#to worry about how i’m going to fund myself during the off season (ya girl lives in a tourist town lol)

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I got a job interview on the same day my current contract ends lol. Is my run of bad luck coming to an end or is it more of the same though 🧐

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Untitled

About a year ago I started writing this fic I was pretty tipsy (maybe even drunk). I remember laughing my head off like I was funny lol.

Please don't take this seriously, I mixed my drinks that night I was a mess the next day.

Feel free to call this drabble what you want.  In the meantime, I’ll be updating all the fics this week.  (yes all)

power to fanfic writers, may the new year grant you creativity, no writer's block, and clear skin.

I never understood why the landlord never warned me whenever we had a new tenant.  Specifically when there’s a vacancy next to me.  It shouldn’t be hard, the guy lived two doors down from me.  Though I wasn’t going to say anything to that big burly man.

Three.  Three people in the last 5 months went through this apartment.  And of course being the nice genuine person I am I’d give them a welcoming pan of cake or cookies.  I’d also befriend them, despite my loner tendencies. It never hurts to have someone watch after your cat when you go on a shopping trip.

No thanks to Abe, also known as the landlord.  I found out we were getting a new tenant from Carol.  My other neighbor.  Honestly, I understood why those girls moved out.  One, these condos were expensive.  Two, shopping sprees daddies money didn’t fully cover were more important than rent.  Three, everyone living here was either, doctors, lawyers or some other hotshot.  So holding a conversation without sounding like an idiot was damn near impossible.  Unless of course, you were talking to an actor or my downstairs neighbor, Jessie.  Bless her heart.  I can’t count how much celebrity’s I’ve met just walking to the dumpster.  Just taking out some trash the other day and hey would you look at that, Nicholas Cage.  Well, most of them were old time celebs but they were still famous, right?

As I was saying, right when I got to know these girls well enough.  They went and left me.  I’d ask Carol to watch Mike but she’s allergic to cats.  Morgan was always busy with his son. Glenn and Maggie, well they wouldn’t even bother feeding him.  I’m pretty sure Daryl would just throw him in the trash.  Negan would watch him, but of course, that came with a sizable price and Jessie?  I’m positive she’d kill him by accident.  Sasha watched him before but now she’s always missing since she became chief of staff at the hospital.  Abe would just have him testing landmines in the desert during my absence.

I stared down at my furless cat.  His big brown doe eyes called to me.  Yes, he was ugly.  Everyone made sure to tell me this.  But I loved him.  He’s my little muse.  But a girl needed new underwear, shoes, and blouses.  I don’t know how I managed to survive this long, I haven’t gone shopping in a year.  A whole year.  And if that meant sucking up to whoever was moving boxes of their shit into condo 7 then so be it.

It wasn’t long before Mike started mewling for his morning breakfast.  His stretchy skin rubbed against my bare legs.  His meows only seemed to get louder.

“Don’t worry Mike, momma’s going to get your kibbles.  You want kibbles don’t ya?”  He meowed in response.  I was positive on some level Mike understood me.  He’s been with me for eight years now.  Through thick and thin he stuck by my side. He was two when I lost my job at Atlanta’s art gallery.  I decided to take a leap of faith, the money I made from the paintings sold over the years was meeting its end.  Mike and I were barely surviving, with my last bit of funds I made a tedious treacherous journey down to LA in my small KIA.  It wasn’t long before I lost hope.  Selling paintings on the roadside didn’t pay the bill for that trash motel we stayed at.  Eventually, I took a job waiting at a restaurant.  It was a sight to behold, I earned my degree in the Arts yet I was waiting tables for the hillbillies, hippies and con artist of LA.

But I didn’t give up.  After getting the green light to display my paintings in front of the diner I worked for.  Things started to look better for me.  I sold a few pieces, enough for me to relocate to a different motel.  One that was more inhabitable.  Dale never asked for compensation if I sold an art piece.  He was a genuine man that wanted the best for me, along with a few of the other waitresses that were trying to get through school.  So when he told me about an inquiry on my pieces from a man in a not so modest suite I knew he wasn’t lying.

