#vosling thoughts

[vosling]

After a day of people reblogging this piece and most of the reblogs not tagging at all or only tagging #SINKHOLE… Wow that feels kinda bad, actually. Did not expect that (it has not happened with other fanart I've shared)

I guess it's because it was a piece about disability and the commodification of the body, and then, welp. I felt like the art was extracted. I know that was not the intend of the people who shared my work, and I'm not calling anyone out :) It's a new interesting layer of the art and SINKHOLE experience to me. I want to add it to this piece.

In SINKHOLE Season 1, there is the Narrator, looking for connection to their past and yearning for human connection in the present. Which they find (as best as they can) through data restoration and the online forum they post in. Connecting with the people there, in a genuine honest way, is a double-edged sword. You need to show yourself and be vulnerable in order to truly connect with people. Because of their rare medical status/disability/history, that obviously means safety (doxxing) risks in the long term. But in the short term, there's a more emotional risk, the compounded trauma of being treated as a novelty, an interesting thing, and no longer fully human of with their own agency. I've been there. It's happened in real life and in digital spaces. People notice signs of my disabilities, or I choose to share bits and pieces, and -> now they are talking about me with each other. Speculating about my health. Speculating about how I'm able to do XYZ when my disabilities are reported to be a severe case of ABC. All of this often while I'm present in the space. My medical status a topic of conversation without my involvement nor my consent.

I have a lot of disabilities. Part of me wants to listen them here to highlight aspects of what I'm trying to communicate here. Part of me has the experience of SINKHOLE's Narrator: talking about it puts me at risk. And I can't trust the anonymous blob of people reading this to all treat me with respect, and not like an interesting novelty. "A visual artist with VIP? How does that even work?"

Anyway. Back to the head full of stars art piece and my experience sharing it. I noticed that conversely, even just a quick "Fuck yeah", exclamation mark, or "wow" in the tags helped to make me feel that I was in conversation with fellow fans. So I'm going to take that lesson moving forward, and make sure I am in conversation with the artist in the hashtags when I share art. Talk with them. Not about them.

Finally. I want to put some of the hashtags of when I first shared it here in this post.

#the way the narrator said (paraphrased) “There are people out there who wish we had never come out of the hole” #I felt that in my bones #I'm glad I've worked through enough of my pandemic trauma to engage with media like this because it's so meaningful #But yeah #the way we were discarded like acceptable deaths at the bottomline #because only the elderly and disabled (the weak) would die from this catastrophic pandemic that turned out to be a mass disabling event #and it happens over and over again #this ongoing / recurring / never-ending grief of being betrayed by society and being told it's time to move on #anyway

#what did you do to deserve your eyes today?

Head full of stars.

I listened to Sinkhole S1 two days in a row, and then S2 today. The way it depicted physical disability, ableism, and institutional betrayal - it meant a lot.

[vosling]

I'm so glad I found horror podcast fandom I'm so glad I can make art about my Feels and share it and share in celebrating each other's work. So glad. So grateful.

So many thoughts about the Empty Heads having disco rollerblade parties at the mansion and Shaun and John sitting in Johns cabin, just having dinner (@deadbysnowpod YOU ARE NOT READY I WILL GET YOU BACK). So excited to sit down and pick colors and cocreate and make weird art.

Being an artist means I can make the images in my head reality and I need to use these powers irresponsibly /pos

[vosling]

Daily topics of conversation

WOE.BEGONE

Art

Art I'm making about WOE.BEGONE

Podcasts that aren't W.BG but still very cool

Memery with my besties

Neighbourhood corvid gossip of the day

One of my friends is binging on WOE.BEGONE and needs to !! about it

I need to !! about it

Here's a picture of a fish

Here's a picture of a vulture

Here's a picture of a crow

US US US LITERALLY US

The meatsuit is // flesh maintenance

Did you see my post?

I saw your post YOU'RE SO FUCKING FUNNY

Bestie I had an Omen again and we need to Talk

The energy of this week is just- Pfffffff

Yeah, I know

Let me tell you about the astro of it all because THIS FUCKN RETROGRADE

Oh btw, have you read this fic?

Fucked up /pos

So true birdstie

OH HEY HI I read your thoughts and they were very tasty

I'm sorry, I know I talk about W.BG too much but-

Here's a picture of my cat

Witchcraft

And what it means to be a Priest

Life is hard

But all this makes it worthwhile

I love you

Talk tomorrow <3

[lazy-toad]

@vosling

EXACTLY!! He's had no time to process anything and now he's stuck using this glorified app that he doesn't know how to use!! He's so tied to Tex in a way he can't escape! It's not his leg. It's Tex's. He didn't want it. Tex did. And I hadn't even thought about the possibility of it having tracking capabilities but you're absolutely right!

Genuinely Stinky waking up to the smart leg attached to him is body horror to me