#urheilucast

[hockey-finns]

so what I gathered from today’s urheilucast episode is:

- jere and pekka had a half year whatsapp bromance before they met

- they have also been spooning at the cabin

- jere says it’s nice to spoon with such big guy and that pekka has been protecting him from all the bad things

- jere says pekka’s calves are thicker than his thighs (and pekka answers he has gazelle calves)

- the group has had deep conversations about life while wine drunk

- jere made $40k in OF during december

- jere has also shown his OF videos to pekka (and pekka said they are great entertainment)

- jere said they are going to make more OF content and it’s going to be even dirtier (he tried to get pekka to be his dick stunt double)

- and now esko is trying to get pekka to join jere’s OF (the plan was to have some kind of passionate sauna session and with pekka only in his hockey groin protector)

- they are also talking as if jere is sitting in pekka’s lap the whole podcast

- in their last game jere’s legs were tired so he was bending over, but now the others think it’s because he wanted to be whipped (which had apprently happened already before??)

- then esko added that jere has been repeatedly saying ’kipu kiihottaa’ (’pain turns me on’) throughout the weekend

- to which jere replies that he is a bit of a masochist and that he gains happiness and feels alive when he gets beaten up

- also apparently the whipping made him to start scoring goals in the hockey game

- lastly they accidentally stole a bottle of soda from some random little kids at the store but the kids contacted jere through ig and he went to return the soda

[jeres-red-g-string]

häärijä via Ig stories😂

bojan who? I only know kojan😩

[puuta-heinaa]

Happy final days of Käärijä's social media break to all those who celebrate. For no reason at all I have Albertville 1992 Winter Olympic's stamp in my collections, and I was inspired.

[mrgintsu]

Made a little summary of the Urheilucast - Friendship episode and all things Jere related. It's a bit chaotic and hopefully not too unclear, but maybe this gives an idea what's happening in it until somebody makes a proper translation

Edit. Also I did this while pretending to work so I might revise this later and fix some stuff. Sorry

[koppitules]

Käärijä in Urheilucast talking about spanking, being a masochist and being under? top? of Pekka Rinne. If you haven’t listened to any of the UC clips yet please listen to this it’s fucking insane

koppitules translation masterthread (open in browser)

[badhockeymom]

They went there. Deep.

So as you know, Jere "Käärijä" Pöyhönen and Pekka Rinne played for the Urheilucast team on the pond hockey tournament Rukan Pipolätkä. They, along with another podcaster Antti Meriläinen, were special guests on an Urheilucast podcast episode recorded in Ruka and out today, Monday 22nd January 2024.

This is how it started:

UC host Esko: How's it been spooning with Peksi, he's large, a 195 cm tall ex-star-goaltender; isn't it quite a safe place to sleep?

Jere: It really is, and I must say that Peksi has protected me from all bad things and been a father figure all other ways, too.

Antti Meriläinen: I must say about your spooning: it must have been a surprise to Jere, too, that Peksi who has been rejecting (pucks) his whole career, never turned you down but welcomed you right away with open arms. There's something beautiful in that.

Pekka: Yes, and recording this episode in each other's lap, it's nice.

Esko: I like that when Peksi is the bottom one, holding us all, we are like in this nest built for us. We're like baby birds here, that Peksi feeds with his fatherly touch. We have the easy position here.

Pekka: This is indeed a kind of a big cup.

Antti: Yes. And here you can feel the way a bird can sometimes sit on a branch, if you know what I mean. It feels good.

***

And how it went on: Jere inviting Pekka to be a guest star on his OnlyFans next summer.

[drugsforaddicts]

📷: Urheilucast

[ere-na]

Jere's butt posting on OF was just a bat signal to find someone who wants to spank him huh.

[nanoa1foryou]

I’d like to thank Esko ”Urheilujätkä” Seppänen for making those OF jokes on his podcast with Jere back in January. We couldn’t have done it without you.

[raapija]

Jere featured on Urheilucast's instagram story, 13.6.2023

[musicalislife]

Little dance before the show🥰

Video from @urheilucast instagram story 2023.08.04.

