#understands the worry and stress that his friends or Jazz dont get

[silvercrystalwhump]

Silence and Milkshakes

TW: dehumanizing whumpee, General bbu warning, implied past noncon, tired and stressed boy

The engine of the old, filthy truck hums with a low drone; something clicks around in the hood. It could be nothing, or it could be something terrible. Flynn isn’t planning on checking it now. It is a nice distraction from the aching throb in his side. Silently, he rubs his fingers on the worn leather steering wheel, just barely cooler than the surface of the sun. When he first bought this car, he hated the way the leather stuck to his hands and made driving a lifetime commitment, but now it only resonates warmth through the calluses of his fingers.

The radio is turned down; it broke and is now stuck on an old jazz station saturated in static. Flynn can tell what the artist is through the grinding of the static, he thinks it’s Miles Davis, but Flynn was more likely to guess the winning lottery numbers than guess the song currently playing. Flynn taps lightly on the brake as he approaches a light. Yellow lights glare down at him from its pole. As the car rolls to a stop, Flynn glances at his passenger seat.

Kai is sitting there. Yesterday, Flynn gave him one of his hoodies for comfort while he was at school. Unfortunately, the high school hoodie permanently acquired the faint smell of cigarette smoke years ago. Kai sits as straight as a nail, eyes at his feet. His hands are perfectly still on his lap.

Position 3.

Flynn presses on the gas, and the car lurches forward. His eyes go back to the road, but his thoughts stay on the box boy. He had read up on some information about box boys from WRU’s website. They are people who signed over their rights to get better, happier lives. Flynn keeps himself from scoffing at the thought. Happier lives, Kai looks like he’s seen some horrible stuff. Hell, he’s been traumatized to the point of muteness. Flynn had triple-checked his medical records for anything that would render him mute, but he found nothing.

Why willingly put yourself through that?

Flynn pulls into a small section of town, and he drives the car into a Chick-fa-la drive-through. He wants something in his stomach before he goes and lifts bricks all day from some rich guy. His eyes trail back to Kai, “Do you want anything bud?”

Kai’s bright green eyes look at him. For a moment, Flynn thinks that he’s not going to respond. But, instead, Kai tilts his head slightly, strands of silky red hair fall across his face. Some deep inside Flynn, a side of him twisted by the horror he lives with every day, understands why someone would buy a little box boy like Kai.

So tiny, adorable.

Flynn curses himself and says, "Do you want a milkshake?"

Kai nods silently. His thin fingers pull at the shorts Flynn gave him a week ago. Flynn pretends not to notice; Kai seems to panic when he does.

"Wjat flavor?"

Kai blanks again. Green eyes looking wide at the menus that glow in the early morning light. His eyes grow distant, and he just looks back at Flynn.

Flynn sights and raises a hand. Kai flinches, Flynn pretends to ignore it. Then, he holds up a finger, "Can you hold up fingers?"

Kai nods. The tiny box boy is as tense as hardwood cut against the grain.

"Okay, one for vanilla, two for chocolate, and three for cookies and cream."

Flynn watches the gears turn in Kai’s head. Three pale fingers raise for a second before shooting back to his thigh. Flynn gives Kai a warm smile as he pulls around to the speaker.

As Flynn orders, he sees Kai shift in his seat. Kai pulls his knees into the hoodie and tries to hide his nose in his knees. Flynn notices the boy shivering, and once he finishes ordering, he leans into the partial backseat and pulls out an old quilt.

"I know it's chilly bud, the heat doesn't work in this car," Flynn says as he wraps the quilt around Kai's body. Kai looks with wide eyes at Flynn. He seems to lean into Flynn's touch, no matter how brief the contact.

The drive over, and Flynn hands the woman cash and grabs the food. He sets in it the cup holder area and pulls out. As he drives, he gives the milkshake to Kai. The box boy gingerly takes the cup and holds it. His eyes on Flynn, the entire time, waiting in his eyes.

"That's yours Kai, you can drink it."

