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#torgo gif
mst3kgifs · 1 month
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You'll start immediately, you'll work 24 hours a day, you'll live on the premises in a 3x3' closet, and you'll be paid in skunk pelts.
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astralbondpro · 10 months
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Manos: The Hands of Fate (1966) Dir. Harold P. Warren
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amatesura · 2 years
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Manos: The Hands of Fate (1966) | dir. Harold P. Warren
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bss-the-artist · 7 months
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Mst3k Motivation!
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forthegothicheroine · 2 years
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Renfield right now:
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nemospecific · 10 months
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I need to remember to bust this out more often
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“Ugh. These two…”
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atomic-chronoscaph · 2 years
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Manos: The Hands of Fate (1966)
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lynxgriffin · 2 years
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"I am Ralsei, I take care of the Castle Town while the Lightners are away"
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Wait, is this because they basically both have goat legs??
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brightlotusmoon · 1 year
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On this episode of When Fiction Punches Reality With Biting Satire:
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Professor Farnsworth: Good news, everyone! Those asinine morons who canceled us were themselves fired for incompetence.
[the crew cheers]
Professor Farnsworth: And not just fired, but beaten up, too... and pretty badly.''
[the crew cheers, somewhat less enthusiastically]
Professor Farnsworth: In fact, most of them died from their injuries.
[the crew are visibly alarmed, while Bender laughs evilly]
Professor Farnsworth: And then they were ground up into a fine pink powder.
Fry: Why?
Professor Farnsworth: Oh, it's got a million and one uses.
[he takes a can of Torgo's Executive Powder and sprinkles it in his pants]
Professor Farnsworth: Ah, that soothes the fire.
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Nudar: Sir, would you care to sign our petition?
Bender: I support and oppose many things, but not strongly enough to pick up a pen.
Nudar: That's just what the guys who oppose the things you support want you to do.
Bender: Really? Down with those guys!
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Eventually, the absurd because ordinary. It's easy to flounder under the tide and pressure of reality caving to the ridiculous.
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obscurushydrae · 7 days
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Sparkle on, it's Friday!
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cheersforrevenge · 1 year
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My Dragon
season 8 daenerys targaryen x fem knight!reader
warnings : n/a
srry this is rlly short 💕 also dany’s high valyrian is in bold!!
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Ash from the bodies and buildings of King’s Landing dusted your tied up hair. You were Daenerys’ sworn knight. You hated what happened back at King’s Landing but it had to be done. Cersei couldn’t be negotiated with.
As soon as you get halfway up the Red Keep’s stairs, you see her. Your Queen, the last dragon. Daenerys’ deep purple gaze finally meets you and she smiles.
Once, you finish climbing the stairs her hand reaches out for yours. “I had hoped as a little girl that someone would be here with me and here you are.” You were one of the only people who stuck with her from the beginning.
“I wouldn’t miss it for anything, my Queen.” You say dropping her hand and bowing. No matter how hard you try, you can’t get Dany out of your head. You couldn’t realize it but you haunted Daenerys’ thoughts. She always loved you. Ever since, you were just two girls playing as knight and princess.
“Before I claim the iron throne, I want you with me forever. You have always been at my side but I want you to be my knight. Mine… Do you understand what I’m saying?” She steps closer to you.
“Of course, my dragon.” The Mother Of Dragons is so close to you that you see the air she exhales. Suddenly, she firmly presses her lips against yours. Every little memory you have with her flashes through your head.
When she pulls back, you smile as wide as possible. Daenerys looks deeply into your eyes and grabs your hand one more time before turning towards her army.
“Blood of my blood,” Daenerys Targaryen says and the troops quiet down. “You kept all your promises to me. You killed my enemies in their iron suits. You tore down their stone houses. You gave me the Seven Kingdoms!” The Unsullied bang all of their spears three times, after every dedication and message she says.
“Torgo Nudho,” she says, addressing Grey Worm. “You have walked beside me since the Plaza of Pride. You are the bravest of men, the most loyal of soldiers. I name you commander of all my forces, the Queen’s Master of War.”
