with laudna and orym’s conversation with imogen was a really interesting look into the difference between saying the “right things” (programming!) and speaking from a place of experience

a quick disclaimer since i’m talking about therapy-adjacent stuff: i’m not a mental health professional (yet :p) and i’m not trying to make any judgments on what fcg and orym did right/wrong here—while fcg’s general angle of wanting to fix people is definitely flawed, i honestly think he handled the conversation with laudna in this episode pretty well! i’m more interested in how his purpose as a Help People Robit translates into how he actually tries to help in complicated (human!) situations, and oh man, the way his approach juxtaposed with orym’s in their respective conversations was very 👀

so from what i got, fcg and orym’s advice to laudna and imogen essentially boiled down to the same thing: when you’re ready (and in laudna’s case, when imogen’s ready), talk to your friend. but the way they each got there felt vastly different—fcg seemed to go about it in a step-by-step way, and you can almost see those steps progressing in the conversation: 

1) assess the situation (fcg asks about what happened with an emphasis on laudna’s perception of it—e.g., “and you think she’s upset at you?”); 2) have the patient talk about her feelings (”do you feel any better having told me?“—which is also pretty indicative of the methodical way fcg’s proceeding tbh); 3) find an underlying cause (”are you jealous of imogen in any [subconscious] way?” “for having a heartbeat?” definitely no projection going on there); 4) provide affirmations/sympathy (”that’s a very noble thing to want for someone” ”i’m so sorry you’re going through this”); 5) get to the solution (”I could try to arrange a neutral space, a safe space where you both could talk“)

orym's talk with imogen, on the other hand, felt much more like a natural conversation between two friends (and ofc part of it is that orym’s reaching out to imogen in concern while laudna explicitly goes to fcg for help—and aah i love that and i love what laura and marisha are doing; it makes so much sense that imogen needs to be prodded before she can vent while laudna is desperately looking for advice in her distress). orym sits back and listens while imogen expresses what she’s been bottling up, and when he interjects, he does so from a place of personal observation (with the recognition that he could be wrong because he hasn’t known them that long)—”i watch you and laudna together, and you guys are so close”; “I see you get down on yourself”; “that dead lady’s got a lot of love in her heart”—as well as with an air of speaking from experience—”when you have a falling out with a friend...”

and really, hats off to sam and liam, because it fits so well that fcg, who only has 2-ish years of memory and is a literal robot, follows a flow chart of how to help someone in need, while orym, who has clearly grown up with emotional maturity and a great support system from at least his in-laws, speaks gently and with an understanding that these things are complicated (and that everything feels even more tangled, more dire, when the relationship is so important)