Kai instantly puts the straw in his mouth and tries to suck down all of the liquid. Almost immediately, he regrets it. Flynn holds back a chuckle, "You can't drink it so fast Kai you'll get a brain freeze."

Kai blinks at the drink and puts the straw back in his mouth, this time drinking slower. Flynn tosses a chicken mini into his mouth, and he keeps driving.

He drives mindlessly for a few lights until Kai sneezes, ripping him back to reality.

At a red light, Flynn looks over at Kai. He put the milkshake into a cup holder and is now quietly sleeping against the seat belt. Flynn smiles subconsciously and then memories of a few nights ago.

He had awoken to Kai sleeping against his chest. Flynn shoved him aside in a panic and freaked the little guy out. Guilt gnawed at his throat all day after that.

Kai has not tried to touch him since.

Flynn swears under his breath. Why did he put him? There were so many ways to handle that, and you chose aggression.

Why am I so much like my father?

Flynn shoves those thoughts aside. Now wasn't the time for self-loathing; he had the stuff to do. He needs to drop Kai off at Chloe’s and get to work. Gritting his teeth, Flynn pulls through onto one of the highways near his home.

Usually, he wouldn't mind leaving Kai home by himself. Since he got home before his Father, Kai stayed in his room, so even if he did, he would be fine. Not today.

His Dad will have his drinking buddies over to watch the game tonight. Flynn rubs his thumbs across the leather of the steering wheel, anxiety crawling up his spine.

Dad expects him to cater to his friends.

One of those friends is Morrie Mitchell.

Flynn holds back a gag as he pulls into the shopping district of the town. A small bakery with its backlights on sits off to the right. Flynn, with white knuckles, pulls into the back parking.

Putting the car in park, Flynn sets his head on the steering wheel. Bile rises in his throat, but Flynn bites it back.

Hands, he can feel ghost and across his back. The man's voice is a specter across his mind, whispering twisted sweet nothings. He wants to hide away from a voice and hands that are not there.

Tap tap.

Flynn rips his head up and locks eyes with Worried dark eyes. He sighs and opens the door; Chloe stands out in the dawn light. The golden light crosses her face and makes her skin look like golden chocolate.

"Sorry," Flynn says, "I'm just out of it this morning."

Chloe smiles, "Not an issue, I have coffee inside if you want some."

Flynn nods, "Yeah, thanks."

Hopping out of the car, he walks over to the car’s passenger side and opens the door.

Kai stirs. He wakes up and looks at Flynn, confusion and worry across his face.

"Hey bud," Flynn says calmly, "Chloes going to watch you while I'm at work today."

Chloe walks up behind him and wakes at Kai. Flynn guides Kai out by the hand. Kai hops out of the car and lands next to Flynn. Chloe looks down at Kai’s hands and says, "Hd drew on his hands."

Kai freezes and starts to shake. Flynn mentally curses and tries to soothe him, "Its alright bud, it's okay."

Flynn reaches into the car and grabs Kai’s milkshake. Then, leaning into the back of the truck, his fingers wrap around an old math notebook. He hands both to Kai and says, "How about the draw in here okay?"

Kai nods profusely, his eyes begging out apologies. Flynn guides Kai towards the bakery.

Chloe trots out in front of them and opens the door. She steps into a sitting area in the back for the staff that's linked to the pantry.

"I explained the situation to Ma as you explained to me and she's perfectly fine with him staying here."

"Thank you Chloe," Flynn yawns, "I seriously cant thank you enough."

Chloe smiles, "Dont mention it."

She turns to Kai, who holds his things in a death grip, "How are you Kai."

Kai just steps behind Flynn and inches as close to him as possible.

"He doesn't speak," Flynn says softly as he leads Kai over to the worn couch, "He'll listen to you though."

"Mute or nonverbal?"

"I don't know, he just doesn't talk."

Kai sips on his milkshake and bundles in both the quilt and the jacket.

Flynn walks towards the door and pulls out his wallet. Before he can pull out a twenty, Chloe shakes her head, "Flynn, you and I both know you need every penny, see this as a favor from a friend."