“Y/N, My sworn knight. The one who protected me from all. My one and truest love. So much of your life you have spent traveling along side me. I name you head of the Queen’s guard, the Queen’s shield.” Daenerys says turning her head and smiling at you.
“Unsullied,” Daenerys Targaryen says as Tyrion approaches the queen from behind. “All of you were torn from your mothers’ arms and raised as slaves. Now you are liberators! You have freed the people of King’s Landing from the grip of a tyrant!”
“But the war is not over. We will not lay down our spears until we have liberated all the people of the world!”
“From Winterfell to Dorne, from Lannisport to Qarth, from the Summer Isles to the Jade Sea!” This was the beginning of Daenerys Targaryen’s conquest of the whole world. Nothing would stop her now.
“Women, men, and children have suffered too long beneath the wheel. Will you break the wheel with me?” The Unsullied pound their spears in a steady beat.
Tyrion approaches the queen who catches him out of the corner of her eye.
“You freed your brother,” Daenerys says, not looking at him. “You committed treason.”
“I freed my brother,” Tyrion says. “And you slaughtered a city.”
She turns to face him. He removes his Hand of the Queen broach and throws it down the staircase, where it lands at the foot of an Unsullied soldier.
The pounding stops. She looks at her former Hand with contempt, swallows hard, and says “take him” in Valyrian. Two nearby Unsullied soldiers escort him away.
The soldier who the pin fell by, walks up to Daenerys and hands the pin to her. She looks down at the pin and says, “Thank you, soldier.”
She walks over to you. “I guess you are getting another promotion today.” Daenerys pushes the pin onto your coat.
“I will honor these positions till the day I die, my love.” You say softly grabbing the back of her neck and kissing her.
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mst3kgifs · 1 month
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mY, uhH... my rEfeRencEs...
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stumpyshocky · 1 month
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Finally watched Manos and the Hands of Fate and idk torgo is precious 👉👈🥹
I also I realized I fuxed up his hand and broke his thumb, so ignore that.
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jigensass · 5 months
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Part 1 - Video Games
Part 1 – Video Games.
The more I wrote this list, the more that I realized I played a lot of games this year. More than average.
First off, the one shot sittings.
Unpacking – made me cry 10/10.
The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog. Best April fool’s Joke ever 10/10.
Papa’s Freezeria Deluxe. 7/10 because nostalgia.
Now, let’s start off with the real shit.
Persona 4 Golden – Yes I am aware this is a 10 year old game. I don’t care.
I have known about this game this its inception, most likely due to the now defunct playthrough from Super Best Friends. But not gonna lie, the pony version of this version was way much better.
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I’ve ranted on Persona 5 so damn much but I actually enjoyed this game and the critical issues of the teenage psyche that it delved into alongside the purpose of the main villain, who I am not going to spoil. Even the mascot character was bear-able to hear because you could literally bench the guy since he didn’t become a member of your party until halfway through the game. And Teddy was never in my face on what to do and didn’t creepily live in my house. The game just gave me suggestions when important events would happen to nudge me to say ‘hey, you should probably do this thing.’ Unlike Morgana who kept saying ‘Hey, Hey. We must sleep. Do as I say and obey.’
Overall I just found it more engaging and new mechanics weren’t always being shoved down my face during every new chapter and if there were new mechanics to use, I hardly ever used them because I mostly stuck with the same four core of Yu, Yukiko, Yosuke, & Kanji. I really wish I could have had more time to play with Naoto but by the time she enters your party, the game is nearly entering the final battle and any missed content you forgot to pick up along the way.
And I obviously picked well to romance the goth girl Marie, because I got a secret ending.
Overall, solid 8/10.
Sherlock Holmes the Awakened.
So the Gigachads at Frogwares have done it again and managed to make a sequel to their prequel ambiguously gay Sherlock game and as a remake of one of their first point and click adventures where Sherlock takes on Cthulhu.
Meanwhile in the background of all this madness (and how maddeningly they played the ending to a remake be a sequel to the original), kept throwing this about.
I’m just saying, if they announce the remake for Nemesis, I will live stream it.
And for those who don’t know what Nemesis is, it’s Lupin Part 6, the way it was supposed to be.