One can say I’ve made a name for myself, six years later I supplied work for some of the biggest Galleries in the city.  And a year since I had a stable neighbor in Condo 7 after Noah died.  He was a young up and coming actor with a boisterous personality and a genuine smile.  After dying in a head-on collision we all mourned his death.

Pulling open one of my cupboard, I grabbed the bag of overly expensive catnip along with Mike’s bowl.  He nudges my leg urging me to hurry and serve his food.  I loved him to death but his attitude needed an adjustment.

Pouring food into his bowl and I watched as he made a dash for it.  It evoked a chuckle from me.  We were living well.  I admit we gained weight, his pudgy stomach touched the wooden panels of the kitchen floor and those five-star dishes went straight to my hips.  It was Saturday, which meant I was due a visit from Carol shortly.  Yes, Mike gave her allergies but it never stopped her from urging me out of my shell.  Art has always been my safe haven.  A man-made solace of the sort.  I’ve never been one for an abundance of company, which is why, as my work became more popular I sold anonymously.  My first name, Michonne, was still attached to everything I’ve painted but no one actually knew how I looked or my gender.  Unless you count the assholes back in Atlanta, but I haven’t heard any news of them releasing images of my face.  After all, Michonne wasn’t a common name.  Along with my longtime neighbors and the folks who bought my work in the early stages of my career my secret was safe.

As if on cue, Carol’s signature knock sounded against the door.  I rolled my eyes at the clock hanging over my stove.  Nine o’clock sharp as always.

I took my time answering the door, we always had the same conversation. Like clockwork, so I wasn’t in a rush.  Releasing my locks and turning the doorknob I was greeted by a smiling face equipped with a pan of chocolate cookies.  My mouth was watering, my weakness.  I returned her smile and relieved her of the pastries.

“That thing hasn’t sat on the couch yet as he?”  She asked a bit weary.  For Carol’s sake and peace of mind, I was sure to spray the couch and keep Mike away from her designated spot.  I waved her off removing the plastic covering her pastries.

“By thing I assume you mean Mike.”

“Oh yes, him.”  I could hear the humor in her voice.  I shook my head and started the coffee maker in the kitchen.

“I thought you’d want to reserve some treats to sway our new neighbor with.”  Oh shit, I almost forgot about them.  This was my secret, I gave them baked goods, that Carol herself baked.  Normally she’d bring in anything left over from her bakery.  But this was different, these were chocolate cookies.

“They’re not even moved in yet.”  I mentioned from the kitchen.

“Oh sweetie, where have you been for the past seven hours?”  I was sleeping no doubt.  “Last I check they were just moving the last of their furniture.”  Carol was a dear, out of all my neighbors, we exchanged the most words.  I’ll even go as far as to say she’s my closest friend.

“I don’t need to schmooze the new neighbors this early, it’s only nine o’clock.  I’ll let them settle in first.”  After the coffee maker screamed in wake of its completion I grabbed two mugs.  Mine and Carol’s permanent Saturday morning mugs.  I know.  She literally bought a mug for my place that she uses.  I poured us coffee adding sugar.  I walked in the living area balancing our coffee and a plate of cookies.

Uncrossing her legs she took her mug from my hand and watched as I sat down.  I took a careful sip of my coffee, it was hot and the scent from the beans was strong as I inhaled, just how I liked it.

“You wouldn’t have to schmooze them if you’d just buy your clothes online.  This is the 21st century after all.”  She is 40.  Exactly ten years my senior, so her words were more than ironic.  It made me feel decades old.

“Carol we’ve been through this too many times.  I prefer to buy items that are my size exactly.”  I wasn’t lying when I mentioned that Mike and I gained weight.  Living the good life put me up a cup size and made jeans stop to my thighs when I squeezed into them.  It wasn’t as if I wasn’t working out.  There was a gym downstairs I utilized constantly, but once my hips and breast got bigger they decided to stay that way, despite all my effort and time.  “So I buy them in the flesh.”