"Are you sure, I really don't want to put a burden on you all."

Chloe gives Flynn a look worth an entire essay; we both know you'll need it to escape.

Flynn pierces his lips and nods. He turns back to Kai and says gently, "You can draw back here; let Chloe know if you need anything.

Kai nods sleepily.

Flynn turns to Chloe, "Just remember to give him lunch around noonish and check on on him every so often, if you show him where stuff is hell usually take care of himself."

"Aye aye captian."

Flynn chuckles and waves to Kai. Kai blinks back at him and continues drinking his milkshake.

Flynn hops in his car and drives off to work. But, he still could not stop thinking about Kai.

[theyrejustadream-away]

Soulmate!Jimin

Park Jimin; fluff

Happy late birthday Jimin! We love you! 

Word count: 1769

Alright yall welcome to my first official bullet scenario

Let’s see how this goes

Ok anyways

It’s Jimin’s birthday and I wanna do something special for him

I hope he gets better,, i know it isn’t serious but still

And the whole soulmate AU is something i love wholeheartedly and i want to write one

Let’s get it (imagine jungkook saying that)

So Jimin’s a junior in college

Jimin is pretty well known on campus for his dancing and although he isn’t as outgoing or social as Taehyung or Jungkook, he still is pretty popular

Mainly because he’s hot but

So being a junior, he basically knows most of the “secrets” on campus

Like where to hang out, study, eat breakfast, you name it and he’ll tell you

Oh yeah he’s such a sweetheart

Will walk you to where you need to go if it’s dark out

Carries your books if you look like you’re about to drop them

The whole “prince charming” deal, it’s understandable if hordes of girls chase after him

Who wouldnt, right?

Welp with the creation of the Soulmate System, it sorta gets rid of the idea of unnecessary crushes

Which seems sad BUT it reduces heartbreak and all the sad stuff that comes from failed relationships

So the way it works is that everyone has a black rectangle on the inside of their left wrist

And everytime they speak to their soulmate, the rectangle gets lighter and lighter until you can read the name

Of course there are flaws and your soulmate might have a different person on their wrist or you just never end up meeting them

But we aren’t gonna talk about that, this is going to be a happy one!!

Back to Jimin

As i was saying, he always knows what places to hit up

And of course, the only way to know this is if he goes there himself

One day, he finished his last class of the day and stepped outside only to get hit with a strong gust of wind and a sudden chill

Its F A L L

Which means cafes!! Warm drinks!! Sweaters!!

Once he composes himself and fixes his hair, he starts wandering through the city surrounding his college

After drifting from place to place, he finally spots a small coffee shop that’s hidden by a fancy department store

Like it’s literally right next to the store but it’s so minimalistic that you just dont really notice it

But he does!!

So he goes in and he’s just met with warmth and soft piano melodies coming from above and the smell of something sweet in the oven and he just melts

This is exactly what he needs

Walking up to the counter, he looks at the menu and decides to get something simple

Because if this place cant make a good cappuccino then it fails in his eyes

Speaking of eyes

As he was collecting his change from the cashier, you just happened to walk in for your shift

And boy did his heart do a weird thing in his chest and he just couldnt take his eyes off of you

Honestly you were just in your uniform (white button down, navy apron, dark pants, hair up) and not in the best of moods because you may or may not have forgotten to turn on the alarm and was late for your first class

Always double check your alarms friends

Basically you were just not looking your best at the moment

But did Jimin think that?

N O PE

The poor boy almost left his wallet at the counter because he just couldnt stop looking at you

Although that may sound creepy at first, it was more of a ‘who is this angel in front of me’ stare with eyes bright and shining to the point where it was just endearing

That didnt stop the person behind him from coughing and letting him know that there is a full line right behind him ohmygod jimIN MOVE

You, on the other hand, didn’t notice a thing and went to your station where you made drinks and call out people’s names and all that jazz

He picked a seat near the back of the cafe after he ordered, where he had a view of everything

And by everything, i mean you

“She’s so pretty wow i want to talk to her but what if she thinks im weird??? What would i even say? How would i eve-”

“Jimin? Your order is ready”

“Ohmygod she said my name what do i do??”