There is a demo on steam, the game is very short due to its age and if the old puzzles frustrate you, the game has an entire guide to how to solve Lupin’s shenanigans built in. If you love old point-and-click Nancy Drew like games, you’ll like this.
Giving it a cocktease/10.
Final Fantasy XVI & Final Fantasy Crisis Core (I’m lumping these two together).
Crisis Core is…Crisis Core. It was my first time playing it and because I set it down I believe last year or when it first came out, picked it up again, and finished it in maybe two or three more sessions and a few guide reads later, it felt…eh.  It’s been a while since I’ve played it so since it really didn’t latch on to me like some further entries into the list, I would have been able to remembered some more.
However, I played FFXVI and there are only two things you need to take away from it.
The gays are winning.
Sex on the beach.
TORGO IS BEST BOI.
Cildilfus
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No really that’s it. The combat for XVI is certainly something new. And at some points, it did make me cry. But overall because the game was so small and finite, it felt…unfulfilling. I wanted to spend more time in this world to get to know these characters. Yes, I am still a bit petty that when I played the demo before I bought the game they teased that you could also play as Joshua, maybe other characters, but that never came into fruition in the final version. Which makes me believe that this game had a lot more going for it than intended.
Just like the next game on the list…
Assassin’s Creed Mirage.
This game was probably the fastest I had explored a map within one sitting. My playthroughs for FFXVI and AC Mirage were about the same length. The return to form with the old stealth mechanics was refreshing, although I only played a small bit of Valhalla and that main character drove me nuts. However, I could have cared less about the story. It was all about that sweet, sweet map exploration. The very instant I was given free reign after the tutorial, I flipped off the first objective and went off to go explore the entire map. The glaring issues of how little work went into this game showed when I just waltzed up to the final area of the game with ease or how it felt boring that to have to backtrack through the plot to get half the armor and weapon upgrades that I went out of my own way to get on my own. At that point, I just didn’t care and the ending…yeah the ending made no sense to me at all.
5/10. Very mid.
But let’s go from mid to god tier and talk about the latest Yakuza- sorry Like a Dragon game, shall we?
Like a Dragon: Gaiden – The Man who Erased his Name
AFTER 7 YEARS, HE HAS RETURNED- No wait this is Joryu Jozuma, but everyone is calling him Kiryu Kazama? WHO IS HE?
Jesus Christ I hope the people at SEGA got paid well for making this DLC into a masterpiece in six months. https://automaton-media.com/en/interviews/20231030-22625/ (link it here)
Not going to lie, this is definitely one of the better titles in the RGG franchise to date up with Yakuza 0 and the original Ishin (more on this in a bit). It’s essentially ‘Yakuza Lite’ for anyone who wants to get into the series. It’s not the best place to start if you want to get invested, but it’s a good swallow pool to get your toes wet.
The story, depending on how much you know about the series, will make you cry during the end. RGG (the studio, not the game), brought their A-game with the animations and it has been a long time coming.
Most of the fan favorite minigames are here so there’s a little bit of everything for everyone. And although most of the game does feel like busy work, which it’s a Yakuza game. The whole vibe it is supposed to give is to get you invested in something so unrelated to the main story that 40 hours later you go, ‘wait, what the fuck was I supposed to be doing again?’
And I’m not going to lie, I’m glad the finishing of the completionist list and maxing out the Akane network to level 30 being completely optional is a breath of fresh air. Because the trophy list was so easy to attain, minus a few snags here and there, I am proud to say that RGG Gaiden is my first platinum trophy on PS5.
9/10.
Meanwhile on the other hand…the meme is dead.
At the beginning of this year around February, Yakuza Ishin Kiwami dropped to the mainstream western audience, officially making it localized. I’ve already played Ishin in its prime form, so to see the state the game was in was…very depressing.
This was the first RGG game to run on the Unreal Engine and it shows that the team was not well-versed with it and the time constraints on getting the game out did not help at all. I believe this game went through six or seven patches before they said ‘enough was enough’ and just let it be.
I even broke a portion of the game on a substory with the final mail delivery race. What happened is that I took a different path than the AI so he went off screen and sooner or later I realized I was kicking his ass. Upon further investigation, I noticed that he had gotten stuck in a loop on a bridge, which was not supposed to happen.