She just waved me off.  “You don’t need to take a flight to buy clothes, Michonne.”  She was right, but it was one of the perks hard earned money bought you.  I clucked my tongue to the roof of my mouth deciding to change the topic of conversation.

“So how is Ezekiel doing?”  And just like that her blue eyes glazed over.  For as long as I knew Carol, they’ve been together.  I even gave him a few pointers on how to grow his locs.  I was glad they stuck together so I could watch his locs flourish past his shoulders.  I was also elated for Carol.  Ezekiel was a B list actor, one of my favorite actors since he played Victor on ‘The Last Knights’.  It was among many of my TV favorites.  Technically they lived together, but during filming season he had to go to a different state but they kept in touch.  As to why they’ve been together for years without getting married was beyond me.

“He’s doing just fine.”  Her cheeks were tainted pink.  She still swooned over him like a lovesick teen.  I smiled at her.  “Instead of diverting to the man in my life let’s talk about your love life.”  She sported a devilish smirk behind her gray flower mug.

Somehow I fought the urge to roll my eyes.  I knew I was attractive, in fact, most of the men I met found me alluring.  But since no one ever saw me with a man publically they assumed I was a lesbian.  Obviously, since I didn’t want the hassle and stress of a relationship I welcomed the notion.  Even Carol seemed on the fence about my sexuality.

“It’s nonexistent. I don’t get out much to meet anyone, hence another reason I need this shopping trip.”  I told her taking big bites out of the cookie.

“If you’d just go out with me and the others that would change.”  Yes, the monthly ritual they established.  Once a month everyone would get dressed and have dinner usually followed by the night ending at a posh club.  On more than one occasion Negan asked me to come.  He was handsome. I’d go as far to say he was sexy, with dimpled cheeks, a wide smile and a nice head of hair.  But my goodness was he a player.  My guess is that he was juggling about 5 different women right now.  Most lawyers I’ve met had multiple women.  Of course, that didn’t stop him from wanting me.

“I’m not one for outings with packed crowds,”  I mentioned.

Carol shook her head.  “I have a feeling your life will change, Michonne.  And soon too.”

“Are you hanging out with Gabriel again?  My life changed six years ago.  And for the better too.”  Gabriel was a pastor and Morgan’s brother.  He always stopped by to use our gym and Abe allowed it.  He was even gifted with an ID for the front gate last Christmas.  At this point, it wouldn’t be surprising if he moved into Morgan’s Condo.

As much as I complained about needing personal space, I loved everyone living here, in my own way.  Jessie was questionable.  I knew more about everyone’s personal life than they knew of mine.  On occasions, I’d even give them advice and water their plants when I’m not working.  I even parked bikes courtesy of Daryl Dixon.  After Morgan’s nasty divorce I held down the fort and watched his son, Dwayne, when he was on call at the Hospital.

Of course, I was happy to do it.  Dale’s good deeds rubbed off on me.  Because of that, they’d help me in return.  It wasn’t that no one wanted to watch Mike, they were eager to.  But I couldn’t trust them to care for him, especially since they didn’t have the advantage of living next door to me.  Where I held all of his emergency medicine.  He had cancer, which explained why he was bald.  Call me picky.  I just prefer the person next to my condo to watch him if need be.

A loud horn blared from outside.  My eyebrows furrowed silently questioning Carol.  She shrugged and moved toward the window, I simply followed suit.  There we were mugs still in hand peering through the open creases of my wooden blinds.  I squinted trying to make out the face of a brunette.