[jeres-red-g-string]

urheilucast via IG stories😭

[puuta-heinaa]

I love this event for him. He has friends around him. He gets to ski in good company. He even has afterski and sauna. And then he gets to PLAY AGAINST THESE GUYS; (cw butts)

i bet it's a humbling experience for him to meet people who are as crazy (and exhibitionists) as him — either that, or he thinks he needs to up his game. Which, please no, we're already tired.

Screencaps from Urheilucast's insta stories.

[caixxa]

Tomorrow!!

[badhockeymom]

Artturi Lehkonen @Urheilucast

This is old news now, from June 30, 2022, but the feels of @artturi-lehkynen ‘s fic made me go back to check out the finnish podcast episode where Artturi Lehkonen (who is friends with the podcaster Esko Seppänen) popped in for a twelve-minute phone interview.

Quick translation below, all the errors are mine. Long post!

Esko (Host): I usually think that nobody should ever be called in the middle of a Stanley Cup celebration, but this is an exception because the Cup is coming to Turku. Artturi Lehkonen, Denver, can you hear me?

Artturi: I can hear you well. [voice very groggy]

E: How’s your voice? Have you been singing, have you worn your suit jacket without a shirt, how fit are you feeling right now?

A: A bit tired but it’s okay. Still fine to battle for a few days with the guys.

E: Your agent Mikko Rantanen gave me 12 minutes to talk to you about life, hockey, sports, partying and so on, and I want to start with the question that the whole nation is wondering, will the Stanley Cup come to Ruisrock? [a big music festival in Turku]

A: I don’t know if we can even get the replica with us unless we smuggle it back to Finland, but Rane said he’ll make us a copy out of tinfoil and we can bring it there.

E: So, Rane will make a tinfoil copy to make the grand vision of bringing the Cup on the Ruisrock stage true.

A: I think nobody will even be on stage when we get there and we’ll just mess around with the tinfoil craft cup by ourselves.

E: But you know that you are the show this year, right?

A: I guess.

E: Another thing that the nation needs an answer for, what was the deal with suit but no shirt? Was it pre-planned, that this is the look for the night if you win?

A: We just decided on a shirts optional policy

E: It was a good look on you, bold and brash.

A: Maybe a little.

E: what about the championship belt? I heard you had it on for the first 24 hours, do you still have it?

A: I had it for 48 hours but last night when we went out, I lost it. I hope I find it, because I had named myself the guardian of the belt but the guarding didn’t go too well because the belt somehow wandered off later in the night.

E: If anyone sees that belt in Denver, please return it to Artturi Lehkonen. But now I need names, you don’t have to be a snitch but I want names. Who had skiing goggles for the champagne spraying?

A: Well, I didn’t get to the locker room for that moment with Rane at all, we were still out on the ice. I think everyone took the goggles off after the first bottle. It’s more of a baseball and basketball thing, I think.

E: It’s very much a basketball thing. I can say that at least MacKinnon and Erik Johnson had them, but they’re right shooters, you have to give them leeway.

A: Yes, they play from the wrong side.

[beeping in the background]

E: What’s happening, are you parking a money truck there?

A: I don’t know what it is, I’m outside now. Maybe it’s an Amazon delivery, they’re bringing back the championship belt.

E: I thought it was Joe Sakic dumping money on your yard for you.

A: Not yet, I think.

E: Let’s talk about hockey for a bit. What did you think when MacKinnon’s pass bounced on your forehand, what went through your mind?

A: The puck bounced a lot, I just tried to hit it and get it in the direction of the goal, and it hit the shoebox in the back corner, it was a surprisingly good shot in that situation.

E: It was a dream shot, really, that kind of a bouncing puck right into the opposite corner, Vasilevsky had nothing on it. I know that you have put in a lot of reps with that shot and that was the pay day for all the work. 

A: Maybe you can say that, too.

E: I’m not letting you say that it was just a lucky bounce, that is what you have worked on. But in the big picture, your agent Mikko Rantanen gave us 12 minutes and we’re halfway now, I’m asking this: 8 goals in the playoffs, 4 game winning goals, the best in the whole NHL; is this the big dick Artturi moment here? The one where you say ‘come, I’ll take you all to the promised land’.

