Gwen: I like both equally. I have no sense of taste or smell but I enjoy the textures of them depending on my mood *she says this nonchalantly, it doesn't bother Gwen*
Gwen: one of my sisters is teaching me to cook. Mostly Veitnamese food and Indian food is what we're doing. My other sister is my scope for where to go normally😁
*we get to the taco/burrito.. Mexican stand, the menu is above where the stand is*
Gwen: so many choices😲
Both willow and noir look horrified to learn you have no sense of taste
Willow: NO TASTE REALLY? BUT HOW, ER
Noir: WHAT MY FRIEND IS TRUONG TO SAY IS HOW DO YOU SURVIVE
Willow: THATS NOT IT!! HAVE YOU ALWAYS NOT HAD IT?
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Sunday 🌿🌱🍃
-went for a run around a park nearby in the morning and there were so many people out, feel like the running scene must be pretty decent here since it’s home to a world major
-walked to the sunday market at mauerpark (shoutout @just-anka for the rec) and wandered for a bit before grabbing smoothies and this super good kimchi pancake thing, we were talking about how it’s great that they give so many samples out here of things people otherwise probably wouldn’t try ALSO the amount of vegan options here is INSANE it’s really cool
-went to the main monument area kinda like their version of the mall in DC and wandered a bit
-spent way too long coming up with a pretzel-beer plan but I think the final outcome was pretty good, quickly followed by gelato
-wandered around tiergarten and stumbled into some sort of political rally
-followed by laying around in the grass for a bit
-came home for a lil rest after spending the day walking 26282628 miles, exhausted but I love the walkability of european cities unlike a lot of US ones
-grabbed veitnamese food for dinner, we got a tequila sunrise that tasted like straight up fresh squeezed orange juice
-went to the big ole tower and up to the observation deck and caught the last of the sunset and the city at night AND a blood moon which was cool
Time for full day number 2 👊🏼😎
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Businesses I Worry About
When thinking of get rich quick schemes, good ideas might include:
Dropshipping
Chill hop radio streams on YouTube (there has to be some money to be made, right?)
Automating the set-up of Wordpress sites (actually cool themes, basic pages, get rid of shitty blog post format so a business can use it, etc.) and charge ~$20/site
ATM skimmers
Buy the domain www.jetstor.com and make it look exactly like JetStar’s site. Sell fake plane tickets. Use elaborate VPNs and darkweb security stuff to avoid detection. Once the scam ceases to be profitable repeat with virgon.com and any other business where a user might mistype the website’s URL. I’d suggest this scam works best for businesses with a ‘u’, ‘i’ and/or ‘o’ in the name as these three letters sit beside each other on the keyboard (facilitating fat-fingered typos) and also people tend to pay less attention to vowels
Not high at the top of anyone’s list: opening a restaurant.
You may not think this wandering through Chinatown, perhaps on account of the the hand-written BYO WINE ONLY signs or perhaps because of the waiters killing fish in the alleys*, but the choice to open a restaurant is indicative of the kind of pure human energy which has nothing to do with wanting to get rich.
(*I swear they do this at New Kum Den - when someone chooses one of the depressed barramundi from the tank, they fish it out, put it in a bucket and then sneak off to kill it in the alley so the kitchen doesn’t get all fish’d up.)
Just think of everything that could go wrong:
Ruinous upfront and ongoing costs
Unfair reviews
Unreliable twenty-something staff
Think about how much chairs and plates and mops and cutesy pot plants and signs cost. How many tea towels do you need? How many forks? Think about how hard it must be to find a full staff of people you trust. Think about opening for the first day and no one buying anything. Same deal on the second day. Your vegetables start to go bad in the fridge. Did you make a mistake?
This is basically my opinion on restaurants: they are risky investments, shouldered by the courageous so that the whole community has places to go where they can eat delicious ramen or dumplings or fried chicken with blue cheese sauce. With that in mind, why would anyone risk it all to open the establishment pictured below?
Falafel Place opened on Smith Street around 6 months ago. As you can see, it is not stylish - that’s why they called it Falafel Place rather than Palace. It already looks tired and it just opened. It doesn’t beckon. It doesn’t repel. It just exists (for now).
The Smith Street area is already home to many kebab/Lebanese cheap eats joints:
The only angle I can see that Falafel Place may have is that they specialise in vegetarian food (i.e. no kebabs here - only falafel, tabbouleh, etc.) but there’s nothing to recommend this place beyond being vego-friendly.
Something about this place has really gotten under my skin. None of the kebab joints (with a possible exception of Lamb on Brunswick) I’ve highlighted above is especially creative or adventurous in what they’ve opened. I don’t feel a glow of human courage and pride emanating from those businesses - but they do have one thing going for them (beyond the meat): the baked-in grease in the walls, the ravaged staff who have become canny to the ways of the local drunks (getting your kebab is like a hostage negotiation - you’ll have to hand over the cash before you get your food). There’s just something grotty but dependable about the local kebab joints. Like the raw onions in a kebab, it brings a tear to your eye. Not so with Falafel Place. I feel so much pity for the owners. Why would you risk so much money (Smith St rent can’t be cheap - how much fucking falafel will you need to sell to make ends meet?) on a place which looks so disinterested - disinterested in falafel and disinterested in selling us falafel. Do you people even like falafel? Nothing about this place suggests even a passing interest in falafel. Falafel PLACE?!