“That must be her,”  Carol whispered.  “Wait I see a man in the car...”  She paused.  “He looks homeless.”  I scowled in confusion.  Abe always did background checks.  He didn’t have connections to the military for nothing.  I didn’t blame him for wanting to make sure people were able to pay their rent.  Abe also offered a deal to share land, once you’ve paid a suitable size of money you were able to live in your condo without monthly rent.  It was a choice he’d offer and it was cheaper in the long run.  Of course, household bills still had to be paid.  Some people like Daryl and Carol chose that from the start.

“Why are you whispering, it’s not like they’ll hear us through the window.”

“It’s more polite.”

“Like the action of peeping can be softened with whispering.”  We both laughed before Carol shushed me.  I caught a glimpse of the man, he was still inside the sleek black Porsche.  He had quite the beard on him.  He also wore a ratty baseball cap which probably caused him to be called homeless.  It hid his face well so I couldn’t make out his features.  The brunette went back to the window leaning in close to the bearded man.  “Oh looks like they’re a couple.”

“What do you think they do?”  I asked Carol still staring at the couple, mug in hand.  I had no shame.

“I have no idea.  But I’m guessing the woman’s a model.  Though Abraham didn’t mention there would be two of them.”  She did look like a model.  Her silky hair reached past her shoulders, leading down to a trim tight body.  Hopefully, she wasn’t another Jessie.  Jessie did something to deserve my spite, she may not remember but I do. Oh, I remember very well.

The last person to move in was, in fact, Jessie Anderson, so in our defense, we did the same thing to Jessie when she moved in four years ago.  Along with the three women who moved in over the last few months, if they counted.  When Jessie modeled her way to her condo but couldn’t figure out how to open her own door. Bless her soul. We figured she had a sugar daddy or was a model.  We were right on both counts.

“Oh goodness, we can’t have another Jessie.”  Even Carol understood.  After a moment the woman pulled away from the car and it drove off.  She was heading this way. Shit!

We tried our best to scramble away from the window without spilling the remnants of our coffee.  I switched on my TV opting to settle on a random station.

“You think she saw us?”  She asked me.

“We’re inside unless she has a third all seen eye that’s impossible,”  I told her taking in gulps of caffeine.  I was quite sure we were in the clear so when a knock bounced off my door it caught me off guard.  I spilled coffee on my capris night pants.  A frustrated moan left my throat, these stains were hard to get rid of.  I was forced to answer the door with a stain the size of a black hole on my white pants.  I still had my locs gathered on top of my head, I decided against letting it down.

The door swung open and I was greeted by another smiling face for the second time this morning.  It was the brunette.   Up close she was actually quite stunning.

“Oh, I’m sorry I was actually looking for the landlord.  I’m Lori by the way.’’  She stuck her hand out towards mine her nails gleamed with a clear coat of peach polish.  I took her hand after a moment of silence.

“Michonne.”  She was nice.

Her eyes lit up upon hearing my name.  “You’re not Michonne the painter are you?”  Her tone held curiosity.

“Umm, no.  I’m not.”  Although she seemed nice I didn’t know her.  If the painting on my living room wall wasn’t any indication of who I was then she really didn’t need to know.

She rolled her eyes and dropped my hand.  “Of course, she’d have enough money for better…uhh apparel maybe even a house.”  Bitch! Her eyes darted to the stain on my pants. I wanted to scream ‘but bitch you’re living here too!’ I held my tongue.  “How silly of me.”

“It was an honest mistake.”  I had to suck up to this bitch?  I think not.  Funny how first impressions left a lasting mark.  I’ll mourn the loss of new undergarments later.  My only hope was that her boyfriend was nicer since her ring finger was bare.

Lori nodded lacing her hands together.  “Like I said earlier, I was looking for the landlord.”  Her tone was short all of a sudden like she didn’t want to stay by this door a minute longer.  I pointed to the left.

“He’s two doors down.  But if I were you I wouldn’t bother him this early on Saturday’s.  If Sasha answers you’ll be in luck.”  Abe didn’t have a knack for Saturday mornings, any time after eleven was better for him.  I learned the hard way after the pipe in my bathroom burst.  I ran to Abe banging on his door.  By the time he answered, he was red-faced and shirtless.  He fixed my plumbing problem but I was left with feeling that I interrupted something.  He didn’t speak to me for a week.