OH AND THE AUDIO BALANCING WITH THE NEW VOICE LINES IS REALLY GOOD WE SWEAR!
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Just go find a copy of OG Ishin on Ebay or somewhere. I can hardly read Japanese and still had a good time. I did not have a good time with the clunky combat, the necessity of using the tropper cards (I never used them in my original playthrough in Ishin, why should I have to use them NOW? Shinada card OP.)
6/10. – Because Majima’s lines are obviously re-used, unlike Kiryu’s who got to have most, if not all of them, re-dubbed.  
Ace Attorney Spirit of Justice.
It took me so long, but I did it. Coincidentally, right around the second trilogy announcement for consoles came about. I sat down and played the current final game in the Ace Attorney series.
And what did I think of it?
Well, it’s a mess that is for sure. That fourth cock tease of a trial with Athena may or may not be getting her own game soon…eventually… is possibly the worst case in the entire series. And no, it’s not just because of this is the case that gave the internet the sheer thought of…………….clussy. It was boring, bland, uninteresting, and there were no stakes or ingenuity to use your brain to solve the case.
Apollo? Trans? High probability. I didn’t feel any kind of deep connection to what was going on and the plot twist at the end was…too be honest kind of dumb. Like in the…’oh you had no idea but look at this cool thing we did so it feels kind of empty’ rather than how I felt when it hit me like a truck about the obvious plot twist with Bridge to the Turnabout did. Listen I’m just linking HBomberGuy’s video on Sherlock because the analogy of the 12 hour trial and Bridge to the Turnabout are identical to Moffat’s Sherlock and the OG Sherlock serials. It was his idea first.
Really the only thing I can remember is the one post I made that popped off about Athena calling out Apollo for being flustered about Klavier.
Speaking of posts that popped off…
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8. Obey Me! Nightbringer (aka dear god why do I make terrible decisions with my life).
So, the gacha otome game that ruined my life last year is getting a sequel prequel!
I’m not going to play it! The gameplay will probably be just more of the same-
It’s a rhythm game.
It’s. a. rhythm. game.
*audible screaming*
ANYWAY SO NINE MONTHS AND ABOUT TEN THOUSANDS ANALYSIS POSTS ABOUT HOW EVERYONE IN THIS GAME IS AWFUL- (no I’m not joking. I’ve analyzed Lucifer like I analyzed Jigen and dare I say this man is more akin to my inner struggles than Jigen will ever be.)
Don’t worry, the money spending has been a lot more sparse and comes in giant dumps during events of a card that I want rather than a consistent cash flow since the game is more of a way to have fun rather than a way to escape humanity. Due to how much my workload has becoming, I’ve just gone down from playing daily to just playing weekly to play the new story chapters. I’m probably just going to do the bare minimum to get anything out of the Christmas event (the plot is so silly it made me laugh, ngl).
Because the story is ongoing and my opinion on some characters has changed drastically over the course of the last week. I’m just going to make a tier list of how I feel the story have been IN ACCORDANCE TO THEIR ACTIONS. (mild theory spoilers) as well as how I actually see the characters.
PLOT OPINION
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CHARACTER OPINION
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Overall the game is enjoyable when it takes itself seriously.
But now we must address the elephant in the room aka the big star of this year’s game list?
WHY THE ACTUAL FUCK DO I HAVE 250 HOURS IN AMERICAN TRUCK SIMULATOR?
NO REALLY.
(btw add me on Steam, it means you actually read this disaster piece)
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I don’t know what it is with this game just driving around in a big rig blaring country music is so…cathartic. It just makes me hate people in cars even more. If anything, this sparked my love for crappy 90’s country music to a spike. I admit it, it’s a guilty pleasure of mine. This is my guilty pleasure game. And judge me for it all you want. My inbox is obey.
But let’s get serious. I was going to just…ignore this game despite… THIS being the release showcase. This is how I initially found about this long game that had been in development and beta testing for many years beforehand. And don’t lie, this is probably how most people found out about it too.
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But someone told me that the VA from Sherlock Chapter One was doing some of the moaning during the sex scenes and I just hopped onto the train
Of Baldur’s Gate 3.