“Jimin? Is there a Jimin here?”

“Ye-Yes!”

His voice cracks and he feels his face heat up

Gone is the charming and confident Jimin

Hello to the shy and clumsy Jimin

The poor boy almost spills his drink because he’s nervous and his voice already cracked and you’re giggling

Bless your soul for trying to hide it behind your hand and spare him the embarrassment

But you laughing isn’t helping because now he’s even more red and thinking ‘wow your laugh is so cute can you literally get any more adorable’

“Does coffee make you this nervous?”

“No, it’s the cute girl giving it to me”

He’s thankful that he didn’t embarrass himself anymore and somewhat recovered

Because now you’re the blushing one (he’s still a little pink from before but he decided he enjoys seeing you flustered more than anything)

Eventually he had to leave because wow it’s late and he still has homework to do

So he sadly walks out, taking a glance at where you were working but you were busy with another customer so you didn’t see him look at you

BUT he comes back almost everyday just to see you

It does a number on his wallet but hey, who needs money when you’re in college, right?

I’m kidding being a college kid is so expensive ohmygod

Everytime he comes by, he always tries to make you blush or laugh

Maybe at the same time

He just wants to get to know you better because you’re a really sweet person and he has this urge to hold your hand or hug you or kiss you but he pushes it down

At the same time, the mark on the inside of his wrist has been getting lighter and lighter

He can faintly make out the name hidden and he oh so desperately wants it to be you

You, on the other hand, could read the name on your wrist

Guess what?

It says Jimin!

You were so happy the day you found out

And when you saw him the next day you were just !!!!!!!

But he didn’t say anything about it.. Not even a small hint to let you know he knew

So you were confused

Did he just not like you in that way?

Or even worse

What if you weren’t his soulmate?

You confided in your best friend once you got back home after seeing him

“He didn’t even mention the mark? What if it isn’t my name?”

“Does he know your name?”

“..I think he does?”

“Wait how are you not sure??? Haven’t you guys been talking for a month now?”

A few days passed and Jimin still doesnt know your name

But his wrist says ‘Y/N’ and he can’t remember anyone with that name

So he decides that today is the day he’ll ask you for your name

Because he’s also worried that he isnt your soulmate

You knew his name already, and if he was destined to be yours why hadn’t you told him?

Did you not like him?

He kept stressing over it for hours on end and his roommate finally told him to go out and ask

Although it was just to stop Jimin from pacing around their shared dorm and making his roommate dizzy from all his sudden movements

And being Jimin, he dresses up and styles his hair

To be honest, if you hadn’t already fallen for him then you definitely did when he walked through the doors

“If your man taking you out on a date, he looks hOT”

“Jackson shut up i swear i’m going to spill hot coffee on yo- hi Jimin!”

It all goes according to plan at first

He hasn’t embarrassed himself or had his voice crack

He goes and waits near you, and since there weren’t many customers you could talk to him without having another cranky customer yell at you

looking at you, old man who came in and ordered hot water. who even does that what it wrong with you

You were still a little upset that he hadn’t mentioned anything about his mark

But you acted as if nothing was wrong

So when he just says “What’s your name?” without even saying hi, your heart sort of knew what was going to happen before you did

It started beating faster and a smile was threatening to show but before you did anything dumb, you answered

“y/n… why?”

And he gives the brightest smile, like the Sun can fight me because Jimin’s smile outshines it in this very moment

“Because I think you’re meant to be mine”

Cue the various aww’s coming from your coworkers and that sweet old couple who’s been shipping the both of you ever since Jimin brought you a lily he saw on his way that ‘reminded him of you’

Jackson also starts screaming a little and jumping because finally you two pieced it altogether

Jackson knew ever since you asked him about your whole dilemma because once you took a sick day and he ended up talking to Jimin

And coincidentally saw Jimin’s wrist and went :D

But he couldn’t say anything because he wanted the both of you to reach that conclusion on your own