Lori thanked me, clearly ignoring my warning and made her way to Abe’s door.  I placed the locks back to their original position and turned to face Carol.

“Well isn’t she a dime.”  Carol mentioned sarcastically.  A dime indeed.  I rubbed the stain on my pants although it didn’t do anything to fade it.

“Now I’m hoping she does catch Abe at a bad time.”

“Just take my advice Michonne, order clothes and have it delivered here.  It’s what I always do.”  We were back to that conversation again.  We passed the time sitting together discussing neighborhood changes, our TV shows and of course neighborly gossip.

“Have you noticed that Maggie gained some weight?”  Only Carol would notice these small things.

“So? I’ve gained weight.”

Carol shook her head, exasperated with my line of thinking.  “Michonne, you weren’t having sex nonstop for the past two months.”  I was a tiny bit offended.  In fact I hadn’t had any sexual exploits since leaving Atlanta.  That was years ago.

“How would you know this?  You don’t even live next to them to hear anything.”  She scoffed at me.

“I’ve seen enough displays of affection between them to light up a cow.”  Maggie and Glenn had been married when I met them.  They actually gave me hope that there was a forever.  They always said they’d wait to have kids, both being in the drug research field.  They wanted to focus on their careers before adding a little addition to the family.

“So you think she’s pregnant?”  I bit into my cookie.

“I know.”  Her eyes twinkled.

The infamous horn made its appearance again, prompting Carol and I back into peeping.  Lori had a scowl on her face as she made her way to the sleek car.

“You think Abraham made her angry?”  I questioned though I could care less.

“Oh, I’m sure they exchanged some words.  Or her boyfriend said something to upset her.”  She added when the heavily tinted window on the Porsche didn’t roll down.  Carol was onto something there.  Lori marched to the vehicle and tapped the glass.  The door to the car opened revealing a strong arm that held it.  Lori stepped in the open space successfully blocking our view.  The suspense was killing me.

“I need to get a good look at the man, can she just move.”  I felt the same way as Carol.  This Saturday was more entertaining than just chatting about the mystery around Daryl.  Except there wasn’t a mystery surrounding him, he was just a mechanic that owned a bike store.  The vibe he had was mysterious though.

Lori moved and he was just about to exit the car when my landline rung off.  What are the chances?  I huffed and told Carol to give me a play by play.  I dashed for the phone, promising myself to invest in something cordless.

Caller ID: Simon

I groaned knowing exactly what this call was about.  I clicked call and greeted him sweetly.  “Good morning, Simon.  How are you?”

“Something tells me you’re not working on your piece since you answered this phone so quickly.”  He knew me so well.  Simon was the one who picked up my art and delivered them to galleries amongst other people.  Technically he worked for me.  It was rare for me to do my work on site.  That usually required complete discretion and a sizable check.

Carol waved her arms around drawing in my attention.  “Good lord Michonne, he isn’t homeless!”

I tried to split my attention between both Carol and Simon but it didn’t work for me.  So I focused on Simon.

“When creativity hits me I’ll be sure to text you, Simon.”  Whenever I lost momentum Simon always reminded me that I was working on a time frame.

“Be sure to.  I forgot to mention the last time I made a pick up some guy name Gregory phoned me.  He seemed adamant on talking to you.  Said it was urgent.  He sounded crazy so I shrugged it off.”  The only Gregory that rung any alarms was the ‘Atlanta Gallery’ owner who fired me with little to no remorse.  Last I heard business for him went down the drain.

“Thanks, Simon, if he calls you again let me know.”

“Sure thing.”  I hung up and made my way back to Carol who was no longer peeping out the window.  Disappointment filled me.

“I thought you were going to give me a play by play.  Did they leave?”  I checked outside the window again noticing the black car was absent.  Just my luck.