I had absolutely no idea what I was getting myself into (I started playing around launch in late August, right around Hotfix #3 with the mirror came out). I knew next to nothing of the main lore of the Forgotten Realms universe, but my knowledge with D&D from college was basic, at best. And I was going to quit playing the game because I really did not like the constant top-down view camera. Until a co-worker, who was also playing said, ‘you know you can move that camera, right?’ So I came back, plugged in my PS4 controller into my computer and I was off to the races.
That was until when I went to go free up some space on my computer, this fucking piece of shit game nearly bricked my damned PC and I saved it with patience and by the grace of fucking Mystra herself because I deleted MY ENTIRE USER FOLDER LIKE AN IDIOT
Disclaimer: I have yet to finish the game because this is an OC simulator, I still want to play the Origin characters, as well as the Durge playthrough. Which, depending on how you play, is THOUSANDS OF HOURS of CONTENT. And there is just so many options and how you can go about things as well as that random chance of RNG.
I currently have four OC campaigns. I have not even touched the sheer tip of the iceberg. Azazel, the buff High Elf Bard who is fucking Halsin. Donna, the sorcerer Luna, the Wood-Elf Druid Burrito, the human warlock. (This is by far the craziest playthrough so far)
I am also writing this after the game awards so congrats to Larian for getting the sweep they deserved. All the other games that were nominated this year were just a blip on the radar compared to what BG3 was doing. The gameplay is not innovative outside of the world of D&D, but they hit a homerun with all of the story that is crammed into this game and did it so well that they continued to update the game MONTHS after the open release with change of life styles and multiple bug fixes that many players enjoyed.
Also all of the voice actors are beautiful. They all did a fantastic job with their work. But you know who this is about now.
(I go looking for one specific video and I find this fucking piece of gold while the game was still in beta access.)
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Yes we are going to be talking about Astarion (or for me at first it was A-‘stair’-ion).
What do I think of him? Since I have seen many posts going around that apparently a portion of the fan community cannot separate between actor and the art. I made this meme.
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Yes, Neil is a very precious man and deserves more work in the industry after his spring board with Astarion. I do not associate him with Astarion outside of their voices because I hate to love Astarion. The man is a fucking slut of a PROSECUTOR. He would make Miles Edgeworth jealous because he took his husband of an attorney and would make Klavier Gavin foam at the mouth at his sense of style is 10000x better than his. He would be slaying in the courtroom ALL THE TIME.
Astarion is the devil on every player’s shoulder that goes ‘yeah we could be goody-two shoes but is that fun? No, no it isn’t. Spill some blood, just for me kitten.’ And you wouldn’t hesitate to do it.
My bard, Azazel, who was mostly aligned with good, had a neutral relationship with Astarion going into Act 3. Astarion at this point was EVERYONE’S Devil and I blame him for Gale getting into deeper shit with Mystra than he already had been. Azazel would always listen to what Astarion would had to say, but never would be drag along with his shenanigans, despite keeping him around to use as a distraction to try multiply times to steal 10 scrolls of dimension door from the wizard shop in Baldur’s Gate. Did I do? Fuck yes I did. Was it worth it? Hell yes it was.
MEANWHILE, I’m currently going through the game as well, me, as a human warlock. And let me tell you, this game will show you what kind of person you actually are. And truth be told, I’m a decent person, but will go the shady route to get things done. I almost ALMOST sided with Minathra based on looks alone until I found out she sounded like a crazed member of the Alt-Right and was going to also kill the refugees. I pissed some kids off, lied, stole, but somehow in the name of Mystra, just because I fed Gale some magic items and heard him out did he instantly rise to ‘excpetional’ status without me even realizing it. He instantly became an incel because you guessed it, some white-haired vampire seduced me into sleeping with him and THEN the githyanki because I helped HER out of her problems wanted to sleep with me. THEN THE VAMPIRE found out I was sleeping with the githyanki, and told me ‘it’s either me or the gith’.
It was a hard decision: Being stepped on, or good sex.
Obviously I chose the latter. Because I’m a sucker. Though I really do wish I could let this go on.   
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Manos: The Hands of Fate | 1966
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alecsv · 2 years
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