A: I’d say that Rane took me on his back in these playoffs a lot. It’s great to see the big boy start to rumble and take the team on his wide shoulders.

E: How is Rane doing in the Cup celebrations, does he have the chance to be the party MVP?

A: Oh yes, he has a hold of the MVP of the party trophy big time. He leads the troops with strict organization, he has a perfect plan for every day, what we’ll do.

E: Oh, so he is even some kind of a master of the ceremony?

A: Yes, yes he is. That’s why we only have twelve minutes for this, Rane said that we’ll head to his pool for a few drinks and some sun. We haven’t really seen the sun for two months now because you don’t want to be out and about very much, even though we’ve had some sunny days here.

E: Oh yes, Rane bought his lavish mansion, now he’s showing off to everyone how huge his pool is.

A: He’s all “not a big deal”.

E: If you think about Rane, he has practiced for this for a long time. Renting the whole river boat Donna [a popular bar] for his private party in Turku, it all has been preparation for this moment.

A: True. Rane is perfectly built for these situations, big boy, great tolerance, he can make damn good decisions in a pressure cooker or a crowded bus.

E: Okay, so the demands of the game will never get Rane off guard, so it’s no surprise that he is the MVP of the cup party. But speaking of the celebrations, you had a touching moment with your family on the ice, what did your old man Ika (Ismo) Lehkonen say to you when you had the family group hug? That moment of feedback, what did you go through?

A: (chuckles) Nothing really, we all just yelled. My sister kept shouting, “It’s so easy, [I’m tempted to translate ‘like it’s hard’ ;)] it’s so easy” and my dad kinda said well, it’s not that easy, but maybe it was this year.

E: Did you give any critique to your sister about her jersey choice, didn’t she come down on the ice in a MacKinnon jersey and your brother in a Landeskog jersey, what was the deal with that? Had Lehkonen been sold out?

A: No, there was a 6 week waiting period for my jerseys and they didn’t have the time to wait that long.

E: Okay, so family Lehkonen is still united after this. But as Artturi Lehkonen, are you okay with the fact that you have won more championship trophies in your life than Arsenal in that same time period?

A: (Sighs.) Personally, I’m okay with it. I believe that our Gunners will rise, We had a little meeting in the evening with Stan Kroenke, we have fine players coming up and we are headed up in the future.

E: Oh, so you are leading the build-up of the Arsenal roster with the owner Stan Kroenke?

A: Yeah, all we need is a few good re-signings, Saka for instance, and we’ll be working.

E: Did you know that you have achieved every little boy’s dream, you’re playing football fantasy manager with your own - I mean real money?

A: And not even with own money, with someone else’s money!

E: that’s boss level stuff right there. Tell me, when you hoist the Stanley Cup, is it heavy, how does it feel?

A: In that situation it felt heavy, I hadn’t done any upper body strength for two or three months, and you have to lift that huge trophy above your head, it is a bit intimidating, I didn't want to fall over and be a meme for the rest of my life. Although you did get some good meme material out of my shirtless moment.

E: I promise, you will always be a meme here if you do something epic like that. It was a true big dick Artturi moment.

A: it was funny to check them out, a couple of my friends had done some photoshopping too and I was like thanks a lot, dudes.

E: Seriously speaking, I felt that the whole country was behind you and Rane in the playoff run, did you notice it and how does it feel for a player?

A: It was damn cool. We got a lot of supportive messages throughout the playoffs, that this is going to be our year, and it did give us faith in our goal.

E: That is a nice way to wrap this up, we have used our 12 minutes and Mikko Rantanen will tear your phone out of your hand, and you will have to go and admire and suck up to Mikko and his amazing new pool. Who’s coming there, you, MacKinnon, Makar?

A: Rane’s party? No, it’s just us Finns, me and Annunen and our families. We’ll go on from there to wherever we meet up with the team next.

E: Will you promise that you let yourself enjoy this unique moment?

A: I will enjoy this. You’ve got to enjoy this, soak it up, not rush anywhere.

[drugsforaddicts]

"Mrs. Käärijä has to put up with enough for one person."

Even he agrees with us. Now let's stop fighting.