“I did but you were in the deep end of your conversation on the phone.”  She gazed at me expectantly.

Sighing I told her “Simon was just talking about my old boss calling him, said he sounded crazy.”

“Simon himself looks crazy.”

“In an artistic way Carol.”  I defended him.

The thoughts in her head were clear on her face.  It didn’t make any difference what I said.  Anyone with messy hair and an array of paint covering them looked crazy unless it was me of course.

Mike made his grand entrance, he waltzes in and rubbed himself against my leg.  Carol coughed beside me putting space between us.

“That’s my cue to leave, be sure to leave some cookies for the new neighbors.”  It wasn’t as if I was going to devour the entire pan of cookies. After closing the door behind Carol I pulled my silk night top tighter around my body.

My place was vibrant due to some of my work being hung on its white walls.  When I first moved in I wanted something modern.  I also wanted parts to remain a canvas for my doings.  I actually came across this place by accident.  It had security and it was discreet.  There was a twenty-minute drive before you came across another building.  In total there were nine occupants in the building.  Morgan, Daryl, Jessie, Glenn, and Maggie along with Negan lived on the lower level.  Abe and Sasha, Carol, myself along with the new couple lived on the second floor.  Despite the number of occupants, my place was a spacious two bedroom two bath.  I used the extra room for my work.  I was still on edge about moving in here permanently, Atlanta taught me nothing good last forever.  Sighing, I turned on my speakers and headed for my safe haven.  I worked until nightfall.

[gleefail]

Glee Memories: 1x9 Wheels

A long, long time ago, as Glee was approaching graduation in Season 3, I found myself nostalgic with some rare free time on my hands. So I decided to rewatch the series from the beginning and jot down some memories, discrepancies that have arisen since, fave quotes, tally solos - all that good stuff, strictly for shits and giggles.

8 years later (eek!) and once more I find myself with an unexpected abundance of free time. With so many revisiting or being newly introduced to the show between binge watching during Quarantine and all the tragedy that has surrounded the show since it went off the air, I figured I’d finish what I started. And by finish, I mean go through the end of S3. Cause I truly cannot acknowledge what happened after that. Except for 5B.

Kicking this off by reposting the first 15 episodes I already went through. Enjoy!

1x9 Wheels I haven’t addressed yet that this voice-over “Here’s what you missed on Glee” guy is different…will be interesting to see when they changed it.

um…when did Kurt tell everyone that he was gay? Didn’t he only come out to Mercedes and his dad so far? I definitely missed that on Glee

Holy crap. I forgot about this Cheerios jump rope number.

This is when I started not liking S1 Quinn. When she started being just plain mean to Finn even as she lied to him about the baby being his. Uncalled for. Although her calling out that he’s a peabrain is hella-necessary.

Figgins can’t pay for a bus for Artie to get to sectionals. Understandable? Is that like, legal?

Makes total sense that Sue has boosters that provide funds for traveling etc. Doesn’t make sense that the Glee club never started music boosters….not to me anyways.

Will’s right. In high school, some of the best trips were rides to other schools for volleyball games and showchoir competitions together. Although that almost always involved people mooning out the back window. And getting to third base under letterman jackets. Just my school? Anyone else?

Aw…Tina is looking at Artie from afar…not necessarily romantically…concerned? Whatever the reason, it’s cute.

Aw, Kurt’s so excited about Defying Gravity

let the record show, Mr. Schue just handed a solo to Rachel for a competition for the first time ever. But not the last. Don’t get me started.

“Don’t worry. We’ll find something for you to…dip in chocolate” Two things: 1. Yes you will. And his name is Sam Evans. (’wanky’). 2. No, you won’t Mr. Schue. No. You. Won’t. #oops

“I mean, bake sales are kind of bourgee” “So hip people stopped eating delicious, sugary treats?” “It’s not that, it’s that most of us don’t know how to bake. I find recipes confusing.” I love every moment of this exchange. And

Britany’s officially not all there now. :) Yaaaay!