Still, it was really obvious that there was something there

Back to Jimin and you,,

As soon as he said that you ran around the counter and tackled him in a huge hug

Jimin didn’t see that coming but he caught you in time and he sort of stumbled back but who cares because ohmygod he finally gets to hug you

This is all he’s been dreaming of

He feels so warm and soft and smells a little like peppermint and you can hear his heart beating just as fast and yours and his whole body is shaking with laughter because he really can’t do anything other than smile and laugh

He’s hugging you tightly and everything felt right in the world

Jimin found his other half and you found yours too!

hope you enjoyed <3

[adore-ahh]

h

i miss you so much. i'va had so many things to say, so much kuwento, but no one to share it with... i don't know if you'll understand this, but there are just somethings i can only say and share with certain people. in this case, you. so many problems, frustrations, little joys, even the most mundane things, i can only share it with you. you might be thinking, maybe one day i'll be able to share it with others, there are so many great people in this world, my world, why you then. well its not that easy. it is so far from easy. right now, i barely have a backbone of my own. it's so hard to keep myself up. sure you might say i have  other "friends", but they fail to [connect with me. like really connect with me. i know they try, but it's hard to when i'm not part of the main life their living. i'm juxt a side quest. something that just comws up when it does. i don't matter as much as other people do in theor lives or i don't hold as much presence. why would i anyway......

in my head, you could say that i still might think you're my best friend. my mind and heax is just so confuswd right now. so broken. i dont know what to think anymore. it's hard to think for myself. especially since no one is really telling me anything, no one can make sense of me becauxe so far other haven't encountered  or dealt with someone like me before. i'm going to be honest, you sre one of the biggest reasons why i'm so "shattered". whether you axknowledge that or don't, i still know you did something really bad. our relationship has grown to become unhealthy. i'm trying so SO hard to fix this. i really am! but all of that work is going to be wasted if you don't want to.  i can't say anything about your take on this. i can't because you never tell me anything anymore. all i really know is that you're hesitant. i don't expect you to go from 1 to 100 right away. ì've said this before, but i feel like you forgot. i want to take it slow. build something new from thw rubble left from what we had. i just feel like it's so irresponsible to just leave me in the dark. you treated me so bad and now you know what happened to me because of that. i don't even know if you feel bad. i need closure, i think we both do. then maybe i'll be able to have a little more peace in my life.

it's so important to me to have someone like you by my side. you actually wanted to be friends with me and you worked for it...  that was totally unheard of to me before because i was never really wanted. you made me feel wanted. and all that jazz.  you wanted to talk to me, you would apprach me, call me, hang out with me. you were the only one who ever did that. you were my realest friend. you understood things no one else did, you understood my humor, gosh you'd even laugh at my jokes. that's really special to me. you gave me a place to rest, a place where i could be myself. no one ever did. now i'm just stating things that was new to me because of you. i don't expect you to do the same.... but it would be nice if someone came around to do that. now since that's practically nonexistent in my life now, i just wallow in my own head. stuck with my own thoughts, frustrations, problems, fears, sadness. i have no outlet to pour it all out. they're all just stacked up waiting to overflow, waiting unti i just explode.  you made me feel really special, there are others that did the same, but what did they do? they all left me. i am not exaggerating at all. they all really did leave, without any notice and without any regard for how i'd feel.

i wanted, and still want, to be there in the same way for you. i guess i'll never know if my efforts actually payed off.... i know we both went through a lot. i still wonder why you didn't give me a second chance. i guess you tried to explain, but i just find ot kind of unfair because you stopped opening up to me. i didn't know what i was doing, you never told me how it affected you. i know it's hard to open up to me now, it's just that back then... you know what, never mind, that part is stupid, just like me.