INTERVIEWER: Excuse me Mr. Proprietor, could you tell us something about what inspired you to open this establishment?
PROPRIETOR: Huh?
INTERVIEWER: Could you spare some time to -
PROPRIETOR: Are you talking to me?
INTERVIEWER: Yes, aren’t you the genius behind this fine falafel restaurant?
PROPRIETOR: Ah yeah.
INTERVIEWER: So, could you tell us a bit about what inspired you to open such a -
PROPRIETOR: Look lady, falafel just spawns here. Every morning we come into the office and find all our desk drawers full of falafel.
INTERVIEWER: You mean you don’t lovingly cook this using a recipe your great-grandmother left you in her will?
PROPRIETOR: No we don’t cook it. We’re accountants. We just sell falafel out of the office reception so it doesn’t attract ants where we’re trying to work.
INTERVIEWER: But why not just eat it yourselves - I don’t understand.
PROPRIETOR: Eat the falafel? I can’t stand the stuff. So dry. It’s awful.
INTERVIEWER: I have to say this is one of the more candid interviews I’ve conducted for Made Up Falafel Magazine. Could you explain the thinking process behind the name?
PROPRIETOR: Falafel Place? Well, yeah we didn’t want to lay it on too thick with superlatives or -
INTERVIEWER: Or even a name which wasn’t a statement of fact.
PROPRIETOR: Look, this is a place where there is falafel. Buy it or not - I really don’t care.
Meanwhile... not too much further along Smith Street, is another newish business: Sen Storm, a Veitnamese fusion restaurant. This premises used to be occupied by a New Orleans po boy joint which seemed to be perpetually closed. A few months ago, I saw that they were re-tiling the shopfront - like so, I think it actually looks really nice:
(It’s closed in this pic - it normally looks a bit more welcoming)
Maybe it’s because I was dimly aware of the failure of the po boy place, but I am very stressed for Sen Storm. Every time I walk past, I look in to see if they have enough customers. Are the staff busy? Are people eating there? Is it being enjoyed? I desperately want the people of Sen Storm to have made a good investment. I can feel the care radiating out of this place - they want it to be nice, they want people to enjoy it. They’re trying something new. Vietnamese food is typically pretty cheap in Melbourne: $12 bowls of pho, $4 banh mi on Victoria Street. Sen Storm is edging their way into fancier restaurant prices ($25 mains, nice cocktails) - there are not many other places in Melbourne doing nice napkin Vietnamese.
I read this interesting article on why noodles are cheap compared to pasta - it has a lot to do with our biases relating to the hierarchy of cuisines:
The other issue in all of this, is us, the dining public. What prices are we willing to pay for pad Thai, ramen or a plate of dumplings? All the chefs interviewed acknowledged a cultural hierarchy that makes noodles cheap and pasta expensive.
"Why would people pay $30 for cacio e pepe, which is really just pasta, black pepper and cheese, but they won't pay more than $10 for three amazingly made har gau or xiao long bao, which probably require a whole lot more skill than making pasta?" asks Dan Hong.
Narada Kudinar, co-owner of Sydney's Yan, sees this play out in his Chinese-style smokehouse.
"We get people who walk into the restaurant, after Googling we are the top-rated Asian restaurant in the area and walking out after seeing the menu prices."
Mr Bayad feels the same frustration running his inner-Sydney Filipino restaurant.
"Customers frequently come in claiming they ate the same food for 43 cents at a street market in the Philippines.
"I deal with that fairly often here and it's an old conversation — I'm just sick of it. The production [of food] here is completely different."
It's an expectation rooted in mainstream experiences of Asian food — from chicken chow mein in suburban Chinese takeaway restaurants with the lucky cat figurines to $1 pad Thai on Bangkok streets.
Even those with Asian heritage can hold the same prejudices. "The easy stereotypes are very ingrained — the idea of yum cha being a 'hangover food' and Chinese being a 'quick, cheap option' — that is ingrained in me as well," says Dr Lee.
^^ This graph is from an Atlantic article from a few years ago which also looks at our biases around food, like why we will pay more for Japanese and French food than Chinese or Thai. Anyway, I do believe tastes and expectations are changing, but the point I’m trying to make is that Sen Storm is part of a new wave - they’re taking a risk and they care.
After months of anxiously peering into Sen Storm, wondering what it was like, I finally went with Matt. We ordered:
Duck curry: orange duck leg curry with egg noodles
Pepper venison: venison seasoned with Vietnamese mountain pepper served with parsnip puree and chilli chutney
Nice, right? I did photograph the food but my pictures were awful (my proud tradition of producing vomitous food photographs continues) but you can see a bit of the venison in the pic below and a corner of the curry as well. Both were very tasty and it felt like a surprising meal. Again, they’re trying something new.
I can understand why the people at Sen Storm took the risk - they had an idea, something to share, and they opened a restaurant which is still not bustling but is slowly accumulating positive reviews and will hopefully grow into a successful business. But if restaurants are risky investments - does it make sense to gamble on something you care about? Is Sen Storm more likely to do better than Falafel Place because the Sen Stormians are passionate? Maybe - but the margin by which Sen Storm has to do better is huge because building something special has cost them a lot more. Falafel Place is built on a foundation of plastic takeout containers.
In short, I am still worried about Sen Storm.
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