Aw, poor Artie and the peer pressure of having to say he doesn’t mind when he’s clearly hurt by people he thinks are his friends. Poor guy.

It really does impress me how Kevin McHale manages to completely lose use of his legs. Even when he’s boppin in his wheelchair. I don’t think I could do it.

Jenna Ushkowitz is flat out adorable laughing at her lunch table in slow motion.

Aw Tina. These original members really do all have a lil special place in my heart. Before RIB screwed most of them over.

Ruh roh, I know that look. Mr. Schue is getting an idea watching Artie jamming around in his wheelchair…

Why is Kurt wearing a gangsta bandana on his head?

“But I’m happy to have you try out something else, Kurt. And I’ll make sure it’s got a killer high note” No. No, you won’t Schue. Ugh. Three seasons of empty promises and he won Teacher of the Year? Riiiight.

“Well, you’re irritating most of the time but…don’t take that personally”

“Preach!” Yes!!! There’s the Artie I know and love! It makes me giggle more seeing moments like this knowing he asks Amber to show him how to do it, lol.

hahahahaha – Finn just got hit in the back of the head with someone’s baseball bat! Rachel just got her lunch spilled all over her! Oh, happiness.

“it’s what I have left of my pool cleaning money. After I bought dip and numchucks” 

Quinn is so pretty in regular clothes with her hair down in season one. I would buy that THIS is the girl everyone wants to be. She’s totes that popular, bitchy girl who has everything.

“It would be pretty awesome if it came out with a Mohawk”

Aw, this food fight is still so cute. I feel like we haven’t seen Quinn laugh like that since until she was going up that ramp with Artie cheering her on. So cute.

“It’s not about a guy, is it? Cause…I’m not ready to have that conversation.” “At least you don’t have to worry about me getting someone pregnant” snicker snicker. True dat.

“You sing like a girl – in a good way”

So…yeah, they were doing Defying Gravity for Sectionals…what happened to that?

FIRST APPEARANCE OF LAUREN ZIZES!!!

Ugh. So stupid Rachel is complaining about having to audition for a solo. It’s showchoir. You should have to audition for EVERY solo and anyone who wants to can. …but it’s Glee

“We all know I’m more popular than Rachel – and I dress better than her…”

“Your right hand, Britany” *Santana whispers to her “it’s this one”* Yup. Not all there. There’s mah girl!

I love that instead of saying “I promise to vote for whoever sings the song better”, Mercedes blatantly says to Kurt “I promise to vote FOR YOU” with a big smile. I love Kurtcedes. Have I said that yet?

“Maybe one of these days you’ll find a way to create teaching moments without ruining my life.” Oh he will Rachel. He’ll just ruin everyone else’s.

“Those are what I call ‘lazy makers’”

Figgins is making Sue hold auditions to replace Quinn on the Cheerios. How do they not try out in the first place?

“and as soon as a cheerleader rolls herself out onto the field in a wheelchair she becomes decidedly less effective at cheering people up. It’s just a fact.”

“Stop attacking me. I’m sick of it” I like this Finn. Where did he come from? And where did he go?

I never ever ever realized that that was Kurt auditioning for the Cheerios with a baton. OMG!

haha, also never realized that the “freak” did the splits and clearly landed on his junk but tried to play it like he was fine. HAAAAA!

“Becky, I’m gonna stop you right there. You’re in.” YAY!

“I’m just saying, she has a point; you are kind of an idiot.” Truth.com, Puck.

“It’s just like you, with your stutter” Tina’s reaction said it all. “But I wanna be very clear: I still have the use of my penis.” HAAAAAAA!!! And Artie’s “why did I say that?!” look afterwards. Golden.

Kurt warming up to a high F while Burt gets the “your son’s a fag” phone call. So damn sad.

“Sometimes I just…I wish your mom was still around, y’know?” Aw, Burt. So happy you’ll find Carol.