we made a lot of plans back then. it gave me a lot of hope. now there's so little hope to hold on to. i'm just so stuck in the past and so worried aboyt the future. it has made things so hard for me in the present because i don't know what to make of it. you know, it's nice when i'd hear songs or watch people talking about how they went through a really tough time and got through it. but there's one big problem, they always talk aboht how they luckily have great friends and a good support system. i don't have that anymore. i guess that was why  i got through things in the past, but now i'm always just stuck alone in the dark. i'm just a burden to everyone. i'm always ready to give back and be there for others, but....  there's no one for me to be there for in a way that i need them. i have always took into consideration of how others would feel (though i lnow i sometimes get carried away and forget), i'd do my best to respond on the best way possible. but there has been no one else who would do the same for me. even when i'd they to inspire change, it never works. especially with you... one of the worst and most painful feelings in the world is finding out and knowing that someone has given up on you. someone special thought it was better to just give up on what was built and leave you be, clueless without explanation. Abandonment. something i'm all too familiar with and something i could never get used to. one of my biggest fears (maybe two, i guess) is isolation and exclusion.

now so many things are coming up, like fair, xp, prepprom, and prom. all i can imagine myself doing is just be there all alone or just not going. i spent the last 2 fairs + pyra with you, xp is such a wild card, and prom is just a disaster, i don't know what to do with any of them. i hate being alone and fweling isolated. i already know that's what'z going to happen with all of those events. i mean like you saw me in intrams. i was miserable. i hated it. and prom.... i have no idea who i'm seated with and it is stressing me out so much. i wanted to be seated with people i'm remotely "friends" with or at least really acquainted with. then i relle messages me this "Hi cielo!! Just informing u guys that calista will be staying with you guys for prom!! Thanks so much for your cooperation!!". i czn't take it anymore. i just AAAAAHHAHHHH

the deeper and deeper i fall into this endless pit, the more i lose interest in the things i love and enjoy, i'm slowly losing myself. the more i look at myself in the mirror, the more i wonder if i will really become something, the more i try to figure out how not to be nothing. but at the end i'm always left blank. blank mind, no thoughts. it's a cycle. i'm slowly turning into nothing. it hurts me so much to say this, but the girl you fell in love with 2 years ago seems like more and more of a dream or fantasy. it's hard to imagine that i was that person. i forgot what it was like to be genuinely happy. lost sight of it. i miss it... i don't know if i deserve it. the more and more i believe myself everyday when there's no one to help me pick up my borken pieces slowly shattering.  no one bothers to help me pick up the pieces, not like in the movies and songs.

anyway, i'm ranting now. the point is, whatever happened in the past happened. we have to acknowledge it and accept it. i'm tryuing my best to. i'm trying to communicate with you but i don't even know if i'm getting through you because you are neither acknowledging me nor replying. and that's really important to me. i want to start over. as i said earlier, i want to build our relationship again, slowly. learned from the past and use it in the present. i can't lose you, i just can't.

i hope your trip is going great so far, enjoy it:)

[hatohouse-blog]

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Snapchat 4 Ferne McCann posed for a close-up selfie while wearing a bikini In a new Snapchat shot, Ferne can be seen flashing the flesh in a skimpy pale blue bikini. The reality staris proudly wearing a necklace made from coconut leaves, whichwas crafted for her by a staff member at their hotel. Telling fans about the art of holiday pictures, Ferne said:Arth is having a lovely day today, because today is all about taking photos of me. Instagram 4 Ferne has told her Twitter followers that she is in paradise When you go on holiday with the girls, its just a level of understanding that youre going to want outfit photos. Boys dont really get it. It takes a good 15 minutes to get one good photo and he just doesnt understand. Ferne McCann and boyfriend Arthur Collins get snap happy in the Maldives Ferne has also shared a video of a series of photo booth snaps that were taken in the couple's hotel. She said: "Epic fail. Where has the top of Arthur's head gone?" Laughing, Ferne adds: "Arthur has got his eyes closed. Look at the top of Arthur's head!" Instagram Ferne and Arthur posed up a storm on a romantic fishing trip Another snap, shared onInstagram, show's Ferneand Arthur on a boattrip. She simply captioned the shot: "Sunset fishing." Ferne is puckering up to a large inflatable swan in one holiday pic, while wearing a frilly black and white polka dot bikini.

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