“I don’t wanna win out of charity. I wanna win the solo because it’s right for the club. I really think that the judges at Sectionals will find a female version of Defying Gravity much more accessible.” Lies and manipulation and selfishness of Rachel Berry. And it begins.

“People just don’t like me.” “Yeah, you might wanna work on that” Yup. You might, Rachel. Too bad ya never really did unless it was to benefit you. hahaha, Puck put a lil pot in the cupcakes. I totally forgot about that. omg. There’s a loooot of flannel in that lunch room. What is that about?

Haha. Puck buying pot from Sandy. “The doctor said the shark fractured my spinal cord.” “This is why I don’t go to the aquarium.”

Sue’s mean don’t discriminate because of handicap, gender, religion, or sexual preference.

“You think this is hard? Try auditioning for Baywatch and being told they’re going in a different direction. THAT was hard.” Truth.

“Oh, I bully everyone, William. That’s the way I roll”

First official Diva-off!! I remember I soooo wanted Kurt to win, but it was all over his face that something was up ever since Burt told him about that phone call.

First sacrifice for Rachel Berry. Go.

Even back then when I liked Rachel Berry, I didn’t like her singing this song. I think my dislike of her started right around here. Like “who does she think she is, trying to sing this song better than Idina, when she knows damn well, coming from Broadway, who Idina is!?” that was me, lol. My point is I still don’t like her on this song. It has a special place in my heart and I need more of a powerhouse on it, and someone whose soul I can hear when they sing it, not just trying to sing pretty.

“’It’ is a ‘she’.” That’s a cute moment. :)

Ok. Ohhhhh boy. Finn got a job by pretending to be handicapped and stuck in a wheelchair. But wasn’t it Finn that 2 seasons later berates Quinn for not announcing that she’s improved to now be able to stand/walk to get votes for Prom Queen? I just…I refrain from comment. It’ll get ugly.

Aw, Artie is donating the money to get a ramp put in the auditorium instead of using it to get a bus to go to Sectionals with everyone. Way to take one for the team, Artie. He’s a good guy.

Sue donated the $600 to rent the bus for Sectionals. Aw. I knew something was up at that point. Lies. I knew something was up when she told Will “You don’t know the FIRST thing about me.”

Aw, Jean. This relationship was so sweet.

AWWWWW – Artie’s face after Tina kisses him!!!

Aw. Artie’s face after Tina admits that she’s faking her stutter. :(

“I’m sorry now you get to be normal and I’m gonna be stuck in this chair for the rest of my life. And that’s not something I can fake.” Aw, man. So sad.

“I’m just saying that I love you more than I love being a star.” Oh Kurt. You little angel.

Ok. There are no words for how I felt when I found out Glee was doing Proud Mary. Here’s the thing: Me and my theatre friends always go to karaoke and take turns singing this song. And then the rest of us kinda flash mob it and rush the stage once the tempo picks up in synchronized back-up dancing. And it’s the highlight of our night and the best tradition when we can get everyone together to do it. Once people came up and asked if we were some group of performers that the bar hired to come do it. It’s soooo much fun. It has such a special place in my heart. I do it now for warm-ups with my high school kids when we need to unwind. And I always use this Glee version. Cause I loves Amber Riley and Kevin McHale and Jenna Ushkowitz on it. Things like this are what make me sad that Glee-ers are graduating more than missing the show itself or the writing; the memories made along the way. And the things like this that just make me smile.

Lol, one of my friends loved the duplicity of them singing this. Cause it was ‘rollin’ for Artie and ‘Mary’ for Kurt. He was gay, so I guess he was allowed to say things like that cause he owned it, lol.

This number is so effing awesome. And the costumes and hair are super cute.

I love the behind the scenes of this where Cory talks about when Amber fell out of her wheelchair and he just heard a crash followed  by incessant laughing. SOLOS: Artie (2), Rachel (1), Kurt (1), Mercedes (1), Tina (1)